Talk:Total Drama Genesis

Polls
Based on first impressions, who is your favorite contestant so far? Aiden Bethany Cynthia Diamonique Easton Frannie Griswold Hayden Ignacio Jasper Kalino Lita Melissa Ness Pascal Riley Seraphina Tessa Vance Weston Xidorn Zipporah

Who is your favorite team so far? Molting Eagles Fizzled Fireworks

Chat
I'm here to protest against this story #BringBackWhatTheHeck #BringBackUsedMiniVan. No, I'm jking. Yay for a new Rhonda fic, it seems promosing, and the idea seems interesting. Can't wait for this! <3 "Perhaps that is the secret. It is not what we do,   so much as why we do it."  01:17, October 23, 2015 (UTC)

Fight me then :p Seriously though, thanks for commenting Bruno <3 I'm so glad your excited for it and like what you see so far. I've got tons of ideas and can't wait to see what you think of them all! You won't have to wait long as the chapter should be up this Saturday :D  But let me ask you this? If you ain't not a super villain, than why would you need a bulletproof face?  04:25, October 23, 2015 (UTC)

I can't wait! <3 Just drop off characters descriptions to me sometime whenever you want pics for your cast! ^^ --  Oh  , we don't own our   Heavens   now, we only own our   Hell  ...  05:36, October 23, 2015 (UTC)

I'm so glad to hear that Reddy :D I think (hope) you'll like the humor. And thank you so much! I was originally going to have the contestants descriptions mentioned more detailed in story...but I'm thinking about dropping it for more space, especially since I know you'll make amazing images <3 I'll give you a heads up when I know more, but thank you for checking <3  But let me ask you this? If you ain't not a super villain, than why would you need a bulletproof face?  04:15, October 24, 2015 (UTC)

I'm looking forward to this!! :D I love your writing and your zany humor!!! :D  And I adored Renee in RR. :D <3 Very fun antagonists. :)  Jay JLOM  There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row. xD  22:05, October 24, 2015 (UTC)

Jay! <3 I'm so excited to here you're looking forward to this and thank you :3 I hope it compares well to my old stuff. And me too! Josee was a very fun anatagonist <3  What could possibly go wrong?  23:29, October 24, 2015 (UTC)

Im on mobile so i cant make a comment. I will when i wake up tho! Just wanted to let you know i read the chapter. And i cant wait for the rest! Ps i think you should quickly reread it. There are aeast 5 tines where you missed a word, or reversed the order of words :3    Z a c  A tt a c k     Rawr 01:24, October 25, 2015 (UTC)

So I read all three parts of the first chapter, like I told you in chat a while ago, and I'm finally deciding to make a comment! First of all, I just have to say that I really love it so far <3 I like the cast a lot more than WTH's, while there were some hilarious characters there too, I'm not as huge of a fan of stories mixing canon characters and OCs and I'm glad Genesis is entirely OCs. I also love that the overall cast is less ridiculously OTT this time around, while ridiculously OTT characters are always fun (and I mean, almost my entire TDSS cast is made up of them, so I'm not sure if I even have any room to talk ;\) it's also really good to have balance. I described some of my favorites to you in chat already, but so far I love a majority of the characters. Cynthia is delivering even more now that she's talking (<3) and I have no idea where her plot is going to go at all, but I love it. As I told you earlier, she still kinda reminds me of Crimson & Ennui, but something tells me she's not quite as soft on the inside as them... Speaking of goths, I also love Zipporah, she's had some hilarious lines and great interactions. Other characters who have consistently delivered when they've spoken are Vance and Kalino, they both remind me of ToadCharacters (especially Kalino, who's barely done anything but I have this weird love for him), and Frannie is also really fun (I think picturing her character image whenever she speaks also helps her out a lot? Reddy's pics are amazing tbh). Though really, I like almost everyone in the cast - there are many others who I haven't even mentioned yet but they're still fun, and outside of a couple characters like Hayden who I just don't think are very interesting right now (though I'm sure he'll do more stuff later on, too) everyone is delivering. I wasn't the hugest fan of Bethany, but she was alright, and I'm glad she got some good backstory before she got out - she was a perfect first out because she had a nice, fairly fleshed-out little arc but I also didn't really feel passionate towards her and didn't care too much that she got out first. That's pretty much how all first outs should be like, I feel. I also love your way of writing the mini-challenges, they've been fun in their first showing and I always love when people can sneak tons of character interactions into challenges too <3 The setting is also great, I like that it's in an urban, American setting that I'm able to picture in my head fairly well, because it makes reading the challenges and the parts where they're running from spot to spot super vivid in my head, which is always a really nice thing. And Rhonda's banter with the cohosts is great too, I'm really glad they returned! Overall, I think I've said a lot about the chapters already, but they've been awesome so far and I'm eager to read the next one! ^^ And we will never be alone again, 'cause it doesn't happen every day...  22:29, November 14, 2015 (UTC)


 * D: I'm super late to this comment! I've seen it and discussed it with you on chat, but I still should've replied because I apprecitate it so much that you read it and took the time to comment (and for all the feedback you've given me on chat :p).


 * I'm so thrilled you like it <3 I agree, I think WTH did have a very OTT cast, well some were OTT and everyone else was INV. I'm trying to balance the cast and focus a lot more for this story, especially because of a word count limit and make it so characters have a varying 'edit', being UTR sometimes than OTT or CPP at other times and trying to write it in the frame of an actual reality show edit. I've gotten some mixed feedback on it but I'm glad to hear you think it works <3


 * Cynthia's plot I'm so excited for, and will come in the next chapter (6) ;) I'll just say that there's a reason Cynthia's been a bit INV in 4 and 5... xD she does seem similar to the goths, and I know you're a fan (me too of course) so I enjoy it. Zipporah is very similar, so I'm glad she's working too!


 * Kalino and Vance are similar to ToadCharacters, which was very intentional with Kalino. Vance wasn't neccessarily planned to be as Toad-like, but I see it too. It might just be because they're some of the best comedic characters right now <3 I'm really glad this whole cast is holding up well. Frannie too (and Reddy's pictures slay <3)


 * Yeah, Hayden hasn't exactly stood out and I'm working on it but we'll see how it goes. Bethany was a bit of a blunder I admit, but at the least she was a learning experience. And I'm glad she came across as the perfect first out. Yay, the challenge worked out, I was a bit nervous for some reason. I'm trying to balance challenges with interactions and actions, so glad you liked it <3 And hooray that the setting works and the hosts to do, I was a bit afraid with the setting so that's reassuring. And I love writing for Rhonda, Jenny and Toby (OC hosts are so fun omg).


 * Thanks again so much for commenting Toad <3 I'm super glad you've been keeping up and giving me such great feedback!  What could possibly go wrong?  03:24, December 16, 2015 (UTC)

I've already showed you these, but, here are my bullet points / chronological thoughts for the first chapter! Baby • take me • to the • feeling • I'll be your sinner in secret!  04:56, March 30, 2016 (UTC)
 * Chris disappearing </3 I hope he makes some sort of debut in the series
 * the descriptions are really good, especially in the beginning (that added a lot of context and introduced the story in a non-stereotypical way that even I’m guilty of).
 * yaaaay <3 @co-hosts. I think jenny and toby are completely polar opposites. I also think it’d be great if the co-hosts are treated as the 23rd and 24th characters, with jenny maturing and toby learning how to lighten up.
 * although not the same as DC, I live in new york so the whole subway introduction thing gave me mild PTSD. :-(
 * Bethany <333 I really love her bio and her fear of not living up to people’s expectations. I thought she would be a generic over-achiever but she’s actually pretty complex in that she has insecurities and stuff about not performing well.
 * LOL Cynthia following Xidorn. <3 Although Cynthia definitely feels like a filler character she’ll be funny in the scenes she’s in. I like Xidorn too because his whole morally-correct route could lead to him being too preachy.
 * literally wtf @ the inside of cynthia’s bag. no words.
 * omg yay twins!!! Samey/Amy were kind of handled badly in real TD so I’m hoping Weston / Easton either have some great rivalry OR they’re just a cute, endearing dynamic duo that gets along. <3 Either option is fine.
 * Tessa didn’t really make an impact on me. Her bio makes me think she’s gonna be the main protagonist or something but otherwise she didn’t really do much for me.
 * is it bad that I relate to Diamonique the most even though she feels like fodder? I feel like I also lack common sense at times tbh so I’m rooting for her to prove everyone wrong. <3
 * I have an irrational hatred for athletes (Bethany is the exception) so Griswold isn’t one of my  favorite. I beg you to not make sports the only thing he talks about.
 * Patriots are an underutilized trope/character in fics, tbh. Unlike athletes, for example, Aiden can talk about his patriotism for his entire stay and I’d love every bit of it. Though I think it’d be funny if he got carried away with it and it became some kind of nationalism instead.
 * Seraphina’s marina reference on her shirt <3333 (I assume her name is a reference too).
 * … I know I said Tessa didn’t make an impact on me but y e s @her dragging Seraphina. She seems so holier-than-thou and that’s 100x more interesting than her being like the OTTP fan favorite or something. <3
 * I feel like Ness and Seraphina could have some cool interactions together. Since Ness constantly jinxes himself, maybe Seraphina comes to his aid and uses her psychic magic or whatever to help him? Idk, but their characters both have really ~ spiritual ~ undertones to it.
 * Hayden’s stereotype of being the “big brother” to everyone seems like such an obvious thing to use but I’ve never seen it before in a fic. I feel like him being a paternal figure to everyone could get really annoying to the rest of the contestants, really fast. But I’m rooting for him since he seems like such a good guy with good intentions <3
 * Ziba is the best contestant tbh. But Frannie seems really funny, and I think she could have some good interactions with Seraphina maybe? They both seem really “out there” and sometimes psychics are at carnivals. It’d be funny if Frannie tried to recruit her or something
 * I actually died at Seraphina’s “I didn’t know we had a poet”. I feel the same. Kalino actually was hilarious just because he seems so inept socially. I hope he proves that he’s not just a dumb surfer and makes it really far
 * I think Vance has a hard time being wrong. Like when Rhonda told him to be careful and he immediately dismissed it because he’s an expert, even though he was leaning against wet paint. I’m hoping that someone takes him down a peg or he realizes that he’s being too arrogant. Lots of potential in him
 * I loved Pascal’s corny lines like “if we all believe, we can achieve.” <3 He’s so pseudo-deep and it’s hilarious. Especially since it somehow inspired Rhonda
 * Melissa seems like a dark horse winner to me, mostly because Rhonda said that she was a late addition. but I hope she’s not just constantly the nice person to everyone. It’d be great if someone gets on her nerves and she cracks
 * Lol Tessa getting in a fight with EVERYONE. <3 Tessa vs. Aiden about America was a fun minor scene. Especially after Tessa’s introduction to the cast, I thought she would be adored by everyone. But it’s a pleasant surprise that everyone’s image of her, a “perfect celebrity”, is being shattered because she’s totally insane. <3
 * everyone getting Jasper’s name wrong <//33333333333 for some reason I love him and think he has a lot of potential. I hope he starts to ~ shine ~ and becomes a force to be reckoned with, even though people glossed over him
 * Zipporah wanting to #take down the Hollywood standard of what a goth is. <3 She’s a much better activist than Xidorn.
 * Awwww poor Ignacio. I think his goals of just wanting to be a normal guy really contrasts with Pascal who jumps from reality show to reality show. I hope they have some good interactions together, whether it’s a conflict or a friendship.
 * Riley didn’t leave much of an impression on me
 * I love Lita!!! She seems like she could be a really great, feisty character without compromising her femininity or anything. I also think she could have a really great compelling plot about being underestimated because of her looks. I hope her and Ignacio team up somehow <3
 * Lol Cynthia not being in the final group count <3
 * I really like how we got to see into Rhonda’s thoughts. Usually people use confessionals for TD fics but that kind of third person view can lead to a deeper understanding of people’s thoughts that we wouldnt really see otherwise.

Zactastic Corner:
Sme authors hate when I make my own sections... But my comments tend to be rather different than most... So I like to have my own section for them. That being said, you can move it under the rest if you so choose.

For this story, I really want to start with the one thing I think makes it unique compared to most stories, and something I tried to do in Frozen, but moved away from it as time moved on, because people seemed to care lesss. And that idea, or trope, or I don't know what to call it, I'm not an English major, is the focus on the host. In the majority of the stories on here, asides from Total Drama: Paradise Falls & Frozen, the host, while they may have a large sum of lines, due to the role of the character they see no progression, or character thought or process. I like to think of the host, as the extra competitor, the person who is not competiting, but has a lot of potentional for character growth because the odds are they will be in almost every chapter- and if you have a sequel they could be there too! They have a role that no other character in your story can take on. Using the previous examples, in Bruno's story, you have the whole Chris-Blainely-Crystal story arc going on through out the entire story, which (minor spoilers) leads to change in hosts for the second second.... And from the first two chapters is leading to a very interesting mother-daughter dynamic. In my own story Frozen, the actual host isn't the one seeing interactions with the contestants, that would be the interns who literally take the place of a contestant and interact with the cast, building a relationship and character that wouldn't work out if the interns weren't focused. All of that being said, I really enjoy that you seem to be using the same approach. Right now, despite not really having any specific character to root for, due to the nature of the first chapter itself, I am rooting for Rhonda. I want her show to succeed, and I really want to see THAT story line be an arc, rather than just a one-time thing. It's unique, and interesting and that's what makes a good story.

Moving on to theme/location. I'm not exactly sure if it was mentioned? I read on my mobile device so there is a very good chance I managed to quickly skim over it, but as far as I know the story takes place in Washington. Whether that be a camp ground, which seems to be the ideal location for the overall reboot of the series, or an abandoned location (I think I saw abandoned in the text somewhere!) I'm not sure. The BIG thing going on here is that you took a Canadian delicacy and tarnished it with the American branding - if you weren't my twin I would have stopped reading right there and then, but I will suffer through for you. On the location though, I am really curious to see exactly where it will all be taking place, you're doing a three-parter, so you have plenty of time to reveal the location so I'm in no hurry though. I'm really hoping to see a difference though, like Rhonda said this isn't the Canadian version, because the show is taking place in America is anything going to be different? Will the actual country itself have an effect on the actual story?

There is one thing I really want to bring up and I'm almost have tempted to do up a writer's workshop on it, because I always leave the same type of comment on the introductions, and it's not a BAD thing persay, so don't threat. And if the following sounds like I did not like your approach, then my tone was off, you story was great!

There are TWO ways to do an introduction chapter, in my opinion anyways (three if you go all-out and pull an Ash.... but I don't reccomend that.) The first of which, is what you and many, many people do, and it leads to the usual first chapter is a good portion shorter than every other chapter in the story. What happens in these stories is the writer puts a massive focus on introducing each character, rather than interactions. Which is fine, it's the introduction chapter, that's the point! The other way, which is my preffered, (but I still really do enjoy the other aproach) is putting more of a focus on the interactions that a charater has to build up their character and to introduce them that way. The thing about your first chapter is that you're in between both, which is again fine. But because you didn't 100% commit to either choice there a number of characters who I don't remember who they are. Had you really focused on each of their introductions to show how they were all unique then that would have been solved, or had you ~filled~ the chapter out with a handful of interactions, I would have rememebered the characters based on how they interacted. Either way, it's fine. It IS the introduction chapter. But I think you should be weary of this going forward, I mean I've read your past stories so I know this isn't the case, but a good number of readers don't understand the difference between an introduction chapter, and everything else. And so they continue to write these blobs of characters who never really interact, so they never grow, and so I just don't care about who they are.

I want to add this in here, since I tend to only comment on a single character page per story, due to the effort. I really like that you put effort into them. There are a number of potential story lines that were created just from the character pages, so  even though you didn't make a massive amount of potential story lines in the first chapter, it's made up for in the character pages, if that makes sense.

I'm going to briefly go over the cast, since I do not like making rankings until the first elimination, for lazy purposes of course. And then offer a few story-line suggestions. They are in order of preference, asides from WHO? characters, where it is via the alphabet.

Weston- The Younger Twin  Zactastic Twin. I'm going to feel really bad for saying this, if I'm wrong, but is Weston slow? I am pretty sure he has something going on in that head of his. But he's so adorable and I love him to pieces. Just based on the character pages we know Easton is the actual person, and Weston is the follower, and I have a thing for followers. All he does is repeat Easton, and blatantly stare at attractive girls. Plus he's not on the math team, there's something up with Weston, but if you eliminate him before the merge I will have a bone to pick with you.

Cynthia - This chick. In the character bio I thought oh hey, she prolly did something TERRIBLE and so everyone hates her, but it was by accident or something, and so I instantly fell in love with her, feeling bad. Then I read the chapter, and then proceded to have a dream where a crazy chick was throwing knives at me. Connection? I'm thinking yes. However, as you can see, she is my second favourite character in the entire story. She is also, in my opinion the most ~Rhonda~ character. I am incredibly intrigued by her, especially how she seemed to know it was going to rain before it actually started... Maybe she is unlucky?

Vance - I never thought that a character who reminded me of horses would ever become one of my favourites. I even wrote him off during the character pages as boring, and that I wouldn't care about him. But he is really really entertaining! His whistling? Perfect! And I am waiting for someone to call him on it! I really can't wait to see how he interacts with people!

Ignacio - A very good plot twist I think. I was ready to rank him in my top three, based on his stereotype, it's one of the typical traits of a Zactastic character, after all. But then you tricked me, and tricked your cast! I actually REALLY enjoy him now. And I want to know exactly what is up with this guy. Why does he not want people to know he is a model? Did he only do it for quick cash?

Melissa - She stole my heart. I really hope she bakes me snickerdoodles! She is such a sweetie, and I like to pretend that she's Canadian and just recently moved to the states, because she's too nice to be American. She makes me feel so happy as a character, and she's adorable. I feel like your hinting towards Aiden x Melissa so that could be super cute too!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Aiden - Errrr mah gawd. The true maple syrup in my veins is telling me to hate this kid. But I just can't. Aiden is oddly adorable, and I keep picturing him as ~slightly~ younger or atleast appears to be than the rest of the cast. I really hope you keep Aiden around for a little bit, because he is how I understand what is going on in the story in terms of American things, because I can't even name two states, so his information is much appreciated. Asides from that though, I can just see him grinding Rhonda's gears, and his potential story with Melissa really makes me like him. Even though he's of a trope that I generally dislike.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Seraphina - Seraphina is all of us. She literally is tossing shade like she's Opera! "AND YOU GET SOME SHADE AND YOU AND YOU!" She's amazing, plus her actual reason for joining the show is pure gold. I hope we see more of her... and her physic powers. Slightly WHO? Though.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Ness- I pity her. She has some terrible luck, but she also show how terrible America is. A homeless person stole all of your stuff? Awwww sucks. I kinda hope a cute guy let's her wear some of his clothes, simply because that would be really cute. However asides from a really interesting intro, she was Who?

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Lita -  I'm really interested with where you go with her. As a character on her own, I don't think she is interesting at all. I feel like she isn't worth my time to care about. As a character in a story with Weston, and Cynthia, I feel like she has plot potential, and I really hope we see those story lines, and her as a character grow.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Jasper - Another WHO? Character, but I know that was done on purpose and I remember his WHOness, so good job! I actually really like (thanks for explaining... I shouldn't read chapters lying in bed) how no one can remember who he is, not even the narrator. I think he will be fun and unique.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Frannie - I think she had one of my favourite introductions, and that's how I remember her. She was unique and another ~Rhonda~ typical character. I really enjoyed what she brought to the table, and I want to see what happens with her character, considering she comes from an extremly unique... back ground. I kinda hope she loses the Lemur and forces some guillable people to help her find it? IDK, but I don't see her going very far, she's very gimmicky right now.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Zipporah - She's really REALLY iffy for me. She was sitting borderline like and dislike from the character page. Goths can, on occasion be written wonderfully. But they can also end up bland and boring. From the first chapter she;s still borderline she didn't do anything reall. She reminds me of the goths from the Ridonculas Race in the fact I think she's going to be a major one-liner character until we love her and then she will get sent home.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Pascal - His traits alone mean he should be one of my top characters. He has a massive ego, and he's peppy and happy go lucky. These are all traits that make someone Zactastic. Together however, they make me annouyed. Pascal is boring.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Tessa- She's the medal chick, who I have no interest in. Either who or Bethany should be the first boot, prefeable followed by the other.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Diamonique - Your story is doing strange things to my typical rankings. Anyone who follows my rankings know that nerd and or ewwwwwwwy chubby guys are always last, and the dumb hot characters are almost GURANTEED first or second. However I can not justify putting Diamonique that high. I will admit between her bio, and her introduction she is funny, and so I don't want to see her leave. But I do not want her to win, and I don't really care about her? As far as I can tell she can't hold a story line, unless she forgets about it two seconds later.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Easton-  The Older Twin   The twin i don't like. I blame my intense disliking for him on my bias against characters who are related. I actually 100% hate them. I find writers do not know how to properly write them as characters, and so one of the two will leave super early. And because I have an INTENSE amount of love for Weston, I want to be it very clear that Easton is the exenable one - not Weston, don't hurt my baby please.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Riley - I'm 99% sure the only thing he said is Broseph, which made me happy on the inside. If that's not all he said, then that's the only thing I found interesting.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Griswold - No idea who this person is.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Hayden- I was really interested in this character from the character page, but I don't remember who he is.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Kalino-  No clue who this person is.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Xidorn- The person who i don't remember

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Bethany - Burn this ho with fire. I read ALL of the character pages to help me know which characters I wanted to look forward to, and to see if any of them I would hate. Bethany was actually one of the characters I looked forward to the most! Her entire story line about her parents seemed really interesting, and I know she is hiding something. But lordy lord, she is so obnoxious and annouying in the actual story, that I just don't even care anymore. Like let me write out that story line in  After the Drama  and the problem is solved. Seriously though, she is just way too typical and boring. Which normaly is fine, because hey, characters GROW. But she was mention 33? times in this chapter, where a number of characters barely reached 6 mentions. This is an issue, and so it makes it seem like she will be an early boot, but if not you need to rethink your writing.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Some interactions I would LIKE to see.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Aiden-Melissa --- Rhonda : If you do use the idea that I gave you I feel like this pairing, I feel like this pairing would be the best choice. The first two characters already have been hinted as being a couple, and I feel like it would be nice to have two happy, and GOOD characters get together, Then if you use the idea, I feel like it would REALLY push Rhonda to the limits of what's more important to her, ratings or someones happiness.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Diamonique - Zipporah: I feel like both of these characters would really thrive by interacting together. Starting with a number of one-liners between the two, because that's where the two tropes thrive. And then later on, have them develope a friendship. I think it would be really cute, and nice growing moment for the pair.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Weston - Vance: While I don't think that Weston will interact with many people until Easton is out of the picture, but IF he does. I would love to see a friendship with Vance. I feel like Vance is really caring, and I would like to see him take care of Weston, and then maybe Easton gets jealous?

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Seraphina - Ness: Serphina seeing into the future and trying to stop all of the bad things from happening to Ness would be really neat. But no matter how hard she tries, they still end up happening, and it drives Sera crazy, and Ness tries to tell her it's alright.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Cynthia - Lita: Based on Lita's fear I think this is self-explanitory.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">I don't really want to give so many ideas, because I know that you have some of your own, but these are some that I think would be nice to see play out, or help give some of the lesser characters some plot power.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">As a whole, this story is great! Please keep going, because I really want to see what happens, and if I'm right about some of the things. At this MOMENT if I had to pick who I thought would win, I would go with Vance. No particular reasoning, but I don't think any of the WHO? Characters will win, the twins won't, a ditz can't so out of everyon I think he's the most likely. Z a c A tt a c k     Rawr 13:22, October 25, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Eeeeee! I'm so excited/thankful to see a first comment on Chapter 1 <3 I don't mind if you (or anyone) has their own little section, since it looks like it leads to long, personal comments. So this corner is offically yours ;)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">I'm so glad you liked the focus on the host! I think part of the reason Rhonda has a focus is because this story was originally meant to be a sequel to WTH, so Rhonda was going through a change now that she had hosted before. Also in UMV, part of the story was similar with Rhonda and crew trying to win a contest by getting ratings. So I kind of merged the ideas. I also feel like because Rhonda is still a kid (legally an adult but not that old) she still has room to grow and develop as a person. I wasn't entirely sure where I was going with this storyline, but I think you've given me a few good ideas...

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">And you're right; the exact location hasn't been mentioned yet besides vaguely taking place in Washington. Where the contestants will stay will be revealed next chapter. I don't know if I mentioned an abanoned location, but you'll see... The choice of Washington was a bit of a complicated reason (scrapped original plans/story reasons) but the in-story reason of being the American season/cheap is what I'm going with now. But to answer your question, it will have an effect on the story....kind of. There will be some issues that will be tackled that are very American related which is partially why there is an American focus. (And yeah, I did tarnish it, but isn't taking something from another culture and branding it our own what America does best :p).

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">And I see your point right away about the introduction. I wanted to go for an Island feel, where we meet everyone...they talked a bit and then we went on to the next. But yeah, a lot of people become WHO? which I hope will lessen in time...

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">I think the biggest issue I had writing this was simply length. Some scenes were cut simply for time (Griswold/Seraphina and Ignacio/Frannie/Diamonique had scenes I made later...) because I didn't want to alienate readers with length. So some characters who didn't show up til late (Lita, Riley, Pascal) get more screentime next chapter and the opposite for early characters (Bethany, Xidorn). I think your warning is a fine one, and I do need to be weary of just maing them joke spitting machinces. I wanted to try and do an 'ensemble' story this time, focused on more characters dramtically and comedically and there interactions. So I might need to fix this.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">And I'm so glad you read the character pages! I was trying to foreshadow most of the characters plot through their bios; I know a lot of people don't put thought in those but I feel they're important to establish a character. So I'm glad those helped!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">As for characters;

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Weston- Yeah, Weston is a slow guy. I felt like Weston could've been a who guy/not stand out from his brother, so the fact that you do love him makes me giddy! Not sure what to say about him, other than I think you'll like what I have planned for him ;)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Cynthia- Hahaha. I thought it was funny you got that impression, and a nightmare. I think I'd agree with you that she is the most 'Rhonda' character. I felt because the story was WTH, most of those characters needed to be wacky, but these guys not so much. You'll just have to see what's up with her...

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Vance- Vance just ended up being a barrel of laughs to me. I'm glad you enjoyed him! (though I question what you have against horses :p) His whistling might be my favorite joke.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Ignacio- I'm glad I surprised you with it! I wanted to try and do something different with the hot guy character, since it tends to play out very similar. We'll find out more about him soon...

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Melissa- Melissa would love to bake you snickerdoodles <3 Hehe, I look forward to seeing what you think of some of the future stuff she does. And as for Aiden/Melissa, I wouldn't put it past me ;)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Aiden- Haha! I'm super excited to here he moved your syrup beating heart xD And I would agree with you in that he seems younger (he was slightly based off of Opie Taylor from the Andy Griffith Show). And most of the American stuff that happens in the story is in relation to Aiden, so if we have any confusing stuff he'll be there to explain it. Since we have a lot of users not from the states and I hate stereotypical 'xenophobic' American characters, I tried to make him not be against foreignors too, so maybe that's why you like him.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Seraphina- Seraphina was a bit of a WHO? but I think that's because she's anti-social. But I'm glad you enjoyed her shade; I've felt I had issues writing snarky characters, so I'm glad she came off well. As for her psychic powers, she'll certainly use them...

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Ness- I'm sure Ness would enjoy a cute guy sharing clothes with her xD And I'm glad she has some sympathy.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Lita- Lita being the last to arrive really didn't give her a lot of focus. A bit shocked it sounds like you wouldn't care for her, but I can't say more than uh...we'll see more of her next time...

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Jasper- Hooray for Jasper! The only character who works as a WHO?

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Frannie- Glad you liked Frannie's intro, I was worried it was too wordy. And she's certainly a very 'Rhonda' character.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Zipporah- Her late intro, along with just kind of hating people, is why she didn't speak a lot. But I understand the iffyness. I agree that goths are complicated in stories (her label as the 'token' goth is a bit of play on how those characters appear so often). She is very similar to Ennui and Crimson, which worried me a little..

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Pascal- Yeah, Pascal bored me here too. He has some more interesting parts of him I hope to show but here...eh.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Tessa- Tessa isn't really likable, so I think that's a pretty accurate statement of her.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Diamonique- XD I love that she messed up your typical rankings. She's very fun to write for, though I worried her intro wasn't funny, so glad it was. As for her story...well another you'll see.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Easton- I do find it iffy when you have characters related, but it also makes for an easy plot...not that I would do that :p I do feel I get your hate for him (along with love for Weston).

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Riley- Yeah that was Riley pretty much, again do to about to hit my word limit. Don't know if it was intentional or a typo, but you used 'he' instead of 'she' :p

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Griswold- A bit surprised he's a who, since he did have some lines here or there but wasn't a big focus so I understand.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Hayden- I feel awful for him because he really didn't get focus D:

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Kalino- Yeah.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Xidorn- Yeah.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Bethany- Wow, wasn't expecting this O-o I did feel she was generic and worried about that, but wasn't expecting her to be hated. Part of why she talked a lot was because she was early and an athlete, which gave her a lot to talk with people. But I could see how her focus could irk you (I cheated a bit, and cut some of her dialouge/gave it to other people after seeing this comment...know that's bad, but no one else has read so...). I couldn't establish her family issues too well I felt since this is a first meeting (though I will, and did add a line about it when I cut some of her other lines...). So was it that she had so many lines that made you dislike her? Or were they just not very good lines? She'll need some work...

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Overall I appreciate the feeback on the various characters <3 And glad to hear who worked and who didn't! I feel like I can't say a lot about them till more happens (I really just want to blurt out what will happen). As for you interactions, I could see a lot of them/maybe already planned them...but again, can't say. I think some do need to happen at point though (and I may totally steal that Rhonda idea...)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">I'm so happy you like the story! Interesting winner idea right now...can't comment on that. I will say that it's not unusual for Total Drama to have ditz or crazy winners ;) Thank you so much Zac, you're such a good twin to me <3  What could possibly go wrong?  18:50, October 25, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">(2) ... Ok I want to start with, WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU STOP THE CHAPTER THERE! YOU SHOULD HAVE POSTED THE NEW CHAPTER SO I WASNT LEFT AT A CLIFF HANGER YOU HATE ME DONT YOU!!!! I THOUGHT THAT WE WERE TWINS.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Anyways... moving on. Let's go to the setting? Is the Pentagram the actual settting for the ENTIRE? show. I just had a weird feeling that it would be only for a little while, and so I was confused when the girls were talking about rotating the beds and such... But if it IS the actual setting I am super excited! Mostly because it is just so strange.... And I feel like the ~Spooky~ setting will really lead to some SUPER scenes. For example;

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Weston: He could get super afraid of something in his room, and so he starts to scream. Easton comes to the rescue, racing out of his room, but without a key, he can't get in - and so Weston is on his own :( And needs to deal with whatever it is on his own!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Lita: I mean you're staying in a horror-filled hotel. I think it's realistic-ish, for there to be a killer. (After all, Rhonda never captured the stampede she let out during the challenge) I think it would be nice to see the chainsaw maniac show back up, maybe he's taking a bubble in the tub in Lita's room, the chainsaw casually resting on the side. She walks in, and they stare at each other briefly. Since Ness is in the bedroom, the door could be jinxed and won't open when Lita tries to escape. Thus giving the chainsaw killer enough time to get out of the tub, and dressed. (Of course, Cynthia would save the day!)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Zipphora?: This is her? sanctuary. There is SO much that she could do here, I am actually really excited, and doubt I need to give you any ideas for her, in relation to the setting.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Seeraphina: Same boat! Literally so many options! Talking to the ~dead~, whatever you feel like!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">And not just characters! I think it would be interesting to see the actual setting used more. It's SO unique, and fun. Plus the fact that it might be ~changing~ because of the renovations is really interesting, maybe the campers have a hard time sleeping due to construction at weird hours.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">For now, we're moving BACK to the bus ride. I really think you managed to really use this part of the story well. It showcased the characters who were mentioned enough to really help solidify who they were, for me anyways. Starting at this point, I have a burning hatred for Tessa, she is everything that is wrong in the world, but I would LOVE to have her on After The Drama, if I ever continue it again...

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">The whole Melissa and Aiden thing was kinda cute? meh, I'm much more interested in Cynthia/Melissa than the possible couple? I don't why, but I just think they're much more interesting. Likewise, I'm interested in the bromance with Aiden and Hayden? So maybe keep the couple around and tell their story over time...

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">MY FAVOURITE part of the bus ride though, which I kinda hate you for, but love you for because you flip it later on, is the Diamonique and Chuckles the Clown story! (I don't actually remember her name oopps) The whole fight scene between them over Iggy (I can't spell his name) was AMAZING! And I can just picture Iggy's face during the entire thing! I loved their interactions, and I am oddly STOKED to see how they work as not only roommates, but besties!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">An Honourable mention to the only thing Griswold did this chapter where he had that....amazing chat with Seraphina.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Let's go to confessional usage? I love the actual format of it, it's nice and crisp so WOO! Plus the setting of it is great! I'm actually really stressed out, because I KNOW during someones confessional, that elevator is going to move, or it's going to break and fall to the ground, or SOMETHING is going to happen, so I secretly hope Weston never has a confessional. As for the actual confessionals, they're funny, and I love them! So keep them up. On a side note, I'm assuming Ness had a confessional near the end of the chapter, but it's not formatted as such, likewise in her following sentence she is missing the word "me". OMG AND JASPER. I love him so much, but It's so heartbreaking to have his confessional cut off like that, I can see it being a commercial break just as it starts.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"> Let's move on to the useless person, who I can't see being useless for much longer, but until then he's useless (maybe it has to do with his archetype?) I mean, he found what I am assuming is an immunity idol? And forawhile I was SO HAPPY I was like, well man, he's going to be the reason Pascal goes home. Because pascal made this alliance, where he was using Kalino as a scapegoat, but then he saves himself so Pascal goes home. But then that doesn't happen because of the whole team situation.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"> OH LORD. So I literally JUST noticed, as in I clicked on Riley's page wondering who HE was because he is staying with Weston, and onmy little notepad I have they are sleeping together. So imagine my surprise when HE becomes a SHE. Either I have 100% been blind and have not noticed this or... I don't even know how I managed to muck that up. But that just makes them rooming together all the better! Like the pair could be really.... interesting, both take after their ~older~ sibling (I liked to think Weston is younger by a bit). But for that to happen Weston needs something to change, because I think he might be TOO stubborn or childish, or needy to do anything without Easton.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Speaking of Easton... OMG VANCE IS SUCH A PLAYER I DID NOT SEE THAT COMING. but I love it! That whole conversation was amazing, and I just picture Easton awkwardly waking up to a bunch of fan girls passed out in the room, cuddling Vance, with some wearing his flannely shirts, or his cow boy hat etc. But then it turns out that Vance isn't actually there because the fan girls were too crazy for him.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"> I keep jumping around I'm so sorry! But I'm just crossing things off of my list of things to talk about! I want to quickly mention the whole Ness/Lita/Sera VS Tessa thing. OMG I loved when Ness said "Super Bed" She's adorable and I REALLY HOPE that she and Weston get to interact at some point, because I can just see those two being so awkward and amazing.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"> IGGY AND LITA. Oh lord this made me like both characters a little bit more. I feel like it really showcased how sad Iggy is as a person, he just wants a real friend. And I really hope he finds one! Maybe Riley? I feel like Riley would be the perfect companion. She can't get jealous, and she won't try to grope him at every oppurtunity. Back to the point, Lita slayed that interaction!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"> ERRRR MAH GOD. The challenge was amazing, and I loved the idea behind it. I know you really like to keep your chapters a fair legnth, but I would have liked to see a little bit more of the challenge! It was really fun, and I feel like you could have had 1 or two more interactions tucked in there.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"> Speaking of, Diamonique is a queen, it's official. I think that scene would have been EVEN better if she stuck Rhonda with the bill for the taxi, saying she lost her wallet or something. And then just have Rhonda just face palm. (Also you said the Eagles won, but I have no clue who the Eagles are, the teams were mentioned like once in the entire chapter D: Maybe have a quick recap?)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"> I'm going to do rankings here again :3 Just until the first elimination so they are in order of fav to least fav :3

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Weston - The Younger Twin-  Ok. So this is a Zactastic character, I love him. I want to pinch his cheeks and make him smile. Everything about him is amazing to me; he's kinda funny, I pity him, and he has a lot of mystery going for him! As whole he is definately my fav, but if he keeps up the whole not doing too much asides being adorable thing, there are a number of characters who could pass him.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Aiden - The American Patriot- I love Aiden. He's just really interesting for me. I like his bromance, and I like his possible romance. i feel like he has a lot going for him, but I hope he doesn't go to the final fourish? Like I feel he would be a shocking merge elimination. And it fits the character in my opinion. SIDE NOTE: Was he always a hunk? Or did that happen after Lil'Red drew him? For some reason i thought he was dweeby looking.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Ignacio- Mr. Fanservice- He's definately fanservice, but only because it's adorable to see him get flustered! Literally that's my fav thing about him, he's hot? So what. His interactions with the girls is top-notch, and I find it really funny, and different! (A nice play on the usual girl sexism)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Jasper - Some Nobody- i don't know WHY he is so high. because He hasn't done anything. But he is my fourth favourite character in your story. There is just something about him that makes me love him, and I want to write a one-shot all about Jasper, to make up for how the producers of this show always forget about him! #Jasper4theWin

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Vance - The Rodeo Champ- This is the ONLY sotry where I have 5 guys in my top five, usually it's dominated by females. So way to go Rhonda? As for Vance, he was amazing last chapter! And he's still super amazing, he wasn't shown as much this time, but when he was, he really took over the scene, in a good way! I'm curious to see where you go with him!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Ness - The Jinx- She's adorable! Her super-bed comment pushed her into my top 6. I'm not going to lie. Her tripping over what I can only assume was a LUCKY penny, amazing! And then the whole Bethany  saving her? I'm in love.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Melissa - The Sweetheart- Melissa is such a happy character surrounded by such strange people. I am really excited to see why she wants to be around Cynthia so much. And if Cynthia ends up opening up to her... if not I am still rooting for her relationship with Aiden, but like I said before I hope it drags out a little more.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Cynthia- The Sociopath- Easily a top character, but she's surrounded by other AMAZING characters. She doesn't say anything, but she doesn't need to. We all know she plans on slowly killing each of the campers until she's the last one standing... That or she's just really shy.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Diamonique- The Ditz- I hated her last chapter. I kinda really enjoy her this time around. The choice to have her interact with iggy was a good one, and I'm really looking forward to see just what other ~strings~ she can pull. Plus how will living with Iggy affect her?

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Zipporah - The Token Goth- I really enjoy her? His (I don't know after the Riley situation, and I'm too lazy to click on the link.) lines, they only briefly appear, but when they shed a tear after hearing the story of the Pentagram hotel I knew I would love them! I do hope however they make more appearances, even if it's just in the background doing strange goth things.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Easton- The Older Twin- I don't hate him as much as I did before. That being said, he's an awkward Taco! I really want to see him and Vance interact some more because it's such an off pairing! Also mty favourite thing he did was sigh when he was seperated from Weston. I took it as him FINALLY being able to relax, but that may have just been me.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Hayden - The Big Brother- How much older is Hayden? Or is that just his ego kinda making him think that he's older than everyone else and that he needs to take charge and take care of them? Either way, I love egos and I lover brotherly characters, so I mean I do enjoy Hayden. I just want to see more about what he's about, and have some story put on him, instead of him being Aiden's friend.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Seraphina - The Psychic- I thought that I would love her a lot more. But her whole Pyschic thing isn't used very much? But this is only the second chapter, so lots of things can still happen! I am looking forward to seeing her future though... hehehehe.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Riley - The Bro- Who? But she's the highest of the whose because she's rooming with the Best Twin.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Frannie- The Circus Act- Who? Asides from being a clown, and rooming with Diamonique.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Griswold- The Lineman- An actual who? Like You did one funny one-liner convo.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Kalino- The Slacker- Literally useless.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Xidorn - The Straight Shooter- Who? I don't actually know who you are.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Lita- The Knockout- Oh lordy lord. Being ranked beneath a WHO? Character is never a good thing. Lita should be an amazing character. She's funny, but she is being used SO MUCH. That I am sick of her. On top of that, I don't see how she's a knockout. No character mentioned her looking attractive this chapter, and instead we faced this angry hulk-like Character.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Pascal- The Pop Star- He's the most annouying character you have and I hope he goes home soon. I thought I would like him, I really did, I mean, he HAS an ego, But I can't deal with him. I get a taste of pink vomit whenever he speaks.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Bethany - The All Star- She would have been ranked who? if it weren't for all the hate I felt for her in the last chapter. She turned invisible this time around. I will say I LIKED when she saved Ness. And i think that is the first time I've ever liked Bethany.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Tessa - The Big Shot- I don't need to talk about Tessa do I? She's just no. Just no.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"> Quick note, I think you are doing much better at the screen time thing! I got a much better feel for who people were this time. I will say however you seem to keep rotating stories around the same characters; Pascal, Melissa, Aiden, Lita/Bethany and  Seraphina. I mean it's only Chapter 2, so i Have no clue what you're planning. I just think you should be on the watch for that a little more, because it's turning me off some of the ~bigger~ personalities like Lita and Bethany and Pascal, who in theory should be very highly-rated characters.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"> As for my first-out prediction I have to say Easton. (Although it could easily be Tessa, Lita, Bethany or Pascal. all of which would make me very, very happy.) I say Easton because I predict that the final challenge will be Easton Vs Weston, and whoever wins, will win the challenge. Easton is beating Weston, but then he throws the challenge, realizing how peaceful his life can be if he doesn't have to be around Weston for the entire Summer. Since he lost the challenge, his team would eliminate him... I look forward to reading it though! The story is GREAT so far! Z a c A tt a c k     Rawr 12:19, November 7, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"> (I'm going to comment on this one first cause I read it first but didn't have time to comment D:) <3 Eee I was so excited to see this comment this morning, thanks Zac <3

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">I'm glad you liked the cliffhanger <3 Originally it was going to end right before Rhonda announced the rest of the challenge, but I needed more room next chapter so I added the start of the challenge to this one next.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">The contestants will be staying at the Pentagram for the duration of their stay of the show, though challenges might take place in Washington in general. I'm hoping the setting will lead to some fun (I enjoy haunted places <3)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Your ideas are all super great and I'm going to have to steal some of them :3 I'm glad the bus ride was enjoyable as well. This chapter I tried to focus on some of the characters who showed up less/make it more balanced...it sounds like with mixed results.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Tessa is not meant to be a likable character, so yay that's working though I hope its not alienating you from reading. She is meant to represent an attitude I see in actual people.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">XD I can see why Cynthia and Melissa would be more interesting, those two seem to have very different personalities while Aiden and Melissa have somewhat similar personalities. And I'm glad the bromance between Aiden and Hayden was also well-recieved.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">And Ignacio's scene with Diamonique and Frannie maybe the best scene of the chapter I thought, so I'm glad you enjoyed it <3 (Also I can't spell Iggy's name at all, I have to grammar check it so you're not alone :p)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Sadly Gris just hasn't blossmed yet I guess, though I enjoyed this converstation between him and Seraphina. I'm not sure if you did, or if that amazing is sarcastic because of the '...' though.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Glad the confessional worked <3 I was a bit worried the format wouldn't make sense but I'm glad it did (I think I may have got the idea from Return of the Rejects). They're all fun to write (and convient to get across at times). As for the use of an elevator well... ;)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"> I'll be straight up that any errors you notice with confessionals are because of formatting; I have to copy and paste my stories from Word then spend an hour or so in source mode deleting lines of text that mess it up because its different (not sure if that makes any sense). Crossed out names and confessionals are usually messed up with it :p But thank you for pointing out that Ness error <3

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Jasper appreciates the love so much <3 Thank you!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">You were spot on about the idol bussiness. The alliance scene was for to establish characteristics about Pascal (and other reasons I won't expand on because...plot). Kalino's storyline is hard to explain but chapter four might expand on it.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">XD I had noticed you had been referring to Riley as a 'he'. I like them as roommates (never noticed but they do take after their older siblings) so we'll see how that happens.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">And xD I thought it mentioned in Vance's bio that he flirts with a lot of girls. It was a very funny moment to write.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">OMG, Weston and Ness should interact <3 So glad that Ness is liked <3 I'm curious to see what your feelings are on the three of the girls together...

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Igancio and Lita's scene has been planned for years actually; I forgot about it till I stumbled through it on some old notes and decided to add it back in. And now I've developed a scene idea between Riley and Igancio :p

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">I'm glad you enjoyed the challenge idea! There was a bit scene between Hayden and Kalino there but I feel it didn't add anything (you would've hated how pointless it was) so it was cut :3 I wish I did do more but yeah, chapter length...

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">And hooray for Diamonique being a queen! xD that would've been a hilarious additon. You have a fair point about the teams; maybe I should have listed their names again (I was worried about length but if its unclear...)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">While I know it doesn't stay this way, I'm proud that I had five males make the top five <3 Aiden was always hunky (he has a baseball player build in my head, since that's the all american sport). What I love about Reddy's image (besides those tears <3) is that he seems shorter because I think he's one of the younger contestants.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"># Joaquin Jasper4TheWin

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Omg, I didn't even think of that, but that would've been a lucky penny xD And Zipporah is a female :p Woah, Easton is higher? That might be my best plot twist yet :3 And Hayden is the only character offically graduated from high school, so he's a year or two older than most of the others but that's not a lot...

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">I enjoyed that Seraphina pun <3 I may not have been conveying this well but...Seraphina has some hang ups about her pyschic powers (why she's reluctant to admit her cards are tarot cards and turns away when Griswold mentions them). They'll be adressed (and used) in chapter 4 though <3

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">I'm sorry Lita is so down D: xD I hardly used her last chapter and now I've used her too much. I do hope you don't end up hating her like Bethany, since she does have a more well-developed personality which is why I didn't feel to bad about it (TD does it sometimes I feel like). She honestly just got more focus because I felt I needed to set up certain points before the story got to along. Maybe I could've postponed it though, and I'll try to balance her better in the future.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">The pink vomit comment is accurate <3 Similar to Lita, Pascal has to move some plot points but he will certainly have a downgraded role coming chapter 4. Yeah, since Bethany got so much focus last I felt as a trade off she got less this chapter.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">I'm glad the focus was better :D My goal for next chapter is to list the characters who didn't get spotlight and let them have it. And your first out prediction is interesting ;) So glad you enjoyed the chapter and thank you so much for reading <3  What could possibly go wrong?  05:19, November 8, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"> (3) 

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">''' BEFORE I get into the chapter. I thought it would be nice to go over something that I really, really enjoyed this chapter. And that was the fact that you had split the premiere into 3. I feel like it helped showcase the entire cast to some degree, which really helped with the ~first out~ problem. That bein said, I feel you could have worked on the first out a little bit more? Bethany Bailey? IDK her name anymore. She was really focused in the first chapter, which made it seem like she was going home, but then she became invisible in the second chapter, I don't know if I would have done that. And then in the THIRD chapter she became the obvious first boot due to the family scene, and the other team voting. '''

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">''' As for what I think would have helped the elimination? First get rid of that scene where she is all mushy about her family. I understand you made a similiar scene for both Hayden and Cynthia, but none of those felt like HEY this character is about to go home, like Bailey's did. Maybe had you given Hayden a sob story, or given Pascal a scene where he actually tried to save Bethany it would have helped to atleast put the weight of elimination on the two, rather than just Bethany. But that's just an opinion. I honestly had no idea for what kind of story you could have told with her, asides a rival to Tessa, and some cutesy(?) scenes with Ness. So I am GLAD she is the first out, not only because she's my least fav! '''

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">''' AS FOR THIS WHOLE BAILEY SITUATION. I honestly have no idea why, but you called Bethany Bailey 3 times in the chapter. Twice in a row, and then once right after you called her Bethany... This is what happens when you don't sleep like a good twin would! <3 '''

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">''' I want to talk about the teams quickly. I don't know who is on which team, like at all. Due to the whole roommate thing, where people aren't sleeping with their teammates in all the cases, but in some they are. And then the whole challenge didn't really showcase each team, atleast for me. When I read the challenge, I saw it more of X VS Y, not Eagles VS Fireworks. But maybe that's just me? I hope that maybe in the next chapter we can get some solid team building sessions, like towards the end of this chapter to kinda showcase the teams more. '''

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">As a whole, I really enjoyed the challenge though! I think I would have preferred it maybe in a chapter or two, where I could have had more of an idea who was on each team, but no biggie. What I really liked was the tie-in to the second chapter, and having them have a chance of knowing what was the next task. I think almost all of the tasks were really enjoyable as a whole! And the slip and slide maze, made me laugh... plus that throwback to the cab thing in the previous chapter! But seriously why do these people carry money with them? Also I NEED a one-shot on what was happening inside that taxi!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">But moving back to the first part of the chapter.... Seraphina doesn't like people? I honestly had no idea, until she said so. I feel like I have no idea who Seraphina is supposed to be at this point. Is SHE a pyschic? Like at all? Because if so I don't think it's really being mentioned, instead she's just an anti-social person- which is fine! Again, I feel like her task, the speech one was really awkward. Both teams spoke like they had been a team for ages, and when they spoke you set the teams up, as good vs lost, but I couldn't connect the ideas to the teams, until the challenges actually started to happen.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">NO I WAS WRONG! Well, I never really thought that Easton would be the first out, but I would have LOVED him to have been, it could have opened up a lot more room for Weston ;3 Oh well. Speaking of, I thought that it was EXTRA confusing that you chose to have Vance be the one to "pick" on Weston after he cheered for his brother. ONLY because Easton is Vance's roommate and I just got confused, because I don't know the teams very well and assumed Vance was on the other team. But that's likely just me being dumb.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Let's talk about Vance quickly. Because before I continue to put him near the top of my rankings, I need to know. IS HE A JERK? Like I don't know if he's supposed to be really mean, or not because he's been super nice sometimes but mean other times, and I'm just lost on my feelings. Also theory time, Vance isn't a cowboy at all, and only pretends he is for the chicks... Which kinda makes me like him, a lot (all that ego <3). Also his sexist comments made me so happy-- when he got beat by a girl.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Diamonique... Oh lord. I love her sassy attitude, do I love that she's a genious? Not really. I think that the idea is starting to get used a little bit more often. That being said, I'm sure you have a twist planned for it. But I do enjoy the fact that she refuses to put in the effort to be smart!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">The Easton and Ness situation was adorable. I love how he just failed at life, since he is the lesser twin, it makes sense. But NESS slayed the scene. When she revealed she knew that it was going to happen I was laughing out loud. She is amazing!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">The person who MADE this chapter for me, was Ziphora. Shocker? I'm not sure. I love her one-liners EVERYWHERE. Like I can picture her goth-walking up by people, like Ness and Easton saying her line and leaving. Her lines about Cynthia were AMAZING. Everythign she did this chapter was A+. THIS is a good Ziphora.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Oh Iggy... Since I can't spell your name. I LOVED his scene. And by scene I do mean, scene, he was never seen again after it. I loved how he always ends up forced into being shirtless, and it's a really good running gag. In regareds to the reactions, they killed me. Rhonda making puddles <3 Hayden and EASTON? Might be gay, if so I may need to rethink my stance on the lesser twin. Because I think that that would be adorable.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">You know what my FAVOURITE "Cute" scene was this chapter? And I mean you won't guess so I'll just tell you. When Cynthia murdered the snakes, and was covered in blood, I loved her little nod to Melissa when she said that she was going to clean her up when they get back to the hotel. Cynthia is adorable- and I never thought that I would say that. I have confessional written beside this? So I'm assuming you missed a formatting on a confessional.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">The Ness challenge with Frannie made me immensely happy. I can just imagine everyone watching that and being like WHAT just happened, over and over again. I love how it was 13 times too. Everything about Ness was adorable <3 Frannie just saying "Do you want a do over" was amazing <3

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">"Brotato Chip"

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">CYNTHIA and Melissa have one of my favourite connections, even if it's just wtf all the time. I like how she talks to Melissa now, it's super cute!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">As a whole, the fireworks make me so happy! I just love their team dynamics, which is odd because they have more of my lesser-liked characters, but power to them!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">IF Melissa went home. I would have murdered Tessa. NO ONE pulls on the SAINTS HAIR and gets away with it! I am HOPING that Cynthia pays Tessa a visit shortly, as a form of payback for Melissa.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">I THINK that's everything that happened? I'm not really sure any more. I do have character rankings, but they will be in their own seperate blog, with all the others. So my comments will be shorter from here on out. I do think that I'll continue to drop some interaction ideas though :3 Because it's really fun to make them!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Westhia - I just think it would be amazing to see Cynthia have to look after Weston for any given amount of time. I got this idea after her fainted on her. I don't know how it would work, or WHY it would happen, but I just think that the scene would be gold!

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Vimonique - I feel like Vance is leaning to the jerk charadter spectrum. If that's the case, him being a playa playa, he would want to try and date a girl. After reviewing the girls on his team, the only option is Diamonique. Not that I think she would fall for his charms, but I feel like the pair could be interesting.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Iggyton/Hayton- I feel like Easton is gay. I've decided. So i feel like either him slowly flirting with Iggy, but so subtly that Iggy doesn't realize, he's just happy that someone isn't usign him for his looks for once, and then they have some random scene where the lesser twin makes a move.... Or likewise, Hayden and Easton where they have a bromance... that goes one step further, and they both have a panic attack when it happens, and stop talking. Only to reconsole later on.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">Grisley - I WANT Riley and Griswold to do more. They both seem like they could be very interesting characters, but don't do anything. I LIKED whent hey had the party in chapter 2. So I want to see more of that, maybe Riley throws a party in her room, or they're hitting the gym, or something. I just think these two have more chemistry together than with the other members of the team.

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;">WELL That's all for now <3 Can't wait for Chapter 4!! Z a c A tt a c k     Rawr 21:58, November 7, 2015 (UTC)

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMMENTING ON BOTH CHAPTERS TODAY ZAC <3 AND RANKINGS! YOU ARE TOO GOOD A TWIN TO ME!

I'm so glad you liked the the split into three premire <3 Apparently it confused a lot of people, but I enjoyed it for the reasons you said

I agree Bethany could've been developed a lot better. Part of it was because she was always concieved as an early out from the start. I think we have different opinions of early outs/first outs xD To me most first outs are an obviously annoying or disliked character who doesn't get a lot of screentime (Zeke, Beardo, B/G in TDA and Staci, though those last two did have fair screentime in hindsight) or in fics Lizza, Ed/Lacey/Mariana, York, Lancelot and even my own Collin :p

In that sense, I tried to conceive Bethany as an opposite; she was well-liked and friendly. I felt in TDWTH my early outs were so obvious so I wanted to try a different approach...and instead made it obvious :p Oops. At least it was a learning experience.

To make a long story short (too late), I think my own want for a not obvious early out/first out probably prevented her from getting a true story feel which hurt her. I also felt she didn't come across as a the sort of friendly, well-adjusted girl I who has a competitive nature due to her family heritage. Overall, I don't hate Bailey but I do wish I handled/wrote her better.

Also while on the subject, you've noticed that Bailey/Bethany thing; the reason is that I wrote these three chapters in advance (though with some editing, especially thanks to your fab comments <3), even before I returned to the wiki. Bethany's name was Bailey...till I found out it was taken. I wanted a normal sounding B-name, so Bethany it was :3 Except I actually don't like that name for her :/ So those Baileys were instances I forgot to change her name to Bethany.

As for Bethany, yeah that mushy scene was probably unneeded. I thought making it look like she had plot might've changed people's minds...but I guess it made it more obvious (maybe I'll change some things...) As for storylines, I have some in mind I could've have but they'd be spoilery :3

The Team situation is a problem and hopefully will be better addressed next challenge (I actually have Rhonda making it a point in the chapter). I'm glad you liked the challenge though! I did here since the teams would have even numbers and it would showcase everyone (though some challenges had scenes cut) but it probably could've used a push back. Super glad the tie-in about Rhonda's speech worked <3 And maybe I will deliver a one-shot ;) [maybe as a secret scene?]

Seraphina's original label was the Cynical Psychic, but I cut the Cynical part because it felt unneeded. I give her that 'cyncial, people suck' personality but idk maybe I did a bad job at it (its why she's bitchy at first). Hopefully that'll show more next time.

The speechs were awkward. I see it as more them talking up their teams to get votes and dealing with personalities; Xidorn just feels his team is awesome so he's going to speak up about it while Seraphina is just trying to sell her team as interesting for the ratings (she honestly hasn't seen stategy or flirting or many fights on her team). But I might add some lines to make that clearer...

And...yeah Vance is a jerk xD I thought most of his lines were condescending or cocky but idk. And you're on a bit about faking being a cowboy ;) His bio makes it a bit clearer on both these points but I'll elaborate on the last one.

For me, 'country people' can be divided into different terms. You have the 'country people' who work on farms or live in rural towns/villages, cowboys who may work on farms but usually ranches and live in the midwest and then 'rednecks', trailer park people in the south. Vance is a redneck trying to be a cowboy/country person.

Hmm, Diamonique's intelligence will be explored more and where she falls... Her label wasn't meant to be the Ditz intially but nothing fit so it was settled on (any other ideas that fit her are welcome). And hooray for Ness and Easton doing amazing. I'm just glad Ness is loved <3

Wow, I wasn't expecting the Zipporah love xD (Toad loves her but he loves the Goths in RR) Her in the art scene maybe my favorite thing ever. So I'm so glad she made it (and her confessional about Cynthia was actually inspired from wanting to cut lines based a comment you said ;D)

Iggy is very shy so he didn't get a lot of scenes (though if things work out, he'll have two scenes next chapter...). Iggy did have a scene where his swimsuit got undone...but it had some issues and was cut D': I'm glad you enjoyed the reactions! Hayden is canonally gay (his bio mentions his bf). Easton's reaction was just that Iggy is so hot even guys want him... though maybe he is gay. We'll have to see :p

Cynthia and Melissa are super cute together <3 Ness' challenge was very funny; it had some other gags that were cut for time as well D: But I enjoyed it and the thirteen times were intentional.

What flavor of Brotato Chip are you? Bro-B-Q or Sour Cream and Bronion?

xD not surprised the fireworks dynamics are more enjoyed; they're the more dsyfunctional team.

I appreicate the character rankings you did Zac <3 I will have to give them my own seperate comment soon but I'm so thankful to have character rankings (and I've secretly always wanted Zactastic Character Rankings).

As for your interactions, they are fun and I want to do them all...though I don't always have time. Though I can confirm some of them are planned for in the future ;) I'm so grateful you like the story and want more! Thanks again twin ;3  What could possibly go wrong?  06:44, November 8, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">(4)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">FIRST I AM SO SORRY THAT THIS TOOK SO LONG. I had mid terms and a bunch of things to attend to! BUT IM READING NOW. IM A BAD TWIN IM SORRY

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Now onto the chapter... I am not a person who swears, but on my little note pad I have "Holy Fuck" written atleast 7 times. This was a GREAT chapter, with lots of twisting points! It was queit the wild ride! But let's start at the begining.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Melissa is perhaps one of the more adorable characters in this story. I was giggling as I pictured her skipping through a dungeon, and a "meat locker" reading a baking cook book. The entire scene helped build up more of the mystery of the hotel, but also build Melissa up as such a sweet and happy character, which really helps on the holy Fuck moments later on in the chapter... I also really like how Cynthia (and Aiden >_>) both came to Melissa's aid to give the baked goods to the rest of the city. And Griswold swimming in the baked goods was <3

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Xidorn! Oh lord if he dyes his hair every single time one of his friends goes home I'd be so stoked! I can just see him having rainbow-coloured hair at some point, showing his bagage. I think that it would be a really cute tribute, and it helps me root for him. This is the first chapter where I can see who Xidorn is, and I am liking him a lot so far! I hope that as a character he doesn't change too much. He had a few scenes with Sera, to be honest I'm not a big fan of the pair together, they just don't seem to work well with each other.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">PUPCAKES. I want some right now! Do you think that Melissa delivers? I felt so bad for Ness when she had the allergic reaction she's just such a mess, but she's so adorable so I can't really blame her! The fact that a horse ran her over in the ambulance is A+ material. I like to think it was Vance's horse!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Hayden is very quickly shooting up my rankings! He is just so BAE worthy. Like I need a Hayden in my life. Someone to take care of me, and carry me places because I'm too lazy to walk there myself. Someone to look after me <3 Hayden is MINE NO ONE ELSE IS ALLOWED TO TOUCH HIM.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">The chase scene was <33333333. I think it really showcased the friendship between Frannie and Diamoniqiqieieu the best, out of all of their scenes. Which is weird since there was a "heart warming" scene later on, but I don't really think that scene was nearly as amazing as this one was. I love how they are calling him Iggy now! That's his only name to me, and I'm glad I'm not alone! We can start an Iggy fan club :D me and Frannie <3. Diamonique being a Blood Hound was <333 and her tracking Iggy's boar scent was great.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">ANOTHER character who has randomly become one of my faves? RILEY. Her shirtless scene with the gentleman, Iggy was AMAZING. Despite it seeming so awkward at first, it easily become one of my fac scenes in this chapter! I really feel like this is the first chapter where we are getting to know Riley (and Xidorn, and Griswold) and it just makes me so happy because they are ALL amazing characters who were overshadowed by... some annouying characters in the past chapters. (Lita, Seta and Tessa >_>)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I LOVE the drama-plot line for ratings! That's such a clever way to create some drama on the scene with very little, as well as build up the relationship between Jenny/Toby and Rhonda. Toby literally being useless unless he's being a cleevr jerk. And Jenny being savage as frick is amazing. but RHONDA taking their advice, despite her own morals? I'm surprised Seraphina didn't see this coming. I love the build up to the moment in the secret room, witht he ratings and the EYES... but the exceution was one of the biggest HOLY FUCK moments in this chapter... in fact I doubted that it would get topped... but it does.... Aiden being a complete arse to HAYDEN and MELISSA the two people who he has been so cutesy with? Not cool bro. You can leave now. AND OMG the Xidorn reveal was another moment I was just shocked. Plus Rhonda not knowing? And the co-hosts being useless as always? PERFECT. This is just so <333 i can't wait to see how Melissa and Hayden end up getting treated int he future chapters.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Except there's no pigs living inside of you" Oh Weston you're by far the cutest thing on this show (sorry Rhonda). I loved the entire Broritto scene it was just <333 on so many different levels. It showcased some of the elss known characters, but was one of my fav scenes in this chapter! I think it also had a lot of forshadowing. Riley being insecure, and Griswold having to make a choice? A choice between Lita (The Varsity jacket scene was amazing) and Riley would be so heart breaking because I feel like Lita has it in the bag, even tho she's a ho and Riley is the true Queen of this story.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I think the way you used the challenge was GREAT. it really worked to build up each of the teams and their own interactions. I think it was much needed - plus it led to some cute interactions (Ness and Seraphina slapping each other?) You pulling a Rhonda was nice <3 and It was fun to see again.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Zipphora choosing to talk to the painting over her team was great! I was worried that Tessa was going to try and become friends with her or make her an ally or something and I was very stressed. Tessa is like bad luck, if she interacts with you, you drop in my rankings.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">NESS's LUCK might be changing? She won the challenge for her team because she's amazing! I hope this is a trend for my little bad omen! She could really use the help anyways! Ont eh challenge, I THINk the better way to have ended it would have been to have Rhonda to make the reveal about Hayden/Melissa with Aiden there,a nd then Melissa runs out of the room in tears, then Aiden chases after her and so they lose the challenge as they were the last two standing- just for the extra drama. But the way you ended it was fine as well <3

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Diamonique being eliminated. EVEN if I wasn't spoiled on who was leaving I feel like she was an obvious boot. You pulled a similiar style of elimination when it came to Bethany. In her last scene before the elimination have her make a big "reveal" and then she ends up going home. I'm not a big fan of this story line for Diamonique, much like I wasn't a fan of Bethany's. They were mentioned once and then they went home. i think having Diamonique just be eliminated without the extra sob story, but have her and Frannie have a final scene would have been more powerful - and make more sense, in my perspective anyways.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">BUT THE BIGGEST HOLY FUCK MOMENT WAS THE FINAL CONFESSIONAL. Kalino out-braining the brain that is Diamonique? Ohhhh Frannie if only you knew you're the reason why she went home ;( I am very excited to see just where this master mind Kalino ends up going!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I would post more interaction suggestions, but  I'll do that when I read the next chapter, which is likely to happen tomorrow, sorry! I'll update the rankings now <33

<p style="font-weight:normal;">    Z a c  A tt a c k     Rawr 16:59, December 15, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Yay another Zactastic comment <3 Thanks for being such a good twin to me! It's fine, I understand (I've been meaning to comment more on things these past couple of weeks but my teachers are trying to teach during Xmas time :p That's just crazy! Hopefully I'll have more time with Xmas break...) Sorry if this is very rambly, I haven't had a lot of sleep and this all sounds crazy to me :p

<p style="font-weight:normal;">YAY! This chapter had a lot of plot twists and stuff in it <3 It was a lot of crazy twists so I'm glad that made it enjoyable (I was worried it'd be bad). I'm glad the twists were able to deliever their share of surprises since you did get spoiled on who went home.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Writing Melissa always makes me smile. That scene of the meat locker was just fun to come up with. Cynthia was going to be even more INV than she was this chapter (its a temporary thing :p) but I wanted a little more Melissa/Cynthia friendship feels. And I think it was Vance who swam in the cupcakes, but maybe I wrote the name wrong?

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Xidorn <3 I'm glad you've noticed Xidorn now :p And Xidorn may have very colorful hair...if he lasts that long ;) I do have more plans for him too...but I can't spoil those... You'll have to see if he and Sera have more scenes together or not (it is worth noting that this isn't there first scene together and they interest in movies was hinted in their bios...and they aren't the only ones ;p)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Melissa would be happy to deliver to a friend of mine ;) Or a person I vaguely know. Or a total stranger. In fact, she just feels awful she didn't offer sooner. She has twelve dozen on the way, it just might take some time. She's riding her enviromentally friendly, electric scooter made of recycled parts.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Ness is a hot mess (omg, I didn't even realized they ryhmed that's amazing and will be referenced in story :O). And the horse was Vance's xD It's still out there on a path of destruction, so hide yo kids.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">XDDD I was not expecting at all for you to like Hayden (I was a bit worried he was still INV). I need someone like that too Zac D: And oh gosh, you can have him xDDD Just explain that to his boyfriend.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I actually didn't think much of the chase scene, so I'm thrilled you loved it. I did not plan on Frannie and Diamonique to be friends at all originally, but I needed someone to drool over the hot guy and they were the best options...now there so connected to each other's stories XDD There use of Iggy was a reference to your use of it :p And I'd join that fan club ;3

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Riley took sometime to get some focus, but I've adored writing her all the way (her bro slang is the best joke in existance and I take so much pleasure in it :p) I'm SO glad you like her now <3 It was one of the first scenes I wrote for the chapter and was meant to give both of them more spotlight. And yay Griswold getting some love to! I'm a bit bummed that Lita and Seraphina are still annoying though I understand why, is it just because of their focus or are their personalities just rubbing you a wrong way (not worried about Tessa because she is not likable xD).

<p style="font-weight:normal;">The drama plot-line was all based on your suggestions tbh, so thank you! It's proven to be very useful in the other plots. The Rhonda, Jenny and Toby dynamic is something I really love writing and I'm so glad that you're enjoying it!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I felt Aiden's actions would be very controverstial, and I'm interested to see how you'll react to what comes from it next chapter... I had always planned for Xidorn to be pan, I've stated that in chat and hinted at in previous chapters (he's always open about wanting some Iggy ;3)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">As for the revelation for him being trans, I just love the scene of it between Jenny and Toby xD But more importantly since this is my first story in canon I wanted it to be diverse so that is set a precedent for future stories in that people of different or mixed races, different religions or relgious characters and LGBTQ characters are commonplace. I think that is why there is some focus on those last two in the story, to address it and have it accepted and we move on. It might also be do to the story taking place in America and focusing on current issues in America... I didn't intend for this story to be politic, oops :p Let's focus on Weston!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I added that line just because Weston needed more lines xD I was planning on having moments that moved Easton and Weston's stories forward this chapter but word count, so its next chapter :p And now, Weston is adorable not denying it :p

<p style="font-weight:normal;">The Broritto scene was a favoritie too, just a way to focus on more characters who needed it. xD Riley's line about puberty was more a joke than meant at hints...but it could be true :p Griswold's choice I thought was foreshadowed in the tarrot card scene (DID YOU SCENE SERAPHINA DID ACTUAL PSYCHIC SHIT?) but between Riley and Lita...interesting idea :p (I'm glad you enjoyed the variesty jacket scene!). And wow, that is some serious shade xD

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I'm glad the challenge worked, I thought it was a little stale (I meant for in the Rhonda/Toby/Jenny scene for Jenny to say "Oh yeah, we'll get the ratings with these scenes of people sitting and sleeping!") but I needed to develop more plots and have more interactions so it worked really well. And pulling a Rhonda? xD what does that mean?

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Zipporah's comment was one of my favorites <3 You did hit a nail on the head there, Zipporah is someone Tessa would talk to and you'll have to see how that plays out ;) Ness is a champion? But is her luck turning around? We'll have to see :p (SO GLAD YOU'RE STILL LOVING HER <3)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Your idea is a pretty good one I wish I considered...though a few issues with it. Part of the reason there even is a rule about leaving the area was to give a reason for Cynthia to lose without closing her eyes (I can't honestly imagine her closing them o-o) and it would feel weird if she ran after Melissa as Aiden did. And I feel like Rhonda was expecting a reaction, so doing that at the end would be her kind of 'cheating' to give the Fireworks a win and I don't know if she's crossed that boundary yet...

<p style="font-weight:normal;">The reason Kalino was last (aside from a bit of humor the slacker stays awake the longest) was a bit of foreshadowing and implications of its own...

<p style="font-weight:normal;">You bring up a really good point about Diamonique, and that is how similar her elimnation was to Bethany's, I wish I realized that because things would've been different. Part of the reason Diamonique's intelligence/brain damage part was included was to show there were some hidden depths than what just seemed like a rich airhead. Yeah, I think it could've been handled better but I will say I have plans for Diamonique...she won't be returning but this isn't the last we hear of her...But I think you're right on perspective.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">XDDDDDDDDDD I was looking forward to your reaction on this. Yes, Kalino out-brained everyone! Where Kalino goes will be...very interesting...

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I look forward to your comments on the next chapter. I am a bit worried to see your feelings, as I hadn't had a lot of feedback when I wrote it... (the rankings were wonderful <3)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Thanks SO MUCH for commenting Zac, sorry for the crazy reply :p, I really appreciate it! Hope you enjoy more in the future <3  What could possibly go wrong?  03:24, December 16, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">OK IM NOT LATE I PROMISE... You uh, just uhhhh were SUPER EARLY (5)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Ok! So it's been awhile since I've made comments so I don't know how long this will be, but I'll do my best! Let's start with the elimination? Because I mean Jasper was one of my FAVES. Like actually I loved the guy, and I am SO sad that he went home. I'm REALLY curious as to what he wanted to say, maybe it was a big secret! Or maybe it was just nonsense but still it's sad that we didnt get to hear the ONE thing Jasper wanted to say, y'know? But oh well, I do LIKE the fact that Rhonda cut him off, it's very fitting but it's just kinda sad at the same time. I like that Lita didn't vote him off, so they're going up in my rankings obviously.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Speaking of Rhonda... I am SO excited for her mini arc? The thing about the ratings is GOLD I love it! It's been causing so much drama and excitement! I love how wishy-washy Jenny is about it too! One day she's all for ruining the lives of the contestants the next she's against it! Her having the mini tantrum with Rhonda after she decided to be EVIL with Weston was amazing, and at the moment I hate you btw.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Speaking of my poor Weston! omg the twin rivalry was my fav thing this chapter! That volleyball scene, obviously wasn't fixed, but it was so SPOT on amazing. Like I could feel the intestity. On that, I was actually in tears both because of the comedy but also because i felt SO bad for Weston when he saw the television! Like WHO DOES THAT EXCEPT FOR AN EVIL TWIN >_> RHONDA! I just hope he can get rid of the lesser half soon!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Do you want to know who else was EVIL? PASCAL! While not entirely, but him quoting team Rocket just SHOWS how EVIL he is! He needs to go before he corrupts my babies! He is a bad influence that must be stopped! He is EVIL! SAVE YOURSELF NESS stop interacting with the evil thing!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">This love triangle is making me all kinds of sad! Grizzlybear NEEDS to choose Riley! I mean, she's amazing and stuff! "NO HANDS" I mean you can't get better than that! I mean YES, Lita was a pity vte for Jasper, but she's still... well she's just not Riley! Plus Lita needs to fall deeply in love with iggy! not Grizzly! I know I am REALLY behind but I would DIE if Griswald practices Dolhpin calls in the confessional before choosing which girl he likes more <3

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Seraphina is growing on me! Particulary her scene with the girls on her team, her calling them friends was heartwarming! In fact that WHOLE "party" scene was just really well done. I think it's some of your best writing. Everything about it felt "alive" which is something that is harder to do in a TD fic, so I really commend you for that!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">BACK TO EVIL PEOPLE EASTON! DONT YOU PITY HIM PEOPLE! HE IS AN EVIL HUMAN BEING WHO MUST BE STOPPED. That is all I have to say on the lesser twin.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">ANOTHER EVIL PERSON or ex-evil, Aiden! I started off hating him this chapter after his hayden hating and Melissa hating. (Might I add I was very happy that those three were not the stars this chapter, it was a nice change!) I really liked his scenes with both Hayden and Mel this chapter, I do wish though that their rivalry went a LITTLE bit longer? Or atleast one of them? I think it would have been a nice dynamic, with either Hayden trying to help Aiden apoligze to Mel or vice verse for a chapter or two. That being said, it's nice to have them all on the same page again.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Back to Hayden... and other EVIL PEOPLE! Vance your gayness is showing. But I don't mind, you go make Hayden break up with his Boo! Because I REALLY want to see some Hayce on my tele! They would be UBER hot tbh, and would have a really interesting story tbh. The closet gay who comes to terms with his feelings and then does everything he can to show Hayden that they're in love? <33

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Ziphora, I think haas solidified herself as an early boot in this chapter. She still has yet to make a meaningful interaction, but is constantly hitting her one-liners, much like the newly departed Jasper. All of her lines were GREAT this chapter, but my fav was "Who wrote that for you." Honestly I wish she and Rhonda would interact more!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I'm just going to briefly go over the challenge, because I really need to pee and sitting here typing is starting to hurt! But I have nothing to complain about for the challenge I think the "splitting" it up bits that you do really works for you, I loved the humour that was used during it. If anything I think I would like the roller derby to be slightly rewritten? I was kind of confused as to what happened there? But I'm also not the best reader today!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">OMG I ALMOST FORGOT my fav scene this chapter, which also made me ball! THE KALINO AND FRANN scene omg she was so sad and I could not take it! It felt so believable, with the eggs and everything but it was just SO upsetting, omg. It was nuice to see Fran coming around towards the end of the chapter though.... I think that's something you might want to look at though, a number of your story-arcs tend to be 1-2 chapters long? Maybe try to extend them when and where possible? I mean, I don't know what you have planned but it would have been nice to see Fran being sad a little longer, or Aiden still at odds with his friends for a chapter more!

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I'll leave you with this, proving why Jenny > Toby "You shouldn't have sucked so much."

<p style="font-weight:normal;">ZAC :') I've missed your comments! Sorry I was early :p I'm glad your catching up though! (And I love that you left me a comment as I was reading Frozen and making a comment, we're so in twin synch).

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I knew you would be so saddened by Jasper's departure :'( It breaks my heart but it is what is. I know what Jasper would've said, but I think I'll leave best as a mystery ;3 While Jasper is definitely not going to be returning (at least this season) this may not be the last we've heard of him... He was a favorite to write for and I'm sad to see him go. And glad Lita ws liked, if only because she's been kind of a large character so its nice to know she's not totally hated (but I don't want to influence character opinions).

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I can't lie; this mini arc idea all started out thanks to your suggestions and comments. I hadn't planned on it but its definitely going to be shaping up the plot in the future! I do think I failed a little bit with Jenny's tantrum; she only cares that Hayden got hurt because she favors Hayden due to their interactions in the first challenge. That was suppose to be made more prominent but that scene was cut for time. It will be a bigger focus in the future though. Still, I love Jenny's dynamics and I thank you for this plot idea <3

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I was really excited for you to see this chapter because it focused on the twins! I'm sorry I broke your heart :p Yay loving the volleyball scene <3 I tried with it. And so Easton is back to evil xD I hope it was clear, but the television was suppose to be an edit of what he said early...but made to sound like he still didn't love him. Maybe that doesn't make it better but...

<p style="font-weight:normal;">xDDD I love your Pascal rant (and I forgot Pascal quoted Team Rocket). Ooh...poor Ness....

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Love triangle :3 What Love Triangle? I don't see a triangle. Not even lines have formed ;p Okay there might be a triangle of sorts in one of the already posted chapters...but not what you think. I do love your intense shipping of things though xD I can't really add anymore than read ahead ;)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">AND EEEEEEEE! I'm so glad you liked the party scene and the part with the friends <3 To be honest I thought it was really rough and worked on it a lot. So I'm SOOOOOOOOOO glad that it worked out and you loved it! And glad to hear Seraphina is growing on you. I feel one of the things canon lacked was positive and strong female friendships, something lacking a lot of shows in general, so I wanted those. More development on that next chapter...

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I think you do bring up a good point in that Aiden's hate was done with quickly, and was originally going to be longer. Truth is it was partially influenced by your immediate hate xD I'm not blaming you, that was my fault, but it realized it'd be hard for the character to have funny lines or be enjoyable until he aplogized. I also didn't want my story to be so political and more character/relationship/story driven then about tackling issues. And it also just felt like Melissa and Hayden are the forgiving types. I'm really glad you liked the scenes though <3 The issue won't be completely dropped in the future though...

<p style="font-weight:normal;">xD Vance and Hayden were very fun to write for (and yay creating more ships!). That's a really sweet plotline you thought of (which I might steal for future use...)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">That's an interesting prediction about Zipporah; I'll say that her story and role has a purpose. I did really enjoy writing for her this chapter <3 (though I do every chapter :]) and that's one of my favorite lines.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I didn't realize how much I split into bits until you mentioned but I do that a lot xD I think its just how I organize myself and my story. And I'm glad it made you laugh! The roller derby was confusing, so it may need some editing. I think partially since it was the last challenge (and featured a lot of already focused on characters) I breezed through and used it mostly for jokes.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">And wow I kind of forgot the Kalino and Frannie scene this chapter xD It made you bawl? Yay <3 I mean sorry to make you cry but glad it affected you that much! Honestly, I didn't want Frannie to be so obsessed with Diamonique and her departure so it felt like she revolved around one character. But I think your right that I'm going pretty quickly. This isn't the last mention of Diamonique however...

<p style="font-weight:normal;">And xD I actually think Jenny is my favorite host (but no one likes that bitch Rhonda so its not hard :p). She's just so childish and fun to write for.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Thank you again for the comments Zac <3 I'm super interested to see how your rankings change this time and your thoughts on future chapters. Thank you for leaving this comment and trying to catch up!  What could possibly go wrong?  06:55, April 2, 2016 (UTC)

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<p style="font-weight:normal;">

Bruno's Corner
(Chapter 1) - Loved it! It was a great intro chapter. The cast was introduced so well, they all shined in their own way and were very distinguishable. There was also great interactions, and hilarious scenes. All the Vance's horse scenes made me laugh a lot. So did Joaquin Jackson  James Jasper's intro. And Tessa, I thought she was nice at first, but she's such a bi*ch... I think she's gonna create some drama. I liked Seraphina putting her in her place. <3 Speaking of Seraphina, I like that her being a psychic isn't all about her, she actually has a personality. And I love Cynthia! Boo at Ignacio not being shirtless- wait, who said that? *whispers innocently* But yeah, I like how you did something different from the typical male model character. I ADORE MELISSA SHE'S SO ADORBS AND OTTPPP AND SWEET I WANT TO HUG HER. <3333333 I'm curious to see how Easton/Weston will do, I usually enjoy family dynamics. And Diamonique, she better go far, she's really funny. Loved Griswold too, he was so fun and nice. <3

(Chapter 2) - And another great chapter, with more great interactions. I love Melissa and Cynthia, I'm really hoping they build a friendship out of that... or maybe Cynthia will just murder Melissa and leave the game and never be seen again... but let's hope for the better. <3 Diamonique/Frannie's fight over Ignacio was pretty funny, and I liked how they bonded later on, I expect great stuff from them. Tessa is already causing drama, her conflicts with Lita and Seraphina is interesting, but I LOVE the friendship of Lita/Seraphina/Ness. <3 I laughed at the Pentagram hotel, and then Zipporah loving it. <3 I hope we get to see more of her and the hotel. lol Aw, I'm curious to see what's ahead for Weston/Easton. Pascal being a strategist... I laughed when none of his allies ended up on his team. I'm also curious if Lita and Ignacio will go somewhere, I saw the possible connection in chapter 1 (Mr and Ms Fanservice), and I think they have potential to good interactions. I laughed at Ness/Bethany at the challenge. And speaking of the challenge, all those obstacles were hilarious. WOAH, wait up, will Seraphina... dang I have to read chapter 3... good thing it's already been posted. :)

(Chapter 3) - Aw, Seraphina slayed that challenge. I'm happy. I laughed at Dominique thinking it was a trick of treat challenge. And I loved how she actually won it (and she's actually- a GENIUS? <3). I adored Ness this chapter (not that I didn't in the other chapters), her repeatedly failing at the challenge was hilarious, and then her confessional about her luck changing was pretty nice. I hope it eventually happens (or not, because her misfortunes are hilarious). And Cynthia was AMAZING, she (literally) KILLED that challenge. That's animal cruelty though, poor snake. And- she can SPEAK? I also enjoyed Ignacio in that scene. Zipporah's poster. <3 Loved the maze challenge, Hayden and Jenny/Riley and Toby's interactions were hilarious. Also loved the cage fight scene. DRAG HIM LITA! Btw, is Vance really a cowboy? ;\ Dang, Melissa losing. </3 (Yay for Javier Jasper actually succeeding tho. :P Anyway, I loved this challenge as a whole tbh. <3 Wow, that's a twist. I love Diamonique/Frannie's friendship. It's not something I'd expect, but it works well I think. CYNTHIA SPEAKS AGAIN, and helps Melissa. <3 Wow, a hidden immunity flash driver? :O Kalino has a lot of power now. Aw, I felt bad for Bethany, didn't care that much for her, but I felt bad. Can't wait for more! :D The sky's a little bit gray   but in a beautiful way,   and you're not too far away.  04:01, November 9, 2015 (UTC)


 * (I hope you don't mind but I made you a corner to difference you and Zac's comments) Eeee! I'm so super excited to see this comment! And super happy to see you liked it! Thanks Bruno!


 * (1) So glad the cast felt well introduced to you! Vance's horse scenes is one of my favorite own jokes ever. And I love/find it so funny Jasper is very loved and popular. Tessa will certainly cause...some drama. I'm glad you liked Seraphina, I felt she'd be limited if her personality was just 'psychic' and seem to similar to Dawn. Cynthia <3


 * And xD I'm super happy to hear Melissa is your fav! She's a darling to write for. Hopefully Ignacio will take off more clothes (by which I mean I'm a pervert so he will ;3). And thanks I wanted to try and twist people's expectations with a lot of the character expectations and stereotypes and Iggy was the biggest example of that. (I feel like Kasey was a twist on the idea too actually). Family dynamics are easy to plan  interesting to write for, so I hope I deliver on the twins. Glad you liked Diamonique and that someone likes Griswold!


 * (2) Cynthia and Melissa <3 Hopefully she won't kill Melissa...or at least save her for last... Tessa is already causing drama but she's also allowing a friendship to form and I'm excited to show everyone what I have planned for them... The Pentagram will play a bigger role in future chapters. Glad you enjoyed Zipporah <3


 * I'm so glad you laughed when Pascal failed to get any of his allies on the team xD That was a joke I was setting up and to me characterizes Pascal :p Iggy and Lita will defintely talk more in chapter 4.


 * (3) Seraphina is somewhat good at talking to people, despite hating them :p Diamonique is a mystery wrapped inside in an engima...though part of her backstory will be talked about next chapter. Ness' failings at the challenge were so much fun to write for, it had some more parts that were sadly cut for time D: And Cynthia slays :p Your right, I didn't even think about that snake. It probably had a wife and kids :'(


 * xD I didn't originally plan to have her speak this soon but I figured why not? And yay, at least Iggy got to show us them abs <3 And hooray for enjoying Jenny and Toby's interactions with Hayden and Riley, I liked writing those :3 Lita just really enjoys beating the crap out of people, I can kind of relate :p And nah Vance isn't :p (his bio elaborates on this a little bit).


 * Glad the challenge was good! Frannie and Diamonique's scene at the end was something I really enjoyed <3 Kalino does have a lot of power but how will he use it... Yeah, Bethany wasn't exactly exciting :p But I'm glad her elimination at least made you sad.


 * Once again thanks for the comment Bruno <3 (and voting in the WGC too!) I'm excited to see your rankings but I do really aprreciate you taking the time to comment! I'm so glad you liked the story and hope you enjoy future chapters <3  What could possibly go wrong?  19:50, November 11, 2015 (UTC)

Winner Guessing Contest
<p style="font-weight:normal;">Leave your signature by the contestant you think will win! You can change as long as your pick has not been eliminated! The winner of this contest will be able to have a character in the second story (on the likely chance there is one) or some other prize of value to be discussed. I won't cross off names yet to avoid spoilers for newcomers...

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Aiden-  Space was here  some time ago   and he wrote stuff.  04:25, April 1, 2016 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Bethany-

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Cynthia-

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Diamonique- <font color="#31A880">The brains needed a body.  We found our zombies, now we're in. 04:59, November 1, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Easton-

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Frannie-

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Griswold- <font color="#69F"> Oh  , we don't own our <font color="#96C">  Heavens   now, we <font color="#000">only own our   Hell  ...   19:07, October 25, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Hayden-

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Ignacio-

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Jasper- <font color="#4DB3B3">I can <font color="#3D4C53">see our <font color="#F2C249">stars. ☆  14:04, December 16, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Kalino- Apparently we can change, so I'm going to change to the deity known as Kalino <font color="00008B">And we will never be alone again,  <font color="#DAA520">'cause it doesn't happen every day...  03:10, December 1, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Lita-

Trixielulamoon323 (talk) 18:16, March 30, 2016 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Melissa- She's an ANGEL and should win. The sky's a little bit gray   but in a beautiful way,   and you're not too far away.  04:20, November 9, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Ness-

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Pascal-

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Seraphina-  CK  Hrey! ^_^02:07, November 2, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Tessa-

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Vance-

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Weston -      Z a c  A tt a c k      Rawr 23:52, October 24, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Xidorn-  Manatee12 <font color="Black"> "A man destined to hang can never drown. A man destined to drown can never burn. A man destined to fry can never ever ever die in any other way but frying." 21:01, October 25, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Zipporah-

Final 3 Guessing Contest
<p style="font-weight:normal;">Warning: There be spoilers here. <p style="font-weight:normal;">List the three contestants you think will make the Final 3! You may change your guess as often as you want as long as someone hasn't guessed the same combo. Winner will be able to select a contestant for an All-Stars story or some other prize of value to be discussed.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Weston, Vance, Melissa     Z a c  A tt a c k      Rawr 21:41, October 25, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;font-size:14px;line-height:22px;"> Zipporah, Easton, Kalino Trixielulamay323 (talk) 04:10, December 1, 2015 (UTC)

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Lita, Aiden, Kalino Trixielulamay323 (talk) 04:10, December 1, 2015 (UTC)