Total Drama Kingdom

is the first in a new Total Drama series. It is medieval-themed, and the losers must walk the Road of Shame onto the Chariot of Losers. The teams are the Killer Knights and the Crazy Kings.

Characters

 * Marshall
 * Kelly
 * Ella
 * Terrence
 * Ruby
 * Ed
 * Kenny
 * Jessie

Episode 1: The Sword Is Never In The Stone
Chris walked up to the Road of Shame. "Welcome to Total Drama Kingdom!" he announced. "We're going to meet our eight competitors! First up is...Ed!" "Yo, Chris! Saw you on the commercial!  You were all, 'Join TDK!'" Ed said. "Yes. Yes I was.  Now, meet our second competitor...Kelly!" "Heeey!" Kelly greeted. "Hey Kelly." Chris responded. "I'm SO psyched! This is gonna ROCK!" "Yeah...just don't sing when it's the challenge, 'kay? Anyway, it's Marshall!  Wait...where's Marshall?" A shout came from behind Chris. "HEEEEEY CHRIIIIIIIIIS! IIIIIT'S MEEEEEEE, MAAARSHAALLLLL!" Marshall was parachuting. "Hey, Marshall. Now, our next contestant: Meet Terrence!" "Hey. I just found out this cheat code in a game-" "Yeah, whatever.  After Terrence comes Ella!" "Oh, she's so pretty!" Kelly commented. "WHO IS? NOT ME!" Ella yelled. "Um...um...that girl, who's coming!" Kelly said. "Which brings us to Jessie!" Chris announced. "Huh, huh, huh, huh, huh! Running here was great exercise." Jessie was fat, yet she had just run several miles. "Good...to know...anyway, next up, we have Ruby!" "Hey! Do you like my clothes?" Ruby asked. "They have a lot of...um...flair?" Marshall answered. "They do? Oh yeah, they do!" Ruby kissed Marshall, who fainted after the kiss. "Oooh...anyway, finally, welcome Kenny!" "Ohhh..." Ella said. "He's so dreamy..." Kelly added. "I get that a lot." Chris said. "Not you, you jerk. They mean me!" Kenny corrected.

"Okay, if I call your name, you're on the Killer Knights." Chris said. "Marshall. Jessie.  Ruby.  Kenny.  If I call your name now, you're on the Crazy Kings.  Kelly, Ed, Terrence, Ella." "But...I'm a girl! I don't want to be a KING!" Kelly revolted. "Um...I can't fix that. Anyway, go to the Castle Gardens and put your bags by the door.  Then follow the signs to the meadow.  But it's a race.  Try to make your team the first to the meadow.  And NO PARTNERSHIPS." "What? NO!" Marshall yelled. "Chill out..I know we'll win." Ruby said. "I guess." Marshall sighed. "Ready...set...GO!" Chris counted down and the race began.

"So...the Killer Knights made it. And here comes...Ella." "Don't worry,, I think Ed's coming." Ella assured. Just then, Ed emerged. "I saw Kelly tending to a wound...oh, here she comes." Ed told Chris. "Guys, I'm here! Owwww, this scrape hurts!" Kelly complained. "Did we win?" "No. And do I care about your scrape?  No.  Now where's Terrence?!" Chris asked. "I'm sure he just stopped to play a video game. That means we win!" Ruby was excited. "Not exactly..." Chris corrected.

"The second part of this challenge! You will select two teammates to claim MACES!" Chris announced. "But...why?" Jessie asked. "To find the SWORD IN THE STONE...Excalidrama!" Chris responded. "Isn't it Excalibur?" Ruby asked. "No. Not in this case, at least!  One of these six stones holds the "sword" Excalidrama.  Your job is to send two teammates to guess the correct rock, then drop a mace on it." Suddenly Terrence caught up with the group. "Did we win? DID WE WIN?!" Terrence demanded. "NO!" the Crazy Kings shouted. "You know, Terrence could make up for his mistake." Jessie queried. "It's a thought." Ella said. "But I'll still pound him!" "Th-then it's settled! Ella and Terrence, go out there!" Ed commanded.

"How're the Knight's working out?" Chris walked over the the group of four. "We've selected Ruby and Jessie." Kenny confirmed. "Got it. Alright, begin smashing!  ...Jessie and Ruby have taken incorrect guesses...and so has Ella.  Surprisingly, Terrence has tied the challenge!" "All right! Good job Terrence!" Kelly screamed. "But!" "There's a but? Don't tell me that!" Kelly said, worryingly. "Yeah, there is. It's a tie.  So, now that there are 2 more rocks, you have to carry them back in a race to the Gardens." Chris confirmed.

"The Kings have reached the Halfway mark! The Knights are catching up!" Chris said from the megaphone. "I have an idea!" Ruby exclaimed. "What is that idea?" Marshall asked. "We've gotta put ALL of our strength into this...Kenny. Let go and run!  Distract those Crazy Kings with your hotness!" "Cool." Kenny said. And with that, the Crazy Kings were practically paralyzed for the rest of the race, which meant the Killer Knights won by a landslide. "The Killer Knights WIN!" Chris "Now, everyone head to the courtroom of the castle to see who will board the Chariot of Losers!"

"It's time to cast your votes," Chris explained. "When I call your name, come up and receive the password for your computer button. This code will change every day.  Click on your computer button, enter the code, and click on who you wanna vote for.  This will count as half of a vote.  This is what the Knights will do.  The Kings will find Voting devices under their seats.  Press the button next to who you want voted off.  This will count as a full vote."

"Knights, you may leave. Unless, of course, you want to see someone ride the chariot!  Just kidding, leave NOW.  Kings; when I call your name, come up and get your Sword-and-Shield button to put on your shirt or something.  Ed.  Ella."

DRAMATIC PAUSE WITH DRAMATIC MUSIC

"…………………Kelly. Terrence, time to leave on the Chariot of Shame, bro.  See ya."

Episode 2: The Ride To Drama Town
Chris sat in the judges' seat in the courtroom. "Last time on Total Drama Kingdom, our contestants arrived and raced to the Castle Meadow in part one of the challenge. The Crazy Kings lost the race, and Terrence was so late, the next part of the challenge had started when he arrived.  Heh, heh.  But he made up for his tardiness when he won part two for the Kings.  Then the two teams carried boulders back to the Castle Gardens, where Kenny distracted the Kings with his hotness.  The Killer Knights won the challenge, and despite his win, Terrence boarded the Chariot of Losers." Chris got up and started walking. "See who leaves tonight on Total Drama Kingdom."

Kelly is in the shower, crying. "I MISS TERRENCE! WHY?! WHY!?  WHHYYYYYYY?!" Kelly cried. Ella was outside of the shower, waiting for Kelly to get out, along with Jessie and Ruby. "Um, we're WAITING." Ruby remarked. "YEAH! GET OUT, STICKLER!  SUCK IT UP!" Ella screamed. Suddenly, the water stopped running, and Chris walked up to the girls, and threw a towel into the shower. "Good morning, girls!" Chris said. The boys followed behind. "I'm not done with my shower! UGH!" Kelly grunted. "That's why I threw a towel in there...anyway, time's-a-wasting! Come to the Royal Stable in six!" Chris told them, and walked away. "So...babe...how you been?" Marshall walked over to Ruby. "Fine, just fine." Ruby suddenly grabbed Marshall and whispered, "We're not an item yet. I've got a plan to get us to the next round.  And I mean the entire team.  But don't worry.  If we lose, I have a plan.  Okay, turquoise?" "What's turquoise supposed to-oh, my shirt."

"Welcome to day two in the kingdom." Chris announced. "Today, we're going out of the kingdom and to a little...er...set called Drama Town." "Everything's DRAMA to you, isn't it?" Ruby retaliated. "Shush!" Chris said. "Anyway, you'll ride your horses to drama town to claim the arena. Once in the arena, you'll pick one team member to joust." "Can we leave people out? Because Jessie's gonna crush the horse." Marshall asked. "No." Chris responded. "Don't comment on my weight! I'll just get on a fat horse!" Jessie retorted.

"And they're off!" Chris announced. "Marshall is in the lead, with Ruby and Ella right behind!" "That's right! Winner coming through!" Marshall exclaimed. All of a sudden Ruby rode up, jumped off of her horse and onto Marshall's, and they kissed. Then Marshall's horse fell down, and Ella won the race and claimed the arena.

Once everyone was there, Chris explained the rules. "Since Ella made it to Drama Town first, she gets to pick the member from the Killer Knights who competes!" Chris explained. "What? That is unacceptable!" Kenny yelled. "Well, too bad, hottie!" Ella taunted. "Wanna bring it, pretty?" Kenny retaliated. "Oh, THAT'S IT YOU-" Ella was cut off by Chris. "Settle down...anyway, Crazy Kings, time to pick!" The Crazy Kings chose Kelly, while Ella chose Ruby. "A battle of the girls...nice!" Chris commented. "But...I stink on horses!" Ruby screamed. "Well, that's how you can settle things with your teammates." Kenny stated. "Okay...for Kenny!" Ruby smiled and pumped her arm in the air. "Ahem." Marshall cleared his throat. "Oh, yeah, for you too, Marshall!" Then she blew a kiss and Ruby rode into battle with Kelly. "I saw Ruby. She sucks on horses." Ella whispered to Ed. "Yeah. She's no match.  Blondes are obviously superior." Ed whispered back. "That's saying something, Ed. I thought that you'd say that, take off a wig and be a natural blonde but no!  You're a cool guy." Ella kissed Ed on the cheek and walked away. "And the tamer tames the beast! Yes!" Ed said to himself.

"Looks like Ruby is LOSING it!" Chris laughed. "But Kelly's not to stable either...oh, what's this? They both fell off of their horses at the same time!" Kelly got up. "But...who won?" she said. "Yeah, Chris, who won?" Ruby asked, anxiously. "Er...I guess since Ella got to Drama Town first, we can consider the Killer Knights the losers."

Chris sat in the judge's seat while the contestants voted. "The votes have been cast...Crazy Kings, you may leave to go to the dorms." Chris said. "And the armor buttons, the safety emblems, the chances at winning, go to: Kenny." Ruby had a smile on her face, while Jessie had a blank expression. Marshall looked a bit worried. "Oooooh." Kenny. "Marshall." Chris declared. Ruby looked at Jessie and raised her eyebrows, and snickered. Jessie gasped. "The final armor button goes to Ruby. Jessie, it's time." "Wait, but I didn't do anything wrong though!" Jessie exclaimed. "Yeah, man, I swear Ruby was voted off!" Kenny stated. "I voted for Ruby!" Jessie exclaimed. "And I voted for Ruby, because she ruined my winning chances in the race!" Marshall admitted. "Lies...lies...LIES!" Jessie whispered as she boarded the Chariot of Losers.

Ruby walked in front of the camera after everyone left. "Heh, heh...all I needed was to bribe Chris with a lot of money to raise the drama and eliminate Jessie, not me. And it worked, with the excuse that it would 'raise ratings' and a bunch of other useless stuff that I don't care about." She then turned off the camera.

Episode 3: Talent Wars
Chris was in between the two dorms. "The stable presented the first stage for yesterday's challenge when the two teams rode on their trusty steeds into town. Marshall was about to make it first when Ruby jumped on his horse, made out with him, and then Marshall's horse was crushed causing Ella to get to Drama Town first.  Then, Ruby and Kelly competed in the arena, which resulted in a tie.  Since Ella made it to Drama Town first, the Killer Knights were sent to the courtroom, where Jessie was supposed to be safe.  Heh, heh...I was bribed by Ruby to add drama and eliminate Jessie.  Just for that, we changed the challenge to give her a heck of a time!  Find out who is eliminated in the most emotional court voting yet on Total Drama Kingdom!"

"Ruby, something's strange about you today..." Marshall remarked. "Oh, please. Thanks for lying to keep me in, though!" Ruby kissed Marshall. "But, I didn't-" Marshall was cut off by Chris. "GOOD MORNING CONTESTANTS!!" Chris yelled from the megaphone. "Please report to the castle stage in 7!" "Well, you heard him..." Kelly sighed. "I swear, if I could, I'd pound him." Ella added.

Chris was on the stage. "Anger...I like it! Today's challenge will be a mixture of sword fighting, commanding, and talents!"

The six remaining contestants walked up to the stage. "Welcome to day three," Chris greeted. "Today, I'm putting you in two pairs...one from the Knights, one from the Kings. The King in the pair chooses the opponent to face their Knights...two Knights fighting to impress the ruler...me!" "Jerk..." Ed muttered. "Anyway, the winning pair will go head-to-head in a talent contest of the ages!" "So...we sword fight our teammates then compete against a king in a talent contest?" Ruby asked. "Corrrrectamundo!" Chris said. "Now, here are the pairs: Kelly and Kenny-" Chris was cut off. "EEEEEEEE!" Kelly screeched. "-Ella and Marshall, and last but possibly least, Ed and Ruby. Alright, it's time to choose the competitor for the arena!"

"The first match: Ruby VS Kenny!" Chris announced. Kenny threw his javelin, then Ruby charged at Kenny and yelled, "FOR MARSHALLLLLLLL!" Kenny fell off of his horse. "All right, Kelly and Kenny are eliminated from the challenge, so by default, Ruby VS Marshall!" Chris declared. "What? NOT fair!" Ruby yelled. "Heheh, sorry, flair girl!" Chris taunted. "Let the match begin!" Marshall flinched, then charged Ruby. Ruby purposely screamed and fake cried, causing Marshall to feel her pain and suffering. "I...I drop...I drop out!" Marshall declared his forfeit. "Well...then...Ruby and Ed, practice your talents!"

"Why did you do that for me?" Ruby asked Marshall when she saw him. "Because...I...I love-" Marshall was cut off when he was kissed by Ruby. "S-So, what's your talent going to be?" Marshall asked. "I'm writing a short story about a young couple in Great Britain in medieval times." Ruby said. "Oh. Well, good luck with that, Ruby."

Chris walked to the microphone. "TTTTTIIIIMMMEEEEESSSSS up!" He yelled. "Come to the stage now!"

"Okay...I got this..." Ruby said, worryingly. "Don't worry, you'll do great!" Marshall encouraged. Ruby walked up to the stage and read her story.

"Harvey and Leaf were a wonderful couple...until they were pitted against each other in a match. They were walking, hand in hand, when Harvey was blamed for a crime that he didn't do.  Leaf was shocked.  She objected as many times as she could, but nothing worked.  Finally, the judge gave in when she proposed to duel him in a fight.  If she won, he was free.  There was no forfeiting, and Harvey had to try his best of he was disqualified.  Harvey tried to object, but it was no use.  In the battle, both of the lovebirds were hurt severely.  So severely, in fact, that after Leaf won, Harvey died from the injury.  Leaf's wounds were just as severe, but the was rushed to a hospital in time.  When she exited, she was arrested for supposedly killing Harvey.  Although his death was her fault, she tried to object.  It was no use.  While in prison, Leaf realized that if she wasn't so attached to him, she would not be in prison, and Harvey would not be dead. This thought eventually grew into a hatred for Harvey."

Everyone was asleep by the time she finished. They woke up when Chris yelled, "NEXT!" into the mic. Ed's talent was playing multiple sports at the same time, and scoring 4 goals in each of them. Everyone clapped, and the Kings were the winners. "The Crazy Kings win it!" Chris declared. The Kings cheered so loudly, Ruby had to put in earplugs. Kenny was giving Ruby a stern look, and whispered, "You're...going... down... "

"I'll tally the votes!" Chris said in a singsong voice. "And the armor buttons go to: Kenny..." Ruby and Marshall started making out. Marshall whispered, "I love you Ruby..." Ruby whispered, "I love you too..." back. "The final armor button goes to.......

DRAMATIC PAUSE

"...Rub-Marshall. Marshall.  Come get your button." Chris commanded. They were still making out, and they went on the Chariot of Losers together. Five minutes later, the Chariot returned with a sobbing Marshall, who sobbed in the courtroom all night until an intern released sleeping gas.

"At least the contestants got three and a half ours of sleep," Chris announced at dawn. "I have earplugs...and a suite, yep; I rock."

Theme Song
(To the tune of "I Wanna Be Famous")

Dear Mom and Dad, I don't know why (Ruby is writing a letter)

My happiness is so dry (Terrence thumps Ruby and shows her a video game, Ruby kicks Terrence)

But this kingdom is alright to me (Terrence climbs out through the window into a garden where Ella is lifting weights)

And I think I know my destiny (Jessie is jogging on a trail bordering a lake next to the garden)

I'm gonna be king (Marshall is surfing in a lake)

I wanna live royal life (Marshall trips Jessie)

But this place brings me strife (Jessie pushes Marshall into the lake)

I have to prove that I'm the best (Kelly comes up from underwater, scares Marshall, laughs, and gets out of the lake)

This castle's no jest (Jessie looks at Kelly awkwardly, then Ed runs to Jessie)

I'm gonna be king (Kenny is between Jessie and Ed, and they stare at him in awe)

Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na (All characters run towards the castle)

I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be King (Chris stops them at the door)

I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be King (Jessie kicks Chris and everyone enters the castle, Chris runs after them)

(Everyone is in the courtroom whistling the tune, then the logo for Total Drama Kingdom appears)