Total Drama 101



Total Drama 101 is a school-themed fanfiction, created by Bbhinton15.

Overview
20 teenagers have signed up (voluntarily or not) to compete in a competition entitled Total Drama 101. Total Drama 101 puts a reality-check spin on the animated, simplicity of the hit series, Total Drama. The 20 contestants signed up for this competition will be governed by their host, Chris McLean. Chris will divide the 20 teens into two teams, where they will participate in school subject-themed vigorous challenges. Each challenge will be held in a classroom of the school (the main setting of Total Drama 101). At the end of each challenge, one team will be victorious and the other team will have to remove one of their own team members from the competition by voting on who should be eliminated. This session of voting will take place in the Detention Hall classroom, and will be called the Detention Hall Ceremony. Chris will administer Golden A+'s, a parody of the Total Drama Action Gilded Chris Awards, to determine who will be eliminated from the competition and who won't be. The contestant who does not receive a Golden A+ will be forced to walk down the Walk of Shame and leave the school. This same process continues throughout the entire season, with many surprises along the way, until one contestant is left. The last, remaining contestant will win the entire competition and receive the $1,000,000 cash prize.

Staff
Chris McLean - Total Drama 101 Host

Chef Hatchet - Total Drama 101 Cook, Co-Host, and Assistant

Interns - Total Drama 101 Challenge and Scenery Assistants

Contestants
Alyssa: (The Lax) - Alyssa is usually one to be known as a calm, laid-back, and collected individual, but it's best not to try her. She's a predominant nice person back at home, but can get mean every so often. She loves animals, and joined Total Drama 101 in hopes to win the money to open up an animal shelter.

Ariel: (The Nice Guy) - Ariel is a happy, nice, and sweet individual. Honestly, he'd like everyone to be his friend. He compliments everyone on their excellence, lets everyone use his possessions, and, in general, is just a kind-hearted friend. He joined Total Drama 101 to show others that nice people deserve to win something just by being sweet.

Brandon: (The Know-It-All) - Brandon is seen as a "nerd" back home. He doesn't get out of the house much, has no social life, has an IQ of about 280, and likes schoolwork. He's very nice, but is an easy target to pick on emotionally. Brandon joined Total Drama 101 in order to prove that brains beat brawn in most competitions.

Carter: (The Stuck-Up Richie) - Carter is a very stuck-up, wimpy individual, who usually doesn't think before he speaks, and has no respect for anyone other than rich people. Carter joined Total Drama 101 to show everyone that the rich can do anything and to even become richer.

Chuck: (The Cool One) - Chuck is that type of guy you always see leaning on a wall with one foot on the ground and one behind him on the wall, the "cool-cat". He comes from a regular family, but doesn't seem to care much for them. He joined Total Drama 101 due to a dare and not having anything else to do.

Dedrek: (The Foreign Exchanged) - Dedrek, hailing from France, has just become a citizen in the United States. Anxious to learn about American ways, he joined Total Drama 101 so he could learn to speak better English and befriend some people.

Gretel: (The Failure at Life) - Gretel has struggled all her life. Not with money, or education, but other aspects of life. She is incredibly awkward, and has offended many countries, causing international incidents. She has never had a boyfriend, and has almost no friends. She didn't knowingly join Total Drama 101. Her parents were having company over and needed to get rid of her as soon as possible, so they reluctantly signed her up.

Jeff: (The Laid-Back Comic) - Jeff is usually the life of the party wherever he goes. Jeff is always in the in-crowd among the popular students, but doesn't have this turn him into a snob. Jeff is so beloved amoung his peers that he managed to win his school election for the office of President without even making a speech. Jeff is a very loyal person and would never turn his back on his friends. And while Jeff usually tries to avoid conflict, he would fight if he had to. Jeff decided to join Total Drama 101 as a way to get easy money and because he had nothing else to do.

Johnathan: (The Helpful Individual) - Johnathan is a very kind friend, only because he was never among spoiled, vague, or mean people when growing up. His talent, of course, is helping people. Johnathan seems to be nothing but a human angel. He comes from a normal family, having one of each intermediate member in his family (Mother, Father, Brother, and Sister). He joined Total Drama 101 so that he can make even more friends, and show the world that you can go far in a competition just by having a great attitude.

Katherine: (The Happy-Go-Lucky Chump) - Katherine doesn't believe in rules unless necessary, which is hardly ever. She loves to party, and usually returns home a few minutes before she has to get ready for school. Her motto is, "Let loose with no excuse." She joined Total Drama 101 to party with different people, and possibly win the money to throw the biggest bash ever.

Lilie: (The Friendly-"A" Type) - Lilie, coming from a house of sucessful businesspeople, strives for only the best. She is very friendly and hard to make angry, but when she is angry, it's very ugly. Also, If someone tops her, she tends to spend a lot of time trying to beat them, even if it means not sleeping or eating. She joined Total Drama 101 for getting the money to invent new protien shakes.

Liz: (The Sporty Girl) - All her life, Liz always had gotten good grades, never got in trouble at school, or even life, and wasn't really all that popular, until she got caught up in all these extra curricular activities. After she started playing sports, such as tennis and softball, she was among the popular. She still had a nice heart and soul within, but started getting more evil by the day. Liz joined Total Drama 101 for her interest in education, love for sports, and to show the world what a powerful female could do.

Nalyd: (The Mysterious Mastermind) - Nalyd's a guy who's calm, cool, and collected. He doesn't get angry easily, and tends to be untrustworthy. The biggest problem in his life is his lack of skills when it comes to girls and relationships. However, there's more to Nalyd than one knows. He joined Total Drama 101 to get the money and "the girl".

Ryan: (The King of Mean) - Ryan's secret fear of being uncool turned him into an unkind manipulator who's always got his eyes set on winning. He joined Total Drama 101 so he can use the money to buy a luxurious mansion and get away from his family, who he greatly dislikes.

Samantha: (The Crazy Psycho) - Samantha's a bit of an odd one. She likes to converse with imaginary friends, speak in third person, and laugh maniacally. Although she's easy to get along with, she's also a bit of a weirdo at times, and can freak others out. She joined Total Drama 101 solely on the reason that she wants to use the money she wins to build a real house out of carrots.

Stefani: (The Underdog) - Stefani has more personality swings than bones in her body. She tends to drift away from people and wander around on her own, observing the world. Stefani has a boyfriend at home named Jordan. She "told" him and our producers that she joined Total Drama 101 in order to afford her own apartment to live with him.

Tammi: (The Bossy Cheerleader) - Tammi's life is very busy. She is currently the head of her school's cheerleading squad, school president, head of the yearbook committee, and captain of her high school's gymnastic team. Aspiring to become a model, Tammi joined Total Drama 101 for the money, not to befriend people, or "dirtbags", as she puts it.

Terry: (The Nervous Flirt) - Terry is nothing but a walking pile of nervousness. He even wet his pants one day when a girl said "hello" to him. With all these qualities, the one thing he wants people to understand is that he is a nice, kind-hearted guy. Terry joined Total Drama 101 to become more confident.

Webby: (The Goofball) - Webby is a friendly person, but to some, he is a goofball. He is always the class clown and his teachers have suspended him several times for goofing off. He likes really weird things, including how snakes eat mice, but the reason why he joined Total Drama 101 is to improve and learn more goofy jokes, as well as having fun!

Zach: (The Random Jock) - Zach, filled with random information, is usually ignored. He says or does the most random things and spazzes out when no one listens to him. He is kind and helpful and tends to be gulliible. It's best NOT to get on his bad side. He joined Total Drama 101 in order to get money for college and help his family out.

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Teams

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Theme Song
(Camera pops out of a basketball in the gymnasium, then out of a book in the random classroom, then out of a desk [which has a raccoon in it, it escapes]; a stopwatch comes into view with someone holding it, as someone stops it from spinning)

Dear Mom & Dad, I'm doing fine. (Overview of Gilded Glory; camera instantly rushes inside, pan through the hallways, Chris jumps out of the way, papers fly everywhere)

You guys are on my mind! (Webby is in the cafeteria, dancing on a table, like an idiot, in front of Alyssa and Stefani, who shrug their shoulders)

You asked me what I wanted to be. (Brandon gives a speech to Chris in the History classroom; Chris gives it a thumbs down, pushes a button, and Brandon falls through a drop zone)

Now, I think the answer's plain to see. (Liz is doing a push-up a second in the girls' locker room and Gretel, doing a push up, and giving out on the first one)

I wanna be famous! (Terry is seen looking at the girls through a hole in the wall, but gets caught and slapped by Samantha, behind him, who tries to run away, but runs into a wall)

I wanna live close to the sun. (Outside, Nalyd and Ryan are in a slap fight)

So, pack your bags, 'cuz I already won. (Ariel runs inside the school with the camera, to try getting onscreen, but trips; Johnathan goes over and helps him up; Ariel smiles)

Everything to prove, nothing in my way, I'll get there one day. (Rush back inside, papers fly everywhere again; in the Sex Ed room, Carter, Chuck, and Dedrek are tied to a seat, and Chef walks in front of the screen and shows a video called "The Miracle of Life")

'Cuz I wanna be famous! (In the Home Economics Room, Lilie is seen looking in a bubbling pot; it explodes in her face; she looks into the camera, sad)

'''Na, na-na-na-na! Na-na-na-na-na-na! Na-na-na-na-na-na!' (The camera pans into many schools of the room and stops at the Driver's Education room at the last "na", the camera goes in the room)''

I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous! (Zach and Tammi are driving in the Driver's Education class together; they are seen cheering after they get an Golden A+ from Chris for their driving skills)

'''I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous! *whistles*' (Rush to the Detention Hall room; In detention, Jeff and Katherine are seen, almost turning around to meet each others' eyes and each almost smile, but they get stopped by Chris and Chef, who motion them to look straight ahead; the camera zooms out to show everyone in detention with "Total Drama 101" written on the dry-erase board)''

Chapter One: Competition in the Air
The camera fades in to see the closed doors of Gilded Glory High School in Vancouver, Canada. Chris pops up out of nowhere.

"Last season on Total Drama World Tour!", Chris announced. "Those 17 losers battled it out for another million dollars! And, in the end, it was a heroine that win the season."

Chris continued, "Yes, that's right, Courtney was the winner of the third dramatic season! Unfortunately, as soon as we gave her the ONLY check we had left, it... uhh... 'slipped' out of her hands and fell out of our drop zone at the Drop of Shame.

He began to laugh and walked into the school.

"Hey, it wasn't our fault. She, uhh, 'dropped' it," he began to laugh more. "Anyway, we grew tired of those idiots, and got 20 more new idiots to entertain you! In this new season of Total Drama, we will watch these 20 contestants go mad, fighting for that one grand prize, one million dollars! So, sit back, relax, and enjoy this brand new season of... Total... Drama... 1-0-1!"

The Total Drama 101 theme song plays. After it, the camera fades in to Chris, again, standing outside of Gilded Glory High school.

"Okay, so here's the deal." Chris began, "Any minute now, 20 teenagers will be arriving in their own school buses. If my schedule is right, they should be arriving in alphabe--"

Chris stopped. The first school bus arrives at Gilded Glory campus, a normal-looking girl hops out.

"First to arrive? Alyssa." Chris prompted.

"Hi... Chris, isn't it?" Alyssa questioned.

Chris sighed, "Yes, it is. You're supposed to know that! Please go stand over there." Alyssa picks up her bags and goes to wait in front of the school doors. "Wow, it really is a school," Alyssa mumbled as she walked.

The second bus honked it's horn in the distance. It arrived moments later and a teen that seemed to be loaded with innocence docked off the bus with his luggage.

"Ariel, how are ya?!" Chris let out.

Ariel steps out and shouts, "Awesome, man! It's great to be here..... at..... school." Ariel's smile began to fade.

"You're not going to learn anything, dude." Chris replied, which caused Ariel to let out a huge sigh of relief. Ariel walked over to Alyssa and stood to wait.

As the second bus disappeared into the day, a third one came.

"Another bus?" Ariel said from afar. Chris turned to Ariel, not seeing Brandon, the next contestant, get out of his bus, "Yes, Ariel, you all got your own individual buses."

"Hi!!!!" Brandon yelled. Chris jumped about 2 feet and shrieked.

"What's your de--", Chris turned around to see Brandon, a short and nerdy young boy. A record scratch was heard. "Whoa."

"Uhh, what is that witty remark inferred to signify?" Brandon yelped.

Chris eyed Brandon, "I'd love to answer that question, but, sadly, I have no clue what you just said! Now, go join the others over there in front of the school."

Brandon hitched up his pants, grabbed his luggage, and stiffly walked towards the other contestants. "Touchy," he remarked.

"Yeesh, just what we needed. Another nerd to take Harold's spot," Chris exclaimed as the next bus approached.

A very skinny boy wearing the classic sweater-vest and pants advanced out of the bus.

"Carter! How are ya, my brother?" Chris extended his hand to touch Carter's shoulder but Carter quickly stopped him.

"Don't touch me, I'm richer than you'll know," Carter snorted. "Far richer." Carter easily caught on with what he was supposed to do, grabbed his luggage, and joined the others. "You cannot be serious. We're literally staying in a school?" Carter mumbled as he walked towards it.

Chris checked his watch; 4 hours had past since Alyssa, the first contestant, got to Gilded Glory. "Okay, this is taking way too long," he exclaimed. "I want the rest of the rest of those buses here, altogether, now!". Alyssa, Ariel, Brandon, and Carter look around as a cricket begins to chirp. It chirps ongoing for 10 seconds while Chris waits for the contestants. Carter threw a large pebble at the cricket, causing it to get squished.

"Dumb pest," Carter murmured.

"That poor animal," Alyssa said as a small tear formed in her left eye.

Carter turned his head to her, "Really? Are you being serious right now? You're gonna cry over a cricket?"

"Of course not," Alyssa sniffled.

Ariel and Brandon, in between Carter and Alyssa, watched the two go at it for a few more minutes, before all 16 of the rest of the buses came up to Chris's feet.

The rest of the contestants all scamper out of their buses with their own luggage and come together in a small group.

"Okay, let's do this," Chris said as he cleared his throat. "Okay, everyone who just got off the buses," Chris pointed to the four that had already made it. "This is Alyssa... Ariel... Brandon... and Carter." Chris walked over to the group of people that had just came to Gilded Glory.

"Here we go," Chris announced. Chris walks over to a guy, who's sporting shades, a leather jacket, and a red, blue, and green combination outfit.

Chris feels his leather jacket, "Ooh, leather-y." He laughed, "Everyone, this is Chuck! Anything you'd like to say, bro?"

"Whatever," Chuck wittingly replied.

"Okay...." He then went over to a boy sporting French clothes and colors. "This is Dedrek."

"'Allo!" Dedrek squealed. "It is very nice to be doing this... how you say, 'competition'."

Chris got close up to the camera, "If it's not painfully obvious, we got a Frenchy this season. I wonder how that's going to work."

Chris laughed as he went to the next person, who was sneezing uncontrollably for a few seconds.

"Ble-- Bles-- Ble-- Bless-- AUGH!" Chris stuttered, unable to get out a complete 'bless you' due to another sneeze occurring. "Whatever. Guys, this is.... eugh... Gretel."

"Hidey-ho, everyone. It's nice to meet you all, and even you, Chris," Gretel cheerfully said without sneezing.

"Yeah," Chris wipes the saliva Gretel sneezed onto his face. "We've met real good, already." After that, Chris hurried to the next contestant.

Chris walked up a guy, decked in black. "My card says that this is Jeff. Everyone, welcome Jeff!"

"Thanks, man, great to be here at... school... again," Jeff scarcely said.

"You're not going to learn anything that you probably don't already know," Chris informed the group for the second time.

Jeff looked at Chris, then looked at the rest of the contestants, "Hey, dudes!"

They remained silent for 15 seconds. "Awk-ward," Chris frowned, then went to the next contestant.

Chris stopped at a rather tall guy, with a red shirt on, classic blue jeans, and wearing a smile.

"Johnathan! Dude! I heard a lot of good things about you," Chris shouted.

"Heh, yeah, I get that a lot," Johnathan said back. "People say I'm too good-hearted. In fact, they als--"

Chris interrupts him, "Okay, okay, you're cutting into my camera time." Chris motions the cameraman to get an unneeded close up on himself.

Chris walks over to a girl next, dressed in somewhat party-time clothes, who seemed to be impatient, as she was doing mini-bounces from the ground.

"Next up, is Ka--" Katherine literally runs over Chris and runs to meet the other contestants.

"Hi!! I'm Katherine! Call me Katy, and you'll die, kay!?" Katherine implied.

Every contestant's eyes got twice as wider as they once were after hearing this. Katherine walks closer to the rest of the contestants and accidentally bumps into Jeff.

"Oh, excuse me," Jeff pointed out. "Yeah, whatever," Katherine rudely replied without even looking at Jeff. Katherine then takes the time to look at Jeff.

"I apolo--," Jeff tried to say.

"No, no... It, uhh, was my fault," Katherine interrupted.

"Hmm," Chris looked at the two of them.

Chris ran to the next contestant. "Guys, this is Lilie!"

Lilie was decked out in dark blue and black clothes, while on a cellphone during her introduction. Only her parts of the conversation could be heard.

"No... No... Yes... No, mother! I told you I got accepted into Total Drama 101! Yes.... Alright... Sure... No, mom, it's a turtle... No... NO! Well, maybe you'd be better off!" Lilie was saying to her mom.

Chris motioned Lilie to go join everyone else by the door of the school, and she did so.

"Gonna have problems with her," Chris mentioned as he went to the next girl, a tall and fairly strong-looking individual. "This one might come in handy. Everyone, meet Liz!"

Liz literally threw her luggage to the correct position where she was going to stand at in front of the school door.

"Hey, girl, hey! I'm Liz, and I hope this experience is fun," she yelled out.

"Superwoman...," Carter said from afar. "I know right," Ariel joined in.

"Alright," Chris said. "I don't think the next contestant, Nalyd, is here, so let's go--"

Nalyd cleared his throat.

"Who was that?" Chris questioned. Nalyd was behind Chris, and he tapped Chris's shoulder. Chris turned around and shrieked over Nalyd's paleness.

"OH! Oh, my boxers, I mistook you for an angry tree stump," Chris told Nalyd. Nalyd was a "pale-as-a-sheet" boy, with only his gray hoodie able to be seen without squinting.

"... It's Richard Nixon!" a voice from the crowd of people said. "Yeah, I get that a lot," Nalyd sadly said, as he picked his luggage up and went to the door.

"Zat is one very... how you say... white boy," Dedrek announced.

"Sure is," Katherine agreed.

"How do you even spell that?" Carter spoke out.

Chris walked over to Ryan. Ryan had a smug look upon his face.

"Okay, thi--"

"You don't have to introduce this," Ryan assured Chris, pointing to himself. "I'm Ryan, learn the name."

He walked over to the school door and dropped his luggage on Nalyd's right foot.

"Ouch!" Nalyd screamed. "Whatever, you'll live," Ryan sparked.

Nalyd eyed Ryan, as Ryan looked at the next contestant Chris was to introduce.

Chris went over to a hyperactive girl. She was wearing multiple colors, and was breathing rather heavily, waiting to get introduced.

"Welcome, Samantha!" said Chris

Samantha grabbed her luggage, "Hi guys!" She stopped, and looked down to the right of her feet, "No, you don't need an introduction." She ran up to the doors of the school, as everyone stared over what she just did.

"Who was just she talking to?" said Ryan. "I dunno, looks like the dirt," Jeff added.

"Moving right along," Chris said, as he moved right along. He stopped at the next person, Stefani. "Yeesh, and I thought Nalyd was pale. Please meet Stefani!"

Stefani yawned, "Ahhh, whatever." She had only brought one full, store-owned bag and considered it her "luggage", and went to join the rest of the contestants.

Johnathan saw this as an opportunity to make another friend. "Hi! I'm Johnathan," he shouted and put his hand on her shoulder.

"Take it off, before I break it off," Stefani smugly responded. Johnathan immediately removed his hand.

Chris laughed as he went to the next person, "She's going to fit in ever-so-nicely, heh. Next up, is Tammi!"

Tammi put down her luggage and waved at the group, "It's great to be here... not really... but I feel like I'm forced to say that." She began to smile, but the smile went away, as she joined the rest of the group.

"Hey, Tammi! I'm Ariel!" Ariel sounded out. "Yeah, sure," she quickly said.

Ariel turned to Alyssa & Brandon and tried to whisper, "Gosh, she's hot."

"I heard that, you know. And, for the record, I'm beyond 'so-out-of your-league'," she snapped back at him. Tammi walked away from Ariel, but Ariel began to follow her. Tammi stopped in her tracks, hid behind Jeff and Katherine, and waited on Ariel to catch up. He did so, and Tammi put her foot out, causing Ariel to trip and fall.

"Ow. What was that for?" Ariel looked at Jeff.

"Wasn't me, man," Jeff assured him. Ariel began looking for Tammi again and couldn't find her. Unfortunately, for him, Tammi had gone back to her first spot.

"Next is Terry!" Chris beamed, "He looks happy, and if you didn't catch that, it was sarcasm. Terry! Something wrong?"

Terry looked at Chris and said "No" about 15 times.

"So, I'm gonna take that as a 'No'," Chris giggled as Terry went over by Lilie.

"Alright," said Chris, "just so no person would be introduced last, I'll introduce the both of these last two guys at the same time. Here we have Webby, and over there, Zach."

Webby moved on to the rest of the contestants, but Zach stayed where he was. He couldn't feel his legs over the fact that the first person he saw was Alyssa.

Chris snapped his fingers, "Yo, Zachary? You in this or what?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah, right," Zach hurried over and stood next to Alyssa.

"... Hi," he finally said. "Hey, yourself," she said and winked at him, causing him to nearly faint.

"Okay, everyone's here, correct? Good. Now..." Chris opened the doors of Gilded Glory and showed that the school is literally 40 times bigger on the inside than it is on the outside. "You're all here for multiple reasons, but there's also one thing that's probably drawn you here to this competition," Chris leads them to Room 408, the Business classroom.

"It's because of that thing right there," he points to a giant, signed check from Total Drama 101, promising $1,000,000 to someone.

"Anyway, only one will win that giant amount of money. Now, my card here says that all 20 of you remarkably have watched all 3 seasons of Total Drama so far, so, you should know that this game gets ugly at times."

"Too late," Ryan looked at Nalyd, causing everyone to laugh.

Nalyd sighed, "Sweetie, don't talk about yourself like that." Everyone laughed even harder.

"Anyway, the only two things that I need to tell you about, before we get started, are the new confessionals, and the new challenges!" Chris stated.

Chris: This is the new confessional. It's a small bathroom. They are located in each room or building that we may be in when in a challenge. You all know the use of this thing, so get to using it!

Samantha: Omigosh! Omigosh! Omigosh! Omigosh! Omigosh! Omigosh! Omigosh! Omigosh! This place is so cool!

Jeff: Wicked.

Tammi: Augh! We're supposed to trash-talk in this trash?! It's disgusting!

Nalyd: So, I'm here with a lot of losers. Interesting. It'll be just like home.

"Also a new thing, are the challenges! We're going school-themed this season, so every challenge will be based off of school subjects! But, trust me, you'll wish you were learning something instead of participating in these badboys! Challenge 1? GYM! That's right, you'll all be participating in an obstacle course!" A few of the contestants cheered, while some groaned.

Chris takes out a card, "But, before we can get started with that, you guys need to be separated! Heh, if I call your name, please come stand here to my left side: Alyssa, Zach, Ariel, Webby, Brandon, Tammi, Carter, Lilie, Jeff, and.... Katherine! From this moment on, you will be known as the Screaming Pencils!"

"Why are we named after a stupid stick?" Carter asked.

"Because, I wanted you to be. Like it or like it, those are your only options," responded Chris. "Anyway, Chuck, Terry, Dedrek, Stefani, Gretel, Samantha, Johnathan, Ryan, Liz, and..... Nalyd! From here on out, you all shall be known as the Killer Pens!

"What is zis 'pen' of which you're speaking?" Dedrek asked weirdly.

Chris says everything slowly, "A pen... is something... you write............. with."

"... Oh," Dedrek replied.

"Idiot," Ryan said under his breath.

"Hey, don't call him that!" Nalyd and Gretel said together.

"Okay, contestants!" Chris reprimanded. "Now, the first challenge is an obstacle course in Gym class." The camera switched scenes and Chris and the rest were in front of the Gymnasium. Chris opened the doors to reveal the Gym's obstacle course. Everyone looked in awe as Chris explained the rules.

"We have randomly selected one person from each team to complete this obstacle course. They will each run outside 20 yards to the first checkpoint, which is 50 jumping jacks; run back inside to complete the monkey bar portion of the challenge; dive onto the ground to crawl under these ropes and barbed wires; then, finally, run 20 yards again back to the starting line. The winner of this challenge gets invincibility for their team, losing team gets to go vote someone off in our first ever Detention Hall (also called "D-Hall") Ceremony!! Let's see... For the Screaming Pencils, we have... Brandon!"

"What?! Me?! I don't concur with that statement," Brandon blurted out, scared.

"And, for the Killer Pens, we have.... Liz!" Chris continued.

"Booyah, baby!!" Liz shouted, "I'll dominate at this."

Brandon: They're truly going to put me up against that sports monster?! I call conspiracy!

Brandon and Liz are seen at the starting line, at the ready. Chris comes in front of them.

"At the ready... Get set... Go!" Chris said as he blew an air horn.

Liz rocketed out of the starting line, and Brandon struggled with the first part of the course.

"Come on, Brandon!!" Ariel yelled out. He sees that Alyssa wasn't cheering and elbows her.

"Huh? Oh! Yeah! Go, go, Brandon!" Alyssa said after being distracted by Zach.

Unfortunately, their cheers didn't quite cut it as powerhouse Liz finished the entire course in 1 minute and 39 seconds, while Brandon was still struggling with the 20 yard dash, due to his wimpy stature. Chris blew the air horn again.

"Wow. What was that!?" He eyed Brandon.

"I thought we were here to learn more about school education facilities, not this spraggly garbage," Brandon whined.

The entire group of contestants laughed.

"Nope," Chris said, "we can't do that for free, you know. Oh, well, the Killer Pens win it by a landslide! Pencils, I'll be seeing you at the ceremony!"

Johnathan: Well, we're getting off to a good start. (smiles)

Ryan: We lost... ALREADY! I mean, come on! I never lose!

Stefani: Well, we're winning already. And, I can't leave this place. (yawns) Might as well try winning now, I could use the money.

The 10, soon-to-be 9, Screaming Pencils are sitting in Room 666, the Detention Study Hall room; Chris walks in with a tray of golden "A-plus" shapes, made of delicious chocolate and nougat.

"Welcome to Detention, loser Pencils! The procedure for each D-Hall Ceremony is as follows..." He holds up an "A+". "If you get a golden "A+", it means you're safe.... for now; if you do NOT get one, it means it's time for you to get your stuff and get out of this schoolhouse by taking the dreaded Walk of Shame! Anyway, our first Golden A+ goes to Lilie!"

"Right on!" she exclaimed.

"Alyssa, Carter, Jeff, Ariel, you guys are all in the green!" He tosses each of them their Golden A+'s respectively. "Webby, Katherine, Tammi, same for you guys!" After Chris tossed them their A+'s, he began to get serious.

"Zach, Brandon, this is the last A+ of the night.... And, it goes to..................... Zach!"

"Duh," Zach said.

"What can I say, dude? You sucked in this challenge." Chris said, as Brandon stood up from his desk.

Brandon left the Total Drama 101 D-Hall Room without saying a word.

"Awk-ward," Chris and all the other Screaming Pencils said.

"Who will be the next unfortunate, uhhh, "schoolmate", to be cast out of the school? Will we see any hook-ups happen next episode? Will Brandon keep annoying me even though he's officially gone?! Find out about all of this next time on Total.... Drama... 1-0-1," Chris smiled, as the camera faded.

Chapter Two: Vanilla Warfare
Chris was stationed in front of Gilded Glory and began to announce, "Last time on Total Drama 1-0-1, 20 contestants signed up to be on this rundown television show. Many friends were quickly made, relationships may have started, and life-long enemies came in contact with each other. The 20 was soon divided into 2 teams of 10; the Screaming Pencils, and the Killer Pens. Fortunately, for the Killer Pens, they got off to an excellent start with Liz winning the Gym obstacle course challenge, causing the Pencils to cast off 'easy-target' Brandon from their team. We're going back in time this week, and hitting History on another thrilling episode of Total... Drama... 1-0-1!"

Chapter Two started right where Chapter One left off. The remaining contestants were told, by Chris, that they would all live together in one huge mansion right behind the school where the challenges would be located.

"Are you serious?!" Ariel exclaimed. "No way!" Liz and Tammi said simultaneously.

Literally, everyone rushed into the stately mansion and gasped at the decorations and amount of rooms. The mansion consisted of a brick-red exterior with a giant fireburnt-red roof on top, and a golden, rotating image of the Total Drama 101 promotional logo perched on top.

"Oh, my gumdrops!" Terry said, as he saw the inside of the mansion.

Inside the mansion were over 30 rooms, 10 on each floor, with a "Master Room" on the very highest floor of the mansion, each room decorated the same as the last.

"'Master Room', called it!" Nalyd and Ryan both yelled out simultaneously.

When they both heard each other say it, they growled, and ran up the stairs to see who could get their luggage up to the Master Room first, slapping each other on the way up.

"Look at those two fools," Carter said.

"I know, right?" Zach looked at Carter. "Thank God we're all not like that." Zach proceeded to an unclaimed room on the first floor.

"I was going to pick that room," Carter said as he eyed Zach. Zach sighed, "There's a million other rooms here just like this one, just pick one of those!"

Zach: Did you just see that!? What a pain.

Carter: This "Zach" kid is really starting to make me cringe already. Not. Good. For him. (takes out checkbook) I'll buy that room from him if I have to. (an off-screen voice from a TD101 producer yelled out "stubborn") Oh, yeah?! Well, you're a bigger one! (the confessional cut off before Carter could finish)

Tammi pulled out her cellphone and began to text a friend. Webby noticed this, went over to Tammi, and peered over her shoulder to see what Tammi was typing.

"Like, do you mind?" she asked. "Oh, sorry." Webby replied. He went off-screen to find another person. Minutes later, he came back to Tammi and peered over her shoulder even after she said not to look.

"C'mon, kid, a little elbow room, please?" she questioned Webby. "Oh, sorry." Webby replied with the same answer. He stood back a few feet, but, then, for some reason, got into the position a track runner would before running a dash. A few seconds afterwards, Webby took off at full speed, swooping past Tammi, stealing her phone in the process.

"Hey! That's mine!" Tammi shouted, as she chased after Webby.

"Ya can't catch me, ya can't catch me!" Webby yelled as he ran all through the foyer of the mansion. Closing his eyes, he ran everywhere, that is, until he bumped into Alyssa.

"Hey!" Alyssa said. "This isn't yours!" Alyssa took the phone away from Webby, walked over to Tammi, and handed it back to her.

Tammi extended her hand, "Thank you." She took the phone and saw that it was opened to her Digital Calculator tool, where the number '8008' was typed in. "What the heck is this!?" She showed the phone to Webby.

"It says 'eight thousand and eight'," Webby said in a subtle voice. It then turned into a shout, "which looks like the word 'BOOB'!" Webby began laughing as Tammi grunted and marched off an unclaimed room in the mansion.

Tammi: That was pretty nice of Alyssa to get my phone back for me. Hmm, I wonder... (the confessional cuts off)

"I'll take this one," Jeff said.

"I call that one," Katherine shouted, as she pointed to the room right next to Jeff's.

Jeff beamed, "Sweet!"

Samantha looked around and finally found one to her liking, "I'm gettin' this'n!"

"Oh, oh, God, no," Gretel looked at Samantha, then to the cameraman and whispered to him, "I can NOT be near her. She's too crazy." Gretel hurried to the next floor.

Stefani: I read once that the more elevated you are from sea level, the better your performance as a human every day. This could help a lot with these challenges. I wish I were kinda staying in the Master Room, now.

Stefani walked up to the next floor and chose a room up there.

Dedrek looked around and chose the room next to Jeff & Katherine, "Silly Ameri-cahns and their customs."

Terry looked around for a room, and then, locked eyes with Liz on accident.

"Hey!" Liz said to him. "... Hey, there." Terry uneasily said.

"Uh, is something the matter?" Liz looked confused.

"No, no, no, no. I'm good. Uhh, t-thanks on winning yesterday's challenge. You probably saved my butt." Terry spoke out.

"Nah, if I would have lost, my butt would have needed the saving."

Terry laughed, as they talked a little more, and eventually chose rooms.

Only Alyssa, Ariel, Carter, Chuck, and Lilie had yet to choose a room.

Ariel looked at Carter, "Which room are you choosing?"

Carter looked at him as if he were crazy.

Carter: Why is this kid talking to me, of all people!? (flips hair back) I'm too rich to hang with him.

"I'm going up on the second floor," Carter responded. "Alright, I guess I will, too," Ariel said back. "Great," Carter said sarcastically.

Lilie glanced at the remaining rooms left on the first floor.

Lilie: (sighing and looking at a picture of her own home) This place is nothing compared to the manor back home. But, (sighs) it'll have to do.

Lilie followed Alyssa to the second floor and they both chose rooms. Before they had gotten to the second floor, Alyssa looked down at Chuck, who had a cap on, covering his face, and was leaned against the mansion's wall.

"What's wrong with him," Alyssa said to Lilie.

Lilie hummed to herself, ran down the stairs, and went to uncover Chuck's face. She removed the cap only to see that Chuck was leaned against the wall, already asleep. Lilie giggled and ran back up to the second floor with Alyssa, as everyone turned in for the night.

The next morning, a giant thud was heard outside.

"What ze French toast?" Dedrek yelled, as he fell out of his bed.

"No, no! No interruptions, I need my sleep!" Ryan said in the Master Room, waking Nalyd in the process. Ryan eventually got up and followed everyone, who proceeded to leave their rooms and began mumbling over what had just happened.

Terry looked to the left to notice Chuck was still sleeping on the wall. As everyone was walking outside, Terry went over and awakened Chuck.

"Wakey, wakey, eggs & ba-key!" Terry said to him. Chuck jumped up, "Wha-, wha-, huh?" he muttered. He noticed that Terry and the group were walking out the door. Chuck cleared his throat, and followed the gang.

Johnathan opened the main entrance door, and all the schoolmates see a giant white clump of an unknown substance, shaped as if it were "scooped" out of a container.

"Whoa. What do you supposed it is?" Terry asked aloud. Nalyd shook his head at the same time Ryan smacked his.

(Nalyd and Ryan begin having a confessional conversation with the viewer)

Nalyd: I'm surrounded...

Ryan: ...by idiots!

Nalyd: Hmm. Come to think of it,...

Ryan: ...that could work to my advantage.

Nalyd: I've seen this show before, and I know that all you need...

Ryan: ...to get to the top...

Both: (split-screen) ...is an alliance!

Chris appeared in front of the mansion through a puff of blue smoke.

"Welcome to your second challenge, schoolmates!" Chris announced. "Today's subject..." Another scooped white substance fell from the sky, which caused many of the schoolmates to jump. "...is History!" The entire cast looked at Chris, confused.

"Okay, we're going back in time to the Civil War ages! And, when you think of History, you gotta think of the many battles taken place on this Earth! Now, even though we're in Canada, I like this United States battle a lot better. Screaming Pencils, you'll be known as the Northern part of the United States. Killer Pens, you're the South.

"Oh, joy!" Ariel said. "As long as no one gets hurt," Alyssa mentioned, thinking of others.

"Here's how it's gonna work," Chris explained. "There's an uneven amount of people on each team right now, so each team needs to decide on 4 people to participate in the challenge, and the other 5, or 6 in the Pens' case, will just cheer the others on. Oh, and for the record, this white stuff is vanilla ice cream for the slowpokes that couldn't get that right off. You'll be using that, instead of actual bullets! Take a few minutes on each side of the school and talk about who gets to play and who's watching, then meet me in Room 115, one of our History rooms."

The Screaming Pencils went to the west side of the school.

"Oh, oh, oh! Please! I wanna do some shooting!" Katherine said to her team.

"Why not?" Alyssa said. "We could get killed with her wielding a gun!? Ever think of that?" Carter snapped back at her.

"Calm down, we're using vanilla as ammo. I don't think anyone can get hurt with that." Alyssa said as she took out a piece of paper. "Okay, we got Katherine. Any other volunteers?" Alyssa looked at Ariel, who was talking to a bug; Carter, who was writing a check again; Jeff, who was talking with Katherine; Lilie, who was staring back at Alyssa; Tammi, who was back on her cellphone again with a 'Webby, don't touch.' sticker, hanging on it; Webby, who was looking at Zach; and Zach, who was gushing over Alyssa taking control.

Alyssa sighed, "Fine." She randomly wrote down three other names and didn't say who's name was written down.

The Killer Pens were sitting on the east side of the school, talking about. Nalyd suddenly got up.

Nalyd: I'm someone who wants to win a game and get the game done. Do not let the paleness fool you!

Ryan got up right after Nalyd.

Ryan: I'll take the reins whenever I need to. When you want to get something done.... uhh... you get other people to do it for you!

"Terry, Samantha, can I talk to you guys for a second?" Ryan and Nalyd, again, said simultaneously. They both began saying the same thing: "What do you need them for?! Me!? I asked you first! UGH! You can't scoff like me! UGH!!!"

Nalyd went over to Ryan, "If you must know, I'm trying to start an alliance."

Ryan gasped, "That's what I was gonna do, copycat!"

Nalyd looked Ryan up and down, "Yeah, look, I need them more than you do." Ryan scolded, "Like heck you do! I'm getting them first."

"Terry, Samantha?" Ryan and Nalyd said at the same time again. Both Terry and Samantha got up from the other Killer Pens to see what Ryan and Nalyd had wanted.

"Wanna have a--" Ryan and Nalyd started off at the same time. "Ugh!" Nalyd whispered something in Terry's ear, while Ryan did the following with Samantha.

"Sure," they both said back to Ryan and Nalyd.

"Great," Nalyd smiled.

"Omigosh, Terry! You should so join the alliance me and Ryan just started!!" Samantha blabbed out. Ryan smacked his head right after.

Terry: Oh, God. A girl's talking to me. I guess it's best to give her what she wants.

"Sure!" Terry happily agreed.

"Bu--, bu--, what about us?!" Nalyd said arrogantly.

"You can join, too, Mr. Nixon!" Samantha extended her hand. A random record scratch was heard in the distance.

Ryan: (smacks head again) Oh, this won't end well.

Nalyd and Terry both put their hands on top of Samantha's. "Ryan, you in this or what?" Nalyd said, hoping the answer was 'or what?'. Ryan sighed and finally put his hand on top.

"Aw, yeah, baby, this makes us a team," said Samantha.

Ryan and Nalyd: (split-screen) You keep thinking that.

"Captain, called it!" Ryan and Nalyd, yet again, said simultaneously, which caused only Ryan to growl.

Ryan: (referring to Nalyd) He's sooooooo going to pay.

Ryan, Nalyd, Samantha, and Terry returned to the rest of the Killer Pens.

"Where were you guys?" Gretel asked impatiently.

"Slow your roll, nerd," Ryan said, "I was taking care of business. And, this is a part of it. I don't care who you've decided on doing the challenge. I'm changing it to us four!" Ryan pointed to himself and the newfound members of his alliance.

"Who made zis cricket in charge?" Dedrek asked without thinking of what he just said. Ryan gives Dedrek a serious "I'm watching you" look with his hand and eyes. "It's us four, deal with it! I have a plan." Ryan began smiling creepily.

Both teams walked over to History room 115 and opened the door to find an unlimited-looking supply of vanilla ice cream on each side of the room, with 4 green cannon-guns on one side and 4 red cannon-guns on the other side. Chris was seen, sitting in a very tall seat near the ceiling.

"Good. Everyone's here. The rules are as follows: If you get hit with any piece of this ice cream by anyone, you are out. The team of 4 with the last schoolmate standing will all win invincibility for their team! Any questions!? No? Good! Take your positions! For the Screaming Pencils, I have Katherine, Alyssa, Lilie, and Tammi fighting!" Chris smiles, but then opens his eyes wider and looks at the paper Alyssa gave him earlier. "Wait, what?! All girls?"

The Screaming Pencils beamed Alyssa down, as she smiled, "Heh, girl power?" she mouthed.

"Riiiiight," Chris continued, "and for the Killer Pens, I have Terry, Samantha, Nalyd, and Ryan. Wow, I'm surprised you guys aren't using Liz again."

"Yeah, yeah, well, we didn't," Ryan said in a smart-aleck tone.

Chris looks at the Killer Pens team, "Hey, wait. There's 9 people on each team. I specifically said there would be 4 people fighting on each team only because the teams aren't balanced right now! Killer Pens, you missing a player?"

Everyone begins to look around and they all shout out, "Chuck!"

The camera quickly switches scenes to show Chuck snoozing away, again, out on the east side of the school where the Pens just were.

Johnathan looks out a window to see Chuck asleep, "It's okay, he's not competing in this challenge. Just let him sleep."

"Alright, there's one more feature to this game that I have NOT introduced to you guys yet." Chris said, as he held up a light blue slip with writing on it.

"What's that?" Carter asked from the Pencils' side.

"This, my schoolchildren, is a Hall Pass. But, this is no ordinary Hall Pass. This slip of paper guarantees it's owner invincibility for the challenge they are currently participating in, whether they win... or not." Everyone began to gasp over the paper's power.

Chris continued, "Yep. Each challenge I will either drop, hide, or find some other way to put this Hall Pass in challenge grounds where one lucky participant can get it. In this case, since I'm so high up, I'll drop it down. If you get it, it's yours. The only way it can be someone else's is if you willingly give it away. The Hall Pass isn't that hard to understand, it's just very powerful. I won't give you any warning on when I drop this thing, or for any other challenges, so keep your eyes peeled."

Chris cleared his throat, "On your mark...," the camera went to the Pencils', locked and loaded.

".... get set," the camera went to the Pens', locked and loaded.

"GO!!"

It was Alyssa, Katherine, Lilie, and Tammi against Ryan, Nalyd, Samantha, and Terry. Katherine fired first, but missed out.

"Take this!" Ryan screamed as he fired, trying to hit Lilie, to no avail.

"Fire in the hole!" Terry shouted. He shot a giant scoop of ice cream at Lilie and succeeds.

"Awww..." Lilie said as she stepped away from the battlefield.

Alyssa flings a scoop at Terry and succeeds, "Eat on that, chump," she said.

"Enough of this!" Samantha yelled. She grabbed her gun and began rapidly shooting, hitting Alyssa and Katherine in the process.

"Go, Samantha!" Johnathan said from the sidelines.

Ryan noticed that Nalyd was barely holding his gun, hardly doing anything but looking at Alyssa, covered in ice cream.

Samantha was looking behind her, checking to see if no one was at her rear. Tammi took this opportunity to attack Samantha after the barrage she just did, and shot her with ice cream. Samantha was out.

Tammi was all that was left on the Pencils' side, and Ryan & Nalyd were left on the Pens' side. The Screaming Pencils faintly began chanting Tammi's name, hoping that she'd win.

Ryan turned around only to notice that Nalyd, again, wasn't doing anything or shot at anyone.

Ryan: I couldn't just let that dork win this challenge with the rest of us by doing nothing. Ryan doesn't roll that way.

Just then, Chris dropped the fatal Hall Pass, Ryan looked up, jumped up similar to a ninja, and grabbed the hall pass, crashing onto the floor and tumbling into the Screaming Pencils' territory. While Ryan was tumbling, he hit Tammi, knocking her gun out of her hands.

"Yes! This game is ours!" Gretel said from the sidelines. "Look out, dude!" Jeff said to Tammi. Tammi stayed there, cowering in fear.

Ryan looked at his gun, then to his other hand with the Hall Pass clutched in it, then to Nalyd, who was looking back at Ryan.

Ryan stupidly aimed his gun at Nalyd, "Bye-bye, Nixon!" he chimed. Nalyd, seeing that he was about to get attacked by his own teammate, grabbed his gun, aimed at Ryan and shot him at him right when he shot at Nalyd. Both were hit. The sideline viewers looked in awe over what had just happened.

"Oh, gosh, I can't believe I'm saying this, but Tammi, along with Alyssa, Katherine, Lilie, and the Screaming Pencils win this challenge! Sadly, Pens, I'll be seeing you at our Detention Hall Ceremony."

Ryan: That should teach him.

Nalyd: He's so unpredictable. (shrugs)

Stefani: We lost. Over what?! An inconsiderate, little beast with a problem! He should be the one going home, but he's invincible with that stupid Hall Pass.

Webby: Did we even earn that win?

Jeff: (stares into the confessional camera and sighs)

Ryan: People thought I was stupid to do what I did to Nalyd. But, who cares?! The little nub deserved it. Besides, I'm invincible, and, all I needed were a few votes agains-- (the confessional cuts off)

At the Detention Hall ceremony, everyone casts their votes.

Chris, at the front of the classroom, "...And the Golden A+'s go to.... Stefani.

Chris continued, "Samantha, Terry, Nalyd, and Liz," Chris threw them their A+'s, "you're also safe." Each cheered respectively. "Ryan, Dedrek," he said, throwing more A+'s, "well done."

A spotlight shined on Gretel, Johnathan, and an empty seat. Chris looked, "Who will it be? Who will be leaving us tonight? Our loser is.......................... Chuck!!" The camera zoomed in on the empty seat. "Okay, where the heck is Chuck?" Chris stepped down from his podium, looked out the Detention Hall windows and saw Chuck, awake, but leaning on the school wall. "God, there is a such thing as 'too cool', people."

"Chuck!" Chris yelled down, "You've been voted out!"

Chuck shrugged his shoulders, took a bit out of an apple he had, threw it down and walked away from the premises.

"Yet another awkward elimination! Who will be the owner of the next one?! You'll have to tune in for the next episode of Total... Drama... 1-0-1!" Chris announced as the camera faded.

Chapter Three: Dramatron
"Last time on Total Drama 1-0-1: We decided to pay respects to our forefathers and go to History class!" Chris announced. "We went back to Civil War ages where the Screaming Pencils were the North side of the United States, and the Killer Pens were the South! Ryan and Nalyd kinda started an alliance, and now, it looks like they're co-leaders. However, in the end of it all, thanks to Ryan's scheming, the win was given to the Screaming Pencils! Meanwhile, as things seemed to come to an end for Ryan, he remembered the coveted Hall Pass that was in his hand, and he convinced his and Nalyd's alliance to vote out cool-guy Chuck! It's Robot time this episode, find out who becomes the next unfortunate schoolmate right here on Total... Drama... 1-0-1!"

After the theme song played, the camera faded into Katherine's room. Katherine was seen exercising to "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne. A knock on the door was heard, and in entered Jeff.

"Jeff!" Katherine said.

"Turn that racket down!" Ryan said from his and Nalyd's Master Room. Katherine turned the music off.

"Hey, babe," Jeff said excitedly, "I'm kinda glad you're up. You see, I was thinking about--"

An airhorn was heard blaring outside. "All schoolmates report to Room 308, the Robotics room, this instant," Chris yelled into a megaphone from the Robotics room in the school.

"Hmm. Tell me whatever it is later tonight, kay, babe?" Katherine said, smiling.

"Okay," Jeff muttered, looking down, now.

Jeff: Wrong. Stupid. Time, Chris.

Tammi awoke from hearing the air-horn. "Ugh, I'm going to end up taking that thing from him. I'm not going to be listening to that all season." She dragged herself out of her room and proceeded to the school. Carter, later opened his door, and went down, as well. Before he could reach the entrance door of the mansion, he heard Zach still snoozing away in the room he wanted.

Carter ferociously banged on his door, "Get up, you lazy sack!" Carter heard a giant thud come from the room, "Hmm, he must have fell," he laughed as he left the mansion and headed to the school.

After everyone rose from their beds, they went to the Robotics classroom, to wait on Chris's explanation of the challenge.

Johnathan looked at Ariel, "You sleep well?"

"No, not really. I kept dreaming that robots were going to take over the world." Ariel said back to Johnathan.

Just then, a giant robot, shaped to resemble Chris, appeared behind him and tapped his shoulder. Ariel turned around quickly with his eyes closed.

"Yes, kind person?" Ariel said. He opened his eyes to see the robot behind, and literally jumped out of his pants and shoes and clinged to the Robotics classroom ceiling. All he had on at the time was a shirt, socks, and underwear.

"My dream's coming true!" Ariel cried. Everyone but Johnathan began to laugh at Ariel. Chris's robot opened his head to reveal that he was inside the robot, controlling it.

"That was too worth it!" Chris said. "Ariel! You can come down now, it's okay! However, you may not like our challenge today! It's an all-out robot battle!"

"Lame," Ryan responded. Chris looked at him, "So's your mother."

"What?" Ryan said.

"Huh?" Chris asked, knowing what he just said.

Chris: It's just too easy, now! I think these newbies are trying to set jokes up for me!

"Can you explain the challenge now, Chris?" Liz asked, impatiently.

"I don't care how you do it, but each team needs a robot, big or small, to compete against the robot of the other team's. It can't be a robot like mine, you can't control it while being inside the robot. There needs to be one person controlling each team's robot. Look out for the Hall Pass, and the controller whose robot takes the other down will win invincibility for their team!" Chris looked at the Screaming Pencils, then the Killer Pens, then, in a robot voice, said, "Get-to-work-on-mak-ing-your-ro-ro-ro-ro-ro-ro-bots."

The camera faded and came back to see the Killer Pens, looking around the Robotics classroom for robot pieces.

"Will this work?" Terry said, holding up a bent golf club.

"We're going to build a robot, not swing for an albatross," Stefani replied, taking the club away from him.

"What's an 'albatross'?" Gretel asked Johnathan. "Beats me," he said back.

"It's a--" Stefani started.

"Will you guys please get back to work?!" Ryan interrupted the group.

"Geez. Pushy," Liz said under her breath. "What was that?!" Ryan said, looking at Liz.

Liz finally stood up, a good foot taller than Ryan, "It's whatever I wanted to have said, kay?"

The devil nearly wet his pants, "Okay..." he said, scared. While the Killer Pens kept looking for robot parts, Dedrek got away from the Killer Pens, and took his own cellphone out.

Dedrek: While they look for parts to a robot, (grabs phone) I'm going to call in a good... favor. (on phone) 'Allo, mother.

Back at the Screaming Pencils side, Katherine was looking for some robot parts when Jeff came over to her, again, "Hey, can I talk to you?" he asked.

"Ooooooooooooooh!" Ariel and Zach both cooed.

"Sure," Katherine said, smiling. Jeff pulled Katherine away from the group.

"As I was saying, you know, earlier, there's something I've been thinking about since the minute I saw you a few days ago. I, uhh... dude, this isn't easy for m--" Jeff stopped talking, as Katherine put her finger on his mouth.

"It's obvious, dude. Now... not another word," Katherine said seductively. Jeff's eyes grew wide over the tone of the response, Katherine came in closer to him, and both of them shared a kiss.

"Aweeeeeeeeeee!" Ariel and Zach, again, said together. Jeff began to smile and Katherine started blushing. Tammi looked in awe at the entire display.

Tammi: I'm a nice girl. A very nice girl. But, this nice girl also knows what it takes to win. And, (referring to Jeff & Katherine now being in a relationship) it's those kinds of things that are going to stop this girl from winning. The only way to counter those kinds of things, is to start a (air-quoted) "thing" of your own.

Tammi threw her eyes at Alyssa and Zach. "Alyssa, Zach, can I talk to the two of you?" she smiled at the both of them. Both Alyssa & Zach left their team looking for usable robot parts, while they went to tend to Tammi.

"You're interesting in winning this game, aren't you?" Tammi asked Alyssa.

"I guess. I was going to use my winnings for an animal shelter. "Cool, and you?" Tammi looked at Zach.

"Sure!" Zach said.

"Well, our team is huge right now, so people are about to be getting picked off one-by-one until things get serious. Now, I don't want you two to lose so early. Heck, I don't want you to lose at all." Tammi said, smiling at them.

Tammi: I think I could make it as a lawyer. I'm great at lying!

"Anyway," she continued. "If we don't band together, we might be the people that they want to pick off one by one. So, what do you say?" Tammi put her hand in the air, face-down, "Partners?" Alyssa and Zach looked at each other.

Alyssa started at Zach, "She does bring up some good points. What are you thinking?"

"I'm probably going to do whatever you do, I'm not sure," Zach said back.

"Think about it, guys. I can very well take you into the Final 3," Tammi told them both in a singsong voice, smiling.

Alyssa looked at Tammi's hand, and put hers down on top of it, "I want in."

Zach does the same, "So do I."

"Excellent," Tammi mumbled.

Tammi: Man, I am good!

Alyssa: I think this will really be good for me. Tammi's a nice person, I think. And, I trust Zach. (blushes a bit) A lot.

Zach: Yes! An alliance!! Sounds like a ticket to the Finals, baby!!

Tammi, Alyssa, and Zach return to the rest of the Screaming Pens to help with making a robot.

"Where were you guys?" Webby asked.

"Here, there, everywhere," Tammi responded. "We gotta get this robot done.

Carter looked in a bin, searching for a certain part, "Ugh, this is disgusting. I do not have to do this!" Carter went away from the Screaming Pens and took his cellphone out.

Carter: (mid-way through a conversation on his phone) ... Yes, yes, one human-sized robot. Uh-huh. $135,000? Not a problem. (takes out coveted checkbook as the confessional cuts off)

Chris blows his airhorn again. "Everyone ready!?"

"Sorry, Chris," Johnathan started. "Our team could hardly put a robot together. These hand-me-down parts are terrible in this room!"

"Oh, zis is not a problem, for I have thought a-head!" Dedrek announced. "Drop it, now, pleez," he said into his phone.

Suddenly, a giant human-size red robot and it's controller literally crashed through the ceiling and landed on the Robotics classroom floor. Dedrek catches the robot's controller.

"I didn't say you couldn't call in favors," Chris said. The Pens began cheering, as the Pencils started jeering.

Carter began to listen to his team call unfair play. He finally said, "Team, team, not to worry. I called in a favor, too." He got on his cellphone, "Whenever you're ready." Seconds later, a giant human-sized green robot made another hole in the ceiling, and fell to the floor, along with a controller, which fell into Carter's hands.

"Let's rock!!" Carter said, as all of the Screaming Pencils began cheering.

"Oh, this is going to be more interesting than I thought. Carter vs. Dedrek!! Money vs. Frenchy! Let's do this!" Chris got back into his own Chris robot, "Commence!!"

(Let the record show that the actions Carter and Dedrek are doing are from their robots; however, it is Carter and Dedrek when they are seen talking.

Carter immediately got the first hit by punching Dedrek's chest, "Take that, you trollop!" he murmured. Dedrek went down.

"C'mon, get it up!" Ryan scolded.

"That's what she said last night with Ryan," Nalyd said to Liz, making her laugh and Ryan growl.

Dedrek laid there, and used this opportunity to unleash his Jet Boots. Both of Dedrek's feet rocketed off his legs and immediately pulverized Carter, "Zat is how we do it in my... how you say... 'neighborhood'!" Carter immediately charged at Dedrek. He came up to Dedrek's body and slapped his face.

"What was that?!" Dedrek yelled. "A slap. Duh?" Carter said back to him. Dedrek became enraged with Carter and slapped him back. Obviously, a slap-fight came up after this.

"C'mon, get serious!" Katherine yelled out. At that point, one of Carter's slaps turned into a mach punch, and sent Dedrek flying. Dedrek did not get up for minutes.

"Sacre bleu, you hunk'o'junk! Get up!! Get up and fight!" Dedrek said.

The Screaming Pencils began cheering. Chris threw down the coveted Hall Pass, again.

"Ohhhhh, no, it's mine this time!!" Dedrek said. He jumped up and grabbed the Hall Pass right when Chris throws it down.

"Well, it was quicker than I thought it was, but Carter & the Screaming Pencils are our victors!! Killer Pens, I'll be seeing you at the D-Hall Ceremony, again.

Carter: Chalk one of the hundreds of wins I'm going to do in this competition. Oh, yes, Carter's coming for ya.

Ryan: We lost, and it's all Frenchy's fault!! Ugh! I would tell the alliance to boot him, but (mocks) he's invincible!

Dedrek: Sacre bleu, sacre bleu!! I don't know what could have happened!!

The Killer Pens were seen sitting in the Detention Hall Ceremony, casting their votes again.

An off-screen intern hands Chris the votes, "And, the Golden A+'s go to..... first of all, Samantha." He threw Samantha her Golden A+.

"Next up is... Stefani, Nalyd, and Ryan!!" The A+'s were thrown respectively. "Along with Dedrek, who was invincible all along, Johnathan, and Terry!"

Gretel gasped over not having a Golden A+, the camera moves over to Liz, who was sweating buckets.

"Gretel, Liz," this is the final A+ of the evening. The camera zooms in on Gretel & Liz respectively. "And, it goes to...................................... Gretel!!!" Chris through Gretel her Golden A+, but Gretel, putting her head down, sneezed and got hit in the head with the A+.

Liz got up from her seat. "Sorry, Liz," Chris started. "But, you seemed to be a threat to Nalyd & Ryan, so Ryan gotcha good."

"What?!" Liz looked at Ryan, who was jerkily waving goodbye to Liz. "Oh, well," Liz slammed the door behind her and left the school establishment.

"I really wasn't expecting you to get rid of her," Chris eyed Ryan.

"Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do." Ryan responded to Chris. The team (excluding Nalyd & Ryan's alliance) stared Ryan down. "What?!" he scolded.

"That does it for this episode!" Chris said. "Our sports superstar, Liz, has left the building. Who's gonna be next you, ask? Find out, on the next thrilling and filling episode of Total... Drama... 1-0-1!!" The camera began to fade.

Chapter Four: McLean's Math Maze Meltdown
The camera fades in to Chris, standing in front of the school, "Last time on Total Drama 1-0-1: Schoolmates put their nerd skills to the ultimate test with our robot rumble challenge in Robotics class. "Relationships were made...", Chris said as scenes of Jeff and Katherine kissing each other were shown, "...And, alliances were drawn." A scene of Tammi making an alliance with Alyssa and Zach was shown. "Due to the rest of the schoolmates totally sucking at building a robot for battle, the two most unlikely schoolmates, Dedrek & Carter, called in favors and bought a couple robots for a rumble. In the end, Carter whipped Dedrek's robo-butt, and, just when it was looking like a flop for Dedrek, he grabbed the coveted Hall Pass, sending Ryan's Alliance to vote out big-threat Liz!" Chris continued, "Who will be the next unfortunate schoolmate to leave this amazing school? When are Jeff and Katherine gonna kiss again? And, who will win the promising one million dollars!? Find out now, on Total.... Drama.... 1-0-1!"

After the theme song played, the remaining 17 schoolmates were in the Cafeteria area of the school, getting served by Chef Hatchet. "I was wondering where you were. It's been about a month, and we haven't seen you," Johnathan said as he went up to Chef, who just grumbled and served him some slop. Johnathan goes over to sit with the remaining Killer Pens. He sits next to Samantha, who is turned, listening to Ryan and Nalyd's instructions about their next maneuver. "Got it?" Ryan asked. "Yes, sir." Samantha responded, saluting crazily. "Sir, yes, sir." Terry said, trying to outdo Samantha. "I like the touch, kid," Ryan responded back, as he went away from them to go to the bathroom.

Terry: So, our next maneuver is to eliminate the next biggest threat. I hope they are too mad at us after this. (frowns)

Dedrek was seen talking, next to Gretel. "So, what's it like being... vous (you)?" Dedrek asked. "Well, it's not really hard," Gretel said, snorting, "I'm just me." "Interesting..." Dedrek said, sarcastically.

Dedrek: .... Not!!

"What about you?" Gretel asked. "Well, what you see is really what you get, just a regular guy... how you say, 'born' in France." Dedrek responded, smiling over his nation. "You were born in France? I'm wanted in France!" Gretel said, also smiling. "Sacre bleu! How can you be wanted in such a nation?" Dedrek asked. Gretel mumbled, "..... Accidentally killing someone who told me they were born in France." Dedrek's eyes became as wide as golf balls. He stood up from his seat, while Gretel had her head down, and ran away from her like lightning.

Over at the Screaming Pencils' table, Tammi was toying around with her cellphone. "Stupid school. What kind of school cafeteria has no service!? Tammi exclaimed. "Lots of them?" Webby looked at her, as if she were crazy. "I wasn't asking you." She snapped back. "Then, who were--" Webby was interrupted.  "Enough!" Tammi said to him.  The camera went over to Jeff, who was trying to romance Katherine.  He had a flower in his hand. "She loves me.... She loves me more.... She loves me, also....," Jeff said seductively to Katherine, picking off a flower pedal with each pause.  Katherine began to giggle.  Carter stared at the two of them. "Look at them, so lovey-dovey." Carter scowled. "Awe, it's cute!" Zach said, smiling and sitting down with his food next to Carter. "Yeah, so is vomit. It's just adorable." Carter responded. After a while, he broke out a radio, turned it on, and dance party music began to play.  Jeff immediately stopped picking pedals off and began to dance like a wild animal, which made Katherine laugh even more, as she joined him. Ariel had just got his food tray from Chef when the music came on, "Dance party!!" he yelled out, throwing his tray of food in the air.  Seconds later, Ryan had came from out of the bathroom, and Ariel's tray of food landed in his hair.  Ryan growled and marched back into the bathroom, annoyed.  Carter shut the party music off, so he could hear Ryan's muffled complaining from in the cafeteria bathroom.

Ryan: (in cafeteria bathroom, referring to Ariel) (bleep) (bleeeeeeep) (bleeep) sloppy jo (bleep) (bleeeeep) Rosie O'Donnell-looking (bleeeeeeeeep).

The entire school of teens began to laugh at Ryan. As Ryan was coming back into the cafeteria, Chris was walking into it, as well, wearing a giant division sign costume. Chris began to open his mouth to explain the challenge, but was cut off by everyone else. "Great. Math-time.  Ugh... My head's already hurting," Ryan shouted out. "What's so bad about Math? It's easy." Lilie said to Ryan. "Yeah, but the difference between me and you is that I have a life." Ryan said back to her, smiling. Lilie frowned, began to ignore Ryan and listened to Chris for further instructions. "After you finish breaky," he began, "you are to report to Room 104, one of our Mathematic classrooms! See ya there, and be prepared for a wonderful challenge filled with twists and turns!" "Great." Nalyd said, blandly.

Alyssa: I gotta say, I'm a little worried about this challenge. Math isn't my strongest suit. The only thing I really know is that 2 + 2 = 4. Ariel: I was pretty stoked about the Math challenge. Math is one of my favorite subjects, I think I can really help the team out! Carter: This should be a piece of cake. All Math is, is numbers without money signs. I've been practically adding numbers all my life. (camera zooms in on Carter) But, what about subtracting? And, (gasps sharply) multiplication?! And, ''(gasps again) division!? (shakes) Dedrek: I barely know how to speak the language of the American, now I have to do... how you say.... 'math', like an American!? Gretel: If you add up all of my dental records, subtract it from the number of countries I'm wanted in, and multiply it by 2.5, you get my mom's age. (short pause) Yep... she's that old. Jeff: Math. Hmm... (writes down the problem of "2 + 2 = ?" on a piece of paper) Let's see, (mumbles to himself) 2 plus 2 e-- Hmmmm.... (A "2 Hours Later" sign appears) Hmmmm.... (rips up paper) I don't know!!!! Johnathan: Math. Not the best subject out there, but, I'll give it a shot! Katherine: Our team is definitely going to win. Math is my most favoritest subject! I'm crazy for it.... Well, actually, I'm crazy for anything, but you get the picture! Lilie: (head held high) This should be easy. Math is a principle, a life attribute itself. You need it....... and I have it. (smiles) Nalyd: Hmm... Math. I'm decent in it, so, let's see where this goes. (says to self) The Pythagorean Theorem states tha-- (gets cut off) Ryan: I don't have TIME for Math in life! (points finger in camera) You guys better not screw this challenge up! Samantha: (puts a bomb on the confessional's table) One bomb... (puts another on the table) plus one bomb.... (the bomb explode in her face) equals BOOM-BOOM!! (laughs maniacally) Tammi: (still trying to get service on her phone, does so for the entire time she's in the confessional) Terry: Maybe I could impress a girl with my superior Math skills! Let's do this! Webby: Math? Now? Whatever, let's go. Our team's winning for sure. Zach: (stares blankly into space for a few seconds, later awakened from trance) Huh? Oh. Hey....... What am I doing in here? (cut off)

Later, everyone is seen present in the Math classroom, 104. Chris inspects them all, "It seems we have 9 Screaming Pencils... and 8 Killer Pens. Close enough.  You all will participate in this challenge." "What challenge? You haven't told us anything," Johnathan spoke out. "Patience, my child," Chris told him. He, then, opened a back door to the Math room to reveal a giant maze (the viewer sees it from bird's eye view) 50 times the size of the schoolmates. "I hope you've got good puzzle skills!" Chris told them. "In order to win today's challenge, you must find your way out of this gigantic maze, by solving math problems to get to where you need to go. Now, there are many turns and different types of ways that could either lead you to dead ends or the finish line.  It depends on which way you choose.  But, here's the thing.  There are multiple pedestals with math problems along the way of this maze.  There are only 3 pedestals that you have to follow in order to get out of the maze, the rest lead you either in circles or into dead ends.  At the beginning, you will all encounter the first pedestal problem, but you will have to choose either to go left or right at each pedestal.  One's correct, the other, not so much.  If you choose to stop and complete the math problems, depending on which pedestal you are on, you get to shave off a certain number of minutes off of your total time after you finish the maze. You can choose to skip the math problems if they are too hard or if you just don't want to do them, but every decision you make must be a team effort! I cannot stress that enough, people. Everything must be completely agreed upon by the whole team. The team that finishes in the fastest time, with the math problem bonuses factored in wins immunity from tonight's D-Hall Ceremony. Losers to go the ceremony, duh."

The scene cut to the Screaming Pencils on one side of the maze entrance, and the Killer Pens on another side of the same maze entrance, with Chris in between them. "On your marks.... get set..... MAZE!" Chris announced. Both teams rocket out of the starting gate, and both come to Pedestal 1 (Both). "13 x 13?" Jeff announced to the Pencils, picking up one of the pieces of paper, and Samantha announced to the Pens, picking up the other. "169, duh." Katherine said to Jeff. Jeff writes the solution down and flips the paper over. "5 minutes! We get 5 minutes off our total time! Now... Which way do we go?" The camera goes over to the Killer Pens. "I think it's 169!" Nalyd shouted out. "Great work, dude! That's right!" Terry patted him on the back after speaking. He runs over and writes '169' on Samantha's paper and flips it over. "It says 5 minutes. This means we get 5 minutes off our time." "I say we go right," Carter told the Pencils. "Right just sounds... I dunno, 'right'?" "Fine with me," Tammi said. Jeff takes the paper with the problem on it, and the Screaming Pencils advance past the Killer Pens to the right of the fork in the road. "They're going right!" Gretel announced. "What was your first clue?" Ryan snapped back at her. "Let's go right, too." Stefani later came up to catch up with her team, "Oh, what a beautiful, sunshiny day!!" She said, smiling creepily. "What's gotten into her... and where has she been?" Nalyd thought out loud. Stefani began dancing around in the maze on her toes around her team, humming to a random song. "Can somebody grab Princess Stefani, so we can get going!?" Ryan demanded. Stefani looked up and gazed into the sky, as Samantha picked her up. Right when the Killer Pens were about to go right, the Screaming Pencils looped back around to the first pedestal and went to the left direction. "Dead-end!" Ariel said, as his team past the Killer Pens again. Tammi smacked him as they continued running, "Don't tell them that!"

The Screaming Pencils ran ahead with the Killer Pens right behind them. Due to the Killer Pens' speed, they pass the Screaming Pencils and make it to the second pedestal. Dedrek goes up and grabs one of the problems, "What does zis garbage read?" Nalyd snatches the paper and reads it aloud: "What is... 8 cubed plus 14 squared divided by 2 (83 + 142 ÷ 2)?" Nalyd looks as his team from left to right, as crickets began to chirp in the background, "Anyone!?" Ryan looked at Gretel and pushed her, "You're the Multiplication Woman, you figure it out!" "Right! I'll go find a calculator!" Gretel shouted out. "Wait, wait, no!" Ryan said, though it was too late. Gretel ran out of the maze, away from her team to look for a calculator. "We're screwed," Samantha said, "especially when we could have told her the answer is '354'." A record scratch was heard in the background, as the Killer Pens stared at Samantha.

At that point in time, the Screaming Pencils had came up behind the Killer Pens and grabbed their problem, seeing it was the same one. "Anyone good with exponents without a calculator?" Alyssa asked. "I wish," Webby said, "anyone at all?" Webby looked at everyone. They then began to look up in the sky or down at the ground to avoid the posed question.

Over at the Killer Pens', the staring game was still going on, as everyone was still eyeing Samantha. "How did you know that!?" everyone asked Samantha at once. "Isn't it obvious?" Samantha told them, still carrying Stefani. "Oh, yeah, no, yeah," Ryan said quickly to her, "it was super obvious. We just decided to stay here and stand for a few extra minutes because we love looking at paper!! Let's get going!  The Screaming Pencils are skipping this question!" Johnathan wrote down the answer, flipped the paper over and saw that it read "10 minutes". "We've got a total of... 15 minutes deducted from our time. I think the other team only have 5!" Johnathan declared.

The Screaming Pencils went 'left' on the fork in the road. Ryan was about to run after them but Dedrek and Nalyd stopped him by grabbing his neck. "Dude," Johnathan started, "we have to wait on Gretel. We have to finish as a team." "Ugh... Fine, fine, fine!" Ryan yelped.

A few minutes had passed, and the Screaming Pencils had not looped back around to the second pedestal, telling the Killer Pens that the direction they chose wasn't a dead-end that time. "It's been 10 minutes! She'll catch up, let's just leave the little nerdling!" Ryan shouted. Everyone, but Johnathan, followed Ryan to the 'left' path of the second pedestal. Johnathan looked behind him to see if Gretel were coming up, got no response, and decided to follow his team, leaving her wherever she was.

Johnathan: Bad? Of course I felt bad. I didn't want to leave her. Everyone needed to be together in this challenge. (scratches head) Where could she be?

The Screaming Pencils had been at the third and final pedestal for minutes now, trying to figure out the last problem.

Webby: We're finally at the end. Last problem. I think we may actually be able to win now!

Zach had the paper at this point, and was repeating the problem to himself, "3X + 5 = 2X - 7(2X +5), 3X + 5 = 2X - 7(2X +5), 3X + 5 = 2X - 7(2X +5)...." Ariel took the paper from him and saw that it was an Algebra problem. He reached for a pencil at the pedestal but noticed that there weren't any at the final one. "I'm good with Algebra, but I need a pencil or something! I can't do this in my head!!"

While the Screaming Pencils tried to help Ariel look for a pencil, the Killer Pens caught up to them, and took their problem. "Oh, butter... Algebra," Samantha said. Samantha placed Stefani down to take a rest. "Loo-loo-lah-lah, looloo-loo-lah-lah," Stefani mumbled with a blank expression on her face.

Terry: I'm starting to worry about Stefani. She seems so... (bleep)ed up right now.

Johnathan looked at the paper, grabbed it, and whispered in Nalyd's ear what he thought the answer was. "You sure about this?" Nalyd interrogated him. Johnathan shook his head 'yes'. Nalyd gave him a thumbs up and reached for a pencil, but also noticed there weren't any at the pedestal. "How are we supposed to write the answer down to this one with no pencil!?" Ryan asked. Nalyd flipped the paper over to see that it read "0 minutes". "Guys, guys," he whispered so the other team next to him wouldn't hear it, "I don't think it matters. Even with the right answer, we don't get any minutes shaved off our time.  We need to get to the finish line." Everyone shook their heads and the Killer Pens went through a straight-away to the finish line. The Killer Pens crossed the finish line where Chris was. He does a head count, but Ryan notices that he didn't stop the stopwatch he had in his hand. "Hey! Aren't ya gonna stop that thing?!" Ryan said. Chris had no response, as he looked up the maze to see if the Screaming Pencils were finishing up.

Back at the third pedestal, everyone was still looking for a pencil so Ariel could fill the answer in. Oddly, Jeff was looking on the ground trying to find one, while everyone else was checking their pockets. Jeff continued to search the ground, and actually came across the coveted Hall Pass. He takes it without anyone seeing, and stuffs it into his pants pocket, "Nothin' over here, dudes." It was at this point that Webby took the paper, flipped it over to see the "0 Minutes" inscription on the back. "Hey, guys! There's no time at stake here!" Webby said, looking confused. "What do you mean?" Carter asked, walking towards Webby. Webby shows Carter the reading, to which Carter responds with an "Oh." "Let's go, then!" Zach said, as he took the paper and ran. Jeff kept the Hall Pass tucked away in his pocket, grabbed and picked up Katherine, and ran towards the finish line with the other Screaming Pencils.

All of the Screaming Pencils cross the finish line, and Chris stops the stopwatch at that point to document the time. "21:51 (21 minutes and 51 seconds)! Amazing time, Screaming Pens!" he announced. Then, nothing was heard but the vibrations of silence. "Hey, what gives?" Webby asked. "We have to wait on the Killer Pens to finish, Webby," Chris told him. Webby looked over to the Killer Pens, who were looking back at him. "What are you talking about? They're right there," Ariel interjected to Chris. "True. They are right there, but not all of them.  They're short one Pen." Chris said. "I told you guys... Teamwork is the key here."

Five minutes had past as the Killer Pens waited on Gretel.

Dedrek: How the (bleep) hard is it to find a pencil?? Terry: Hmm... Maybe she got lost in the maze. Then again, that was the simplest maze I've ever been in. Johnathan: Anytime, now.

The camera fades in to see everyone minus Gretel after 10 minutes. The Screaming Pens were all huddled together, sleeping. Over at the Killer Pens group, Dedrek was looking at the dirt below, Johnathan was exercising, Samantha was staring at the Sun for enjoyment, Stefani was making gun shapes with her hands and fake-shooting into the sky, Terry was watching her with awe, and Ryan was sleeping. Little did Ryan know, he fell asleep on Nalyd. One by one, everyone looked down at the two. Finally, all the Pens said, "Awwwwe! That's so sweet!" The Screaming Pencils remained asleep, but Ryan woke up to see nothing but a gray hoodie, looked to his right, and saw Nalyd snoozing away. Ryan let out a girly scream, which woke Nalyd up, causing him to shriek. "Get off of me!" Ryan told Nalyd, who snapped back with saying, "But, you're on me." "You have no idea... how wrong... that sounded," Ryan told him. At that point, Gretel ran out of the maze, and to the finish line. Chris woke up, and finally stops the stopwatch. "31:52 (31 minutes and 52 seconds), that is just sad." Chris eyed Gretel. "It's not my fault! I got lost in the maze. Oh, and here's your pencil," Gretel said to Chris after she gave Ryan the pencil. "I don't want this, and yes, that's does make it your fault! Ugh!! I'm on a team of losers!!" Ryan yelled out.

"Before you get your panties in a knot, Ryan, you're forgetting about the Math Problems. I need to check the answers, so someone from each team needs to give the papers up to me." Ryan & Zach, then, handed Chris the 3 math problem papers from each team. "Okay... It looks like you both got the first one, so 5 minutes off each team's time.  Killer Pens, you're the only team that stayed and did the second one, so 10 more minutes off your time, and it seems you all found out my little gag at the third problem.  So, Screaming Pencils, you get 5 minutes off, Killer Pens you get 15.  And, that means... Screaming Pencils! Your final time is 16:51 (16 minutes and 51 seconds).  Killer Pens, after calculations... It seems that your final time is... 16:52 (16 minutes and 52 seconds)!!  We have our winners by one second!! The Screaming Pencils!!  Killer Pens, I'll be seeing you at the next Detention Hall Ceremony...... again!" The Screaming Pencils were still asleep and did not even hear the fact that they won. "You can't be serious." Ryan said to Chris. "Oh. I be serious. Numbers don't lie, my friend," he replied. At that point, the Killer Pens gasped and began to stare at Gretel. Gretel looked up, "What?!" she said, frowning.

At the Detention Hall Ceremony, the Killer Pens sat down again for another voting session. "Wait," Johnathan said to Chris, "who got the Hall Pass?" "Oh, someone from the other team. You know?  The constantly WINNING team!?  The team that knows how to stomp you guys down into bits!?" Chris gloated. "Oh..." Johnathan said, sadly. "The votes are in!" Chris said. "The first Golden A+ goes to Johnathan! Job well done." Johnathan caught the award, "Nice!" "Dedrek, Samantha, and Terry are also safe!" Chris announced, and respective threw Golden A+'s. Chris looks at Stefani, who is still in her loopy stage right now, gets out a Golden A+ and said, "You know, I really don't trust her catching this, so can someone catch this for her? I'm scared to throw it at her." "I gotcha." Johnathan said. Chris threw Stefani's award to Johnathan, who passed it along until it reached Stefani's desk. "..... Prettyyyyyy," Stefani said when the award reached her. Chris began to get serious, "Riiiiiight, with only three people remaining... Tonight's loser is......................................... GRETEL!!!" "Not much of a shocker," he added in there. Gretel stood up from her seat and walked down the Walk of Shame.

Ryan: Removing more of the deadweight, pound by pound. (evil chuckle)

The camera switches to Chris standing outside of the school, as Gretel left it silently, "And there ya have it. 101 says goodbye to one of it's nerdiest players. Tune in to see who gets the next boot on the next episode of Total.... Drama.... 101!!!  McLean up and outta here!" The camera fades to black.

Chapter Five: Take 'One Hundred and One'
The camera fades in to see Chris, in his usual position in front of the school, announcing the recap, "Last time on Total Drama 1-0-1: Schoolmates were sent to a maze fit for.... well... 3 year olds!  The subject for last week was Math, and, apparently, some of our schoolmates really need to go back to Junior High!  Anyway, before the challenge started, I told every, single schoolmate to remember the golden rule for that challenge:  STAY..... TOGETHER!  But did they listen?  No.  The Killer Pens separated themselves from each other, causing them to lose for the 3rd time in a row.  I don't even know why I bother with trying to help them now.  Most people hardly ever listen to the words of wisdom that comes from this sheer genius's mouth.  Anywho, last week's elimination ceremony wasn't really that much of a shocker.  The Pens banished Gretel because she got separated from their team and ultimately cost her team the win. Now, with only 16 school-mates left, who will win this week's challenge?!" "Could it be...," Chris went on as the camera panned to the Killer Pens looking very depressed over their losing streak, "the Pens!?" Ryan looked up, "Hey!" Nalyd looked up next, "What's that supposed to mean?" "We can still do this!!" Johnathan said, trying to cheer everyone up. The camera panned back to Chris, "Riiiiiiiight. Well, stay tuned for all the action. Right here, right now, on Total.... Drama.... 1-0-1!"

After the theme song, the camera faded in to the mansion that the schoolmates were staying in, only to see that it had been downgraded. It was still a huge mansion but there were only two stories now: the first floor, where the majority of the schoolmates stayed in and the second floor (Master Bedroom) with only one room in it, where Nalyd & Ryan stay. The camera was panning through, allowing the viewer to see the exquisite first floor. Seconds later, the silence was broken by an enormous scream. Everyone's door on the first floor opened, except for Tammi's. Right after, everyone crawled out of their rooms and went to Tammi's door entrance. Katherine opened Tammi's door to see Tammi, with the bottom of her shirt in her hands, on top of a chair, on one foot, screaming.

"MOUSE!!! Mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, MOUSE!!!" Tammi shrieked. "What's the problem?!" Katherine asked, stupidly.

Katherine: (stares into the confessional camera with a blank look on her face) Now, why did I ask that? (smacks forehead)

"Gee, I don't know, Katy. I'm just over here looking like an idiot screaming over a mouse!  Perhaps, there's a dinosaur loose in my room!" Tammi struck back. "Touch-y." Alyssa replied as she walked in. Tammi eyed Alyssa, and began thinking while she was in the chair. At that point, an evil grin came up upon her face. At that moment, Jeff took it upon himself to enter the room and grab the mouse. "Hey, there..... Little Dude," Jeff said, slowly, "heh, what's up?" "Ugh. Filthy vermin! Just get it out of here!" Tammi responded. Jeff scooped the rat up into his other hand and threw it over his shoulder. Ariel gasped at this, dove for the rat, and caught it before it hit the ground. "Is zis some sort of... how you say... 'custom' in your country? Just throwing rats over your shoulder?" Dedrek asked, to which he got no answer to. Ariel got up from the floor, and smiled, "Another friend saved!" Johnathan then patted Ariel on the back, but was interrupted by a loud noise.

"CUT!!" the noise said, coming from Tammi's closet. Chills ran down Tammi's body; this random shout caused her to leap up from the chair and cling to the ceiling. Chris came out, "Cut, cut, CUT!!" Ryan looked at Chris, then the closet, then Chris again, then the closet again, "Chris, did you just come out of the closet?" A background rimshot was heard and everyone began laughing. ".... No, but your uncle did." Chris wittingly snapped back, and a bigger rimshot was heard. Ryan growled at Chris, but said nothing. "ANYWAY...," Chris starts off, eyeing Jeff, "Dude! I had everything so perfect! You weren't supposed to pick the mouse up!  Now you've ruined all the drama, the suspense, the screaming!" Jeff put his hand on Chris's back, "Sorry, man, I didn't know." "Whatever, whatever. Since most of you can't understand the hints I'm dropping about today's challenge, let alone, do the challenge, I'm going to tell you right now that I'm prepping you up for today's next subject, Television Broadcasting"! Ryan began to stare into space, "Television!? Broadcasting!?  I could be a.... a.... starrrrrr!" Yellow star-shaped figures then appeared where Ryan's pupils were as he began to daydream. Lilie looked at him and fanned her hand in front of his eyes, but got no response from Ryan. "While Ryan fantasizes over the dreams he knows will never happen, I'll go ahead and tell you what's about to happen! First of all, for the idiots that don't know, and I know there are some out there, "television broadcasting" is basically a term used to describe anything that's live or pre-recorded on television.  Commercials, infomercials, news reports, cartoons, plays, Chris McLean-based shows, the works!  People go up in front of a giant camera and basically start talking about recent events or what they want you to buy or maybe try making you laugh by having the mouse hurt the cat using it's own mousetrap.  But, whatever it may be, they're all linked to the same thing: they're all on television." "Wicked." Webby said to Chris.

"Today, I will only need 5 of you, or 6 depending on one thing, to compete in this challenge. Both teams are going to be doing a news report!" Lilie gasped, "I've been on TV before. This should be a piece of cake."

Lilie: My family is nothing but businessmen and businesswomen, so you should know that I've been on television at least once. My team's going to owe me big for helping with this win.

"As I was saying, I'm going to need 5 or 6 people from each team," Chris continued. "I need one person to be the following people: a meteorologist (weatherman[woman]), a sportscaster, a "You Didn't Hear It from Me" gossip reporter, a cameraman(woman), and one OR two main news anchors. I'll give you a few minutes to write down who should be what.  Get going, and then meet me in Room 126, the Radio & TV Broadcasting Room!"

After about 10 minutes past, Chris received the lists from both teams and posted them on a giant flat-screen monitor in the room, "Here we are:"

"There is your competition, there's who you are going up against. Take it into consideration, and pummel them to pieces!  Thoughts?" Chris declared.

Ariel: I gotta say, I'm really jazzed to be the weatherman for out team. And look who I'm going up against.... Stefani! I'm sure she's still loopy from last week. This should be fun and easy. (smiles) Stefani: (looks around in confessional then looks up) Oooooooh! Twinkly light-bulb!! (she touches it, causing her finger to get burned) Owww!!! Bulby hot!! (frowns) Zach: I chose to be the Cameraman to make sure I don't get eliminated if our team loses. We've won three times in a row, I wonder if we can make it four. Dedrek: I didn't even sign up to be zis.... how you say.... 'cameraman'. Ryan forced me to! I don't know how to operate a camera, especially a camera zat zese silly Americans use! Tammi: I'm going to be the team's gossip reporter and, mannnnnnn, do I have some dirt on some people, already! (pulls out a sheet of paper) It's go time, baby! Terry: I chose gossip reporter for our team. I really don't know why, I'm not that funny, but no one else signed up for it, so I did! Maybe this will impress Ryan. (smiles) Katherine: I'm going to be co-news anchor with Lilie. Hmm... you know, I really don't like the prefix "co", it sounds a lot like (bleep). (gets close to the camera where the viewer can only see Katherine's face, gangster voice) And, don't you even think about callin' me a (bleep)! You gon' be pickin' up yo' glasses over there by the corner after I'm through wit'chu! And-- (confessional cuts off) Lilie: I think we have a great shot at winning this! I'm co-anchor with Katherine, and between the two of us, we could talk about stuff for days! Ryan: Nalyd said at the exact same time I did that he wanted to be the news anchor, so Samantha told us that we both had to be co-anchors. (groans) That spotlight is mine, and mine alone! Nalyd: In order to win this challenge, I'm gonna have to, (gags) get along with Ryan. Hopefully, we can pull this out. Jeff: (with hands up) Sports time, baby!! I'm going up against Johnathan in that department. I love the guy, but hey, compared to me, he couldn't dribble a basketball, let alone, talk about it! Johnathan: Nalyd signed me up for the sportscaster job because there weren't any other people left good to take the job. Nice logic, way to motivate the rest of the team.

"Okay," Chris said, "since the Screaming Pencils won the last challenge, they get to decide who goes first. So, Webby, which team is going first?" "The Pens, duh. No way are we going first," Webby spoke up to say. "Alright. I want you to do everything in the order that you see it in on the table, and then each gossip reporter turns the news report back over to the co-news anchors so they can close out the news report.  Got it?  Good.  After you record the reports, I will take each team's tape and review them in the back room.  The 6 people that show off the better performance based on the attire, skills, and other attributes that I'm looking for will win invincibility for their whole team.  Killer Pens, start whenever you're ready."

Samantha went up to Dedrek's camera with a movie clamp, "Killer Pens News Report: Take One," she said as she clamped it down. She then began to hum theme music, to which Chris wrote notes down about on his clipboard. "Good evening, and welcome to Channel 100 News! I'm Nalyd," Nalyd presented. Ryan pushed him out of the camera's view and smiled, "And I'm Ryan! Breaking News Tonight!  Our friendly cook, Chef Hatchet went to visit relatives down in Miami, Florida, but trouble brewed as Chef had learned that his closest uncle had suffered a major heart attacked and died minutes later in his own home.... Tragic." Nalyd slapped Ryan and pushed him out of the camera's view, "Ryan and I were first at the scene. Roll video!" Dedrek pressed a button, and his camera showed Ryan & Nalyd running up to a weeping Chef Hatchet. "Mr. Hatchet! Mr. Hatchet!" they both said. Nalyd got to him first, held a microphone in Chef's face, and asked, "Mr. Hatchet, can you give us the name of the victim?" Chef began, "Well, his name--" Ryan cut him off to ask him a question of his own, "And, could you please explain to our viewers how severe the heart attack was?" "Well, it--" Chef was cut off again. "Chef, could you also tell our viewers and Ryan that he needs to wait his turn," Nalyd interrupted. "Uhh, I--" Again, Chef was cut off. "And, Chef, could you please tell our viewers and Nalyd that Nalyd needs to go get a tan?" Ryan struck back. "Nalyd, Ry--" Chef started. "And, Chef, could you please tell our viewers and Ryan that Ryan needs to go get a life?!" Nalyd shouted. At that point, Ryan dove at Nalyd and they began fighting off-screen; only Chef was looking into the camera, as he began weeping over his loss again. Back at the studio, Nalyd & Ryan were watching their work, along with Chris, who was writing more notes down. Nalyd looked at Dedrek and whispered, "Cut it off! Cut it off!!" The screen automatically went blank, and Chris began looking at Nalyd & Ryan in the studio. "Uhh....," Ryan started, "Let's just go to our meteorologist, Stefani, for more the weather down there in Florida, Stefani?" Dedrek panned the camera over to Stefani, who was seen, drooling, with a pointer in her hand, babbling in foreign tongue. Dedrek panned the camera back to Nalyd & Ryan. "Ooooooookay," Nalyd said. "Let's just go to Johnathan with sports! Johnathan?" Dedrek panned over to Johnathan. "Hello, world!" Johnathan said. He put his hands together, "Okay, I'm going to do an overview over California! And, the most recent thing that's happened in California is a certain basketball team has won the National Championship for '10!  That's right!  It's the big-dog Lakers!!  After 7 games of horror, the Lakers pulled it out by winning 4 of them against the Boston Celtics' 3! Congrats to the Lakers, and congrats to California!!  And, now, we will have our "You Didn't Hear It from Me!" gossip boy let you in on some juicy secrets!  Terry?" After Dedrek aimed at Terry, he looked into the camera, "Hello, hello! So glad you could join us!!  I have but one secret I wanna let you in on," Terry motioned Dedrek to "come closer", causing Dedrek to zoom in on Terry. "Okay. You didn't hear it from me, but word is, somebody here is related to Donald Freakin' Trump!! They are LOADED!  Stinkin' rich, and trying to get richer through this game!  Talk about a selfish little brat, right?!  Oh, yes, yes, I know.  Anyway, I can't tell you much more information.  I could get in trouble for just telling you that!  I'll let you in on as much as possible next time I see ya!  Well, let's turn it back to Nalyd & Ryan to close us out.  Guys?" Dedrek went back over to Nalyd & Ryan. "Well, that about wraps up tonight's news cast," Ryan said. "Join us next time on Channel 100! Same news time, same news channel.  Goodnight," Nalyd said, smiling. Dedrek pressed the "record" button on the camera to stop the recording, as Chris began to clap. "Amazing job, Killer Pens!! Except for the little snafu you hit with Stefani, I'd say you guys would be pretty tough to beat!!" "YES!!" Nalyd & Ryan said together. "We rule!" Johnathan exclaimed. "Rule? We dominate!" Terry said after him. He then looked at Stefani, who was curled up in fetal position, sleeping.

Terry: I still want to know what her deal is.

"Okay, Screaming Pencils! Places in 10 seconds!" Chris yelled out. Everyone's eyes on the Screaming Pencils' team widened as they all scurried about. Katherine & Lilie got to their places, Zach got behind the camera, and Jeff & Tammi got in their respective places. Chris was counting down from 5. Ariel was trying to run to get to his weatherman position, but bumped into Carter along the way, which caused the weak Carter to go flying into Zach. Zach tumbled down and the camera flew out of his hands before he could put it on the tripod. The camera went up in the air, and came crashing down, shattering into millions of pieces with the recording tape inside. Zach, Ariel, and Carter gasp. Carter picked up a handful of the pieces of the broken camera trying to put it back together, but couldn't. He, then, looked down and saw a hidden Hall Pass, located inside the camera. He grabbed it, "Ha! Invincibility, you pests!!" Zach looked at him with disgust.

Tammi: No way did that just happen. Zach: What the crap?! That was not my fault!! Clumsy Carter. (groans)

"This is all your fault!" Carter said accusing Zach and Ariel. "What?!" they both said in unison. "Alrighty, break it up, you three!" Chris said to them. "Our budget can't really afford to replace the camera that you idiots just broke. I would let you use the Killer Pens' camera, but now you don't have a tape to record it with!" "We can still do it, and you can remember it from memory!" Webby said, pleading. "Naahhh. I need the recording, and since you don't have one, you guys are technically disqualified!  Nalyd, Ryan, Stefani, Johnathan, Terry, Dedrek, and the Killer Pens are victorious!  Pencils, I'll be seeing you at the Detention Hall Ceremony!!"

Before the Detention Hall Ceremony, Tammi grabbed Jeff & Katherine and took them into her room. She whispered something in their ears, to which they agreed with by shaking their heads. Katherine, then, went off to whisper the same thing to Ariel. He also agreed with what was going on and left to go to D-Hall.

Tammi: It's time to get rid of a "pest" of my own. (takes out her cell phone, but the confessional cuts off)

At the Detention Hall ceremony, the Screaming Pencils all locked in their votes quietly, half of them, already knowing who was going home. "Time's up!!" Chris said, "I'll tally the votes: Golden A+'s go to.... Webby, Ariel, Jeff, Carter, Katherine, Tammi, and Zach!" Chris threw Golden A+'s to each schoolmate. Alyssa looked up to see that she and Lilie had yet to receive awards. Alyssa looked at Lilie, put on a fake frown face, and waved good-bye to her, as Tammi had told Alyssa that the alliance was voting Lilie off. "Tonight's final Golden A+ goes to.............................. Lilie!!" Chris announced, as he tossed er the award. "Yes, baby, yes!" Lilie said. Alyssa stood up from her chair and scoffed, "Ugh!! What?! How did I get the boot!?" Alyssa looked over at Tammi, who was waving goodbye. At that moment, a flashback of Jeff, Katherine, and Tammi's conversation was seen.

(flashback begin) Tammi: Jeff, Katherine? Can I talk to you guys for a sec? Jeff & Katherine: (walk over to Tammi) Tammi: Listen up. That little rogue comment Alyssa made about me with the mouse incident this morning, plus the fact that she was completely invisible today since she didn't do anything can only mean one thing... Katherine: What? Tammi: She.... goes.... down. I need more people to vote with me.... just for tonight? Are you interested? Jeff & Katherine: (look at each other) (flashback end)

Alyssa is seen storming out of the school and walking the Walk of Shame. She was heard mumbling before she left, ".... Two-timing.......... Backstabbing......" "And 16 turns into 15 tonight, thanks to the terrible Tammi! Will Tammi get Jeff & Katherine in her alliance for good?  Will Tammi back stab another member?  Will Chef ever stop fake crying about his fake relative from Miami!?  Find out next time on Total.... Drama... 1-0-1................ CUT!!! PRINT!!! I'm goin' to lunch!" The camera fades to black.

Chapter Six: Come Sing With Us
"Last time, on Total Drama 1-0-1!" Chris announced. "Breaking news! Breaking News!  Schoolmates participated in a television broadcasting challenge!  While some, i.e. Ryan, thought they would be a big star, they're dreams were crushed when I told them all they were doing was a news report.  The Killer Pens did an exceptional job on their report.  It was awesome!  And, right when I thought that the Screaming Pencils would get a 4th win in a row, BOOM!  The Three Stooges, Zach, Ariel, and Carter ruined their chances, making the Pens win by default!  I, for one, thought Carter would be going home, as the accidentally technically was his fault, but he managed to find another of my hidden Hall Passes inside the Screaming Pencils' camera.  What shocked me most was the elimination, though.  The terrible Tammi went against a member of her own alliance, and voted Alyssa out for not participating at all in the challenge!!  If it wasn't obvious in the beginning episodes, I feel I must tell you that little Zach had a crush on our most recently eliminated school-mate. With Alyssa out of the game, will Zach be sad? Will Tammi feel bad? Will I look to-tally rad?....... What? I needed another 'rhyme-y' word. Let's see what's in store for the rest of our schoolmates, right here, on Total.... Drama.... 1-0-1!!"

After the theme song, the camera went into the mansion and zoomed in on Stefani's door. The camera cut to the next scene, inside Stefani's room. The camera zooms in on Stefani, sleeping in her bed. She opened her eyes to see a giant camera. She punched the lens of the camera and the camera hit the cameraman's head, "Get outta here!" she roared, trying to go back to sleep. The cameraman rushed out of Stefani's room, back into the foyer, but kept filming her through a cracked door. Stefani opened her eyes again to see that the man was still there, outside her door. She threw a pillow at him, "Get out!!" she screamed.

The cameraman ran out of the room, past Terry, who was outside of Stefani's door, as well, wondering what the screaming was about. "Hey, you okay?" he asked. "I'm fine... I'm just a little aggravated right now. Mainly over the reason why I can't remember the last couple of weeks," she looks at her hand, "or where this burn on my finger came from.  Do you know?" she looked at her doorway to see that Terry had disappeared.

Terry: (laughing very hard) She has no idea what she's been doing!! (laughs hard some more and falls out of the chair, tries to catch his breath) Whooooooooo!

The camera then pans through the foyer until it immediately stops due to a scream. "Alyssaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!" Zach screamed from his room, sobbing. "Where's the robber!? Who's Melissa!?" Katherine said, when she ran into Zach's room with a pan in her hands. She looked at Zach, nearly crying, "Ohhh, you're sad about.... Alyssa." As soon as Katherine said the name, Zach began to cry. "Don't say that name!" he told her, clearing his eyes. Katherine put her hand on Zach's back, "What name?..... Alyssa?" Zach blubbered some more.

Zach: (clearing his eyes) Alyssa!! If you're watching this on Satellite, babe, I wanted to say... I think I love you!! (almost starts to cry again) Grrr... Why did I have to give in to Tammi? (takes out a guitar) Alyssa, I even kinda wrote a song about you! (plays a note on guitar) Oh, 'Lyssaaaaaa. I'm really startin' (plays note) to miss yaaaaaa. Wish Tammi didn't make me (plays note) diss yaaaaaa. I really wish I could've.... (plays note) kissed yaaaaaaa. (guitar string breaks off the guitar, Zach begins crying again as the confessional cut off)

The scene then switched to Carter's room. Carter was awake, looking at the Hall Pass he earned last week. He read a small inscription on it, " '.... Only able to be used in the episode you receive it.' What?!  That's not fun!" Samantha popped out randomly from under Carter's bed, "What's not!?" she yelled, causing Carter to scream. "Nothing, nothing!" he said, "Just... Just get outta here! You're not supposed to be in my room!" Samantha shrugged and walked out normally and closed the door behind her. "Man, she's demented," Carter said to himself. Again, Samantha found a way to appear under Carter's bed, "Who is!?!?" she asked, again, causing Carter to scream. The camera then filmed the outside of Carter's room door, as he was heard screaming inside, "Outta here!!" Samantha ran out and into her own room.

At that point, Chris came on an intercom and sang his instructions to the contestants' in their rooms and in the foyer, "Alllll contestants, get to Room 220, nowwwwwww!" A faint breaking noise was heard in the background of the message, "Aw, crap!" After a few minutes, the scene cut to everyone, waiting on Chris to enter the room. Webby got bored and began to look around. Again, he saw Tammi with her cellphone out. Webby got Ariel & Zach's attention, "Hey... Check this out," Webby zoomed past Ariel and Zach and then ran to Tammi, going past her and swiping her cellphone again in the process. "UGH!!! Get back here, jerk!" Tammi said, chasing after him.

Tammi: I do not have to put up with this! I am a mature. Young. Lady. Apparently, he's not......... not the "mature" part. (winks)

Webby ran around the choir room, and was running near Lilie. Lilie decided to be a little cruel, and tripped Webby. Webby tumbled onto the ground, releasing Tammi's cellphone. However, he released it at a height, causing it to fly out of an open window. "Noooooooooooooooooooo!!!" Tammi said as she dove out of the window, head-first, trying to retrieve it. The entire group of schoolmates remained silent, until Jeff spoke out, "Did she just dive out that window... for a cellphone?" "Yep," Ariel said. "Mhm." Dedrek responded.

Tammi: (with a cast on her arm) This cellphone (holds it up with other hand) is worth a lot. (referring to Webby) It's probably worth more than that little child's life! I have everything on here. Events, birthdays, reminders........ secrets!! I don't play around when it comes to this thing.

Chris comes in the Choir room to break the silence in the room, humming the instrumental of Come Fly With Us, "Hello, my faithful schoolmates!!" "Faithful?! Have you seen some of these people?" Ryan scolded immediately. "Can you ever let me get a sentence out without you butting in somewhere? I will applaud for days for anyone that could make a real-live 'mouth-zipper' to shut your pie hole!" Chris threw back at him. "But-- I-- It-- H-- Ugh...," Ryan stammered. "Mhm. Anyway, today's school subject is Music!  I--" he was cut off by Tammi, who opened the room's door, with an arm cast on, and slammed it against the wall. "Tammi! So nice of you to join us!" Chris said as Tammi went back over to the Screaming Pencils. She eyed Webby and then began listening to Chris. "As I was saying, our challenge subject is Music. Now, I think you guys, at least should like this one.  I know one of the #1 things teens like in this crazy world is music, so enjoy it.  The task is simple.  At first, I was going to have 2 challenges, but we're a little pressed for time, so we're just going with the one.  I need you guys to choose a person from your team to sing and a song.  That's it.  Just pick someone, get a song, and I'll handle the rest from there!"

The teams split into two areas of the room. The camera zooms in on the Screaming Pencils. "I think I should sing!!" Zach shouted out, "And, I know the perfect song to sing, Simple & Clean by Hikaru!" Tammi looked at Zach crazy, "Simple & Clean by who??" "Hikaru Utada! This biz--" Zach was cut off. "Eh, eh... I don't need details. No thanks, Zach.  We need an English song!" Tammi squealed.

Zach: The song can be in English. (sighs) Man.

"Anyone else got a suggestion?" Tammi asked. "I'm a pretty good singer, dude!" Jeff said with confidence. "Hmm.... What song are you thinking about singing?" Tammi said out loud. Jeff thought long and hard. Tammi looked at him, "Anyth--". "I'm thinking, I'm thinking!" Jeff said, "Oh! Airplanes by B.o.B, featuring my girl, Katherine, as Hayley!" Katherine began to blush, "Sounds like a party!" she said, "Tammi? You into it?" "That song?!" Tammi exclaimed, "I'm not really feeling it. We might as well have Katherine sing TiK ToK by Ke$ha!" A few of the Screaming Pencils looked at Katherine. "Hey... YEAH!" all of the Screaming Pencils but Tammi exclaimed. "...... What?" Tammi said. "No. NO!  I was joking!" All of the Screaming Pencils were nodding their heads to each other. "Looks like it's decided," Ariel said, as Katherine shook her head again. Tammi looked at them all in disgust. "Ugh, fine," she finally said. "It's better that a female sings, anyway. But, you better win!" All of the Screaming Pencils put one of their hands on top of Katherine's in the air, "Break!" they said as if they were a football team, and clapped.

Over at the Killer Pens' group, Ryan was flailing one of his hands everywhere, as the camera zoomed in. The scene cut to Ryan, "Oh! Oh! Oh! I can do this!!" "Ryan, what are you even thinking about singing?" Dedrek asked. "..... I'm Too Sexy by Right Said Fred," Ryan said and winked. "But, then you'd be lying," Nalyd told him, bringing Ryan back to reality. Ryan mocked him, "Mu, men-me-me-me-me-me!" Ryan scoffed and marched off, leaving the other Killer Pens to choose for themselves.

Ryan: (angry, referring to Nalyd) UGH!! Well, if I would be lying for singing that song, he would be committing a felony for singing it!! (scoffs) It's not like you look any better, Nixon!! Nalyd: He's conceited enough. That song will murder his ego.

Terry then raised his hand. "Terry?" Nalyd said. "I have a suggestion. I'm a decent singer and Don't Stop Believin' by Journey is a decent song.  I could sing that?" Terry asked. "It's good. But, dude, face it.  You're really nervous at times." Nalyd told him, "'Nervousness' and 'Stage Fright' are really linked together, man."

Nalyd: No way we're going to have that little nerd sing for our whole team.

Terry nodded, "Hmm.... Fine. But, just lettin' you know.  I'm never gonna give up for this." "That's it!!" Nalyd yelped. "You'll let me do it?!" Terry asked, smiling. "NO!!" Nalyd responded, smiling. Dedrek and Samantha began laughing. "Never Gonna Give You Up by Rick Astley! It's funny and catchy, it's perfect!!" Nalyd continued. The Killer Pens stared at Nalyd in silence as a cricket began chirping. "Well, do you trogs have a better idea?!" Nalyd demanded. The camera went back to the Killer Pens who were still silent, as the cricket had even stopped chirping. "I didn't think so! We're doing that."

Both teams went back over to Chris, who was waiting. "Alright, Screaming Pencils! Who's singing for you guys?" Katherine stepped up, "Meeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!" she yelped.

Nalyd: So, my competition is one of the crazy girls!? This should be a cinch.

"Song, Katherine?" Chris asked. "TiK ToK by my best friend!" Katherine said out, smiling. "Who's 'My Best Friend'? I thought Ke$ha sang that song," Chris said, confused. Katherine laughed, "I was talking about her silly-willy!" "Alright! And, Killer Pens.  What about you guys?" Chris asked. The camera went over to the Killer Pens (Ryan included, as he came back), and Nalyd stepped out. Chris looked at the Killer Pens, "Who's singing, guys!?" Nalyd stepped out more, "Me, you twit!" "Oh! Nalyd. I didn't see you there," he said, laughing, "What are you singing?" "Never Gonna Give You Up by Rick Astley," Nalyd smirked. "........ Seriously?" Chris said. "Well. I think we already have a winner.  But our producers say that we have to have a challenge per day."

Chris: Actually, they don't say that. (Chris looks left, then right) It's just better for my paycheck! (laughs)

"Okay. It's Katherine vs. Nalyd, Ke$ha vs. Rick, Hot vs. Not!!  Katherine, you're going first!  The singer who illustrates the best song performance based on singing ability, performance, and all around entertainment will win invincibility for their team!!  Losers send someone home.  Anytime you're ready, Katherine." Chris announced. Katherine went up to the Choir's stage, went behind the curtains, quickly got changed in an outfit, and cued an intern to start the music. The curtain went up, and Katherine came out with a Ke$ha-like costume on, makeup everywhere on her face, and a smile, and began to sing.

(Screaming Pencils' song start) Katherine: (sings nearly perfect) Wake up in the morning, feeling like P. Diddy. [Ay, what up girl?] Put my glasses on, (puts glasses on) I'm out the door. (runs around on stage) I'm gonna hit this city! [Lets go] Before I leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack. (fakes brushing teeth) Cause when I leave for the night, I ain't comin' back! (blows a kiss at Jeff) I'm talking: pedicure on our toes, [toes] (kicks one foot up) Trying on all our clothes, [clothes] (grabs shirt) Boys blowing up our phones, [phones] (takes out a cellphone and reveal that it's Tammi's, Tammi gasps) Drop-topping, playing our favorite CDs, (acts like she's listening to music) Pulling up to the parties. (fake drives up to a house) Trying to get a little bit tipsy.

(dances around everywhere) Don't stop, make it pop! DJ, blow my speakers up! To-night, I'mma fight, 'Til we see the sunlight! TiK ToK, on the clock, But the party don't stop! Woah-oh oh ohhh! Woah-oh oh ohhh!

Ain't got a care in world, but got plenty of beer! (holds up a bottle of Sprite) Ain't got no money in my pocket, but I'm already here! Now, the dudes are lining up, 'cause they hear we got swagger But we kick 'em to the curb unless they look like Mick Jagger (camera shows a picture of Mick Jagger) I'm talking about: everybody getting crunk! [crunk] (stomps foot down when saying "crunk") Boys trying to touch my junk! [junk] (Jeff's eyes widen) Gonna smack him if he getting too drunk! [drunk] Now, now: we goin' 'til they kick us out. [out] Or the police shut us down. [down] Police shut us down [down] Po-po shut us -

(dances around everywhere for the chorus) Don't stop, make it pop! DJ, blow my speakers up! To-night, I'mma fight, 'Til we see the sunlight! TiK ToK, on the clock, But the party don't stop! Woah-oh oh ohhh! Woah-oh oh ohhh!

Don't stop, make it pop! DJ, blow my speakers up! To-night, I'mma fight, 'Til we see the sunlight! TiK ToK, on the clock, But the party don't stop! Woah-oh oh ohhh! Woah-oh oh ohhh!

DJ, you build me up. (points up) You break me down! (falls down) My heart, it pounds. (punches chest) Yeah, you got me.

With my hands up, (throws up hands) You got me now. You got that sound, Yea, you got me.

DJ, you build me up. (points up) You break me down! (falls down) My heart, it pounds. (punches chest again) Yeah, you got me.

With my hands up. Put your hands up! Put your hands up! Now, the party dont start 'til I walk in... (walks in an area of the stage by opening an imaginary door)

(dances around everywhere for the chorus) Don't stop, make it pop! DJ, blow my speakers up! To-night, I'mma fight, 'Til we see the sunlight! TiK ToK, on the clock, But the party don't stop! Woah-oh oh ohhh! Woah-oh oh ohhh!

Don't stop, make it pop! DJ, blow my speakers up! To-night, I'mma fight, 'Til we see the sunlight! TiK ToK, on the clock, But the party don't stop! Woah-oh oh ohhh! Woah-oh oh ohhh! (bows) (Screaming Pencils' song end)

The Screaming Pencils stare at Katherine, who's still on the stage, for about 4 seconds, then starting roaring with applause. Chris, along with them, said, "Oh, my boxers!! Katherine, that was amazing!!" "Well, what do you expect from the sister of Ke$ha!?" Katherine announced. "WHAT!?" everyone, including Chris, yelled. "What, what?" Katherine said. "Ke$ha's your sister??" Webby asked. "Uhh.... Yeah? Isn't everyone here related to a famous person?" Katherine asked. Lilie ducked her head down where no one could see her. "NO!!" Webby said, "Well, except for this other person, who's related to Donald Trump..... according to Terry." Chris holds up his hand, and taped onto it was the coveted Hall Pass. "High Five, everyone!!" he said, out of nowhere. Everyone turned around to Chris and saw the Hall Pass on his hand, and they all stampeded towards Chris. Chris's eyes grew wide as the schoolmates closed in on him; they all crash into each other. When everyone got up, Samantha was on the bottom of everyone, now with the Hall Pass in her hands. "Great work, Sam! Looks like it's yours now!" Chris beamed. "¡Olé!" Samantha said in a Spanish accent before getting up. Chris sighed, "Now, that the fun's over, we gotta get to Nalyd's Performance. What did you say you were singing, again?  The Barney Song?" Nalyd sighed, "No! Never Gonna Give You Up by Mr. Astley!" "Same difference," Chris said, "they both stink. But, whatever, whenever you're ready, man."

Stefani: (punches wall in confessional) What the heck did I do those last couple weeks!? Ugh... I'm so annoyed, I can hardly focus on this challenge! God, I'm aggravated.

(Killer Pens' song start) Nalyd: (sings shakily throughout the whole song) We're no strangers to love... (makes a heart with hands) You know the rules, and so do I! [do I, do I] A full commitment's what I'm thinking of. You wouldn't get this from any other guy. (shakes finger in camera) I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling, Gotta make you understand!

(dances around similar to Rick Astley) Never gonna give you up, Never gonna let you down, Never gonna run around and desert you, Never gonna make you cry, Never gonna say goodbye, Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you!

We've known each other for so long, Your heart's been aching, but you're too shy to say it! (does the "Shh!" motion) Inside we both know what's been going on, We know the game and we're gonna play it! (acts like he is shooting dice in a casino) And if you ask me how I'm feeling, Don't tell me you're too blind to see!

(dances around similar to Rick Astley for chorus) Never gonna give you up, Never gonna let you down, Never gonna run around and desert you, Never gonna make you cry, Never gonna say goodbye, Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you!

Never gonna give you up, Never gonna let you down, Never gonna run around and desert you, Never gonna make you cry, Never gonna say goodbye, Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you!

[Ooh, give you up!] [Ooh, give you up!] [Ooh,] never gonna give, never gonna give! [give you up] [Ooh,] never gonna give, never gonna give! [give you up]

We've known each other for so long, Your heart's been aching, but you're too shy to say it! (does the "Shh!" motion) Inside we both know what's been going on, We know the game and we're gonna play it! (acts like he is shooting dice in a casino again)

I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling, Gotta make you understand!

(dances around similar to Rick Astley for chorus) Never gonna give you up, Never gonna let you down, Never gonna run around and desert you, Never gonna make you cry, Never gonna say goodbye, Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you!

Never gonna give you up, Never gonna let you down, Never gonna run around and desert you, Never gonna make you cry, Never gonna say goodbye, Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you!

Never gonna give you up, Never gonna let you down, Never gonna run around and desert you, Never gonna make you cry, Never gonna say goodbye, Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.......... (bows) (Killer Pens' song end)

Both teams stare at Nalyd in awe, and don't clap this time. "Where's my applause?" Nalyd asked, with his hands up, still posing for his big finish. A cricket began to chirp again. The camera panned over to Chris, who was asleep in a chair. An intern threw a rock at him and whispered, "Wake up." "Huh? Huh? Wha-- Oh.  Okay, Nalyd, let's hear it!!" Chris said, thinking Nalyd hadn't sang at all. ".... I just did," Nalyd informed him. "Really? But, I was sleeping the whole time, an-- You put me to sleep!?" Chris asked abruptly. "... Uhhhhh... No?" Nalyd said. "Well, I believe we have an obvious winner. Katherine and the Screaming Pens are the victors!!  Killer Pens, once again, I'll be seeing you at the Detention Hall Ceremony." Nalyd stepped down from the stage, sighed, and walked past his team. "Bet'cha wish we would have went with my idea now, huh?" Ryan told him as he walked.

Everyone went back to the mansion. All of the Screaming Pencils piled into Katherine's room to party for her winning invincibility. Elsewhere, Ryan was walking around and spotted Terry and Samantha in Dedrek's room. "Hey, can I talk to you three about something?" Ryan said, smiling, and closing the door behind him where the viewer couldn't see anything.

The camera switched scenes to the Killer Pens sitting in Detention for the Detention Hall Ceremony. It went down the rows to listen to everyone's thoughts while voting. "This'll teach you," Ryan said, locking in his vote. "Ryan better do the right thing and vote off Johnathan," Nalyd said, locking a vote in. "I'm safe anyway, so I don't care what happens," Samantha brought up, choosing someone. "Bye-bye to you," Dedrek announced, locking his in. "Doesn't really matter to me," Stefani said, locking in a random vote. "It's time to end this," Terry confidently said, locking in a vote. "Ryan contacted me right before this ceremony. Maybe this is for the better," Johnathan said, choosing a person. "The votes are in!" Chris said, holding up a small card, "Terry, Dedrek, Samantha, Stefani, and Ryan! You guys are safe!" Chris throws the Golden A+'s to the schoolmates, respectively. Nalyd looked over to see Johnathan, whimpering over not receiving an A yet.

Nalyd: Ugh... Show some backbone, Johnathan, and just take your elimination like a man!

"Tonight's final Golden A," Chris said, "goes to....................................... JOHNATHAN!! Nalyd, it's time for you to go." Chris threw the Golden A+ at Johnathan. Nalyd opened his eyes to see that Johnathan got the last award, "What!? You voted me off!?  Me!?!  Why??" Nalyd looked directly at Ryan, who was smiling evilly, "It's time for you to go, man," he said, cackling a bit. Nalyd stood up, and nearly dove at Ryan, but stopped himself. He walked out of the Detention Hall room, shaking his fist along the way, saying, "I'll get you!!" threw his teeth to Ryan. Nalyd walks the Walk of Shame, and exits the school with Chris, but, before Chris could say the closing lines, Nalyd began to sprint behind the school to get into the mansion to see the Screaming Pencils. Chris and the remaining Killer Pens followed him. Nalyd busted through into the mansion and made his way into Tammi's room and screamed, "Tammi!!!" Tammi gasped, "What!? What are you doing here?!" An intern suddenly appeared behind Nalyd. Nalyd continued talking, "I love yo--!!!!" Nalyd was cut off as the intern slammed the door, grabbed Nalyd and whisked him away from the mansion, dragged out past his former teammates. The camera, then, went to Chris, who was puking with Ryan over what Nalyd has almost just said. Chris, catching his breath, "OH!!..... OH!!..... Really wasn't expecting that!!!! But, hey, that's TV for ya.  Ryan has seemingly backstabbed one of his alliance members, as well.  It's looking like a Tammi vs. Ryan game!  Find out who goes home, next episode of Total... Drama... 1-0-1!!" Chris pukes again, as the camera fades.

Chapter Seven: A Classic Spain-venger Hunt
The scene fades in to Chris singing the first recap sentence, "Last time on Total Drama One-Oh-Oneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Chris shows a clip of Zach in the confessional, "We learned that we have a few crybabies," He shows a clip of Carter and Samantha, "a few crazies," He then shows the final clip of Nalyd & Tammi, "and a few secret lovers. Schoolmates had to put their lungs to the ultimate singing test challenge!!  Katherine watched the clock TiK ToK, while Nalyd was Never Gonna Give You Up!  And, speaking of never giving up, that's exactly what Nalyd did when he forced his team to have him sing for them to get invincibility.  Sadly for the Pens, they lost again, and, of course, Ryan found a way to backstab Nalyd by getting his alliance members plus Dedrek and Johnathan to vote him off." The camera zooms out to show Chris on a plane, rather than in front of the school, "With only 14 people left, let's see how these losers fare with this week of Total.... Drama.... 1-0-1!!"

After the theme song, the scene fades in to see Ariel asleep in a random bed. He then wakes up, scratches his head, and, eyes half-open, proceeded to a mysterious door. He opened the door and nearly walked off. Looking down, he noticed that he was 1,500 feet above the ground. His eyes widened, as he screamed and slammed the door, waking the others. "We're all going to Heaven!!" Ariel screamed, nearly crying. "What!?" Tammi said, now not wearing the arm cast from last week. Tammi walked over to where Ariel was, opened the door, looked out, and closed it. "We-- We-- We're on a plane!!" Tammi shrieked. The camera then zoomed out to see the overview of the plane that the schoolmates were in. "When did this happen?" Webby asked. "Probably when we were sleeping. I don't remember a thing." Lilie said, confused.

Chris then came into where the schoolmates where, "Don't ya love this game!?" Everyone stares at Chris with distaste. "Oooookay, then," he said. "Hopefully, you remember the Total Drama Jumbo Jet! And, if you don't, you will remember it after a while, because you're on it right now!!  Everything's the same on the Jumbo Jet as last season on World Tour.  But, we'll only be using this place if the challenge isn't back home in Canada." Katherine gasped, "Where we goin'?!" Chris pulled down a map out of nowhere and pointed to a location on it, "Here. Pamplona, Spain!!  Your next challenge subject is Spanish!"

Terry: Chris told us that we were going to Spain for a Spanish challenge. It seems fun, and I have a 95 in Spanish III! This should be simple.

"This is amazing! I love the Latinos!" Terry said. "I hope you do, because you're going to be seeing a lot of them when we land!" Chris informed him. "Wicked!" Jeff said. "Okay, before we start with everything, I need to share a few things with you. First, a good news-bad news scenario," Chris said. "Bad news, we had a elimination ceremony and sweet Nalyd was eliminated. Good news?  Tammi's got a love interest!" Chris winked at Tammi, who rolled her eyes.

Tammi: I can not believe Nalyd admitted that he loved me last week! It was surprising. Very shocking. Uhhh... I can almost say that I.... (a TD101 producer laughs off-screen)  Hey?! What's so funny!? I wasn't going to say anything about how I miss my Nally! (covers mouth) I mean "Noodlehead"! (covers mouth again) No! I mean-- (confessional cuts off)

"Now... Your challenge? It's a scavenger hunt race around Pamplona!" Chris said as he handed Tammi and Ryan a list of items:

Chris continued, "On that list, you will see 4 items. You both have the same thing.  The objective is to find those 4 items and report back to me, at the Jumbo Jet's location, as soon as possible.  If you do, you win, if you don't.... you lose, duh.  These items can be found anywhere around Pamplona.  Everyone ready!?" Everyone shook their heads. Chris pulled out an air horn, "Ready in 3...... 2....... 1..... HUNT!"

The schoolmates ran out of the plane only to be surprised by many streamers, balloons, noisemakers, and screaming from pedestrians outside. All of the schoolmates look around to see many people holding up signs and cheering over many thing. Tammi tried to talk over them, "Okay!! Guys!! We need to get started!" The Screaming Pencils then bolted out of the plane and cut through the people all over the area. Terry looked to his right and pointed, "Over there!!" He pointed to a bullring with a "The Running of the Bulls" sign in Spanish on it. Terry bulleted out of plane, cut past the people and ran in that direction, leaving his team in the dust. "Hey!!" Ryan exclaimed. "Get back here!!" Ryan and the other Killer Pens tried to catch up to Terry.

Back at the Screaming Pencils, Jeff had found a mysterious building, "Hey, what about this place?" The Screaming Pencils shrugged and stepped in to see it was some sort of restaurant. Katherine takes the list, "Oooh! It's a restaurant!! Maybe we should see if they serve-- uhh... uhhhh..." Webby takes the list from her and pronounces the word fluently, "Paella." "Oh," Katherine said, as her head went down, causing Jeff to go over and pat her on the back. Webby dashed to the front of the restaurant and asked the cashier in Spanish, again, fluently, "¿Disculpe, señor? Me preguntaba si te sirvió el plato llamado "paella" aquí. ¿Y usted? (Excuse me, sir? I was wondering if you served the dish named "paella" here.  Do you?)" "Oh, sí, por supuesto que sí. Te diré qué. Puesto que usted pidió tan bien, voy a dejar usted tiene este plato de forma gratuita. (Oh, yes, of course we do. I'll tell you what.  Since you asked so nicely, I'll let you have this dish for free.)," the cashier said back to Webby. He gave Webby a plate of food. "Gracias, señor. (Thank you, sir.)," Webby said. He turned around and headed for the door, where the rest of his team was, "Let's go." Webby turned around to see his team still frozen in the same spot, all with their mouths wide open over what just happened.

Webby: What?! I may be a goofball, but I can speak some good Spanish! I have a 98 in the Spanish IV class that I'm in right now.

Back at the Killer Pens', everyone was huddled together inside the "The Running of the Bulls" arena. "Okay, here's my plan." Samantha started. "I see a load of Red Bandanas and Bulls out there in that field. These guys don't know who we are, so I say we just run out there and just swipe the things we need." "Hmm," Ryan said. "Crazy... but it just might work! We all ready!?" Everyone put their hands on top of Ryan's and shouted, "PENS!" as they clapped afterwards. "As soon as they shoot that bullet into the sky, we run out there with the bullrunners, got it?" Samantha said. Stefani looked at her, "Whatever." "Is there a problem, Stefani?" Samantha asked. "Whatever." Stefani responded. "Okay, then?" Terry said. "Whatever." Stefani rudely said, again. At that point, the gun sounded. The Killer Pens hopped the fence and ran out into the field. Dedrek ran up to one of the bullrunners/bullfighters and snatched the Red Bandanna off of his neck, nearly choking. "It's in zee bag!!" Dedrek exclaimed, running away. Ryan searched the field, only to find one bull coming right at him. He passed an evil look at the bull. "Haha, toe-ro, toe-ro!!" Ryan said, murdering the Spanish language. The bull swooped right past him; he clinged his hand onto the bull's horn and literally broke it off. He looked at what was in his hand and gasped.

Ryan: (admiring his biceps) Wow. I must be really stronger than I look! (kisses bicep)

The Killer Pens run out of the bull ring, not caring how they had completely aborted it. Samantha crossed off the two things they had earned and headed for City Hall, which was also where the Screaming Pens were heading. At City Hall, both teams crashed into each other. Immediately, Ryan & Tammi got up in each other's faces. "You watch where you're go--," they both said to each other but stopped when realizing who they were talking to. "What are you doing here?" Ryan questioned. Ariel took the scavenger hunt list, "Well, if you must know, we're here looking for the chiih-chiih.... chuh-ch-chuh...." Webby snatched the list again, "We're looking for the chupinazo." "Interesting, that's what we're gunning for!" Dedrek said.

Carter: (smacks his head, sarcastic voice) Noooo, really!? We're both at City Hall and that's the only thing on the list that we have to get that's near the City Hall. I would never have guessed that you're going to try to get the same thing!

At that point, a stranger threw down two chupinazos, both on a crash-course with Stefani's head. Samantha looked up, "Stefani, look out!!" Everyone but Stefani dove for cover. "Whatever," Stefani said, again.

Stefani: (sighs) ................ Whatever.

The two rockets then clanked Stefani on the head. "Ow!!" She squealed. Ryan sighed and went over to her, looked to see that bumps were now on her head, and put his hands on his hips. Ryan sighed, "Are you okay?" "I guess so," Stefani finally said something different. She picks up the rockets, "except these stupid planes hit me on my pretty head!!" "Those are rockets, Stefani," Webby muttered, taking one for the Screaming Pencils. Dedrek scooped one up for the Killer Pens. Ryan, then, crept up behind Webby and screamed, causing Webby to scream and throw his paella in the air. Ryan and Dedrek, hand-in-hand, both jumped up and caught it. Ryan laughed evilly, "Team, let's get to Chris!!!" he yelled. Everyone but Stefani on the Killer Pens began running towards Chris's direction. Johnathan stopped, "Stefani, let's go." Stefani looked at him, drooling, "Pretty boyyyyyy." "Oh, no, not this again," Johnathan said. He picked Stefani up and began running with the team towards Chris.

Webby: No, no, no, no, NO!! Ryan, you suck!! (pouts)

The Screaming Pencils began chasing after the Killer Pens, but it was too late. Dedrek handed Chris the Red Bandanna and the Chupinazo and Ryan handed Chris the Paella and the Bull's Horn. Chris then blew the air-horn. "We have our winners!!! Dedrek, Ryan, and the Killer Pens win the Spain-venger Hunt!!" Chris announced. Dedrek and Ryan, surprisingly, high-fived each other, as the Screaming Pencils came up behind them. "What?! No fair!!  I call cheating!" Ariel screamed. "They took our pa-- pee-- pah-pah--" "Paella!!" Webby yelled. "Did I say anything about stealing another teams' item? Huh?  Did I?" Chris asked slyly to Ariel & Webby. "No," Webby said, "but--" "But nothing! The Killer Pens win this game!" Chris said. "Time for you losers to go vote someone off!!" Ryan yelled out, smiling. "What?" Chris butted in. "Oh, did I not tell you guys? There's no elimination ceremony this week!!" Ryan's eyes grew big, then turned red.

Ryan: (long list of expletives)

"Come on, Chris... That's no fair," Samantha said to Chris. "Yeah, Chip. Totally un-flair!!" Stefani said, incorrectly. Chris stared at Stefani, "What happened to her?" "Long story," Johnathan said, lying. "Okay then!" Chris said. "Killer Pens! For winning this challenge, you get to stay here, in Pamplona, Spain, for the rest of the week!" "What?!" Ryan yelled out. "I don't want to stay in this craphole!!" "Well, ain't that too bad!?" Chris responded. "You're staying, and the Screaming Pencils are coming back with me for a little torture!" The Screaming Pencils stared at Chris, scared; the comment caused Carter to faint. Chris gets in front of the camera, "The Pens pull out another desperately-needed victory! Let's see how these guys manage on the next episode of Total... Drama....... Ciento Uno (101)!!!" The camera fades to black, abruptly.

Chapter Eight: Potato Prosecution
The scene fades in, as usual, to Chris standing outside of Gilded Glory, "Last time on-- You know what? I don't really even feel like doing a recap.  When you think of it, nothing happened.  Except for the Killer Pens finally winning again, but that's hardly worth mentioning." Chris winked, "Roll the theme song!!"

After the theme song finished, all schoolmates (including the Killer Pens, who have returned from Spain) are in the mansion. The camera went into Johnathan's room, who was playing video games. "Come on, come on!! No!!  Jump over the Koopa!!" Johnathan said, repeatedly tapping a button on the controller. Johnathan then loses the game. This upsets him, as he threw the controller at the television screen, shattering it. His eyes widened, "It wasn't me!!" he yelled. At that point, Ryan barged into his room half naked, with a towel on, shampoo still in his hair, and wearing a facial mask. "Keep it down in here!!!" Ryan said. Johnathan looked over to see who it was, thought it was a monster, and shrieked. Johnathan threw multiple pillows at Ryan, "Get out!! Get out, you evil spirit!!" "Ugh!! It's me, Ryan!" Ryan exclaimed. "I KNOW!! Get out, you!!" Johnathan said, throwing an alarm clock at him. Ryan marched out of Johnathan's room, muttering.

Johnathan: (breathing hard) No, I don't know what came over me!! (shakes) I'm nice! I'm nice!!! (slaps self) I'm a helpful angel!! (pause) Oh, what is this game doing to me?!? (sobs) Ryan: I woke up a little angrier than usual. Mainly because of last week's stupid reward challenge! Ugh!! One of the Pencils' should have gone home that week!

Over in Terry's room, he was looking at a picture, but the viewer is unable to see who the picture is of. Terry noticed the camera snooping in his room. "Come on, guy, I'm trying to have some private time. Get outta here," Terry said, smiling.

Terry: (clutching the picture) .......... She's so amazing.

Tammi was locked away in her room, also looking at a picture; however, the camera did not go into her room.

Tammi: (clutching a different photo of someone else) He's so.... (sighs romantically)

Elsewhere, in Katherine's room, she and Jeff were feeding each other Twizzlers. Jeff slid the candy in Katherine's mouth; however, Katherine jammed it in Jeff's, thinking it was romantic.

Jeff: She's the most beautiful person I have ever met... (pause) but, I swear, when it comes to romance, dude, she's dumber than a truck tire. (longer pause, sharp inhale) Ssssss... Don't tell her I said that, okay?

Jeff and Katherine begin making out as the camera leaves Katherine's room and switches scenes to the school's cafeteria. Webby walked into the cafeteria and eyed a table. He ran up to it and began dancing and singing. "Oh, Danny, boyyyyyy," he began, while dancing, "the pipes the pipes are callinggggggg." An off-screen plastic bottle was thrown off-screen and hit Webby in the head, causing him to fall on the table. At that point, a random school bell rang. "Turn that turd off!" Ryan said, talking about the school bell as he walked in the school cafeteria. Chris entered behind Ryan, "Geez, you're in a good mood." "I'm p.o'd right now because of last week." Ryan said. He then talked to himself, "Let's just forget all about it, Ryan. Don't even think of the word--" "Reward?" Dedrek said, accidentally. Ryan screamed on the inside.

"Err... Okay, then. Everyone, gather around.  Now, I'm pretty sure that you just heard that bell.  For those of you that don't know what it was for, it was the bell signaling Lunch Time!!" Chris beamed. Everyone began to groan, as Chris went over to two giant covered vats. "Ugh... Chris," Carter started, "nobody wants to eat any of Chef's food. It's... It's..."

Lilie: .... As gross as his face. (snickers)

".... Horrible!!" Ariel finished. "Oh, this food won't be for eating, Ariel," Chris began. He uncovered the two vats to reveal one green and one red, both filled with truckloads of mashed potatoes. "It's for throwing!!!" Jeff gasped, "Sweet!! We're having a food-fight?!" "Jeff, I'm beginning to think your IQ has gone up since you've been here. YES!  We're having an old-fashioned, mashed potato food fight!" Chris screamed. Stefani stared at the two vats, "Soo.... We're fighting... with food?" "Yes, little Miss Dimwit," Chris responded. "I don't know how to make this any clearer. I pulled some strings to make Lunch our subject this week, and we're having a food fight for the challenge.  The last contestant without food on any part of them will win invincibility for their team.  The losers will send someone home." "Wait!! Food?!  All over ourselves!?" Ryan yelled. "NO!! I won't do it!! I just got my hair did from last week!!" "Shut UP! Cool DOWN!" Chris said, trying to sound smart. "Anyway... Ryan, you may be in luck. Since one team is currently dominating and has a huge team members numbers advantage, I'll only allow three people to participate in the food fight!" "... I'm starting to like this, now," Ryan responded. "Notice how I said 'may', Ryan," Chris threw back. "Instead of you guys choosing the three, which is boring, 3 people will be randomly selected by me drawing your names out of these two caps!" Chris revealed that he had two caps, one green and one red, with slips of paper inside them.

Lilie: I'm too good to get mashed potatoe'd!! (sobs) Carter: A food fight... How original. Ariel: Didn't they do something like this a couple seasons ago? (pause) Oh, no.. wait. That was an eat-off! Riiiiiiight. Webby: I wouldn't mind being chosen. I almost won the Spanish challenge for us. This is nothing but easier! Zach: (sneezes) Let's do this, team!! Katherine: (imitating a siren noise the entire time she's in the confessional) Jeff: (dancing) Food fight! Food fight! Food fight! Food fight! Food fight! (laughs) I'm stoked for this one, yo! Tammi: Cleanliness is next to decency, according to Tammi. I don't like getting dirty! I am not doing this challenge!

Chris grabbed the Screaming Pencils' green cap and picked out 3 pieces of paper. "For the Screaming Pencils," he annouced, "we have..... Zach!......... Jeff! and............... Lilie!!" Zach high-fived Jeff, "Sweet!!" They, then, both look at Lilie, who looked as if she saw a ghost. Zach went over to Lilie. "Are you okay, man?" he asked. Lilie snapped out of her trance, and looked at Zach. "Uh... Yeah.. Yeah... I'm fine," she said, stammering.

Lilie: (shivering) Mashed.... potatoes..... everywhere!!! (eyes widen)

Chris whipped out a cellphone, "Hi, yeah. Get a medic out here just in case we have a few.... trauma attacks.  Thanks." He put the cellphone up and continued, "And, for the Killer Pens........."

Stefani: (pause) I still don't get it. Ryan: (protecting his hair) No, no, no, no, no, no, n-- (confessional cutoff) Samantha: Bring it on, ya knobs! Terry: (crosses fingers) Pick me, pick me, pick me, pick me, pick me, pi-- (confessional cutoff) Dedrek: Zis is getting annoying. I am... how you say.... 'tired of zis '. Johnathan: (rocking in the chair) Nice boyyyy.... Nice boyyyy....

Chris looked at the 3 Killer Pen names, "We have....... Terry!........ Dedrek! and........ Samantha!!" Ryan let out a sigh of relief and stopped clutching his hair, "YES!!" Chris looked at the remaining contestants, "Katherine, Carter, Tammi, Webby, Ariel, Ryan, Johnathan, and Stefani, you may all join me here behind this glass, see-through shield to watch the battle without getting splattered, if you'd like."

The scene cut to giant heaps of mashed potatoes in front of Ariel, Jeff, and Zach, as well as, in front of Dedrek, Terry, and Samantha. Chris looked at both teams. "The only thing you have to do is eliminate your rivals on the opposite side by throwing mashed potatoes at them. If you get hit by the mashed potatoes, you're out.  It's simple, right?!  Ariel, Jeff, and Zach vs. Dedrek, Samantha, and Terry!  Last person standing on one team, along with the other two that helped them will all win invincibility for their team!  This is an important one.  Are we ready!?  Get set.......... GO!!!" Chris blew the airhorn and ducked behind the glass, the other team members began cheering.

The Screaming Pens took a "Crush the New Guy" and all throw mashed potatoes at Dedrek, all hitting him. "Dedrek's outta there!" Chris announced. 3 to 2. "Ah!! Sacre bleu!!  Zis cannot be!!" Dedrek yelled, as he stormed off.

Samantha: What..... Terry: ..... was...... Ryan: ...... that?! How can you lose in the first 3 seconds?! Ugh!! Now, we're already behind!!

"Incoming!!" Samantha said, minutes later, as she threw mashed potatoes at Jeff, but missed. Jeff retaliated by throwing it at Terry, to no avail also. "Take this!!!" Terry yelled, throwing mashed potatoes at Ariel, hitting him. "Oh!! What!?" Ariel screamed, throwing potatoes at Terry, but missed. "Ariel's out! 2 to 2." Chris said.

Ariel: (covered in mashed potatoes) I could have taken them.... If it wasn't for that Terry. He's a good guy, but, dang, I wanted to stay in longer.

"Bombs away, dudes!!!" Jeff yelled, throwing a giant ball of mashed potatoes, knocking Terry out cold. "Terry's out!!" Chris said. He then noticed that Terry wasn't moving. "2 to 1. Medic!! Check on the little guy over there, Jeff kinda went off the deep end with that attack!"

Jeff: What can I say? (evil smile) I love a good food-fight. Terry: (in full body cast) .... Stupid Jeff. (pouts)

Terry shakes off the mashed potatoes on his face to notice the coveted Hall Pass was also there. Terry gasped, "Oh, yay!!!! I got the Pass!!" Terry looks over to Jeff and winks, "Thanks, Jeffie!!" Jeff snapped, then went back to the challenge.

Samantha then noticed that she was the only one left on her team. She looked at the mashed potatoes, as her arms transformed into scoopers. She, then, barraged the Screaming Pencils with multiple scoops of potatoes. Unfortunately, Zach dodged every single scoop, but Jeff was hit in the face, rather hard. "Oh!!" Jeff groaned, as he was hit. "I'm hit! I'm hit!!" Jeff gargles and goes down on the ground. Zach looked at Samantha, who stared back at him. "It's just you and me now, crazy girl," Zach said, confidently. Samantha closed her eyes, "Yeah, well, I--" she was cut off. "Think fast!!" Zach said, throwing a bullet of a scoop of mashed potatoes, hitting her in the chest. Samantha stared at the mashed potatoes in her shirt and giggled, "It tickles, hehe!" "Zach, Jeff, Ariel, and the Screaming Pencils winnnnnn!!!" Chris announced, as the other Screaming Pencils cheered behind him. "Killer Pens.... Yet again, I'll be seeing you at our Detention Hall Ceremony.

Ryan: (meditating) I'm gonna keep it together, I'm gonna keep it together, I'm gonna keep it together, I'm gonn-- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-- (confessional cutoff)

Jeff high-fived Zach, "Yes, bro, that's how we roll!!" Zach laughed and smiled, "Heh... Thanks, man."

At the Detention Hall Ceremony, the Killer Pens are seen, casting their votes. Again, the camera went down the row to hear the voters. "It's all your fault we lost. No one else deserves to go home, but you!" Ryan said, locking in a vote. "At least Sam tried, you got out wayyy too early," Johnathan commented, locking his vote in. "Ryan told me to vote this person off. I'm in his alliance.  I have no choice.  Oh, well, at least I'm safe," Terry said, smiling and locking a vote in. "Zis is unacceptable! Samantha, you're outta here!" Dedrek announced, locking a vote in. "So.... Do I just press a button? Ooh! There's a picture of me!" Stefani asked, randomly voting herself out. "Ryan said you're gone, so........ You're gone!" Samantha said, with confidence.

"Time's up...... again!" Chris announced. He reads off names on a card, "Stefani, Terry, Ryan, and Johnathan! Another A+ and another chance at the million!" After tossing the awards, Chris gets serious, "Tonight's final Golden A+ goes to................................... Samantha!!!! Heh, duhhh." Samantha caught her award, waiting on Dedrek to respond. "Dedrek?" Chris asked. Dedrek had his hand out with his eyes, closed, expecting an award. He opened them to see that he didn't receive one. "You're outta here, man," he said, seriously. Dedrek's eyes widened, "What!? How could you all vote me out?!  What did I do?  Zit was Sam who cost us zee game!!" Ryan looked at Dedrek, "Oh, don't even give us that crap! Who loses a food fight in 2 and a half seconds!?" Dedrek remained silent. An intern then grabbed Dedrek and forced him to walk the Walk of Shame before he could argue more.

The scene switches outside to Dedrek, leaving the school. "And, so, we say goodbye to little Frenchy," Chris said, laughing. "Oh, well, I hope he learned something while being here. If not, it's not my fault.  Dedrek receives 14th place, and with only 13 sheer-forced competitors left, who knows what's in store for next week!  Will Tammi mention Nalyd...... again!?  Will the Killer Pens actually win another elimination challenge before the Finals get here?!  And, most importantly, who will win the $1,000,000!?  Stay tuned for more Total... Drama.... 1-0-1!!" The scene then faded to black.

Chapter Nine: What Happens in Paris, Stays in Paris
"Last time, on Total Drama 1-0-1!!" Chris announced, standing in front of the school. "We went with another all-out battle!" Chris exclaimed. "Your handsome host here, Chris McLean, pulled a string or two to get our producers to deem 'Lunch' as a school subject! And, we took full advantage of that!!  There were mashed potatoes everywhere in our 'dodgeball'-like mashed potato meltdown!!  Once again, the Killer Pens found themselves in the Loser's Circle, and booted out Dedrek for his poor mashed potato skills!" Chris walked over and sat down on the steps leading into Gilded Glory, "To me, that was a bit unfair. I would have eliminated one of the people that didn't do a single thing in the challenge, but, oh well, that's just me....... Chris. McLean.  Anyway, we're hitting up the country of love this week!  14 has turned to 13.  Let's see what surprises are in store for our school right now on Total.... Drama..... 101!!"

At this point, the camera went straight to a random confessional in the mansion. Ariel: (covering his nose) What is that!? Carter: (wearing a gas mask) There is a smell in the mansion. It. Freakin'. Stinks! Nobody knows what it is!! Jeff: (only his hand is shown in the camera, trying to "grab" air) I can't breathe, dude!! Air! Air! I need air!! (twitching noise) Johnathan: There's no more hope! (eyes water) It's too vile!! Katherine: (takes in a big whiff and falls out of her chair, passing out) Lilie: This stench is ridiculous! Can't we hire a maid or something!? (covers nose) Ryan: (puking in confessional and falling out of his chair) What is this odor?! (breathing heavily on the floor) I'm having palpitations! (puking noises are heard again) Samantha: (looking in a book) "Natural causes of random odors in your living environment include--" (confessional cutoff) Stefani: (still loopy from last episode, takes in a big whiff) Ewww, who patootie'd? (frowns) Tammi: (covering nose) Omigosh, omigosh!! It's putrid in this house! What is that stench!? (loudly coughs and passes out) Terry: (now in a wheelchair, bandages wrapped around body everywhere, gagging) Ewwwwww.... Chris!! What's going on in here?! Webby: (gags) Gah!! Who cut the cheese?!

Everyone stuck their heads out of the door to see Zach, walking around in the mansion, with green stink lines simmering on top of his head. Ryan gagged, "Gah!! Zach, do you need to borrow my soap?" Zach sighed, and continued walking around, nearly sobbing. Jeff looked at Zach, tried to walk up to him, but stopped as if a giant stink barrier was protecting Zach. Jeff took 4 steps back and yelled to him, "You okay, dude!? You're looking... and smelling... a little down!" Zach kept on walking, ignoring Jeff, and muttered, ".......... Alyssa."

Zach: Alyssa, babe, I miss you so much. I can't believe I never expressed my feelings for you. I don't even feel like doing anything anymore, now that I can't see you! (sobs) Alyssa!!! (the confessional camera begins to crack over Zach's stench, the confessional cuts off)

Terry's automatic wheelchair wheeled him out of his room to see how Zach is carrying himself. He approached Zach carefully, but, as he got to a certain distance to Zach, Zach's stench overrode the wheelchair's automatic controls. The wheelchair began going haywire, slamming Terry into doors and walls without Terry telling it to do so.

Terry: (looking a little more beat up) ........... Owwwwwwwwwww.

Chris then bust into the mansion, "Bonjour, les enfants l'école! (Hello, school children [schoolmates]!)" Everyone gathered into a group, away from Zach. "What did he say?" Ariel questioned. Ryan sighed, "He said 'Hello, schoolmates!' in French." Ryan widened his eyes and gasped, "Does that mean--" "Oui (Yes), Ryan! The next challenge subject is France!  We're going to Paris!" Chris exclaimed. Ryan jumped for joy, surprisingly, "Yes! Yes, baby, yes!!" "Now, Ryan, before you get your hopes up, I feel I must tell you that today's challenge, again, will be pas d'élimination, which is French for 'non-elimination'!!" Ryan literally froze in the air, during mid-jump, defying the Laws of Physics. Samantha dove under Ryan's shadow to try catching when he fell, though he landed on her face. "What?! Come on!  Non-elimination, again!?" Ryan screeched. "Hey, I don't make the rules," Chris lied. "Oh. Wait.  I do, mainly because I'm--" ".. Chris McLean," everyone but Ryan and Zach said, blandly." Zach stink lines arouse and go near Chris' nostrils, while he's explaining. "Ewwww," Chris said, "what is that smell?" Everyone pointed at Zach, who had his head down, still mumbling Alyssa's name. "Ugh," Chris sighed, "what's his problem?" "He's sad because Alyssa's gone." Johnathan said.  "I would be, too, if someone I liked just disappeared." "We're on a wrecked schedule today, folks!" Chris said to Johnathan and the rest.  "Chef!!!" Chef Hatchet, then, came out of nowhere and took Zach with him, evading the smell.

Terry: (still in wheelchair) You know what's worse than Zach's smell?? The fact that French is our next subject, and we eliminated Frenchy last week!! How freakin' ironic is that?!

"As I was saying, it kinda sucks for the Killer Pens right now, seeing as they eliminated the one person that could probably win them this challenge last week!" Chris said, laughing. The Killer Pens then eyed Ryan. "What?! You didn't have to listen to me!!  It's your fault!" Ryan said, trying to avoid the situation.

Ryan: (crosses arms) .......................... (quickly) Their fault! Peu importe, avec mon supérieur compétences de langue française, nous allons gagner de toute façon. (No matter, with my superior French speaking skills, we'll win anyway.) We don't need Frenchy!

At that point, the mansion literally rose from the ground, as the Total Drama Jumbo Jet was below it. The schoolmates, still in the mansion and Chris, minus Zach and Chef, were flying off to Paris literally on top of the Total Drama Jumbo Jet. Chris talked to the viewers, "Instead of surprising them again like we did last time, we just went with putting the plane below them." He winked and then turned to the competitors, "Due to the extreme speed this Jumbo Jet can go up to, we'll be in Paris, France, in about...... 2 seconds!" Everyone gasped and hung on for the lightning speed ride. As the plane and mansion made a crash-course-landing to a random area in Paris, Chris stepped off. The other schoolmates were right behind him, with their hair standing up straight over the rush they just experienced. After everyone fixed their hair, Chris started, "Ah... Paris. The creativity, the wonder.... the romance!"

Tammi: (sighs) The city of love... (heart begins to beat rapidly, loud enough where the viewer can hear it, a TD101 producers laughs off-screen again) Excuse me, a second. (takes a bat from the floor and goes off-screen, a loud thudding noise is heard, Tammi comes back with the bat; the top of it is nearly broken off) What was I saying? Oh, yes. The city of loveeee. Nally would-- (covers mouth) UGH!! Why do I keep saying that?!

Chris looked at the schoolmates, "Alright, let's get thi-- Are we missing somebody?" Everyone looked around and all at once said, "Zach." "Oh. Yeah!  That's right." Chris remembered. "Due to Zach's... uhh.... hygienic problem right now, he's not going to be participating in this challenge. Ordinarily, I wouldn't allow it, but this is non-elimination, so who cares?  I'm sure he'll snap back next week....... Hopefully."

Back inside the mansion/plane, Zach was in the cafeteria with Chef. "What's yo' problem, boy!?" Chef asked Zach, to which Zach responded with a sigh. "....... Tell me!" "It's Alyssa, okay! Alyssa!!" Zach replied. "So... You're not gonna take a shower or anything because of a girl?" Chef asked, grumpily. Zach sighed. Chef stared at him, "Boy, you done lost it. And, now I'm stuck with you!  As long as you're around me, you're gonna do something!" Chef gave Zach a washcloth and gloves and pointed to the master sink in the kitchen, "Wash those dishes!!" Zach looked at the washcloth as if he didn't know what it was. "You know, there's a 40% chance that--" Zach was interrupted. "I don't care!! Wash those dishes!" Chef shouted, about to leave, "They better be sparkling by the time I get back."

Outside, Chris was still explaining things, "Okay, let's get this fun fest started!! Our subject for today is French, and we're going to see just how well you guys are at translating French words.  Behind me, you'll see two podiums, one for the Killer Pens and one for the Screaming Pencils!  4 of you, from each team, will be at these podiums since we still have a numbers difference.  Round by round, a member of each team will be at the front of the line, behind the podium.  They will hear a word, and if they think they know what the word means in English, they hit the buzzer.  If they are correct, their team gets a point, if they are wrong...." Chris laughs, "you'll find out." "What do you mean by that?" Lilie asked, confused. "I mean exactly what I said! If you buzz in and get the translation wrong, you'll find out what happens!" Chris exclaimed. "Now, I have already pre-chosen which four from each team will go to represent, and here they are!!" Chris pointed to a monitor that descended behind him out of nowhere.

Everyone stares up at the list.

Katherine: I'm okay with French, I guess. Bonjour (Hello) means..... (pause)..... uhhhhhh.... (confessional cutoff) Ryan: I'm going first! Easy point for our team! Stefani: (still loopy from last week) French is the "Ho-la" language...... right?

"Okay!! First team to 5 points win!! Everyone, get to your places!" Chris beamed. Tammi got up in front of the Screaming Pencils' podium with Carter, Katherine, and Jeff behind her. Ryan did the same for the Killer Pens' podium with Johnathan, Samantha, and Stefani behind him. "I'm ready, Chris!!" Ryan squealed, excitedly. Chris walked off-screen. "Hey!" Tammi said. "Where are you going?!" "Aren't you gonna tell them the words?" Webby asked The camera went back over to Chris, "Oh, I'm not going to be calling the words out. I don't know any French...... But, he does!!" The camera panned over to a location, and Mr. Frenchy himself, Dedrek, walked into view. "'Allo, you ungrateful pieces of fromage (cheese)!" Dedrek said, mysteriously. Tammi buzzed in, "Cheese!!" "I wasn't ready yet, you!!" Dedrek responded. Chris broke them up to talk, "We've brought Dedrek back to host the Trivia challenge, since I can't think of French words right off the spot. He'll call out the words to you, while I will be at his side, changing the score!  First to 5 points wins!"

Ryan: (smiling) Chris, I hope you understand that (yells and frowns) you're making me miserable!!

"Are we all ready?" Chris questioned. All 8 schoolmates shook their heads. "Good! Without further ado, take it away, Dedrek."

(Instead of having Dedrek say the person is right or wrong each time, the words that the contestants call out will either be green to signify they are correct, or red signaling they are wrong.) Dedrek cleared his throat, "Alright! Tammi vs. Ryan........ vous!" Ryan buzzed in, " You! " Chris changed the score, as Ryan and Tammi went to the back of the line. "Carter vs. Johnathan," Dedrek announced, "le!" Carter buzzed in, " The! " "The what?" Stefani said from behind, causing Ryan to smack his head. Stefani heard this and turned around to Ryan, "What are you doing!? Don't you know you get wrinkles faster that way??" Ryan stared at her.

Ryan: (staring into the camera)......................... (slowly pulls out a girls' hand mirror, confessional cuts off)

"It's 1 to 1," Chris reminded everyone, as Katherine and Samantha went up to the podium. "Elle!" Dedrek yelled. Katherine immediately buzzed in, " Foot! ". Chris imitated a buzzer to let her know that she was wrong. At that point, the pads that Webby, Tammi, and Carter lit up, and the three of them were mildly electrocuted. Chris gave the Killer Pens a point, since Katherine got her word wrong. After the electrocution, Tammi, Webby, and Carter were breathing hard. "Chris!!" Webby exclaimed. "................... That was awesome!!!" "I'm glad you liked it, I sure didn't!" Carter heavily scowled. The Killer Pens' trivia team were then seen laughing. "That's what I was talking about, guy," Chris said to Carter. "If you get your word wrong, the other team gets a point, and your teammates, i.e. you, Tammi, and Webby in this case, pay the price by getting a little shock. Shocking, isn't it?!" A rimshot is heard, but none of the schoolmates laughed. "Okay, then," Chris said. "On top of the point that the other team earns, they get a shot at guessing the right word! Same rules apply, if their team gets it wrong, they'll be in for a surprise!  Dedrek?" "Killer Pens?" Dedrek asked. Samantha spoke up, "Is it she ?" Dedrek and the Killer Pens clapped for Samantha, as she and Katherine, go to the back of the line.

Webby: (smacks head) How do you get "foot" out of "she"? I may fail at French, but I'm not that bad. (confused look)

Chris changed the score respectively, "With the point steal and getting the word correct, Samantha bumps up the score. It's 1 to 3, with the Killer Pens out in front!" Samantha squealed in the background, but then looked behind her... looking at visibly nothing. Samantha started talking, "Now, Manfred, don't be jealous. You'll get one soon." She smiled and turned back around to see everyone staring at her. "Uhh.... What?" Samantha asked.

Ariel: That girl... Jeff: ... is really... Webby: ..... weird.

Webby and Stefani approached the podiums. "Il!" Dedrek threw out. Nobody bugged in. Stefani was looking up at the sky, while Webby was looking down at the ground. "Oh, boyyyyy," Chris said, sarcastically.

Back in the mansion, Chef re-entered the Kitchen to see Zach, not washing dishes, but making out with a mop with brunette-colored strings instead of gray ones, as usual. "Z--," Chef opened his mouth to yell, but then, looked to see how disgusting it was, and backed away slowly out of the kitchen.

Chef: Poor, poor boy... I remember when I was like him. Cocky,.... random,.... kinda ugly. But, look how I turned out! (a fly flies past Chef's left hand, he grabs it and squishes it with no problem, threw it up very high in the air, and opened his mouth; the confessional cuts off)

Back outside, Chris was growing impatient over waiting on Stefani and Webby to say something. Finally, Stefani rang in and said, " What are we supposed to be doing ?" Chris shook his head, and Ryan, Johnathan, and Katherine's pads lit up, causing them to get electrocuted. "That wasn't her guess!" Ryan exclaimed. "She rang in," Chris said, changing the score to '2 to 3 - Advantage: Killer Pens', "so, that means I have to take it." "Screaming Pencils, any guesses, s'il vous plaît (please)?" Dedrek asked. Webby stayed staring at him, motionless. "Oui (Yeah), the answer was 'him', guys." Webby to the back of his line, along with Stefani. Ryan & Tammi approached the podiums again. "Arrêter!" Dedrek announced. Tammi buzzed in, answering slowly and calmly, "Well, Dedrek, it's very obvious that the answer is simple, it's amazing to hear, and it is--" Dedrek and Chris imitate buzzers. "You took too long!" Dedrek said. Chris shakes his head, gives the Killer Pens another point, and electrocutes Carter, Katherine, and Webby again. "What... a.... rush!!" Katherine & Webby said, together. "Game point," Chris mentioned. "Killer Pens?" Dedrek asked, getting Ryan's attention. Ryan buzzed in, on accident. At that point, Samantha fake-pushed Johnathan, who butted in Ryan. Ryan turned around, " STOP! " Dedrek yelled, "Correct!! Correct!! The Killer Pens win it!" "Huh?" Ryan said, confused. "I just--" He was slapped by Johnathan, to which Ryan said, "Ohhhhhhh..."

"2 to 5! Ryan, Johnathan, Samantha, Stefani, and the Killer Pens are the victors!" Chris announced. "This is a reward challenge, so I'll give you the reward of staying here..... in Paris..... with Dedrek!!" The Killer Pens gasped. "You can't do that!" Terry said, "He hates us!" "You shouldn't have voted him off, then," Chris added. "With the Killer Pens here in Paris and the Screaming Pencils coming back with me to Canada. What will become of the Pens?  What will become of Tammi and.......... nevermind.  What will happen with these enemies with each other for a whole week!?  Find out next time on Total.... Drama.... 101!!" The camera fades to black.

Chapter Ten: Little Class of Songs
"Last time on Total Drama 101...," Chris said, outside the school. "a weird, bizarr-o smell haunted the schoolmates and killed their mornings. Later snooping found out that it was Zach who was stinking up the place by not taking care of himself, because of the beautiful Alyssa's vote off!  I hated it, the crew hated it, and Zach.... didn't care.  Since the challenge for last week was non-elimination, I decided to make it where Zach wouldn't participate in the challenge at all!  The subject was French, and while we all went to Paris, Zach stayed inside the plane with Chef for a little.... uh.... kitchen duty.  Meanwhile, outside, I introduced the cast to an old friend of theirs: the most recently-voted out Dedrek!  The challenge was for the teams to participate in a French word translation challenge.  Instead of hosting this event, I let Dedrek do it, since we ran into him.  It was neck-in-neck after a while, but Ryan's stupid blundering pulled the desperate win out for the Pens!! I feel kinda bad for the Pens to be honest. Even though they clearly won the battle, you gotta know if they won the war since, for a week, they had to be......... with Dedrek! The Killer Pens are back at the mansion, and Zach seems to now be taking care of himself. Another sing-off, this week. But, this one's gonna be a bit different! 13 turns to 12 tonight on this exciting episode of Total.... Drama..... 1-0-1!!"

After the theme song, the scene cut to everyone in the cafeteria. The Screaming Pens are all at one table. Jeff sits down next to Katherine. "So, I was thinking," Jeff said in a seductive tone, as he walked up Katherine's arm with his fingers. Katherine immediately started laughing. "What's so funny?" Jeff asked, confused. "You were thinking!?" Katherine loudly said, where everyone heard it. At that point, everyone turned to Jeff & Katherine to see who Katherine was talking about and began laughing at the scene. Jeff threw in a pity laugh, "Heh, yeah... Funny stuff." He put his head down.

Jeff: Ouch.... (pause).... Harshness.

"You really got him good there," Carter said to Katherine. "Oh, he knows I was just kidding!" "Bet ya $100 he doesn't think that." "Ha! You wish I had that kind of cash!! You're just all about money, aren't you?" "You could say I dabble." Carter winked.

Katherine: I think there's something wrong with his eye. He's got this weird twitchin' thang going on right now. He just twitched me, but I didn't want to be rude, so I didn't twitch back! (smiling) And people call me dumb sometimes. (chuckles)

"Really?" Carter looked at Jeff, who still had his head down. "It must take him a while to analyze the joke, then, because he didn't laugh." Katherine gave Jeff a hug while sitting down. Jeff's head sprang up, "Aw, I can't stay mad at you." he said, smiling. "Wait... You were mad?" Katherine asked, in a ditsy tone. "She's just a like a real Lindsay," Ariel said in a joking manner.

Elsewhere, muffled arguing was heard at the Killer Pens' table. The camera panned to their table to hear parts of it better. "Why don't you go get a life?!" Ryan said to Stefani. "Why don't you go buy a vowel!?" Stefani shot right back, a little angered. "That makes no sense!" Ryan roared.

The camera went back over to the Screaming Pencils. "Then again, she could be like a real Lindsay, now," Ariel said. Tammi was at the corner of the table, tinkering with her cell phone. "New message?" Tammi said. The phone displayed 'New Text Message from [Unknown].' "I'll check it later," she responded to herself. Tammi looked over to Zach, now clean. "Zach, can I speak with you?" Tammi asked. Zach looked up, "Ehh... I don't really want--" "It wasn't a question. Please come here, now." "Yes, it w--" "Get over here!!!" Zach ran over to where Tammi was sitting. "You're lucky I don't boot you out of the alliance because of that." Tammi told him. "Now, listen. Since we had to vote your little girlfriend out, we--" "She's not my girlfriend!" Zach spoke out. "Oh, please! We all know you love her.  I even heard from Chef that you were kissing a broom that looked like her," Tammi fired back. "It was not a broom................. it was a mop," Zach corrected her. Tammi had a small baby barf but continued. "Okay, as I was saying, there's only 2 of us in this alliance. And, we're actually getting closer to the end of this stupid show.  I want the both of us to go far in this game, so we need to think of someone else that could join us to get rid of some of these slackers.  Any ideas?" "Well, I think that--" Tammi closed Zach's mouth. "That's enough ideas. We're gonna ask Ariel.  Cool?" Tammi demanded. Zach tried to speak up but Tammi covered his mouth again, "Cool."

Webby comes to sit down at the Pencils' table, after staring at the vending menchine, a little sad. "Oh, badunka-dunks!! I would kill for a candy bar right now," Webby said. Lilie heard this, "Oh, here you go!" She handed Webby a bill. Webby looked at it as his eyes grew wide. "Uh, Lilie?" Webby said. "This is a $100 bill." "Yeah, I know." "And, you're just gonna give it to me?" "Yeah... Why not?" Lilie showed Webby her purse, filled with money, "I have a lot more." Webby looked in it, and farted over the obscene amount of money she had. He began to back away slowly.

Webby: DUDE!! She's stinkin' loaded!! I mean, she-- (pause) Wait... If she has all that money, then why is sh-- (a light bulb appears on top of Webby's head) Hey, a bulb! That must mean.... uhh... (a second light bulb appears next to the first one) I'm thinking!

The camera followed Webby as he went back over to the vending machine, however stopped at the Killer Pens' table to observe them. Ryan and Stefani were looking at each other. "What's with you two?!" Johnathan asked, trying to be the mediator. "I found lipstick on my lips when I woke up this morning!" Ryan yelled. "Then, I found this tube of lipstick with 'Stefani' written on it!" "Come on!!" Stefani argued. "You looked prettyful with that shade on!" Stefani smiled, as Ryan scoffed. Ryan looked over at Terry, "You!! Wheelchair boy!!" "Me?" Terry looked over. He wheeled over to Ryan; Ryan whispered something in his ear. Terry looked a bit confused, then went over to Stefani. "Prettyyyyy boyyyy," Stefani said, in a loopy way. Terry's eyes grew wide.

Terry: (over-hyperventilated) What do I do? What do I do? What do I do? What do I do? (gets close to the camera) She just called me hot!!!

"Uhh..." Terry said, shakily. At that point, Stefani, jumped into Terry's lap in his wheelchair and began to make out with him. The remaining Killer Pens gasped at what was going on. This got the Screaming Pens' attention, as well. Webby was in mid-chew of his candy bar when Stefani & Terry kissed. When he looked over, the candy in his mouth fell out when his jaw dropped. Samantha let out a wolf whistle, "You go, boy!! Aroooooooooooooo-oooooooo!" Stefani finally stops making out with Terry. "... Terry?" Johnathan said. He looked at Terry, who had passed out in his wheelchair 3 seconds into the kiss. Ryan looked at the two of them. Sarcastically, he said, standing, "Figures. Loopy and Moopy will together better than Brad and Angelina!" Everyone pondered what Ryan had just said. Finally, Johnathan spoke up, "Ryan, you see where Brad and Angelina are now. Was that a compliment or an insult?" "Ugh.... It was an in-- Uhh... It was-- I mean-- Wha-- UGH! I don't know what it was!!" Ryan scoffed, sitting back down.

At that point, Chris came on the intercom, "All school-mates re-report back to the Choir Room in the next 5 minutes!!" Ariel got up, "I think we're singing again." Tammi listened to Ariel, and tried turning on the charm, "Oh, my gosh! I never would have guessed that!  Ariel, you're so smart!  If only I could have your massive brainpower." Ariel laughed, "Ah, you probably do. You have a lot of potential.  Tammi got up and caught up with Ariel. She grabbed his arm to stop him, "Awe, you're so nice," she said, letting go. Ariel went on to the Choir Room, "Hey, thanks!" he said, leaving.  Jeff looked at the two of them, leaving together.

Jeff: (laughing) Ariel... (laughs a little more) And Tammi!?!? (laughs like crazy) Oh, dang, dude! I believe in miracles, now!! (falls out of chair) Oh, my ribs!! Tammi: Classic... manipulation. The olllllldest trick in the book. Ariel's gonna be with us in a matter of minutes..... As long as Zach doesn't mess anything up.

Both teams gather in the Choir Room, with Chris walking in right behind them. "Isn't it amazing to be back in the Choir Room?!" Chris announced. "I can hardly contain myself," Carter said blandly. Chris ran to the window, "Our first seasonal major injury." He pats the window, saying, "Ohhh, Tammi." He, then, ran around in the area of the room, "And, this is where Webby plucked one of Tammi's last nerves." Webby began chuckling. "Oh, the memories," Chris ended. "Can we get on with this?! I have a facial to get to after this!" Ryan said to Chris. Chris got directly in front of Ryan, "Get any girler, and you're gonna get got, get it?" Ryan bended back over Chris being directly over him. "Got it," he said, sarcastically.

Ryan: (the TD101 producers play around with the camera to project Ryan's voice to make it high-pitched) Who does he think he-- Hey! What gives!? (voice gets higher) What's up with this co-- Hey!! It got higher! Chris! (voice gets squeaky high) Come fix this confessional before I-- UGH!!

"I'll cut to the chase," Chris said to everyone. "I've been reading tons of e-mails from our fans and they loved the Music episode we did a few weeks ago! And, you guys know my golden rule here.... No Fans = No Publicity = No Paycheck!  I gotta keep my fans-- I mean, our fans..... happy.  So, we're doing another Music challenge!  Only this time, let's kick it up a notch.  We're going full-out Choir!!  Instead of one person singing for each team, every, single person in front of me needs to sing or do something for your team, this time!  Same rules as the Music challenge applies.  Best performance to me wins... and no, that does not mean you have to suck up..................... Tammi." Tammi looked at Chris, and delicately waved at him. "But, you can if you want," Chris said, quickly. "And, I promise I won't factor it into my scoring. So, don't even try!"

"We've got to perform the same song we did last time!" Tammi said to Chris and the Screaming Pens. "Oh!" Chris said, "Thanks for reminding me! Another different thing... This time, dudes, you won't be choosing yourself which song you're going to sing." Chris takes out 5 sheets of paper that all have a big 'HOMEWORK' heading on top of them, "Instead, you'll be randomly choosing one of these 5 able-to-be-transformed-into-group............. songs!" "Drek," Carter said. "Oh, come on! It could be fun!" Lilie said, smiling. Everyone else on her team shot a deathly, evil gaze at her.

Lilie: Well, sue me for staying positive for once.

Ariel went up to Chris and chose a Homework sheet for the Screaming Pencils. He read it, "Hot 'n' Cold by Katy Perry.......... Oh, boy."

Katherine: Oooooooooooh, party song!!! (smiles) Jeff: Who the (bleep) is Katy Perry!? Tammi: I could care less about this challenge. It's in the bag. I'm still focused on getting Ariel, but I need to do that later. Zach: (out of nowhere) Did you know that Seoul is the capital of Korea right now? (laughs) I just found that out.... Also, we're singing a girls' song. Kinda wish I didn't know that piece of information.

After discussion on how they were going to perform, the Screaming Pencils went up on stage. "You guys ready?!" Chris yelled. "No," Zach responded. Tammi hit him, "Ready!" "Cue music!" Chris said.

(Screaming Pencils' song start) (Lilie is seen in front of Zach; Tammi in front of Ariel; and Katherine in front of Jeff) Lilie: (to Zach) You change your mind, like a girl changes clothes. Tammi: (to Ariel) Yeah, you PMS, like a girl I would know. (tears form in Ariel's eyes) Katherine: (to Jeff) And you always think, always speak, cryptically. (Jeff gasps) All Girls: (to all 3 boys) I should know that you're no good for me! (Zach, Ariel, and Jeff take off running around the stage with Lilie, Tammi, and Katherine right behind them)

All Girls: 'Cause you're hot and you're cold, You're yes and you're no, You're in and you're out, You're up and you're down!

You're wrong, when it's right, It's black and it's white, We fight, we break up, We kiss, we make up!

Carter & Webby: (as backup vocalists, running behind the girls) [You!] All Girls: You don't really wanna stay, no! Carter & Webby: [But, you!] All Girls: You don't really wanna go, oh!

All Girls: 'Cause you're hot and you're cold, You're yes and you're no, You're in and you're out, You're up and you're down!

(Lilie, Tammi, and Katherine corner Zach, Ariel, and Jeff on the stage) Lilie: (to all boys) We used to be just like twins, so in sync. (the boys frown) Tammi: (to all boys) The same energy, now's a dead battery! (the boys sadden) Katherine: (to all boys) Used to laugh 'bout nothing, now you're plain boring. (the boys fake cry) All Girls: (to all boys) I should know that you're not gonna change! (Zach points to a door, and the 3 boys try to escape out of it, but sees the 3 girls on the other side of it dancing)

All Girls: (dancing around with Carter and Webby dancing in their background) 'Cause you're hot and you're cold, You're yes and you're no, You're in and you're out, You're up and you're down!

You're wrong, when it's right, It's black and it's white, We fight, we break up, We kiss, we make up!

(Zach, Ariel, and Jeff are staring at the girls, Carter, and Webby) Carter & Webby: (dancing) [You!] All Girls: You don't really wanna stay, no! Carter & Webby: [But, you!] All Girls: You don't really wanna go, oh!

You're hot and you're cold, You're yes and you're no, You're in and you're out, You're up and you're down!

(Jeff gets the other guys attention, and the 3 make another run for it; Lilie, Tammi, and Katherine grab three bikes and chase after them) Lilie: Someone! Call the doctor! (Zach looks back, screaming) Tammi: Got a case of a love bi-polar! (Ariel looks back, trying to run faster) Katherine: Stuck on a roller coaster! (Jeff looks back, about to wet his pants) All Girls: Can't get off this ride!

You change your mind, like a girl changes clothes....

(Ariel trips, which causes the other two guys to fall behind him) All Girls: (crowd around the 3 boys on the ground) 'Cause you're hot and you're cold, You're yes and you're no, You're in and you're out, You're up and you're down!

You're wrong, when it's right, It's black and it's white, We fight, we break up, We kiss, we make up!

Carter: (holds up a "You" sign) [You!] All Girls: (pointing their fingers in the boys' faces) You don't really wanna stay, no! Webby: (holds up a sign that has a butt, a plus sign, and the word "You") [But, you!] All Girls: You don't really wanna go, oh!

All Girls: (get away from the boys and go behind the curtain to get something; the boys look confused; girls still singing) You're hot and you're cold, You're yes and you're no, You're in and you're out, You're up and you're down! (the girls come out all smiling in wedding dresses, wearing matching rings with the things they're holding; Lilie looks at Zach and comes out with a frog; Tammi looks at Ariel and comes out with a horse; Katherine looks at Jeff and comes out with a brick) (Screaming Pencils' song end)

"Scene!!" Webby announced, as everyone bowed. Still hunched over from bowing, Webby said, "So, what did you think, Chris?....... Chris??" Webby rose up to see that Chris was knocked out, cold. "Chris!!" Carter yelled, "Wake the (bleep) up, you (bleep) little (bleep, bleep, bleeeeeep), before I (bleep) your (bleep) happenin' (bleeeeeep)!!" Everyone stared at Carter for a while, who was breathing deeply over the energy it took for him to say that sentence. Jeff went over to Carter, "Dude.... Calm down. It's just a game." "I'm sorry... It's just that... when I do something I expect you to see to the end!! Don't fall asleep on me!! I get easily ticked off on that!" "Breathe in, man," Jeff said, as Carter did so. "Now, breathe out." Carter did so, again. "So, Chris, how was it?" Zach asked. Everyone looked over to Chris, but he was out of his chair. Instead, he poked his out from behind a Chef Hatchet cut-out, seeming to be scared of what Carter said to him. "Uhmm... It was..... good," Chris said, shaking a bit. "Can the Killer Pens just flippin' start already!?"

Katherine: Yeah, we're dead. (watches a fly buzz and fly around; Katherine kills it) Kinda like this little guy! (smiles)

"But, we don't know our song!" Terry said, with Stefani in his lap, refusing to move. Chris holds out the 4 remaining papers, "Well, why don't you two lovebirds come pick one?!" He began to laugh. "Fine...," Terry said. His auto-wheelchair went up to Chris, and Stefani snatched one of papers out of his hand. "Oooh, I love this song!! Graduation (or Friends Forever) by Vitamin C!" "We're singing a song about orange juice?!" Ryan yelped. "No, silly boy, Vitamin C is in milk!" Stefani said, happily. "That's milk, girl," Samantha said, correcting her. "So, we're sing about milk!? That's even worse!" Ryan said, pouting. "Enough with the chatty-chat," Chris said, as Johnathan smacked his head, "Take your marks!"

Johnathan: Milk?! (smacks head again and sighs) No brawn.... no beauty...... no brains. Come on, Ryan, you've got to have something!

The Killer Pens all gather on stage. In order, holding hands, Johnathan, Ryan, Samantha, Stefani, and Terry, get ready to sing.

(All 5 Killer Pens were seen swaying from left to right the entire song) All: And so, we talked all night about the rest of our lives, Where we're gonna be when we turn 25. I keep thinking "times will never change", Keep on thinking things will always be the same. But when we leave this year we won't be coming back, No more hanging out 'cause we're on a different track. And if you got something that you need to say, You better say it right now cause you don't have another day. 'Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down, These memories are playing like a film without sound. And I keep thinking of the night in June, I Didn't know much of love, but it came too soon. And there was me and you, and then it got real blue, Stay at home talkin' on the telephone and We would get so excited, we'd get so scared, Laughing at ourselves, thinking life's not fair. And this is how it feels:

(Johnathan steps out of the line and goes up to a microphone) Johnathan: (nearly perfect) As we go on, we remember, All the times we had together. And as our lives change, from whatever, We will still be, friends forever.

(Johnathan steps back into the line) All: So, if we get the big jobs and we make the big money, When we look back now, will that joke still be funny? Will we still remember everything we learned in school? Still be trying to break every single rule. Will little, brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man? Can Heather find a job that won't interfere with her tan? I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye, Keep on thinking, "it's a time to fly". And this is how it feels:

(Ryan steps out of the line and goes up to a microphone) Ryan: (average) As we go on, we remember, All the times we had together. And as our lives change, from whatever, We will still be, friends forever.

(Ryan steps back into the line) All: La, la, la, la; yeah, yeah, yeah. La, la, la, la, we will still be friends forever.

Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now? Can we survive it out there? Can we make it somehow? I guess I thought that this would never end, And suddenly it's like we're women and men. Will the past be a shadow that will follow us round? Will these memories fade when I leave this town? I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye. Keep on thinking, "it's a time to fly".

(Samantha stiffly steps out of the line and goes up to a microphone) Samantha: (shakily) As we go on, we remember, All the times we had together. And as our lives change, from whatever, We will still be, friends forever. (Samantha goes back to the line)

(Stefani bow-leggedly steps out of the line and goes up to a microphone) Stefani: (a little shaky) As we go on, we remember, All the times we had together. And as our lives change, from whatever, We will still be, friends forever. (Stefani returns to the line)

(Terry wheels out of the line and goes up to a microphone) Terry: (average) As we go on, we remember, All the times we had together. And as our lives change, from whatever, We will still be, friends forever. (Terry goes back into the line, everyone raise their hands up, still linked together, and takes a bow)

"How 'bout them apples!?" Ryan yelled out, "Am I right, Chris?..................... Chris?" Everyone looked to, again, see that Chris wasn't in his chair. Again, he was behind the Chef Hatchet cardboard cutout, sobbing over the sadness of the song. Samantha went over to the cut-out to eavesdrop. "Jordan," Chris said, sobbing. "I miss you, man...... Yeah..... Well, I just heard this amazing song, and it remi--" Before Chris could even finish, Samantha lifted her hands up, hitting the cutout making it topple over Chris. "He just said our song was amazing!!" Samantha said. The Killer Pens began to cheer, as the Screaming Pens stare them down. Chris's hand comes from out under the cutout, in a 'thumbs up' position, "The Killer Pens win!!! Pencils, you're going to the D-Hall Ceremony!" Chris said, sobbing.

Chris comes out from under the cardboard standout, holding the coveted Hall Pass. Obviously, everyone rushes up to Chris. "Tut, tut, tut, tut, tut!" Chris said. "If you want the Hall Pass this time, you're gonna have to work for it. This one's going to be humiliating.  Any takers?!" "No way I'm letting a single one of those Pencil-necks be immune!" Ryan said. "You should all be worried, so I'm getting that pass to make sure you don't! Bring it, Chris!" No one else said a word. "Ryan, are you sure you want to do this?" Chris asked, trying to get him to consider. "If I wasn't sure, would I have volunteered!? Now, gimme that Pass!" Ryan shouted. "Fine," Chris said to Ryan. "Makeup!!" he yelled to the interns. Female interns rushed over to Chris and began putting makeup on him. "Wait.. No, no.  Not me," Chris said to the interns. "We're doing Plan: PASS with Ryan. ATTACK!!" The interns then swarmed Ryan.

One of the interns threw a white dress on Ryan. "Hey, what gives?" Ryan asked, as another put a blonde wig on him. Another dashed some ruby red lipstick on his mouth, a fourth and fifth intern puts a fake house and fake lawn on stage. "What's going on?!" Ryan demanded to know. "You thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?" the first makeup intern said to the second one "Yessirree, bob," he said right back. The two interns shanghaied another intern not doing anything at that point. "Hey, what are you doing?" the sixth intern said to the first and second one. The first two interns put a blue and white shirt and khaki pants on the sixth intern. The fourth and fifth construction interns finished with the quick set. "You're not doing anything, bub, so you're helping Ryan with Plan: PASS!" the second intern said to the sixth one. Ryan looked over to the intern getting dressed and bucked his eyes out, "That outfit looks fam-- Wait.  No. No.  No, no, no, no, no, we are not doin--" Chris pops out from behind Ryan, randomly, "An edited version of Somewhere That's Green from The Little Shop of Horrors? Yes!  Yes, we are doing that!  And, you've already agreed to it, so you're doing it!  I had this little maneuver saved for you to do with Nalyd, but.... since you blockheads eliminated him, I found a quick substitute!"

Stefani came up to Ryan and looked at his lips, smiling, "Ha!! I told ya you would look prettyful with that shade on! It's the same one!!" Ryan quickly grabbed a mirror, looked, and groaned. "I didn't know you meant this!" Ryan shouted out to Chris, ignoring Stefani. "I am not about to humiliate myself this way!" "What about all that stuff you said about 'not letting us Pencil-necks get the Pass'?" Tammi asked, toying with Ryan. "You did say that," Zach said, backing her up. "You can forget this crap!" Ryan said. "How 'bout we do this: The set's already up, you're in a dress, the intern's in the man's suit.  So, if you don't do this.  I'll reverse the winners, give the Pencils' immunity, and you'll be eliminated!  How's that?" Chris said.

Ryan: Warning. What you're about to see is going to be incredibly humiliating. Those with weak constitutions should look away. (whispering) What I should be doing.

The scene cut to Ryan looking out of the window of the set's house and the male intern, with a lawnmower, about to mow the fake set lawn. "Fans, you're gonna love this!" Chris said to the camera. "Sing it up!" he also said, cuing the music to start.

(Plan: PASS song start) (The music of Somewhere That's Green begins to start; Ryan looks out the window as the intern begins to fake mow the lawn; Ryan sighs) Ryan: He rakes and trims the grass, He loves to mow and weed, (someone kicks a toy dog out into the stage and the intern catches it) I cook like Betty Crocker, And I look like Donna Reed. (shows a full view of Ryan in a long white dress)

There's plastic on my furniture (rubs hand across the plastic on the couch he's on) To keep it neat and clean, (goes over to dust a chair) In the Pine-Sol scented air, (grabs a can of air freshener on a table and sprays it in the house) Somewhere that's green. (baby barfs... spins around, spraying the can; the white dress becomes blue)

(Ryan and the intern are snuggled together on a couch, with frozen dinners and their "children" in front of them) Between our frozen dinners And our bedtime, 9:15, We snuggle watching Lucy, (snuggles tighter to watch television with kids) On our big, enormous 12.....inch..... screen. (shows a bite-sized television to the viewer)

I'm his December....... (cringes)... bride, (the intern leads Ryan through the halls) Random Intern, he knows best. The kids play Howdy-Doody, (the intern opens the door into the room where the kids are playing; the kids look like a mix of Ryan and the intern; they wave) As the sun sets in the west. (the intern keeps trying to get Ryan in "their" room, Ryan doesn't go in)

(Ryan is seen back at the window in his regular white dress) A picture out of "Better Homes and Gardens Magazine," (Ryan closes the Better Homes & Gardens Magazine) Someday I know, We two will go, (sobbing over the fact that he has to say that) Somewhere that's green. (puts hand near the window; camera zooms out) (Plan: PASS song end)

Chris turns the Hall Pass into an airplane and throws it at Ryan. Ryan literally rips off the dress he was wearing, showing his regular clothes. The Hall Pass airplane hits Ryan's forehead. He picks it, unwraps it, and shouts, "Yes!!" "Ryan," Jeff said, stifling a laugh with everyone else, "We're sorta wondering...." Everyone else is trying their hardest not to laugh. Jeff continued, "Dude or dudette, what gender are you!?" Jeff and the rest of the schoolmates burst out laughing. Ryan ignored the comment, waved the Hall Pass around, and walked off, smearing the lipstick off his mouth.

At the Detention Hall Ceremony, the Screaming Pencils are seen sitting, but don't have their voting devices. "It's time to vote!!" Chris said. "But--" Ariel started. "Oops... I guess I lied," Chris started again. "Your D Hallhelds (spoof of handhelds), you know, the things you used to lock your votes in, I took them up before the Ceremony started." "Why?" Katherine asked. "Because... someone has been disqualified from your team," Chris said, sadly. Lilie immediately stood up, thinking it was her, "Okay! Okay!! I'm going! But how did you know I was related to Donald Trump!?" Everyone looked at her, a little confused. "Lilie. I was talking about Carter," Chris said, looking at Carter. "What?!" Carter exclaimed. "Simmer down, before we get to you... Let's go to Lilie. What's this about Donald Trump?  He's rich!  Richer than me, even." Chris threw out. "You shouldn't be here competing if you already have money." Lilie gasped, "What if... I told you.... he doesn't give me money?" "So, now you're lying?" Chris accused Lilie. The Screaming Pencils were listening to Lilie and Chris go back and forth. "What do you mean 'I'm lying'?" Lilie said to Chris. "Webby-- uh.... An anonymous person has told me that you have an object of some kind filled with cash," Chris told her. Lilie looked down. "Is this true?" Chris said. "What.... What if it is?" Lilie said, a little scared.

Lilie: I knew being somewhat rich would be the death of me.

"If it is true, then you're going to be escorted out of here," Chris said. "You're not giving these people a chance to get money when you're already stinkin' loaded!" "So, I'm about to be eliminated for being related to a rich celebrity!? Seriously!?!?  What about Carter or... or... Katherine!?" Lilie yelled out. "Katherine's related to Ke$ha, and Katherine doesn't get any of her money, and I was getting to Carter. Anyway, she just admitted it!" Chris said. "Here ya go, take Lilie away!" Chris continued, throwing Golden A+'s to Katherine, Ariel, Jeff, Webby, Zach...... and Tammi. Katherine looked up, after receiving her "A", scared of what may happen, "Uhhhhh....... I made that up," she said quickly. "Bye, Lilie... Seeya," Ariel, Jeff, and Zach said, overlapping each other. Lilie was being escorted out of the Detention Hall Ceremony, "Wait!! No!  No!  You can't do this!  I'll-- I'll--  Ohhhh, I'll get you, Webby!!" Webby gulped, as he thought back to a flashback.

(flashback begin) (Before the challenge started, Webby was talking to Chris at the end of the line while walking in the halls to get to the Choir Room with everyone else) Webby: Chris? Chris: Yes, uh.... Webster? Webby: (sighs) I hate that nickname. It's Webby. Anyway, I have a "rules" question-thingy. Chris: Eh? Webby: If you're related to a rich celebrity, and you're playing here for money, is that really fair? Chris: I guess you could say that. I don't really care myself, as long I get to torture you guys. (laughs) Webby: (fake laughs) Yeah. I think it's Lilie that's related to Donald Trump... That's gonna be really messed up if she wins. Chris: Hmm.... (thinks) (Webby looks up ahead in the line) (flashback end)

"I just talked to Chris about it. I didn't know you would get eliminated!!" Webby shouted to Lilie as she was forced out the door. "This is all your fault!" Lilie said, sobbing. Lilie left the school on the Walk of Shame.

The Screaming Pencils remained silent........ still. "Well... 13 gets cut down to 12. But, apparently, we're still not finished." Chris looked over to the Screaming Pencils, "Carter, it looks like you get 12th place." "I still don't understand why I'm getting eliminated! So, I'm a little rich, too!  But, I'm not related to anyone," Carter said, abruptly. "Dude, you threatened me," Chris said to him. "So!? Lots of people did that the last few seasons!  Quit being a baby!" "Yeah, but they didn't do it like that. The only time people have swore would be at each other.  Take him away, too.  I'm gonna sound like a teacher and say 'some school rules apply'.  Don't threaten your 'teacher' that way." Chris said, winking at Carter. "Wha-- Wha-- This isn't a real school, though!" Carter said, as the same interns escorted Carter out of the room. "Bye, Carter!!" Ariel said, smiling and waving. "Do something about this, runt!!" Carter said, scolding Ariel. Ariel gasped and frowned.

Ariel: He... He called me a runt. I'm not that short! (frowns)

Tammi went over to "fake" comfort Ariel, "Oh, there, there." Ariel looked up at Tammi and hugged her. Tammi, extremely straining, hugged him back, trying to gain his trust. "Chris, what just happened?" Jeff asked. "You just lost two of your teammates, when it was supposed to just be one.... and a vote-off, at that," Chris answered him. "Can you do that?" Zach wondered. "I'm Chris McLean. Do I have to answer that question?" "I guess not. I can't believe that." Chris laughs, "I can. That kinda stuff makes some great television, dudes!!" Chris looked at the camera still in the Detention Hall room, "After that shocking double-elimination, we're down to 11 schoolmates. Will the Killer Pens become the dominant team?!  What future holds for Stefani & Terry?  And, who's going to come out on top and win this money!?  Hopefully not someone rich..... Tune in next week for more Total.... Drama....... 101!"

Chapter Eleven: Code - ORANGE
"Last time... on Total Drama 101!" Chris announced. "We got bucketloads of e-mails and letters and messages all from our fans saying that they loved Katherine and Nalyd in our Music challenge. And, you know how this show is:  we gotta make it good for the fans.  So, we brought it back!  Only this time, everyone in the teams had to do or sing something!  Fans, I hope you liked that one even more, dudes!  Meanwhile, after everything was said and done, Carter went on a ballistic rampage, accusing me of sleeping through their performance.... which I did, but you didn't have to swear at me, dude!!  That kinda stuff makes good television, but not when it's directed at me, man!  Anyway, I think I may have been a little loopy or something that week, because, all the producers and staff are mocking me over how he intimidated me.  I'm not even gonna try remembering any of it.  Anyway, just when things were looking up for the Pens, things looked even higher for them as the Screaming Pencils, team domination, lost 2 people at once in our most shocking Detention Hall Ceremony yet! Carter for his behavior towards me, and yes, I can do that....... and Lilie, for trying to steal money out of others more deserving. The girl's related to Donald Trump, for Pete's sake. Anyway, the both of them were eliminated, causing a depressing loss for the Screaming Pencils. In terms of numbers, they're still the dominating team, but who knows what's in store for all of them. Let's check it out right now on Total... Drama.... 1-0-1!"

After the theme song ends, the camera goes into Zach's room, where Zach and Tammi are present, sitting on Zach's bed, talking. "You know," Zach began, "People are beginning to think you are about to start a love triangle with Ariel & Nalyd." Tammi quickly looked up to Zach, "Who cares? It's not true.  I don't love Ariel, and everyone knows I don't love Nalyd."

Zach: How much denial can a person store in their body? (snickers)

"Okay, whatever you say," Zach said, stifling a laugh. "Even you know that I'm only doing that stuff to get Ariel on our side," Tammi responded to the laugh. "Mhm, mhm." "Keep it up, Zach, and you'll be going down with the rest of this team."

The scene then switched to Ariel, Jeff, and Katherine, wandering in the foyer of the mansion. Ariel stopped in his tracks, causing Jeff and Katherine to stop. "What's up, bro?" Jeff asked. Ariel was looking upwards at the stairs that lead to the Master Bedroom. "You guys ever been up there?" Ariel asked, still looking up. "Nope," Katherine said. "Can't say I have, dude," Jeff told him. "Ryan's always couped-up up there. I'd like to see what's so special," Ariel said in a longing way. "Then.... go up there, silly-billy!" Katherine assured him. Ariel eyed Katherine, "I don't really want to go up there alone." "All you had to do was ask," Katherine said. At the moment, she was holding Jeff's hand. Ariel raced up the stairway, with Katherine and Jeff, apparently, following him. Jeff stopped at the left side of the closed door, Katherine at the right. Ariel took a deep breath, "I'm goin' in!" he said, trying to sound like an action hero.

Ariel: That was one of the bravest moments of my life, even if it was just a room. Ryan would probably have killed me if he knew I was in there.

Ariel pressed his ear against the door, immediately hearing water running. Believing that Ryan was in the shower, Ariel entered the room. He quickly noticed how much more luxurious the room was than his own. He approached Ryan's bed, only to find Ryan, himself, lying down on his bed with two teabags over his eyes, listening to calm, peaceful music on his radio. "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" Ariel screamed loudly, afraid that some alien had possessed Ryan's eyes. "What?!" Ryan screeched, taking off the teabags. "What's wrong with your eyes?!" Ariel freaked out. "Ugh, you are such a moron! It removes all bags from your eyes, duh!" Ryan shouted. Ariel scratched his head. "But, you don't have any bags," he said, confused. "And you don't have any brains!" Ryan shouted in response, throwing his radio at Ariel's head. Ariel widened his eyes and ducked before the radio could hit his head. Then, once it landed beside him and cracked into pieces, Ariel made a dash for it. Ariel ran out of the room, charging the door, hitting Katherine, as the door opened from the inside to the left. "I was just trying to get some peace on this frickin' show!" Ryan screamed angrily, bolting after Ariel and exiting his room, chasing him. Jeff goes over to care for Katherine. As he's doing this, he looks down to the foyer on the first floor to see Johnathan and Samantha watching Ryan chase Ariel.

"How long do you think this is going to go on?" Johnathan asked, as he and Samantha's heads followed Ryan chasing Ariel. "Probably about 5 more minutes. Ryan's bound to get tired at one point,"  Samantha said back "I'm thinking 2. Ryan's not that strong," Johnathan said. Samantha laughed at this comment.

Later, the camera went into Stefani's room to show her, asleep in her bed, tossing and turning. Seconds later, she woke up to Terry, who seems to have recovered and not in a wheelchair anymore, directly in her face with a rose. The camera then went back outside to show Ryan and Ariel's chase, outside of Stefani's door. A muffled punching noise was heard in the background, as Terry was punched through Stefani's door and landed on Ryan during mid-chase. "Get off, skeez! You weigh a ton!!" Ryan mouthed off to Terry, as Ariel got away. "I'm only, like, 150, dude," Terry said back.

At that point, an explosion and rumble was heard in the distance. Everyone stopped what they were doing. "Duck & cover!!" Katherine & Samantha said at the same time. Katherine ran down the stairs away from Jeff and ran frantically around the foyer of the mansion. "Guys, stop for a minute!" Terry yelled, as he got up. "What the fudge was that?" Webby asked. Another explosion was heard, scaring everyone. The remaining schoolmates ran out of the mansion and into the school. They began looking around for a few minutes, until they found Chris and Chef in Room 604, a Chemistry room, with many beakers of unusual solutions and liquids.

"Was that you, disturbing the peace?" Ryan asked, trying to sound smart to Chris. "Me?" Chris said, sarcastically, "Whatever could give you that idea?" Ryan groaned. "Is this place even safe?" Johnathan asked. "Not sure. I've just been mixing random chemicals!" Chris said as he poured a blue-tinted solution into a red-tinted one, causing another explosion noise. Everyone fell to the floor. Katherine got up and looked at all the chemicals.

Katherine: (excited) Omigosh, I love Chemistry! But, Chemistry doesn't really love me. Back at real school, a couple years ago, I was paired up with my good friend, Tanisha, for a Chemistry experiment. (looks around and whispers to the camera) Let's just say my folks are still paying for our lab's... uhh.... "cleanup". (winks)

Chris takes off the protective goggles he was wearing, "Well. Hopefully, if you're not stupid enough, you should be able to tell that our next challenge subject is Chemistry." Stefani, now seeming to have recovered again from her loopiness in past episodes, spoke up, "Oh, great." "What's the matter, Stefani?" Chris asked. "Did all your brain cells come back overnight?" Chris and Chef began laughing. "What are you talking about?" She asked, in a grumpy tone. Terry walked over to Stefani and wrapped his left arm around her, trying to score, "Hey, don't fun of her!" "Take it off... before I break it off," Stefani said, angrily. "Ooooh, tension!!!" Chris said, in the background. Terry looked at her, "Did that kiss mean nothing?" Terry began to frown. "What!?" Stefani eyed Terry. "You don't remember?" Terry began. "Okay, let me paint you a picture. You see, when we were in Spain, you got all loopy when yo--" Stefani couldn't take anymore, as she was randomly angry at the time. She punched Terry again, and he went down. "Looks like Stefani wears the pants in that relationship," Ryan whispered, making a few people laugh.

"Quiet, class. As I was saying...," Chris continued. "Today, we're focusing on Chemistry, or as some people call it, 'witchcraft'. You know, since we deal with all the beakers and containers and everything." "Ooooooh, fun," Tammi said, sarcastically. "Yeah, it will be," Chris assured her. He walked over to two large tables, covered with team colored sheets. He uncovered them to revealed 7 large beakers, filled with solutions tinted with the colors of the rainbow, one of each colored red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo (dark blue), and violet (purple). "What's in those?" Terry asked. "Random chemicals!" Chris answered him. "Listen carefully. Our challenge today is figuring out who can make the biggest explosion out of these chemicals.  And, hopefully you've seen those cartoons of people mixing random things together and singeing their hair and all that good stuff.  We're going to try and recreate that!  Behind you are 7 chemicals for each team, all tinted with the colors of the rainbow.  It's your job to choose one schoolmate from your team so they can choose two of those chemicals to react with each other.  One of those chemicals will react with any of those to create a huge explosion.  One of them will not react with any of them and you won't get jack!!  The others are fairly average.  However, if you choose the chemical does react with anything and the chemical that does not react with anything, then again, you won't get diddly-squat!  Best explosion wins, so, you could say that this challenge is pretty random." Chris laughed, then went back over to Chef so the teams could choose their participant.

Ryan: The Pens have 5 people, the Pencils have 6, thanks to that double elimination. We need this game to tie it up! Tammi: We are so starting to totally suck right now. We need this win to get back on the "rightfully ours" track of winning. I do not settle for losing!

The Killer Pens huddled together. "Okay, who wants to choose for us?" Johnathan said, trying to bring everyone together. "Isn't it obvious?" Ryan told him. "I should." The rest of the Killer Pens began laughing. "Like we're really going to put our team in your hands," Stefani said, sarcastically. "Oh, just go back to your loopiness! We liked you better that way," Ryan told her. "Why does everyone keep saying that?" Stefani said, punching the floor in an arrogant manner. Johnathan looked at her, "You honestly don't remember anything?" "Remember what!?" Stefani said, angrily. "Sheesh, can ya calm down, princess?" Ryan asked her, smiling. Stefani pushed him down.

Ryan: (rubbing his head from when it hit the floor) (bleep)..... She's got an attud-inal problem.

The camera panned over to the Screaming Pencils. "Oh, oh, you've gotta let me do this one!! I'm perfect for this!" Katherine said. She then looked lovingly into Jeff's eyes, "Can you convince them to let me choose for our team....... Jeffy-bear?" She walked up Jeff's arm bicep with her fingers. Jeff melted in her hands, "Guys, I think Katherine should choose for us," he said, smiling. Jeff looked at Katherine, who turned around and looked at Ariel, who glanced at Webby, who looked at Zach, who eyed Tammi. Tammi sighed, "Fine, she ca--" Tammi's phone began to vibrate from last week as she still had a new message she never checked. She got her phone out, looked at it, and ran off, "Okay, Katherine can do it! I'll be right back!" Tammi ran out of the Chemistry room and into the hall.

Webby: I wonder what that was about. Zach: Tammi's so weird, sometimes, I swear....

Chris made a small explosion to let the schoolmates know that time was up. "Time's up, lab rats!!" Chris yelled out. "So! Who's pickin' for who?" The camera went over to the Killer Pens. Ryan began bravely walking out of the group to tell Chris he would do it, but the other 4 Pens grabbed him and threw him back, behind them all. Moments later, the group pushed Samantha out, literally. "Oooooooh, fun!!" Samantha said, bumping into Chris after being pushed. "Samantha for the Pens..... Pencils?" Chris looked over to the Screaming Pencils. Katherine soon stepped out. "Alright! So, it's Katherine vs. Samantha, 1 vs. 1, woman-o vs. woman-o, crazy vs. crazier! Who will win!?"

Chris waved his hand out to the chemicals on the tables, "Pick your poisons, girls!" Ariel gasped, reluctantly, "They're not really poisons, are they?!" The camera panned back over to Chris, who was now holding a bottle with a skull & crossbones label on it. "Uhhhh, no?" he said, quickly hiding it behind his back. Katherine went up first, trying to think on which two chemicals she should pick to create an explosion.

Katherine: I totally remember this from school! When I made that big explosion at my real school, I remember that I had a bottle with orange stuff, and a bottle with blue stuff. It's gotta be the same thing!............ Right? (confessional cut off)

Katherine was still observing the chemicals, trying to decide which ones to pick. Webby looked around, and saw a Periodic Table of Elements hanging on a wall of the room. "This could help!" Webby said, taking the table down and bringing it to his team. He placed it on another table near the team. "The Periodic Table?" Zach said, to Webby. "Well, it's better than nothing," Webby said right back. Jeff began scratching his head, "Dudes... Isn't that something she should ask her mom-dude about?" Webby looked over to Jeff and smacked her head, "Not that kind of periodic stuff!!" "Ohhhhh," Jeff said, sounding as if he were in a trance. Katherine came back over to her team. "Got it!" Katherine said, revealing the orange and blue solution beakers behind her back, "You sure those are the right ones, girl?" Zach asked her. "Uhhh..... Of course!" Katherine said, a tad unsure.

Webby: Something's up... Katherine: Orange and blue. Definitely! (smiles but then frowns; smacks her head) Ughhh... Or, was it orange and green!?

Out in the hall, outside of the classroom, Tammi was clutching her phone, and finally checked the message she had from last week. She read it silently, gasped, and then ran back into the classroom to the Screaming Pencils.

Tammi: That message was from Nalyd. It... It said, "I love you, Tamantha." (sighs deeply and lovingly, but then snaps back to reality) Not-- not that I love him! (looks upward, smiles, but then looks back at the camera and groans) UGH!!

"What's with you?" Ariel asked her. "Ohh... Oh, nothing!" Tammi lied. "What's going on?" "We're waiting on the Killer Pens to finish choosing their chemicals." "Alright." Tammi, breathing a little heavy over the message, looked over to the Killer Pens, as the camera panned over to their team.

Over at the Killer Pens' table, Samantha was staring at the 7 chemicals for about 3 minutes. "Can this go any slower?" Ryan complained. The camera went back over to Samantha, who was 'consulting' with her imaginary friends about which chemicals to choose. "No, Jeffrey, I don't think red will work," she said. "Ohhhh, you're right, sweetie, green does match my eyes!" The Killer Pens groaned, as Samantha finally picked the orange and green chemicals from the Killer Pens' table.

The scene switched to everyone wearing protective goggles and behind a thick layer of glass with a "Total Drama 101" logo on it. Chris, Samantha, and Katherine, with chemicals, stepped out and began the challenge. "Alright, let's get this disaster on the road!!" Chris said. "The two of you, at the same time, need to mix the chemicals together in those 2 green and red buckets. Green's for the Screaming Pencils, red for the Pens.  After the chemicals get mixed, you two need to race back behind this glass, because it's going to get a little messy and..... explosion-y.  Biggest explosion between the two wins!!" The Screaming Pencils began cheering on Katherine, as she stepped out, nervously. At the same time, Samantha stepped out of the glass, with the Killer Pens cheering her on.

Katherine added the blue solution to her team's bucket and a drop of the orange solution and ran back behind the glass and into Jeff's arms, as Samantha added all of her green solution to her team's bucket with a drop of the orange solution, running back behind the glass, as well. Everyone stared at the two buckets, as nothing happened for the first 2 minutes. "O-kayyyyyyy," Chris said, confused. "Well, in the event of a tie, w--" At that point, Samantha's bucket exploded, sending it flying into the air. The impact of the explosion was so major, the roof of the Chemistry room was blown off of it's roots. Everyone looked up at the roof now gone, with mouths wide open, as birds began to fly into the room. Moments later, everyone looked at the Screaming Pencils' bucket, and saw that it only made a "poof"-type noise, as a little amount of smoke came out of it. The Screaming Pencils' eyed each other, as Chris immediately announced, "Samantha and the Killer Pens win!!!" The Killer Pens began cheering as Samantha tried to get into the camera's view, "Don't forget Jeffrey!!" "Riiiiiight, can't forget about Jeffrey," Chris said, shooing Samantha from the camera. "Pencils!! Meet me at the Detention Hall Ceremony to vote someone out!!" Chris grabbed the Killer Pens' orange chemical, revealing the Hall Pass under it, drank some of the chemical, gave the Hall Pass to Ariel, and walked off-screen, "Mmmm, good Orange Juice." "Is this really fair?" Ariel said. Walking off screen with the orange juice, Chris said, "I'm the host, I can make it fair!" "ORANGE?!.... JUICE!?" Webby said, shocked. "What the orange?!" Johnathan looked at the chemical. Zach grabbed the Screaming Pencils' orange chemical, and drank some, "MAN! That is some good OJ!" "OJ!? Where is he?!" Samantha yelled out. "Not him!" Tammi corrected her, "Orange juice, orange juuuuuuuuuice!" Ryan's head began to pound. He yanked the orange chemical from Zach's hands, "I swear, if someone says 'orange' one more time, I'll go crazy!" He threw the chemical out and it hit the floor. Even though it was orange juice, an automated Chris came on the megaphone chanting, "Code: Orange! Code: Orange!  Code: Orange!" Ryan went ballistic and began attacking the megaphone, trying to destroy it.

The scene then cut to the Screaming Pencils at the Detention Hall Ceremony, already had their votes locked in. "Remember!" Chris said. "If you get a Golden A+, it means you're safe, and we like you; however, if you don't, you will be forced to take the Walk of Shame, leave the Detention Hall Classroom, and never come back to this school!!" The camera panned over the Screaming Pencils, all looking a bit scared. "Golden A+'s to.....," Chris started, "Jeff!..... Ariel!..... Zach!..... and Webby!" Chris threw the Golden A+'s to the few respectively. "Tammi, Katherine, this is the final A+ of the evening," Chris said. The camera looked over to a confident Tammi and a less-than confident Katherine. "And, it goes to.............................. Tammi!!!" Tammi caught the Golden A+, then smiled at Katherine, mockingly. Jeff and Katherine both rose up, "What!?" "Why did you guys vote her off?!" Jeff demanded to know. "Duh... She cost us the game!" Tammi said. "Plus, she's a little crazy! Bad influence for our team.  You'll be okay.  You understand," Tammi said to the both of them. "I, even, didn't see that one coming," Chris said to the team, "but, it's done now!" "Wait!!" Jeff said to Chris. He ran up to Katherine and gave her a passionate kiss, which lasted for about 20 seconds. After he finally finished, Katherine looked into his eyes lovingly, as they both said, in unison, "I'll never forget you..." Katherine walked backwards, out of the room, staring at Jeff as much as she could, trying to fight back tears. She blew him a kiss as she left the premises. Chris ran up to Jeff and put his arm around him, "And, we're down to our Final Ten!! Will Jeff kill Tammi before the season is over?  Will Tammi grow a heart for anyone else other than herself!?  Will Zach get less weird next episode?!  None of these questions will be answered, but be sure to tune in to the next dramatic episode of Total..... Drama...... 101!!!!" At that point, Jeff began sobbing as the camera faded to black.

Chapter Twelve: Ryan's Kitchen
Chris walked into the camera's view, in front of the school and began his speech, "Last time, on Total Drama 101: We had some fun with chemicals in Chemistry class! It was awesome!  We learned that Ariel & Ryan.... really shouldn't be near each other at any time, that Jeff & Katherine.... really needs to stop with their cheesy romance, and that Tammi...... really needs to store some of 'Nalydenial' in a few containers.  I mean, come... on!  They're like a nerdy Duncan and Courtney, I mean, seriously!  Meanwhile, teams chose Katherine and Samantha to participate in the chemical challenge:  creating the biggest explosion!!" Chris laughed, and continued, "Unfortunately for the Pencils, the Pens' winning streak continued as they chalked up win number three, causing the Screaming Pencils to participate in a vote-off for the record-books! The Pencil-necks actually ousted Katherine!  Come on, guys, she only made one mistake. Too bad, it cost her her life on this show." Chris began thinking, "Hmm... Oh, well! Find out who gets tonight's boot this week on Total.... Drama.... 1-0-1!!"

After the theme song ended, the final ten schoolmates were all sitting together in the foyer of the mansion near the front door.

Ariel: The Final Ten, dude!! I am so psyched! Won't be long now. See, I told you nice guys can get far! (smiles) This season could be mine! (smiles more) Jeff: (sits in the confessional for about 3 seconds with no comment) Meh... Johnathan: (talking about himself) Wow, little Johnathan's actually made it to the Final Ten. Of course, it's obvious an angel like me would come this far. Ryan: (putting a book down he was looking at) Duh!! Final Ten? (talking to the viewer) I'm sure all of you out there have enough brains to figure out it was clear that I would get this far and go even further beyond! (cackles) These idiots don't know how to play this game, no one does.... I. Do. Samantha: (petting herself) Samantha made it to the Final Ten. Samantha thought it was easy. Samantha is in an alliance with Ryan. Samantha thinks it won't be long until she wins. Samantha hopes she wins. Samantha wants a steak right now. Samantha begins imagining about how juicy the steak should be. Saman-- (confessional cut off) Stefani: (now in a "happy" mood this episode, not necessarily "loopy") This is great! The Final Ten! I'm sure I'll be in the Finals. People like me here. I mean, (scoffs) what's not to like!? Jordan, I'm comin' home with the big bucks, baby! Tammi: (finishing with checking her nails) The prize money awaits and beckons for me, Tammi, the future winner of this show. People think that since I'm the most popular person at my school, I'm gonna donate the money to it if-- (stops self) Oh, excuse me....... when I win. (smacks lips) They have another thing coming. Terry: Whoo-hoo!! The Final Ten!! Yes, baby, yes! I'm not even nervous right now! I'm kinda positive! This game could be mine... I'm in an awesome alliance with the awesome Ryan and everything's looking up right now! I'm so psyched! Final Ten, then the Final Nine, then Eight, and Seven, then Six, and Five, and-- Oh, whatever, I'm getting to the Finale! Webby: The Final Ten... Wow... After weeks of cellphone robbing, Spanish speaking, and the number '8008', (snickers) I am happy that I made it here. If I win, that'll be great; I need a cellphone. So, I hope I continue on and make it in and out through these next few episodes. I'm a little scared right now. I saw Ryan earlier today, and, I swear, he looked like Tom the Giant Chicken. What does he put on his face and body? Zach: The Final Ten! This is amazing! I kinda knew it would happen, but still.... I gotta act surprised. I feel like jumping!! Kinda like a puma. Did you know they're one of the highest jumping mammals of the world!? They're so cool. But, other than that, I'm amazed right now! Alyssa, I'm winning it for both of us! (blows a kiss to the camera, but his hand hits the camera, breaking it) Oops. Uhhh.... (confessional cut off)

"So," Ariel said. "Soooo," Johnathan said, back. Everyone was still sitting in the foyer, as an awkward silence enters the air. Webby looked around and saw Tammi, once again, toying with her cell phone. "Do you ever put that cell phone up?" Webby asked, playfully. "Do you ever stop talking?" Tammi said back. Webby looked at her, "I was just kidding. Geez, you're such a 'Courtney'." Tammi gasped, "I am not!!" She, then, looked over to everyone else, "Guys, am I a 'Courtney'-type person!?" The camera panned over to everyone else. Jeff was looking down (because of Katherine) and didn't care; Ariel & Zach were looking at each other, trying to think of what to say; Ryan was shaking his head 'yes' like there was no tomorrow; Terry was staring at Stefani, who was waving at Terry; Samantha was looking up in the sky, trying to ignore the question; and Johnathan was only staring at Tammi, scared to answer. Tammi looked at all of them, and groaned at the silence.

Webby: See?? Total. Courtney. (laughs) Ah, I crack myself up.

"Well, if I'm a Courtney," Tammi started, "then Jeff's a....... Geoff." A rimshot was heard. "Can somebody say... 'corny comeback'?" Ryan scoffed at her. "Shut it... Uhh... Heather!" Tammi shakily said. "At least Heather's not crazy like somebody I could compare Courtney to right now," Ryan said, smiling. Tammi scoffed, as usual, and stayed quiet. "You're totally a Courtney," Ryan continued, "And, Nalyd's your little Duncan." Tammi's eyes widened, as Ryan had hit a nerve. Tammi yelled, "I LOVE NALYD, what's so hard to understand about-- DON'T! DON'T!  I DON'T LOVE HIM!  Wha--  Wha-wha--" "Go on," Ryan said, smirking. Tammi balled her fist up, but kept her cool, and sat back down, pouting.

Ryan: They look so great together. They should name their kids "Maury" and "Jerry"! Wouldn't that be so cute? (smiles evilly and laughs)

The camera panned over to Johnathan, looking at Jeff. "Jeff?" Johnathan asked. Jeff, still angry and looking down at the ground, said nothing. "Are you going to say anything, man?" Johnathan said, trying to get his attention. The camera went back over to Jeff, still lifeless.

Jeff: Dudes, it's all that stupid Tammi's fault for getting my girl out of the game! I'mma party dude, I don't usually get angry. Hmm, I wonder.... (confessional cut off)

The camera went back over to Ariel, who tried to get up, but fell as a nearby eruption/explosion was heard. "Again!?" Tammi said. At that point, the smoke alarm went off. "Ooh, we're doing Chemistry again?!" Samantha asked. As Samantha kept smiling over what wouldn't be happening, the others ran out of the mansion into the school to see what was going on. Stefani, in front, opened the school doors to see a huge note for the schoolmates on the ground. Stefani read it aloud, "Report to Room 110 for your next challenge in Home Economics." Samantha hiccuped, "Didn't we already do food?" "That was lunch, sweetie, this is something else," Ryan said, trying to keep Samantha on his good side. "Ohhhhh," she replied.

The scene cut to the Final Ten in front of Chris in the Home Economics room, surrounded by many food items and food utensils. "Welcome, my students!" Chris said. "Ready for today's challenge?" Terry cheered, "Of course!!" Ryan gave him a small look, but ignored him and kept listening. Chris took out a piece of paper and waved his hand to his left side (right side, to the schoolmates), "Okay, Screaming Pencils, when I call your name, go stand over there: Tammi." "Here!" Tammi said, walking over. "Ariel!" Chris announced. "Present," Ariel said, as he walked over to Tammi. "Jeff," Chris continued. Jeff only mumbled something and went over to join the Pencils. "Zach," Chris called Zach. Zach said "here", and went over to join. Chris finished, "And, finally, Webby." "Presente!" Webby said, cart-wheeling over to Tammi and the other Pencils. "Now, Kill--" Chris tried to start. "We're all here, where do we go?" Ryan said, seemingly annoyed. Chris eyed him and mumbled, ".... Never have any fun with you." "Go stand over there," Chris said, pointing to his right. He then put check marks everywhere on the paper, "No one's absent! Let's get started."

Tammi: Making this place into a real school is very stupid. Can you hear me, Chris?? Very..... Stupid.

"You guys remember way back in Season One where we had that huge team cook-off, and I was super-hot, and Duncan started getting on Courtney's nerves, and I was super-hot, and Harold kept getting picked on, and I was super-hot, and Heather got frozen, and I was super-hot, and Beth got voted out, and I was super-hot??" Chris asked, smiling. "I only remember about half of that," Johnathan said, bringing Chris's head down. Chris sighed, "Anyway, we're going to try and re-do that challenge this week, only the thing is... you only have to prepare one entrée dish! You can choose whatever dish you want, but you better hope I like it, because I'm judging again!" Chris laughed, "Any questions?!" Ariel raised his hand. "Yes, Ariel?" Chris asked. "Exactly what dish do you like?" Ariel asked back. Tammi smacked her head. "I can't tell you that, little chef. Anything goes, but it just better be good," Chris replied.

Tammi: He's a decent player, he's got his 'Lindsiot' moments, he's.... he's.... he's Ariel. Do I really want this boy in my alliance? I need someone that can help me... (pause) ... Get to the Finals.

"Okay, if there's nothing else," Chris started, taking out a whistle and blowing it, "Commence cooking!!"

The camera switched scenes to Johnathan, Samantha, Stefani, and Terry arguing over which dish they should prepare for Chris. It then panned over to Ryan's chest. The camera zoomed out to show Ryan, in a chef's outfit, holding a long, wooden spoon. "Okay, class!" Ryan said to the Killer Pens, "Stop your bickering!! Now.... As head chef, I--" "Wait, how come you're he--" Johnathan started but was cut off. Ryan banged the wooden spoon on a counter, "No talking while the head chef is talking!!" Samantha and Terry saluted Ryan (as they were in his alliance) while Johnathan and Stefani looked at each other, and gave in. "We're making spaghetti. Just spaghetti, that is," Ryan told his team. "But, what about--" Stefani was interrupted. Ryan banged the spoon on Stefani's head, this time, "Hup, hup, hup! It's spaghetti, and nothing but!" The remaining Killer Pens looked at each other and all sighed.

Terry: Ryan's a good person, but I really think he's cruisin' for a bruisin'. Someone's going to get him for this. (frowns) Not me, of course, but.... someone probably will. I'm scared for him.

Over at the Screaming Pencils' table, everyone was discussing. "Should we make pancakes?" Ariel asked. Tammi brushed up against Ariel, "What a great idea, Ariel." Tammi smiled and winked at him. Ariel looked at her, a tad creeped out, "Uhh.... Thank you?"

Tammi: Man, I'm about to get him good!

"I think we should make a pie!" Webby said. He began stepping up to the Screaming Pencils' part of the kitchen, but Jeff put his arm in front of him and stopped Webby. "No," Jeff said, sounding like a serious superhero, "I've got this one. You 4 sit down, I'll handle this." "He seems serious," Zach said. Tammi raised an eyebrow and looked at him, "What do you plan on--" Jeff turned around and said in a sinister voice, "Dudette. I.  Got.  This." Tammi's eyes widened again. She sat down, nearly tripping over a chair, because of how Jeff just responded to her. The camera zoomed in on Jeff, as he whispered, "This is for Katherine." Jeff ran into the kitchen at super-speed, a speed fast enough where the other 4 Pencils could hardly see him. "How's he going that fast!?" Webby asked out loud. Tammi, unimpressed, answered him, "It's the producers, probably. They're finding some way to defy the Laws of Physics by speeding him up.  He's not that good of a chef."

The other Pencils watched in awe at Jeff's speed, as the camera panned over to the Pens, who were also watching, with their mouths wide open. Ryan snapped them back into reality by banging his spoon on a table. "Get to work!!!" Ryan said. "Samantha, you're handling the noodles. Terry, you find some sauce somewhere.  Johnathan, go get some meatballs.  And, Stefani, go get the plates and silverware.  I'm winning this challenge!" "You are?" Samantha asked. Ryan gasped, ran over to Samantha and Terry, and side-hugged both of them. "You know I meant we, sillies," he said to them and his team. "Now, get to work!!" he yelled in their ears.

Stefani: Do a little cooking, get yelled at by a feminine rat, win a challenge or two, none of it's gonna get me down. I'm in a pretty happy place right now. (smiles)

The camera switched scenes to the Screaming Pencils, still watching Jeff go as fast as lightning with his cooking. Tammi got an evil look in her eye as she gleamed at Ariel. "Ariel, can I speak with you?" Tammi said, smiling. "Sure!" "Thanks! Listen... I really don't want to see you get eliminated.  It'll break my heart.  You're a great person, and, if I don't win, you ''definitely deserve to." "Awww, thanks, Tammi!" "No problem. And, I was thinking... A way to keep you alive in this game would be... to put you in an alliance with me so you don't get voted off.  We can pick everyone off one-by-one and I'll take you and the rest of my alliance to the Finals!  Heck, I may even throw the final challenge for you.  You're so nice, you really need to win." "You say the nicest things." Ariel thought for a few seconds and reluctantly asked, "Can I join your alliance!?" Tammi cast an evil grin, "Oh, of... course... you.... can." Ariel clapped his hands and cheered silently.

Later on, on the Killer Pens' table, Samantha was finished with preparing the spaghetti noodles, Terry was ready to add his special bottled sauce, Stefani had the silverware and plates ready, and Johnathan was ready with his meatballs to add. Ryan sighed, "Now, put it all together, you guys." "Got it!" Johnathan said. He was cut off by Chris, though, who came over to check on the two teams. He only looked for a few seconds, then, took out another coveted Hall Pass, made it into an airplane, and threw it upward. After throwing it, he yelled, "Incoming!!!!" Everyone (except for Jeff) looked up to see the Hall Pass airplane flying up to the ceiling and coming back down. At that point, Everyone began running around frantically, trying to get the Hall Pass. Johnathan, carrying his meatballs for the Killer Pens' spaghetti dish, ran up to get the pass, but, unfortunately, spilled a few of his meatballs on the floor. This caused everyone to slip and slide around the floor of the Home Economics room. Johnathan slipped on the meatballs and smacked into Terry, who was holding his bottle of sauce. The collision caused Terry to squeeze the bottle, making his spaghetti sauce go everywhere. A few seconds after, everyone was covered in Terry's sauce and bumped into each other over not being able to see. The Hall Pass then landed on Samantha's sauce-covered head.

"Awe, for me?!" Samantha said. She grabbed the Hall Pass, got up and unfolded it. Ryan looked up at her, as an evil grin came upon his face. At that point, Chris blew his airhorn. "Time's up!!" Chris announced. "Oh, my." Chris looked at everyone (but Jeff) covered in sauce. "I'm not even going to ask. You guys ready with your dishes?!" Webby got up, "But, none of us are ready!" Jeff finally stopped going at super-speed and stopped in his tracks with a steamy, plump, and juicy steak on a plate in his hands. "The Pencils are done!" Jeff said, now in his usual happy-go-lucky voice. Chris' mouth began watering, "Ohhhhh, that looks so good!!" He then looked to the Pens' table to see no dish prepared, "Killer Pens, do you not have a dish prepared?" Terry got up and looked over to the Pens' area with unfinished spaghetti on it, "Almost?" The Killer Pens all got up and tried to run over and finish their dish, but Johnathan tripped on another meatball, causing him to run into Stefani, who fell onto Samantha, who fell onto Terry, who trampled and fell on Ryan, who tried to get the finished spaghetti noodles. When falling, he could only get the spaghetti and hold onto it for a few seconds, as they fell out of his hands, causing the noodles to impact Chris in the face. The Killer Pens gasped. "Oops," Johnathan spoke out. "Yeah, you better think 'oops'!!" Ryan said, growling.

Chris tasted the spaghetti noodles (without the sauce or meatballs or anything), "Mmmm.... Too bland." Ryan ducked his head in shame as Chris announced, "They're worthy of a '2'. A score of 2 out of 10, that is." "UGH!!!" Ryan groaned. "This is not my fault!!" "Screaming Pencils? Can you save my tongue?!" Chris asked, sarcastically. The Screaming Pencils were all smiling as Jeff slowly walked over to Chris to give him their steak. "I hope you enjoy, dude," Jeff said. Chris took a small bite out of the steak, and became bug-eyed, "I've tasted a piece of Heaven!! With a score of 10 kerjillion out of 10, Jeff and the Screaming Pencils win invincibility!  Killer Pens, for the first time, in a while, I'll see you at the Detention Hall Ceremony!"

Ryan: .......... (bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep)-- (confessional cut off)

At the Detention Hall Ceremony, the 5 Killer Pens locked their votes in. "5 shall soon become 4 in tonight's elimination ceremony! I have the person that's about to be eliminated.... not much of a shocker.  Stefani and Terry!  You two are safe!" Chris announced, throwing Stefani and Terry their Golden A+'s. "Samantha! So are you!" Chris said. Two spotlights then shined on Ryan and Johnathan. "Who will it be!?" Chris said. "Who's soufflé will stay risen, and who's will be crushed with their elimination!? The final Golden A+ goes to.......................... Johnathan!!  Ryan, you're done like dinner!" Ryan was still sitting in his chair. "Ryan?! Hello?  You were just voted out!  Get outta here!" Stefani said, as Johnathan caught his Golden A+. Ryan smiled and said, "Chris? Did you forget about this?" Ryan flashed Samantha's Hall Pass in Chris' face, now in his possession. "Did Samantha give that to you?" Chris asked. Ryan looked back at Samantha, "She suuuuuuure did." "Well," Chris began. "In that case, all votes again Ryan are terminated. And since everyone voted for Ryan except for Ryan, only his vote counts." Chris looked over at Ryan. "Wait, wait, everyone voted me off!?" Ryan said, looking at Samantha and Terry. "You guys are gonna get it!! Johnathan, you're getting it now because I voted you off, little 'angel'!" Johnathan gasped as Ryan came over as jacked his Golden A+. "Well, rules are rules." Chris said. "Johnathan, you've been eliminated!" Johnathan got up, "That's so not right!" He proceeded down and out the D-Hall room and walked the Walk of Shame.

Chris watched as Johnathan left the school premises, "Well, that will do it for Johnathan, the meatball angel. Who will be cast-off next?  Will Ryan actually end up winning this season?!  Will Tammi stop thinking about Nalyd every waking moment!?!" "HEY!" Tammi faintly said, off-screen. "All the questions will be answered.............. never!" Chris laughed, "Just kidding, but tune in for the next episode of Total... Drama.... 1-0-1!!" Chris signed off the show and the camera faded out to black.

Chapter Thirteen: Gym II - Hatchet's Revenge
The camera faded in again, with Chris in his usual spot, "Last time on Total Drama 1-0-1... it was counterpart time!! We learned that Ryan is a true, evil witch... another name being 'Heather'.  Tammi's a definite 'Courtney'....... shock-er.  Jeff's 'Geoff'....... BIGGER shock-er.  Zach seems to be a less dorky 'Harold', which is still pretty bad.  Webby's a skinnier 'Owen', and a lot more!!  After that, we got into the next class subject, home economics!  We got so many jeers and emails from fans that I ripped last week's challenge off from our first season, but they never thought of something:  I don't care!  Anyway, if you thought Ryan was a demon before, you're gonna think he was a devil when seeing last week's challenge!  He went straight dictator on them!  Anyway, of course, his leadership was his downfall as Jeff, our quiet and upset chef, won the challenge for the Screaming Pencils. Just when things were looking down for the Killer Pens at the Detention Hall Ceremony, he revealed that he too-- I mean.... got Samantha to give him her Hall Pass. At that point, all votes for Ryan were terminated. I, then, made a small comedy error, saying that everyone, including Ryan's alliance, voted for him, meaning only Ryan's vote counted. Ryan revealed that he voted for Johnathan, thinking his whole alliance did, too. Either way, Johnathan was voted out! Who's getting the boot next?! Does Ryan trust his alliance anymore!? Find out now on Total.... Drama.... 1-0-1!!"

After the theme song, the scene faded in to see Samantha and Terry, with their heads down, sitting on Ryan's Master Bedroom bed, while Ryan paced in front of them.

Terry: Ryan's called both me and Samantha into his room to have an alliance meeting. (shudders) I can't believe he found me and Samantha out. You think he'll be mad? (looks around, shaking)

"You betrayed me," Ryan said, passing them. Samantha made a big gulping sound. Ryan continued, "You backstabbed me." Terry then gulped. "And, you tried to vote me off," Ryan said, in an angered voice. Both Samantha and Terry gulped at this. Ryan stopped, in the center of the two, "What do you cows have to say for yourselves!?" Terry and Samantha looked at each other. "We're sorry!!" Samantha and Terry said together to Ryan. Ryan's voice turned sinister, "You both give me one reason why I shouldn't kick you out of the alliance and boot your butts out the next chance I get!" Samantha looked up, as her eyes met with Ryan's, "You took my Hall Pass last week. You would be gone if that didn't happen." Ryan, realizing that was a sufficient reason, yelled at Samantha, "Get outta here!!" Samantha then turned her crazy switch on and flipped out of Ryan's Master Bedroom, a bit scared. "Then, there's you," Ryan said. He got into his face and almost yelled. Terry immediately started shaking. Ryan calmed himself, remembering that he needed Terry as an ally. He put his hand on Terry's arm. "You know me," Ryan told him. "Yeah, you're Ryan," Terry responded, still a little scared of what Ryan may do. Ryan looked at him, "Calm down, I'm not going to do anything--"

Ryan: (with a balled-up fist, shaking it) ......... Yet!

"Why would you do this, man? I haven't done anything that bad to you," Ryan lied. "I guess not, I don't know what I was thinking," Terry said, shaking his head, trying to protect himself. Ryan noticed the fear Terry was giving off and tried to reassure him. "You know, I want you and Sam to be in the Finals with me, but you've gotta trust me. I hope this little screw-up doesn't happen again," Ryan tells him. Terry's head came up. He looked at Ryan, who was giving him a smile, but a fake one. "Now, you can go on back to your room," Ryan told him. Terry immediately rose and ran out of Ryan's room.

Ryan: It's simple. 1. Start an alliance. 2. Find others to join the alliance. Now, we're up to 3, boys and girls, gaining trust. And, that's exactly what I just did with Tony.... Uhh, I meant Terry! Terry... is what I meant. And, SaMANtha's such an idiot, anybody can manipulate her. This is all too easy.

The camera went downstairs and entered Jeff's room. Jeff was seen, staring into a picture. The camera zoomed in on him to see that the picture was of Katherine. Jeff got up and began walking around, "Man, this is a serious bummer, dude. I... I... I don't know why that Tammi--"  At that point, banging was heard on the other side on one of Jeff's walls. "Keep it down about me in there!" Tammi yelled out. She beat on the wall a little more, "You'll see your little girlfriend again! I'm trying to have peace in here!!" "Well, you're not doing a very coolio job, dude!! You're yelling!" Jeff said on the other side of Tammi's wall.

Tammi: I'm in my room, trying to keep peace and think about what I need to do in this stupid game. I heard from Johnathan before he left that Ryan's alliance only consists of him, Samantha, and Terry. Now that I have Ariel in my beautiful alliance, we have three people, too. Ariel, Zach, and myself. (faintly laughs) We're neck-and-neck. Won't be long until the game is actually mine.

The camera went back into Tammi's room, who was in a meditative position. As she was trying to find her peace, a huge whistle was blown from the schoolgrounds in front of her. "UGH!! Can't we get some quiet time in here!?" Tammi screeched. Webby, leaving his room behind Tammi commented under his breath, "Not if you don't take that megaphone out of your mouth." Webby closed his eyes and snickered, not knowing that Tammi looked behind her to see that he was the one that said it.

The Final Nine met Chris outside, behind the school. Ryan, sweating, began complaining, "Ughhh, can we go inside!? It's a thousand degrees out here!" "Nahhh, today's challenge is going to be outside.... and in!" Chris exclaimed, smiling. The Final Nine all groaned. Chris looked at them, "Enough of the chitty-chitty bang bang! I get paid if you guys hear the challenge or not, so I hope you're listening!  Today's subject, class?  It's R.O.T.C.!!" Zach immediately gasped, "Awesome, dude!! I'm in ROTC in my real school!" "Then, you may do pretty well at this," Chris told Zach. "Whatever," Stefani said in a monotone voice. Ariel scratched his head, "R.O.-- whaa?" Chris sighed, "'R.O.T.C.' stands for Reserve Officers' Training Corps." "Meaning?" Ryan asked. Chris waved his hand to the obstacle course in front of them. "Boot camp!!" Chris squealed. Ryan moaned, "It's too hot for this crap!" Sarcastically, Chris answered him, "Oh, yeah, Ryan, I realllllllly care. Now listen up!  You're all going to compete in a basic boot camp challenge.  We--" "Didn't we already do this before?" Webby asked. "Webby...," Chris reprimanded him, "now, it's pretty simple. Complete the boot camp exercises; first one back wins invincibility!" "That is so not fair!" Tammi snarled at Chris. "We have more people to get through the boot camp than they do!! They have an advantage!" "Oh, did I not mention that I'm bustin' up the teams this episode!?!" Chris said, as dramatic filler music played. Terry gasped, "No way! We can't be separated!!" Terry clinged onto Ryan, who gasped. Ryan literally shook him off, as Terry fell to the ground. Ryan began to smile at Chris, "So, no more teams now!?" "Nada!" Chris said back.

Ryan: This is exactly what I needed! No more of these losers holding me back! Now, I'm winning for sure!

"Now, as I was saying, it's R.O.T.C. day, and we've got a boo--" Chris was interrupted by Chef Hatchet, who was coming to Chris' location, wearing an army uniform and rolling three very tall boxes with him.

(Chef's entrance start) Chef: (marching) I don't know what I've been told!! Voices from the Boxes: (being rolled in) I don't know what I've been told!! Chef: 3 contestants, back to the show! Voices: 3 contestants, back to the show! Chef: (taking one of the Boxes off to show Lilie) Sound off! Lilie: I'm back! Chef: (taking the second Box off, showing Dedrek) Sound off! Dedrek: Me, too! Chef, Lilie, and Dedrek: Sound off, "I'm back, me too". (takes third box off to reveal Nalyd) Lilie, Dedrek, and Nalyd: (all together) We're back!! (Chef's entrance end)

Tammi looked over to see Nalyd and nearly fainted, Lilie looked over and eyed Webby, to which Webby took a huge gulp. Dedrek eyed all of the 'used-to-be' Killer Pens. Chris stares at Chef and the kids, "Well, guess it's a good time to tell you that we have 3 people coming back to the competition!" Tammi spoke out, "Uh-uh! No way! They were booted out of this game, fair and square!" "When the heck have you known me to be fair, Barbie?" Chris said. "It's Tammi," Tammi corrected. "Hammy?" "TAMMI!" "Diana. Now, we chose to bring these 3 gentlemen back to the show for certain reasons." "Which would be?" Webby asked. Chris looked at Webby, "Well, since you asked ever-so-nicely, dude... The reasons are: 1. 'Not', 2. 'Gonna', 3. 'Tell', and the most important one 4. 'Ya'!" Jeff scratched his head, "Could you repeat #2?" Stefani smacked her head. "Now," Chris continued, "since Nalyd, Dedrek, and Lilie just returned to the competition, they will be automatically invincible for this episode." Lilie, Dedrek, and Nalyd cheered from afar. "Aw, that's no fair!" Zach complained. Chris thumped Zach's nose, "Do you really want me to go through that again? I just finished with Randi!" Zach shook his head 'no'. "Now, here's how it's gon--" Chris was interrupted by a nearby intern. The intern walked on-screen and gave Chris a card. At that point, a bird dive-bombed the intern and began pecking at him, chasing him off-screen. Chris mumbled something out loud, "Hmm.... It appears I've been summoned for Jury duty." Webby chuckled, "He said 'duty'." Chris smacked his head. "Ugh... If you guys take anything from today, it should be this: Never ever take your dad's car and total it," Chris then walked off screen without explaining anything. The Final Nine stared into space, not knowing what to do. Nalyd, Lilie, and Dedrek, now turning it back into the Final Twelve, looked at Chef. An off-screen intern whispered, "Chef! Take over!!!" "Why I gotta do it? I'm busy!" Chef lied. He grumbled and went up in front of all of the schoolmates. "Rich girl! French Boy!  Richard!" Chef yelled at Lilie, Dedrek, and Nalyd, "Over here!" Chef pointed to his side. The three of them walked over to Chef Hatchet, facing the remaining schoolmates.

"Listen up!!" Chef yelled, "...'cuz I'm only sayin' it once! It's ROTC day, which means boot camp!!  You must do the following:" "Climb that 10 foot wall, using that rope; crawl under that barbed wire... and it does sting; run through that 30 foot long pile of thick mud; run into the school, straight to the ROTC room and hit the corresponding buzzer to what place you come in! There's a buzzer for 1st place, 2nd place, 3rd place, 4th place, yadda-yadda-yadda!  First place gets that invi-- invinnie-- invita-- in--" "Invincibility?" Terry said. Chef got within millimeters of Terry's face and yelled, "DID I ASK YOU TO CORRECT ME?!?!" Terry saluted, "Sir, no, sir!" nearly wetting his pants in the process. Chef saluted back. "First place wins and gets... that "I" word. Second place gets the Hall Pass.  Everyone else, except for Rich Girl and her friends over here, will be up for elimination!" Everyone began gasping.

Terry: Sue a guy for helping, geez.

"Close them holes!!" Chef Hatchet said. Everyone immediately closed their mouths. As Ariel was closing his, a fly trapped itself inside his mouth. Ariel began freaking out and fell down, trying to keep his mouth close but also trying to find a way to get the fly out. "Get up, son!!" Chef Hatchet said. Ariel got up and coughed, as the fly flew out. Chef ignored Ariel and began talking to the three returners, "You three! Before Chris left for his car-thing, he said that y'all aren't competing because of legal blah-blah-blah crap, so, as long as you don't say anything, you're not competing and you get auto-invincibility!" "This is so crappin' ridiculous," Ryan muttered to himself. Chef immediately turned back around and pointed to Ryan, "You!! Demon!!  Come closer, what you say?!" "I said," Ryan said, literally in his face, "This. Is. Crappin'. Ridi-" Ryan was stopped as Chef Hatchet grabbed him and literally threw Ryan back into the crowd of the competitors. "UGH!" Ryan scoffed. Chef immediately blew an airhorn without any warning. Everyone looked at each other, not knowing what to do. "That means 'go', maggots! GO!!" Chef yelled, telling them to start the challenge. Everyone but the returnees, Ryan, and Stefani screamed and rocketed off. Ryan was seen sitting down and Stefani was still standing in her same spot. "Whatever," Stefani said, walking into the challenge.

Ariel and Terry took the lead, with Zach in the next position, followed by Jeff, then Samantha, then Tammi, then Webby, then Stefani, who was still walking. Ariel and Terry made it to the wall climb first, seeing that there was only one rope. Ariel took the rope, but then saw Terry right behind him. "Let's do this!" Terry yelled. "Oh, you go first," Ariel said, smiling. "Thanks!" Terry said, quickly climbing up the rope and wall. Tammi, from behind, yelled, "Ariel, no!! You gotta get up there!"

Ariel: Ohhhhh, I can't help but help others. I'm a nice guy. Curse you, nice genes! (sniffle)

"Oh, I will!" Ariel said, "Later." Zach came up behind Terry and climbed up the wall, thanks to Ariel giving up his spot. "Ariel, get up there," Tammi said. Jeff came approaching, but Ariel went first, with him and Jeff neck-in-neck to the next part of the challenge.

Later, over at the starting line, Ryan was still sitting down, relaxing. Chef Hatchet turned around again to see him there. Chef Hatchet mini-blew the airhorn a few times. Ryan looked up, "Uhh... Do you mind?! I'm trying to rest here." "I blew this airhorn, and that means you 'go'!" Chef screamed out. Ryan assured him, smiling, "Oh, no, no, no. See, you can't make me do anything, prison warden." Chef immediately began growling.

The scene then switched to the next part of the challenge. The positions have changed as everyone made it to the barbed wire part of the challenge.

Stefani finished walking up and down the wall, and made it to the barbed wire crawl. Jeff, however, was the first person to reach the crawl, and immediately dove under the barbed wire, without getting shocked. "Come back here, lover boy!" Zach said, throwing himself under the barbed wire. Webby passed Terry on the run to the barbed wire, closing his eyes, and sticking his tongue out at Terry. Unfortunately, Webby, still having his eyes closed, tripped over the barbed wire crawlspace, and fell on top of it, getting shocked. Tammi and Terry both ran up past Webby as got into the crawlspace. "Let me go first, troll!" Tammi yelled at Terry, passing him in the crawlspace. Terry immediately passed Tammi, "No way!!" They kept arguing and passing each other every so often, passing Webby on top of them in the process. "Hello!! Guy trapped in wire over hereeeeeeeeee!" Webby yelled, as Tammi & Terry passed him. Ariel & Samantha, at around the same time, encountered the barbed wire crawlspace. Ariel stopped and, again, allowed someone to pass him, "After you, Samantha." "Whoo, whoo!!" Samantha said, crawling through the barbed wire. Due to her craziness and hyperactivity, she caught up with Tammi and Terry and eventually passed them and the stuck Webby, getting out of the crawlspace. Tammi stopped, making it where Terry could pass her, and looked back at Ariel. "Come on, Ariel! You can do it!" Tammi lied, trying to give him positive reinforcement. Ariel looked behind him to see Stefani still walking, coming up to the barbed wire. Turned around, he muttered, "Nah, you go ahead. I think I see Stefani coming up!" Tammi smacked her head and continued going, trying to catch Terry, who had advanced to the third part of the challenge.

The scene switched back to Ryan with Chef Hatchet, playing Rock, Paper, Scissors out of boredom. "One, two, three, shoot!!" Ryan said. Chef revealed 'rock' and Ryan revealed 'paper'. "Paper covers rooooooock!" Ryan said, mockingly. Chef growled, "What!? Skippin' stones are stronger that paper!" "Yeah, yeah, but what covers the skipping stones?! Come on, say it with me...," Ryan said in a smart-aleck way. "Paaaaaaaaaa-perrrrrrrr," Ryan said with Chef Hatchet slowly. Chef snarled at how Ryan was making fun of him and literally punched him off-screen.

By the time the majority of the schoolmates got to the 3rd part of the challenge, walking through the mud, the positions had changed again.

At that point, Jeff & Zach were slap-fighting in attempts to get in the lead for the mud run. They end up closing their eyes, and, unfortunately ended up falling headfirst into the mud. Samantha then made it to the mud run. Right before she dove in to run through, Jeff & Zach rose up from the mud, covered in it. "Omigosh!!" Samantha said. She immediately jumped onto Zach's shoulders, and kicked his back, "Ride 'em, cowboy!!" Zach immediately began running towards the 4th leg of the challenge, carrying Samantha. Tammi and Terry, again, made it to the 3rd leg of the challenge at about the same time. Jeff was still there. Tammi looked at Jeff, then looked at what Samantha and Zach were doing. Terry was just about to leap in when Tammi executed a low roundhouse kick, throwing Terry off-balance. Terry immediately lost his balance and fell headfirst into the mud. Tammi jumped onto Jeff's shoulders and forcibly kick his back, causing him to cough, "Giddyup, if you know what's good for ya!" Jeff immediately started moving with no questions and began catching up with Zach and Samantha. "Guys!!" Terry said, coughing and puking up mud and vomit. "Wait up!" he said, walking through the mud.

Tammi: Man, that Samantha's got skill. She's in the lead!! How can I catch her?! Hmm, I wonder.... (begins to think; a lightbulb pops up on top of her head; Tammi takes the lightbulb and throws it off-screen) Uh-uh! It's too hot out here already! I don't need a piece of yellow glass shining on me, making me sweat my makeup off! (evil grin over what she was thinking of)

Around this time, Stefani, at her own pace, literally walked past the barbed wire crawlspace and made it up to the mud run in seconds. "Whatever," she told herself. "Hey, wait for me!!" Ariel said to Stefani. Stefani turned around and yelled, "Whateverrrrrr!!!" She dove into the mud run. Over back at the barbed wire, Ariel was actually going through it. "Can you help a bro out........ bro?" Webby said, sincerely. Webby was tangled over the net and Ariel was trying to complete the challenge under the net. Ariel untangled Webby from the barbed wire, entangling himself. "Thanks, man!!" Webby skipped along, not looking back at Webby. "Uhhh, Webby?" Ariel said, "Can you help me out?" he yelled out to no avail. Webby had already went up to the mud run.

At the next scene change, the positions had changed once again:

"Oooh, ooh, I see it, I see it! Through the school entrance!" Samantha said, pointing to the '1st Place' buzzer in the ROTC room inside the School. Zach wiped his eyes, still running. At that point, he reopened them to see that he was about to run into a wall. "Zach?! Zach, what are you doing?" Samantha said to Zach. At that point, Zach sped up and put his head forward, preparing for a headbutt with the wall. "Nooooooooooo!!!" Samantha yelled. Zach headbutted Samantha into the wall and she fell off of Zach's shoulders. Zach, still running in place, said, "Sorry, missie, but I had to do it. Tammi told me to try to win at all costs!  Ooh!  Speaking of costs, did you know that gas used to cost, like, $0.10!?  Now, it's, like, $10!" Zach laughed and took off, "Just a fun fact there! Well, cya!" Zach ran into the ROTC room and smashed the buzzer marked '1st place' as a siren went off.

Tammi, carried by Jeff, ran through and saw Samantha, nearly lifeless, on the floor with a bruise on her head.

Tammi: Way to go, Zach!!

Jeff ran into the school. At that point, Tammi jumped off of Jeff's shoulders and landed in front of him, and began running. "See ya, soldier!!" Tammi said, hitting the '2nd place' buzzer, causing a siren to go off. Jeff hit the '3rd place' buzzer, "Not cool, not cool, not cool, dude!!"

Jeff: That is probably the last time....... EVER that I'm gonna help her. COME. ON!! I did all that work!

Chef blew his airhorn, walking into the ROTC room, "And, that's game!!" "Yes!!" Zach said, cheering.

The scene switched to everyone in the ROTC room, wearing army uniforms (except for Nalyd, Lile, and Dedrek). "Okay, maggots!!" Chef Hatchet yelled. "Congratulations on completing your exercises!" He began to walk down the line, giving everyone fake golden medals, "You have all earned these Total Drama 101 Badges of Fakeness!!" "Awe, they're fake?" Zach sobbed. "Yea, they fake! You gotta problem with that!?" Chef Hatchet said, in his face. Zach shook his head no. Excluding the returnees, everyone but Ryan received a medal. "Hey, where's my medal-thingy!?" Ryan growled. Chef looked at Ryan, "Boy, you didn't do anything...... 'cept cheat in Rock, Paper, Scissors. You don't deserve a medal!" "Ugh! Whatever, I'm sure those that gold can be scratched off anyway!" Ryan yelled. Chef ignored him, "Congratulations to Zach on winning the challenge!" He threw a Hall Pass at Tammi, "And, to Tammi on winning 2nd place's Hall Pass! Everyone, including you scrawny kids over there, it's time to vote someone out....... As if I didn't have to tell you to vote for!  Since the teams are gone, it's anybody's game and you all have to show up at that E-Hall thingy." "D--" Terry said, but remembered earlier and stopped himself. Everyone cleared the room except for Tammi. She tapped Ryan on his shoulder.

Tammi: I've been thinking. Now that we don't have teams to worry about, I've been thinking about Ryan. He's got a killer alliance, and mine is........ Yeah. I have an idea...

"Ryan, can I speak with you for a sec?" Tammi said, sweetly, trying to use reverse psychology. "You want to join my alliance, don't you?" Ryan asked, sweetly, trying to use reverse-reverse psychology. Tammi looked around to make sure no one was present, ".........How did you know?" "I'm smart like that... soldier. Yours is pretty sucky right now, and you probably need more power," Ryan talked. "..... Mmmm," Tammi said, not having a response. "You and your little lackey can join now and vote with us now, and we'll worry about the details later," Ryan said with a small evil look on his face, "Our alliance is doing a favor for someone else for tonight's elimination, but there's a catch for you." "Oh?" Tammi said, rolling her eyes. "Duh. I need your Hall Pass," Ryan said, smiling. "What?! No way!" Tammi scolded him. Ryan smirked, "Then, there's no way I'm letting you and Zach-attack out there in my royal alliance." "Ohhhhhhhhh," Tammi said, scared, "Hmmm...."

The scene skipped to everyone at the Detention Hall Ceremony, after locking their votes in. "Let's get this finished!!" Chef Hatchet grummbled. He threw Golden A+'s to Ariel, Samantha, Stefani, and Tammi, "You guys are safe!!" "Jeff and Zach!" he continued, "you're safe, too!!" He threw A's at the both of them. Spotlights shined on Webby and Ryan. "Okay, this is getting painfully obvious," Chef said, blandly, "Webby, you're safe! Ryan, get the (bleep) outta here!" Chef threw the Golden A+ at Webby, and, again, Ryan stayed seated. "What's the matter, sergeant?! Can't hear!?" Chef yelled out. Again, Ryan exposed the Hall Pass that he got from another contestant. Chef looked at the Pass, "Wait... That's Tammi's!" "Oh, I know," Ryan said sheepishly, "She gave it to me, for a little exchange." Ryan looked over at Lilie, "Oh, and Lilie........ You're welcome!!" Webby immediately gasped. "Well, now that this done happened.... AGAIN.... All votes for Ryan have been terminated, meaning Webby, you have been eliminated," Chef scowled. "Wha-- Wha-- No!! Why?! What did I do!?" Webby said, quickly. "Did you not just hear me, nimrod?!" Ryan scolded him, "Lilie asked me to vote you out... I didn't know who to choose so I went for you, slick!"

Lilie: People mess with Ms. Lilie. Ms. Lilie plays hardball!! You're dismissed, Webby!

Webby immediately got up, as everyone said their goodbyes to him. He walked the walk of shame and left the school premises with nothing to say, other than, "Bye.... I guess,".

The scene then cut to Chef Hatchet in front of the school. An off-screen intern motioned Chef and whispered, "Read the cue cards!" "I ain't readin' them blasted cue cards!!" Chef said, "This show is too good for that anyway." He looked into the camera, "You better tune in and watch this show next week!!! Now, get that camera out of my face!!" Chef Hatchet punched the camera into the cameraman as the scene faded to black.

Chapter Fourteen: Textbook Crooks
"Last time on Total Drama 101!!" Chris said in his usual position. "We commended our troops with a good-ol' R.O.T.C. challenge! Unfortunately, I had to leave because my doof-butt dad-dude sued me for..... 'irreconcilable differences with his car', meh.  Anyway, I decided to bust up the teams this episode and merge everyone together!  From now on, it's one for all and...... that's it!!  And, what's worse?  I brought back 3 schoolmates previously kicked out!  Yes, I brought back Lilie, Dedrek, and Rich-- uhhh, Nalyd, though they didn't compete!!  Anyway, back to the challenge.  Chef took over, and, boy, did he make it hard for our schoolmates!!  We had a giant boot camp obstacle course set up for our challengers!  Only Stefani and Ryan didn't take this seriously.  Stefani, who was in one of her moods only muttered one word that entire episode..... 'whatever'.  And, Ryan?  Let's not go there, Chef doesn't want to hear about him again!" Chef's voice was heard off-screen, yelling, "That boy gon' get it!!" "Riiiiiiight," Chris continued. "Anyway, Zach surprised us all by winning this challenge and invincibility, and, as another surprise, Tammi claimed 2nd place and the Hall Pass for the episode. However, she didn't hold onto it that long.  She took advantage of the teams being dissolved and actually asked Ryan if her alliance and his could combine!  Ryan immediately said yes, in return of her giving the Hall Pass to him, and the girl gave it to him!  Wow... Anyway, surprisingly, at the elimination, it was Webby that got the boot due to Lilie getting Ryan's entire alliance to vote for him for revenge!  That girl is completely crazy sometimes!  Why else do you think we brought her back?  Today, our schoolmates are going to have to remember their 'p's' and 'q's' for this challenge.... literally.  Find out what happens, and who gets today's boot right now on Total.... Drama.... 1-0-1!!"

After the theme song, the camera went into the master bedroom to show Nalyd sleeping in the bed.

Nalyd: It's so good to be back in the room.... my room. (laughs) Back in the game, and back to win it.

The camera panned to the right to see Ryan, sleeping and shivering on the floor with only a pillow.

Ryan: That's too much! I was just getting used to sleeping in the king's bed with one king..... Me!! Ugh, why did Sir Palesalot have to come back to this show?! When you are eliminated, you should stay eliminated. And, that's exactly what I'm going to be telling everyone when I finally win this season.

Ryan finally got up and slapped Nalyd, waking him up. "Whaaa?" Nalyd mumbled. "Get out of my bed!!" Ryan yelled. "It's my bed now, dude," Nalyd smirked and turned the other way. He tried going back to sleep. "Nalyd?.... Nalyd?!.... NALYD!?" Ryan yelled, trying to wake him up. Nalyd began fake snoring, causing Ryan to groan.

Back on the regular floor, the camera went into Tammi's room, who was wide awake, staring up at her ceiling, seeing pictures of Nalyd all over it, generated by her mind.

Tammi: (slaps self) Snap out of it, Tammi! Just because Nalyd's back in the competition doesn't mean I still can't win! You can do this! You're a fighter, you're a warrior, you're.... you're.... you're a cheerleader!! Go, fight, win!!

Tammi looked to her left at her door and saw 'Nalyd', to her right and saw 'Nalyd', down on her floor and saw 'Nalyd' saying, "Hey baby." causing her to scream. "Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!" Tammi screaming in fear and frustration. Zach busted into her room, breaking the door down with a bat. "What's wrong!? What's the problem?!" He yelled with a bat in his shaking hand. Tammi did nothing but smack her head. Lilie and Ariel entered Tammi's room and turned her room light on. "Ughhh, what's the problem in here, guys?" Lilie asked. Zach spoke up, "Tammi was screaming over something, so I had to come and check it out." "You had to?" Tammi asked, abruptively. "Since when did you become my husband!?" A record scratch was heard off-screen. Zach made a retching face and ran out of the room. At that point, all Lilie and Tammi could hear was someone throwing up. "Ugh... He's so goofy," Tammi said. Lilie smiled and joined Tammi by sitting oh her bed, "Tell me about it." They both shared a laugh.

Zach: (rapidly) Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, e-- (confessional cut off)

Jeff, later, opened his door and came out in his pajamas, scratching his butt. He looked up to see Samantha right in front of him, looking at him. Jeff widened his eyes and immediately stopped scratching. "Oh! Sorry, man," Jeff said, embarrassed. Samantha only giggled. A 30 second pause had passed with the two of them not saying anything. Jeff looked to the ceiling of the foyer, "Awk-ward." He walked back into his room and closed the door to get dressed.

Samantha: Oh, boys. They're so kooky. Take Jerome, here, for example. (points to an empty space next to her in the confessional) He's a boy, and he's sooooooooooooo weird! (laughs)

At that point, the camera switched to Dedrek, in his own room. A random note dropped from the sky. He woke up to it on his forehead. He began to read it, as the camera changed into 11 sections, with everyone having the same note in their hands getting ready to read it out loud. Everyone read it, "Meet me in Room 208 for today's English challenge. You're gonna love this one, DUDES!  Signed, your really hot, hot, and hot host, Chris McLean." The camera zoomed in on Ariel's section, "This should be interesting." It zoomed back out and went to Dedrek's section, "Ooh, oui, oui (yes, yes)!" Then, it went to Jeff's section, "Cool." The camera then went to Lilie's section of the screen. She was a tad disgusted, "Yech, was this note written on $0.99 paper?! Ew." "Now's the time," Nalyd said when the camera zoomed into his section. The camera zoomed in on Ryan, who didn't say anything, and crumbled the paper, throwing it somewhere. "Okay!!" Samantha said, when the camera was in her section. Stefani, in her uncaring mood, just said, "I don't care..." The camera zoomed into Terry's section, "Let's go!!" And finally, the camera went to Zach, who, after reading the note, threw up some more over what was said earlier.

The scene switched to everyone in the English room, 208, with Chris standing in front of them. English class textbooks were scattered literally everywhere around the classroom. "Ever heard of Spring Cleaning?" Ryan said, snickering. Nalyd looked at him, "It's summer." Ryan cocked an eye at Nalyd. "Don't start, wench," Ryan said to him. "You guys ready for a little fun!?" Chris said, smiling. "What kind of fun?!" Samantha asked, "Ooh, is it the red kind or the blue kind!? What about the green kind or th--"  Chris covered Samantha's mouth with his hand. "Anyway," he said, after she shut up, "firstly, I'd like to say that fun isn't a candy! Secondly, it's the weird kind of fun!" Samantha opened her mouth again, "Eugh, yellow." This caused Ariel to laugh. "As I was saying!" Chris said, assertively. "I trust you all got my note and know that today's challenge is English!!" He pointed to Ryan and Nalyd, "And, the two princesses back there brought up the point I was going to bring up now. Real people actually get taught in this school sometimes, and they leave the English rooms.... a real mess.  So, I'm making it your challenge to get this room cleaned up!" "That's it?" Jeff asked, scratching his head. "You should know that when I say one thing, I mean another by now, dude," Chris said, "That would be boring! So, here's how it's going to go down.  We'll make this a theft game.  There are exactly 250 textbooks somewhere around this room, all of them books for an English class.  It's your job to steal as many of these books as possible.  And, when I say steal, I pretty much just mean run out of the room with your stack when I blow the airhorn for you to stop.  The person with the most textbooks in their possession will win immunity!!  And, hidden in one of the textbooks, is the coveted Hall Pass that will get you invincibility without even winning!" Jeff waited a few seconds before asking again, "........... Is that it?!" "Noooooooo," Chris said smiling, causing everyone else to groan. "I'd like to add something else to make this a little more difficult for you." Chris went off-screen, came back, and rolled in a giant machine. "What's that nonsense?" Lilie asked out. Chris smiled, proudly, "This, my dear Lillian, is my very own Eraser Gun!" "Uhh.... Huh?" Ariel baffled. Chris sighed, "This is an eraser shooter, but I tricked it out! I loaded it with all colors of erasers that do different things if they touch you." He smiled at pointed to a board, "Check them all out! Try not to get hit by these:"

"Any questions?!" Chris asked. Everyone looked confused after viewing the giant eraser color board. Chris looked at them, "No?" He blew his airhorn, "Commence collecting!!"

Everyone began frantically running around, collecting textbooks. Chris went to man his Eraser Gun. "Got it!" Jeff said, as he picked up a few textbooks. Chris fired a blue eraser and hit Jeff with it. Jeff literally turned into an icicle. "Soooooooo...... c-c-c-c-c-c-c-oooooolddd," he muttered. "I'm coming, Jeff!!" Ariel said, picking up a few books along the way. Ariel ran over to Jeff and punched his ice, nearly breaking his hand in the process. Ariel yelped, "Yeeeeoowww! You're frozen!!" "Man, it's cold in here!!" Chris said, lying, "How about we...... heat up!?" Chris fired a red eraser, hitting Ariel, causing him to set on fire. Ariel immediately began screaming, "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!" He hit the floor, "Stop, drop, roll! Stop, drop, roll!  Stop, drop, roll!  Stop, drop, roll!" As he was rolling the floor, Samantha flipped past him, picking up a few books each time she hit the floor. "This is easy!" Samantha said. Chris fired a yellow eraser at her; Samantha flipped up and kicked it to the roof. The yellow eraser hit a light on the ceiling, causing the light to flicker due to the shock power the eraser had. "You're gonna have to do better than that, welp!" Samantha said, crazily. Chris, then, fired 3 yellow erasers at Samantha. Samantha kicked one to her left, one to her right, and one straight in front of her, which hit Ryan in the face. Ryan dropped all the textbooks he was carrying and leaped in the air, getting shocked and jolted. "Ow... ow.... OW!.... ow.... OW!!" Ryan said as he got shocked every other second. Samantha, then ran over and took a few of his books, adding on to her total.

Samantha: They were just laying there.... I'm sure he won't mind. (smiles)

Over on another side of a room, Tammi was taking down some of the textbooks taped onto the dry-erase board in the English room. "Incomingggggggggggggg!!!" Chris said, as he fired a purple eraser at Tammi. It hit her in the back of the head, getting her attention. She turned around to see that the purple eraser didn't do anything. "HA!" Tammi said to Chris, "Looks like your eraser malfun--" At that point, the eraser made a loud screeching noise. Tammi, along with Dedrek and Lilie beside her, immediately dropped their books to cover their ears. "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Turn that (bleep) off!!" Tammi yelled. "Ze (The) books, ze (the) books!! Get the books!" Dedrek said, with his hands over his ears. "Whaaaaaaaaat?" Lilie yelled out. The purple eraser finally stopped screeching. Dedrek uncovered his ears first and made off with his, Lilie's, and Tammi's pile of textbooks. Dedrek ran away, "Suckasssss!!" He laughed as he ran. "Get back here, Frenchy!" Tammi said as he chased him. Lilie saw that her books were gone and also chased after Dedrek, "I ain't having this! Get back here, you pile of French goop!" "Time for the next one!!" Chris said. He fired a black eraser up at the ceiling. Nalyd looked up, "Innnnnnnnnncoming!!!" The black eraser fell to the center of the room and hit everybody, causing everyone to lose a few of their textbooks. Terry, then, ran into the camera's view; the camera began following him. "Can't get me, can't get me!" He said proudly. Chris looked angered and fired a green eraser at him, hitting him in the chest. Terry began doing everything in slow motion, "Yoooooooouuuuuuuuu'lllllllll neeeeeeeeeveeeeeerrrrrrrr caaaaatchhh mm--" Before Terry could finish his sentence, Chris fired a blue eraser at him, freezing him in a block of ice with his textbooks. At that point, Ryan ran up to him, used one of his textbooks to smash the ice, and stole his textbooks while Terry was still cold and freezing. "R-r-r-r-r-yan, give those b-b-b-b-b-b-back!" Terry muttered. Ryan ran off, "Sorry, couldn't hear ya!"

Ryan: ... So easy!

Chris, then, fired a white eraser towards the ceiling, "Incomingggggggggg!!!" he said again. Everyone looked up. Zach ran over to Jeff, broke him out of his ice chasm and yelled, "Run, dude, runnnnnnnnnnn!!!" Jeff and the rest began running in circles not knowing where to go to avoid the white eraser. It finally hit the ground and covered the entire room with a white steam and smokescreen. "What is this gunk?!" Dedrek yelled. The camera panned over to where his voice was coming from; all that was seen where a very high stack of textbooks floating in the air. The camera then panned over to Nalyd, where nothing but a walking hoodie was shown, due to Nalyd's paleness. He walked around, trying to find textbooks, until he smacked into an object he couldn't see and fell on it. Lilie tried to look over to see the giant stack of textbooks Dedrek was carrying, and scoffed.

Lilie: I don't do losing...... except for the time I was just eliminated, but other than that, I don't do it! And, after stealing my books, there's no way that I'm gonna let him win!

The smokescreen began to clear and Lilie was able to see Dedrek in front of her. She dashed up behind him and pushed him, making him lose his balance. All of Dedrek's books went up into the air. The smokescreen finally cleared and the camera went over to Nalyd to show that the object he crashed into was Tammi. The camera, then, zoomed out to see that he was making out with her. Tammi, who had her eyes closed, opened them to see Nalyd on top of her. "Go, Richie, go!! Get that action!" Chris said to Nalyd. Everyone began to stare at the two of them, and a few of the boys made wolf whistle noises. Tammi got up from under him, "Get off of me, you pale cucumber!!" Tammi punched him and got up, wiping the dirt off of herself.

Nalyd: Hey, I didn't know it was Tammi. (winks) But, hey, again........... she didn't fight it. (smiles) Tammi: It was a total fluke. You can't deny that. Plus, I didn't know what it was because of the smoke. Totally a fluke. (looks away from the camera)

One of Dedrek's textbooks fell from the ceiling and hit Nalyd as he caught it. "Ow, yo!" Nalyd said, trying to sound a bit like a player. Everyone looked up to see Dedrek's books coming down. "It's a free-for-all!!" Zach said, grabbing many of the textbooks coming down. "Thank youuuuuuuuuu, Lilie!" Jeff said, getting a few of the books. "Ewww, you're getting the books with no work!" Chris said, disgusted. He, then, fired a brown eraser at the ground; a horrible odor was emitted in the vicinity of the room, causing a few of the schoolmates to stop catching textbooks so they could cover their noses. "Ugh, what the heck, Chris!?" Ryan shouted. Lilie, running everywhere around the room, was one of the main people who continued to catch books, smelling the odor. She threw one of her books at Ariel, and broke his block of ice. Still cold, Ariel remained motionless. Zach ran over to Ariel, grabbed him, and threw him over to another area in the room, causing Ariel to drop a few of his textbooks. Zach grabbed all that Ariel lost at that point, "Thanks!!" he said, smiling. Lilie ran past Zach, swiping a few of the books from his stack. "Hey!!" Zach said, "Those are mine!" Lilie waved a couple textbooks in Zach's face, "Not anymore!" Tammi looked at her, smiling.

Tammi: That Lilie. Never ceases to amaze me..... Hmmm.... (confessional cut off)

"Last one!!" Chris said. He fired a pink eraser at Stefani, hitting her butt. Stefani looked at Chris, "I don't care..." At that point, Stefani's legs began moving rapidly. She started running all over the room at a super-fast speed. "I don't care, I don't care, I don't care, I don't care, I don't care, I don't care, I don't care!" Stefani kept saying as she ran, collecting a few textbooks along the way that were raining down. Stefani finally stopped as she collided into Terry, falling onto him, her lips hitting his. Both Stefani and Terry's textbooks fell out of their hands since they were on the ground. Lilie caught Terry's books and Samantha caught Stefani's few. Terry's eyes widened as he looked at Stefani on top of him. He fainted, there on the floor.

Zach: Again?! Nalyd: (snickering) Wow, who'da thought, right? Ryan: One loser with another, they're made for each other, you know?

Chris, then, blew an airhorn, "And with make out session, I call an end to this torture! We've already done a count on who had how many textbooks, and here's the stats on-screen:"  Everyone looked up at the monitor in the English room.

"And, with a score of 55 textbooks, I declare Lilie the winner of today's challenge!!" Chris beamed. Lilie threw all of her textbooks in the air, "YES!!!" The textbooks all came down hitting everyone but her a few times. Chris, rubbing his head, continued, "Owwwwwww, anyway. Guys, check inside your books, because I know you didn't!  Book #100 has the Hall Pass!!" Everyone frantically began looking in the covers of their books for book numbers. "Well, whaddaya know?" Ryan said, smiling, and taking the pass out, "Looks like I have it!" Everyone groaned. Chris looked at Ryan and put his hand up, "And, it seems Ryan is invincible.... yet again. Everyone else, you're up for the best elimination at the best ceremony ever!!  I'll see ya there in 10!"

The camera switched scenes to Lilie in Ryan's room with him and Tammi. "You wanted to speak with me?" Lilie said to Tammi. "Yeah," she replied. "Why? Ryan's already immune, so why would he need my invincibility?" Lilie assumed that's what the meeting was for. Ryan cocked an eye at her and almost told her off, but stopped himself, "No, sweetie, it's not about that." "We've been thinking about you," Tammi said, "I've been talking with Nalyd and Jeff.... You are going to be in danger next week." Lilie gasped, "Again?! How so?" "We were talking with the two of them, and they admitted it to us during the challenge!" Ryan lied. Tammi was behind him, shaking her head. "Aw, man," Lilie said, looking down. Tammi grinned evilly, "Now, we really don't wanna see you go. At least not this soon.  So, we were thinking that you need to vote with us so we have strength in numbers tonight and next week to make sure you don't lose." Lilie looked up to them, "That does sound nice." "Doesn't it?" "Eh.... I still don't know. I have an idea, but you probably won't like it." Ryan gasped, "What?" "I'll join in with you guys...... permanently.... if you let me decide who we kill off tonight. I won't be a problem any more after this one." Lilie smiled at them. "Uhhh... Who are you thinking about?" Ryan grinned. Lilie whispered something in both of their ears. Both of them gasped and looked at each other. "Are you sure?" They both said together.

The scene switched to everyone at the Detention Hall Ceremony. "Uhhh, dude?" Jeff said to Chris, "What did that challenge have to do with English?" "....... You were collecting English textbooks, weren't you?" Chris said. "Yeah, I guess, bu--" Jeff was cut off. "Okay, then! Hmm... needless to say," Chris interrupted Jeff, "this ceremony is going to be a bit... dramatic!  I, honestly, have no idea who's going home, this week.  But, I'd like to know right about..... now!  So, lock your votes in, everyone!" Everyone did so, and an intern gave Chris a card with the votes and who was eliminated. "Okay!" Chris took a deep breath and turned around away from the schoolmates. He picked up the tray of Golden A+'s and began throwing behind him. "Dedrek, Jeff, Ariel, Stefani, Samantha, Lilie, Nalyd, Terry, Ryan, Tammi, A+'s for the lot of ya!!" He said. He then threw the pan at Zach, "You're outta here!" Zach gasped, "Huh? What do you mean?" Chris spoke fast, "Out, o-u-t, meaning 'absent, antiquated, at an end, away, cold, dated, demode, doused, ended, expired, extinguished, finished, not allowed, outmoded, passé, ruled out, unacceptable, used up', or in other words..... you just got be-trayed, son! Catchin' on?" Zach spoke up, "I know what it means... I meant why!? Tammi!?" The camera panned to Tammi sitting in a chair, staring at Nalyd. "TAMMI!!" Zach yelled. "Huh, huh, what?" she said, looking at Zach, "Oh, you.... Uhhh... it's just not working out, Zach." she lied. "You backstabber!! You back.... stabber!!!" Zach yelled at Tammi. A few interns came on-screen and literally dragged Zach out of the room, "Nobody join her alliance! She's a backstabber!  A great, big backstabber!!  She'll put an end to you!!"

Ryan: Hey, it wasn't my idea this time. You can blame Lilie. But, I have to admit, no one saw that coming! (laughs) 10 down, 9 to go. Tammi: It was a simple maneuver. Seriously. All we had to do was vote. Plus, Zach's not fit to be in the Finals. And, calling me a backstabber right when leaving is not helping him make me believe he is fit for the Finals. Let him leave!

Chris walked out of the school and stood in front of the schoolgrounds, "Some nutty stuff going on with this bunch, eh? Well... I'm all too used to it with Heather from Season One, Courtney in Season Two, and Alejandro from Season Three.  So, I'm not too surprised.  What will be happening next episode, you ask!?  Well, why don't tune in next week and find out!?  Here!  On Total... Drama... 1-0-1!!" Chris signed the show off as the scene faded to black.

Chapter Fifteen: Baby, Baby, Baby, Nooooo!

 * Alternate Title: Baby Bonanza
 * Alternate Title: The Baby Bunch

"Last time, on Total Drama 1-0-1!" Chris announced. "English History itself will never be the same! Well, it probably will, but not in this school.  The final eleven became the final ten after the shocking English challenge, that literally shocked people.  We had the final eleven scurry around a classroom and try to collect textbooks.  Is that it, you ask?  No way!!  In addition, we also had the eraser shooter; a device which shot out erasers!  The erasers did different things to the final eleven, including shocking them, setting them on fire, paralyzing them -- you name it, every bit of torture!  In the end, Lilie won the challenge, and Ryan got the hallpass for the kajillionth time.  Right before the elimination ceremony, Lilie allied with Ryan and Tammi to take out Zach.  It really wasn't working out between Tammi and her ex-ally.  With Zach out of the game, will the final ten miss their random friend?  Will Tammi hook up with you-know-who? And will this challenge be exciting!? Well, find out, right here, on Total.... Drama.... 1-0-1!!"

After the theme song, all the school-mates sat in the cafeteria, eating their breakfast, which was a heaping bowl of fish-guts, served by Chef Hatchet. "Fish-guts!? Really, people?" Tammi groaned, eying her food. "I've seen better food at homeless shelters!!" "Oh... that's right, I forgot you lived there. How's the service?" Ryan grinned. "Don't talk to her like that!!" Nalyd cried, banging his fist on the table. Ryan gasped, shocked by Nalyd's abrupt reaction. "Okay, sheesh! Take a pill, Wonder-Woman." "This may just be the most disgusting thing I have ever eaten in my entire life, bro!!" Jeff cried, pushing his plate away. Dedrek, who sat beside the disgusted Jeff, grimaced in disgust. "What is zis (this) 'bro' you speak of?" "You dun goof'd," Stefani pointed an accusing finger at Jeff, falling asleep in her food shortly after. "I'm just saying, this food is disgusting!! Any kind of service around this crap-cave would be nice!" Tammi shouted. "We don't want to give you any good food, Tammi... haven't you seen the other seasons!? We only give you things we can afford," Chris informed Tammi through the intercom. "But, you can afford exploding eraser-gun thingies!!" Ariel argued. "And cool, special effects, boom, boom, hahahaha!" Samantha laughed uncontrollably. "And a mansion. With a master suite." Nalyd reminded him. Ryan rolled his eyes. "You can also afford to let losers run around in your show, evidently," he smirked, jerking his thumb in Nalyd's direction. "Okay, fine!! We can afford it! Alright?  We just feel like less good food gets you more excited for the reward after this challenge!" Chris spoke through the intercom. "So, it's a reward challenge!" Lilie snapped her fingers. "Nuh-uh," Chris sneered. "I'll meet you losers down there in ten minutes. Because you're the final ten! Ha!" All the school-mates groaned unenthusiastically at Chris' lame joke.

Chris came into the cafeteria to meet the Final Ten, "Hello, parents!" Ryan gasped, "Oh, no." "Oh, yes!!" Chris said, beaming, "Today's challenge subject is Parenting!! I know you've all thought about being parents before, having a child to love forever and ever and ever and ever, right?" Everyone looked around, awkwardly.

Ariel: We're 16!! We can't think about children yet! (shudders) Tammi: Awwww, this should be interesting. My kid's gonna have Nalyd's eyes, and-- (gasps as the confessional cuts off)

Chris continued, "We have divided the 10 of you into groups of two where there will be 5 babies and 5 couples, and here they are, on-screen!!" Everyone looked up at the monitor in the Parenting room.

"There we go!" Chris said, "All the girls on one side of the monitor, and.... your new hubbies on the right side." Stefani looked up at the monitor and then fell while trying to look up at it. Terry watched as she hit the ground.

Terry: O-M-G! Stefani's my.... my.... m-m-my.... (faints in confessional, a hose-like spewing noise is heard) Stefani: (laughing and hiccuping, unintelligibly) I dun got me a baby. (laughs and falls out of chair)

Jeff and Tammi looked at each other, then looked at Chris. "That guy? With me?!  No way!" they both scowled at Chris. Chris smiled and laughed, "Yes, way. Our producers thought that since the two of you have been having a few difficulties in the past, that maybe raising a child together would get you back in each others' good graces."

Chris: .... (touches nose) Good thing I'm not Pinocchio. (laughs)

Ryan laughed at everyone's misfortune and talked to himself, "Wow, everyone's set up with losers. I wonder which girl I have.  Eh. I don't want any of them, I'd sooner have--" Ryan looked up at the monitor and immediately yelled, "NALYD?! What!?  I'd rather be with a slipper than be with him!  And, I'm not a girl, FYI, Captain Lame-o!" "You sure?" Chris questioned, scratching his head, causing Ryan to scoff. Chris laughed and continued, "I'm just kidding, but due to the... uhh... imbalance of males and females, we're going to have a-- How should I put this? --custom couple?" Nalyd frowned, "Can't I be with..... my la-deh?" He winked at Tammi, and then fell. Tammi looked at him with disgust then snootily put her head up. "If he gets Tammi, I'm gonna go find that slipper," Ryan assured everyone. "No switching!" Chris snapped at them all. He went over to the corner of the room, pulled out a dusty box, and came back to the Final Ten. He coughed as he blew the dust off and opened the box to reveal 5 dolls. He threw a male doll at the dazed Stefani. It ricocheted off her head, causing her to fall again, and Terry caught it. The baby immediately started crying over the pain. "Incoming!!" Chris said. He bulleted the next male baby at Jeff. Tammi literally walked plain into Jeff's way and the baby hit Tammi's arm. The doll fell on the floor and began crying. Jeff picked up the doll, "Nice going, sweetie," he said, sarcastically.

Tammi: (sighs angrily) I have had it with Jeff! I don't see how this is going to work!!

Chris tossed another male baby at Samantha. Samantha caught it and saw gray stuff on his head, "Cooooooooool." Dedrek approached her and snatched the baby from her hands. "Impudent American!" Dedrek said. He wiped the gray stuff off of the doll, "It's dust! And, you have no idea how to hold a baby!" Dedrek began rocking the doll and it began cooing. Lilie and Tammi went "Aweeee" over Dedrek's feminine side.

Dedrek: (rocking the doll in the confessional) I'm winning this challenge if it's ze (the) last thing I do! (looks into the doll's eyes) Qu'est ce que. (Hmmm.) Can you say 'Dedrek'? Deeeeeeeeeeed-reeeeeeeeek? (the doll coos and happily yelps)

"Hmm, this one's different," Chris said, pulling out a female baby. He threw the female baby at Lilie. Lilie stepped out of the baby's flight area as Ariel caught it behind her. "Awe, she's cute!" Ariel said, walking over to Lilie. Lilie snatched the baby from Ariel, "She's gonna be a successful businesswoman one day." Ariel looked at her, a bit freaked out.

Ariel: (laughing) Can someone say.... ' already attached ' !?

"Last one!" Chris said, throwing a male baby at Nalyd and Ryan. Neither of them made an attempt to catch the baby as they were both staring and growling at each other. The baby crashed onto the floor and began crying. Ryan covered his ears and looked at Chris, "Can you shut that loud, annoying, bratty little freak up!?" "Calm down, it's barely crying," Chris told him, "Anyway. Moms.... Dads..... Ryans..... we'll be having two challenges today!  You 5 couples will go wherever you want in either the school or the mansion behind us and think about the baby name you're going to give your doll.  The best sounding baby name, based on level of cuteness and sensibility, will win an advantage in the next challenge!" Chris threw a string of baby wipes out the window and jumped out of it by sliding down the wipes, "Think quickly!!" he said.

The scene cut to Jeff & Tammi walking towards the cafeteria of the school and talking. "Can you hold Little Dude, Tammi?" Jeff said, "My arms are getting tired." Tammi turned back at him, "Okay, number one, we're not calling him 'Little Dude'. And, number two, you're the man of this relationship, you're supposed to be strong!" Tammi kept walking towards the cafeteria.

Jeff: (sigh) I would take anybody else to be my partner. Even Ryan. But, Tammi?! Why did you have to stick me with her, producer-dudes?! Tammi: I like the fact that we're learning how to be the (air quotes) 'People of Tomorrow', but my husband seriously needs to at least be a 'Person of Today', at LEAST. He's so stupid, I swear.

"Just because I'm the guy in this relationship doesn't mean I'm going to be doing all the work with this thing," Jeff said. Jeff looked ahead of him at Tammi to see that she was filing her nails, ignoring him. "TAMMI!" Jeff shouted, angrily. "Ugh, what?!" she yelled. Jeff looked at her, "You know, dude, if you don't take care of this kid, I won't either.... and, then you'll get voted out." "You don't even know what the challenge is, you glorified surferboy!" Tammi snapped back, "Now, make sure our little Jammi's okay." Tammi snapped her nail file in her fit of anger, "UGH! I'm going to get a new one." "But, we're not done yet!" Jeff said to her. Tammi ignored him and headed for the mansion.

Jeff: Jammi? Is that a boy or a girl name? I can't even tell. (sighs)

Back in the mansion, in Stefani's room, Terry was taking care of his baby and Stefani, as well. Stefani hiccuped, laughed and looked at Terry, "What's the little guy's name?" "I don't know yet, Stefani, that's the challenge," Terry said, frustrated.

Terry: She's dazed and a little confused right now.... (sweats).... but still sooooooo hot. I don't know how we're going to get through this.

"We need to think of a name, Stefani." Terry mumbled. "How about (unintelligible gibberish)?" Stefani garbled. Terry cocked an eyebrow up, "What? He'd get clowned at the park if we named him that." Stefani came over to Terry. She sat on his lap, "O-M-G, you're sooooooooooo right. You're smart." she said, confused. Terry began sweating and stumbling over his own words, "R-r-r-r-reall--" Stefani tried putting her finger on his lips, but ended up putting her whole hand on his face, "Sh, sh, sh, shh." Terry only whimpered. Stefani literally took the doll from Terry's hands, threw it across the room, causing it to cry, and threw herself and Terry on her own bed and began making out with him. At that point, Tammi came into the mansion. "Ugh... He aggravates me so much, sometimes!" Tammi scowled, talking about Jeff. She then heard sucking noises coming from a random area. "Ewww, is there a plumber here?" she asked, confused. She walked towards her own room, but noticed that Stefani's door was open. She peaked in and saw her and Terry lip-locking and screamed. "Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!" she screamed, getting their attention. Stefani finally stopped sucking face with Terry to reveal, once again, that he passed out during mid-make out.

Tammi: (shudders) It was like... seeing a skunk suck a mop! It wasn't pretty.

Stefani slapped Terry. Terry rose up as the camera zoomed in on his face, to show that lipstick was all over his lips. Terry gasped, "Tammi!! When did you get here?!" "Just now, and I come in to see you locking lips with her, again! Ew!" Tammi yelled, storming out of Stefani's room.

Terry: So, Stefani kissed me again, what of it? Doesn't mean you have to be mad. Unless, of course, she's jealous. (laughs and winks, but falls out of the confessional chair)

Later, Dedrek & Samantha, in Dedrek's room discussing. Samantha gasped, "Oh, what about Garble?! Chris will love that!" "'Qu'est ce que...' (Hmm...)," Dedrek questioned. Dedrek was rocking the baby some more and sighed, "Mon cheri--" "What kind of name is 'Mon Cheri'?!" Samantha interrupted him, yelling. Their doll began crying. "Ohhh, ohhh," Dedrek said frustrated, "I could really use some crepes right now." The baby immediately stopped crying and began cooing again. Dedrek and Samantha both gasped, "Oh! Crepe!!" The baby began laughing. Samantha took the doll from Dedrek and began playing with it, "Who's a good wittle Crepe-y-Wape-y? Who's a good wittle boy!?" She threw the baby up, "Ooops!", and caught him, "... a-daisy!" She repeated this process for a while, scaring Dedrek. "Oh! My Crepe! Samantha, be careful, vous personne stupide (you stupid person)!" Dedrek yelled, trying to get the baby from Samantha.

"I think Rose works," Lilie said to Ariel, nicely in Lilie's room. "Whatever's fine with me," he said, with the only female baby in his hands. Lilie went over and tickled the kid, "Oh, Rose. She's so cute." Rose began cooing and yawned in Ariel's arms. Ariel began pacing, "Awwwwwww." Unfortunately, Ariel tripped on nothing and the baby fell out of his hands. Lilie gasped, dove, and caught the baby, letting out a sigh of relief. Rose began crying. "Ughhhh, now look what's happened!" Lilie screamed at a scared Ariel. Lilie went away from Ariel and started talking to Rose. "It's gonna be okay, it's gonna be okay," she said in a baby-like voice, "I have an idea. You like lullabies?  I have a good one." Ariel only looked at the two of them as Lilie began to sing.

"Hush, my baby, don't cry a peep. The moon's in the sky, let's count the sheep. One, two, three, four, I said, 'hush, shush, shh, snore'. Don't wah, laugh, cry or roar. One, two, three, four, I said, 'hush, shush, shh, snore'. One, two, three, four, Sleep tight, not a sound 'til morn..."

Rose immediately began yawning again and went adrift and asleep in Lilie's arms. "Okay, I think that did it," Lilie said, turning around to Ariel. She looked up to see a teary-eyed Ariel. "T-t-t-t-hat was th-th-the most beautiful thing I've ever heard!!" he said, sobbing with tears coming out of his eyes and snot coming out of his nose. Lilie could do nothing but fake smile due to Ariel looking quite gross.

The camera switched scenes to Nalyd and Ryan, in their Master Bedroom. "I happen to like winning challenges, instead of lazing off, thinking about other idiots," Ryan said on the bed, referring to Nalyd, "so, I'm choosing the name." Nalyd, on the other side of the bed only sighed, "You think Tammi would like the name 'Nalyd, Jr.'?" He laughed, romantically as Ryan made retching noises.

Ryan: Those two boneheads are gonna be the death of me! UGH! I'm never winning this challenge with him as my partner.

"I have an idea!" Ryan said, fake smiling, "Why don't we just split our names in two to make the thing's name?!" Nalyd smirked, "Fine, so, we'll call him 'Ralyd'?" Ryan started, "Sure, we can c--". A record scratch was heard in the distance. "How come you get more letters?!" Ryan complained, "It should be 'Nyan'!" "Just because I can't get more letters, doesn't mean you should!" Nalyd struck back. Ryan sighed, "Oh, come..... ON! We both get 2 letters!  The 'y' is just...... in the wrong place!" Nalyd thought about this. "Hmm, I never thought about that," he admitted. "Of course you didn't... Now let's get back to Chris so we can finish this crap!" Ryan replied in a smart-aleck fashion.

A siren that sounded like a baby wailing soon rang, causing the 5 couples to get up and go to the cafeteria. "Sooooo, how's the parents?" Chris said in a sing-song voice. The camera panned from couple to couple. Jeff was rocking their baby as Tammi continued to file her nails. The camera then panned to the floor to see Stefani & Terry's baby on it, not being held by anyone. The camera zoomed out to show Stefani sucking face with Terry, yet again. It, then, moved to Dedrek and Samantha. Dedrek was trying to play 'Peek-a-Boo' with Crepe, but every time he would close his eyes, Samantha threw Crepe up, watching him almost hit the ceiling and come back down in the same spot when Dedrek reopened his eyes. Samantha only giggled as the camera panned to Lilie & Ariel, both together. Ariel was holding and rocking Rose as Lilie was singing the same soft lullaby to her. Finally, the camera went over to Nalyd & Ryan who were literally playing tug-of-war with Nyan.

Chris cringed, "Okay! Hopefully you've all thought of names by now.  Like I said, the winner of this challenge gets an advantage in the next challenge, which will be seeing how well you can really take care of your baby.  But before we get into that chaos, let's hear these names!  Best name gets it!  Ariel & Lilie, ladies are always first!" Lilie and Ariel went up to Chris with their child. "Name, please?" Chris demanded. "Her name is Rose, thank you," Lilie said, professional-like. "Thank you, next up is...... Samantha and Dedrek!" Chris announced. Samantha and Dedrek went up to Chris, with Samantha holding the child. Chris looked up, "Name, please?" "Mr. Pew!" Samantha said, happily. A record scratch was heard in the distance. "Nice one," Chris said, laughing, "now, name, please?" Dedrek took the baby from Samantha, "Who is 'Mr. Pew'?" "Whoa, whoa, wrong show, Frenchy," Chris said to Dedrek, "I'm Chris, not Alex. Now, what's your baby's name!?" "Sacre bleu! His name is Crepe!!" Dedrek yelled. "Crepe? Seriously?  Like the food?" Chris asked, stifling a laugh. Dedrek groaned, going back to his place with Samantha backflipping behind him. "Jeff? Tammi? Your bundle of joy's name, please?" Chris said as they walked up to him. Jeff & Tammi looked at each other for a few seconds, then looked at their baby. "Uhm... You see, Chris.... We.... Uhh..... Y'know....," Tammi stuttered. "Anytime now," Chris said, tapping his finger on the table he was sitting in. Jeff began thinking out loud, "J-j-j-j-j-uhhhh..." "Hammi, Pammi, Sammi, Rammi, hmmm," Tammi said, out loud. "Juhhh," Jeff said. "..... ammi," Tammi finished. They both gasped, "JAMMI!!" Chris wrote the name down, "Uhh.... Interesting way to come up with the name. Next up is, Stefani and....," he looked at the list again, "Terry!" Stefani bow-leggedly walked up to Chris with Terry and their child behind her. "Name, pl--" Chris was interrputed. "COMMODORE GERONIMO YOSHI!!" Stefani yelled out, right before hitting the floor and falling asleep again. Chris got up from his chair, looked at Stefani, then looked at Terry, "Is she serious?" "Better than nothin'. We didn't come up with anything," Terry said, rocking the doll. "Why can't you just combine your own stupid names?" Chris asked. "That's a great idea!" Terry said, "We'll combine our own stupid names!! Let's see.... uhh... Steffy? No... Terstef?  Ew, no... uhh... Stefterry?  GAH!" Terry gasped, "Ooh! Terani!!  Stefani, you like that?" Still passed out, Stefani farted. "She likes it, Chris!" Terry said, happily dragging Stefani's unconscious body back over to their spot. Chris sighed sadly, "Now, for the.... err... custom couple. Nalyd, Ryan, could you guys stop flirting with each other long enough to come up with something?" Nalyd went up, "Sure, we did, w--" Chris began laughing. "What?!" Ryan scowled. "He just admitted that you guys were flirting," Chris said, laughing and snorting. Ryan smacked his head, "Whatever, the thing's name in Nyan." "Nyan?" Chris asked, "You mean, like that stuff they use for women's stockings?" "No, that's nylon. He's Nyan." "That big tall dude's last name with the blue Ox?" "No, that's bunyan. He's NYAN!" "That girl's makeup stuff?" "No, that's Av-- What's wrong with you!?" Chris writes 'Nyan' down on the list, "Nothing, I just love to mess with you. You're so easy!" Ryan ignores this and literally throws Nyan at Chris, causing him to cry. Nalyd rushed over and grabbed Nyan, "Careful, you jerk!!" "Ugh, whatever!" Ryan responded.

"Okay, parents!" Chris said to everyone, "After review of the rather.... interesting names, challenge one's win goes to........ Jeff and Tammi!!" "Whoo-whoo!!!" they both shouted at the same time. Both Jeff & Tammi were about to give each other a high five, but then remembered who they were about to give it to, and stopped.

The scene changed to everyone out of the cafeteria and now in an area of the Parenting room. "Elimination challenge!!" Chris said, in a sing-song voice, "No baby, no entry, no invincibility for one, but you all have your babies, so here ya go! First of all, Jeff, Tammi, for winning the first challenge, your team receives 5 bonus points!  Allow me to explain.  Challenge two will be nothing but testing how great of parents you are by dividing challenge two into numerous mini-challenges.  We will test you on how well you can: stop a baby from crying, get a baby laughing, and put a baby to sleep!  Each mini challenge has rewards.  First place or best performance for each challenge gets 5 points, second place gets 4 points, third places gets 3, fourth 2, and fifth 1 point.  But, here's the thing.  After we figure out who gets first place, that team decides who gets 2nd, 3rd, 4th, and 5th!  Unfair, I know!  But, hey, you better fight for first!  Again, for winning challenge one, Surfer Boy and Bossy Girl over there start off with 5 points right off the bat! Nice, huh? After all the mini challenges are over, the team with the highest amount of baby points wins the challenge and invincibility. Second place both get Hall Passes, as a special bonus. Third place gets the first Golden A+'s of this week. Fourth place gets the second set. And, last place goes to the Detention Hall Ceremony to figure out who gets the boot!!" Everyone gasped over the last thing said. "Yes, I know," Chris laughed, "Only the team that comes in last will go to the ceremony, and since it's obvious that you guys will vote each other out and result in a tie, we'll think of another way to eliminate just one of you. Heh, any questions?!" Nalyd raised his hand, "Yeah, can I ask a dumb one?" Behind him, Ryan began laughing, "Can you ask a dumb question!? Better than anyone I know!" Chris ignored the two of them, "If there are no questions, let's get started!!"

The camera switched scenes to everyone in the play area in the Parenting room, near each other with their children. Chris, in front of them, told them, "First challenge?? Get your babies to shut up!!" "But, they're not crying," Ariel corrected him. Chris blew his airhorn, causing all 5 babies to cry. "GO!" Chris announced. "You just had to say something," Lilie scorned, slapping Ariel. Ariel ran over to a bin of toys and searched for something. He pulled his hand out to see that he and someone else was holding a rattle. Ariel looked over to see that it was Tammi. "Hi, Tammi!!" Ariel said, reluctantly. "Hello, Ariel," Tammi said, with an evil grin upon her face.

Tammi: Right now, my alliance consists of me, Ryan, Ariel, Lilie, Terry, and Samantha. We're dominating, so I'm sure I'm not going home tonight..... but...... being sure never hurt. (winks)

"Can I have this, pwease?" Tammi faked a baby voice at Ariel. Ariel smiled, "Oh, of course." He let go of it, causing it to come back at Tammi, hitting her in the face. Ariel stayed in the toy bin as Tammi went back over to Jeff. "What'd you get, dude?" Jeff asked. Tammi held up a rattle, "This thing." She shook it in front of Jammi, "C'mon, Jammi-Wammi..." Jammi continued to cry, frustrating Tammi. "UGH!! Work, you glorified spoon, work!!" Tammi said, shaking the rattle. "Your yelling's gonna make it worse, man!" Jeff yelled back at her. Jammi began crying even more as the camera went over to Stefani & Terry. Terry makes funny faces in front of Terani, "Oooh, oooh, blar, blar, blah, blah, blarrrrrr," he mumbled. Terani, still crying over the airhorn sound, continued. "Any ideas, Stefani?" Terry said. He looked over to Stefani and saw that she was dancing away from Terani.

Terry: Constant making out... Weird mood swings... Constant making out... stupid activities................... Constant making out. (shudders) Oh-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h, her lips. Those lovely lips. Stefani: (scratching her head like a monkey for about 10 seconds)

Terry sighed, "I'm on my own here," he began rocking Terani and the crying went down a little more and eventually stopped. Terry's eyes became wide as he nearly wet his pants over what he did, "Guys! My baby stopped!!!" "And, that's 1st place and 5 points to the Steffy-Terry power team!" "That's what I'm talkin' about! Points for the joints!!" Terry said, trying to think of a rhyme. Chris walked over to Terry, "Okay, since Stefani is.... uhh.... busy dancing right now, I guess you can choose by yourself the other positions!" "If you say so," Terry muttered, "2nd place should be A--" Terry was interrupted by Ryan's rather large and obnoxious coughing. The camera panned over to him to show that Nalyd punched him in the back to see if he could get the cough out. Ryan fell to the floor. "2nd place is Ryan & Nalyd," Terry corrected himself, "3rd place is Tammi & Jeff, 4th place is Lilie & Ariel, and 5th place is Samantha & Dedrek." "Great placings!" Chris said, "I'll be keeping score!" He took out a Universal Remote Control with many settings on them and hit the 'Off' button on it. This action caused the other 4 babies to stop crying. "That's all you had to do!?" Tammi snapped at Chris. Chris looked at her, "Uhhhh..... Yeah, duh?" Tammi smacked herself.

The scene switched to everyone in another area of the Parenting room, where the walls were covered with faces and smiles about. "Next challenge!" Chris said, "Your babies are all in 'Idle' mode right now. It is your responsibility to find a way to make the kids laugh!  It's fairly simple...... You know...... if you're funny." Chris turns them off 'Idle' mode and shouts, "Ready, set, ha, ha, ha, ha, GO!" Ariel began walking up to Chris, "But, how do we--" he immediately tripped over himself and landed on the floor. His & Lilie's baby, Rose, immediately began laughing. "Uhhhh...... What?" Dedrek said, looking at the laughing Rose. "I did it, I did it!!!" Ariel said. "Yeah, yeah, you're a big kid now," Ryan scoffed, "Chris, is that really fair?! That challenge only lasted like 10 seconds, and the rest of us aren't lucky to be gifted with social awkwardness like Ariel." Ariel giggled, "Awe, thank you!" "You're.... welcome?" Ryan said, confused. "Why wouldn't it count? Just because you didn't get the points doesn't mean it's unfair, 'Dad'," Chris told Ryan, "Ariel, you and Lilie know the drill." Ariel was about to open his mouth, when Lilie closed it and spoke, "2nd place goes to Nalyd & Ryan again, 3rd place goes to Tammi & Jeff, 4th place is Dedrek & Samantha, and 5th place is Stefani & Terry." "GUMDROPS!!" Stefani randomly shouted when Lilie said her name. Everyone just stared at her, laying on the ground. "Well, that's finished, I guess," Chris said, "I think that was the shortest challenge in Total Drama History up to date................. Okay, historic moment OVER! Next challenge!"

The camera shifted scenes to everyone in another part of the Parenting classroom where the walls were decorated with pictures of the sky, clouds, and angels sleeping. "Final challenge!!" Chris said, "This one will make or break a person or two, so be sure to give it your all!" Chris blew his airhorn for the final time. The camera went over Samantha & Dedrek first. Crepe was cooing in Dedrek's hands. "Ohhhh, no, no! How can I get you to go to sleep when I'm so cute and lovable right now?" Dedrek said, worried, "Any ideas, Sam? Sam??" Dedrek turned around to see Samantha asleep herself. "WAKE UP!!!" Dedrek screamed at the top of his lungs, still worried. This woke Samantha up but caused Crepe and Rose to cry. The camera panned over to Lilie and Ariel. "Now look what you've done, Paris!" Lilie shouted, holding Rose, "Ugh!" It then moved on over to Tammi & Jeff who were talking back in forth. "What if we--" Jeff tried to suggest something. "No," Tammi interrupted. "But, what about--" "No." "How about if we--" "No." "We coul--" "No."

Jeff: Yank her batteries out, because she really sounds like a broken record player right now. (mocks) 'No, no, no, no, no'.... (confessional cut off)

The camera went to Nalyd & Ryan. Ryan was holding the baby, thinking, until he looked at Nalyd, and grinned.

Ryan: Chris said we had to find a way to get our kids asleep. He didn't say how! (evil grin)

Ryan literally walked over to Nalyd, with Nyan in his hands, grabbed Nalyd's face and shoved it Nyan's eyesight. "LOOK AT IT! LOOK AT IT, AND FALL ASLEEP!" Ryan said, clutching Nalyd's head. "Oww!" Nalyd yelled, "What's th--" At that point, snoring was heard. Both Nalyd and Ryan looked over and saw Nyan passed out in Ryan's arms. Ryan gasped, "He's..... he's really asleep, jus-- JUST LIKE I THOUGHT HE WOULD DO!"

Nalyd: (with a paper bag on his head) There is no way my face is that repulsive to get a baby to fall asleep looking at it. Pure freakin' coincidence!

The camera panned over to Chris, but only his legs were shown as he fell out of his chair, laughing at what just happened. "Oh.... oh.... oh, my goodness!" Chris said, trying to catch his breath, "Due to Nalyd's face," Chris snickered, "him and Ryan win this mini-challenge and get to choose the placings! Nalyd, take all the time your face needs, bro!" "Ugh... Just do it randomly, who cares?" Ryan said, confidently. "Well, okay, then," Chris said. He put random placings down for the third round and directed everyone to look at the Total Drama 101 monitor in the Parenting room to see the scores.

"Huh... Wow," Chris said, "Well, thanks to the first challenge and the random point distribution at the very end, what could have been Nalyd & Ryan's game is now Jeff & Tammi's! Jeff and Tammi win the challenge, and invincibility!  2nd place, Nalyd & Ryan!  You both get these!" Chris threw, in a rare instance, two Hall Passes out to Nalyd and Ryan. They both caught one, happily. "Next, 3rd place, which is Lilie and Ariel!! You're safe tonight!" Chris said, throwing a Golden A+ to Lilie, then one to Ariel. Chris continued, "Fourth place, Stefani & Terry! Congrats!!" He threw a Golden A+ at Terry. At that point, Stefani woke back up again, got clanked in the head by her Golden A+ and passed out yet again. "Dedrek, Samantha, last place.... Tsk, tsk, tsk, I'll be seeing you at Detention Hall Ceremony....... even though it looked like we just had one.... but I don't care!" Dedrek, scared, looked at Samantha, who only looked back at him.

At the Detention Hall Ceremony, Dedrek, Samantha, and Chris were all alone in the D-Hall room. "Okay! Sooooooooo, we still never thought of a way to decide on how to eliminate one of you, so, we're gonna tr--" Chris was interrupted by Samantha, who got up, walked towards the door, and walked out of the Detention Hall Room. A record scratch, again, was heard out of nowhere. "What's she doing!?" Dedrek wondered. "Heck if I know," Chris said back, confused. Chris chased after her by running out the door. "Sam--" Chris was stopped when he saw Samantha right in front of him, with a jetpack on. She ignitioned it, and blasted out of the school, making a hole in the ceiling. Chris looked up the hole, "AT LEAST TELL US WHAT YOU'RE DOING!!!" he yelled. He then looked back down to see the camera was on him. "Can we just say she quit or something?" he whispered to an off-screen producer, "Okay, good. Well!!  I don't really know what's going on here, but.... I'll give Dedrek the Final Golden A+.  Uhh... Now, we're somehow down to 9.  Hopefully we won't have any kind of baby elimination like we just did there, but join us next time to see who gets the next book next time on Total.... Drama.... 1-0-1!!!" Chris signed the show off, as the screen faded to black right when a piece of the ceiling fell on Chris knocking him out.

Chapter Sixteen: Computer Drips
"Last time on Total Drama 1-0-1!" Chris yelled. "Only the strong could survive, as the school-mates... became parents and were forced to take care of baby dolls!! Highlight of the episode?  The Final Ten were divided into groups of 2, with one male and female each.  We had a... umm... imbalance of males and females, so we had to have a couple of two males.  Not saying there's nothing wrong with that, but we all thought it was hilarious that Nalyd & Ryan got put together in this challenge.  Anyway, after many challenges of proving what great parents the schoolmates can be, it was the Tammi-Jeff dream team that won the challenge and invincibility.  Dedrek & Samantha, the only couple forced to go to the D-Hall Ceremony due to coming in last, were on pins and needles about which of them would be eliminated.  But, what did come as a shocker... was the fact that Samantha literally.... left the school.  We still don't have the reason for why she did that, but it was Samantha. The crazy get crazier, right? Heh, yeah. This week, our schoolmates push their brains to the absolute LIMIT! Will Tammi ever admit the obvious?! Will Stefani be dazed and confused yet again!? And, who will be the next person voted out of the competition?! Find out right now, on Total... Drama.... 1-0-1!!"

After the theme song ended, the Final Nine, minus Ariel, were seen in a circle in the foyer of the mansion. At that point, Ariel came out with a weird hand-held device. "So, explain to us what we're doing?" Terry asked Ariel. "It's called Truth or Lies!" Ariel said, pointing to the device as he set it down on the floor in the center of everyone. The device was circular, silver, and had 10 finger-holes around it's edges. Above the 10 holes were a red light and a green light above the red one, and on top of the device was a moderately-big red button with 'Truth or Lies' inscribed on it. "How did you get this thing?" Jeff wondered. "It's some prototype-thing my friend's folks are working on." "Sweet." "Yeah, here's how it works. It's like a mini-lie detector test.  Everyone chooses a finger-hole, then, someone presses the button on top, and this thing randomly lights up one green light in someone's area, and as many red lights as it wants on other areas.  If your green light comes on, you get to ask a question to everyone who had their red lights come on.  After they all answer, they put their finger in the hole.  If you answered the question truthfully, nothing happens; if you answered it wrong, you get... shocked!  It's fun, try it!" Ryan rolled his eyes, "Why am I here?! And, who knows where this contraption's been?  I'm not sticking these beautiful fingers in there!" Jeff then began smiling and started making playful chicken noises. "Bawk, ba-ka-bawk, bawk," he muttered. Ryan smugly replied, "That doesn't phase me." Jeff begin doing it louder, causing everyone to join. "UGH!" Ryan responded, picking a finger hole. After a while, everyone chose an area, and Ariel slammed the button down. The lights began flashing, and the device finally pinged. The green light flashed on Lilie while Ariel, Jeff, and Nalyd's lights flashed red. "Hmm, so do I ask the question?" Lilie said to Ariel, who shook his head yes. Lilie smiled, "Splendid. Uhh... You guys got a secret obsession?" Ariel, Jeff, and Nalyd answered in that order. "No." "Nah." "Psh. Of course not." Nothing happened with Ariel and Jeff, but Nalyd got electrocuted as a buzzing noise was heard. "Ow, ow, owwww!!!" he screamed, "I thought you said we were just gonna get a shock, Ariel!" "...... A super-shock?" he replied back to Nalyd, "Come on! It's fun!"

Nalyd: .... There's definitely something wrong with that kid. That wasn't fun... That was painful! Plus, Tammi just heard me scream like a girl. Not cool.

"So, Nalyd, what's your secret obsession?" Dedrek playfully asked him. Nalyd stuck his head up. "I'm not obligated to answer that," he said, putting his finger back in for another round. The remaining schoolmates threw a finger in one of the holes, as Nalyd pressed the top button down. The lights started flashing everywhere again. The green light flashed in Terry's area, while Dedrek, Stefani, Jeff, and Tammi's lights flashed red. "Ooooooh," Terry remarked. He then scratched his head, which was followed by a dinging noise. "I know! Do you guys think I'm cool!?" Terry shouted, smiling. In that order, the four responded. "And how?!" "Sure!" "I guess." "....... Yeahhhhhh." The buzzing noise was heard again, and all four of them got electrocuted. Terry gasped, "None of you do!?" Terry ran off, sobbing. "There goes the drama queen," Ryan smugly said. Tammi looked at him, "Will you ever have anything nice to say?" "Will you ever stop looking like puke on a hot day?" "Will you ev--" "Hey!" Ariel spoke up, "Can we continue? We can play without Terry." Once again, everyone stuck their finger in, ready for another round. Jeff hit the button on top, causing lights to flash everywhere. When they stopped, only two lights were on. A green one flashed on Ryan and a red one on Nalyd. Ryan looked evilly at the device, as Nalyd rolled his eyes. "This should be tre (very) interesting," Dedrek said to himself. "Nalyd," Ryan said confidently. Nalyd clenched his fist behind his back, ".... What?" "Is it true that you have a crush on T--" Ryan was interrupted by a message on the intercom from Chris. Chris spoke in the intercom, "'00101101011010101101101'! That's computer-talk for 'meet me in the school Computer Lab ASAP'!" "What!? No!!" Ryan grumbled.

Ryan: (points to the screen) You did that on purpose! Can you hear me, Chris?! I was just about to-- to-- Ugh!! Nalyd: I never thought I'd say this, but... thank you, Chris. (smiles a little)

Everyone got up and began walking to the Computer Lab, but Nalyd, who sighed. "What's wrong?" Ariel said to him. "That was computer talk, alright, but he didn't say anything about a computer lab. He just insulted my mother." Nalyd walked out of the room, with a clenched fist again.

The Final Nine, now with Terry, came into the Computer Lab classroom, filled with computers and other accessories. Chris was standing in the front of the room. "Welcome, my system schoolmates," Chris announced, "to the Computer Lab!" "Oooooooh, what fun," Tammi said to herself. "Oh, it's gonna be fun!" Chris responded, "But, before we get to that. Jeff!  Dude, bro, friend, choose a number between 1 and 11." Jeff looked at Chris, confused, "Why me.... and why eleven?" "Can we ever get through something without there being so many questions!? Just do it!" Chris said. "Okay, okay! Don't have a kid," Jeff told him, "Uhhh... 5?" Chris eyed the ceiling and screamed, looking up, "FIVE!" Everyone looked at each other with the same 'I don't know' expression. Ryan rolled his eyes, "Great. Now that we've played 'Let's All Be Idiots', can you tell us what--"  Again, Ryan was cut off. The door to the Computer Lab was opening, and Katherine walked into the room. Everyone immediately gasped. The camera panned to Jeff, who was smiling very hard. "The number is 5, so we've invi--" Chris was interrupted by Jeff, who stampeded and literally ran over Chris to get to Katherine. "Katherine!! You're back!" Jeff exclaimed, as they immediately began making out. A few of the contestants began groaning Chris stood up and wiped the dust off his shirt, "As I was saying... Yes, it's true! Katherine is officially back in this game!" "But, that's not fair!!" Ryan yelled out. "Neither is your social life," Chris threw back, "Anyway... Like the others from the merge, Katherine won't be competing in this challenge. Since she's a huge target of being voted out again on the episode the girl just came back in, she'll just get auto-immunity." Chris laughed, "Fun, huh?"

Ryan: Okay, you know what? That's it! FOUR people... returning to this trash Chris calls a reality show!? Ugh! It's time to take some action... (confessional cut off) Katherine: Do I hear a party coming on!? (laughs) Yes, I'm back! I don't really... know how.... but I'm back in it, baby! (laughs more and randomly gives the camera "the finger")

Ryan ran up to Chris and began poking his chest, "Why did you have to bring her back?! Why couldn't it have been.... Puck, or something?" "Okay, one... I think you're talking about Chuck." Chris said, pushing him to the ground, "And, two, that's like asking 'why haven't you been eliminated?'. We don't really know, it's confusing." At that point, Jeff, still hugging Katherine, walked in the camera's view, backwards, and back to where the others were. "As I was saying..." Chris began again, "..... what was I saying?" "Something about zee American computer?" Dedrek thought. "Oh, right. Your challenge today, should you choose to accept it, and you will if you know what's good for you, is a two-fer!  Firstly, since there's nine of you competing, I'll divide you into groups of 3, three apiece, and get your creative juices flowing.  I need you to think of a new, top of the line, 'sweeping the country'....-- and Burbank -- COMPUTER GAME!" Lilie gasped and began thinking.

Lilie: I come from a long line of businesspeople. Some of them have to be computer engineers. (points to her head) It's all in the noggin, right?

"The second challenge will be explained momentarily," Chris said, as he took out a piece of paper, "Now. The teams are:  Ariel, Dedrek, and Lilie..." Ariel and Dedrek high-fived each other as Lilie calmly rolled her eyes. "... Jeff, Nalyd, and Stefani...." The camera zoomed in on the three. Jeff was shaking his head 'yes', Nalyd shook his head 'no', and Stefani tried doing both by shaking her head in a circular motion. "... And, Ryan, Tammi, and Terry." Chris finished. Terry gasped, and ran over to the both of them. He put both Ryan and Tammi in his arms, "This is gonna be so awesome!" "Yeah, a real hoot," Tammi said, looking the other way. Ryan slapped Terry and walked off, "Get off of me, you skeeze!"

Ryan: So, right now... My alliance consists of Ariel, Tammi, (points to self) The King, and, probably the only two people that will stay faithful to me, Lilie and Terry. And, that's only because Terry's an idiot and Lilie's.......... Lilie. Either way, it doesn't matter if they stay faithful to me or not. In this game, you have to find ways to make sure you have useful people in your arsenal. I've accomplished that with these goons. The end is near, you fill in the blanks. There's a lot of 'em.............. Losers.

"Creating a new video game, eh?" Jeff said, as he looked over to Katherine next to Chris, "Why don't we Katherine a Katherine game about Katherine-ing a Katherine in danger in Katherinetown?" He turned back to his other teammates to see they were looking at him in awe. "......... What?" Nalyd said. "What, what?" "What.. did you just say?" "... I didn't say anything." "You just-- Ugh... Nevermind." "What about basketball?" Jeff suggested. Stefani looked up, "I think Chris said we have to be original." "Basketball's original." "No, Jeff, we need to think of the idea ourselves." "But, I did just think of it, dude," He made a picture frame with his hands, "... Basketball. It's amazing." "Jeff, no, it's.... It's.... Ugh.. Nevermind." Both Stefani and Nalyd were shaking their heads while Jeff had one eye closed looking through the square he made with his hands. The camera went over to Ariel, Dedrek, and Lilie.

"It's gotta be a game about the modern business world!" Lilie said to the two of them. "What? No way... We've gotta think of a game Chris will like," Dedrek assured her. "Chris should like that! Business is cool, interesting, entertaining, hip, and trendy right now!" "You left out 'boring'." "Ugh... What idea do you--" "Mime Makeover!!" Dedrek interrupted her, "It doesn't have to be all competitive, we can just have a game where zee joueur (the player) puts all kinds of paint on the mime and make him look tre (very) fab!" Lilie started again, "1. 'Mime Makeover'? Bad name.  2. Paint??  That's what's boring," she began laughing, "and 3. Did you just say the word 'fab'!? Hahahahahaha!" Ariel ignored the two of them and spoke out, "What about a modeling game? That's usually never done.  And, it'd be fun." "Modeling!?" Lilie struck back, "We're looking for games that Chris will like, not Tyra the mime! Business!" "Mimes!" "Modeling!" The three continued bickering as the camera went over to Ryan's team.

"Will the never-ending annoyances ever zip it?!" Ryan yelled to the three of them, "We're trying to think of a game here!" He pointed at Tammi, then at Terry, "Princess, Pauper, any ideas?" Terry gasped, "Princess! That gives me an idea!  'The Legend of Terry'!" Ryan and Tammi looked at each other, then said in unison, "What?" "Yeah. Yeah. Yeah," he began, "It starts off with little Terry who has to fight his way to rescue a princess! And, along the way, the evil 'Ryan' and 'Tammi' try stopping him everywhere!  Good, huh?" Terry looked at Ryan and Tammi, who were sinisterly eyeing him back.

Terry: Well, it sounded good to me. (sobs)

"It's obvious that the game should be about the undying romance between two people madly in love with each other." Tammi said, sighing, "Nalyd would love that." "Nalyd?" Ryan asked questioningly, with a grin on his face. "I MEAN.... Uhh... Anybody!" she said, shaking a bit. "Ohhhh, you love him, don't you?" Tammi began blushing, "Nooooo." She slapped Ryan at that point and walked back over to Terry, "What do you suggest?" "I don't know! You think of something!" Ryan said.

The camera went back to Nalyd's group. " 'Bagpipe Hero' !" Nalyd exclaimed. Jeff smacked his head, "You have got to be kidding." "Uhh... No?" Nalyd responded, "That's actually a good idea. You can see how skilled you are with the bagpipes and--"  Jeff and Stefani looked at him and listened to him drone on and on about Bagpipe Hero. "Blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah-blah!  Blah.  Blah, blah?  Blah?  Blahh!" Jeff and Stefani heard Nalyd say. At that point, Jeff whispered something in Stefani's ear while Nalyd was still talking. Stefani shook her head, smiling, as Jeff ran off-screen. "And, the final round, Bag Mania...," Nalyd was still preaching to them. Jeff came back up, ran past Stefani, and approached Nalyd and stuffed a paper bag on his head. Stefani began clapping as Nalyd yelled, "Hey! What gives?!" Jeff, now aided by Stefani, grabbed Nalyd and stuffed him under a table. "Basketball," the two said in unison about their computer game idea

Nalyd: (with the bag over his head) There's no respect.

Chris and Katherine finally came up in front of the three teams, "Techy teammates! You got my game ideas?" he said, proudly. The camera went over to Ariel, Dedrek, and Lilie, who were whistling and look in all different directions. Then, it panned to Ryan, Tammi, and Terry, who were all looking a bit bitter. The camera then panned over to Stefani and Jeff, who were smiling. "Sweetie, aren't you short one person?" Katherine said to Jeff, on Chris' side. "Uhh... Noooooooo," Jeff replied, winking. At that point, loud thumping noises were heard from an unknown place. "Riiiiiiight," Chris said, "Ignoring whatever that was, Ariel! Why don't you go first?  What's your team's game idea?" Ariel shook his head, "Why do we have to go first?" "Maybe it's because, I said so? Now, what do you have?" Ariel looked behind him at Lilie, who was looking at Dedrek, who was making mime motions and actions. Lilie sighed, "Mime Makeover." "Mime what?" Chris said, a bit weirded out. "Mime mak--" "No, no, no!! Don't say it again!  Just tell me what it's about." Dedrek walked up, "You get to--" Chris stopped him, "You know... Don't even explain it. I know that's going to be a failure, next team?" "You can't do that!" "I'm the host, remember. I can do whateverrrrrr I want.  Next team?  Uhh.... Ryan, Tammi, and Terry!" Tammi chuckled, walked up, and handed a paper to Chris. "What's on that paper?" Ryan whispered to Tammi. "Terry's idea." "Terry's idea?!" Ryan suddenly screamed, "We would have been better off asking Chris's bunion!!" Ryan gasped and covered his mouth, then looked at Terry, who, apparently, was in denial. "Awe, you don't mean that!" Terry said positively.

Ryan: Ew. Yes, I do! (scoffs)

"The Legend of Terry?" Chris said, after reading the paper. Terry shook his head, "Yeah, you like it?" Chris stayed silent, listening to Terry, but then went to the next team, not answering Terry, "Okay, Jeff, Stefani, and..... where's Nalyd?" "In the mansion," Jeff lied. "Oh. Okayyyy, then. Game idea?" Chris replied. "Basketball, bro!" "... Did you not hear a word I said earlier? Original, guys!  Original."

Jeff: Dudes! Basketball is original! I came up with it, didn't I?

"Well, with that ending, it seems I have no choice but to deem Ryan, Tammi, and Terry the winners," Chris declared. The three of them began cheering as the other five looked at them with disgust. Chris walked over to a rather tall blue box in the corner of the computer lab. "For your reward for winning the first challenge, Team Ryan-Tammi-Terry, you get this!!" Chris took the cover off the box to reveal a man of about 35 with a Hall Pass in his hand. "What, we get a Hall Pass with a man and his bad haircut attached with it?" Ryan smugly asked. Terry ran over and took the Hall Pass.

Terry: I'm surprised I could just do that. Yay for invincibility!! Easiest win ever!!

"You could say that. This is my brother, Ace.  He's... uhh... computer-savvy." Chris responded. Ariel raised his hand, "So, he's a nerd?" "Hey!!" Ace said, with the Hall Pass still in his hand. "Exactly!" Chris told Ariel, "And, you'd be lucky to have his nerd skills, because the second challenge is creating the winning video game, The Legend of Terry...... Since you techno-wads couldn't think of anything to beat that. Your team is allowed to only one computer here in the Computer Lab, and it's up to you to figure out how to make the game right here, with Terry's team getting an advantage of having my brother, Ace, here, help out with making the game for them on their computer.  The rest of you are on your own.  I'll judge, as usual, by playing all the games, and give invincibility to the team with the best one!  Hop to it, suckers!" Chris, then, went over to a computer monitor, downloaded a virus onto the CPU, causing the computer to explode in a fit of smoke. When the smoke was cleared, Chris was gone.

Ariel, Dedrek, and Lilie ran to a computer in the Lab. "Okay... How do we do this?!" Dedrek asked to the two of them. "How should I know?" Lilie told him. Ariel grabbed the seat for the computer and shoved Lilie and Dedrek out of the week and smiled, "Move aside, guys, it's Ariel-time!" Ariel immediately began rapidly putting in commands and hitting keys on the keyboard. Lilie and Dedrek watched in awe, with their mouths wide open at the speed he was going. "Done!!" Ariel said, showing Lilie and Dedrek the computer screen which said 'The Legend of Terry' and 'PRESS START' blinking near the bottom of the screen. "How on Earth did you do that?" Lilie wanted to know. Ariel lightly chuckled, "How can you not know how to do that?" Dedrek and Lilie looked at each other, then shrugged.

Ariel: It was simple. Either that, or it's the fact that I come from a line of computer engineers. (smiling) I forget which.

Ariel, Lilie, and Dedrek proudly walked past Jeff and Stefani and went to relax as the camera stopped on Jeff and Stefani. "Making a computer game...," Jeff mumbled. Jeff saw Ariel's team walk right past him, "You dudes are finished already?!?" "Duhh," Lilie said in a playful tone. Jeff put his head down on the computer table, "What are we gonna do now?" Stefani comforted Jeff, and, while doing so, noticed that Ariel's team left their computer unattended. She, then, noticed that there were USB Flash Drives in every computer in the Computer Lab. "Hmm.... Wait here," Stefani told Jeff as she snatched the Flash Drive out of her computer and went to Ariel's team's computer. After a few commands and quick thinking, she came back over to her and Jeff's computer, stuck the Flash drive in, and jumped. "Voila!" Stefani said, poking Jeff. Jeff rose up to see that the exact image that's on Ariel's computer was now on their computer. "Uh... Stef-dude, how did you--" Jeff started, as Stefani twirled the Flash drive around. They high-fived each other. "We got this!" she said positively. Jeff and Stefani, then, were about to leave to go join Lilie and the others until another loud thump was heard. Stefani spoke out, "Oh, crap! We almost forgot about Nalyd!" The both of them reached down to get the tight bag off of Nalyd's head. Nalyd, heavily breathing, yelled, "What the (bleep) was that for?!" "He's fine," Jeff assured. Stefani agreed, "Mhm." They, then, put the bag back over Nalyd's head and stuffed him under the table.

Jeff: (laughing uncontrollably) We are so... Stefani: (also laughing) BAD!

After restraining Nalyd, the two went over to join Ariel's team, proudly, as the camera went over to Ryan's group. "You guys are all done!?" Ryan asked. All five of them shook their heads 'yes'. At that point, Ryan quietly moved away from his team without Tammi, Terry, or any of the other team members knowing.

Ryan: In it to win it, like always. (shows a Flash drive with a small skull & crossbones symbol on it's front) They're going down!

"What they don't know," Ryan said, putting the Flash drive in Ariel's computer, "won't hurt 'em." At that point, Ariel's computer showed a skull and crossbones logo on its screen. To make sure Ariel's team wouldn't see it, he shut the computer down and creeped back over to his team.

Ryan: I'm really getting into this game.

"Okay, Jack," Ryan started. "It's Ace," Ace McLean told him. "Whatever. How do we do this?" "Okay, first thing's first, get a brain." "Right! I'll go get a-- Wait..... UGH!! Tell us what to do!" Ryan began eyeing Ace. Ace looked back at him, "Calm down, don't get your panties in a knot." Ace pushed Ryan down and began working.

Ryan: He's definitely Chris' brother, and he is so asking for i-- Hmm..... (Ryan ponders a thought as the confessional cut off)

"Are you ever going to be finished?!" Ryan rushed him. "Ryan, calm down." Terry weakly responded to him. Ryan looked at Terry and said in a sinister voice, "Don't. Tempt. Me. Right. Now." Terry made a small 'eep' noise as Ryan went back over to Ace. "Oh, I'll be done when you get a girl," Ace told him, "Oh, crap! That means it'll take about 50 years.  Oh, darn." Ryan began clenching his teeth as the other five that were already finished, who were listening, began stifling laughter. "Do you cretins have anything to say over there?!" Ryan snapped at them. "Nah," Ariel spoke for all of them. Dedrek whispered to the others, "Why don't you ask your girlfriend in about 50 years?" Everyone bursted out laughing. "UGH!" Ryan grunted, as he ran out of the school and into the mansion. "Almost finished, Ryan," Ace said, not noticing Ryan has left.

Tammi: This guy.... (stifling laughter).... is amazing!

"Hmm, I'm thirsty," Dedrek said out loud. "You know? I am, too, I'll be right back," Stefani said. Both Dedrek and Stefani stepped out of the room into the hallway to get a drink of water from a nearby fountain. At that point, back in the Computer Lab, Ace snapped his fingers. "Shoot. I need something to save this on.  It's too big to fit on this Flash drive." "You could... go into my room and find a CD or a computer chip.... or something," Tammi said, seductively. Confused, Ace agreed, "Uhh.... Okay, then."

Ace: .... She scares me.

The scene changed to Ace walking toward the mansion, to look for Tammi's room. He walked in, "Hello?!" After getting no response, he shrugged his shoulders and walked in. He could only get a few feet into the mansion where Ryan, behind him, knocked Ace out with a bat. Ace fell to the floor, and Ryan dropped the bat right next to him and ran back into the school.

Right when Ryan ran back in the Computer Lab, Chris was about to begin judging. "Let's get this computer train rollin', huh?" Chris said, walking over to Ariel, Dedrek, and Lilie's computer. Chris powered it on and saw nothing but a skull and crossbones symbol would come up. "Uhhh... What gives?" Chris said, pressing buttons on the computer, trying to make it work. "What do you mean? Ariel made the game, it should work properly," Lilie said in an astute manner. Chris gave up on the computer, "I'd say Ariel screwed you guys over because it looks like he added a virus in with the game. I can't view anything." Ryan gasped fake and loudly, "A virus!?!?!?! GASP!" "WHAT!?" Ariel yelled, "I didn't do that!" "Apparently, you did, that's a bust," Chris said, getting up and moving to Jeff's computer. Chris sat down and looked at Jeff's game. "Dang, you guys, this looks... pretty good," Chris remarked. When the rest of the schoolmates went over to see Jeff's screen, Ariel literally yelled out, "Hey, that's my game!!" "Yeah, right," Chris responded. "No, really, that is my game! Jeff, you thief!  You stole it!" Ariel sadly said. Lilie nodded her head at Chris. Chris put his hand on both Lilie and Ariel's mouths, "HOW!? Did he teleport it over here?!" he began laughing as he played Jeff's game "Uhh.... I didn't steal it," Jeff told him, putting emphasis on the 'I'. Ariel only looked at him sadly. Chris nodded his head, talking about the characters in the game, "Take that, 'Tammi'! Heh, Jeff, this is a rockin '  game!  You may actually have a shot at winning!" "Sweet, bro!" Jeff shouted. Chris hopped up and backflipped to Ryan, Tammi, and Terry's computer. "Guys, where's your game?" Chris said, eager to play it. "We're... uhh... waiting on your brother, Ace, to come back," Tammi declared. "He helped us with the game but he needed something to save it on, so he took it off the computer and went to the mansion to go find to save it on. He.... hasn't come back, and it's been about 10 minutes." Chris rolled his eyes, "Oh, the minor things." "MINOR?!" Tammi yelled, "Aren't you gonna ch--" At that moment, Ace came in, rubbing his head with one hand and carrying a bat with the  names 'Dedrek & Lilie' in big black, permanent marker letters. "Ughhh, who the heck is Lilie!?" Ace said, struggling. Lilie raised her hand, "I am." as Dedrek and Stefani came through the same door from getting water and talking. "And, who's Dedrek?" Ace wondered. "I am," Dedrek said, literally behind Ace. "Explain this!" Ace said, as Lilie and the rest of the schoolmates went over to Dedrek, Stefani, and Ace.

"Zat must be Lilie's. I've never seen that piece of wood before," Dedrek admitted. "What?! Me!? It's not mine!" Lilie assured him. Ace told the two of them, "Well, whoever's bat this is, it was used to knock me out in the mansion a few minutes a-- Chris interrupted, "You know, I hate to interrupt this shocking episode of 'The Young & the Brainless', but I do have a show to host. Jeff, Stefani, and Nalyd.... wherever he is.... you all win the challenge!!" The two of them began cheering as multiple thumps were heard. "Everyone, go take a vote! It's time for a vote-off for the ages!" Chris announced. Ace eyed Lilie and Dedrek who looked at Ariel, who looked to Ryan for protection, who was only grinning evilly.

Ryan: You know how I said I'm running this game! Yeah... Yeah, well, I'm the puppetmaster now!! (evil, crazy laughter)

At the Detention Hall Ceremony, everyone was present and locked in a vote for Chris. Right then, a small monitor rose from inside the floor upward. "What's that?" Tammi asked. "Oh, just a little something I like to call.... 'Your Votes'!" Chris said, enthusiastically, "I haven't done this in so long, and it would give me so much joy to do it now! Let's watch and see who's gettin' the boots!!" "Boots?" Ryan said, putting emphasis on the 's'. "Yes, Ryan, boots. We've got a surprise double elimination coming up here!" Chris yelled. Everyone began gasping and talking amongst themselves as the confessionals played.

Jeff: Ryan came up to me today and asked for me to vote out Dedrek. I don't know why, but..... I vote for him. Lilie: Ariel, it's all your fault that we lost that challenge! I thought you knew what you were doing! Guess I know better than to trust little tykes, now. (scoffs) Tammi: Lilie! Lilie! Lilie! Lilie! She hit Mr. Hotti-- ACE.... in the head with that bat! I know it was her! (grumbles) Nalyd: (still in paper bag, only mumbling was heard through the bag) Ryan: Today's voting is actually kind of hard. But, only because there's so many people to choose from. Ariel bombed the challenge, (air quotes) "Dedrek and Lilie" beat Ace down, Tammi's still her annoying self, she's falling for Nalyd, which could be a distraction and reason to boot him out, and Terry's still the idiot he was from Day One. Hmm.... Einey, Meiney, Miney.... Ariel. (chuckles) Listen to me, I sound just like Heather. (chuckles again) At least she'd put up a fight. Hmm... I wonder if Ace will ever find out that I knocked him out. Meh, doubtful, he's too stupid to figure it out. (scoffs) Telling me to get a brain. He's got a lotta nerve. (flashed the skull and crossbones Flash drive) Can't forget about this baby. (kisses it) Terry: Ryan said he was voting for Ariel, but he told me to vote for Dedrek. (shrugs) Whatevs, I vote for Frenchy! Ariel: I vote for Tammi, but only because I'm not getting rid of Dedrek or Lilie just yet, and the fact that... she's just downright mean! Dedrek: Now, I'm in hot water. Thanks a lot, Ace. I didn't even do anything to you! I choose Tammi. Get her out of here! Stefani: I vote for Ariel. I feel a little bad, if he gets eliminated, anyone can kinda say I caused it. (5-second pause) Ah, well! Katherine: My first voting in a while!! It's been so long! Me and Jeff were talking earlier today, and he said he's voting out Dee Dee. Ordinarily, I'd vote for myself in a situation like this since I can't go home right now, but I'm stickin' with my honey bear. So long, French boy! (blows a kiss to the confessional camera)

"Well, lots of stuff revealed there," Chris said. "Golden A+'s to Ryan..." he threw the Golden A+ at Nalyd, as it hit Nalyd's bag. Nalyd's body, then, fell over after being hit. "... Stefani, Katherine, Jeff, Nalyd, Terry..." Chris threw the Golden A+'s respectively again. "With one vote against her, Lilie is still safe," Chris said, throwing the 'A'. "And, finally, with two votes against her, Tammi is still safe," Chris threw the final Golden A+ at her. "Ariel, Dedrek, it seems... you two have been eliminated." "This isn't fair!" the both of them said out in unison. Ariel screamed, "Ryan sabotaged our game!" Dedrek yelled also, "Oui, oui! (Yes, yes!) And, he framed me with the Ace ordeal!" "Can someone get these crybabies out of here!?" Chris yelled, as interns literally threw Dedrek and Ariel out of the D-Hall room and the school, in general. "Nice work, Ryan," Tammi said to him, back in the classroom.

Tammi: That was so stupid!! RYAN sabotaged one of our own alliance members! What the heck!? Ryan: Ugh... This is starting to get a bit boring, actually. And, to those that have been paying attention to every detail and about what I just did, all will be explained as soon as possible...... or when I feel like it, I could care less about telling you. I know what I'm doing and that's all that matters. (winks)

Chris leaves the D-Hall Room and goes outside the school, "So, we've gained Crazy Lady and lost Mr. Nice and Mr. Oui (Yes). I'm surprised.  Very surprised.  And, I don't say that often.  We were at 9, then we went up to 10, and now we're down to 8.  Find out what happens to them all next time on Total.... Drama.... 1-0-1!!" The voice from 'AOL Messaging' was then heard saying 'Goodbye' as the screen faded to black.

Chapter Seventeen: Horror-culture - The Jupiter Snare
Chris stood outside of Gilded Glory as usual for his introduction, "Oh, my gosh, last time on Total Drama 101.... The school went to Computer Camp! The Final Nine divided into groups of three and had to think of a new, 'it's-in, it's-now'-type of computer game that I would enjoy and actually make the game.  But, before we did any of that... we had a special surprise for Jeff.  Yes, that's right!  Katherine returned to the competition!  Why?  I don't know, the producers just told me that Katherine was coming back, so ask them!  Since she returned last episode, she didn't compete in the challenge and was automatically invincible.  Come to think of it, everyone probably could have used her help because the first challenge, brainstorming, sucked!  I had no choice but to give this suckish prototype game, 'The Legend of Terry', the win.  After winning, Terry's team of himself, Ryan, and Tammi got the reward of having help from my stuck-up brother Ace in making the computer game, much to the disdain of Ariel's team of himself, Dedrek, and Lilie and Jeff's team of himself, Nalyd, and Stefani. I love my brother. We finally have something in common, we both hate Ryan!" Chris chuckled, "Anyway, this hatred led up to Ryan's anger with Ace. So much anger that he killed two birds with one stone! He knocked out Ace with a bat that allegedly belonged to Dedrek or Lilie, causing a framing to take place! Anyway, you should have seen the episode, there's too much to explain! Ariel bombed the challenge, thanks to Ryan, and Dedrek and Lilie were framed, thanks to Ryan. Eliminations? Yes, you heard me.... again. Eliminationsssssssssssss. Dedrek and Ariel were eliminated due to Ryan's sabotaging in that episode. With Katherine back in the game and Ariel and Dedrek out, we're down to our Final Eight! It's a plant's life today, right here, on Total... Drama.... 1-0-1!!"

After the theme song, the camera showed Tammi running around in the mansion towards a confessional.

Tammi: (breathing heavily) The sky, the ground, on my left, on my right, in everyone's face... (sobs) I see Nalyd everywhere!! (sighs) I can't fight this any longer. I'm in love with Nalyd. (confessional cut off)

Tammi exited the confessional only to find that Katherine was standing right outside of it. "Uhh... What are you doing?" Tammi said to her. "Mmm... Just-uhh.... Hangin' around." "Okay, then?" "Yep." "... Freak," Tammi said under her breath as she walked off. Katherine waited until she saw Tammi enter her own room. As Tammi slammed her door, she dashed into Jeff's room. "Jeff! Jeff! Jeff!" she screamed, closing his door, "You are not gonna believe this!!" Katherine went over to Jeff's ear and whispered something to him. "What?! No way, man," Jeff told her. "Yes, way! I heard her myself! This is amazing!" "Wow," Jeff said, laughing. Katherine gave him a kiss and began to exit the room, "Don't tell anyone, though, heh." She closed the door, leaving Jeff to think.

At that point, montage music came on as the viewer saw many quick scenes. Jeff ran outside the mansion and found Stefani. He ran over to her and whispered something in her ear. Stefani began bouncing up and down hyper-actively and ran off-screen.

Stefani bounced into the mansion and into Lilie's room, literally running her over. While both were on the ground, Stefani whispered something in her ear. Lilie made a gasping motion. She, then, tried to run out of her room but Stefani went after her, trying to leave first. And, obviously, the two of them got stuck in Lilie's doorway.

Lilie ran over to the school's cafeteria to find Terry playing around. Lilie grabbed his head and pulled his ear near her mouth. She began whispering to Terry, and Terry was seen making 'ew' motions, as he ran out of the cafeteria.

The scene changed again to show Terry sneaking around and finally reaching Ryan, in the Master Bedroom with a face mask on. Terry goes on his bed and whispers something in his ear. The montage music stopped as Ryan yelled, "Whaaaaaaaaaaaat!?" "It's true," Terry said to him, confidently.

 Featured Quote:  Ryan: How the (bleep) can Tammi say she loves Nalyd, wants to go steady with him, get married to him, move to Brazil, then to Japan, and have 19 kids!? How is that possible?! (scoffs) Relationships are nothing but mindless distractions, and I'm not having any distractions with any of my alliance members!

Ryan quickly ran into the Master Bedroom's bathroom. At that point, the shower turned on, unusually, by itself. Ryan literally gasped. "What the heck?" he mouthed, but didn't audibly say. He moved the shower curtains out of the way to see Nalyd, butt-naked, about to take one. The both of them screamed at each other. "Get out!!" Nalyd said, grabbing the shower curtain to protect himself. "With pleasure! But I need to talk to you, whether you like it or not!" Ryan said, running out of the bathroom.

As Ryan began running downstairs from the foyer, Chris came on the intercom. "All schoolmates, please report to Room 114 for your next challenge. Please report to Room 114 for your next challenge........ That is all." he said in a monotone voice. "Hold it, Chris, there's too many things going on!" Ryan shouted to the ceiling. "And, I should care about that why?" "WHOA! You could hear us this whole time?!" "Uh... Nooooooo?" "... Ugh."

The Final Eight were in Room 114 with Chris and Chef Hatchet. Chef Hatchet was in his usual chef uniform standing behind eight huge items, all covered by sheets and Chris was wearing a sunflower helmet, where his face was seen in the middle of the sunflower. "Welcome, Fin--" Chris was interrupted by the Final Eight, laughing at Chris' sunflower helmet. Lilie wiped a tear from her eye, "What idiot gave you that thing?!" "Quiet!" Chris announced, "This is all supposed to help you with figuring out what today's challenge is." "Dressing up like wannabe-plants?!" Lilie said, falling out, laughing more. "Since when is she funny!? That was cornier than my grandma's right foot!" Chris snapped back at her, "Anyway, today's subject is Horticulture, future plant-lovers!" Chris waved his hand to Chef and Chef Hatchet immediately began uncovering the items. It was revealed that 8 mutated and huge Venus Flytraps. The Final Eight looked up as their jaws dropped over the sight. Chris began, "These.... are Ve--" "What the heck are those?!" Jeff yelled out. Chris smacked his head and shook it. "As I was saying," Chris tried to start again, "these are Venus Flytraps. They are--" "What are those?" Katherine snuck in. Chris became angry, "Can you guys let me get a word out?!" "Then say something, ya silly goose-y woose-y!" Katherine told him. Chris waited a few seconds to penetrate what Katherine just said. "Annnnnnnnyway," Chris reiterated, "A Venus Flytrap is a life-like plant that eats little insects and flies," Chris showed the schoolmates a picture of a real Venus Flytrap, "They're notoriously small, and really get full off of the insects. When an insect in that pink area there, those two little clamps close down and the plant literally eats the insect, because, when the clamps re-open, the little bugger is gone!" "Those mini-trees over there," Ryan yelled, pointing at the plants where Chef was, "are not Venus Flytraps! Those things are almost bigger than us!" Chris stopped Ryan from talking, "Correction #1: Those things are bigger than you. And, correction #2: I was getting to that!  Those are mutated, and I'd like to call them..... uhh....... Jupiterrrr.... Snares!" "How original," Lilie told him. "What are we going to be doing with these things?!" Terry said, happily. Chris took out some weed spray, "Why... Killing them, of course!" Everyone began gasping.

Terry: (sobbing, referring to the Jupiter Snares) Those poor, unfortunate...... thingies!! Ryan: This... should be interesting. Lilie: (dialing a number with a cellphone) Easy. As..... Uhh... (puts the phone on her ear) Something-that's-easy.

"Your task today is to find a way to kill these plants.... before they try to find a way to kill you!" Chris told them. "Those things really won't.. k-k-kill us, will they?" Terry asked. Chris went over and petted Terry, "Do you really think I'd allow these things to kill you?"

Jeff, Katherine, Lilie, Nalyd, Ryan, Stefani, Tammi, and Terry: (in an 8-way split-screen confessional) Uhhh... Duh!!

"Anyway, you can do or use whatever you can find to kill those things, but they won't go down without a fight. First one dead wins the challenge!  Everyone else, you're up for a green elimination!" Chris told them, "Get to it!"

Scenes switched to show Tammi in front of one of the Jupiter Snares. She rolled her eyes and scoffed.

Tammi: Look. I'm in a powerful alliance right now. I could care less about winning some stupid challenge at the moment. Plus, Chris did a terrible job with explaining it to us. I have more important matters to attend to.

Tammi inched closer and closer to Nalyd and his plant. "Prepare to die!!" Nalyd said, pulling out a water bottle from his pants, "Chaaaaaaaaaaaaaarge!" Nalyd ran toward his plant, and away from Tammi. Nalyd doused his plant with water, causing it, of course, to grow. Nalyd's plant growled in it face. Over-scared of the growl, Nalyd fainted. "Nalyd!" Tammi said, running to his aide. Ryan turned around and saw this. "Tammi, get back to work!" Ryan yelled at her, "If I don't win this, you better!" Ryan turned around again to face his plant while having his fists up and bouncing. "C'mon, let's do this!" Ryan said, literally to his plant. "Don't kill me!" Ryan's plant said, causing Ryan's eyes to get wide. Ryan cocked an eyebrow, "Did you just say something?" "Well, it wasn't Jimmy Be Goodie, was it?!" the plant snapped back him. Ryan literally ran away from the plant, screaming along the way, to Chris, who was talking to Chef at the time Ryan came charging up to him. "What kind of sick, twisted game are you running here!? That plant can talk!!" Ryan growled to Chris, pointing at his plant. Chris shook his head, "Ryan, those plants may be mutated, but they can't say anything." "Yes, it could!" "Noooooo, it can't." "C'mon! I'll show you!" Ryan literally grabbed Chris' chest and threw him near his own plant. The plant said nothing. Ryan became arrogant, "Well, what are you waiting for, you glorified salad?! Say something!" The plant remained quiet. "Now, Ryan, I know you're crazy, but... I'm more than sure you're not this crazy," Chris smart-alecly remarked. "What?!" Ryan grumbled, menacingly, "I'm not crazy!" "Riiiiight. Well, why don't you just kill the thing like you're supposed to and maybe it won't 'talk'?" Chris asked, putting air quotes around the word 'talk'. He, then, walked off. Ryan sat down on the ground next to the seemingly lifeless plant, "This is stupid! I'm not crazy!" "Yeah, ya are," Ryan's plant corrected him. Ryan screamed again as the camera went to Jeff and Katherine.

The two of them high-fived each other, after agreeing on a plan and looked at their plants, both right next to each other. Jeff ran up to his plant, jumped up, and got ready to kick it, when his plant's vines came out. Jeff's plant caught him in mid air with it's vines, thwarting his attempts. "Hmm," Katherine thought. She, then, front-flipped, jumped out also, and came cycling down about to hit her plant with her fist. This worked, but when Katherine's fist made contact with her plant, a large clanging noise was heard. "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!" Katherine screamed, holding her injured fist. Chris then, popped up out of nowhere, "Oh, and these plants may or may not have strong steel-type shields for bodies. Just lettin' ya know!" He then zipped back out.

Katherine: (with bandages on one of her hands) A little too late, ya think?! Ugh!! (slams injured hand on table in confessional, screams in pain) Yeeeeeeeeeeowwwwwwwwwwwww- (confessional cut off)

While Katherine was tending to her wound, Terry ran past the camera's view, looking like he was really about to do something. He ran up to his plant and stopped. He began a slap-fight with the plant's vines. Terry's plant 'grew tired' of playing the game, picked Terry up by his feet and threw him off-screen. "Still hangin' like a bat over hereeeeeeee," Jeff said, right before Terry's impact on Jeff cut him down from his own plant's vine. Jeff hit the floor, "Ohh.. Thanks, little man," Jeff put his hand on Terry's shoulder. "N-n-n-no problem," Terry said, looking hurt.

Back over with at Tammi & Nalyd's area, Nalyd was still knocked out and Tammi was still fighting off her plant, as well as, trying to get Nalyd to come to. "Nalyd... Wake up!!" Tammi said, shielding herself with a trash can lid from her plant's vines. Nalyd remained lifeless. Ryan got punched by his plant off-screen and slid on-screen next to Nalyd, "Nalyd, get up!! Actually.......... Nevermind, stay like you are.  One less person to deal with!" Ryan ran back up to his plant, "Get some!" "You want some more!?" Ryan's plant said in Ryan's mind. "Stop talking!!" Tammi looked over to Ryan, while fending herself, "Ryan, your plant isn't talking." "Yes. It. Is!" Ryan scolded her, sounding a bit crazy with his tone of voice.

Ryan: (shaking, hair all over the place) That thing knows how to talk. It-it-it... it does. (shakes the camera of the confessional) You believe me, right........... RIGHT!?!?!?!?!

The scene switched, again, to Lilie, facing her plant. "Okay," she started, "I don't like you, you don't like me. So, to make sure we don't see each other, I've hired some.... help." At that point, many men in black stormed into the Horticulture room. "Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go!" the leader of the men chanted, as they ran to Lilie's plant. "Get 'im!" Lilie yelled to the men. Lilie's men swarmed her plant and began using everything known to man to kill the plant. One used alcohol, another made the plant swallow a deathly pill to no avail, one tried punching the plant only to have his own fist injured, like Katherine's. "Fight, fight, fight!!" Lilie cheered on her hired professionals. Lilie's plant seemed to have gotten mad. At that point, it used one of it's vines and slapped all of Lilie's hired help towards Lilie. They all crashed on top of her. "Get off of me!" she grumbled under them. Right then, a watch alarm began beeping. One of the hired professionals said to Lilie, "Oh, I'm sorry, your 5 minutes are up." The men in black literally got up from the pile and walked out of the Horticulture room like nothing happened. Lilie got up, also, and saw them leaving, "Hey! Don't leave!! Get back here, you skanks!!  Ugh!" Lilie stormed off in Ryan's direction, who was, now, in the corner of a room, in fetal position.

"Ryan, are you okay?" Lilie said to him. Ryan was repeatedly hitting the wall with his body. "..... ng plants," he muttered. "What?" "... king plants." "Who's King Plants?" Ryan, then, snapped and grabbed Lilie's shirt, "THE PLANTS, MAN! THE PLANTS!!  THEY'S KNOW, MAN!  THEY'S GOT EARS!  THEY CAN TALK, THEY GOT MOUTHS, MAN!! I SEEN SOM' THINGS, MAN!! SOME THINGY-THINGS!! I'MMA GET THE SHAKES AT NIGHT!! THEM SHAKES, MAN! THEM SHAKES!!!!!" He, then, passed out in front of her. "Medic!" Lilie yelled, walking past him.

Later on, Stefani, bouncing everywhere, eyed her plant. "Let's dance," she said softly. Her plant tried to capture Stefani with it's vines, but Stefani dashed to the left. Her plant tried again, but she dashed to the right. Right then, she began pulling out random things from her pockets and throwing them to the ground. "Ball? No. Spatula? No. Accordion? No. Anchor? No. Knife? Hmm.......... No, it wouldn't be right. Aha!!  Weed spray!" she said in one breath. She began charging her plant, spraying the liquid alongside the plant. She ran in circles at almost light speed, spraying the plant along the way. Stefani's plant actually began lowering itself to the ground.

While Stefani was doing that, Tammi was still in peril. "Ugh.. I guess I have no choice," she finally said, "Nalyd, wake up!! Please?!.......... I LOVE YOU!!" And, wouldn't ya know it, the passed out Nalyd emerged from his slumber. "It's plant-time," he said to himself.

Chris, then, came into the picture, "A little too late, I may add." "What, how?" Nalyd asked. Chris pointed over to Stefani, the camera panned back to her to see Stefani literally beating her (now yellowish-brown) plant with the weed spray container after she ran out. "I'm pretty sure that plant's dead!" Chris screamed over to Stefani. "Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die! Die!" she screamed, pummeling the plant each time she said the word. Chris went over and grabbed Stefani to restrain her, as Stefani tried to release herself. "And, Stefani is the winner of this challenge, baby!!" Chris yelled. "Whoop! Whoop! Whoop!" Stefani weirdly chanted. She found a way to get out of Chris's grip and ran over to the other plants, injuring them quickly with her empty container of weed spray.

"Can someone please get her?!" Chris yelled out. He then looked over to Ryan, passed out. He picked up Ryan and whispered in his ear, knowing that Ryan couldn't hear him, "Uhh... I forgot to mention that today's a non-elimination challenge. Oopsies." Ryan only snorted, still cooling off from his spaz.

"While we attend to our injured, hurt, and.... sugar-rushed schoolmates," Chris began, still holding Ryan, "you be sure to think about this stuff. Will Nalyd and Tammi ever officially become a couple?!  Ew.  Will Stefani ever turn into a normal person!?  And... Will Ryan ever wake up from this weird trance he's in right now.  Let's..... hope not.  After this weird episode, all the answers will probably not be answered on the next episode of Total... Drama... 1-0-1!!" "DIE!!" Stefani said, suddenly appearing in front of the camera. She, then, knocked the camera out of the cameraman's hands, where the viewer could only see Chris's feet. "Can someone puh-lease control that mini-beast?!" Chris yelled, as the screen faded to black.

Chapter Eighteen: I'm Bringin' Sex Ed Back
Standing outside of Gilded Glory, Chris did his usual recap, "Last time on Total Drama 101. Let's see.  Schoolmates had to go to Horticulture class, which, really, was just a big fancy word for 'plant school'.  But, these were no ordinary plants.  I called them.... Jupiter Snares.  They're like GIGANTIC Venus Flytraps, one of the rocking-est plants on the face of the world!  Anyway, the challenge was to kill the plants, and that didn't work out so well.  Hmm.... Well, Jeff was 'hangin' out' the entire time, Katherine went full on karate mode, Lilie actually... hired some help.  And, by help, I mean ugly men in black.  Didn't work, heh.  Nalyd was knocked out the entire time.  Tammi, who told us the best secret ever, was trying to wake Nalyd up the entire time.  And, Terry....... did nothing.  One of the highlights of the episode was Ryan and Stefani's apparent sugar rush.  I'm still a bit scared of Ryan. He went full-on demented on all of us! And, somehow, a hyperactive Stefani won the challenge with her.... weed.... spray.... container. I dunno, you had to be there to see all the craziness that went down there. Anyway, since that was a non-elimination episode, we're still at the Final Eight, and something's telling this week is going to be very interesting right here on Total... Drama.... 1-0-1!!"

After the theme song, the camera zoomed in on the mansion the Final Eight were staying in. It was morningtime, and most of the Final Eight were still sleeping. Katherine was seen walking in the foyer and entered Tammi's room. "Girl, do you have an extra blanke--" she stopped at gasped at the site of Tammi's bed. Tammi was seen snoring away with Nalyd, to the right of her, with his arm around her body.

Katherine: It was sooooo cute! But, also a little strange. (giggles) Nalyd's a pla-yah!

Katherine randomly took a camera out from her pocket and snapped a picture of the two of them. "This will be perfect to show my grandchildren how to get some," she sighed longingly, and left the room. Later on, Tammi woke up and stretched. She, then, opened her eyes fully to see Nalyd on her side "Yaaaaaah!" she screeched, waking him up, causing him to yell also. "When I said 'I love you' last week, that was no excuse for you to turn into a nerdy version of a wannabe Hugh Hefner!" Tammi scolded him. Nalyd looked over to her, "Me?! You're the one who was moaning and tossing and turning everywhere last night!  I thought you enjoyed me being in here!" "You..... were awake the whole time!? And, you didn't wake me up!?" "Uhh... No? I was sleeping in the same bed with a girl, you really think I was gonna risk losing that?!" Tammi fiercely slapped him. "Hey!" Lilie yelled, opening Tammi's door, "Keep it down in here! Some of us are putting our faces on right now!" Tammi and Nalyd looked back over to Lilie to see that she had disgusting yellow cream on her entire face with cucumber slices covering her eyes. Nalyd jumped into Tammi's arms through fear of looking at Lilie. Lilie slammed the door shut as Tammi dropped Nalyd from her hands.

Tammi: I swear, I've never met a more (naming things off as she counts them on her fingers) inconsiderate, careless, selfish... Nalyd: She soooooo wants me... Tammi: (still counting on fingers) ... stupid, unappealing, self-centered.... Nalyd: You heard her, right? She said 'I love you' to me......... TWICE. (sighs lovingly) Tammi: (using toes to count) ... thoughtless, goofy, idiotic, ludicrous.... Nalyd: Won't be long until we're together in a condo on Toronto. (smiles) Tammi: (naming more things as she counts the threads in her shirt) ... unreasonable, tacky, foolish, dim-witted, mental, nutty, unscrupulous... Nalyd: She's awesome. Tammi: (now counting strands of hair) ... egotistical, irksome, big, philandering poop-head!!

Katherine, then, began beating on the confessional door, "'Ey! Has your nose hit the camera lens yet?! Because you've been lying in there an awful long time! Can I have a go in it now?!"

Tammi: (sighs and leaves)

Elsewhere, Jeff and Terry were talking in the cafeteria, but not eating. "So, an alliance member," Jeff said to Terry. "Huh? Oh! Yeah.  I'm in Ryan's." Terry responded. "Do you ever get the feeling that he's playing you?" "Noooo. Not really. Ryan's my friend." "Suuuuuure," Jeff sarcastically told him, as Ryan came into the cafeteria, "Oh, speak of the enemy." Ryan looked at Jeff, "What was that?" "Hm? Oh, I said... uhh... 'I'm really hungry'." "Ugh... I'm thirsty. Terry, go find me some Gilded Glory Tea." "Yes, sir!" Terry yelled, running into the kitchen part of the school cafeteria.

Jeff: Psh. Yeah.... Some friend.

Terry came back with a cup, as the remaining of the Final Eight, except Stefani, entered the cafeteria. "Here ya go," Terry said to Ryan, giving him the cup. Ryan tasted it and literally spit it out in Terry's face and threw the semi-full cup at the crotch area of his pants. "I said 'get me tea', not whatever that crap was!" Ryan growled. "It was tea!" "Well, it didn't taste like it! Go get me some more!" Lilie came in, looking at Terry with a fake sad face, "Awe, Terry, did you wet yourself..... again?" "I--" Ryan interrupted Terry. "Ohhhhh, yeahhhh. Tragic accident," Ryan added, covering Terry's mouth, "In fact, he was on his way to change and get me some tea.  Hurry along, Terry." Terry shook his head and mumbled under Ryan's hand and was about to leave. That is, until Chris came into the cafeteria.

"Good morning, my schoolmates!" Chris announced. "What's so good about it?" Ryan scoffed. "Anyway," Chris said, ignoring Ryan, "Ready for the next challenge?" "I'm not going to be ignored, answer my question!" "... I thought it was rhetorical." "It was!" "Then, why did you want me to answer it?" "Because it-- You-- I-- He-- It-- I dunno, okay?!" "Dudes, I think the craziness from last week is still lingering around right now with him," Chris said, laughing. Ryan scoffed as everyone else covered their mouths from laughing. Chris added, "Maybe he won't be suited for today's challenge." "What is today's challenge?" Lilie wondered. "Well, the subject is..... sex education!" Chris announced. "OH, YEAH!!" Stefani yelled, entering the room completely naked. Stefani looked around, and bow-leggedly walked into the cafeteria, "Hey... Th-th-this isn't the backyard."

Terry: (rolling his eyes) She's loopy again. It's getting kinda old. Yet............. (grabs collar) somewhat hot.

"Stefani! Go put some clothes on!" Chris yelled at her. Stefani immediately left the cafeteria, and, a couple minutes later, came back wearing nothing but Post-It Notes on her breasts and another between her legs. "That'll do!!!!" Terry yelled. "Someone, point me to the DJ!!!" she randomly yelled back. Jeff went up to Chris, "This is still a kids' show, isn't it?!" "That's right," Chris said, smiling. "And... You're really gonna let her wear just that!?" "... That's right." "SWEET!" "Alright!" Chris said, "If you didn't hear me earlier, and if you can't tell by Stefani's... uh... clothing, today's challenge is Sex Education, where you'll learn all about the human body and human reproduction!"

Jeff: Uhm.... (yells) Still a kids' show, dudes! Katherine: Sex education? Really? (scoffs) I'm sure I've seen it all before. (rolls eyes) This is gonna be boring. Lilie: This is not what a future businessperson should be learning about. I probably already know this, anyway! Ugh! Nalyd: (sweating) This is going to be sooooooo amazing. Ryan: (stares at the confessional camera with a cocked eyebrow) Really, people? Stefani: (singing, still semi-naked) ... And, IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-eee-IIIIIIIIIIIIII will always love youuuuuuuuuu-oooooh-oooh!! (falls out of chair) Tammi: As if Terry's mind wasn't demented enough, now we're putting sex into it. Terry: Whooooo!! Whoo!! Whoooooooooo!! Whoooooo!! Whoooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!! (hyperventilates)

The scenes switched to everyone in the Sex Education room. In the room, on the left, there were eight white chairs with buzzer devices in front of them. On the right, there were eight more chairs, four blue and four pink near the front of the room. "You guys ready for this!?" Chris declared, "There are eight of you, so I'm dividing you into pairs of two later. We're going to have a McLean 2010 Sex Tourney!" "We're all gonna knock each other up?!" Jeff yelled, as he grabbed Katherine and dipped her, "That should be fun." "No, Jeff," Chris told him, "Wait a few years for that, bro. But, we are legally able to show you that." Lilie gasped, "You mean.... (bleep)?" "Wow, you guys are frisky! No, not (bleep).  Just listen up.  We have two challenges today.  The first one is sexual trivia, and I'll get to explaining the second one, later.  But, back to the first one.  You're all to sit in one of those chairs and listen to the... very sexual questions I have for you.  For every question you get right, you get a point, if you get the question wrong, which I hope you don't, you are locked out of the game until the next question.  At the end of the game, the schoolmate with the most amount of points will receive the coveted Hall Pass and an advantage in the next challenge.  Everyone, man your positions and get ready!" Everyone went to the left of the room and sat down in one of the chairs and manned their buzzers. Everyone was sitting in alphabetical order except for Ryan and Tammi, who were sitting in each other's chairs (making the order Jeff, Katherine, Lilie, Nalyd, Tammi, Stefani, Ryan, and Terry).

Ryan: So, here's the deal. After the episode I had last week, I really need to redeem myself. I have a plan today that will get rid of a little dead-weight. I just need to make sure I stay safe, so I have to win this challenge. It's Sex Ed, and I really don't know much about that. So, I'll have to..... improvise.

"Are we all ready!?" Chris announced, getting out his question note-cards. "Yes!" everyone said in unison. Stefani, still wearing hardly anything shouted, "Arriba! (Up!)" "Alright then, let's begin!" Chris announced, "Name for the male reproductive organ?" Stefani buzzed in, "Ryan!!" "Hey!" Ryan growled and ultimately slapped her. " ' Ey!! You don't hit a girl, you (bleep)!" Stefani yelled, looking in the opposite direction of where Ryan was. "The penis?" Nalyd questioned after buzzing in. Chris shook his head, "Correct!! Of course Nalyd would know that." Everyone began chuckling.

Nalyd: Was that a gay joke!? Anyone would know that!

"Female reproductive organ?" Chris asked. Katherine buzzed in, "Vajoojoo, duh!" "Judges?!" Chris yelled off-screen. At that moment, a random dinging noise was heard, "We'll accept it!" Chris ran up to Stefani and pointed to her bare bosoms, "Random Two Point Question! Someone tell me what these are!" Terry buzzed in, looking at the objects. "Yes, Terry?" Chris asked. Terry remained silent and continued to stare at Stefani. "Terryyyyyyyy?" "Huh!? Oh, I--" "Answer it, you boob!" Ryan yelled in his face. Chris clapped, "That is absolutely correct!" "It's also absolutely not fair!" Terry cried. Ryan snorted, "If you weren't looking at those mounds, you could have answered it." He began smiling as Terry began looking sad.

"Hmm," Chris said, looking at his next question, "And, that ends the first round! After Round One, Ryan leads with 2 points, and Katherine & Nalyd are tied in second place with 1.  Round Two!  Everything's doubled!  First two questions are worth 2 points and the third one is worth 4.  Any questions?!" Lilie began to say something, "Chris, I don't really feel comfortable with t--" "No questions!? Good!" Chris interrupted her. Lilie scoffed and sat back.

"You guys know what spooning is, right? You know... when you cuddle with someone for a long, longgggg time with someone you really like." Chris said, pulling out a picture, "Kinda like this secret picture I have, belonging to Katherine, of Nalyd and Tammi... spooning, heh." Both Nalyd and Tammi gasped. "Where did you get that picture?!" they both said to Katherine in unison. Katherine smiled, "I went into your room last night! I, like, totally needed a blanket, and I saw you and Romeo over there cuddling, and I just had to snap it!" Tammi ran up to Chris, "Gimme that picture!" "Nah, it's Katherine's! Ask her!" Tammi growled at Chris as Nalyd went over to Katherine. "I'll trade you 5 points for that picture," Nalyd whispered. Katherine gasped, "Oooh, deal!" "Give it up!" Tammi yelled at him. "Woop!" Chris mumbled, sliding the picture into Tammi's hands.

Katherine: She can have that one. (pulls out a giant stack of copied pictures) I already have a... few more. The Vancouver Newspaper will love this! (giggles)

"Nalyd, you do know you have, like, negative four points now, right? That Hall Pass is... nowhere near your reach now," Chris informed him. "Better than you having that picture of my lover.... uh... my Tammi! UHH!  I mean, just Tammi!  Tammi.  Yeah, that's good," Nalyd stumbled. "OMG, can you guys just admit the obvious!?" Chris blurted out. "I know, Chef knows, the interns know. Heck, even Ryan knows!" "You know, I'm really getting tired of your 'Dumb Ryan' comments, make-up boy!" Ryan scoffed at Chris. "You know what? So am I." "No, you're not!" "Trueeee. Anyway, back to what I was saying.  Here, Tammi... I'll help you out.  The words you're looking for are 'do', 'you', 'want', 'to', 'go', and 'out'.  Just say those in that order." Without thinking, Tammi just said the words, while facing Nalyd, "Hmm... Do. You. Want. To. Go. Out. Why would I say th--" "What took you so long, babe?" Nalyd sultrily muttered, jumping out of his chair and onto Tammi, kissing her. Tammi, with her eyes open, was about to push Nalyd away, but, then, finally closed her eyes, gave in, and kissed him back, passionately. "Whoooooooooooooooo!!!" Stefani screamed, falling out in her chair. Nalyd and Tammi kept kissing. "Alright, alright, break it up! I'm about to throw up," Chris lied, pulling them apart, "Now, back to I was saying.  2 points to the first person that can give me the numerical term of 'spooning'!" Nalyd buzzed in, "66!" "That is absolutely correct!!" Chris shouted, "Nalyd, you're really scaring me with all these answers you're getting." "Know from experience, man," Nalyd winked. Ryan stifled a laugh, "With a boy, I presume? No way any female with a pulse would want to do that with you" He, then, busted out laughing. Nalyd bursted out, "That's not true! I have Tammi, now." "Like I said, no female with a pulse would want to do that," Ryan said, putting an emphasis on 'female'.

Tammi: (sighs) This is getting old.

"Next question!" Chris announced, "Oooh, a good one!! What does '69ing' someone mean?!" Jeff buzzed in, "That's when you (bleep) the (bleep) out of someone, right, man?" Chris widened his eyes, "What an interesting vocabulary. That's correct!!  2 points for the Jeff-ster!  Now, 4 point question:  Describe Ryan for me!" "That's not a sexual que--" Ryan was interrupted by everyone buzzing in but him. "We'll have to go to the judges for this one, who buzzed in first!?" Chris asked them, off-screen again. Sarcastically, he continued, "What!? A Seven-Way Tie!?  Alright, then.  Well, I have no choice but to let you all answer.  4 points on the line for the right answers!" "A badddddddddd dude," Jeff went first. "Someone who needs to get laid! Maybe he wouldn't be so mean, then," Katherine added. "Some twerp," Lilie threw in. "A big, fat, (long 15-second expletive) with a bad haircut!" Nalyd snarled, causing Ryan to gasp. "Someone that doesn't know these babies are!!" Stefani said, taking the Post-Its off of her breasts. "Well, this is a great question, I'm so unprepared to answer it!" Tammi said. At that point, she inched a piece of paper out of her pocket labeled 'Ryan is...', "Hmm. A stu--" An 'incorrect' buzzer went off. "Oh, it appears you took too much time, Tam-Tam!" Chris said, "Terry?" The camera panned over to Terry. Terry looked at Nalyd, who gave him a 'say it, say it!' motion. He, then, looked at Ryan, who gave Terry a 'cut-throat' motion.

Terry: I was so scared. I had no choice but to say... (confessional cut off)

"Ryan's the best person I know," Terry muttered. "Ehhhhhhhh!!!" Chris imitated the 'incorrect' buzzer since it didn't activate, "Not the answer I was looking for!" Ryan looked at Chris with a rather 'confident' look, while everyone else just rolled their eyes (except Jeff). "Eh, what's four points to me?" Terry asked himself. Chris gasped, "Actually, Terry. There were some really good answers to that question.  I likey!  Soooooo, I think some people deserve a few more points, than others." Chris cleared his throat, "Jeff, how's 5 sound?" "Coolio, I guess, better than nothing!" Jeff shouted. "Katherine, 8! That was amazing!  Lilie.  Always with the simple answers.  That wasn't much, so... 1."  Katherine clapped her hands, as Lilie gave Chris the 'I'm Watching You' motion. "Nalyd. Just. Plain. Amazing.  I'll give Nixon 5 outta 4!" Chris shouted. Nalyd grumbled, "5?! That's it?!" "Take it or leave it, Dumbeldore!" "Can I... give them to someone?" "Uhh... Judges!?" Chris yelled off-screen again. A dinging noise came from out of nowhere again. Chris shook his head 'yes', "Our judges are allowing this." "I'd like to give 3 to my sweet Tammi," Nalyd said, trying to sound romantic. Tammi cringed over this, still seeming to get used to the compliments. "Nalyd, you had negative 2 right before that last question. I just gave you 5 points.  Now, you have three.  If you give those to Tammi, you won't have anything," Chris threw at him, intelligently. "Nice math, genius," Nalyd told him, "I don't care, I want her to have them. She deserves them." "Aweeeeeeeeeeeee," Katherine said from afar. Stefani got up from the floor, "'Awe'? Who died!?" She, then, fell on the floor again. Chris marked things on his paper, "Okay, zero points for Nalyd. Next, Stefani." Chris looked down on the ground and yelled at Stefani, "How's 6 sound?!" "I-I-I-I-I-I-I dun like 6... Gimme 2!" Stefani yelled back. "Okayyyyyyyy, what do you want me to do with the other 4?" Stefani grabbed Nalyd and Tammi's heads, "Split it between these two wuvvie-dovvies!! A-hehe!" "You guys are really making me work hard with this point stuff! Why can't you just take 'em!?" Chris said, making edits and marks to his scoresheet. "Next. Ryan.  Didn't have an answer, so zero.  Next.  Tammi.  Didn't have an answer, so zero.  And, last, Terry.  Didn't have an answer I liked, so........ uhhhh...... zero!" Chris began calculating, "Hmm, carry the two, add the one, multi-- GOT IT! And, here are your trivia scores!!  Quite suckish, I might add!  On-screen!" Everyone, then, looked at the monitor in the Sex Education room.

"And, with those 5 points from Nalyd, Katherine wins the first challenge, the Hall Pass, and the advantage for the second challenge!" Chris made clear. Katherine jumped out of her chair, "That's what's up, you (bleep)s!" Lilie opened her eyes, "Calm down, gosh." "Maybe you should get hyped!" Katherine yelled. She, then, ran over to Lilie and took her shirt off, showing her bare white bra with briefcases on it. "C'mon, get pumped!" Katherine declared, trying to shake Lilie from her grumpiness. Lilie immediately covered her chest. "You don't see that everyday," Jeff said to the other schoolmates. "You do if you're Chris. McLean," Chris butted in, flashing a white smile to the camera.

The scene switched again to everyone in the blue and pink chairs near the front of the room for the second challenge. They were all arranged in order of the first challenge positions (Katherine, Jeff, Tammi, Nalyd, Ryan, Stefani, Lilie, and then Terry). "Okay, elimination challenge time!" Chris beamed, "You're all arranged in pairs for this one for the tournament portion of the challenge. And, here's what it looks like!" Chris pointed to the same monitor again where the trivia scores were posted, as everyone looked up at it.

"We'll start you off with Round One. In a few minutes, a few interns are going to come in here and help me with a.... visual aid." Chris told the schoolmates. "What do you mean by... visual aid?" Ryan smugly asked. Right after Ryan asked that, two completely naked interns, one male and very skinny, the other female and very overweight, came into the Sex Education room and stood next to Chris, in front of the schoolmates. "DUDE! Don't you think there's enough nudity in this room!?  Look at Stefani!" Jeff shouted, shielding his eyes. "Liiiiiiiiiiiiick me, baaaaaaaaaaaaaaby," Stefani said, as the camera went over to her. At that point, both Stefani and Terry fell out of their chairs (again). The camera zoomed back in on Chris, "Your challenge today is... to just stay in those chairs. That's IT!  Stay in those chairs........... while I talk to you about these two interns here.  As you can see by the tournament brackets on the monitors, whichever dude or dudette falls out of their chair or finds a way to leave it will lose and the other will move on.  We continue the process until we have one person that outlasts all of the sexgame!  Ready and....... Begin!!"

"Let's start with the girl," Chris announced, "She's 820 pounds." Lilie began retching. "How can someone weigh that much!?" Tammi asked. "Ask your mother," Ryan quietly said under his breath. "What was that?" "Oh, I said, 'Some way or another'." Katherine, then, stood up, "I'm invincible anyway, so whatever." Katherine, then, got up by herself, and jumped onto Jeff's lap, and randomly started making out with him. "Uhhh.... And, Katherine's OUT! Jeff moves on!" Chris stumbled on his words, "Hmm, I'll come back to the girl. Let's go to the boy.  140 pounds, 6-foot-1, and a 10 inch (bleep)!!" Terry immediately threw up and fell out of his seat. "And, Terry's outta there! Lilie moves on to Round Two!" Chris shouted, "This is actually easier than I thought it would be, you guys are dropping like flies. C'mon, it's not that bad!" Tammi, then, leaned over to Nalyd, "I bet that's in your pants, too, 'eh?" Nalyd's eyes grew wide. He, then, literally melted out of his seat, giving Tammi the win. "Tammi moves onto Round Two, Nalyd's out! Ryan, Stefani, you two are left for Round One!  Let's amp it up some!!" Chris went over to the female intern again and pushed her up in front of the two. Ryan looked grossed out and Stefani was looking directly at the girl. "Coooooooooool," she muttered, "How do you get your boobs down to your feet like that?" Nalyd and Terry, on the sidelines, then, literally threw up in each other's face. "You're going down, crazy!" Ryan told her. "Can't I go up?" she said, looking confused.

Ryan: She's so loopy, that loser probably isn't even listening to me! Hmm....

Ryan gasped and pointed over behind Stefani, "Look! It's Jordan, your alleged loser boyfriend from back home!" "Yeah, right," Stefani grumbled, not looking. "You're right, it's just a shoe." "A shoe!? Where?!" Stefani ran out of her seat, into that direction, hitting the wall in the process. "Ryan advances on!! Stefani's chasin' a shoe!" Chris smiled as he said the results. The bracket, then, updated itself.

"Round Two!" Chris beamed, "And, to make it interesting, let's bump it up some more!" Chris yelled off-screen, "Dudes! Bring in the Level Two stuff!" The two interns left the room and a couple different ones came in with a giant television. "Jeff vs. Tammi, and Ryan vs. Lilie! Same rules apply, and... to make it even more interesting, I'll add a new rule!  You have to stare at look at whatever is shown on this killer television.  If you fall out of your chair in any way or take your eyes off the TV, you're out!" "Oh, joy," Lilie said. "This should be easy," Tammi said, eyeing Jeff... and Katherine. Jeff, still making out with Katherine from before moaned out, "Let's do it!" Chris, then, turned the TV on to see a male and a female having regular sex, "Now, notice the high levels of moaning the female is doing and the high number of times the male continues to say 'yeah' and 'c'mon'!" Jeff tried to get Katherine to stop making out with him and tried looking at the screen. He playfully pushed Katherine off of him, bringing himself down in the process. "Oof!" he said, hitting the floor. "Party boy had one too many smooches! He's out!" Chris announced, "Now, it's down to you two!"

"So, Lilie," Ryan said to her, watching the screen in disgust. "Yes, Ryan?" "What's it like being... a tight-wad?" Lilie got offended and stood up, "WHAT!? I am so not a tight-wad!" "And, Lilie is outta there! Ryan moves on!" Chris smiled. "No!! Noooo!!" Lilie shouted, "He cheated! He distracted me!" Chris shook his head 'no', "Tsk, tsk, tsk, I never said he couldn't do that."

Lilie: I know I'm in his alliance, and all, but that is not right!! Ryan: (puts his hand together) Now that the deadweight is out, time to go to work.

"Ryan, Tammi, are you ready!?" Chris announced. "Ready!" the two of them said, simultaneously. "Go!" Chris said, turning to a different channel on the television. The TV then showed the popular, yet disgusting video of 2 Girls, One Cup. Ryan immediately began retching and threw up in front of him, while Tammi calmly looked at the video.

Ryan: That's no fair! She's a girl, she has an advantage! UGH! Tammi: Being a younger sister to stupid brothers, I've seen this dozens of times on purpose, since they made me watch it on purpose! (chuckles) This game is mine.

Still looking at the video, Tammi leaned over to Ryan, "You're not having trouble, are ya?!" Ryan, then, began thinking a bit deviously. Amplifying his voice so Nalyd could hear it, he yelled, "What's that, Tammi!? You're cheating on Nalyd already!?!?!?!?!" "What?! No!" Tammi responded still looking at the screen. Ryan immediately threw up again, still looking at the screen. "Poor Nalyd, huh!?!?!" he yelled out loud again. This got Nalyd's attention. "Say it again, Tammi!? You want to go separate ways with Nalyd already?!" Ryan shouted. Tammi grew mad at Ryan, as Nalyd began looking sad. Ryan screamed, "You want that naked male intern!? Seriously!?!?!?" "Ryan, why are you doing this?" Tammi whispered to him. Though, it was too late. Nalyd, then, left the room after Ryan's last comment. Tammi heard a door slam shut, looked back, and ran after Nalyd, "Nalyd, come back!!" Ryan continued to look at the screen and waved good-bye to Tammi behind him, without looking at her.

"Ryan wins immunity!!" Chris announced. "Naturally," he smirked. "But, that was pretty low, dude." "Do you think I care? It's all apart of the master plan." "What master plan?" "What-what master plan?" Ryan asked him back, getting up and walking to the Detention Hall Room. Chris announced to the rest of the schoolmates still in the room, "Well, with Katherine and Ryan immune, it's time for another voting ceremony! Everyone, to the Detention Hall Room!"

Before the voting, Ryan and Tammi were talking about what just happened. "RYAN!!" Tammi shouted. "What?" "What were you doing out there!?" Ryan looked to his left, then his right, to make sure no one was looking, "I did that for you." "... Huh?" "Yeah, I did that to make this relationship between you and Nalyd," Ryan lied. Tammi scratched her head, "I'm confused. And, why should I believe this!?" "Because I know Nalyd. We share the same room, remember?  It was bound for him to tell me a few things about himself.  He told me he's not the jealous type, and that he was really hoping you weren't when he finally hooked up with you.  He told me that things like what just happened in Sex Ed would help your relationship." "H-h... He did?" Tammi questioned. "Yes! He did.  Would I lie to you?" Ryan said, smiling, "Plus, you're in my alliance. It would be stupid to-- "I'mma goin' up yonderrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!" Stefani yelled, running past Ryan and Tammi. Ryan cocked an eyebrow again, "Anywayyyyy, it would be stupid to lie to you. To tell you the truth, I'm thinking about getting rid of grumpy Lilie. She's no use in our alliance, anyway. That's who we all should vote for." Tammi, still thinking about Ace in the computer lab episode and the chaos, agreed, "Yeah, yeah, I-I-I think so, too. And... I'm sorry, Ryan. I shouldn't have accused you." Tammi offered a hug, and Ryan accepted it, showing an evil face behind her. "Oh, it's okay. I thought Nalyd told you all of this, so I just did what I had to do to help. Anything for my real alliance members. Not like Lilie, though. She's nothing but a scoff-machine." They stopped hugging and Tammi chuckled.

The scene, then changed to everyone in the Detention Hall Room. The camera panned down everyone in the room, as they voted for someone. "Time to go, dude," Jeff said, voting for someone. "Uhhhh....," Katherine muttered, hitting a random button on the device. "Ryan said it's time for you to leave. I'm sorry, bye-bye," Lilie said, clicking on someone. "I'm siding with Jeff on this one," Nalyd clicked on Terry. "It's time for the best elimination yet," Ryan said, voting for a schoolmate. Still loopy, Stefani just threw her voting device at Ryan's head. "OW!" Ryan snarled. "I never found that shoe!!" she said, dazed. "Goodbyeeeeeee, Lilie," Tammi said, voting for Lilie. Terry didn't say anything, but just voted for someone.

Chris received the votes and gasped, "Oh-ho-ho, get ready for this!! Golden A+'s to Jeff and Stefani!" "Sweet, man!" Jeff said, catching his award. Chris threw Stefani's award at her, but, again, it hit her in the head since Stefani made no attempt to catch it. Stefani's head, then, fell to her desk. "Mr. Penal Man, himself, Nalyd..... and.............. Lilie!" Tammi gasped for joy when Nalyd caught his award, but was confused that Lilie got one. "What?!" Ryan said with a fake tone. "and.... Katherine and Ryan!" Chris announced, throwing the Golden A+'s to them. "What the heck?!" Tammi scowled, "Ryan, what's going on?!" "I do not know!" Ryan gasped, once again using a fake tone, and lying through his teeth. Chris declared, "And the final Golden A+ goes to......... somehow.............. TERRY!!" Terry caught his award and smiled. "What just happened!?" Tammi yelled.

"Sweetie, you just got voted....... say it with me, now........ ooooooooooout," Ryan smart-alecly said. "How!? Who voted for me!?" Tammi demanded to know. No one raised their hands or anything. Tammi looked over to Nalyd, "Nalyd, do something!!" Nalyd merely jerked his head. "Nalyd? Nalyd!!" Tammi yelled. "Oh, sorry, your time is up!!" Chris quickly said, grabbing Tammi and forcing her out the door. "No! Eee-No!!!  Nalyd!!  I'll never forget y-- Aahhh!!" Tammi yelled, as Chris threw her out of the school.

Jeff: Dudes.... That was scary. Katherine: I just voted for Terry, wow. Lilie: She got what was coming to her. That's all I can say. Nalyd: (sobbing) I guess it just wasn't meant to be. Stefani: (doesn't say anything) Terry: Whooooooooooooooooa. Ryan: Ha! Now, 'Tam-Tam' gone, this game is officially mine. (begins to laugh) I can not believe how she bought that relationship crap!! Pathetic!

"With that, we go from 8 to 7!! I'm still getting over what just happened!  Will Ryan cease to amaze me with these eliminations?  What will become of Tammi and Nalyd!?  And, will there ever be a day where Stefani doesn't act like a complete fool!?!  Doubtful.  But, anyway, find out for sure on the next episode of Total.... Drama..... 1-0-1!!" Chris walked off-screen, "I can't believe nobody made a 'That's What She Said' joke... Wow. Alright, we're done!" "That's what she said!!" a few voices were heard off-screen. "NICE!" Chris yelled, laughing.

Chapter Nineteen: Feast & Dissect
"Sexual education," Chris started, standing outside the Gilded Glory school, while scenes from the previous episode was being shown, "the phrase that causes many laughs, many tears... and much barfing! Here, out schoolmates learned that the best way to learn about sex ed would be to attack it head-on!  Or... maybe 'clothes off'... ''Stefani!" Chris laughed, and continued, "Some people think it's hard to learn about sex ed, yet, others really look forward to it. Whether or not Tammi was looking forward to her elimination in that episode, I'll never know.  Oh.... Wait.  She left kicking and screaming, so I don't think she was! Ha!  There's only seven contestants left.  Find out what happens, and who goes home next on Total... Drama.... 1-0-1!"

After the theme song, the camera faded back in to show the outside of the mansion the Final Seven were staying in at nighttime. Right then, the ground started shaking as Nalyd yelled out, "TAMMI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" The camera switched scenes to show Nalyd, leaned on the Master Bedroom door, sobbing and crying. The camera panned over to the bathroom to see Ryan in it, covering his ears and getting ready for bed. "I think we've found the thing more annoying than his looks," Ryan mumbled to himself, "Stop crying!!" he yelled, leaving the bathroom and entering the bedroom. Nalyd stopped crying for a few seconds and looked sinisterly at Ryan.

Nalyd: It's all his fault!! I know it is! My little Tamantha's out of the game. And, he's not going to get away with doing that!

"What?" Ryan said, looking at Nalyd, who was still staring at him, evilly. At that point, the remaining Final Seven barged into the Master Bedroom with Lilie in front of them all. "We've all agreed that you need to find a way to shut Heartbreak Romeo over there, up!" Lilie scolded Ryan. Ryan cocked an eyebrow, "You really think I care?" This caused Lilie to scoff, "You want some sleep, don't you!?" "Tammi used to sleep!!!" Nalyd cried, remembering Tammi stupidly. This sentence started him to start bawling again. Ryan rolled his eyes, "Whatever! But, I'm not doing it, just get him to stop! I need my 11 hours of beauty sleep, people!!" "11?" everyone but Nalyd questioned Ryan. "Just do it," he smirked.

Nalyd went over to the bed and fell onto it, still bawling. Lilie, Jeff, Katherine, Stefani, and Terry all looked at each other before they all pushed Terry into the room, as he hit the bed. Nalyd sat up. Terry tried reaching his arm around Nalyd, "Hey, there, lit--" Nalyd immediately cut him off and began bawling even louder. Terry ran out of the room, "I can't do this!!"

Terry: I don't like seeing people cry. It messes with my brain. It reminds me..... of me, sometimes. (sniffles) But, I hear from semi-reliable sources that turnin' on the tears gets the ladies. (sexily growls)

As Terry walked back to the group, the camera showed the other 4 playing Rock, Paper, Scissors. At the end of the first round, Lilie, Jeff, and Katherine all played 'Scissors', while Stefani played 'Paper'. Everyone began smiling at her in a mocking-way. Stefani punched Katherine to the ground for no reason, and marched over to Nalyd. "Heyyyyy, Nalyd," she started. Nalyd looked at her still sobbing, "What's up?" "We... uhh... all think you should stop sobbing. Uhhhh.... Sigh.  You'll see Tammi again." Still sniffling, Nalyd responded, "Yeah. Ma-maybe you're right." "Yeah. You're like toooooo-tally blowing this out of proportion." "Yeahhhhhhh." "Yeah, you're not even thinking about how she could be choking right now." Nalyd put his hand on his chest. "... or being beaten..." Nalyd gasped. "... or dead, stuffed into a sack..." Nalyd gasped, as tears began forming in his eyes. "... or maybe even kissing some other super-hot guy." Nalyd gasped so loudly, he nearly choked, as tears began rolling down his eyes. He easily began crying again. Stefani got up and walked back over to the other four, "There, I tried my best." "No, you didn't," Lilie reminded her. "Scoff. Who are you, my wife?" Stefani sarcastically said, slapping Lilie down. She left the Master Bedroom, leaving Jeff, Katherine, Lilie, and Terry wondering how to stop Nalyd from crying. Lilie eyed both Jeff & Katherine, and the two of them went over toward Nalyd and sat on the bed. Ryan, on the other side of the bed, saw this and groaned.

Ryan: Great. Now I have to disinfect the bed from "dude"-germs. (scoffs)

"So," Jeff started. "Uh-huhhh," Katherine said, right behind Jeff's remark. Nalyd looked at the two of them, "You guys are so lucky. You still have someone else here!" He began bawling again, screaming Tammi's name. Ignoring the problem at hand, Jeff turned to Katherine, "We are lucky." "You wanna show them just how lucky we are?" Katherine asked, winking at Jeff. The two of them immediately began making out on the bed. "Uh-uh! Not on my bed! Take it outside, freaks!" Ryan reprimanded them. Without pausing to watch where he was going, Jeff picked Katherine up, still making out with her, and exited the room. "Ugh... Lovebirds. Sick," Lilie watched the two of them leave. "Tammi and me used to be lovebirds!!!" Nalyd yelled out, continuously bawling. Ryan finally couldn't take it anymore and smacked him, "Get it together!" He, then, sighed, "Lilie, can you help with this walking sink?!" Lilie opened her mouth, but couldn't say anything, due to Chris coming onto the intercom of the school. "Is this thing on?" Chris asked into the intercom. He began tapping onto the P.A. system and a ear-splitting, high frequency feedback noise came on, causing everyone in the mansion to cover their ears. "Uhh... I guess it is. Anyway, all schoolmates report to Room 138 for the next challenge!" Chris yelled into the P.A. system. The camera went over to where Lilie was, who had her hand on her chin, thinking.

Lilie: You know. Usually, when Chris announces that it's time for a stupid challenge, he always says the subject of the challenge. He didn't do it this time. Either something's wrong.... or Chris is just being a (bleep).

Everyone was walking in Gilded Glory to Room 138 in a group, not knowing what the subject was. "Does anyone know where Room 138 is? I'm only good with finding the subject halls," Katherine informed everyone. Lilie assured her, "Sure, it's... uh...." She began pointing in numerous directions, "It's that wa-- No, it's t--  NO! Th--  Uhh...." After Lilie's stumbling, everyone stopped in their tracks. "Wait. So nobody knows where this room is?!" Jeff shouted. Nalyd spoke out, "If TAMMI were here, she'd--" "Zip. It.  Now," Ryan manually closed Nalyd's mouth, preventing him from speaking of Tammi. Nalyd shook his head, and remained silent, trying not to cry as well. "Maybe we should split up," Terry suggested.

Katherine: Yeah, that's a great idea. (sarcastically) Then, we can go outside and watch grass die! Yay!!

Ryan began looking devious, "You know... Terry's right. Splitting up wouldn't be that bad of an idea." "YEAH!" Terry enthusiastically shouted, shaking his head 'yes', "And, I have the perfect way for us to split up!" Lilie cocked an eye up, "Oh?" Terry pointing to the South and East wings of the school, "Yeah, me.... and Lilie... and Katherine.... and Stefani can go this way." He, then, threw his hands to the North and West wings of the school, "And... everyone else go some other way." He, then, winked at Stefani, who gave him an 'I'm watching you' motion. Terry took this as a hint of endearment, and cocked his eyebrows up at her, romantically. "Uhhh....," Jeff scratched his head. "Back me up here, Kat," Terry said, pointing at Katherine, who was behind him now. Katherine laughed, "Pfft. Beyoncé couldn't back you up." Jeff listened to the two of them go at it for a few more seconds. "I need some more sleep," he said, looking a bit drained. Ryan went over to Terry again, "I have a better idea. How about.... you go search the North, East, and West wings up there, and the rest of us can go check the South side!  'Kay?" Looking confused, Terry agreed, "Okayyyyyy?" "Perfect!" Ryan finished, pushing Terry on his way. Ryan and the others began walking in a South direction.

Ryan: I just wanted to get away from Terry for a while. His lady-charming skills are simply appalling. It's.... like.... poison for your ears! Ugh! And, unlike the rest of the bozos here, I do know how to get to Room 138. I know it's somewhere in the South part of the school. Who knows where Terry the Terrible's going? (chuckles)

Terry watched as the rest of the group left for the South wing of the school. "Uhh... Okay!! So, I guess we'll meet back here, then!?" Terry yelled at Ryan. Ryan, then, shooed everyone, making them go faster, ignoring them in the process.

The camera, then, switched scenes to Ryan's group going South. They were all passing the rooms in the 300s section. "324, 326, 328, 330," Lilie said counting the room numbers on one side of the school, "Ryan, are you sure this is the right way." Ryan confirmed her, "Uh-huh. I have a map of this place in my room somewhere.  I scanned and memorized it to plot...... I mean... for 'challenge purposes'." Ryan then nonchalantly smiled at her. "Okayyy," she told him. Looking at the rooms, Jeff stopped at Room 336 and read the plaque next to it's door, "Hibernation Class? There's a class here for sleeping!? Wicked awesome!"

Jeff: I got exactly 6 minutes off sleep tonight. And somehow, everyone else is so darn chipper. It's, like, 11 P.M.! When did you sleep!?

Jeff inched away from the group and opened the door to Room 336. He looked in to see pillows everywhere in the room. Gasping for breath, he uttered, "It's... it's... paradise!" He ran in, slamming the door behind him, and crashed on one of the pillows. Ryan, Nalyd, Stefani, Katherine, and Lilie then turned around, hearing the noise. "What... was that?" Nalyd wondered, sniffling a bit. Ryan ignored him, "Who cares? Let's keep moving. We need to find this room... uhh... I mean get to this room!" "Hey, where's Jeff?" Katherine asked everyone, looking around for him. Everyone began looking in all directions, not finding him. "Was he even with us?" Lilie wondered. Ryan pointed to both Lilie and Katherine, "Pretend like I'm a CD player and I'm on 'repeat'. Keep replaying the last thing I just said to Nalyd in your mind for each question you have.  Cool? Cool." Ryan proceeded on, with Nalyd and Stefani behind him, and Katherine and Lilie, rolling their eyes, behind the two of them.

The camera then, switched scenes to Terry, alone, in the North wing of Gilded Glory. He yawned a bit, remembering it was still nighttime. Terry was passing the rooms in the 100s section, going backwards. "Hmm... 150, 148, 146, I must be getting pretty close," Terry said to himself. After a few more seconds, Terry finally made it to Room 138, and entered it to see Chris, stretched out on the ground, looking lifeless with a purple-shaded skin tone about him. Terry immediately gasped, "Chris!!" He ran over to his side. "Are-are you dead!? Hurt?!  Sexy!?" Terry said, not being able to think of a third word. Terry began looking around the room, seeing many scalpels, microscopes, test tubes, beakers and glasses of all sizes, tongs, gloves, aprons, goggles and many tables. "What is this plac--" Terry was stopped in his tracks when he found a note on one of the tables.

Terry proceeded to read it, when the scene changed back to everyone else but Jeff still heading in the apparent wrong direction. Lilie began getting worried, "We're getting into the 400 rooms, Ryan. Are you sure you--" "I know what I'm doing," Ryan assured her. Lilie, then, marched in front of Ryan, looking as if she wanted to take charge. Talking to Ryan, who was now behind her, she said, "Maybe I should lead, hmm?" Ryan, then, tugged at Lilie's shirt in front of him, then, threw her to the back of the group. He then turned around, which caused everyone to stop in their tracks. "I said... I. Got. This," Ryan growled at her in a malignant tone. The camera, then, panned to Nalyd, who looked a bit scared of Ryan, then to Stefani, who didn't care. She, then, saw that the camera was right in her face and gave it 'the finger'. The camera, then panned to Katherine, who was randomly bopping her head to a beat that was playing in her head, then to Lilie, who silently stuck her tongue out at Ryan, who had turned back around at the time. "Let's go, guys," he told them, and they carried on.

Lilie: (sighs) Look. I'm an experienced businesswoman. I've talked to big-time business corporate manager officials, C.E.O.'s, I earn at least 92 cents a day for doing nothing! I've memorized state maps, nation maps, world maps! I think I know my way around a little school more than this two-bit, 10-year old girl trapped in a 5-year-- (confessional cut off)

Lilie, then, saw an intersection in the direction Ryan's group was going in what had seemed like a giant straight line of rooms leading nowhere. Ryan and Stefani ignored the possible left and right ways that the group could have gone and continued straight. Nalyd and Katherine were about to do the same when Lilie grabbed them both without Ryan's hearing. He and Stefani continued on. "Waiii--" Katherine was about to yell out when Lilie covered her mouth. "Shhhhhh!!!" Lilie told her, whispering, "I don't know if you two have noticed. But, we're getting farther and farther away from 138, thanks to Ryan." Katherine shook her head 'no', "Oh, I didn't notice. I've been singing our song in my head for the longest." "Our song?" Lilie whispered back to her. "Yeah, mine and Jeff's song. Heh... I wonder where he went."

The camera then switched scenes to show Jeff, sleeping in fetal position in Room 336. He seemed to be talking in his sleep, "Ohhhh, Katherine..... Ohhhh, Katherine. Ohhhhhhhh, Katherine, this vibrating chair is aw-w-w-w-w-w-esome.  Ohhhh, Ka-a-a-a-therine, stop it... You'll wake the gnomes."

The camera switched scenes again to show Terry, in Room 138, reading the note.

Terry: What I don't understand is that Chris was sounding just fine in the intercom about 5 minutes ago, and now this happened! I don't even know if he's dead, but now he looks all purple. Kinda like Barney! Haha!

"'Gon' to get help fa' Chris. Stupid man done almost killed himself.  Key to box-thang he holdin' lodged up in his stomach.  Lousy host be gettin' paid for nothin'.  I don't know why I'm tryna' save his (bleep). Love, Chef.'  Hmm.... Well, that's Chef for ya." Terry saw Chris again, with a medium sized box in his hand and gasped, "Oh, no! I mean 'Chris!'  Uhh... I dunno what to do!  I-- Wait a minute................ How did he swallow a key!?!" Terry then ran over to all the equipment he had saw earlier. He donned an apron, goggles, and grabbed a scalpel. At that point, he ran back over to Chris and kneeled down next to him. "This.... uh... won't hurt a bit," Terry said raising the scalpel. Right before an action was taken, the camera switched scenes.

"Forget about him for a minute," Lilie said to Katherine, talking about Jeff, "You wanna continue following Idiot Boy up there, or do you want to find that room?" "I don't know what I was thinking in following him," Nalyd said, still sniffling, "Tammi wouldn't have did it, unless she had to, so why did I!?" Nalyd almost began crying again, but Lilie and Katherine covered his mouth so Ryan couldn't hear him. At that moment, Ryan and Stefani were almost out of sight, so the three of them began talking in their normal tones. "Alright, guys, I realllllllyyyyyyy think that we need to go in this left direction. Ryan's gonna get him and Moody up there totally lost." Lilie told the two of them, "So, like I was saying earlier, do you want to go catch up to Idiot Boy or do you wanna win this thing!" Katherine and Nalyd, who have been somewhat rivals since the Singing challenge, agreed to working together temporarily with Lilie by shaking their head 'yes'. "Onward, lacke-- uh... 'team'!" Lilie said, going to the left. Nalyd was about to follow until he stopped in his tracks immediately. Not sobbing anymore, he pointed behind him, "Wait a minute.... How do we know it's not to go right!?" "Uhhh," Lilie stammered then quickly said, "We don't. Now, let's move!" The three of them, without much thought, then ran to the left. As Lilie and Katherine kept going, Nalyd was about to follow them until he noticed a key on the ground. "What's this thing?" he said, picking it up. He didn't give it a second thought and left, following Katherine and Lilie.

The camera then went back to Ryan and Stefani. Still going in the same direction, Ryan began heard sobbing noises come from somewhere. "Nalyd, what did I tell you about that incessant sobbing?" he reprimanded him, not looking back. The noises began getting louder. Ryan got arrogant, "Nalyd, I mean it. Stop the crying." The noise grew even louder. "Nalyd, stop your--" Ryan turned around to see only Stefani, "H-hey... Where's Nalyd? And... Lilie..... And Katherine..... And Jeff??" "I don't know, am I suddenly their keepers now?" Stefani rolled her eyes. "Well, you coulda told me they were gone!" "I'm not your keeper, either..... perv." Stefani walked off, and Ryan just looked her, groaning.

Ryan: (sincere tone) Wherever the rest of my temporary team is... (smiling) I just want to tell you.... (yelling into the camera) Get your (bleep)s back here and take Miss Smart-Mouth with you! UGH!!

Back with Terry, he, then, jammed the scalpel into Chris's body, and his body literally popped like a balloon, and only, what appeared to be, Chris's skin was all that remained and a key on top of it with the box 'Chris' was holding next to the 'skin'. Terry picked up the key and let out a huge, echoing scream. At that point, Chef Hatchet came into the room with a defibrillator, thinking that would help Chris. He saw the 'remains of Chris' on the ground next to Terry and took drastic measures. Chef took out a small remote and pressed the red, center button. Right then, the camera went to Ryan and Stefani, who fell through a hidden drop zone in the floor, yelling. The camera then went to Lilie, Nalyd, and Katherine, who also fell through one of the school's hidden drop zones, yelling all the way down. It then went to a sleeping Jeff, who fell through a drop zone, as well.

The camera then switched scenes to Terry crying over Chris with the same key in his hands. At that point, everyone came crashing into Room 138, dropping from the ceiling, all landing in a pile next to Terry. Ryan and Lilie got up at about the same time and tried to take all the glory, "HA! I knew I could find this stupid ro--" The both of them looked to see that the other was saying the same thing. Simultaneously speaking, they yelled, "You!? I found this room!  What!?  No way!!" "SHUT UP!" Chef Hatchet screamed at the both of them, "Neither one of you found the room. This white boy down here cryin' found it!" "That... was.... AWE-SOME!!!" Chris yelled, coming out from behind a curtain, "The drama! The tears!  The getting-lost-and-blaming-it-on-other-people!  Brilliant television, guys!  Ratings are sure to go up!" Terry, then, screamed at seeing the real Chris and hugged him, "Chris!! I thought-- And you were-- And she was-- And him with the yelling-- And, and, and.... Ohhhh!  I'm so glad you're alive!" "Easy, tiger, step back about 5..... meters," Chris sarcastically told him, "Allow me to explain. First of all, I didn't even think about how not saying--" Ryan cut him off, "What the heck just happened!?" "Ugh," Chris sighed, "Do you hear yourself when you speak or is just a loud, obnoxious roaring in your ears, dude? It's the latter for me.  Anyway." Chris walked over to the 'carcass' that Terry left behind after jamming the scalpel in it. He picked it up and the box it was holding. "Terry, you can stop crying at any time. This was a fake Chris," Chris told everyone, Terry especially. "It is?" Terry asked. "Yes... yes, it is. He was only here because he was hiding one of the keys I had hidden around in the room somewhere to open this box." Chris flashed the box and showed the schoolmates the two keylocks located in the center of the box. Ryan smirked, "Why are we looking at a box?" "Patience, my dear headache," Chris told him, "Now, I know Terry got the key inside Dummy Chris... but I hid another key somewhere in the school's... areas." Katherine stood up, "You expected us to find one measly little key in this bi--" "Found it!" Nalyd said, pulling the key out of his pocket. Katherine gasped, "Just shoot me." "That could be arranged," Stefani mentioned in a monotone voice, coming up from out of nowhere behind Katherine. A bit scared, Katherine awkwardly backed away from Stefani. "Congratulations to Terry and Nalyd! You guys get an advantage in the challenge today!" Chris beamed. "What challenge?" Terry wondered. Chris smiled, "Why don't you and Nalyd put the keys in this box to unlock it and find out?"

Both boys did so, and when the box opened, five frogs, still fully alive, hopped out of the box. Four of them began hopping all around the room, and one hopped right into Ryan's hair. "Ew, ew, ew!! Get it out! Get it out! Get! It! Out!!" Ryan screamed. He began flailing his limbs everywhere, slapping and punching out Nalyd and Jeff.

Nalyd: What a little girl! Ugh... (sighs) Patience, Nalyd... Patience.

"Wait a minute," Stefani muttered. She began looking at her surroundings, "Microscopes... Scalpels... Frogs... Ryan freaking out. Oh, wait, that's natural, but crap!  We're in Biology class, aren't we?" "You're very cogent, Stefani," Chris told her, "Yes. This is Biology class.  And, hopefully, the frogs will give you a hinty-hint over what the challenge is." The frog in Ryan's hair finally hopped out and joined the other four frogs. "Ewwww, we have to dissect them?!" Lilie wondered. "Psh. No. Chris would probably make us do something stupid like..... eat them," Ryan said out loud. Chris butted in, "Which is why you're going to be choosing which one you do!" "Ew, they both stink!" Nalyd grumbled, "And, wait... there's only five frogs, but there's seven of us." "Riiiiight," Chris stretched out, "Well, since you and Terry found the keys to unlock this thing.... I'll give you invincibility from tonight's vote-off!" Everyone gasped. Nalyd and Terry high-fived each other, simultaneously saying "Yes!" in the process. "As for the rest of you, the first thing you need to do is catch one of those hopping nightmares, then... next, you have the choice to either dissect the frog or... umm..." Chris stopped talking and put his finger in his mouth to show the other thing the schoolmates could do. That immediately caused Lilie and Ryan to puke on each other. "And, get this, first one to finish the complete dissection or finish eating the frog, still alive, of course, gets to steal the invincibility of one of these two key-trackers over here. Since two people are gonna have immunity this time, there is no Hall Pass, so you better fight for the win!  Get to it!!"

"Just get over here, you stupid green frog-thing!" Lilie said, trying to catch a frog when the camera changed scenes. Ryan walked past her with the same frog from earlier on his head. "Having trouble?" Ryan asked her, steadily walking. "A little. Can you help?" "What, what? Sorry... you're.... breaking up," Ryan lied to her, still walking towards a table. "HEY!" Lilie scolded him, though it was too late. The camera panned over to Jeff in a battle pose, looking directly at his frog. "I know your style, Pond-Side Green Beast," Jeff muttered, as if he were about to duel with the frog. The camera went to the frog, who only made noises at him. Jeff jumped up in the air, as did the frog. Right when it looked like Jeff was about to capture the frog, they hit each other in the forehead. Jeff knocked the frog out with his harder forehead. "HA! That's how you do it in Canada, dude!" Jeff happily shouted. He picked up his frog and walked over to where Ryan was. Later, Katherine and Stefani were seen, cornering their two frogs. They both jumped into the corner of the room, trying to capture the frog. One frog jumped out of the way, causing both Katherine and Stefani to grab the other that didn't hop off. "It's mine!" Katherine said, pulling the frog her way. "I thought I got it first," Stefani mentioned, yanking the frog closer to her. Katherine quickly thought on her feet and pointed behind Stefani, "Look! A kid dying!!" "Oooh, where!?" Stefani reluctantly said, letting go of the frog. Katherine ran off towards the table. "Suckaaaaaaa," she said under her breath.

Stefani: (staring into the camera for about 6 seconds) ...... Darn you, Katherine.

The camera switched scenes again to everyone but Lilie and Stefani at a table with Chris and their frogs. Lilie finally came into the picture with her frog, looking horrible. "What happened to you?" Nalyd asked her. Lilie dropped her frog on the table and put a small box over it and ignored Nalyd. Stefani also came into view, with her frog in her closed hands. "Okay, all the frog-catchers are here!" Chris beamed, "Time to have a snack! Or... if you want... a frog attack!  First one to finish their business can take either Nalyd or Terry's invincibility!  Ready... and.... GO!!"

Nalyd and Terry watched as everyone tried on deciding what they would do. On the top edge of the table everyone was on were scalpels and forks & knives. Jeff chose his scalpel and tries making an incision on the frog. As he was doing that, the camera went over to Katherine who was confused. She looked at her frog, who was now unconscious or dead. "Gosh, which one should I do?" Katherine wondered. "Why don't you just eat it?" Ryan told her, "It'll be just like kissing Jeff!" Katherine eyed him, "What's that supposed to mean??" "Oh, come on! You almost have his whole head in your mouth when you're sucking skin with him!" Katherine sighed, ignored Ryan and grabbed her scalpel. "Ayyyy-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye-ye!!" she let out a battle cry, and began chopping up the frog. The smell of the frog's insides got to Jeff. He sniffed it, and immediately passed out, forfeiting the challenge. The camera only went over to Ryan next to see that he was only thinking about what he should do. Next, it went to Lilie. "Now!" she said to herself. She lifted the box she put her frog in and immediately cut it's head off, making sure it was dead. Blood splattered everywhere on Lilie. "Ewwwww, ew, ew, ew, ew!!" she cried, "How are you doing, Stefani? Stefani??" The camera went over to Stefani's area, but she wasn't there. It then went a little further to show Stefani reading a death magazine. "I'm not doin' that chiz," she told Lilie. "Whoa. She's feisty!" Chris looked at her, "It looks like only Katherine, Ryan, and Lilie are still in this thing!"

"Finished!" Katherine yelled out. Chris went over to view Katherine's frog, but only sees the remains of it. "Uhh... I don't know if that counts as... dissected," Chris wondered to himself. At that point while Chris was distracted, Ryan hid his frog under the table. "But, I'm finished!" Ryan beamed. Chris walked over to Ryan, "Where's your frog?" Ryan pointed to his stomach and showed Chris his clean tongue. "No way!! You actually ate it!?" Chris asked him, "You actually downed that slimy, grotesque, green-as-puke, spotte--" Ryan closed Chris's mouth and almost puked. "Can we just get on with this!?" he threw out. Chris cleared his throat, "Ryan wins immunity! And, someone's about to lose theirs!" Right then, a 'ribbit'-esque noise start humming from behind the table, and right after that, four loud thumps, courtesy of Ryan slamming the frog unconscious under the table. "What was that?" Chris wondered. Ryan grinned, "What was what?" Scratching his head, Chris ignored it, "Nothing... I guess. Uhh... Pick your froggy poison, dude," "Well, Nalyd creazes me... and Terry's in my alliance. But, then again, Nalyd creazes me... though I'm supposed to protect Terry.  Gee, this decision is sooooo har-- Nalyd, please," Ryan wittily said.

Nalyd: (uncaring) Ooh, oh, ow, like I totally didn't see that coming.

"Ryan now has immunity! And, Nalyd... You're officially on the chopping block!  Everyone, head down to the D-Hall room for tonight's vote-out!" Chris told everyone. Ryan began smiling as Nalyd rolled his eyes. Ryan poked Nalyd's nose, "Say goodbye to the million!"

Everyone was then seen present in the Detention Hall Ceremony. Chris opened the door and came in with 6 Golden A+s. "I have 7 schoolmates sitting in front of me, but, alas, only 6 golden, genuine, and scrumptious A+s on a tray here in my hand. Let's find out who's going to be stay and be stoked... and who's about to flop and croak." The camera then began switching scenes between the Detention Hall Ceremony and the confessional votes.

Stefani: It's only because he was so obnoxious. (votes in the confessional)

"The first Golden A+ goes to Stefani," Chris continued. He threw the A+ at her.

Ryan: I think it's best we get rid of this.... How should I put this? (air quotes) "Menace to.... society". (votes for someone in the confessional)

"Ryan gets the second A+.... followed by Jeff," Chris threw the Golden A+s respectively.

Jeff: (sleeping and snoring in confessional) Katherine: All the while, I never even thought to get rid of this person.

"Terry and Katherine! You two are also safe!" Chris yelled, throwing them their awards, "Well, well, well, Lilie & Nalyd!"

Terry: Do I like the decision I made? Kinda. Did I make it myself? Not really. Lilie: He left me no choice but to vote for him. Yeah... I said him. Nalyd: He's so lucky I didn't get a chance to unleash my revenge on him! (grumbles) Terry, Nalyd, & Lilie: (three way, split-screen confessional; both of them vote for someone)

"Well. It's time to end this!  And, the final Golden A+ goes to....," Chris began. The camera went over to Nalyd, who was rolling his eyes again, then to Lilie, who was looking confident. "LILI--" Chris was stopped by a ringing cellphone. Chris answered it, "Hello? Uh-huh....... Uh-huh...... But, th--....... Uh-huh..... No way, you scored that?!  Sweet!-- "Will you get on with it!? I'm ready for Pale-o to finally leave here!" Ryan shouted. Chris hung up the cellphone, "That was one of the show's producers. Turns out, for some reason, we can't eliminate someone this week. It throws our pattern outta-whack.... Sorry!" "Sorry!? That's all you have to say!?" "Uhh.... Yeah?" Ryan looked over at Nalyd, who was sinisterly looking back at Ryan.

Nalyd: (evilly) Ohhhhhhh, it's go-time, punk.

"Hmm... Tension. It smells so good!" Chris said, still in the D-Hall room, "With Nalyd not-eliminated and still in the game, what will become of him, Ryan, and all the other idiots that are still in this game?!" "You know we're still here, don't you, dude?" Jeff wondered. Chris shook his head, "Find out next time on Total... Drama.... 1-0-1!"

Chapter Twenty: Mach Seven
"Biology, the study of life.... or death, for us," Chris started his introduction, laughing, "In an attempt to find the secret room where the challenge would be located last week, Ryan's since of direction got everyone but Terry totally lost. He sent Terry on his own way to try finding where this mystery room, and, wouldn't you know it, he found it... only to be freaked out by my corpse on the ground.  Anyway, long story short, Jeff slept, Katherine was actually quite sane then, Lilie tried to assume the leadership role for the bazillionth time, Nalyd and Ryan continued their bickering, and Stefani was our new Noah, heh.  In a fit of rage from earlier crying about Tammi's elimination a while back, Ryan swore to finally get rid of Nalyd this week.  Just when that was about to happen,  life was put back into Nalyd when I got a call from a producer, saying that last week had to be a non-elimination episode. Now that Nalyd knows Ryan's plans, will he ever take his real revenge on Nalyd? Will Jeff continue to slip 'n' sleep through the competition? Will Terry ever learn that Ryan is a nightmarish shlep? Will I stop asking you questions?! The answer to that last one is yes, as for the others.... stay tuned to more Total... Drama... 1-0-1!"

After the theme song, the camera zoomed in on a closed confessional door.

Nalyd: Remember when I said 'I'll have my revenge'? Yeah... I just found the perfect way to do it. Jeff: There's something fishy going on here, dudes. And, everything just gets more and more awkward when Nalyd and Ryan come into a room. You think it has something to do with them? Katherine: Nalyd was talking to me earlier today about finally getting rid of Ryan. I like his plans. Now I feel bad that I voted for him last week. Lilie: It's common-math. Nalyd plus Ryan equals tension and awkwardness to the power of...... 30. Ryan: Nervous? No. Scared? Not really. It's kinda obvious now that Nalyd's out to get me. Time to crank it up another notch.

The Final Seven were in the cafeteria, waiting on their challenge having already finished breakfast. Nalyd and Ryan were evilly staring at each other. "Sooooo...," Jeff said, trying to get a conversation going. Katherine shut his lips, "Babe... It's not going to work. Don't even try." "Uhh..." Lilie began thinking about what to say, and tried to reminisce, "Anybody remember Chuck?" "Who?" everyone said, simultaneously. "Nevermind." Nalyd and Ryan were still staring at each other.

Terry: I thought it would be awesome to be in the Final Seven! But.... Right now, it's a whole lot of tensed nerves. Some people need massages or something.

"Do you two have anything to say?!" the quiet Stefani wondered about Nalyd. "Evil elf," Nalyd told Ryan. "Manipulating shrew," Ryan responded. At that point, the two of them just kept throwing insults at the other. "Ignoramus!" Nalyd started again. "Ignorant!" Ryan replied. "Moron!" "Nerd!" "Dork!" "Geek!" "Idiot-boy!" "Bone-head!" "FLAT-head!!" Ryan sharply gasped and calmly, but angrily, said, "Oh, you did not just say that." Nalyd stood up, "So what if I did!?" An angry Lilie spoke up, "You guys gonna actually fight or make-out!?"

Right after that, Chris literally drove into the school cafeteria in an eight-seated go-cart/tour guide vehicle mix and nearly ran over Katherine, who had gotten up to get something to drink. She jumped out of the way and landed on a nearby table. "What a rush!" Katherine shouted, "Do it again!" Ignoring Katherine, Chris started with his usual beginning speech, "Welcome to the Final Seven!" "We've kinda been the Final Seven for about a couple weeks, now," Ryan corrected him. "Whatever. Legal says I have to say something about how far you gotten and how much I really care about it," Chris told them.

Chris: As if I do. (snickers)

"If you can't tell by my obvious clue, then I need to tell you that today's challenge subject i--" Chris, again, was interrupted. "Driver's Ed!" Terry shouted, happily, "Awesome!"

Terry: Something doctors can't explain to me is the fact that I have abnormally amazing driving skills. I started driving when I was about 7 years old. I even had my first illegal race when I was 10. (laughs) I.... lost, but still, it was cool!

"Someone's excited," Chris eyed Terry, "Everyone, get in the Chris-mobile here... yeah, I did just say 'Chris-mobile'... and I'll give you the ropes with this." Nalyd tried getting into the Chris-mobile first, but Ryan pushed him out of his way. "Oh. No, no, no, no.  I get the passenger seat.  You can... have the back, what you're used to," Ryan scolded Nalyd. Suddenly on the ground because of the push, Nalyd got up and wiped the dirt off of his hoodie and pants and climbed in. Jeff and Katherine, next, climbed in, obviously sitting next to each other. Lilie sat with Nalyd, and Stefani and Terry chose the back seat. In the Chris-mobile, Chris was in the driver's seat, Ryan in the passenger, Lilie and Nalyd in the next area, followed by Jeff and Katherine, and Stefani and Terry in back.

"Class," Chris started, "Driver's Ed is that thing you take at school so you can get your permit or license to drive a legal vehicle. It's not all about jacking someone's car, stealing someone's car parts, or racing to get to some imaginary finish line." The camera panned behind Chris to show everyone letting out a sigh of relief. "However, just because this class is Driver's Education, that doesn't mean that stuff won't happen. In fact, I hope it does happen!" Chris told them. At that point, many gasps were heard. "Here we are!" Chris said, stopping at Room 308. He opened the door to show that the room was a lot bigger inside than it looked outside.

Inside the Driver's Education room were many ornaments and car decorations. In the center of the room, a giant oval-shaped raceway was located with seven gigantic objects, protected by covers, in the center of the oval. "O-M-G! We're racing!?" Terry shouted happily. "Thank you, Captain Obvious," Chris told him, "But, here's how it works. There are 8.... uhhh..... vehicles under those sheets over there, and it's your choice to choose one.  The tricky thing is... some of the vehicles are more tricked out than others are!  The vehicles are not currently seen by the naked eye right now, so it's all about luck right now!" Secretly, Nalyd pulled out a pair of X-Ray glasses from his hoodie's pocket. "Luck's got nothing to do with it," he whispered, putting the glasses on. Chris turned around immediately to see this, took the glasses, and crunched them. Nalyd gasped, "Dude! You didn't have to destroy them!!" ".... I don't care. Anyway... Like I said, it's completely random, so I suggest you all go up to your vehicles in an orderly fas--" "Let's gooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!" Katherine yelled out. The Final Seven, then, trampled Chris, ran into the Driver's Ed room, and began choosing vehicles.

In order, the people next to their vehicles were as followed and shown:

Terry: I chose the middle cover. I think the tricked out one would be the one that sticks out the most, and.... to me.... that was the cover in the middle. Ryan: 6 has always been a lucky number of mine. Plus, my parents say I have a keen sixth sense of luck. I can't explain it, but I was treated like a god when I was younger. I tossed a penny in a water fountain before and found 20 bucks 5 seconds later. Granted... I found them in some old dude's wallet and had to take it from him...... but I found it! Nalyd: Right now, I can only help that Ryan doesn't win immunity today. I have got to win this!

"Everyone got their ride chosen?" Chris shouted to them, walking over to the racecourse. "Yes!" they all shouted out in unison. Chris raised his hand, then lowered it after saying, "Alright, take it off!"

Nalyd: That's... Katherine: ... what... Jeff: ... she.... Terry: SAID! (laughs and falls out of the chair)

Everyone unmasked their vehicles to see that they all had a number ranged from 1 to 7 located somewhere on it. Terry's vehicle had a 1 on its side. He seemed to have the tricked-out vehicle; a motorcycle equipped with many mini-nitrous oxide boosters, a greater horsepower, and a painted body. Jeff's vehicle was a sports car with a 2 on its side, equipped only with a great amount of horsepower. Stefani's vehicle, which had a 3 on its side, was just a regular and standard car with no extensions. Katherine's vehicle had a 4, and, when uncovered, was only shown to be a standard truck. Lilie, with a 5 on her vehicle's side, was a standard van, with 2 missing wheels and a missing car top. Next was Nalyd, with a 6 on his vehicle's side. His was a sports utility vehicle with only one wheel on it, literally. And, lastly was Ryan. His vehicle wasn't really a vehicle. With a 7 on its side, Ryan's vehicle was only a tricycle with one wheel on it and no handlebars.

"What the heck do you call this trash?!" Ryan shouted at Chris. "Uhh... A Dumpster tricycle?" Chris responded.

Jeff: I gotta say, I'm pretty stoked for this. That sports car is.... (with small tears in his eyes) my dre-e-e-e-eam car.

The scenes changed to everyone, at the starting line of the racetrack. "Welcome... to the McLean-adega Raceway!" Chris said to the Final Seven. The camera went to Terry, ready on his motorcycle. "Let's do this!!" Terry yelled.

Terry: I have never been this... this... pumped! First place is mine!

The camera then went over to Jeff, wide-awake. "It's the race of the century!" Jeff said to everyone.

Jeff: I figured out the number system on our cars, I think. Terry's got a number one on his motorcycle and... he has a motorcycle! So, he has a serious advantage. Ryan has... a junkyard tricycle, meaning he has the worst luck with that seven on his. Mine has a two on it, so I think Terry's going to be my only competition. Bro's goin' down!

Stefani remained quiet when the camera went to her.

Stefani: ...

"Go time! Go time! Go time!" Katherine chanted.

Katherine: (still chanting) Go time! Go time! Go time! Go time! Go time! Go time! Go time! Go time! Go time! Go-- (confessional cut off) Lilie: Is this (bleep) even fair?! I have half a van to race in!! Come on!

Nalyd was then seen rubbing his hands together evilly.

Nalyd: This is going to be the best challenge ever! And, no... I don't mean it's because I'm still going to win!

A confident Ryan was then shown on his broken-down tricycle, ready to 'race'. "Let's get this over with," he calmly said to Chris.

"Well, alright then, first one that laps around the raceway 35 times will get yo--" Chris was interrupted by Ryan, starting with the race, trying to get a head start. "Hey! Get back here!" Lilie started her van engine and began scooting down the raceway. Lilie easily past him and became the leader. The rest of the schoolmates, then, rocketed out of the starting line. Terry immediately past everyone and gained first place with Jeff right behind him. Behind the two of them, Katherine, Lilie, and Stefani vied for the third place position with Nalyd and Ryan excruciatingly behind them all.

"Get back here, you wannabe player!" Jeff yelled at Terry. Jeff easily passed Terry after that comment. Katherine, then, tried to help Jeff win. She got in front of Terry with her truck and literally stopped it in front of Terry's motorcycle, causing him to crash in Katherine's truck. The two of them skid off the raceway. Katherine's truck was totaled on the front and left side, permanently stalling the engine; however, the crash did nothing with Terry's motorcycle. "Take that, Terry!" Katherine yelled at him. Terry immediately restarted his motorcycle and was back in the game. "What!?" Katherine yelled to herself. Terry looked behind him, "Too bad, so sad, sweetie!" With Terry utterly behind, he was now in between Nalyd and Ryan. Not looking where he was going, he crashed, yet again, into Nalyd and skewed the both of them off-course. Ryan easily passed the two of them. "Suckers!" he yelled out to the both of them, scooting his way on. "You're the sucker, dude!" Jeff said, still in first place. Once again, due to Terry's vehicle being in great condition, he got back into the game, in last place.

By lap 20, the rankings were Jeff in first place, Lilie in second place, Stefani in third place, Ryan in fourth place, and Terry in last due to Katherine and Nalyd's vehicles being out of disrepair. Jeff was still cruising in his sports car. He looked in his side view mirror to see Lilie was gaining on him. Panicking, he began looking in his car for something to use. He, then, eyed a banana peel. He let his driver seat window down. "Fire!!!" Jeff yelled. He threw the banana peel in Lilie's van's way. "Ha!" She said, "You think that's gonna stop me?!" Lilie ran over the banana peel but, unfortunately, skid out of control and began spinning rapidly in her van on the raceway. Ryan, right behind her, began pedaling toward Lilie, trying to avoid her. He pulled to the right, but Lilie's van went to the right. Ryan pulled to the left, right when Lilie's van pulled to the left.

Ryan: UGH! Lilie and her giant soccer-mobile couldn't choose which way she wanted it to go! I had no choice but to wing it...

Ryan scooted head on into the potential hazard, and hit Lilie's van. The both of them skewed off-course, heading for Terry. Coming down to the very last lap, Terry ignited his tricked-out nitrous oxide booster and rammed into Lilie and Ryan, making them both fly severely off course and into a wall of the Driver's Education room.

Ryan: (with a checklist) Don't ever choose the "Wing-It!" option..... Check. (confessional cut off)

Terry was still using his nitrous oxide booster, and, right at the end of it all, passed Jeff and crossed the finish line for the 35th time in first place, giving Jeff second, and Stefani third. Chris was then seen waiting there with an angry face, tapping his foot on the ground. "Yes! I win!!" Terry yelled out. Chris buttoned Terry's lips up, "Uh... I'm not so sure about that!" Coming out of all the vehicle decay, a confused Ryan posed, "What? But.. he came in first place.  So... unless I have this race-thing completely backwards, that's how you win a race." Chris winked and began laughing, "Who said anything about a race?!" "What?" Terry stared at Chris in wide-eyes. "If you had let me finish telling you the challenge, you would have known that I was going to say that the producers wanted something unexpected to happen this week with the challenge. So... What I was going to say was that the first one around the McLean-adega Raceway wins you... a boot-print in the butt!  In other words, an elimination that will go down in all the driving manuals!"

Terry was still staring at Chris, "......... What???" "Terry. Since you didn't listen to the challenge, you've been shockingly eliminated!" Chris told him. Jeff gasped, Ryan looked shocked, Katherine and Stefani put their hands over their mouths, and Nalyd looked evilly at Terry.

Nalyd: Hey. It's not how I planned it, but step one of 'Nalyd's Awesomely Amazing & Complete Plan' has been complete. Heheh, the 'N.double-A.C.P.' will be a great success. Terry, you're a cool person, but.... you gots 't go!

The Final Seven were then seen shown outside of Gilded Glory, watching Terry leave. "Well... It's not how I expected to leave. In fact, I didn't expect to leave," Terry said confidently. "Some people just don't know how to listen with their ears, bro," Chris said out to them all. Terry walked over to Stefani, "You've been pretty quiet today." "There's not much to say," she told him. "Oh." "Yeah." "Well, I hope you go far in the game." "Yeah, whatever." Terry quickly thought on his feet and looked into Stefani's eyes, "Have I done something to upset you?" "No?" "Well.... Okay, then," Terry grabbed Stefani and dipped her as if he were about to dance with her, "I can gaze into your deep, beautiful eyes for millenniums upon millenniums, but alas, I must leave. I don't care if you have this 'Jordan' fellow in your life, but I love you, your moods, and everything about you.  Your eyes shine brighter than all the stars in the night sky.  I--" Chris interrupted Terry and grabbed him, causing Stefani to fall, since Terry let go of her body. Stefani laid there, victim of a faint from Terry's words. "Wait!! WAIT!! Stefani! I'll never forget you!" Terry said, confidently once more. "Dude! That was beautiful!  And... You're not nervous!" Jeff added, yelling at Terry. While Chris was carrying Terry off the schoolgrounds, he manually waved his hands in his face to see if they would shake automatically... They didn't. "Hey! Hey, you're right!!  I'm not nervous!  I can-- I--" Terry was thrown out of Gilded Glory. "And, with that, we are down to Six! What will become of everyone after the lovable, yet annoying bundle of flirty joy raced out of here!?  Find out in our next shocking elimination of Total... Drama... 1-0-1!!  FINISH!" Chris yelled, as the camera faded to black.

Chapter Twenty One: Econo-moron-ics
"Last time, on Total Drama 101!" Chris announced, in front of Gilded Glory, "Ahhh, nothing revs my engine up more than four tires skidding across a raceway on a beautiful day here in Vancouver's Driver's Education class. Heh, but that's not what these racing wannabes were using!  Lilie's hopes of winning were stalled as her van took a turn for the worse in our race!  And, Katherine's Truck was.... not really... a truck.  Too bad for her!  The only thing I thought was suited for one contestant to drive in... or should I say 'use to cycle ' was Ryan's totally rad tricycle!  And, by 'totally rad tricycle', I mean 'incredibly broke-down Dumpster food'!" Chris began laughing, "The only person that any normal person in a normal race to the finish would think is safe in a challenge like this would be Terry in his tricked-out moto-buddy! Unfortunately, I'm Chris McLean.  Wait... That actually is fortunate.  But, the unfortunate thing is, I don't do normal races.  Thanks to not listening to the instructions, Romeo got eliminated, but not without saying something deliciously romantic to passenger-seat Stefani.  There's an even half-dozen left, and after tonight... there will only be... the Final Five.  Who's takin' a dive, you may ask!?  Find out... right here, right now, on Total.... Drama.... 1. 0. 1!"

After the theme song ended, the camera faded in to show everyone in the cafeteria in their own pace. Jeff and Nalyd were shown coming in. "I've been thinking," Nalyd walked in with Jeff. "About?" "Things." "What kind of things?" "Competition-things." "Oh........................... Cool." "Uh-huhhh," Nalyd slowly and dramatically walked away from Jeff. The camera panned back to Jeff, who was looking at the back of Nalyd's head, wondering.

Jeff: If it's one thing I don't really like that much, it's juicy secrets. But, only if I'm not apart of them, dudes. I gotta know what he's thinking about.

Jeff walked back over to Nalyd and put his arm around Nalyd's shoulders. "So, Nalyd... My good buddy 'n' bro, Nalyd," Jeff told him. "These are all true. Yes?" Nalyd responded. Jeff rolled his eyes, trying to think of what to say without it sounding obvious, "Uhhhh...." "Yeeeeeees?" Nalyd pressured him. "What the heck are you thinking about?!" Jeff said over-excitedly and immediately covered his mouth. "Glad you asked," Nalyd wittingly spoke, prepared that Jeff would ask, "You see, it--" "Gooooooooooood afternoooooooooooooooooon, everyoooooooooooooooone!" Stefani happily, yet creepily shouted from the cafeteria entrance, "Isn't today just the most super-fun, extra-special, nifty, splend-iferous day everrrrrrrrrrrrr?" Jeff and Nalyd looked at each other, then back to Stefani. "Uhh... It's just your average Friday, dude," Jeff told her. Stefani went over and played with Jeff's nose, then poked it. "But, you're not our average boy, now, are you, Jeffy-Weffy?" Stefani said, with hearts in her eyes.

Jeff: Jeffy-Weffy? What was that about?

Lilie and Ryan came in right after Stefani, arguing. "Gasp!" Lilie vocally said, "You eliminated Terry, didn't you!?" "What!? I had nothing to do with that idiot." Ryan told her. "Did so!" "Did not!" "Did so!" "Did.... not."

Nalyd: (smacks lips) Psh. Yeah....... But, I should have! (grumbles) Ryan: Okay. I'm really starting to get tired of her attitude. She is on thin-ice!

"Ever since Tammi left, you've been, like, completely stupid!" Ryan shunned her. ".... You did not just call me stupid." "Oh, yea--" "Guyssssssssssssss," Stefani interrupted them, giggling, "You shouldn't be fi-iiiiiiiiiiiin' (fightin'), you should be luh-innnnnnn' (lovin')!  It's, like totally, the best feeling everrrrrrrrrrrrr."

Stefani: (holds final syllable) Luh-innnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn-- (confessional cut off)

Stefani rushed up to the cameraman, grabbed his camera, and started speaking into it, "I loverz you, Terry.... Loverz and loverz and loverz youuuuuuuuuuuu! Oh, and Jordan.... You ain't half the man Terry is, so we're through! ...... You's ain't that good in be--"  She stopped began kissing the lens of the camera, thinking about Terry, leaving lipstick lip-prints on the camera. The cameraman, then, got the camera back, wiped it off, and pushed Stefani back with the rest of the group. "Dumb teenagers," the cameraman said in the background.

Ryan began mocking Stefani, "No thank you. I, like totally, don't want to be 'luh-innnnnnnnn' her." "C'monnn, it's easy!" Stefani lovingly said, dragging herself over to Ryan, "You just do this!" Stefani grabbed Ryan's head. "... What are you doing?" Ryan asked her. Stefani, then, shushed him. After that, she grabbed Lilie's head, then banged them both together. Lilie and Ryan's lips met at that point. They both immediately pushed back at each other. "Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!" They both shouted. "Seeeeeeeeeeeeeeee???? Easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy-my-auntie's-namey's-Aunt-LeShezzie!" "Can someone get her some meds?!" Jeff yelled off-screen. In response to that, someone threw a titanium first-aid kit at Jeff, knocking him out for a few seconds.

Right after that, a piece of paper flew into the cafeteria and landed in the center of where the schoolmates where standing. Jeff picked it up to see it was a light blue color with a picture of Chris smiling in the middle of it and the number '100' on all four of it's sides, to resemble a $100 bill. "Whooooooa, did Chris, like, become President?" Jeff asked everyone. Ryan took the paper from Jeff, "Gimme that!" He looked at it throughly, then tossed it on the ground. "It's fake. Chris was never President....... he's not smart enough, anyway," Ryan began to head for the cafeteria's door when Chris appeared out of nowhere in a puff of smoke, blocking the door. Ryan coughed, "What is that crap? Noxious fumes!?" "Maybe, maybe not," Chris told him, "and b.t.w, I heard that comment about me not being smart. If I wasn't so smart, would I be hosting the awesome-st show ever...." The camera zoomed out with every word of the show's title, "Total... Drama.... 1-0-1!?" Ryan rolled his eyes.

Ryan: Of course you would. It shows that you can't get anything better. (smiles) I think he'd get a lot more money if he took over Lilie's position at her usual street corner. (chuckles)

"Schoolmates, if you will, can you six follow m-- Wait.... Where's Katherine?" Chris wondered. At that point, Katherine, who somehow got a vine tied into the cafeteria came swinging down. "Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh-ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" she yelled, doing a front flip before touching the ground. "Izzy much?" Ryan asked her. "17-Year-Old-Girly-Wimp-In-a-13-Year-Old-Tub-Of-Lard-ish-Body much?" Katherine winked at him, then went over to Jeff. She hugged him, then, looked back at Ryan, "See? I don't say things that are obviously true about you, so you shouldn't either, sweetie. "Enough with the chitty-chatty," Chris told them, "Follow me."

As the Final Six headed outside, Chris began explaining the milestone that they had all reached. "Welcome to the Final Six of Total... Drama.... 1-0-1! It's been a grueling 5 months here in good ol' Gilded Glory.  And, when I think about these 5 months... I think about the unfortunate yahoos that didn't make it the whole way to this beloved spot..... I mean, seriously!!"

The confessional came on as Chris's voice was heard in a voice-over. Chris: Brandon, (Brandon is shown with his bags at the beginning of Total Drama 101) Chuck, (Chuck is shown throwing an apple at the camera before it flashes to the next person)

Liz, (Liz is shown laughing at a joke Nalyd told her)

Gretel, (Gretel is shown running to catch up to her team in the McLean's Math Maze) Alyssa, (Alyssa is shown storming out of the school) Nalyd, (Nalyd is shown singing and dancing to Never Gonna Give You Up by Rick Astley)

Dedrek, (Dedrek is shown getting slammed by mashed potatoes) Lilie, Carter, (Lilie and Carter are shown in split screen singing)

Katherine, (Katherine is shown with frizzy hair after Samantha's chemical explosion) Johnathan, (Johnathan is shown slipping and sliding on Gilded Glory's Home Economics kitchen) Webby, (Webby is shown tangled in a boot camp obstacle)

Zach, (Zach is shown throwing a textbook at the camera right before it flashes to the next person)

Samantha, (Samantha is shown rocketing out of Gilded Glory) Ariel, (Ariel is shown tripping on his own feet) Dedrek again, (Dedrek is shown leaving Gilded Glory) Tammi, (Tammi is shown being lied to by Ryan)

and... Terry! (Terry is shown racing in the McLean-adega Raceway as the confessional cuts off)

"Only 6 schoolmates remain, and they're all about this close to losing it!" Chris finished, stopping at a random spot outside of Gilded Glory. "Uhh... Season one much?" Lilie asked him. "Maybe, maybe not," Chris replied, "but what I do know is your next challenge! Anyone know what the word 'Economics' means?" Lilie raised her hand high and began jumping up and down, making 'ooh' noises. Ignoring Lilie, Chris asked, ".... Anyone? Anyone at all?" "Oooh!! Oooh! Chris, I do!" Lilie yelled. "Anyyyyyyyybody?" "Oooooh! Ooooooooooooooooooooooooh!!" "I bet Terry would know about it," Stefani interrupted, "I miss him." "Oooooooooooh!" Lilie kept going. Chris sighed, "Lilie?" "Economics is--" "Oh, too bad, your .75 seconds is up to answer! So... I'll answer for us!  Economics is all about money!  Nothing but the cheddar!!" Lilie stopped him, "Actually, Chris, economics is mo--" "Well, it's about money today, Lilie!" Chris shouted at her, "your Final Six task is to think of an item, your choice in making it or choosing something that's already been made, and going out into the real world to sell this item!" "... What do you mean by 'real world'?" Jeff pondered. "I mean... the real world, outside the expensive walls of this place," Chris informed him, "If you think about it, you guys are cast out of society by staying here." "You don't say?" Ryan sarcastically mumbled under his breath.

Lilie: This challenge was custom-ly made for me. Economics? Business? Business girl!? They should just give me the win for this one!

The camera switched scenes to everyone on a street outside of Gilded Glory. "It's crunch time!" Chris announced to them all. "Prepare to lose to my business smarts!" Lilie exclaimed. Ryan rolled his eyes.

Ryan: Lilie. Lilie. Really! This is the only person I have left in my alliance. Heaven knows Terry wasn't going to get this far, but still... Lilie!? I need some more people.

"Okay, I need each of you to come up with an item. Best item I hear gets a small advantage to the actual item-selling challenge!" Chris announced, "I'm gonna give you all a few minutes out here to think of an item, and I'll call you all back to this location to ask for your item! Make sure it blows me away.... and your future customers."

The camera switched scenes to show Katherine, pacing outside. "Hmm, what to use, what to use?" she said to herself. "One lemonade, please!" a little girl said off-screen. Katherine turned around to see the little girl purchasing a cup of lemonade at a lemonade stand, belonging to someone else. She watched as the little girl sipped the lemonade and looked delightfully at the lemonade stand owner. "Hmmmmmmmm...." Katherine wondered, "Nah, too simple." Katherine continued pacing until she stepped on a thumbtack. "OW!!!........................ Cool!" she yelled out randomly, "The pain's engorging!" Katherine raised her shoe to dig the thumbtack out of it, put her hand on her chin and began thinking, "Hmm.... A spike in the road."

The camera panned a few yards over to Lilie, sitting down Indian-style under a tree, brainstorming ideas on a sketchpad.

Lilie: (shows sketchpad to the screen, the sketched pad has a crude drawing of Lilie on it) This challenge is mine. I'm only using this sketchpad as a ploy if Chris comes up and questions me about something. (takes out cellphone) I've already called my dad's company, (puts it back in her pocket) they're working on something as we speak. (chuckles) Like I said... this challenge is mine. He told me they were already working on some kind of primo candy and he was going to give me rights to it. Do I have the rocking-est daddy or what!? (smiles)

Lilie continues drawing as the camera goes over to Ryan. Ryan picked up a rock, "Stones? No." Ryan threw the stone behind him. The camera followed the stone, as it hit a little boy behind Ryan. "Oh, my gosh!" a passing man said, looking at the passed-out kid. A woman came up behind the man. "Is he injured!?" the man wondered. "Boulders? Noooo," Ryan said, throwing a bigger rock behind him. The boulder hit the passed-out child. "I think that did it," the woman sarcastically added. The woman looked at the man and vice-versa. Then, the two of them looked at the kid on the ground, and both of them, at the same time, walked off nonchalantly. Ryan, not knowing any of the preceding happened, kept searching for something on the ground to sell to his customers.

Ryan: This is pathetic. I can't find anything to sell. It'd be a lot easier to just sell newspapers talking about Jeff's foot fungus... or Nalyd's fear of the sun... or Ste-- (Ryan stops talking and begins thinking) Hmm.... (confessional cut off)

Ryan was then seen running back into the mansion up to the Master Bedroom and grabbed multiple stacks of paper with a watermark of Ryan imprinted on all of them. "Best. Idea. Ever!" Ryan said to himself. He stopped in his room and began thinking. Ryan snapped his fingers, "(bleep)! Chris never told us where his room is." "The principal's office!" Ryan gasped, "Wait... Does Gilded Glory have a Principal's Office? Ugh!" Ryan ran out of the mansion and began sprinting to Gilded Glory.

The camera switched scenes to show Nalyd, thinking about what he was going to sell. He began shivering. "What the heck? It's, like, 80 degrees out here!  How can I be cold?" he muttered to himself, "I could use a Snuggie. Wait.  No.  Not a Snuggie... A--"  The camera switched scenes to show Jeff and Stefani together yards away from Nalyd. "Don't you just looooooooooooove this challenge, Jeffy?" Stefani slobbishly said to Jeff. "Uhh..... Yeah?" "I do, toooooooo. It's epiiiiiiiiiic."

Jeff: Stefani's starting to scare me. Dudes, she's living proof of someone being "love-crazy".

"I wonder what Terryyyyyyyy would think of," Stefani wondered. "Probably something stupid like chocolate lovey..... doveys." Jeff replied. Stefani sharply gasped, ran over to Jeff and kissed him on the cheek. "You're awesome!" Stefani shouted. Jeff blushed, "Tell me something I don't kno-- Wait, what? You're actually going to use that?!" "Yeahhhhhhhhhh, everyone loooooooooooves looooooooooove," Stefani told him. "Great, you have an idea, but I still need one." Jeff began looking around, and then saw a small booth with someone selling many foods, drinks, and other edible things. Jeff cocked an eyebrow and went over to the booth.

"Good afternoon, sir!" the booth owner said, positively to him. Jeff looked at him a tad deviously, "Good afternoon!" "What can I interest you in!? This is a mini-sandwich shop, but we have lots more other stuff!  We have all kinds of sides from chips to sauces to syrups!  The works!  Whaddaya want?!" "Uhh... Actually, I'd like one san-- Hey, what's that?" Jeff pointed behind the booth owner. The owner turned around. "I don't see anything, dude." Jeff began stealing the sandwiches and some condiments and stuffed them all in a huge bag he also stole. "What is it that I'm supposed to be looking at, man?" the owner asked Jeff, still not noticing Jeff. Jeff took multiple bags of chips, a few bottles of chocolate syrup, some ice cream, and baskets of fries. "Oh, it's a big.... thing! You can't miss it, dude!" Jeff said, still stuffing things into the big bag. "Oh, okay then!" the booth owner stupidly agreed and continued to look.

The camera jumped ahead of time to see Jeff's big bag crammed with many foods while the booth owner was still looking away, trying to find out what it is Jeff was 'looking' at. Jeff stopped cramming his bag right when the booth owner finally turned around, "Well, I couldn't see it." "Oh.... Must have just been my eyes playing tricks on me, bro," Jeff lied, "Well, see ya!" Jeff ran off with the bag. "Wait, didn't you want a sandwich!?" the booth owner shouted after him.

Jeff: Oh, I got plenty of those. (chuckles)

The camera switched scenes to show Ryan again, running around in Gilded Glory looking for the alleged 'Principal's Office'. "Where is this stupid room!?" Ryan said to himself, running. Ryan, then, literally ran into a door after looking to his right. He fell down, as the camera zoomed in on the door Ryan ran into, showing that the door read 'Principal's Office'.

Ryan: (smiling) So, to the stupid $5-a-week-making construction workers that made this incredibly crazy maze of a school, let me tell you.... (yelling and frowning) get the Principal's Office in a place that I don't run into! I'm too important for running into doors! Ugh!

Ryan set the large stacks of paper down outside of the room, and was then shown creeping into the Principal's Office. He tiptoed in a few feet and peered around to see that it was Chris McLean's quarters. Ryan saw many pictures of Chris posing, clothed and semi-naked. "Ew. Conceited people are so disgusting!" Ryan whispered to himself, "I would never be this conceited. I'm too good for it anyway." A recording of Chris McLean's voice was then heard, "Error Number 3-4-2-4-4: Intruder Alert!  Intruder Alert!  Leave the premises, you have 3 seconds!" "3 seconds!? Who can leave a place in 3 seco--" Ryan was cut off by many lasers coming through the walls of Chris's Office. "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!" Ryan screamed, dodging and juking through the lasers. As he kept avoiding each one, he looked to one of the office walls to find a desk with a laptop on top of it and a chair pushed into the desk. "Perfect!" Ryan ran over to the laptop, dodging and dancing his way past all the fast-shooting lasers. Right when he got to the computer, a laser shot Ryan's back. "(bleep)!" he said, covering his back. He unhooked the laptop's cords, stole the laptop and ran out of the room, grabbing the paper as he left.

Ryan: I thought the Principal's Office was supposed to be warm and inviting! I'm never going back to my own school again! The principal's probably out to get everyone there. I know. Like, 4 days before school was out last year, 13 people got detention hall because their names were signed all over the school walls with red permanent marker. They said they didn't do it, but all the stupid teachers and the principal found my dad's store markers in their back pockets. (deviously) I wonder who put them there? (chuckles, then gets serious) But that stupid principal is out to get all of us!

Ryan ran right back outside to where he was previously. Apparently, he was only trusting his feet as the laptop and large stacks of paper he was carrying covered his eyesight. A few seconds later, he literally bumped into Nalyd, and the two of them fell down. "Could you watch where you're go--" Ryan looked up to see that it was Nalyd he bumped into. Ryan quickly and immediately began brushing and dusting himself off, "Ew, ew, ew, ew! Nalyd-germs!! Ewwwwwww!" "Could you be any more like a girl?" Nalyd rolled his eyes at Ryan. "Co--" Chris blew an airhorn from a scenic distance. Ryan scoffed, "Ugh, you're lucky. I think that's Chris." Ryan picked up all of his papers, grabbed Chris' laptop and began walking in the direction Chris blew the airhorn in.

Nalyd: Oh, you can keep thinking you're the big dog, Ryan, but... (points to himself) after this plan hits Step 2, this guy is going to end up on top. Just wait... Just........ wait.

Nalyd followed Ryan, looking deviously at him as Ryan continued walking.

The camera switched scenes to show everyone, still outside of Gilded Glory, standing in a line in front of Chris. Everyone was standing still except for Stefani, who was swaying from side-to-side, thinking about Terry. Jeff still had his huge bag of stolen foods behind him. Katherine was seen next to him, with large glass jugs on the ground behind her, each with a full lemon inside the jug. Lilie and Nalyd were seen empty-handed. Ryan was sitting on the ground, typing some things up on Chris' laptop in plain sight of Chris. Lastly, Stefani was seen swaying, with a few dozen candy boxes on the ground and in her hands. "Marketeers!!" Chris beamed, "I trust you all had enough time to gather your thoughts in what you wanted to sell to the outside world." "... Uhh, you only gave us 5 minutes, Chris," Jeff informed him. "Oh! Then, I gave you more-than-enough!" Chris chuckled, "Anyway, let's see what your economic brains came up with! Jeff, since you're first in our fake alphabet, you're first!" "Break a leg, surfer boy," Ryan said, still typing under his breath.

"Whaddaya got, bro?" Chris wondered, with his hand on his chin. "Sammiches," Jeff uttered, with a small slur. The camera went back to the rest of the schoolmates. "Hey, Lilie, can you make me one?" Nalyd asked her. Lilie scoffed and slapped Nalyd, sharply.

Lilie: What a chauvinistic remark! Ew! Nalyd: (rubbing his cheek) She hits hard. Geez, it was a joke.

"So, sandwiches?" Chris wondered, "What... kind of sandwiches?" Thinking on his feet, Jeff looked behind him to see the huge bag of foodstuffs. "Uhhhhh.... It's going to have a lot of ingredients, dude. Believe that," Jeff sheepishly remarked. "Okaaaay, then. You can leave." Jeff randomly saluted Chris, and then went back to his big bag of food. Chris pointed at Katherine, "You're next!"

Katherine waled up to Chris. "Hiiiiiiiiii!" she said, dancing her way up to Chris. "Nice moves," Chris approved, "Entrepeneurship is today's objective." Katherine stared blankly at Chris, "What's an objective?" "A principle, dudette." "...... What's a principle?" "A... job?" "What's a--" "Just show me what you have!" Katherine smiled, "Oh! Kay-kay.  I'm gonna..." "Yeah?" "... sell..." "Yeah?!" "... the best thing ever...." "Yeah, yeah, yeah!?" "Lemonade!!" Chris wiped the excited expression off his face, "Seriously?" "Well, yeah! That's always a crowd pleaser!" Katherine looked back at everyone else to see their reaction to her idea.

Nalyd: Hey, it's no bull market idea, but she's right. It is a crowd pleaser. Advantage: Katherine.

Lilie walked up to Katherine. "Great idea, girl!" she yelled in her ear. "Thank... you?" Katherine replied.

Katherine: That was weird. But, then again.... it is Lilie, heh, heh. Lilie: Hmm... It seems Ryan and I aren't on the best of terms right now. That's the only thing I've really been thinking of earlier. At the mo', he's the only person I'm counting on for protection right now.... Not that I need him, but.... (pause, looks awkwardly into the camera) Whatever, I believe in having an "Option B" in anything I'm involved with. Right now, my Option B is Katherine. It's one of the main things you need to have to be-- Nalyd, Ryan, Katherine, and Jeff: (outside the same confessional) A successful businesswoman! We ALL know! Lilie: (sighs)

"You'll be sure to win!" Lilie cheerily said to Katherine. Katherine high-fived her, "Thankies!" "Well, you girls can continue the BFF talk later," Chris told them, "Lilie, since you're already up here and after Katherine in our alphabet, you're next!" "Fair enough," Lilie told him. She grabbed her cellphone and speed-dialed someone and yelled into the cellphone, "NOW!" Chris and the schoolmates looked around where they were standing, expecting something to jump out at them. "Hup! Hup! Hup! Hup! Hup! Hup! Hup! Hup! Hup!" hired men in black said simultaneously, while sliding down rope from helicopters. Everyone looked up to see these men. All landed on the ground, and one landed on Nalyd's head, knocking him down. "What th--" Chris started, but was interrupted by one of the men instantly. "No time for questions, sir," the man in black stiffly and confidentially said to Chris. He quickly showed Chris a badge and, then, jerked it back to himself about a half a second later. The camera, then, panned over to four more of the men near Lilie, each carrying 8 shiny, golden briefcases. The man nearest to Lilie opened up the first of his 8 briefcases showing multiple sticks of gum. Chris peered over the shoulders of the men to see gum in the opened briefcase. "Gum!?" Chris laughed, "That's it?!" Lilie spoke up, "This isn't just any gum. It's packed with nutrients and juicy flavors so addicting, it'll have my customers coming back for more of it!  Like I said earlier, I come prepared for everything and this challenge is mine!" "Is that even fair?!" Jeff wondered out loud Instantly, another of Lilie's hired men came to Jeff's side and shoved a 100+ page document in his face. "We soooooo don't have time to read that, so... I'll just say 'it's allowed'!" Chris told everyone. Lilie began smiling as Nalyd rolled his eyes yet again. "Nalyd, you're up!" Chris told him.

Nalyd walked up to Chris and took out a full sack he had hidden in his hoodie. "What's in there?" Chris asked. "Introduciiiiiiiiiiing!!" Nalyd announced, "The Puggie!" Nalyd took a sample out of the sack by taking out one of the Puggies. "Dude, that's a Snuggie," Chris told him. Nalyd growled, "PUH-ggie! Patent pending." "And, you really think people are going to buy those?" "If they know what's best for them!" "Well, I must stupid, then," Ryan smugly said under his breath. Stefani stole one of Nalyd's Puggies and wrapped it around her. "O-M-G, this feels soooooooooo good," she babbled. "I know, right?" said Nalyd, happily, "These things are one-of-a-kind!" Katherine took out multiple Puggies out of the sack Nalyd had. "If they're one-of-a-kind, then how come I have more than one in my hand?" "Well that's bec-- You-- It's onl-- Y-- Could you just go back to your lemonade stand!?" Nalyd snapped at her.

Katherine: Psht. One-of-a-kind.

"Ryan, can you take a break from that computer for one second, so yo--" Chris eyed the laptop Ryan was on and gasped. "Hey, that's my laptop!" he yelled. Ryan looked at Chris, "What was your first clue?" "How did you get in my quarters!?" "Gasp!" Stefani verbally said, "You gots quarters?? Can-can I have some to get Terry a little sum'n-sum'n?" Chris sighed, "Not those kind of quart-- Stefani, why don't you just be quiet for the rest of the day, hmm?" "Okay. Oop!  I talked!  Oop, talked again!  Oop! D-- Oop!  Stop talking, Stefa-- Oop!" Stefani stuttered. "Can you just go 'oop' your mouth shut?!" Stefani remained silent. "As I was saying, Ryan, you're next."

Ryan: This game is still mine, it's not that hard to beat these freaks. But, I know some of them are smart. And, I use that very loosely. Still, some people may figure out what I'm doing if I say my idea out loud. No way am I risking that.

Ryan walked over to Chris and whispered in his ear. Chris gasped and quietly said back to Ryan, "You ain't got nothing on me, do ya?" Ryan shook his head 'no' and Chris gave him the thumbs up. "Stefani, I command you to speak now. What's your idea?" Chris asked her. Stefani remained silent. Chris smacked his forehead, "Stefaniiiiiiiiiiiii?" Again, Stefani stayed quiet. Jeff and Nalyd looked at each other and shrugged. The camera went over to Katherine, who was staring at Stefani with a confused look on her face. The camera panned to a very quiet Stefani. "Say something, Stefani!" Chris told her. Stefani, then, showed a note she had been holding the past few seconds to the camera. Jeff grabbed it, cleared his throat, and read it aloud, "A-hem. 'My idea of income is Chocolate Love Doves in honor of my beautiful Terry. And, Chris, if it just so happens that you are the one to read this aloud, stop talking.  I think it's too early for us all to go deaf over a loud, annoying noise.  So, I suggest you shutting up'.  Burn, dude!"

Lilie: (laughing) Jeff: (laughing harder)

"That's everyone, Chris, now what? Dying of boredom over here," Ryan wondered, closing Chris' laptop. "Well, now it's time for the real challenge! Selling your merchandise!  Basically, whoever makes the most money selling their stuff wins!  A--" "Wait!" Lilie stopped Chris, "Didn't you say the person with the best thing to sell gets an advantage?!" Chris groaned, "I was hoping you guys would forget that. Yeah, yeah, I really like Ryan's idea the best, so...." Chris walked over to Ryan, pulled out his own wallet, and gave him 50 American dollars. Ryan snatched them out of his hand, "Naturally." "What was his idea, you ask?" Chris told the schoolmates. The camera panned over to the schoolmates to see that most of them were shaking their heads 'yes'. Chris folded his arms, "Well, it's--" Ryan immediately ran up to Chris and covered his mouth making Chris' speech sound as if he were mumbling. "You'll find out later," Ryan winked. Ryan jerked his hands back, "Ew! Ewwww!" "Anyway," Chris continued, "as I was saying, whoever gets the most money selling their things after I call time, wins! And, Ryan has a huge advantage with $50.  Even though we are in Canada, we're using American money.... if there's even a difference.  Oh!  And, one thing that I didn't tell you!" Everyone groaned. "No, no. No worries, this is a good thing!" Chris assured them, "... For one of you. I don't know who, but Chef has given one of the mystery customers that's going to be walking around your booths the Hall Pass.  So, if you don't get invincibility by winning, there's always the Hall Pass!  I dunno who has it, it could be an old lady, a little boy with a teddy bear.... Heck, it could be my dad if he's out there!  Anyway, you six need to set up booths, kinda like lemonade stands... easy for Katherine..., and get to selling!  Go, investors, go!"

The camera switched scenes to see Chris in the sky, in a helicopter with Chef Hatchet, watching the competition. The camera went down to see a busy road of many people walking towards, from, and/or around it. Jeff, Katherine, and Stefani were on a sidewalk on one side of the street. Lilie, Nalyd, and Ryan were on the other side. All six were setting up their booths before they could sell anything. It seemed that Chris supplied them all with ample amounts of paint, woods, and nails, seeing as they all had these respective supplies on the ground in front of them. Katherine began working on nailing wood together, "Workin' at the lem-stand! Whoa-ohhh-ohh-ohhhh!  Workin' at the lem-stand, yeah!  OW!"  Jeff looked at her, passionately.

Jeff: (laughing out of happiness) I'm so glad I have her. She's so... awesome! (tries to sing the same thing) ''Workin' at the lem-stand! Whoa-oh- (bursts out laughing out of more happiness)'' Ahhhh....

As Katherine continued working, the camera went over to Lilie doing scenic nothing. She quickly snapped her fingers 7 times. 7 of the ten hired men appeared at her side. She, then, waved her hand to the unassembled wood, nails, and paint. "Hup! Hup! Hup! Hup! Hup! Hup!" the seven men chanted. They quickly ran over to the equipment and immediately began assembling Lilie's booth. In about 5 and a half seconds, the men were finished. They backed out of the way to show Lilie their work. Lilie looked to see her booth, painted and organized, with a sign on top that read:

Lilie's Super Fun Pop Gum! "The taste will explode in your mouth!"

Ryan: If there's a way for me to steal Lilie's dad, you better believe I'm going to find it. (groans) That's totally not fair!

Everyone looked in awe at Lilie's booth. Jeff, Katherine, and Stefani then crossed the street to get a closer look at it. "Nice, huh?" she wittingly said as the three were coming over. Trying to hide how great he thinks it is, Jeff let out, "... I've seen better." The camera went back over to Lilie, who had a smart look on her face.

Lilie: Why settle for one lovebird when you can have the other one?

Lilie, then, appeared behind Jeff and Katherine and put her arms on their shoulders, "You know... I have my dad's helpers for a little while longer. I could help you guys out if you want." "I'm in!" both of them said at once.

Jeff: Free help? Heh... Mama didn't raise a fool, man.

"GO!" Lilie said, as Jeff's confessional disappeared. At that point, Lilie's accompanied help went, half and half, to Jeff and Katherine's potential booths. Jeff and Katherine stared at them, as the camera only saw the shadows of Lilie's help working on Jeff and Katherine's booth. Within seconds, the workers finished both of them. Everyone looked at Katherine's booth first, dropping jaws in the process. With no slogan, it only read:

Katherine's Lemonade Stand

"Why no slogan?" Jeff asked her. Katherine smiled to herself hard, "Oh, you'll see." "Oh, she's such a kidder!" Lilie came back over to Katherine and Jeff, fake laughing, "Now that I've done something for you guys, could you guys do something for me?" Jeff and Katherine looked at each other, as the camera switched scenes to Ryan and Nalyd on the opposite side of the street. Stefani, who was supposed to be on Jeff and Katherine's side, was over on Ryan, Nalyd, and Liiie's side. "That's it! You got it!  Terry would want you to do this!" Ryan said, as the camera was only on him. It zoomed out to show Ryan yelling the commands at Stefani, who was building Ryan's booth. Ryan continued yelling commands at the love-struck Stefani. "Nails! Wood!  Paint!  Faster!" Ryan shouted. In joyful tears, Stefani threw in, "Terryyyy, I love you!!" "Yes, yes, he loves you, too!" Ryan said with a lying tone. Stefani finally finished the last touches of Ryan's booth, stopped working and read the sign she painted on top of it:

♥ Ryan's Love Nest ♥ "All you need is love!"

Ryan began pacing, looking at the booth in it's entirety. "Wha-- Wha-wha... What is this scrap!?" Ryan yelled. "It's myyyyyy heaaaaaaaaart!" Stefani said, with heart symbols in her eyes. Ryan rolled his eyes, "This is all wrong! Get it out of here!" "Well, okay!" Stefani told him, smiling. She, then, literally picked up the booth she just made for Ryan and hi-jacked it, by moving back to the other side of the street where her booth was going to go. While trying to cross the street, a car came blitzing towards Stefani. The car hit her, while she still had the booth in her hands. As she went flying upwards to the sky, everyone looked up. "Whoaaaaaaa," Jeff put his hand on his forehead to shade his eyes and continue looking at Stefani. The camera, then, panned back down to the ground to see the booth come down first, still in mint condition in Stefani's area, followed by Stefani, who fell right behind it. "Awesome sauce!!" Stefani yelled, throwing a 'thumbs-up' sign to the camera. Ryan scowled.

Ryan: You know... Now that I think about it, I don't need a pathetic booth to sell what I'm selling! This will still work out! These losers are still gonna lose it all!

The camera, then, showed Lilie's hired workers finishing with Jeff's booth from earlier. They were done with everything but the sign on top of the booth. One of the men leaned over to Jeff and secretly whispered, "'Ey... What do you want on the sign. Jeff, then, looked at the giant bag of food he stole from the boothowner earlier and began thinking.  He, then, finally told the worker something in his ear.  Lilie's hired help immediately grabbed a ladder out of nowhere and painted Jeff's request.  Jeff's sign now read:

Jeff's Phenomenal Catering Service '''[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oreo Milk's Favorite Sandwich! ]'''"

"Sweet!" Jeff shouted. Katherine, finished with her booth and ready to sell, walked over to Jeff's booth and looked up. "'Milk's Favorite Sandwich'?" she read. "Yep, yep! My sandwich goes great with that," Jeff replied to her. Katherine looked grossed out, then wiped that look off her face, "Good idea, baby!" The two of them, then, had a quick make-out session. It was interrupted by Nalyd putting the finishing touches on his booth. The camera panned across the street to see him. "Finished!" Nalyd annouced. The camera looked up and saw Nalyd's

Nalyd Renrut, Evil Inc. "Puggie! Or, we'll find you."

"Evil, Inc.?" Ryan looked at him, "Totally original." "Thanks!" Nalyd shouted to him. "It's sarcasm, learn it," Ryan scolded. Nalyd paid no mind to that and continued setting up shop. Chris threw a rope ladder down from the helicopter he's been in this whole time and climbed down it. "I can see your booths from up there!" Chris pointed to the sky, "I would say they're good... but, I'd be lying. Anyway... Are you guys ready?  I'm about to start opening your shops!" "I aaaaaaaaaaaaam!" Stefani shouted, with a revised sign on the booth she had that now read:

♥ Stefani's Ryan's Love Nest ♥ "All you need is love!"

"Okay! For those future millionaires that have forgotten, the objective today is to sell your items and the person that makes the most money wins!  Like I said earlier, there's a mystery customer out there that may slip you the Hall Pass!  That's also there and a second way to get invincibility!  Before we start, I need your items and how much you're charging for each one.  Remember:  American money!  Jeff!" "Sandwiches at $1.50!" he shouted. Chris recorded that information. "Katherine!" Katherine coughed and said, "Lemonade for 3 bucks!" "Lilie!" "Gum! And... the price is $1." "Nalyd!" "Puggies! A-- Chris interrupted Nalyd, "What the crap is a Puggie?" Nalyd grunted, "It's a modified Snuggie! Dang!" "Whatever... How much are you selling for it?" "Uhh... 90 dollars and--" Chris stopped Nalyd again. "$90?!" "Can you ever zip your useless face?" Nalyd told Chris, "Yes, $90... and... 99 cents."

Katherine: Who's gonna pay $90.99 for a broke-down piece of cotton?!

Chris made a lip-smacking noise and said under his breath, recording Nalyd's information, "Good luck with winning. Ryan!" Ryan weaseled his way out of telling the schoolmates what he was selling again, "Ugh. Chris, we already told you what we're selling.  All you need to know is my stuff is $6.66 a piece!" "Stefa-- Nevermind.  I'll just make something up.  No way am I asking Love-Struck.  Uhhh.... $18.88 will do." Chris took out a stopwatch. "You guys have 1 hour to sell, sell, sell! Most money wins!  GO!" Chris ran over and got back on the helicopter's rope and swung his way out of the area.

Right then, swarms upon swarms of people began crowding Jeff, Katherine, Lilie, Nalyd, and Stefani. The camera went over to a gentleman over at Jeff's Booth. "What'cha sellin'?" he asked, in a comfortable tone. "Supreme sandwiches!" "Nice name, I'll take... 4." "You don't even know what's on them. "Oh.. Well, okay then, what's on them?" "Hmm... Every cheese known to man, pickles, mayo, lettuce, tomatoes, ice cream, chips, co--" "Whoa, whoa, whoa! Did you just say there's ice cream on a sandwich!?" The gentleman looked at Jeff weirdly.  The camera slid back to Jeff, who was smiling. "You know it, bro!" he told him. The gentleman began walking away, "Not interested." "... Idiot," Jeff mumbled under his breath.

A male and female pair then went over to Nalyd's booth. "Nalyd Renrut. Evil, Inc.?" the male said. The female began rubbing up on the male. "Evil, eh?" she said seductively, "This could be what we need to... you know... eh, eh?" The female began nudging the male. An annoyed Nalyd finally said, "You two gonna buy something or do the toot?!" "UGH! Well, I never!" the female said. She, then, slapped Nalyd and left with the man. After that, 4 males came to Nalyd's booth. They all went down the line asking if Nalyd sold something. "You sell top hats?" the first guy asked, almost falling. "Uhhh.... No?" "Flowers?" the second one said. "Not... really." "You got some hur' (hair)!?" the third guy asked Nalyd, looking a bit out-of-it. "What the heck is wrong with you!?" "... You got some rubber... bands?" the fourth one wondered. Nalyd rolled his eyes, but then looked up and began thinking, "Uh..... Suuuuuuuuuuuure." The fourth guy, then, slapped the third one, which created a domino effect, causing the other three guys to fall down, "Du-- Du-du-- Dude! They got rub-rubs!" Nalyd showed them his Puggies, "Yeahhh, these are like.... super rub-rubs!" "Ahhhhhh! How much!?" they all asked at once. "9-- You know.... Let me just see your wallets." Nalyd stopped himself in time. All four stupid men handed Nalyd their wallets. Nalyd rummaged through all four of them and hi-jacked all the money in each wallet. "There you are! Enjoy your P-- super rub-rubs!" Nalyd announced, giving them only one Puggie and each of them all of their wallets back. The four men smiled and walked off. One of them fell, while walking. "Duuuuuuuuude, this thing was soooooooooo cheap!" one of the guys said to the other.

The camera then went over to Stefani, already in mid-conversation with a loud-mouthed girl. "Terry's mine!" she shouted. "Mine!" the loud-mouthed girl yelled at her. "Mine!" "Mine!!!" Stefani, then, slapped her customer, right before the customer retaliated back. The two of them got into a slap fight. "Terry. Is. MINE!" Stefani shouted at her. She then jumped from behind the booth and began rolling on the ground, fighting her customer. "GURLfriend! He's mine!  And, there ain't n'un you can do 'bout that!" Stefani's customer shouted. They rolled all the way over to Katherine's booth and kept going to other places, though the camera stopped at Katherine.

Katherine was finishing making her pitchers of lemonade when she had a flashback.

(flashback begin) ''"OW!!!........................ Cool!" she yelled out randomly, "The pain's engorging!"'' Katherine raised her shoe to dig the thumbtack out of it, put her hand on her chin and began thinking, "Hmm.... A spike in the road." (flashback end)

"Hmm..." Katherine mumbled. She looked to both her right and left to make sure nothing was near her. She turned around with the lemonade pitchers, placed them on the ground, took out a mysterious substance from her pocket, and added a portion of the substance to each pitcher of lemonade she had. She laughed.

Katherine: Hey... Spiked lemonade is always fun. This is gonna be interesting. (chuckles)

Two little boys, that looked like under the age of 10 came to Katherine's stand. "Hey, there, kiddies!" She poured two glasses of lemonade, "Want something to drink!?" The two kids shyly shook their heads and gave Katherine $1 each. Katherine gave each boy their glass of lemonade, and the two boys quickly drank it. Both boys' pair of eyes widened and they looked at each other. They flinched and jumped back. "Ohhhhh, you were soooo close to me," the first boy said to the second. "I-I-I-I was?" the second boy uttered. "Yea-Yeah..." the first boy hiccuped. He, then, fingered through the second boy's hair. "You-yo-you know... I never noticed ho-how freakin' hot you are!" the first boy whispered to the other. The second boy, then, touched the first one's chest and giggled. Katherine looked at the two and shooed them away after that action. "Keep it G-Rated, people!"

"Get your super fun pop gum! Get your super fun pop gum over hereeeeeee!!" Lilie yelled at potential customers. Lilie's hired help from earlier was still around, near Lilie's booth. The, men, then split up and randomly scooped up some people and brought them all to Lilie's booth. "Buy some gum!" they all said evilly to the customers they scooped up. "I'll take one!" "I'll take two!" "Gimme a whole pack!" were some of the replies the scared customers gave to Lilie. Lilie scooped up the money and began distributing the gum.

"$252!!!" Nalyd said, after counting the money he stole from the four guys that were at his booth earlier. "I got $80 from all those people! I'll catch you!" Lilie yelled to Nalyd, who was next to her. "Psht. Good luck!" Nalyd responded, in somewhat friendly competition.

"Do you want one or not?" the camera went back to Jeff, who had an elderly man in front of him, deciding on if he wanted a sandwich or not. "I have diabetes... I don't know if I can eat some of that stuff." he told Jeff. Jeff thought on his feet, "Of course you can! Didn't you hear!?  Everyone that has diabetes.... uhh.... doesn't have it anymore!" "What?! That's swell!  Gimme 75!  I'mma celebrate with a party!" the old man said, getting his wallet out. Jeff thought on his feet, yet again and took the man's wallet, "Ohhhh, dude, I don't want you to strain your eyes. I'll get the money for you!" The old man smiled, "Well, aren't you just a good whipper-snapper!?" He began laughing... which turned into wheezing. Since Jeff was giving 75 sandwiches with many things on it, Jeff was only supposed to take $112.50; however, Jeff took $200.

Jeff: Just a... friendly tip, perhaps? Heh, heh.

He handed the wallet back to the old man, and began making all the sandwiches. The old man looked at him. "Oh, my," the man said, watching Jeff prepare the tall sandwiches. "Yeah, it's long and big alright!" "Wait... What are you talking about?!" the old man snapped at him. Jeff finished the sandwiches and told him, "Myyyy sandwiches?" "Oh, well okay, then," the old man jacked the 75 sandwiches, "Thanks a lot, sonny!"

Jeff: Do I feel bad? Eh, a little bit. Do I want to win? You. Bet. Let's do this, dudes!

Due to Ryan not doing anything and Stefani still fighting with a customer, Jeff, Katherine, Lilie, and Nalyd began speaking at once. "Get your super fun pop gum! The taste will explode in your mouth!" "Sandwiches! Sandwiches over here!  Sandwiches for a buck fifty!" "Puggies! Buy a Puggie!  Get over here now!!" "Yo! Buy some lemonade.... OR I'LL MAKE YOU HAVE TO WEAR A HEARIN' AID!" Lilie and Nalyd's screaming attracted the most people.

The camera went over to Nalyd's booth. Nalyd had a man named Jerry and his wife, Jessica, at his booth. Nalyd donned a car salesman's voice and tone, "Hello, hello, and hel-lo! Welcome to 'Nalyd Renrut. Evil, Incorporated'!  What can I do to make sure you leave with Puggies today?!" Jerry looked weirdly at Nalyd, "Puggies?" "YES! Puggies!  .... Or we'll find you." Nalyd nefariously mumbled. "What!?" "Nothing," he smiled, "anyway... Maybe you're the type that likes bargain deals! Eh?  Eh?  Bargains?  Tell you what... if you buy a Puggie for the low, low, low price of $90.99, I'll wash your cat!  Yes, yes, I'll wash your freakin' disgusting house cat!" Jessica immediately broke down into tears. "Our cat's at the vet right now," Jerry said under his breath. Nalyd immediately fake gasped.

Nalyd: Like I care. I want the money!! (looks crazily into the camera)

"Well, let's skip that for now!" Nalyd yelled, "Buy your Puggie and you get.... a brick! Absolutely free!  No charge, no shipping and handling!  A genuine brick for all your.... 'brick-y' purposes!!" Jessica stopped crying, and looked up, "I don'--" Nalyd immediately jumped into Jessica's face and pointed within centimeters of her nose. "YOU, ma'am, can be the proud owner of a less-disgusting cat and a freakin' brick!" Nalyd shouted in her face, "All this for $90.99. BUT, WAIT, there's more!!" Jerry almost began to leave the booth, but stopped when Nalyd said there was more. "That's right! I'm giving you some more of it! Buy your Puggie, and you get... a cat-wash... a cool brick... and... I'll even give you laxatives!" Jerry immediately threw up on the ground. "Yeeeees, make those crappy nights in the bathroom a little bit better!" Jessica looked in sad awe at Nalyd, "You know what... I don't have any money." Nalyd's face froze. He then eyed Jessica and plainly said, "Get the (bleep) away from me." Jessica scoffed, picked up Jerry, who was sitting on the ground after barfing, and left with dignity.

The camera, then, went over to Lilie's booth. A strange man, wearing all black, approached Lilie's stand. Lilie's hired help, still surrounding the stand, looked suspiciously at this man. "Gimme what you got," the mysterious man beyond faintly whispered. "What!?" Lilie responded. The man raised his voice, "Gimme what you got..." "I can't understand you!" The man finally began speaking in his regular tone, "Gimme what ya' got!!" One of Lilie's man gasped. He, then, immediately walked towards the man, which caused the man to run away. "We got a runner!!" one of Lilie's workers said, running after him, "Men! After him!  He's on the FBI's Most Wanted List!" "How do you know?" another man asked from behind. "Trust me!" All the men left Lilie and ran after the mysterious one.

Lilie: (scoffing, thinking about herself) Why do I have to get the weird people!? Ugh...

A small montage began to start, including Lilie exchanging her gum for money to others, Katherine giving lemonade to some, Nalyd selling his Puggies, and Stefani, after fighting over Terry, selling some of her chocolate love doves. Everyone but Ryan continued to rack up money. Ryan had been observing the entire competition this entire time.

Ryan: Some people are so dumb, it's almost cute. Not a hint of strategy seen in any of this.

The schoolmates were beginning to approach the end of their selling. There were only a few hours left to sell their merchandise, and the scores racked up as so:

The camera flashed to Stefani, who was selling more of her doves, then went intensely over to Jeff. He was frantically counting his money and feared he was losing.

Jeff: (shows wad of money to the camera) Look! Guys, this is all I have. $1.50 isn't cutting it. I don't see how Lilie's doing so well and her crap's only a dollar! Hmm... I need to take a few drastic measures.

Jeff whistled over to Katherine, to get her attention. Katherine walked over to Jeff, leaving her booth unattended. At that point, an entire football team randomly approached Nalyd's booth, blocking his view to anything. Nalyd immediately picked up his Puggies. "Well, Puggies, looks like we gotta get ourselves out of another jam," Nalyd told them, looking at the football players. Still thinking of when to make his move, Ryan eyed Katherine's booth and saw that she left her money scattered across it. Ryan put his hand on his chin.

Ryan: Like I said, Grade. A. Stupidity.

Ryan crossed the street and went over to Katherine's booth, swiped all the money but $1 and hustled over to his booth. Since he was talking to Katherine, Jeff did not see this. Katherine had her back turned towards her booth, unable to see it. Nalyd's view was blocked and Stefani didn't care. Only Lilie saw what Ryan had just did. Lilie looked at the evil in Ryan's eyes and stayed quiet.

Lilie: Being in his alliance bites! Right now, I'm glad I'm getting on Jeff and Katherine's good side.... Well, at least Katherine's... I still need to work on Jeff some more.

Ryan was busily counting his new money when Jeff finally finished talking to Katherine. She stayed there at his booth. "Oh! Here comes someone!  You ready?" Jeff asked her. "Ready as I'll ever be!" A middle-aged man approached Jeff's stand. "Well, hello there!" he said to the both of them. "Hi!" both Jeff and Katherine responded. Katherine, then, went off-screen. The man smiled, "Are ya sellin' something, man?" "Shyeah! Surpreme sandwiches!  The sandwich with everything on it!" Jeff told him. "Uhhh... everything?" the man questioned. "Yeah... mustard, ketchup, pickles, onions, cheese, lettuce, mashed potatoes, chicken, waffles, ice cream, fudge, gravy, pi--" Jeff stopped, because the man began looking a bit sickly. "Look... sonny. That doesn't sound too--"  Right then, a giant blow was landed and the man Jeff was just talking to went down like a tree. Behind the man was Katherine with the same bat that had Lilie and Dedrek's name on it from the computer challenge. Katherine began jumping for joy, "It worked! It worked!" She then went to the man's back pocket and found his wallet. "Oh... Snap," Katherine mumbled looking in it. Right after, she fainted. Still holding the wallet, now upside-down because of her fainting, multiple bills fell on her face. Jeff gasped. "Katherine!" he walked over to her, "Are-are you okay?!" He gathered up all the money off her face to see she had regained conscience while on the ground. Jeff counted it, "This is $1,000 in cash!!" "Who carries around all that money?!" Katherine wondered. "Who cares, babe!? It's ours now!!" Jeff laughed. He divided the money, "5 for me and 5 for you!" "Eeeeeeeee!!" Katherine grabbed her share and ran back over to her booth. She quickly noticed her money was gone. Katherine gasped, "Hey! Where's my shiz?!" After the many changes in money distribution, another score update invoked:

Chris shouted from his helicopter with a megaphone, "Time's winding down! Sell, sell, sell!  Plus, the Hall Pass is still out there!  Repeating:  the Hall Pass is still out there!" "Hate 'im, hate 'im, hate 'im!" Ryan sang to himself.

Jeff: I just finished counting my money. I have, like, over $1,100. I'm seeing invincibility in my future! Katherine: Thanks to some dirty, rotten thief in this game, I only have $500! You would think that's enough to win, but.... (confessional cut off) 'Lilie: (sighs) My dad's workers are still off catching some goon for the FBI. I needed them for stupid intimidation! Ugh... (to the viewer) You think $800 is enough to win? Nalyd: Tick-tock-tick-tock. You hear that? It's the sounds heard right before I win this thing! Ryan's totally going down. Winner or bust, baby! And, with about $1,000, I don't see how I can't lose this challenge! Ryan: (counting money) $327, $328, $329.... $330. Not enough. Ugh! Katherine's such an idiot, why did I have to choose her stand to rob. I bet everyone's got more money than this crap. Stefani: (spinning around in the confessional chair) Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

The camera went back over to Katherine looking everywhere around her booth for her old money. Lilie saw how frantic she was moving and went over to her. "Hey," Lilie started. "Hi." "Okay, let's cut the small talk," Lilie said, without thinking, "I know who stole your money." Katherine gasped, "You do?! WHO!?" "I can't say," Lilie reeled Katherine in, "unless..." "'Unless'?! Unless what?" Lilie went a bit closer to Katherine and whispered something in her ear. Ryan was watching all of this. Lilie stepped back a couple feet back where she was, and extended her hand. Katherine eagerly accepted and shook hands with Lilie. Lilie, then went back across the street back to her own booth. Obviously, Ryan went over to her. "What was that?" he asked her. "What was what?" "Don't play dumb... Like you have a choice too, anyway. I mean, what did you just do with Katherine?" "Made a deal." "What kind of deal?" Lilie sighed and lied to Ryan, "I temporarily got her in our alliance to vote out Stefani, so she can stop being so replusive and go frolic with Terry. "Ugh! I'm so in! I'm still wiping my mouth from what.... eugh... happened earlier." Ryan told her. "I know, yuck!"

Ryan: That Lilie... Perhaps she isn't just deadweight. Lilie: False senses of security are a woman's best weapon! I am Lilie, I am woman! Hear. Me. Roar! (roars)

The camera went over to Nalyd, who was selling his last Puggie to the last of the football players. "There you are, my good man," Nalyd said to him. "I'll get to using this right away!" the last football player said. And, with that, the entire team left Nalyd's booth.

"Time to kick it up a notch!" Ryan whispered to himself. He, then, pulled a megaphone out of his pants and yelled into it as if he were a newspaper salesman, "Want information on Total Drama 101?! Want to know what dirty secrets the finalists of this stupid game!?  Then, check out the hidden transcripts of Jeff, Katherine, Nalyd, and Stefani!  All here at Ryan's Booklet of Stupid Quotes!  Yes, that's right!  Come see how smart Ryan is compared to these other freaks!!  $6.66 a transcript!  Come one, come all!" The camera began panning around to see Jeff with his jaw dropped, Katherine looking a bit steamed, Nalyd with fire in his eyes, and Stefani... not caring. Ryan continued through the megaphone, "Read all about Jeff's fungus feet!" "What!?" Jeff shouted. "... or Nalyd's affair with a tree stump!" "Que!?" Nalyd yelled to Ryan. "... or Stefani secretly being a robot!" The camera went to Stefani, who stood there. A few seconds later, she began moving like a robot, "Beep-beep-beep-boop-boop-beep!" "... or even Katherine's.... Well, I don't have anything over Katherine. But, come read about Jeff, Nalyd, and Stefani!" Ryan finished.

Right when Ryan said that, a sea of people approached where Ryan stood, waving money in his face, wanting one of his transcripts. Ryan put his megaphone up and collected money from everyone. "Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you," Ryan chanted with every person he took money from. He, then, literally threw out all of his transcripts to the dozens upon dozens of people crowding him, and watched them attack each other for the papers.

Some of the people that grabbed one of transcripts began reading some of the scenes out loud:

(fake transcript scene start) Katherine: (on Jeff's bed with Jeff) I love you. Jeff: (not wearing any shoes, only socks) I love you, too, Katherine. (they kiss; Katherine notices huge bulges on Jeff's feet) Katherine: Sweetie, what are those? Jeff: (looks down, tries to think of something) Uhh... My feet? Katherine: No, no, (takes Jeff's socks off) what are-- Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!! Jeff: Calm down, babe! Katherine: Ewwwwww, it's throbbing!! What is that junk!? Jeff: It's foot fungus! C'mon, everybody gets it, dude! Katherine: (shaking on the other side of the bed) Yeah, but it doesn't make it look like your feet have been turned inside out! (fake transcript scene end)

Jeff listened to many of Ryan's readers read Ryan's libel and growled. He ran over to Ryan, "Liar! I don't have foot fungus!" Ryan pointed to Jeff's booth, "Tell that to your little sandwich lovers over there getting their own refunds." Jeff looked to his booth. "Noooooooooo!" he ran back over and confiscated what was left of his money. While he was doing that, another of Ryan's readers read another one of the stories aloud:

(fake transcript scene start) Stefani: Hmm... (holds up a CD) This will do fine. (puts CD in her CD Player; techno music comes on) Oooooh, that's my jam!! (begins doing The Robot) Beep. Beep-beep. Be-be-beep. Booooooooop. Beep. Beep-beep. Be-be-beep. Booooooooop. (fake transcript scene end)

The camera went over to Stefani. "I'mma robot! Boop-boop!" Stefani said, encouraging Ryan's fake transcript. Everyone began backing away from Stefani. The screen, then, panned to Nalyd, who was looking a bit angry. A third person read Nalyd's part of Ryan's transcript aloud:

(fake transcript scene start) Nalyd: I can't fight this feeling anymore. You're just so darn beautiful! I've never felt this way before. Oh, gosh. It's getting hard for me to comprehend and even fathom your sexiness. Oh... I'll just say it. Screw Tammi! I love you, tree stump! I love everything about you! You're the hottest thing I've ever seen! (fake transcript scene end)

Nalyd listened to the bystander read the lies aloud. "Libeler!" Nalyd shouted to Ryan, next to him. "Oh, whatever. Call me what you want...," Ryan said. He fingered through the bills he got and took out the coveted Hall Pass, "but who's going to win the game!?" "No!! You have it?!" Nalyd over-exaggerated. "No, Nalyd, I just showed you a piece of blue paper that has 'Hall Pass' on it, but it doesn't do anything," Ryan sarcastically mumbled.

Nalyd: He can have it if he wants it. I think he believes my plans were to vote him out. As if... I have another idea for the next step of my plan.

Right at that point, Chris blew an airhorn from the helicopter he was in. He threw the rope ladder down again and slid down it to the schoolmates. "Time's up, my money makers! Let's see your results!" Chris announced.

"Nalyd grabs the win! And everyone else is heading to the elimination room in Detention!" Chris announced, "Who's got the Hall Pass?" Ryan coughed on purpose, stepped out, and held it up in front of Chris, "I do!" "And, that does it! Nalyd and Ryan are invincible!  Everyone else is fair game!  Go cast your votes!"

Katherine: He's not wasting any time to get rid of us.

Before the Detention Hall Ceremony, everyone was walking towards Gilded Glory to vote. "Jeff, can I speak with you?" both Lilie and Nalyd said at the same time. Jeff looked at both of them, "Uhhh..." Lilie smiled, "Nalyd, you can speak with him first!" "Say, thanks!" Nalyd responded to Lilie, with a taste of disgust in his voice. Jeff went over to Nalyd and continued walking. "I just realized that I never told you my plan. You still wanna know?" Nalyd questioned Jeff.

Jeff: To be honest, I've nearly forgotten about that, man.

"Uhh, sure!" Jeff happily said. Nalyd began telling Jeff his plan as they walked off-screen. The camera, then, went to Lilie, who tried catching up to Katherine. "Ohhhhhh, Katherine!" Lilie happily said. "Yeeeeeeees?" she turned around. The two of them began talking, and, ultimately walked off-screen, leaving Ryan with Stefani. Ryan was behind Stefani, and eyed the back of her head, thinking about what she made him and Lilie do earlier.

Ryan: Psh! 'Luh-innnnnnnnnnnn'. UGH! She's such a weirdo, I wish I could give her a beat-innnnnnnnnn. (groans)

The camera, then, switched scenes to everyone in Detention Hall, locking in their votes, using the hand-held devices this time. "Votes are in!" Chris announced at the front of the room. He grabbed a card that was dangling in the air with the voting results and the tray of 5 Golden A+'s. "Let's see.... We have a Golden A+ for Katherine!" Chris threw the object at Katherine, as she caught it. "And, of course, Nalyd and Ryan. Mr. and Mr. Invincibility!" Chris threw the Golden A+'s respectively. Chris looked at the last three schoolmates, "Well, well, well... Jeff, Lilie, and Stefani. There are only two Golden A+'s left on this tray.  And.... one of them will be going to........... JEFF!" Chris threw Jeff his Golden A+. Jeff wiped the sweat off his brow, and let out a sigh of relief. "Let's look at the stats here. Lilie.  Reasons why you could be going home:  You cheated your way through the entire challenge today.  You may have lost trust in Ryan, your only alliance member, with all this secret talk you've been doing with everyone.  And.. Quite frankly, you suck!" "Hey!" Lilie scolded Chris. "And, then there's Stefani!" Chris continued, "You.... uhh.... You got Lilie and Ryan to kiss each other. You've been completely crazy this entire episode.  And, now... we're beginning to think you're part-robot." "Boop!" Stefani let out. "Your choice was obvious, needless to say," Chris told everyone, "The final Golden A+ goes to.......................... STEFANI!" Chris threw the Golden A+ to Stefani. "Ohhhhhhhhh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!" Lilie yelled out, "How could you vote me out... again?!" Lilie stood up in anger. "I'm glad you asked that, Lilie, because... whether you did or you didn't, I was going to reveal the votes out loud this episode!" Chris announced. Everyone immediately gasped.

"Of course, Ryan voted for Stefani. Stefani voted for... Jeff, it looks like.  Due to Nalyd, Jeff voted for Lilie, as did himself!  Katherine went behind Lilie's back and voted for Lilie!  And, finally... Lilie wasted her vote and voted for Ryan!" "What?!" Lilie and Ryan said together. "How could you vote for me?!" Lilie grabbed Katherine. Right then, Ryan grabbed Lilie. "Worry about her later! How could you vo--" Chris got impatient, "Ohhh, time's up! Lilie!  Time to walk the Walk of Shame!  NOW!" Lilie began walking towards the door mumbling along the way. "I will have my revenge. Lilie doesn't go down that easy!" Lilie walked out the door and out of Gilded Glory, with Chris following her. "And with that, we are at the Final Five! All of the remaining five contestants will be on the jury for the Finale!  Will Ryan forgive Lilie in the future?  Will Katherine be forgiven by Lilie?!  Will Jeff ever stopping abusing the word 'dude'?!  Tune in to figure out the answers to all those questions, as well as who turns the Final Five into the Final Four on the next episode of Total... Drama... 1-0-1!!" Chris signed off the show, as the camera faded to black.

Chapter Twenty Two: Livin' on a Sprayer!
"Last time on Total Drama 101!" Chris began his usual recap in front of Gilded Glory High School, "An ode to the dollar sign: big, everyone recognizes it, and everyone wants it--much like me! Our remaining six schoolmates competed in one of my favorite challenge subjects so far, Economics! Lilie thought she had this challenge in the bag because of her snooty, badly-dressed-in-black assistants that she hired.  Too bad it blew up in her face!  I was more than convinced that Jeff may have lost what was left of his mind when he started selling those sandwiches!  Every food you can think of was topped on his, uhhh, creation.  But, hey, they sold and that's what matters... it made me look good, anyway.  Ryan was shown to print lies about everyone in order to sell them in transcripts to obsessed TD101 fans--once again, another work of genius.  He, however, did not win.  It was the challenge that finally got Nalyd an actual win since the Computer challenge with those ridiculous blanket things." Nalyd's voice was heard off-screen, "They're called Puggies!! PUGGIE! Or, we'll find you!" "Riiiiight, anyway. During the vote-off, Nalyd revealed to have a 2-part plan in order to pick off what was left of Ryan's Alliance and it looks like part 1 succeeded. Lilie was kicked to the curb. Sayonara to Mrs. Bizz yet again. This time, the Final Five will be competing to win my heart--with Art!  Heh. 'Heart', 'art'.  Who will survive!?  It's gonna be a close one right here on Total Drama 1-0-1!"

After the theme song ended, the camera switched scenes to show Nalyd, Jeff, Stefani, and Katherine in Nalyd and Ryan's Master Bedroom. Ryan was in the shower, as the water was heard running. Jeff, Katherine, and Stefani were sitting on Nalyd and Ryan's bed. "You sure this is safe?" Jeff asked Nalyd, who was pacing in front of the other three. Nalyd peered at Jeff, "Why wouldn't it be? What's he gonna do?" Jeff nodded and Nalyd continued pacing, "Alright, now I've called you all in here because we all have a common enemy, right?" "Right!" Jeff and Stefani both said. "Huh?" Katherine looked confused. "Just say 'right'," Katherine heard whispers from Jeff. "OH! Uhh, right!" Katherine affirmed. "And, we all think we should do something about this problem, right?!" "Right!!" "Good! Now that we're all on the same page, I need to let you all know that I have a plan to get rid of our... problem.  In fact, it's already in motion," Nalyd smirked. Stefani, Jeff, and Katherine exchanged looks. Stefani raised her hand. "Stef, we're not in class, just say it. Free speech!!" Katherine yelled. Stefani didn't even realize her hand went up. She looked at it and gasped, "Oh, sorry. Uhh, what did you have in mind?" Nalyd looked at her and smiled.

Nalyd: I know what you're thinking. (high, squeaky voice) "What's Nalyd talking about? He doesn't have a plan! He's too good for that. Why is Stefani so worried? Why does Nalyd look so hot in that hoodie? (normal voice) Well, thank you for thinking I look hot in this thing. (winks) You know, not many can pull it off and-- (realizes he got off-track) I'll explain all of that later. All will be answered in due time.

"Well, I can't just say it! He's in here!" Nalyd pointed at the bathroom door. Katherine looked at the door and interrupted Nalyd. "Hey, you know what would be fun?" she looked at Nalyd and then at Jeff. Jeff raised an eyebrow and then began thinking. Nalyd raised his voice a bit, "Can it wait just a little longer?" "Okay, okay. Sorry, Mr. President." "Now, as I was-- HEY!" Nalyd caught on to the ongoing Richard Nixon joke Katherine just revived. The three of them began laughing.

Stefani: I wonder if the real Richard Nixon has any relatives that's still alive. I'd love for one of them to come up here so I can do some mad comparing.

Nalyd's eyes scanned the three on his bed, "As I was saying, I know the rest of my plan will work, but I need all of you to help me." "Why should we help you, broham?" Jeff questioned. "Didn't I already explain that, "broham"? If you help, we can say goodbye to a little nuisance that's been nagging all of us this whole season!" Katherine's head went up a bit, "I don't see what the big deal is. Ryan hasn't done anything to me." "Do you think of anyone else but yourself!?" "'Course! I think of me. I, uhh, I think of Jeff a lot," she paused and gave Jeff a small hug. "Oh! And, I think about my bed! I treat him as a person! He's comfortable and I never want to leave him: all the essentials you need to be a human! Come to think of it..." Katherine got up and ran to her room without saying anything. Nalyd stammered, "Wait, no! I still need you! Wa-- Ugh." He was left with Stefani and Jeff, "Can't one of you go get her?" "Chill, dude. I'm sure she'll be back," Jeff said, with Stefani nodding her head.

Nalyd: Chill? I can't really "chill" right now. I'm trying to win a game and nobody's cooperating.

"Fine," Nalyd fake-smiled, "I'll chill." He sat on his bed between Jeff and Stefani. "I'll tell you both about the plan at some point. I'm confident that it'll work." "Well, if you're so confident, I guess I can help," Jeff let out and extended his hand to Nalyd. Nalyd tried to shake it but Jeff immediately pulled it away and stroked the back of his hair, "But on one condition!" "Oh, boy," Stefani rolled her eyes while Nalyd groaned. "What condition?" Jeff closed his eyes and smiled, "You seem to be really positive that this plan or whatever is going to work, dude. How about a little wager?" "A... what?" "You know, a wager. A side-bet, but only if you're seriously confident, Mr. Nalyd, dude, sir." "Wha-what do you have in mind?"

Jeff whispered in both Nalyd and Stefani's ears. As he was doing this, the water stopped running in the bathroom and Ryan had stepped out of the shower. Jeff finished his betting conditions and they caused Stefani to let out roar-like laughter. "Shhhhhh!!" Nalyd reacted. "Nalyd?" Ryan called out behind a closed bathroom door, "Who is that?" "What's it to you?" "Well, it's my room. I think I have a right to know." "Fine, it was me," he assured Ryan.

Ryan: At that point, I couldn't decide whether to believe him or not. I mean, I didn't give a care, but I really couldn't figure it out. He was probably lying and he knows I hate it when people are in the room when I'm... vulnerable. Then again, he could have been telling the truth because that girly laughter does suit him.

"Nalyd! You know I don't like people in the room when I'm in the shower! Can't you respect someone in your lifetime?!" Ryan's shouts echoed from behind the closed door into the room. "When have you ever respected me?" "Well, I let you back in this room when I could have told someone you were a monster!" As Nalyd and Ryan went back and forth, Jeff and Stefani's laughter over the whole matter grew larger. "I hear laughter! Get them out of here!" Ryan yelled. "No! You're not my dad!"

Jeff: Dude, they still sound like an old, married couple! (laughs more) Stefani: I thought... wow.

At that point, a furious Ryan came out with nothing but a towel on and sandals, which caused Jeff and Stefani to laugh even more. "Hey, nerds! This isn't your room, get out!" Ryan proclaimed. It was to no avail, however. Stefani and Jeff's laughter overpowered Ryan's bickering. "Nalyd! Get them out of here! I have to change and get--" Ryan was cut off by a P.A. system.

"All dead-weights, please report to Room 131 for your Fine Arts lesson! Time for you to show me some masterpieces!  NOW!" Chris brought upon them. "What!? No! I still need to get ready! This is all your fault!" Ryan pointed a sharp finger at Nalyd. Nalyd held his hand up, "Ryan, here is my bag of care. You see that it's empty." Ryan grumbled, "Jeff! Weirdo! Get out! I need privacy! It's already bad enough that he gets to stay in here." "Why can't you just go in the closet?" Jeff asked, scratching his head. "Because, dude, I shouldn't have to do that in my own room if I don't have to. Plus, you have no right to be in here!" At that point, Katherine was walking back up into the Master Bedroom to fetch Jeff for the challenge. She was talking to herself, "Man, I need hang out with Bed more oft--" She stopped in her tracks when she saw Ryan in a towel. Her eyes glowed, "Oh, perfect!!" She ran up to Ryan and snatched the towel off of his person, "FREE THE BEAST!!" Katherine ran towards Gilded Glory with the towel tied around her neck like a cape. Ryan, naked, screamed and grabbed Nalyd's pillow to immediately cover his shame. "Hey, that's mine!" Nalyd protested. Ryan grunted, "Hey, this room is mine, but, like this pillow I'm clutching, it's being invaded by something unwanted. Now, get out, so I can change!" "Yes, Your Highness." Nalyd, Stefani, and Jeff, then vacated the room with Katherine.

Ryan: I have had it with him!

The camera switched scenes to show Ryan walking in to join the other remaining schoolmates and Chris in the Art room. "Hey, there, Junior Picassos!" Chris started, "Welcome to the Final Five." Jeff and Katherine clapped awkwardly. "Thank you, thank you," Nalyd bowed to the couples' clapping. Ryan looked at him, "The welcome wasn't just for you, nerdling." "You know, Ryan, I could--" Nalyd was cut off by Chris. "Hey! You know there is no stealing of the Chris McLean air time. I was talking," Chris replied, mocking Nalyd. "Anyway, today's challenge is, well, over Fine Arts. You all do know what Fine Arts are, right?" Jeff and Nalyd looked at each other, Stefani scratched her head, and Katherine began looking up. Ryan glanced at them all, "You can't be serious." "Uhh, I saw a picture of this babe in a bikini. She was some fiiiiiine art," Jeff spoke out, causing Chris and Ryan to smack their foreheads. "I expected nothing less," Chris began. "Fine Arts, guys! You know, Picasso, Michelangelo, Da Vinci... even me!" Chris, then, held up a poorly-made self portrait of himself, made with spray paint. After seeing it, the schoolmates laughed. Chris's pride was struck, "Oh, like you could do better! And, that's exactly what we'll be testing today!" Chris walked a few yards over to a huge sheet covering a massive area of the Fine Arts room. He yanked it off in order to reveal five, huge, differently colored giant spray canisters and came running back to the teens.

"Those things are gigantic!" Stefani shouted. "Unlike your brain, Captain Claude. Today's challenge is another two-parter! As you can hopefully see, back there, are are five huge cans of spray paint behind me, each with a different tint.  One is red, another is blue, that one's green, there's a pink one, and another is purple.  Your first task is to use whatever physical skills you to get to the top where the big nozzle is located!" Everyone gasped and looked towards the top of the spray cans.

Jeff: (laughing) Physical skills? Man, this bet is looking better and better.

"The first upcoming artist to reach his, her, or its nozzle first will win the final coveted Hall Pass of the season! Yes, I said final.  When you all reach the top--hopefully it's soon--I'll tell you what to do from there!  The challenge starts.......... 5 minutes ago!  GO, GO, GO!" Chris ran off-screen. "Wait!" Katherine shouted, "How do we climb this thing!?" "That's not my problem!" Chris's voice trailed off in the distance.

Ryan: So, not only did he say we had to climb stupid paint cans, he also left us there with no way on how to do it! (groans) I'm over this game.

"So, now what?" Katherine looked at Jeff. Jeff shrugged and began walking over to the blue canister.

Katherine: Well, that sure helped... Nalyd: I could see through Chris's sketchiness through this challenge. There was definitely something hidden in the room that could help us climb those huge paint-thingies. I'm onto you, McLean!

Nalyd paced the room, "There's gotta be something in here that--" He stopped in his tracks when he saw desks scattered around the room. "Hmmmm..." Stefani saw Nalyd thinking and walked past him, wondering what she was going to do. She, then, noticed a large pile of junk sprawled in the corner of the Fine Arts room "Maybe there's something in there," Stefani wondered. "I have to win this..." She ran over to the junk, tripping over Katherine in the process. "Hey, watch where you're going, you b--" Katherine stopped and saw it was Stefani. She got up and mysteriously said, "Oh, it's you. Sorry, I thought you were... someone else."

Stefani: (giving a weird look to the confessional) Don't get me wrong, but I think Katherine may have been dropped on her head a couple times.

"No worries!" Stefani got up and ran towards the junk. Katherine caught on to what she was doing, "Hey, she's got the right idea!"

The camera switched scenes to show Ryan trying to take Nalyd's idea of stacking desks alongside a spray canister. Both while running from desk to can, desk to can, they were arguing, as usual. "Why do you always have to make things difficult for me?!" Nalyd panted. Ryan zoomed past him and grabbed the desk Nalyd was about to grab for his stack of desks, "Maybe I thought of this idea first, did you ever think of that? Huh!?" "You know I was doing this before you were!" "Hah! As if!" "I have so many more desks stacked on my can than you do!" Nalyd pointed over to his giant spray can in comparison to Ryan's. "Y-yeah, well... you smell!!" Ryan replied. Nalyd growled, "Well, maybe I wouldn't if you didn't spray the room with your hideous fresheners and perfumes!" Ryan stopped in his tracks, "I'll have you know that they smell better than anything you could ever smell like! If you would take the time to value yourself and smell better, maybe you would have a girlfriend!" This made Nalyd stop in his tracks as well, with a desk in hand. Tears welled up in his eyes, "TAMMI, NO!!"

Ryan: Ugh... Spazz. Why does he care for her? What can she do for him? Other than make him appear less gross in comparison, I guess.

Ryan left Nalyd where he stood and continued stacking desks on his near the spray can he was going to climb. Nalyd wiped his tears and looked over to Stefani and Katherine. The camera rolled over to observe what Stefani and Katherine were tinkering with. Turns out, Stefani found two plungers in the junk pile. Nalyd sniffed, "Workin' lady! Lookin' good!" He let out a weak and inaccurate wolf whistle. Stefani brushed it off and began walking over to the spray canisters. Katherine's head poked out of the junk heap. Picking up everything she named off, she let out, "There's nothing in here except some barbells, some earbuds, and a Playboy magaz-- Ooooooh." She saw that Nalyd was looking at her and quickly tucked the magazine in between her shirt and bra. Nalyd observed the actions and twitched after seeing Katherine nearly show cleavage.

Katherine: The magazine? Oh, I'm gonna, uhh, recycle it. Yeah. Recycle. Nalyd: (stammering) But, but-- Jeff and-- Boobs.. it-it.... WHAT JUST HAPPENED? Katherine: That was mainly to distract Nalyd. Why? (smiles) Because he's funny when he doesn't understand what's going on in life!

Katherine's head went back down into the junk pile in order to find something to help her. Snapping out of his Katherine-trance, Nalyd shook his head and ran over to the last desk he could find in the classroom and grabbed it for his unfinished tower. Climbing up to put it on his stack of desks, he places it and groans, "Great, looks like I have to climb the rest of this..."

Nalyd: ... if that's even possible. (cries)

Ryan, jumping off of his just-as-tall, unfinished tower of desks walked over to Nalyd's spray can. "Oh, gosh and gee. It would be so horrible if these desks--" He pushed the bottom one from out of the stack, causing the stack to crumble, "--would come crashing down!" Panicked and shaking, Nalyd grabbed onto his spray can and watched his desks tumble. "Ryan, will you ever learn to be nice!?" Nalyd shouted, clinging for dear life to his spray can. "But, Nalyd! I am nice! Look what I did!! Now, you won't have to take your desk stack apart, you're welcome!" Ryan laughed his way back over to his desk stack, stealing Nalyd's desks in the process. Nalyd screamed, "This isn't over!!"

Stefani was making quick process with her two plungers; she used them as climbing mechanisms.

Stefani: The way you look at it, I will definitely win this challenge. Everyone else is using too much stuff. All I needed was a plumber's tool.

"Eat it, you guys, eat it and tell me how it tastes!" Stefani snobbishly yelled at everyone. As she said that, an air horn went off. Ryan stopped in his tracks, Nalyd ceased his nervousness, Katherine poked her head out of the junk, and Stefani stopped shouting. Each of them looked up to see Chris with a jetpack on his back, standing alongside Jeff on top of his spray canister. "We have a winner for the first part of the challenge!! It's Jeff!" Chris shouted to each of them. "What!?" Ryan wanted to know, "How?!" Jeff shouted to him, "Dude, I just walked to the blue can and saw grooves on it. I used my hands and feet! Not that hard." "Yay, Jeffrey!!" Katherine shouted from the pile.

Jeff: I've noticed: I have a huge advantage over all the peeps that's left in the competition. I wasn't raised a fool, they all may have been. Mama always told me to look for the obvious. (crosses arms and puts on black shades with blue flames on the temples) Like a boss.

"Congratulations, Jeff!" Chris patted him on the back. Jeff noticed the pat, "I'm not a dog, dude." "Doesn't matter. You know why? Because I don't care. It's what I do... or don't do." "Yeah. Good one, brah."

Nalyd: This... is impossible! He's so close to winning the bet! I can't allow that. I won't. Stefani: (laughs) Ah, well, this challenge has two parts to it. Even if I don't win, I'll feel like a big winner if Nalyd doesn't win this next challenge. (whispers) Let's just say he's gonna need it--if he wants to keep his dignity, that is. Or what's left of it after being here for so long. Does he even have any left?

Chris tightened his body, "As I was saying, doesn't matter. What does matter is that you've earned a ticket into the Final Four, literally!" Chris handed Jeff the very last Hall Pass of the season. "Sweetness!" Jeff cheered. "Listen up, everyone," Chris used his megaphone to shout at the other four. "That was the last Hall Pass of the season! From here on in, if you wanna make sure you're safe, you better get your tails on the ball and start winning some challenges!  You can start with this one!  Jeff!  Once again, congratulations on winning!  Now, because you won, I have some good news and some bad news for you." "Lay it on me, I can take it. I'm a man." "Easy there, sir. The good news is: since you're safe from elimination tonight, you won't have to participate in this challenge!" "Sweet! I knew it!" "Hold on! The bad news is: since you're safe from elimination tonight, you will have to participate in this challenge! Isn't that FUN!?" "No! It makes no sense! What!?"

Ryan: I'll give Chris this one, he had us all confused.

The camera switched scenes to show Katherine on top of the nozzle of the purple canister, Nalyd on the green, Ryan on the red, and Stefani on the pink canister. The camera panned and showed Jeff in front of the canisters' nozzles, suspended in air by rope with one end tied to his hands and another end tied to a pipe in the ceiling. "Chris! What's going on!?" Jeff wondered why he was tied. Chris was using his jetpack and was floating near everyone else. "Well, you won't be competing in this challenge, per sé, but since you're safe anyway, I needed a monke-- a stuntman to help participate in this next part of the challenge!" Jeff struggled in the knot, "Ugh. Where's your intern-dudes!?" "They all claim to be 'in the hospital', or 'avoiding Chef', or 'dead'," Chris said, using his hands for air-quotes. "Anyway, Katherine, Ryan, Stefani, and Nalyd! Your next task is to cover Jeff's front in spray paint with your color of spray!  Your nozzle releases the color of spray paint that you are standing on top of, it's up to you to figure out ways to actually push down on the nozzle to get the paint out.  The nozzles are currently all aimed directly at Jeff, you just have to cover him with your color.  At the end of this, you will hear that air horn that you all love so much and I will declare a winner.  The other three people will be in jeopardy of leaving the school, failing artist style!" Jeff gasped, "Hey, I didn't agree to this!!" "You're already tied up and you won the first challenge. I think you already agreed. In other words, shut up! Now, guys, those nozzles are pretty huge. With an ordinary spray can, it would only take your little finger to press down.  But, these are different.  I think a little more weight is required.  It's up to you to figure this out.  There won't be any questions, so I won't ask. COMMENCE!" Chris flew off in a puff and left the four of them again.

"Great! He's left us here again!" Ryan complained, "Why does he keep doing that!?"

Nalyd: Maybe because he doesn't want to be near you. Stefani: Maybe because he thinks you never stop talking. Katherine: (yelling) Maybe it's because you suck!!

"Maybe it's because he's Chris," Katherine said, smiling. Stefani started pressing her nozzle with her two hands, "C'mon, guys, we can figure this out!" "It's gonna take a lot more power than that," Ryan criticized. "At least I'm trying!" "Doesn't look like you're doing a good job. Now why don't you go back to being crazy girl?"

Stefani: (freaked out voice) Why do people keep saying I'm this crazy girl! I'm Stefani! Calm, level-headed Stefani. I don't understand what they mean by "crazy".

Stefani continued to press down as the camera went over to Katherine. "Hmm, I know! Maybe we're supposed to bite it!!" Katherine wondered. She bit the nozzle, only to injure her lip. "Ow!" "Wow, did that work?" Ryan sarcastically asked. "I don't know, did your mom work for me last night!? No, she didn't. She was too busy on the streets!" Katherine snapped back. Ryan scoffed, closed his eyes, and tilted his head up, snootily. "Dying of old age and boredom over here!!" Jeff yelled at all of them. Nalyd sighed, "This is going nowhere fast, we should probably just give--" Nalyd sat down on his nozzle and green paint whizzed out and splattered all over Jeff's body. "--up?" Nalyd finished his thought. "That's it!!" Nalyd used his behind to increase pressure within the nozzle and more green paint spewed over Jeff. "Hey, yeah!" Katherine looked at Nalyd. She stood on top of her nozzle and, as it went down, a massive amount of purple paint splattered onto Jeff. Sputtering, Jeff shouted, "It's too much!! Pffft-pfft." Katherine got off her nozzle and stopped, "Oh! Sorry, baby!!" "No, Katherine! Babe! You have to keep going! You have to w--" Jeff began sputtering again as pink paint hit his body, courtesy of Stefani's rear-end. "It's working!!" Stefani happily shouted. Ryan looked at all of them, "Uh-uh. No, no. You can't be serious. I'm not about to use my behind to win a challenge." Nalyd heard this, "Ryan, you're so colorless, it's sad. Add some green to your life!" Nalyd aimed his nozzle at Ryan's face and sat on it, covering Ryan's face with green paint. "That's for stealing all of my desks, you light pole!" Nalyd shouted. "Augh!!!" Ryan yelled out, "That's it!" Ryan sat down on his nozzle, spraying Jeff a bit with red paint, and then aimed his nozzle at Nalyd. He, then, stood on it, causing an uproar of red paint to hit Nalyd's pale, white face. "Looks good on you, it really compliments that dull, gray hoodie--- NOT." Ryan and Nalyd then began having a spray paint fight. Nalyd was covered in red and Ryan was covered in green.

Jeff: It's like they didn't even want to win the challenge. Stefani: I took advantage of Ryan and Nalyd's, uhhh, fight. If they don't want to win, or well, (points to herself) someone has to. But, there's also Katherine... (confessional cuts off)

Katherine was, then, seen jumping on her nozzle, spritzing huge amounts of purple paint on Jeff. "More, baby! More!!" Jeff was getting doused with ample amounts of pink and overwhelming amounts of purple.

Katherine: Is it me or was Jeff enjoying that challenge a bit too much? Jeff: (covered in paint) Hey, it was bonding time for us! Don't judge.... DUDE! (throws a rock at the confessional camera, cracking it)

An air horn sounded and Chris flew into the scene to collect the results on Jeff. He saw a greater amount of purple on Jeff than any other color. He, then, looked at Nalyd and Ryan who were still fighting and spraying each other. He flew down near them, causing both to stop, "You know, if you guys aimed at the right person, both of you would have tied and won this challenge! But, it's looking like the opposite... kind of.  Katherine wins immunity from tonight's ceremony!" "Yes!" Katherine let off a final jump on the nozzle, slipped, and fell off her huge canister, impacting the floor. "I'm okay!!" Stefani looked over at Jeff and then at Nalyd, "You know what that means!!" Jeff smiled while Nalyd looked confused. Dripping with red paint, Nalyd asked, "What? What are you talkin-- " Nalyd stopped talking. "Wait, no! That's not fair! He distracted me!!" Stefani and Jeff began laughing. Chris saw them start chuckling and joined in for no apparent reason. Ryan was left confused, "What?! What's so funny!? WHAT!?"

The camera switched scenes to showing everyone in the Detention Hall Ceremony in Gilded Glory High School. The camera panned to Jeff, still dripping with purple and pink paint, mostly. He looked at everyone then at his handheld voting device, as the schoolmates were going to use those over voting in the confessional. He clicked a face and submitted his vote.

Jeff: Dude. The choice is obvious. The Final Four is looking better and better, without that let-down.

The camera zoomed to Nalyd. He submitted his vote.

Nalyd: It's either Ryan or Stefani... Who do you think I chose? Actually, no. Don't even answer that. It's far too obvious and it will insult me. Mind you, my plan is entering part 2 of 2. Part 1 was getting rid of Ryan's last link here: Lilie. After this vote, it'll come to a close. (smiles) Where's my check?

Stefani was shown staring at her voting device. She was tapping her finger on her desk and really giving the device bad looks.

Stefani: I remember earlier today Nalyd said he wanted us to vote with him and he was making a lot of sense. Even if that's the case, why am I having a hard time actually deciding who I should really pick?!

Ryan was shown angrily tapping Nalyd's face on his handheld, in a rather obvious fashion. "You know, we're not supposed to know who you choose," Katherine warned. "What of it!? He's going down anyway!"

Ryan: I'm not counting anyone out of this competition just yet except for him! HE'S OUT. Katherine: You can just feel the tension and level of awkwardness in that room.... and in this one. It smells like Ryan-stank.

"Well, it seems that tonight's vote was really hard for some of you!" Chris came in, stating. "Well, let's get to it, then! I have 4 Golden A+'s here. Remember these? The safe-havens? Yeah, these.  The first two will be going to our power couple, Katherine and Jeff, for winning the challenges today!" Chris tossed them to the two. Both were making out at the time and caught the A's simultaneously. "Right," Chris continued. "Obviously, Stefani, you receive the third one." He tossed the next-to-last Golden A+ to Stefani, who squealed. Nalyd and Ryan both looked at Stefani, and then to Chris when they heard their names. "Nalyd. Ryan. Down to the two babies." "Hey!" Both of them said at once. "Calm down, it's only true. Now... probably one of the most dramatic endings to a ceremony yet, the final Golden A+ goes to..." Nalyd and Ryan both exchanged looks. Ryan stared daggers at Nalyd and pursed his lips. Nalyd let out a small growl and stuck his tongue out at Ryan. "Well, it's gonna go to Ryan!" Chris said, spiking the Golden A+ to Ryan's head. It clanged on his head, causing him to pass out. "WHAT!? HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!?" Nalyd screamed. "Well, there's these great handheld devices--maybe you've heard of them--they vote-" "I KNOW, McLean! I mean, how!?" Nalyd looked back at Jeff and Stefani, who both looked up and began whistling. Nalyd peered, "What happened!? I thought you wanted him out!" "Well, dude, we did," Jeff started. "But, we kinda figured that you're the bigger threat... at least those were Katherine's thoughts," Stefani finished. Nalyd stammered, "What!? Katherine?" He looked at her. "Hi." she smiled. "What the heck, man?" "Huh? Oh. Yeah. I was just tired of looking at you." "Time's up!!" Chris cut in, grabbing Nalyd's head. He was about to throw Nalyd out until Jeff shouted, "Chris, wait?! Forgetting something, Nalyd?" Nalyd sighed.

The camera switched scenes to show Chris, Jeff, Katherine, and Stefani outside of Gilded Glory. "Ready when you are, dude!!" Jeff shouted. "Do I really have to do this?" "Yes, you lost the bet! You didn't win the challenge! It's not our fault that you got eliminated, bro!" "Oka-- Wait! Yes, it is!!" "Whatever! We're ready!" Nalyd groaned and ran out of Gilded Glory, naked, and covered in different spray paint colors that made him look like a human rainbow. He began singing, "Up, up, up, up!! Sing, sing, sing, sing!" Chris's eyes widened and he fell out laughing alongside Jeff and Stefani. Nalyd's voice trailed in the distance as he fled from the school, "Come fly with us! Come fly with u-- I'll get you all for this!"

Chris went over towards the front of the camera, still laughing, "And, with that number, we're down to four. Tune in next time for another spectacular episode of the best--hopefully, Ryan will still be passed out--the one, the only, Total. Drama. 1-0-1." The screen was then shown to fade to black.

Chapter Twenty-Three: Commander in Briefs
Chris walked in front of the camera, "Wow, it feels like it's been 2 years since I've done this." The camera closed in on his face as he whispered, "Only a few of you will get that joke. Anyway!  On the last Total Drama 1-0-1:  Ahh, the joys beauties of art... and then there's the crap that these losers had to do!  Our Final Five had to participate in a two-part challenge that tested their minds, their strength, and definitely their stupidity!  The paintbrushes and palettes were flying when Jeff won the first challenge: mounting a tall, god-like spray canister.  Once he won, I remembered that I still needed some, uhh, 'help' with the second part of the challenge.  So, Jeff willingly helped me out with part two: the great spray-off!  Katherine, Stefani, Ryan, and Nalyd all had to use the remaining huge spray cans to spray Jeff and, the color that showed up mostly on Jeff, would be the victor and the winner of that invincibility that they all want oh, so much!  Throughout the day, you could not keep Nalyd and Ryan from the other one's throat... literally. I've never seen so much hostility, so much anger--I loved it all!"

Chris began laughing. "Oh, but it had to come to a close when Nalyd's plans came crumbling down when Katherine, the winner of the challenge, convinced Jeff and Stefani to kick him off over Ryan for being more threatening towards the final episodes of the Total Drama 101 soap opera! With Nalyd cast out, World Tour-style, we are down to four faithful, fateful schoolmates:  Jeff the Great, Stefani the Cracked, Katherine the Brave, and Ryan the Not!  It's time for all of them to be put to the test in this most exciting and most shocking episode yet of Total. Drama. 1-0-1!"

After the theme song ended, the camera was shown viewing the foyer of the mansion where Katherine and Ryan were being conversational. "So, you were dropped on your head?" Katherine wondered, scratching her own. Ryan raised an eyebrow, "What? No! How can you conclude that? Are you dumb!?" "No... In fact, I'm asking if you are," Katherine replied, referring to the question she just asked. "No. There's no way that I'm stupid. If I was, I wouldn't have gotten this far in this stupid game!"

Katherine: Well, that isn't really accurate. Heck, look how far I've gotten. It wasn't my brain, (baby voice) 'twas my heart. (pause, a record scratch was heard) JKBRO. (holds up fists) I got here with these, man. Wit' these!

"I guess you have a point," Katherine lied. "You don't seem to have many of those usually, I'll give you that one." "Thank you," Ryan smiled, then realized what she said. "Wait, what!? What's that supposed to mean?" "I'm just saying--you say a lot of stupid stuff. I don't see how you can have points when talking to people." She paused, "Periods, maybe, but most certainly not points." "You know, I don't need this," Ryan threw out.

Ryan: In fact, I think I may have just found my next (air quotes) point. And, by that, I mean my next mark. Her. Period.

"Of course you need this!" Katherine reassured him. "You don't take criticism well." "How can you say that?!" "See? There it is, there. Stop shouting all the time." "I don't need fixing. I'm beyond perfect." Ryan affirmed. "Denial." Ryan looked at her, "What do you know about fixing people??" "Accusation." Ryan scoffed and grumbled after Katherine uttered 'accusation', "I will put you in a hospital and not look back!" "Hmm... Malevolence." He looked as if his head was about to explode, "Whatever! It doesn't even matter!" Katherine laughed and made a 'check mark' symbol in the air, "And, finally, indifference!" "Why do you keep saying words as if you know what they mean?!" "I was going to see if you would complete the D.A.M.N. Model--which, like I thought, you did, you little tiger!" "The... the what?!" "The D.A.M.N. Model. If you complete the D.A.M.N. Model," She walked over to Ryan and stretched her hand onto his shoulder. "Then, all people can do is go up to you, shake their heads, and just say '... damn'." Ryan grumbled and slapped her hand off of his body.

Ryan: Oooooh! She thinks she is so cool! Someone needs to bring her down a peg or two... or twenty!

"Denial. Accusation. Malevolence. Indifference. D. A. M. N. Damn," she spelled out to Ryan in shame. "Uhh, Einstein, last time I checked, 'indifference' began with an 'I' not an 'N'. Idiot." Katherine put her hand on his shoulder, "Wow. You have to sweat the small stuff. Just... Just... Wow. Just damn." She sighed, referencing the model again to Ryan's disgust. "You know what!? Whatever! Where's Jeff? Maybe I should go talk to smarter people!" He stormed off towards Jeff's room door. "He's got a point," Katherine uttered to herself, following Ryan. Ryan pounded on Jeff's door, "Hey, beachboy! Get up, the challenge is probably gonna start soo-- Wait, what am I doing!?"

Ryan: And, that's when I realized I was actually being nice to someone... that I'm competing with... for money! I'm taking advantage of this opportunity!

Ryan stopped pounding on the door and immediately ran off, "Seeya, suckers! Chris will probably announce the challenge soon. Nothing like a headstart in getting you eliminated!" Katherine brushed what Ryan said off as it didn't phase her.

Katherine: (pointing at the door of the confessional, talking about Ryan) What he doesn't realize is that he's alone. Like the kid at a party with everything on his face: glasses, too much hair, acne, yellow teeth, the works and nothing on his arm--like a date. He reminds me exactly of that kind of person. It's sad that I can think of all of this right off the top of my head. But, yeah, he's alone. Everyone's gone and nobody's helping him. It's only a matter of time before he realizes it--or goes crazy, whichever comes first. (stares into the camera) Yeah, (bleep), I can be deep.

Katherine let herself into Jeff's room while knocking, "Jeffie, honey, you've been asleep for awhile. It's time to--Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!" Katherine let out a scream to what she beheld. The camera panned over to Jeff's bed and in it were a sleeping Jeff and a snoring Stefani, shirtless. Katherine's scream woke up only Jeff and it caused him to scream. "WHAT!? WHAT!?" he yelled at his door. Katherine pointed to Jeff's left; Jeff turned around and saw Stefani shirtless, which caused him to scream again. Katherine clenched her fists as Stefani continued to snore, "What is this!?" "Babe, ba-babe," Jeff stammered, "I swear, we didn't do anything! I have no idea how she got here!" "Then why is she there!?" "I'm just as lost as you are!! We didn't do anything!" Tears welled up in Katherine's eyes, "I can't believe this!" Jeff saw that his girlfriend was hurt and, right as he was going to try to wake Stefani up, Chris came on the megaphone. "Attention all schoolmates minus Ryan, report to Room 125 of the GG! It's time for you guys to do some running!" The tears had now began rolling down Katherine's eyes, "I can't believe this!"

Jeff: I'm tellin' you, I went to bed really early-like than usual! And, I went to bed by myself! (grabs the confessional camera) You believe me, don't you, dudes!? I've been tricked.

"Stefani! GET UP!" Jeff shouted, angrily. He pulled his covers off of his bed to reveal that Stefani wasn't wearing anything but a pair of tight, blue briefs with a white "J" painted on the crotch area, as Stefani continued to snore. Katherine and Jeff both gasped sharply. "What!?" Jeff looked at Stefani. Katherine mumbled, "I can't believe you. That's your dumb underwear!" "No!" Jeff looked back at Katherine. "This is not what it looks like, Kat! It-it--" A record scratch noise is heard. "Wait, how do you know that's my underwear?" Katherine looked shocked, "Because I snooped ar-- What!? Forget that! Nevermind how I know! I'm the one that's supposed to be angry here!" "Katherine, babe, I'm angry, too! I don't know how this happened!" "You were gonna be my best friend, my boyfriend, my knight in shining armor, my boy toy of joy, my... my... my butt buddy!" Katherine cried. Jeff got out of bed, "I still can be those things! I can! You just have to believe me!!" As Jeff got out of bed, Katherine continued to drown herself in her tears.

Katherine: (crying waterfalls of tears) I'll never love again! Not like this!! How could he!? After everything!? This doesn't add up! (Katherine's tears stopped rolling and she then clenched her fists) Wait a minute!! (confessional cut off)

"Wait!" Katherine shouted. An angry, evil look then entered her face as she ran out of Jeff's room and ran towards the Gilded Glory High School. "Katherine? Katherine!!" Jeff yelled as she left. "It's no use." Stefani's snoring got even louder, which began to annoy Jeff. He ran back over to his bed and began slapping Stefani's face, as he didn't know what to do. "Dude! Stefani! Get up!!" He slapped her once more and Stefani's eyes opened immediately at wide angles. She saw Jeff and slowly put her hands on his face and laughed, "You're a boy." Confused, Jeff shook his head, "What!? Yeah, I'm a guy!" "That means you have... toes." "Everyone has toes, Stefani! Now, tell me how did you get in my bed?!" Stefani ignored him, rolled over, and vibrated the bed with her laughter.

Jeff: Dude, she's like 15 different people. You never know what to expect and, since we're almost done with this game, it's getting really, really old.

"Man! Whatevs, dude. Handle this on your own," Jeff ultimately said, as he ran out of his room, leaving Stefani. "I want a hound dog!!" Stefani randomly yelled as Jeff left.

The scene switched to show Jeff running into Room 125 to see Katherine choking Chris with Ryan, in a lawn-chair, watching with popcorn. "You did this, didn't you!? Didn't you!?" Katherine was shaking his body. Jeff noticed this and immediately ran over to Katherine and Ryan. "Break it up! Katherine! Let him go!" Jeff ran towards Katherine and tried to pull him away from Chris. Katherine ignored Jeff, "This pansy poser with stubble did this! I know it!" Jeff finally pulled Katherine away from Chris. Chris caught his breath, "Dude!! You are insane! Literally crazy! I don't even know what you're talking about!" "You put Stefani in Jeff's bed last night and took her clothes off!" Chris began awkwardly laughing, "Heh heh... uhh... what?" "You--you--," Katherine looked at Chris and had a quick realization. "You really didn't do it." "Calm down there, Sin City. I don't have to cut in to make this show any more dramatic than it already is! That's your job and I live off of it!" "Dude, why didn't you stop them?!" Jeff yelled out at Ryan. "What? And miss this show? Chris was about to die and Katherine could have gotten eliminated. That was almost a win-win situation for me. Closer to finally winning."

Ryan: (looks into the confessional camera) What!? She has to be eliminated sometime. There's no way she's gonna win with that grief. (a TD101 producer is heard laughing outside the confessional) Oh, oh, oh. You think that's funny!? I'll give you something to laugh at! (storms out of the confessional; confessional cuts off instantly)

Chris cracked his neck in order to get it back in the correct sockets, "Owwww. Finally, we can start this challenge... unless Katherine decides she wants to kill one of us." The camera panned over to Katherine, who still seemed to be upset about the situation at hand as her arms were crossed and her eyes were closed. "Anyway," Chris continued, "Welcome, Final Four, to your next challen-- Wait." "Yeah," Ryan cut in. "You may want to check your eyes. We're short one other crazy girl." "Where's Stefani?" Katherine grumbled, "Probably waiting in Jeff's room in his bed with sultry music playing." "Katherine! We didn't do anything!" Jeff begged her to believe this fact. "I don't understand how sh--" At that point, Jeff was cut off because of commotion heard behind them. Everyone turned around to the door of Room 125. "Gov'ment came... said I had to co-come here for my cheese," Stefani randomly said at the entrance of the room, confused. Stefani was still shown to be wearing literally nothing but the same briefs she had on earlier. "Welcome Stefani, everyone...," Chris sarcastically shouted. "... who seems to be at an absence of clothes... again. Excuse me, while I make a call." Chris, then, walked off-screen of the camera, pulling his cell phone off. Ryan put his hands on his face, "Why am I still here? Surrounded by these... idiots?" "Uh-huh. Yeah. Yeah, wel-- Yeah." Chris could be heard from where he was standing as the camera went back to face him, "Yeah. No, of course not. Yeah, well, she's naked again. Are we allowing that? Uh-huh. Yeah, yea-- You're kidding. You got one!? I'm totally coming to see it after this is--" "Chris!" Jeff, Ryan, and Katherine shouted out. "Where's my dairy?!" Stefani angrily and dazedly yelled at Chris. Chris hung up on the TD101 producer, "Oh, sorry, as you all know, my level of care isn't really that high. Anyway! That was a producer from the show.  Since this is still a kids show... somehow, I wanted to ask about Stefani's 'outfit' and if she could wear just, uhh, that.  The dude says we're severely lacking in male viewers so he's allowing it!"

Ryan and Katherine smacked their heads as Stefani kept shouting how much she wanted cheese for some reason. "Stefani! There is. No. Cheese!" Ryan said, rubbing his head. "I'm getting a migraine." "I'm sure Katherine has some Midol, bro," Jeff said, laughing. Ryan peered at him and clenched his fist. Ryan walked over to Jeff and was about to say something but was cut off by Katherine, "You know wh--" "YOU do not have the right to tell him what I have! Not until I get to the bottom of this!"

Jeff: This is driving me insane. I already miss her. She's like my bro! But... she's, like, a girl. And she's cooler than all my bros back home. 'Cept Brady, he's--wait! And Brady. She's cooler than all of them! She's like a-a super-bro. (awkward pause; Jeff stares into the camera) Does that all make sense?

"Can I please get back control of my own show!? Thank you!" Chris walked over to the Final Four. "Stefani, we will make sure you don't receive any cheese for the rest of today." "What'chu say to me!?" Stefani replied, getting in a fighting stance as she dazedly shouted out, "Oooooooh! Ooooh!  Hold my earrings!  And... and my right shoe!  It's about to go down!" "Stefani, you're not wearing any of those things," Jeff pointed out. "Just hold'em!" Jeff groaned and, not knowing what else to do, held his hands out as if items were in them. "Boy," Chris wondered. "If this is how you guys are going to act, you are definitely not going to be cut out for today's challenges. It's Politics time!" Jeff's annoyed look turned into a confused one as Ryan went from being annoyed to ecstatic.

Ryan: Finally. My time to actually shine. As President! President of... of... LIFE! (puts a fist in the air and grins evilly into the confessional camera) All Hail Your Ruler for Life, Ryan!

"Listen carefully! There are 4 of you here--granted, I see 3 because I don't think Stefani should count because of her current status--and you're all either about to become running-mates or enemies for the office!  Your first task is to figure out which you're going to be!  Two of you will be 'running for President' and the other two will be 'running as Vice-Presidents' for the two Presidents!" "Oh, that sounds fun!" Katherine told him. "Yes, yes, now obviously, none of you will really be the President of anything," Chris continued. After hearing this, Ryan groaned and snapped his fingers. "But, maybe you'll figure out your career or something after this is over! Now, who wants to be President!?" Ryan snobbishly stepped forward, "Boy, what a stupid, idiotic question. Of course I'm running.  And, I'll run my competition into the ground!" A light bulb went off in Katherine's mind as she gasped and ran over to Ryan. "And, I'll be your Vice-President!" she yelled. "What?" both Chris and Jeff said at the same time.

Katherine: Remember what I said earlier about Ryan being so alone? Yes, he's a bad person, (angelic music plays in the background) but maybe all he needs is a friend. (a record scratch is heard off-screen; music stops playing) No, I'm totally kidding! I'm only running with him because there's no way I'm working with either of those cheaters! Plus, I'm a party girl and Ryan's a boring dud. This is exactly what he needs... for me to win!

"Well, there's no way I'm working with either of you," Katherine uttered to Jeff and Stefani. She walked over to Ryan and awaited Chris' further instructions. Tears began to impishly well in Jeff's eyes. Stefani walked over to Jeff, stumbling over herself and catching herself on his body. Draped over his chest, she utters, "D-don't let that-that, that whatever-it-is get you down. We can-we can win this!  Wait, what's your name again?" Jeff sighed and walked away from Stefani towards Chris, causing her to hit the floor violently. "Hey!! Oh, wait. This floor is comfortable as (bleep).  Thank you!!" Stefani shouted out. "So, Jeff? I'm ready to hear your State of the Union. Did you and Stefani come to a decision?" Chris wondered. "Brah, there's no way that she can run for President. She's dazed and confused, I think.  Either that or she hit her head right before she went to sleep.  So, I'll run for President, she can be my VP-dude." "And that settles it! Ryan and Jeff are our Presidents and Katherine and Stefani are our Vice-Presidents!" Chris shouted as he pointed to a screen suspended above him.

Jeff studied the screen and began thinking.

Jeff: Chris' instructions say that the VPs have to compete in the first challenge and Ryan and I have to compete in the second one. At this rate, I'll be away from Katherine all day. So, I thought to myself, 'Brohah, what can you do about this?' And that's when I had an idea. Sorry, I'm not that used to those.

"Chris!" Jeff shouted before Chris began explaining. "Stefani and I talked and we decided to switch positions! I'll be her VP and she'll run for President!" The camera panned over to show Stefani petting one of her own bare breasts and eating a corn dog using her other hand. Chris laughed, "You really think that can be President!? Sorry, bro, but the board and the host have both spoken and they're both never wrong." Chris winked to the camera. Jeff thought on his feet, "But, what about the fans? Especially the females?" "Huh?" "You'll lose a lot of your female viewers if they see that the only two guys are going after the seat of power, the President's seat! Think about it, dude!" Jeff smiled and looked over at Katherine, who ignored him. She took out her lip gloss and started putting it on to distract herself from him. Chris took a second to think about what Jeff said. Jeff walked closer to Chris, "Just think: You don't want them trying to sue the show. Since Stefani's almost naked and there's no girls running for President, they have a lot of grounds to force Total Drama into Total Bankruptcy.

Chris: I hate to say it, but (points to confessional door, signifying talking about Jeff) chill-pills-for-brains has a point. And the last thing this show needs is another lawsuit from a whole bunch of Courtneys. We're still in debt from getting this school built!

"She could be their role model!" Jeff said, pointing to Stefani. "Roll over what?" Stefani yelled with a full mouth. "You know," Chris said, "you have a point!" Katherine immediately stopped applying lip gloss, "What!?" "Stefani, you'll be running for President with Jeff as your running-mate!" Chris announced as the edits were made on the screen.

"Great job, Jeff," Chris congratulated him. "Whatever, that just made my job easier," Ryan assured everyone. Katherine joined in, "We'll take them both down." Jeff overheard this and immediately frowned.

Jeff: I don't care about many things, man. Academics, most friends, nothing. But, that girl. Katherine, the love of my life, is trying to keep herself from me. Anything can happen when love is on the line, dude! And that's when that idea popped into my head to switch my positions with (groans) Stefani. I guess I'm only really intuitive when it comes to Kat. Huh, 'intuitive'. Ordinarily, I wouldn't even know how to say that word. It's gotta be Katherine doing this to me. You hear me, Katherine!? I know you hate me now but I'm gonna make you love me again! (sobs)

Chris walked Jeff over to Katherine, "Great! Ryan, Stef, you both can take a break before your challenge. It's time for your right-hand men to help you out with the first challenge!" Katherine cleared her throat loudly which caused Chris to say, "Oh, sorry. Wait, no I'm not!  It's time for the first challenge!

The camera switched scenes to show Jeff and Katherine in the bigger part of the city, filled with passersby and fast-moving pedestrians. "Gentleman... and Katherine... this is your battlefield! Each person you see walking by or walking around are your targets and the other person you're competing against is holding the key to your victory or maybe even the key to their own victory if you don't stop them!  Your task is to act as your Presidents' right-hand running-mates and convince these people to vote for your respected running-mate.  So, Jeff, you will be trying to tell these people to vote for Stefani and Katherine, you'll be doing the same for Ryan.  This will test your winning smiles, your creativity, and your ability to improvise!  Each of these people know of what's going on and, if you don't convince, nothing is stopping them from voting for the other candidate.  After you have talked to your voter, have them come to this location to me so they can actually 'vote' for someone.  The Vice-President that wins this challenge will win a significant advantage for his or her running-mate for their challenge to come! Questions?" Jeff and Katherine both raised their hands. Chris looked at them, "You guys know me better than that! You must stop haggling the voters when you hear my beautiful air horn! Get to it!!"

Katherine: I am not going to think about partying. I'm not going to think about chilling poolside with my sister. I'm most certainly not going to think about Cheater McCheatypants! (sniffles) I'm going to think about getting Ryan these votes. I have never been this focused before. Never. Well, except that time I played Truth or Dare with my friends at my old school. I was determined to do everything they threw at me! Unfortunately, my determination caused me to run naked into my old crush's house with a paddle in one hand and a piece of paper in another hand. Needless to say, I found him and gave him the paper, which said "I've been a bad student, teach me a lesson."

Jeff and Katherine darted into the public with ideas in mind. The camera approached Jeff first as he tried to run to an older female and what looked to be her child. "Uh, dude? Dude!" Jeff called out to her. Not hearing anything, the elder kept walking with her what looked like her son behind her. He looked over at Katherine who seemed to already be having success with her voters. Jeff finally ran in front of the lady, "Hey! Hey!" "I don't know you!!!" the lady screamed, smacking Jeff with her huge purse and walking off faster. The smack made a giant bump swell up on his forehead. "Mommy, why are you so weird?" the little boy's voice trailed off as he tried to keep up with her. "Never tell 'em nothin'!" she yelled back at him. Jeff wasn't able to see either of them. He set his eyes on a couple next.

The camera panned over to Katherine. "Just walk over there to where that awkward man in the blue shirt is standing and vote for Ryan! You won't regret it!" Katherine explained to a gentleman. "Well, what is this 'Ryan' planning to do for me, as a citizen?" Katherine stared at him for a few seconds and then scolded him, "Look, buddy, I don't know what you want. I don't know what he can do for you, that sounds gross, anyway. I just know that he needs votes. So go flippin' vote for him!" As Katherine was saying this, the man was beginning to get scared. He agreed and ran over to Chris to vote.

Katherine: Don't look at me like that--assuming you're looking at me like I think you are. You are, aren't you!? You would have done the same thing!! (gets frustrated) Ugh, I shouldn't be this wrecked about things!

Katherine darted for a young-looking gentleman next, much shorter than she was. "Hello, little cutie, how old are you?" She asked him, smiling. "47," a craggily, deep voice answered her, as he began to look angry. "Oh. Oh, okay. Big cutie. Have you voted today!?" she asked, awkwardly. He looked at her, "Can I vote for you to get out of my face?" He punched Katherine's shin and she went down. She began groaning and moaning in pain. Jeff was seen thanking voters when he heard Katherine's agony calls, "Yes, yes, right over there, where he's st-- Katherine!!" He ran from the couple he was talking to, accidentally knocking down the wife while he was charging to get to Katherine. "Dear! Dear! Are you alright!?" the man knelt down towards her. "Tires, tires everywhere," she responded to him, confused.

"Katherine! Are you okay!?" he got on his knees to tend to her. She kept moaning and groaned even louder to drown out Jeff's voice. Jeff looked sad, "Please say something, dude!" Katherine smugly told him, "Something!! Now, leave!" Katherine got up and started to walk off but Jeff grabbed her arm. "Let go!" she yelled. Jeff gasped and, knowing she was serious, did as she said, watching her walk off.

Jeff: I had to do something about this. This idea is beginning to turn horrible.

Katherine went over to a large group of males as Jeff stopped trying to give Stefani votes and observed. "Hey, guys! Have you all voted today!?" Katherine projected to all of them. The males all huddled up together and large amounts of whispering was heard.

Katherine: How hard is it to say 'yes' or 'no'? Really?

The group pushed one of the guys away from the group and towards Katherine. "Alright, fine!" he told them, "Uhh, voted for what?" Katherine raised an eyebrow, "That's it? That's all you had to say. Any one of you could have said that!" They all stared at Katherine with blank expressions on their faces. "Helloooooooo?" she knocked in the air, as if knocking on a door or someone's head. One of the guys in the back spoke up, "You're really hot!" Jeff immediately gasped and continued to watch. Katherine put on a fake smile, "Oh, gee, isn't that just the best thing I've ever-- GET OVER THERE AND VOTE FOR RYAN!" All of the boys, fearful, ran over to where Katherine was pointed and trampled over Chris, trying to get a ballot.

Jeff: Okay, that was definitely not like Katherine. But, I'm noticing something. She's being mean in order to get Ryan votes, and she's not usually like that. I try to put the Jeff charm on the people here, and they shut me down. Not cool. I'll try what she's doing. It seems to be working.

Jeff ran off from Katherine's location and approached a lady, walking. He stopped her and viciously yelled, "Hey, you! Get over there to that table and vote for Stefani! Now!!" The lady screamed for her life when Jeff grabbed her, broke free, and ran the opposite direction of the table, "He's evil!! He's just so evil!!" Jeff scratched his head, confused, and thought he would try again with an older man he found. The man was sitting at a bench. Jeff casually walked towards the man and sat down next to him to get his attention. "Hey, sonny!" the older man happily greeted Jeff. "'Sup, dude?" "Uhh... Yes," the man looked confused as to what Jeff said. Jeff put his hand on the man's shoulder and told him, "Hey, dude, I'm gonna need you... to... get your butt over to that table and go vote for my friend, Stefani!! NOW!!  Please?" "What the--" the man said. He stopped himself, grabbed his cane next to him, and smacked Jeff with it multiple times. He walked off and began complaining, "Can't believe what that little gutter child said to me. Where are the children I grew up with? Back in my day..." His voice trailed off. Jeff smacked his head instantly, "What am I doing wrong?!" A little boy, carrying a lollipop, was about to walk past him. "What's wrong with me, dude!?" Jeff yelled to himself. The little boy thought Jeff was yelling at him, started crying in front of Jeff, and then ran away causing Jeff to sigh and look down. Taking advantage of this, Katherine looked over at Jeff and his failure to bask in it, but something didn't feel right. Jeff immediately jerked his head up and saw Katherine staring at him; Katherine tried to play it off by whistling and looking in a different direction.

Jeff ran over to Katherine and grabbed her before she could get away. "Katherine," he began. "Please, you have to believe me." "We've already been through this. why should I believe anything you say anymore?!" "I promise, dude. If you knew me back home, you would know that I would never go out of my way to do so much for someone that I think is beautiful and someone I'm proud to call mine." This caused Katherine to immediately gasp and blush. Jeff continued, "Babe, I can't explain Stefani. You should know that if I could, I would. I don't care for her as much as I care for you. I wouldn't have tried to rig the challenge so we'd be together if I didn't. I wouldn't be making a fool out of myself in front of these weird people if I didn't. I... I love you, du-- Katherine." Katherine's smile grew even bigger as she finally hugged Jeff, "You're... you're telling the truth. I know you are. I don't know why I didn't realize this earlier. Can you... forgive me?" "Already done, babe," Jeff confirmed, as they shared a kiss. "Now, let's rock this challenge!" "Yeah, let's--" Katherine was cut off by Chris' airhorn.

"And, the voting is closed!" Chris yelled to Jeff and Katherine. "Katherine and Ryan win by a huge landslide!" Katherine immediately started cheering, grabbed Jeff's hand, and ran over to Chris' location. "Congratulations, Mrs. Diva, with your win, Ryan will be getting a huge advantage in the next challenge! And that will be starting right now!!"

Jeff: Oh, well. I'm not that bummed out. I didn't win for Stefani, but I won for myself. I have my Katherine back. I can lose until I get eliminated now and be just fine with everything. I have (baby voice) Katherine. (smiles)

Jeff and Katherine reported back to the room, where Ryan and Stefani were seen on a stage. Ryan was standing behind a podium while Stefani, still almost-completely naked with only Jeff's briefs on to show for it, was sitting on the edge of the stage with her legs together. Jeff and Katherine stared in awe as both said, "She's still naked?" "What did you expect? I mean, really?" Ryan answered them. "She's been babbling about some of the most random things. I think she suffered some type of brain trauma last night--or when she was born--I'm leaning on 'when she was born'." "Can we get some clothes on her?" Jeff asked Chris. Chris assured him, "That thing is kinda getting old. Okay, we can--" Chris was cut off by a paper that was shoved in his face by someone off-screen. "Oh, oh! According to this, ratings have went through the roof and the male population is actually bigger than the female one right now!" Katherine butted in, "Wait, how can someone figure that out now?" "Doesn't matter, numbers never lie." "Except when they do," Ryan corrected him. "Whatevs. She stays how she is. Maybe they'll go up even higher! Anyway, you all shouldn't even be focused on lack of clothing, you should be focused on lack of time. This challenge will probably go by faster than you are expecting it to!" Jeff and Katherine immediately started cheering. "What!? No! This is my time to tell the world what I can do for myself! I mean, for it!" Ryan shouted at Chris. "Calm down, calm down. And listen up! Originally, I was going each candidate 10 minutes to give a speech on why they should be President of... whatever they want it to be of." He began stretching, "But, since I've had a long day of being trampled by people voting for you both, I'm giving Stefani and Ryan 30 seconds to 'wow' me as to why you should. Oh, and get this!  Winner, wins the challenge; loser, gets their butts kicked out of this election for good!  Still cheering over there, you guys?!" Chris looked over at Jeff and Katherine who both seemed to be frozen in fear, as they both still had their arms in the air from cheering earlier. The camera panned over to Stefani, who was sucking on her microphone as if it were a sucker; then to Ryan, who had the most confident smile on his face.

Ryan: Is there such a thing as something being this easy? With the Final Three being me and the two lovebirds, getting to the end will be a cinch. I mean, we have 30 seconds to talk to Chris! What's Stefani gonna talk about? Bras? (laughs a bit)

"Also, Katherine. First off, congratulations to you and Jeff, the Vice-Presidents are safe and will be safe to go to the Final Three due to this quick sudden-death elimi-lection.  Ha. 'Elimi-lection'.  Also, for winning the first challenge for Ryan, Ryan will be getting an additional fifteen seconds for his survival speech.

Ryan: (Ryan's legs are shown as laughs on the floor even harder than earlier)

Ryan was shown at his podium, waiting. "Alright, Ryan, you have 45 seconds to present to me a great speech as to why you should be 'President'! Begin" Chris stated, starting his stopwatch.

Ryan: Time to put the old Ryan charm on them all. It's foolproof and fail-proof.

Ryan began his speech:

(Ryan's speech start) Ryan: (walks away from the podium, speaks a bit slower for emphasis) Some people think a great leader is made by someone who cares about just the education. Some want a great leader who thinks freedom is the top concern. I have friends that think a leader should concentrate on leading by religion, by example, and maybe even by personal opinion. (starts pacing) Well, I don't think a leader should just limit himself or herself to just one quality, no. One quality is enough. I dream of a-- Chris: Time's up!! (stops stopwatch) (Ryan's speech end)

"What!?" Ryan immediately shouted. "But, I didn't even get to say anything!!" Chris jotted notes down on a pad, "You said enough." Grumbling, Ryan stomped off the stage. "Next up, Stefani! Stefani?" Chris said. He looked around for Stefani and saw that she was passed out on the stage, gripping the briefs she was wearing. "Helloooooo? Stefani?" Chris called out to her. "What are you waiting on!? She's up there! Start the time!" Ryan shouted in Chris' face, starting his stopwatch for him.

(Stefani's speech start) Stefani: ... Chris, Jeff, and Katherine: (stared with blank expressions on faces) Jeff: Stefani, wake up!! Ryan: (chuckles quietly, runs over to Jeff and puts his hand over Jeff's mouth) Stefani: ... Katherine: Dude!! (chucks a textbook towards Stefani, it hits her face) Stefani: (screams immediately) Ryan: What!? My own VP!? Stefani: PINEAPPLES FOR ALL!! Chris: Time's up!! (stops stopwatch) (Stefani's speech end)

"Yes!!" Ryan yelled, punching Jeff in his excitement, "Oh. Oops." Jeff and Katherine hung their heads as Chris stopped Stefani's timer. "Well, that was interesting," Chris continued. Ryan butted in, "You better believe it was!" "I guess it's time to review!" "You better believe it is!" "Can they each have more time?" Katherine asked Chris. "What do I look like, a genie? One chance only, not two or three."

The scene transitioned to show Jeff, Katherine, Stefani, and Ryan standing outside of Gilded Glory with Chris walking out of Gilded Glory and towards them. "Well, I'm finished... and it took all of 8 seconds to decide," Chris informed them all. "Wow, that fast?" Jeff asked. "Jeffrey. Don't insult his intelligence!" Ryan said with a fake voice, causing Jeff to cross his arms. Chris told them all, "Well, I reviewed everything. Ryan tried to define what a great leader is, while Stefani... promised pineapples to everyone. Ryan gave examples of what a leader shouldn't be, while Stefani... said everyone should get pineapples. I think the third person to make up the Final Three is quite obvious:

...Stefani, of course!" Chris said, after a long pause. "What!?" Jeff and Katherine uttered happily. "You're kidding," Ryan laughed. "Of course he's kidding. A joke on me, right? Like I'm not used to it!" Chris shook his head, "Nope, Stefani wins! You're going bye-bye!" "What?? NO! There is no way that shrimp puff did a better job than me!! I spoke about what a great leader is!" Ryan replied. "Yeah, but she said everyone gets pineapples! She's trying to make sure we stay happy and healthy! Plus, Ryan, everything you said was about what a good leader shouldn't be. You didn't even say what you were, so you kinda eliminated yourself because I didn't have anything to judge. Sooooo, bye!!" "Would you have believed him if he did say how good of a leader he could be?" Jeff wondered. "Ehhh, no." Ryan gasped, "You know what!? You can all just go (bleep) yourselves! I don't need this show and I don't need any of you! I'm already going to be famous! Without this stupid matchbox show holding me back!!" Chris literally began pushing Ryan off of Gilded Glory property, "Yeah, yeah, that's what they all say. Let me know how that works out for you. Actually, don't, because I could care less! Haha!" "You'll all be working for me one day! Stop pushing me!!" Ryan yelled to everyone. Chris continued pushing Ryan, "Join us next time as the Final Three fight to seize the championship title as they battle... to the death!" The camera went back over to Jeff and Katherine, who gasped, and Stefani who was shown pushing her breasts together, not listening. Chris reassured everyone, "Ha, I'm just kidding, of course! Or am I?! You never know with me! But, you will know if you tune in next time on Total Drama 1-0-1!!" Chris finally finished pushing Ryan out of the area, "Out with ya! You lost at one of the caucuses!" As the screen faded to black, Ryan screamed in agony.

Chapter Twenty Four: Classhin' for Fashion
"Last time on Total Drama 1-0-1:" Chris began his introduction and recap of the last challenge with a smug look on his face, "The love of the nation was in the air... if that's even possible. I sent the schoolmates on the greatest thrill ride to hit them yet! Politics. But, before any of that could happen, maybe I should talk about Stefani in Jeff's bed, wearing nothing but his underwear! Wait, what? Did I just say that? Did that really come from the mouth of Chris McLean? Why, yes. It did. To this point, we still don't know how she made it in there and Stefani refuses to tell us because... 'she doesn't remember'. Katherine was the first to figure this out and was totally berserk the entire day! Anyway, tension got even thicker when Jeff and Katherine had to compete in the first challenge together: as Vice-Presidents to Stefani and Ryan, they were to get the word out to the public and have them vote for who they want to see as President. Needless to say, due to Jeff being distracted by Katherine's anger towards him and his own confusion as to why Stefani was in his bed last night, Katherine won the challenge. Now, Liberals vs. Conservatives? Democrats vs. Republicans? Nah, we didn't have any that! It was just Stefani against Ryan in the second challenge. I thought it was going to be boring--and I was right. I'm actually boring myself spilling what happened. I'm just gonna say that. Due to Stefani, technically winning the challenge and a surprise sudden-death elimination, our King of Mean, Ryan, was finally sent packing! With only three competitors left, it's literally anyone's game now on Total! Drama! 1-0-1!"

After the theme song ended, the camera faded into Jeff's room. Jeff was walking around in his room, getting ready for the day.

Jeff: (cheering and shouting) The Final Three!! I'm here! I'm finally here! Dudes, it's looking like there's a party in the future!

Jeff was in his closet, looking for a shirt to wear. His head was in the closet itself and all one could see was Jeff throwing dirty shirts out of his way to find a clean one. "Eugh, that's been used. Nope, no, no, nah," Jeff was saying as he sniffed his shirts and casually threw them on the floor. "Where's my good duds?"

Jeff: Of course I'm excited! I'm so close to all this money! It's gonna suck when I blow it all in 3 hours but I'm so close!! It's... it's... it's righteous! I haven't used that word in a while! (scratches head) Maybe there's a reason for that, it's kinda outdated.

"Is this one any good?" he asked himself, sniffing another shirt. "Ugh, no. We're in a huge mansion and there's a huge school near us... but the producers couldn't invest in a laundry room? Bogus." Jeff continued to rummage through his closet and found a crusty sandwich with one bite out of it in his search. "Hmm, nothing like a little energy to keep me going," Jeff said, eating the rest of the crusty sandwich whole. He realized this was a mistake, as a diseased look came up on his face. He immediately ran to the bathroom to vomit.

Jeff: With Ryan out of the picture, to be honest, I wouldn't mind if either of the other finalists win. I mean, one's my babe and the other is Stefani. I'm trying to forget about what happened last night, (shaking his head to the camera) so don't remind me. With Katherine still in it, even if she wins, I win. (smiles and holds fingers up) So, it looks like I have a 3/2 chance of winning, right!? Wait-- (confessional cuts off)

Jeff was seen to be back in the closet, "It's so easy to find pants or shorts, but where is a decent shirt?" Jeff continues to look and ends up finding one of Katherine's bra. He blushed, "Oh, heh. How'd that get in there?" He got it out of his way by tucking it in his pants so he could continue looking. "I wonder what the challenge is going to be today? Knowing that snake, Chris, it could be any-- Finally!" Jeff stopped yammering and found a clean shirt. He threw it on and ran out of his closet and out the door.

As he darted out of the living area, the camera stopped and zoomed in on Katherine's slightly open door. Katherine was shown trying to brush her teeth, fix her hair, and head-bang to an her own air guitar riff at the same time. Her speech was garbled as she was trying to sound like a guitar, causing her to almost swallow her toothbrush. "Aaaaaaaaaaaah!!" she began screaming as she choked on toothpaste and got her comb stuck in her hair.

Katherine: (looking a hot mess in the confessional) I've come so far! Can you believe I've made to the Final Three!? Me, in the Final Three!? (points thumbs to herself) This guy?! Well, really, I got eliminated! But! I was eliminated by most of my old team, who isn't here! So, vicariously, I eliminated them! (evil laughter) That makes sense, right?! (smiles to show massive amounts of toothpaste all around her teeth)

Katherine was then shown cleaning herself up, with her hair still looking very poorly groomed. She looked in the mirror and shrugged her shoulders, "Perfect!" She went back into her room and saw what a mess she left it. "Oh, man, this place is a Kat-sty," she uttered to herself, "Hey, mom! Can you clean my room!?" After yelling that, the room was silent for a few seconds. Then Katherine realized, "Oh, right, I'm in a competition. Riiiiiight.  Man, when I win, I'm investing in a butler for that party I'm having."

Katherine: (looking a bit better) Nervous? Of course not, have you seen my competition? Don't get me wrong, they're cool and I would trust them to bring me home after a long night, but I really think I have this in the bag. There's Stefani, the ever-changing maniac and Jeff, my babe that will do just about anything for me, including handing me the win if we're the Final Two! (laughs) I got this.

"Do I really want to clean this up?" Katherine wondered to herself. Right after she said that, she shrugged her shoulders again and proceeded to her door. She ran out, slamming the door behind her; however, her shirt got caught in the door hinge area of the door. After the slam, large thuds were heard right behind Katherine's door. "That can't be good," she murmured to herself. She tried opening her door in order to free her shirt, but to no avail. She pushed at the door, failing to do anything. The camera panned over to the inside of Katherine's room to show that a mountain of clothes had fallen in front of the door, due to the slam.

Katherine: A good thing about me is that when faced with danger or possible death, I take it head on and never worry about what could happen! So, Chris can throw whatever he wants at me for these next two challenges! Bring it! I'm not scared!

"I'm so scared!!!!" She began screaming, "A little help here!?!?!? Stefani? Jeff? Anyone?!" She continued trying to pull herself free.

The camera moved away from Katherine and approached Stefani's open-door room. Stefani was shown to have ear buds in her ears, listening to music and half-making up her bed in the process.

Stefani: (groans and yawns) I couldn't sleep at all last night... nor can I remember last night. I am so exhausted. (scratches back) I almost stayed in bed today. (moans) In fact...

Stefani looked at the bed she was making up as her eyes turned into hearts. She moaned, "Ehhh, they'll send for me. I want more sleep!" She destroyed the bed again and dove into it. Doing so, something slid out of her pants pocket. After she got comfortable in the bed, she pulled it out and saw that it was the balled-up pair of briefs she wore during the last challenge. Not remembering much, she shrieked and threw them on the other side of the room. "Eugh! How did those get in there!?" she groaned and rolled over. She threw up a middle finger to her ceiling, "Good night, again, world. From Stefani."

Stefani: (yawning) Yeah, I'm happy I made it this far. I'd probably be happier if I could keep my eyes open! (yawns again) It's time for the world to feel the wrath of... the-the wrath of... th-the wrath... (passes out on the desk)

Stefani was shown sleeping in her bed with her hand, which was originally holding up her middle finger, now on her face due to passing out. Nothing was heard from her, "..."

Stefani: (passed out) ...

The camera was still viewing Stefani asleep as TD101 producers were heard bickering and whispering in the background, off-screen. "What's she doing?" one whispered. "I think she's sleeping, sir." another replied. The two continued bickering. "Really? I didn't put that together! I meant why!" "I think it may be because she's tired, sir." "... Just get out, Hennyson. Get out." Footsteps were heard trailing off from the location as the first producer talked to two others. "Do you think we should wake her up? She's gonna miss the Fashion challenge." "It's her loss. It's not our problem, it's hers," was the reply. "Yeah, sir, he's right." the third one agreed. "You blockheads! Do you guys not have hearts?" "No," they both said. "That's why Chris hired us." "Oh, whatever," the first one said. He threw a teddy bear at Stefani in an attempt to wake her up. Stefani groaned some more, grabbed the bear and threw it off-screen with her eyes closed. It hit the first producer again. "Foolproof plan, sir," another producer whispered out. "Oh, li--" He was cut off by distant screaming and yelling going on outside the room, "Shhh! Shhh!" he said to the others.

"Can someone help me out here!?!?" Katherine yelled outside, "Please!!??" Stefani heard this and her face scrunched up in disgust as she tried to stay asleep. Katherine continued to yell outside.

Stefani: (still passed out) ...

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!" she screamed at about the top of her lungs. This caused Stefani to finally wake up; her eyes were blood red. She ran to her door, opened it and yelled at the screamer, "Hey! Could you keep it down! Some of us are trying to dream about a better world!" She, then, slammed her door and went back to bed. "Really?!?" Katherine looked at Stefani's closed door in awe, seeing that Stefani didn't help her. Katherine kept pulling at her shirt. "Oh, enough of this!" She pulled even harder and was finally set free, ripping the left side of her shirt off. She groaned, "Ughhh! My shirt!" Then, she began smiling, "Oh, well, time to turn this negative into a positive. I can rock this look." She casually began walking towards Gilded Glory.

Katherine walked out of the mansion to find three notes on the ground, all of which said the same thing. She read one aloud: "Final Three. Get your keisters out in front of the school. It's time for your possibly-final-challenge. Uh, what? 'Keisters'? Is that still a word?" Confused, Katherine walked a little further to meet Chris and Jeff. It was shown that Chris was standing in front of three trashcans. Jeff turned around, "Baby!!" Katherine ran to him and hugged him, "Heyyy!!" "You look... nice," Jeff awkwardly said, noticing Katherine's entire left side of her shirt was missing. Katherine snootily walked towards Chris and said to Jeff, "Make it as awkward as you want, you know I look fabulous in this new retro chic."

Jeff: Since when did she turn into a fashion diva?

"So glad you can join us, Katherine!" Chris sarcastically shouted to her. "Yeah, thanks," she brushed Chris off. Chris noticed Katherine's 'new look', "And it seems you're trying to get a head start on today's challenge, judging by your ripped-out shirt." "Huh?" "All will be explained... as soon as Stefani gets here." Katherine looked confused, "Stefani? Oh, right. She's still in bed." Chris stared blankly, "What!?" At that point, his cellphone rang He seemed to be talking to a producer of Total Drama 101, "Hello? Yes.  No, I was just told.  By Katherine, does it matter?  Oh.  Oh, I see.  Well-- No.  No, dude.  Wel-We-Well, did you throw the teddy bear at her?!  Uh-huh.  Still!?  Well, get her up and down here!" He hung the cellphone up, "Can't rely on anyone." Jeff and Katherine looked confused as they exchanged looks. Chris walked back over to them, "That was my stupid crew. They're getting Stefani down here. Once she's here, we can-- Oh, wow. There she is!"

At that moment, Stefani was pushed on-screen by an off-screen worker. "Hey, watch it! I'm 'yawned' and dangerous!" Stefani shook her fist weakly. "Welcome, Stefani! Now we can get started!" Chris shouted out. "Whatever," Stefani impishly said. Afterwards, she sat down with her legs crossed and angled and buried her head in her hands. Chris peered down to her, "Eh, I'm sure she's still awake, she'll hear it! She better, if she wants to stay in this game!" He dove between Jeff and Katherine, "Congratulations on making it to the Final Three of Total! Drama! 1-0-1!" In his fake excitement, he accidentally punched both of them. "Oww!" Katherine exclaimed. "Watch it, man," Jeff told him. Chris ignored both of them, "You've almost reached the end of this endless, pathetic, drama-filled stag of a game! There's only a couple more challenges in your way!  One of them is the one I have for you all today!  As a gift, I decided to have this one outside so you won't be cramped up in a room--you're welcome!" Jeff and Katherine both rolled their eyes as Stefani was heard snoring. Jeff wondered, "Bro, should you wake her up?" Katherine looked at Chris, who stopped his monologue. Chris shrugged, "She'll catch on! Anyway, today's challenge subject is fashion design.  Fashion Design!  Whether we knew it or not, fashion design dates all the way back to the beginning of time when cavemen thought wearing loincloths and rocks was the sexiest thing a person could do!" "What's a loincloth?" Jeff asked, scratching his head yet again. Katherine giggled and whispered in his ear. As she whispered, Jeff's mouth opened. "Ohhhhhhhhhhh, that." "Yep." "So, it's that thing that you have and in your closet--" "Uh-huh," Katherine cut him off, trying to get him to stop talking, to no avail, however. "--in your closet and you asked if I--" "Yes, Jeff." "--if I wanted to see you in--" "YES, THAT, JEFF. NOW STOP YOUR YAMMERING," she yelled. "That is a loincloth!"

Katherine: (blushing) What!? (looks into the camera) You should expect this from me now. You know so much more than some of my friends know! (thinks to herself out loud) Well, actually, once this airs, they'll know everything, too. Oh, whatever! You should already expect these things! I live for fun!

"Okaaaaaaaaay, then," Chris said, confused. "If I can continue: this will probably be the most dramatic, difficult, thought-consuming challenge yet!! Listen carefully.  You will not be determining if you make it into the Final Two, individually.  It will be left up to your other two competitors!" Jeff gasped, Katherine put her hands on her mouth, and Stefani continued snoring. "What do you mean by that?" Katherine wondered. Chris smiled, "I'm glad you asked, Jeff!" "I'm Katherine. "Stefani," Chris' smile grew. "Anyway, each of you are now owners of one of those three trashcans. Needless to say, trashcans are gross, but these have been disinfected by our crackpot team of crackerjack producers! In the cans are different types of clothing and human accessories. Your task is to make an appealing outfit out of whatever you find out of those cans! You can only dig out of one can. Afterwards, we will make sure that you three will be wearing the three outfits made. The two people wearing the two best-thought-out outfits will be receiving a ticket to our first ever Total Drama 1-0-1 Finale! The loser will be wishing they just got 20th place... because that's definitely what they're going to feel like! Oh, yeah! It's another sudden elimination!" Jeff grinned, "Oh, I was so scared of today. That doesn't seem too bad, man." As Jeff said this, Katherine cocked an eyebrow.

Katherine: I already have bad trust issues. You think I'm really going to trust someone that has tortured us for weeks for his own greed? Something's definitely up.

Katherine raised her hand, "Chris? What were you saying earlier about the Final Two being left up to other people? I don't get it." "All will be explained in due time," Chris repeated himself. "Hmmmm," Katherine mumbled to herself. She and Jeff immediately began diving through two of the trashcans. "Anyway!" Chris threw a rock at Stefani, which woke her up. Angered, she shouted, "WHAT!?" "You have a challenge to get to!" Chris shouted at her and then ran off-screen. Yawning, Stefani got up, stretched out her limbs, and walked, hump-back, towards Jeff and Katherine, "Whatever."

Chris: (reviewing papers in the confessional) HOW did she get picked for this show! I can't even find her contract! (continues rattling through papers)

Stefani saw Jeff holding up a tattered tuxedo and Katherine looking at 4 bows. "What are we doing?" she asked, smacking her lips. Jeff filled her in, "We need to look through these trashcans and find clothes and other duds and stuff to make an outfit in. Chris says the two people wearing best-thought-out dreads wins and goes to the Final Two and the other girl-- uhh, person is eliminated.  It's really tough and very sudden.  So, good luck. Did you get all that, Stef?  Stef?" Jeff looked behind him to see that Stefani turned her trashcan into a pillow and began snoozing again. "Ugh, I hate when that happens," Jeff grumbled. "What, babe?" Katherine said, holding some pants. "When I waste my breath like that. If I'm talking, that means it's pretty important, dude, considering I don't say much... or at least I didn't until this competition." "Don't let it get to you, it's okay," Katherine reassured him with a kiss. Jeff smiled and continued looking through his can, "Thanks, Kat."

Jeff: That Katherine. We make the perfect couple: we love each other, we're party people, we vibe out and never have problems, and best of all, we're there for each other. It's perfect. (makes a heart out of his fingers)

Katherine went back over to her can and picked up a watch, "Oooh, I wonder what time it is." Jeff laughed, "Are you really going to use that to tell time?" Katherine squinted and saw that both hands were on the 4 of the watch. "Well, it says it's 4:20. Does that mean anything?" "Nothing that I can tell," Jeff replied. "It could be my good luck charm!" Katherine stuck the watch in her pocket and kept it for the end of her outfit. Jeff threw his body into his can and found some decent looking pants. "Hey, check these out," he said to himself. He looked at the pants and then looked at the pair he was wearing and a confused look approached his face.

Jeff: Dudes, personal question. Is it bad that pants you find in a trash can look better than the ones you're wearing?

"Will you excuse me for a moment?" Jeff said to Katherine and Stefani. Jeff darted off-screen, two zipping noises were heard, and he was back in a flash wearing the pants he found and carrying the pants he owns. Katherine looked at him for a split-second then turned back around and stared at him, noticing a change. "Jeff?" "Yeah?" "Did you... just get a haircut?" she asked, confused. Jeff gave her a look. "Suuuuuuuuure," he lied to her. Katherine, then, rubbed her eyes with her hands and continued grabbing things out of her can. "Oh, while you were gone, I found this! It spoke to me--No. It yelled at me." Katherine held up a light pink shirt. The shirt had light blue text in caps reading 'I LOVE YOU LIKE I LOVE A PARTY. AND THIS GIRL <3 PARTIES.' "That's definitely you, heh," Jeff agreed with the shirt. He, then, looked over at Stefani. "Kat, what do you think she's gonna do?" Jeff said, pointing to Stefani. Katherine's head was in her trash can. She came out with bracelets on her head. "Who, Stefani? Either she's going to sleep and lose the challenge, wake up to participate and lose the challenge, or just plain lose the challenge. Notice a pattern?" Katherine smugly said to Jeff, laughing. "The Final Two is looking pretty sweet right now. But... it's gonna be hard going against you. Ooh!  Look, a tie! This can help me out." Jeff found a white and black striped tie. Fascinated with it, he tied it around the upper part of his head and continued looking.

Time passed and Jeff and Katherine continued picking things out of their cans and, at that point, Chris came back into the picture. "I hope you have everything ready! It's time for the final judging of the season! You know, except for the Finale!" Chris stated. He saw that Jeff and Katherine had plenty of clothes and accessories in their hands and arms. He, then, looked at Stefani, who seemed to be spooning with her trashcan. "Did you guys really let her sleep through this whole challenge?" Chris giggled. "Hey, her loss is our gain," Jeff answered. "Plus, I really don't get how she got this far anyway, man." Chris laughed, "All true, all true. This should be interesting. Alright, it's time to judge!"

Chris walked over to Jeff, who laid all of what he chose out. Jeff picked out a black headband with the TD101 logo in the center, a white V-Neck with black flames on the bottom of the shirt, a black and white-striped tie, the dark-blue jeans he was originally wearing, and one black-suede shoe. Chris looked down at the shoe, "Only one?" "It was the only shoe I could find!" Jeff said. "Uh-huhhhhh," Chris took out a notepad and wrote a few things down.

Jeff: It's always me that he takes notes over! Why!? (smacks forehead)

Jeff continued, "I really didn't know exactly if the outfit was supposed to be for you or not, soooo I tried to do a unisex thing. So, I went with an emo look!" Katherine mumbled under her breath, "Then, if it's for Chris, it's perfect..." "What was that, Katherine?" Chris wondered after viewing Jeff's clothes. "Hmm? Oh, nothing!" "Uh-huh. Well, he could have went with the desperate look, too! Would have been great on you!" Chris retaliated. "Hey!!" "Great job, Jeff! Now, let me go look at your girlfriend's." "Sir, yes, sir!" Jeff told him. Chris walked over to Katherine's outfit. Katherine seemed to have chosen two light pink bows, a watch, the light pink shirt from earlier, holed Capris, and pink and white sandals. "I decided to go with the look that says 'Hey! 'Ey!! I don't care! I love it!'," Katherine explained to Chris. This caused Chris to laugh again. "Oh, this is really gonna be interesting. Good job, Katherine, good job," Chris said, scribbling things on the same notepad. As Chris walked away, Katherine scowled.

Katherine: Hmph. I shouldn't have said Chris would look good in Jeff's stuff. He knows he would look drop-dead sexy in the stuff I picked out!! (smiles and pulls out a pink tile swatch) Pink is definitely his color!

Chris went over to a sleeping Stefani. He kicked her a bit, "Stefani? What do you have to show?" Stefani grumbled and growled; she finally got up from her trashcan, reached in it and threw a scarf at Chris. "Take that, live, and prosper," she whispered to him as she threw her head back on the trashcan. Katherine wondered, "Could she be more useless today?" Chris finished tabulating his notes and came to a conclusion, "Alright! 2 lovely scrap-outfits and a scarf. How fitting.  Well, I've seen some great stuff today!  Now it's time to throw some overalls and bellbottoms in our pot of modern-clothing gumbo." "What are you talking about!? Bellbottoms rock!" Katherine yelled out, breaking out in a disco dance. "Calm yourself, Katherine," Chris continued. "Now, I need for Jeff to give his entry to Stefani, who will give her entry to Katherine, who will give her entry to Jeff! After that, I need you all to put the clothes you have on!" "Wh-why?" Jeff wondered. "You'll find out," Chris winked at Jeff. Jeff threw his outfit at Stefani's face. The outfit was covering her nose, which almost suffocated her, causing her to wake up. "Ahhhhhhhhh!!!" she screamed and jerked up. Chris was in possession of Stefani's scarf and he, willingly gave it over to Katherine, who happily gave her outfit to Jeff. "I bet you'll look good in that pink," Katherine seductively said to Jeff, who was looking uncomfortable. "Thaaaanks, I'll bet you look good in that... scarf," Jeff stammered, causing Katherine to question how she really will look in the scarf. The Final Three, then, donned the clothing they had and awaited Chris' further instructions. "Elimination tiiiiiiime!" Chris told them, causing Jeff and Katherine to get scared, as they began to remember the challenge details. Stefani seemed to care less. Chris asked them all, "Does anyone remember me talking about how your other two competitors would be determining if you make it to the Final Two? I think it was Katherine that asked about it... well, I'm answering you." Katherine's eyes widened, "Chris, you can't be serious." "Oh, but I am! The challenge winners would be determined by the two people in the best-thought-out clothing! I didn't say anything to you about switching clothes! But, to be honest, I tried to make it obvious. At least Stefani caught it, because due to her poor effort in trying in the challenge, our Final Two are the two people wearing the best-thought-out outfits...... Jeff and Stefani!!!"

Stefani: (sleeping in the confessional) ...

"What!?!?! NO!" Jeff and Katherine both yelled at Chris. Katherine's eyes turned into flames as she grabbed a sleepy Stefani, "You! Wh-wh-why didn't you try in the challenge?! What's wrong with you?!" Stefani looked at Katherine with half-open eyes, "Whaaaa? Oh. Yeah. I need to get my ears checked, but I think you just got eliminated." Katherine shook her a bit, "What!? Do you even care that you did this!? On accident?!" "Yeah, well you see... if I wasn't so frickin '  tired, I probably would care soooooo much more. But, hey what are you gonna do?" Stefani responded. Katherine gasped, let go of her, and tried to assault her, but she was held back by Jeff, "What?! What did you say?! No! NO! Lemme at her! Lemme at her! There will be blood!!"

Chris was seen laughing at the entire scene. Jeff restrained her, "Katherine, no! No! Listen to me! I can do this! This just made things 100x easier! I can do it! I will win it for both of us!!" Katherine was fighting back tears, "It's just not fair!!" "You know what else isn't fair?" Chris intervened. "Life! And the amount of time we get for this show! You're outta here! Again!!" Chris picked Katherine up and began carrying her off the premises. Katherine yelled, "Jeff! You can do it! You can win! I know you can, I'll be rooting for you! I... I love youuuuuu!!!" Also fighting back tears, Jeff responded, "I love you, too, babe! I've got this!" He looked over to Stefani, who seemed to be knocked out again. "Really, dude?!"

Chris finished with Katherine and ran back over to Jeff and Stefani, "Jeff! Sleepy!! Err, uhhh, 'Stefani'!! Our official final two! One of you will become rich beyond your wildest dreams! And the other will be ridiculed for the rest of his, her, or its life!" "It?" Jeff asked. "Just roll with it," Chris told him. He kneeled down so the camera can have both Jeff and Stefani in the shot. "The Finale is at our footsteps! Or, in Stefani's case, in her dreams! We're going to have a royal battle of the wits between these two competitors! Join us for next time for our exciting conclusion of Total! Drama! 1-0-1!" As the camera faded, Stefani's snoring shook the camera's view.

Chapter Twenty Five: 101 Rundown
Flashbacks will be considered all text in red . Chris was shown to be riding in a sleek, white jet. In the main area of the jet, there were no chairs or seats, only a large table in the middle of the jet. Chris was shown, face down, getting a massage from a few females. "This, this right here," Chris stated. "This is the life. A little more on left, Hildegard. Little more, li-little mo--Ahhhhhhhhhhh, yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." Sounds of relief bellowed out of Chris as a cameraman in the jet threw a rock at Chris' head. Chris panicked and his head shot up, "Ow! What, what!?" He noticed the cameras and gasped, "Oh, no, haha, no. No, no, no. I'm on vacation! You must be joking. You have to be." At that point, someone off-screen handed a paper to Chris. He groaned, snatched it, and read it aloud, "Chris, sorry to interrupt your time off, but we need to reschedule your vacation time as we bypassed the recap episode of Total Drama 101. We apologize for the inconvenience but it needs to happen now since the finale is near. Don't forget, we own you. Regards, Your Boss. You don't need my name." Chris groaned and crumpled up the paper. "And, we're on air right now," a cameraman whispered to Chris. Chris gasped, "Right now!?" The camera screen went up and down, as the cameraman nodded his head. "Hello, faithful fans!" Chris tried to play things off. "Welcome back to Total! Drama! 1--" a cracking noise was heard in the background. "Ooooh, Hildegard, you're bending it." The same noise was heard again.

"Excuse my looks," Chris said to the camera. "This was supposed to be my time off, but... it looks like that's not happening. The T.V. life can do that to you. Anyway, the show must go on! In this quick episode, we'll be recapping you on all the events that have happened thus far! Right here! Right now! On Total... Drama-- Wait. This episode needs a snazzier title." He looked up and was struck with an idea, "Ha! Check it all out right now! Right here! On the 1-0-1 Rundown!! Best name ever."

After the theme song, Chris was shown to be fully clothed in his airplane wear and operating the jet in the cockpit. He manipulated the PA System and spoke out loud to a nearly empty jet, "This is your captain, Chris McLean, speaking over the events that have happened in this drama-filled season of Totality. Also known as Total Drama. Heh, I probably could have said that better. Oh, well. Today, we'll be recapping you on everything that's happened on Total Drama 101! Here's how it started. 20 bogus, fame-mongering teenagers were all forced--er, I mean, voluntarily signed up--for summer school, basically! I mean, seriously, who would sign up to go through school again!? I guess some people will do anything for fame and fortune. In the first episode, these contestants were introduced to everything: the fa-boo living conditions, the gross food, the life-threatening challenges, and more importantly, each other! Haha! I could tell this season was going to be great! We had it all: the nerds, the pretty girls, the pretty boys, the idiots, the followers, the leaders, the manipulators, and whatever you want to consider Stefani to be. Personally, I would just say 'all of the above and more'. Anyway, each of the days ran the same as they normally did in the last three seasons. You get a challenge, you either win or lose. Winners get invincibility, losers send one of their own home. And, man, did we have some... interesting eliminations."

Chris put the PA System down and continued to fly the jet, "I wish this thing could go faster. What would it look like if the host is late for the finale!?" He put the jet into an overdrive mode and flashed a Hall Pass in front of the camera, "Another thing these new contestants were told about that the ancient ones didn't get to fight over was this! This is a Hall Pass. Every day, a challenge winner becomes known but one had the opportunity for their own safety by claiming this Hall Pass! The Hall Pass appeared in many locations and secures you a spot in the next episode as long as you kept up with it! Anyway, on with the recap..." "We have randomly selected one person from each team to complete this obstacle course. They will each run outside 20 yards to the first checkpoint, which is 50 jumping jacks; run back inside to complete the monkey bar portion of the challenge; dive onto the ground to crawl under these ropes and barbed wires; then, finally, run 20 yards again back to the starting line. The winner of this challenge gets invincibility for their team, losing team gets to go vote someone off in our first ever Detention Hall (also called "D-Hall") Ceremony!! Let's see... For the Screaming Pencils, we have... Brandon!" "What?! Me?! I don't concur with that statement," Brandon blurted out, scared. "And, for the Killer Pens, we have.... Liz!" Chris continued. "Booyah, baby!!" Liz shouted, "I'll dominate at this." "Our first challenge was Gym. I like to consider this the joke challenge because... powerhouse athlete Liz straight owned poor Brandon within seconds and, after being sent to our first ever Detention Hall Ceremony, Brandon was expelled. Tough break." Chris dropped the fatal Hall Pass, Ryan looked up, jumped up similar to a ninja, and grabbed the hall pass, crashing onto the floor and tumbling into the Screaming Pencils' territory. While Ryan was tumbling, he hit Tammi, knocking her gun out of her hands. "Yes! This game is ours!" Gretel said from the sidelines. "Look out, dude!" Jeff said to Tammi. Tammi stayed there, cowering in fear. Ryan looked at his gun, then to his other hand with the Hall Pass clutched in it, then to Nalyd, who was looking back at Ryan. Ryan stupidly aimed his gun at Nalyd, "Bye-bye!" he chimed. Nalyd, seeing that he was about to get attacked by his own teammate, grabbed his gun, aimed at Ryan and shot him at him right when he shot at Nalyd. Both were hit. The sideline viewers looked in awe over what had just happened. Chris began laughing, "This guy! I love this guy so much! He's a waste of space but he made this competition great and made me look fabulous as the host. Like Heather, Ryan quickly made an impression on the rest of the teammates. His ruthlessness drove him and he didn't care what got in the way. During the History challenge, contestants were to eliminate each other in a classic game of war. Before this, Ryan tried to make an alliance with two other members of his team: Samantha, the crazy bottle-rocket and Terry the wannabe ladies' man. Problem-o numero uno: Nalyd. Nalyd tried doing this as well. Much to Ryan's hatred, they immediately started a life of misery for themselves and everyone around them. Eventually, they agreed to lead the alliance jointly, making four people. But, remember, it's Ryan! He still seemed to hate Nalyd and, after making sure he was safe with the Hall Pass, he let loose on Nalyd... personally. To save himself, he managed to get his alliance to vote out Chuck for sleeping through the past two challenges. Bed's that way, man! Ahh, what's next?" "Gretel, Liz," this is the final A+ of the evening. The camera zooms in on Gretel & Liz respectively. "And, it goes to...................................... Gretel!!!" Chris through Gretel her Golden A+, but Gretel, putting her head down, sneezed and got hit in the head with the A+. Liz got up from her seat. "Sorry, Liz," Chris started. "But, you seemed to be a threat to Nalyd & Ryan, so Ryan gotcha good." "Yeah, remember Liz?" Chris rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah, turns out she didn't last too long. After their second loss in a row, Ryan and Nalyd's alliance grew stronger as they picked off Liz for being a threat. Only thing I didn't like about this was that she didn't even do anything... but she seemed cool about it, so I didn't care! Obviously, Ryan didn't either." "Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do." Ryan responded to Chris. The team (excluding Nalyd & Ryan's alliance) stared Ryan down. "What?!" he scolded. "Yeah, he really didn't care at all!" Chris put the jet on autopilot and got up from his seat to rummage through the kitchen area. "Next up!" "After you finish breaky," he began, "you are to report to Room 104, one of our Mathematic classrooms! See ya there, and be prepared for a wonderful challenge filled with twists and turns!" "Great." Nalyd said, blandly. Chris slammed a refrigerator door after getting a drink, "Oh, math! I remember that one. Tension was high, Ryan and Nalyd were already looking like powerhouses. But, enough of the Killer Pens. Let's look at the other team: the Screaming Pencils. After Brandon's elimination, the Screaming Pencis were made up of caregiver Alyssa, crazy Katherine, rich kid Carter, random Zach, knockoff Lilie, annoying Ariel, controlling Tammi, immature Webby, and one of our finalists, laid-back Jeff. You think the Pens had problems? It was just as bad on the opposite side. I mean seriously, Zach & Carter had a few miffs, Ariel basically irritated everyone, and Tammi couldn't deal with Webby and was sure he hadn't began to develop yet." Chris walked back over to the cockpit and sipped on his drink some more, "Ahh, anyway, the math challenge. The Screaming Pencils actually won on a technicality! I sent the remaining schoolmates on a maze and told them that the number one rule was to stick together! And, what do you think happened? A certain contestant by the name of Gretel separated herself from the Killer Pens and cost them the win! Poor little geek. I hear the geek race typically cry and eat ice cream from depression after something saddening like losing a gameshow happens. Or is that women? I'm not too sure." Ryan: Removing more of the deadweight, pound by pound. (evil chuckle) Chris was shown laughing, "I love it all! The treachery, the skill, the drama! Anyway, up next was one of my favorites: Television Broadcasting. But not because of the challenge, because of this: "MOUSE!!! Mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, MOUSE!!!" Tammi shrieked. "What's the problem?!" Katherine asked, stupidly.

Katherine: (stares into the confessional camera with a blank look on her face) Now, why did I ask that? (smacks forehead)

"Gee, I don't know, Katy. I'm just over here looking like an idiot screaming over a mouse! Perhaps, there's a dinosaur loose in my room!" Tammi struck back. "Touch-y." Alyssa replied as she walked in. Tammi eyed Alyssa intently, and began thinking while she was in the chair. At that point, an evil grin came up upon her face. At that moment, Jeff took it upon himself to enter the room and grab the mouse. "Hey, there... Little Dude," Jeff said, slowly, "heh, what's up?" Chris stared into the camera, "Now remember that scene: The challenge this time was TV Broadcasting. A few contestants from each team were chosen to complete a full news broadcast; best one wins. Oh, before I go any further, I wanted to see if you remembered this, also. This is when some of the contestants found out which job they had in the challenge: Terry: I chose gossip reporter for our team. I really don't know why, I'm not that funny, but no one else signed up for it, so I did! Maybe this will impress Ryan. (smiles) Tammi: I'm going to be the team's gossip reporter and, mannnnnnn, do I have some dirt on some people, already! (pulls out a sheet of paper) It's go time, baby! Ariel: I gotta say, I'm really jazzed to be the weatherman for out team. And look who I'm going up against.... Stefani! I'm sure she's still loopy from last week. This should be fun and easy. (smiles) Stefani: (looks around in confessional then looks up) Oooooooh! Twinkly light-bulb!! (she touches it, causing her finger to get burned) Owww!!! Bulby hot!! (frowns) Katherine: I'm going to be co-news anchor with Lilie. Hmm... you know, I really don't like the prefix "co", it sounds a lot like (bleep). (gets close to the camera where the viewer can only see Katherine's face, gangster voice) And, don't you even think about callin' me a (bleep)! You gon' be pickin' up yo' glasses over there by the corner after I'm through wit'chu! And-- (confessional cuts off) Chris had a blank expression on his face, "Yeahhhh, this is the craziness that I had to deal with for weeks, everyone. Weeks. The girls were definitely more three-dimensional than the guys were. And, well, Ariel was just Ariel. Nobody could fully identify what he was. Anyway, before the Screaming Pencils could even give their broadcast, their camera became obsolete as Carter bumped into Zach, who crashed into said camera... which caused another installment of the Carter & Zach show as they both jumped down each others' throats. Needless to say, the Killer Pens won that episode. In my opinion, the end of the challenge triggered another strong opponent in Total Drama history: Tammi: It's time to get rid of a "pest" of my own. (takes out her cell phone, but the confessional cuts off) Chris gave a thumbs up to the camera, "That is Tammi. She was basically the main drive within the Screaming Pencils team like Nalyd and Ryan on the other team. She was definitely a perfectionist that expected nothing but the best from the people she comes in contact with. Some may describe her as a witch, others may not. I personally think she's just great for ratings. Remember that scene I told you about earlier? About the mouse? Well, after the Screaming Pencils' camera mishap, when Carter or Zach was supposed to get the boot, Tammi took it upon herself to eliminate Alyssa! Some hard-core grudge action! With the help of the developing Jeff and Katherine, Tammi ousted her and began her own rise to the top. Hmm? What's next? Singing challenge, Nalyd gets eliminated, blah, blah, blah. Lunch challenge, bye-bye, Dedrek, blah, blah, blah. Ha, I remember that challenge. I actually got them to accept Lunch as a challenge." Chris took another sip out of his drink and then spit it out, "Augh!! What have I been drinking?!" He looked at the drink to notice it was a can of expired, apple juice concentrate. He threw it out a window of the jet. Below, it was shown that the can hit a defenseless child on a bicycle and knocked him out.

"Anyway," Chris continued. "You'll find that I have some random hatred for some of the contestants. Some of these eliminations, I really didn't even care about. Next is the Choir challenge. And don't come complaining at me, those arts geeks will break down my doors: apparently there is a difference in the school subject of 'Music' and the school subject of 'Chorus' which is why we got both as challenges. Now, the Chorus challenge was similar to the Singing challenge that eliminated Nalyd, basically best song wins. It wasn't really even the challenge that decided the two people eliminated this go around. Yes, I did say two. But, again, it's not my place to care, this is where we said goodbye to Lilie and Carter."

Chris' eyes widened, "Oh! Relationships! There's something we hadn't talked about yet! Those were developing somehow between these 20 losers. I mean, we had the obvious: Jeff & Katherine, the two lives of the party that don't care about much. But, we also had some weird hook ups. After Alyssa's elimination, we found out that Zach had developed some type of crush on her... and, well, since it's Zach, I'm sure that won't be going anywhere. One that I'm curious about is the one between Nalyd and... and... and Tammi." A record scratch was heard off-screen. "Yeah, that's what I thought, too, dude! Tammi's admitting of interest to Nalyd shocked some, left others confused, and gave others that prideful feeling of 'I told you so!'. Anyway, you guys remember this?!" Chris set himself up for another cutaway. "Tammi, Katherine, this is the final A+ of the evening," Chris said. The camera looked over to a confident Tammi and a less-than confident Katherine. "And, it goes to.............................. Tammi!!!" Tammi caught the Golden A+, then smiled at Katherine, mockingly. "What!? The almighty Katherine? Eliminated!?" Chris nodded his head, "Of course! In the Chemistry challenge, contestants had to choose one from each team to concoct the biggest. Explosion. EVER! Katherine more-than-willingly offered to go for the Screaming Pencils and Samantha was crazily chosen for the Killer Pens. Katherine's conceitedness got in the way of her judgement and, well, led to her downfall in this competition. Weird, I thought it would be all the jokes about partying that would kill her off. After the Chemistry challenge, the drama fueled even more when we went to Home Economics. Teams were required to make dishes to fuel the best appetite in the world. Alliances grew, relationships developed and improved, and Johnathan found himself getting the short straw when Jeff put it in overdrive and prepared a heavenly feast for the Screaming Pencils team. Clumsiness may be cute to some people but for Johnathan, it cost him $1,000,000! Here we go!" (Chef's entrance start) Chef: (marching) I don't know what I've been told!! Voices from the Boxes: (being rolled in) I don't know what I've been told!! Chef: 3 contestants, back to the show! Voices: 3 contestants, back to the show! Chef: (taking one of the Boxes off to show Lilie) Sound off! Lilie: I'm back! Chef: (taking the second Box off, showing Dedrek) Sound off! Dedrek: Me, too! Chef, Lilie, and Dedrek: Sound off, "I'm back, me too". (takes third box off to reveal Nalyd) Lilie, Dedrek, and Nalyd: (all together) We're back!! (Chef's entrance end) Chris continued piloting the plane, "Alright, let me bring you up to speed. The Final Nine thought they were the Final Nine until it was immediately changed back into the Final Twelve! Haha! Also, during this time, the merge hit! Yes, sir! After this, it was officially every man, woman, and Ryan for him or herself! For nothing but the drama, we brought Dedrek back to torment what was left of the used-to-be Killer Pens. Lilie made a return after the hate mail I received for her previous elimination and to plot her revenge on Webby for getting rid of her in the first place! And, finally, what's-his-face returned because, let's face it, the Nalyd-Ryan power hour should have never got cancelled! After the R.O.T.C. challenge, R.O.T.C. prep man, Zach, easily defeated everyone and won the first individual challenge. Now, you may be wondering what's going on, strategy-wise. Well, Tammi, feeling powerless with one of her cohorts finally winning a challenge, actually asked to team up with Ryan's alliance. Tammi's alliance consisted of herself, Ariel, and Zach at this point. Ryan's consisted of himself, Terry, Samantha, and Nalyd once more. In the grand scheme of things, it was revealed that Webby was eliminated courtesy of newfound threat, Lilie and her desire of revenge from earlier. Talk about a letdown... a funny, well-deserved letdown. Lilie's rage continued next episode during the English challenge after she collected the most textbooks in our wild goose chase! This time, she was promised a spot in Tammi and Ryan's alliance in exchange for jointly voting out a possible powerhouse: Zach, the random quirk! Zach said goodbye to the competition as Ryan and Tammi grew stronger with many people in their arsenal!"

Chris was breathing heavily, "I've been talking for too long, it's about time to wrap this up soon! We shared some bonding time in the Parenting challenge up next! Tammi & Jeff, Samantha & Dedrek, Lilie & Ariel, Stefani & Terry, and... heh... Nalyd & Ryan were all paired and forced to take care of electronic children and the child with the best overall standing wins! Weirdly enough, our most unrealistic couple, Jeff & Tammi won it all while Samantha won a trip down into Loserville. Population: 11. Later, after a shocking twist of fate during the computer challenge, Katherine was brought back into the dish to play again! With the computer challenge, players were divided into three teams of three and were put to the ultimate video-game creation test! This episode introduced everyone to a relative of mine, Ace. He was such a fan favorite because he was always humiliating me!" Chris looked intently into the camera, "Well, who's the one making millions of dollars while the other just sits at home watching soap operas!? Think about that, Joker-- I mean, Ace!"

Chris, softened, continued his monologue, "Jeff and Stefani took this challenge as a bonding time and worked on their video game together while keeping Nalyd under the table in shame. Even while this was going on, Ryan was plotting nefariously of course. Due to a few batty, heh, twists in this episode, a double elimination saw two headaches out the door! Dedrek and Ariel! Both were framed by none other than Ryan as the perpetrator who knocked Ace unconscious with a bat while he went to look for a few things. It was too late for apologies and even proving the truth as Ryan ousted one of his own alliance members. You gotta admit, Ariel was coo-- He was awes-- He was good-loo-- HE WAS THERE! Due to legal matters with Tammi's elimination, we are unable to say nothing more than 'Tammi was eliminated in the Sexual Education course and should have been brought back to the--' Hey! I'm not reading that! Eliminations are fair and square, yo! For kicks and giggles, though, we can show you this scene. Here's what our finalists thought about the Sexual Education course. We went aaaaaaaaaall out:" Jeff: Uhm.... (yells) Still a kids' show, dudes! Katherine: Sex education? Really?  (scoffs)  I'm sure I've seen it all before.  (rolls eyes) This is gonna be boring. Lilie: This is not what a future businessperson should be learning about.  I probably already know this, anyway!  Ugh! Nalyd: (sweating) This is going to be sooooooo amazing. Ryan: (stares at the confessional camera with a cocked eyebrow) Really, people? Stefani: (singing, still semi-naked) ... And, IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-eee-IIIIIIIIIIIIII will always love youuuuuuuuuu-oooooh-oooh!! (falls out of chair) Tammi: As if Terry's mind wasn't demented enough, now we're putting sex into it. Terry: Whooooo!! Whoo!! Whoooooooooo!! Whoooooo!! Whoooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!! (hyperventilates) Chris was shown laughing crazily, "Naked Stefani has been another fan-favorite to the show. I've gotten tons of letters about her. Anyway, Terry was next to go when he lost, Lindsay-style, in our Driver's Education course! That day, coming in first place meant leaving in last place--but before he left, he did mention an undying love he had for our female finalist, Stefani. Terry wasn't that interesting to me and I'm sure the fanbase doesn't care about this. Take a look:" The Final Seven were then seen shown outside of Gilded Glory, watching Terry leave. "Well... It's not how I expected to leave. In fact, I didn't expect to leave," Terry said confidently. "Some people just don't know how to listen with their ears, bro," Chris said out to them all. Terry walked over to Stefani, "You've been pretty quiet today." "There's not much to say," she told him. "Oh." "Yeah." "Well, I hope you go far in the game." "Yeah, whatever." Terry quickly thought on his feet and looked into Stefani's eyes, "Have I done something to upset you?" "No?" "Well.... Okay, then," Terry grabbed Stefani and dipped her as if he were about to dance with her, "I can gaze into your deep, beautiful eyes for millenniums upon millenniums, but alas, I must leave. I don't care if you have this 'Jordan' fellow in your life, but I love you, your moods, and everything about you. The camera went into static and faded back into a whimpering Chris, "Okay, I lied! So many of you guys eat up Stefani and Terry, it's one of the hidden relationships that kept the show sane!" A record scratch was, again, heard off-distance as Chris continued in a stern voice, "Okay, enough of that. As you just saw in the flashback, Stefani had a boyfriend back home named Jordan and, get this, next episode in the economics challenge, she dumped him for the love-struck pre-eliminated nerd! Speaking of eliminations, you would think that Lilie, supreme ruler of everything perfection and finance would do wonders in a challenge involving collecting the most money, right? WRONG. After Ryan's getting rid of Tammi, Nalyd's sadness grew to such a high size, I was scared to talk to him; he was responsible for eliminating one of the biggest threats in the game for the second time! I wish he could have went further because, during the Art challenge, Ryan had enough of the Ryan-Nalyd bickering and finally found a way to rid him out of Total Drama 101: using Katherine and Stefani. In all honesty, Katherine not knowing about Nalyd's "plan" to get rid of Ryan in fact got rid of Nalyd instead because Katherine 'got tired of looking at Nalyd'. If that's not harsh, I don't know what i-- Oh, wait, yeah, I do! The next two eliminations!" "You're kidding," Ryan laughed. "Of course he's kidding. A joke on me, right? Like I'm not used to it!" Chris shook his head, "Nope, Stefani wins! You're going bye-bye!" "One of the few times I've actually felt bad about--" Chris tried to hold a serious face but then blurted out with laughter. "As if! I was so happy to see Ryan go! During the Politics challenge, Presidents Ryan and Stefani were grouped with their respective vice-presidents, Katherine and Jeff after the two had a huge falling out and almost ended their seemingly-perfect relationship. In the end, Stefani convinced me just a little bit more that she knew what a great leader was capable of. Ryan only explained to me what a leader was not. That was not the challenge! His elimination was a furious one as he went out, obviously kicking and screaming!"

Chris was coming into sight of Gilded Glory, landed the jet, and walked out as he finished, "And, finally, the challenge that ultimately broke up our power couple of the season. Due to Stefani's hysterical mood changes, Katherine was unlucky to get Stefani's indifference and sleepy mood, if that even is one. I told the Final Three at this point that the other two members of the Final Three will help in aiding you to the Final Two. Little did they know that I meant literally. Contestants were forced to make an outfit out of whatever I had laying around in trashcans from discards that me or my family didn't want. After outfits were made, the owners were swapped evenly and, the two people wearing the most thought-out outfits won. Stefani didn't give two crackers and ended up submitting barely anything, which cost Jeff his chance to be in the Final Two with his girlfriend! But, hey, think about it: how boring would that be?! It'd be a win-win! We're here! Hildegard, you and the others stay on board, we may be going somewhere else!"

"And, with that," Chris approached the front of Gilded Glory where Jeff and Stefani were standing with confidence. He continued, "We are somehow down to these two final competitors. Jeff, representing the males, the party dudes, the comics, and the Screaming Pencils against Stefani, representing the females... somehow, the anti-socials, the overbearing, the hyperactive, the somber people, the... everything! Who will be crowned our Total Drama 101 champion!? You can't miss the season finale of Total... Drama... 1-0-1! We're Pumped and Circumstantial! See ya there!" Chris put his arms around Jeff and Stefani, who smiled, as the camera faded to black.

Chapter Twenty Six: Pumped & Circumstantial
"Previously, on Total Drama 1-0-1:" Chris began his introduction as scenes from the past season flashed. "Yours truly was going to enjoy a vacay away from this tiresome job and these freak-show students. But, someone--who shall remain nameless... frankly, he doesn't deserve a name, he took my vacation away from me--told me that I couldn't relax and that TD101 needed to have a recap episode for some of our fans that do not quite remember everything this past season. It shouldn't be my responsibility to reiterate everything that happened this past season. With some of the people I've seen, remembering them actually was a pain in my left side." Chris was shown outside of Gilded Glory with Jeff and Stefani, the Final Two, "Anyway, we went over everything that has happened this season and caught up with this year's losers! Chris proceeded to name all of the eliminated contestants as Jeff and Stefani purposefully tried to avoid looking in the camera due to guilt, "Brandon, Chuck, Liz, Gretel, Alyssa, Nalyd, Dedrek, Carter, Lilie, Katherine, Johnathan, Webby, Zach, Samantha, Ariel, Dedrek again, Tammi, Terry, Lilie again, Nalyd... again, Ryan, and Katherine... AGAIN. After all of those rejects and eliminations, we have finally made it down to our Final Two. Jeff. And Stefani." Jeff and Stefani, then, both peered into the camera, smiled, and waved. "Who will be crowned the winner of Total Drama 101? Jeff? Stefani? Jeff? Stefani? JEFF? STEFANI? You better stay tuned to find out! On this exciting and shocking conclusion episode of Total! Drama! 1-0-1!"

After the theme song concluded, the camera faded in to see the scenic Gilded Glory, standing large and proud. Seconds later, Chris popped his head into the camera view, interrupting the tranquility, "It's here! It's here! It's finally here!" The camera followed Chris into the school as he continued his monologue, "Welcome, all, to the season finale of Total! Drama! 101! After so many weeks of scrumptious drama, shocking alliances, brutal eliminations, and many shots of my incredible body and face, we are nearing the end of this amazing season! We've shared many laughs, many tears--or, at least, the students have--, and lots of time with these 20 deadbeats and now... we are finally down to two. These two formidable competitors are Stefani and Jeff! They've caused laughs, broken hearts, and shattered alliances to get to where they are now! And now, they are about to fight to the death and beyond!!"

A book was then thrown from off-screen and hit Chris on the right side of his head, "Ow!!" He sighed, "Fine, since death battles are, quote, 'frowned upon, end quote, Total Drama will not be enforcing our two finalists to fight to the death..."

Chris: ... even though ratings would get higher than a mother--

"Anyway!" Chris continued, "We have given both Jeff and Stefani a few moments to reflect back on their journey on Total Drama 101 and air out any dirty laundry in our confessionals before they become the man and woman we hope to see them as after this exciting episode! Check it out!"

Jeff: (cheering) Yeah, baby! Final Two! I've made it all the way here! Who woulda thunk it, right!? (laughs) Overall, I think I had a great time. Wait, no, I KNOW I had a great time! Everyone rocked! You know... except Ryan. And Tammi. And... Nalyd. And... uhh... well, forget about them! Everyone was great! Hopefully, we all get to see each other again... so they can congratulate me on winning it BIG! Whoo!! Nobody will stand in my way. Stefani: Hey! Stefani here. Level-headed Stefani, that is. Uhhh... well, I can't say I'm not excited to still be here. It's really a shock to me. (rubs head) Things are really a blur as to why and how I'm still in this thing. (shows an envelope to the camera) I've been getting fan-mail from a lot of you guys saying you're cheering me on, but some of this stuff is kinda weird....

Jeff: I can't wait to see what Chris has in store. I've seen every season of Total Drama so far; the endings are always the best part! Stefani: ... Like this one, (reads) "Stefani! You're my favorite! I hope you win the whole thing! P.S. I loved you in the Horticulture episode, rock on!" We had a Horticulture challenge? What did I do that was so cool? I barely know what horticulture even means.

Jeff: Maybe it'll be a 10 mile hike up a mountain, or-or skydiving out of a burning plane! You could slap a school subject on either of those! Death Defiance, or something! Yeah, (sniffs) took that class in 8th Grade. (smiles in the camera) Stefani: Here's another one, this one is kind of hurtful, (reads) "Stefani, show some respect for us females and make sure you have clothes on at all times! Just because you learned about sexual education on the show doesn't mean you should be an example of it!" It also says on here that she's still rooting for me to win. I'm really going to have to rewatch some of this season when I get home. These people are scaring me. (laughter is heard off-screen; Stefani shouts to her left) How is this funny?!

Jeff: I gotta admit, I do miss a lot of my buds from the show. Like I said, hopefully they'll be here today. I mean, who would want to miss this?! Stefani: Terry, if you're watching, find me after the show! We need to talk... I've gotten a lot of mail about us and... yeah, that I do fully remember. (blushes) Ryan, Tammi, if you can see this... (short pause) ...IN YOUR FACE! As for everyone else, I do hope you'll cheer me on to winning. I'm still here, so I might as well win. I mean, Jeff is my only competition. How hard can that be?

Jeff: Chris? He's a fun guy, I don't see anything wrong with him. I mean, yeah, he threatened our lives on a daily basis, but that's his job! Heck, if I got paid to terrorize the lives of others, I'd see to it that one of them die for a bonus in the paycheck! Know what I'm sayin'? (looks off-screen) Ooh, can we scratch that? (looks blankly into the camera) Stefani: I would love to do this again. Just give us a different host. A non-life-threatening one. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against Chris, but... after messing with us for numerous weeks when most of it probably isn't necessary, I'm leaning on anti-Chris. Maybe a nicer host through the last half of the season would have gotten more "ratings" or whatever it is he blathers on about. Someone with the name of Kyle or Shawn... those sound like promising, honest-to-goodness people, right?

Jeff: Who do I miss the most? Gotta be my girl, Katherine. I mean, she's only been gone a day or so but--it feels like it's been decades, man. It's kinda heavy. Makes me think it may have been better if she didn't come back after that Chemistry episode. Don't get me wrong, she did awesome! I mean, she placed 3rd! But... you know, if she had been gone for a while, maybe I wouldn't be thinking about her as much so I can win for both of us. (taps finger on head) Then again, if she wasn't around, it would have hurt more. Gah, I dunno... Stefani: There's no set person that I miss the most. I do miss my team, Killer Pens. Hate that I had to vote you all out! But, if you're watching, I'm doing this for you guys! (winks at the camera while holding up a peace sign) You guys will see me soon! With a check for more money than you could ever... IMAGINE!

Jeff: This time... Stefani: ...I'm going all out. Jeff: And absolutely nobody... Stefani: ...will stand in my way! I'm going... Jeff: ...straight to the top with this.

Jeff & Stefani: (split-screen confessional) Bring it on.

"Fun stuff, right?" The camera went back and flashed on Chris, who was sitting outside of Gilded Glory at this point. He began rubbing the steps into the school, "Yeah, confession is always good for the soul... and for our viewers. They make for great television. You know what else makes for great television?! End-all finales that will determine who will win the most popular reality series on the tube! Here they come now!!" The camera panned upward to the doors of Gilded Glory, as they opened. Behind the right door stood Jeff; behind the left stood Stefani.

Jeff and Stefani gazed at the outside area of the school and saw many empty pull-out chairs, decorations along the ground and area, and a decked-out stage, front-and-center and complete with two podiums. "What's all this?" Stefani looked at Chris, baffled. Chris began humming to the tune of Pomp & Circumstance, "'What's all this? WHAT'S ALL THIS?' Why, you guys are graduating!!" Jeff gasped, "What?! We're graduating! Bu-but, but... I have to call my family! And my friends! I'm not prepared, dude!" "Slow your roll, Jeff, this isn't a real graduation." Chris chimed. He continued, as he walked Jeff and Stefani over to the two podiums. He continued, "We thought we would go out with a bang for 101 and give the finale a graduation theme! I mean, it's only fair, right? You guys have passed all the courses--now it's time for you both to become adults, find a deadbeat job, and join this pathetic run-down excuse of enjoyment that most people my age without my job call 'life'."

"I've always wondered how old you are, Chris," Stefani beamed. Jeff agreed, "I think we all do, dude." He looked over at Chris and smiled, "How old are you? It's only fair you tell us now! I mean, it's like you said! This is the finale of Total! Drama! 1-0-1!" "Okay, 1), that is MY line... my line. Don't ever steal that again from me. And 2), suuuuuure. I'll tell you my age. In fact, I'll turn it into a math problem. You guys won the math challenge right? Take the amount of times you've said 'dude' and multiply it by Ryan's shoe size, add Terry's number of hidden plushy dolls, subtract the amount of teeth Ariel has lost from tripping, and divide by 15. That's my age."

Jeff: (scribbling things on paper and scratching head) I didn't even know you could get that old! Holy cheese! I wonder if he'll turn to dust if I touch him...

Jeff stared blankly, looking confused as Chris went on to explain, "While Einstein is trying to crack the code to get that final 'A' in class, I hope he's listening to everything you two are about to do!" "'Everything'?" Stefani repeated. Chris nodded his head, "Yes, 'everything'. You guys will be competing in three circumstantial challenges today, scoring points as you go along. Now--" "Three!?" the finalists shrieked. "Yes... 'three'. Now, if I have to repeat myself once more, I'll see to it that the winner of Total Drama 101 is none other than me, Chris. McLean." Chris smiled seductively into the camera as Jeff and Stefani looked away. "Now, the challenges will get a bit harder as we go along--making the latter challenges worth more points to get! With every graduation ceremony, there are three things each co-valedictorian need to know or remember. One, you need to remember where your roots are--in this case, remember who was eliminated before you. Two, take some time to think about the worthless losers who didn't make it quite this far. And, three, know that graduation is a triumph, physically and mentally; you'll see what I mean in a bit. If you guys will step up to these podiums here, I'll explain your first challenge... if I feel like it."

As Jeff went up to the podium, Stefani remained where she was and asked, "Well, do you feel like it?" "Just get up there." Stefani sighed and stood behind the podium opposite Jeff. A spotlight, then, shown on Chris as he somehow changed into a tuxedo. "Get ready for challenge one, you guys! Like I said, the first challenge is the easiest so you better get some points in! The first thing I said you guys need to remember is who got you here. Here, in my hand, I have multiple cards with questions that ask about some of the school subjects we've went over here. I will ask you which student was eliminated during that school subject and challenge. Buzz-in if you think you know the answer and I will call on you. Correct answers are worth 5 points. Incorrect answers give the other person a chance to answer for 5 points. I'd pay close attention to this challenge because it will act as a guide for challenge two. Competitors ready!?" "YES!!" Stefani replied. "Bring it!" Jeff said, as well.

Chris began, "Alright, let's start off easy--who was eliminated during the Gym challenge?" Jeff immediately buzzed in, "It was Zach!" Chris imitated a game show buzzer, "WRONG-A-MUNDO, Stefani?" Jeff looked at Chris in anguish as Stefani answered, "Well, you said easy, so... Brandon?" Chris nodded his head, "That's correct! Question 2... who got the can during the R.O.T.C. boot-camp?!" Jeff buzzed in quickly, tiring himself out and taking deep breaths, "It was... It... It was... whoo... Uhhh... Oh! Zach!" Chris looked at him, "WRONG! What is with you and guessing Zach? He won that challenge. Guess the dude's left a mark on ya, huh?" Stefani chimed in, "Lilie organized a vote out to get Webby out during that challenge, right?" "Once again, that is co-rrect! Another 5 points!" Chris announced. Stefani clapped to herself, as Jeff looked at her with a raised eyebrow.

Jeff: Okay... sooooo not trying to sound like a bad sport here, but, come on! Stefani's already creaming me! STEFANI! How does this happen? Oh, my gosh, I've never felt so stupid! Staff members: (multiple voices off-screen) Really? (Jeff's eyes widen)

As time passes by and more points are distributed, Chris comes back into the picture laughing, "Hahahaha, wow, I can't believe what's going on here!" Jeff is shown pouting at his podium while Stefani stands confidently behind hers. As the camera pans to Stefani, an angelic choir is heard in the background. "Okay, okay, enough with the mushiness," Chris interrupted, "and take a look at where the real stuff's happening! Up on the scoreboard!" Chris pointed upwards as Jeff and Stefani looked up.

"Wow, she's smokin' ya, eh, Jeff?" Chris whispered to the finalist. Jeff clinched his teeth and started breathing a bit heavier. Chris slowly backed away, "O... Kay. Who was eliminated during the Cooking challenge?" "Duh, Johnathan!" Stefani replied. Jeff began breathing even heavier. "I don't get how that was a 'duh' moment, I barely remember the guy, but okay. Onto Question 10, and this one's a good one! Who was eliminated during the Computer Drips episode?" Jeff looked up as he began to ponder; the camera panned to Stefani who had her hand on her buzzer but was staring at Jeff, wondering if he'll get the answer. Chris looked at his watch as the seconds went by.

Stefani: I knew what it was, but... I mean, I had a comfortable lead already, I felt like I owed it to him.

Jeff seemed to be really struggling with figuring out the answer. With teeth clenched, he moaned to himself, "C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, who is it?" Chris looked worried, "Jeff? If you don't know, you don't have to strain yourself. I'd rather not have to treat you for any problems that may occur due to your brain being exposed to this much thinkin-- Chris was cut off by Stefani's buzzer. Stefani sighed, "Ariel. And Dedrek. They were both eliminated." "And that's another 10 points to our fair finalist, Ms. Stefani!" "10!?" Jeff accused, "I thought you said they were 5 points per question!" "Yeahhhhh, about that. This question had 2 answers, sooooo... 5 x 2!"

Jeff: (pointing into the camera) That's it. She's majorly kicking my butt! This isn't right, I can't remember everyone. Time... to do what any other guy would do at a time like this. (looks devilishly to his surroundings)

"Next question!" Chris went on, "Not like it matters anyway, thanks to Hurricane Stefani making the city of Jefftown look like a pile of lost hopes and dreams. Okay. Who got the boot during the Art challenge?" Immediately, Stefani rang in. As she took a breath, Jeff let loose a humongous fart and fanned the stench her way. "It's... augh!!!" Stefani began coughing out of control. "Jeff!!" Chris buzzed her out, "INCORRECT! Jeff?" "What!? That wasn't my answer!" Jeff looked up and smiled, "I remember that one, it's Nalyd." "5 more points for Jeff, that's right!" Chris said, causing Jeff to dance a bit. "What? How!?" Stefani demanded explanations. "Well, you said Jeff, and obviously he's standing right next to you, so..."

Stefani: (frowning) That's not... fair.

"Eliminated from the Economics challenge?" Chris shouted out. Stefani buzzed in, however, as she was buzzing in, Jeff prepared a gigantic sneeze and sneezed all over Stefani. "Ewwwww!! Jeff!" Stefani shouted. Chris look confused but stifled laughter, "He's standing right there! He hasn't left yet." "Yeah, Lilie left then!" Jeff rang, buzzing in. "That is absolutely correct!!" Chris smiled. Stefani began growling as Jeff did a type of victory dance. "Uh-huh! Oh, yeah! Uh-huh! Oh, yeah!" he chanted.

A montage of questions began being asked and Jeff used his bodily functions to overcome Stefani, who fainted throughout the questions. "Carter! Tammi! Alyssa! Katherine!" Jeff shrieked. "Correct, yes, right again!" Chris replied. The camera panned over to Stefani, who was on the floor. She struggled placing her hand on her podium to try pulling herself up, "It burns! It buuuuuuurns!!" Chris immediately asked, "Politics challenge?" Jeff rang in and burped towards Stefani, "Uhh... Ryan?" The fumes of the burp hovered to Stefani and her body fell yet again.

Jeff: What can I say? (burps) I am still a guy.

"Correct!" Chris lifted his hands. Jeff bellowed, "Awesome!!" "Alright, last question, who was eliminated during the Driver's Education cour--" Chris was interrupted by Stefani, who sprang up and hit a buzzer immediately. "Terry! Terry! Terry!! It was Terry!" she said, hitting a buzzer multiple times, breathing heavily. "Well, Stefani, you are right again," Chris began. Stefani began weakly cheering, "Whoo..." "...but you rang in on Jeff's podium. So, 5 points to Jeff once again!" Stefani looked down to see her mistake, groaned, and passed out once more. "As we have someone check out Stefani to make sure she hasn't suffered any diseases from Jeff's... uhh... body, let's look at the shake up in the scoreboard!" Chris pointed up once more to show the results of the first challenge:

"With a score of 50 to 40, Jeff is currently in the lead!" Chris announced, "Wow, Stefani, how does this make you feel? ... Stefani? ...... Stefani?" The camera went over to see Stefani was still coughing madly due to Jeff's fumes.

Stefani: He fully che-- (cough) che-- (cough) CHE-- ... (coughs and hits chin on confessional desk) cheated.

Jeff began fist-pumping and pointed in the camera, "Woo-hoo! That's for all the boys back home, man!!" "Yes, I'm sure they're all very proud of you," Chris snidely replied. "Now... onto the second part of the graduation challenge! We'll see you all there!" The camera faded out on Jeff, Chris, and a semi-conscious Stefani.

As the camera faded back in, Jeff and Stefani were now shown to be standing at the entrance of Gilded Glory with Chris next to them. He began announcing, "Welcome back to the epic conclusion of Total Drama 101! We're here with Jeff and Stefani, who are about to complete their second challenge today! Remember, the finalist who receives the most points at the end of all our torture today will be crowned the winner of Total Drama 101 and will receive ONE MILLION DOLLARS!" The camera slid over to show Jeff and Stefani, drooling at the mouth and humming over what Chris had said. "If you guys remember, the second thing I said that must happen during each graduation ceremony is that those who are aiming to be Class Rank 1 need to take some time and see if those who have fallen before you still remember you! Jeff. Stefani. I welcome you to the Trail of Fail." Chris opened the doors to the school as Jeff and Stefani took it all in. When they saw the school, their facial expressions went back to normal as they saw no physical changes. They walked in a bit and the door closed behind them. "Uhh, Chris, what gives?" Jeff wondered. "Yeah, this is just the school. Nothing's different." Stefani added. Chris looked in the school, "Correct! Nothing has changed within the school, but within the school hallways is the Trail of Fail! Your next task is an easy one! The both of you will be going, together, to many of the subject rooms we've been in, from start to finish. Note you won't be going in every room. In each of these rooms you do go in somewhere is a Hall Pass that will have a number of points on it and the next room you are to go to. Some Passes are worth more than others, but there is only one Hall Pass in each room. The Passes were all hidden in the room by the person eliminated in that episode. For example, the first room you will be going in is the Gym room when Brandon was eliminated. In that room is a Hall Pass that he hid for one of you to get so you can get to the next... and the next... and the next. You will end when you get to our Fashion Design room where Katherine hid a Hall Pass to tell you to come back here to this spot for your third challenge."

"So... you expect us to search each of these rooms for a little piece of paper, bro?" Jeff looked confused. "Relax," Chris told him. "This is where things get interesting!" Chris walked over to the entrance/exit of Gilded Glory and opened the door again to reveal all of the eliminated contestants. They all stood at the doors.

Jeff and Stefani gasped immensely as they looked at everyone's faces. "Allow me to welcome back the 18 contestants who didn't make it to this very spot!!" Chris bellowed. "Jeff!!" a familiar voice yelled out in the back. At that point, Brandon, Gretel, and Terry were thrown out of the way and Katherine emerged in front of the group with hearts in her eyes. Stefani saw Terry's body get yanked into the air and ran after him, "Terry!!" Stefani tore into the group, slapping Tammi in the process. "Watch where you're going!" Tammi told her. "Babe!!" Jeff shouted. At that point, they both ran to embrace each other. They met each other and hugged immediately as group "Awes" were heard in the crowd of losers. "I missed you!" they both said to each other. "... it's been a couple of days," a random voice said in the group. "Shut up, this is love! You ain't about that life!" Katherine retorted. The camera went over to Stefani, checking on Terry, "Are you okay?!" Terry slowly opened his eyes, "I... I... I am now." He was lost in Stefani's arms as they shared a hug and went over how much they really missed each other. After the hug, Stefani noticed, "Hey, what's with that?" She pointed to Terry's shirt, which was blue and had a giant 'J' on it. "Oh, yeah, this. Well, you see--" Terry was interrupted.

"Hey, can I have my fame time back? ... Yes? Alrighty, then. Thank you very much." Chris sarcastically coined, as the camera went back to him. "As I was saying before this rude interruption of people missing each other, this is where things get interesting!" Jeff, Stefani, Katherine, and Terry went back over to Chris with the finalists in front. "You and one loser of your choosing will go through each of the pre-selected rooms to check them for the hidden Hall Pass, to make the process go a bit easier. Now, if you notice, the losers are all either wearing a blue shirt with a 'J' on it or a pink shirt with an 'S' inscribed." "And they're so fetch, too! Thanks, Chris!" Ariel smiled to Chris, causing Chris to cringe. "Eeeeeugh. Yeah, no problem. Anyway, if you two remember the first challenge, I had you guys tell me who got eliminated when for points. Weeeeeeeell, congratulations! Meet your new finale challenge helpers! Each person you guessed correctly in the first challenge--" "--will be helping you in this challenge!" Lilie finished Chris' thought, winking at Jeff. Jeff looked at her, a bit confused as usual. "Correct!" Chris said. "Now, here's a couple guidelines to remember with this challenge. One, you will only be going through 6 rooms, not every one of them. We don't have the time for that in this special. Two, since we are only going through 6 rooms, you can only use a person once in this challenge. Jeff, you have 10 losers helping you; Stefani, you have 8. Plenty to go around! Jeff, you correctly answered for Liz, Samantha, Nalyd, Lilie, Carter, Tammi, Alyssa, Katherine, Ryan, and Terry..." "I still think he cheated to get Terry!" Stefani cried. "Details, details," Chris responded, not caring. "And Stefani, helping you are Brandon, Webby, Gretel, Chuck, Zach, Ariel, Dedrek, and Johnathan!" "So, Jeff gets all the girls and Stefani gets most of the guys?" Johnathan asked. Chris put his hand up, "Details, details!" "What!? Hey, I'm a girl!!" Gretel shouted out. "DETAILS, DETAILS!" Chris yelled back, causing Gretel to frown and much of the group to laugh. "Remember, in each of the rooms you go in, the person that was eliminated that night is not allowed to go in there! Obviously, that would ruin the graduation fun. Now, for the challenge. Finalists, pick your favorite loser!"

The group divided for Jeff and Stefani.

Jeff put his index finger on his chin as he thought while Stefani scratched her head.

Stefani: This isn't right. I've been put at a big disadvantage. Jeff has more people to pick from!! I'll get Chris for this... I had no idea who to pick. They all didn't seem too thrilled to be on my team. None of them really looked like they wanted to be there.

"I choose Zach," Stefani announced. "Sweet! Like candy..." Zach walked over and stood behind Stefani as they high-fived. The camera fixed itself on Jeff. "Uhh... uhh...," Jeff was stammering. "Pick me, Jeff! I can help!" Liz called out to him. Katherine looked at Jeff and responded to them both, "I can help out moooooore, sweetie!" Katherine batted her eyes at Jeff causing his to widen.

Jeff: I had to be smart with this. I knew Katherine would be nothing but a distraction for me and I'm not sure how confident I was in Liz... I mean, look how far she got. I had to pick somebody...

"I pick..... Tammi." Jeff announced. "REALLY!?" Tammi, Stefani, and Katherine all shouted out. Katherine looked disdained and sniffled a bit. Jeff sheepishly laughed.

Tammi: Jeff chose me first. I mean, not like there were any other options. I mean, look at me, I'm fabulous. And, I would be where Stefani is if it weren't for Ryan and his backstabbing!! Augh! I really didn't want to help either of them, but... Chris said there could be something in it for the losers if we did. Jeff: I had to choose Tammi. We worked really well with each other during the Baby-making challenge. You know, after all the fighting and screaming... I saw light at the end of the tunnel. Hopefully it works out again.

Tammi slowly walked over to Jeff and stood next to him. "You got this, Jeff!" Katherine screamed out to him. "C'mon, everyone! Cheer them on!" Katherine nudged Nalyd's shoulder. "Whoo. Whoo. W-H-oooooh." Nalyd chanted with no energy.

Nalyd: I'll admit, I'm a little bitter that I didn't make it to where Jeff is right now. Or the other girl. So, obviously, cheering is not the first thing that comes to mind when I think about the two of them.

"Competitors ready!?" Chris called out. "GO!" The four students raced into the hallway and went into the Gym room with cheering trailing behind him. "Kick his butt, Stefani!!" Terry yelled out, with his hands in the air. "Hey! Who's side are you on?!" Liz asked him. He seductively said to himself, "M'lady's." He sighed, "The only reason I'm over here is because Stefani didn't answer my question right--but that's okay. She's still amazing." "You tell 'em, Terry!" Webby was overhearing their conversation. Carter put in, "Stay on your own side, dork." "You should be telling your own team that!" Gretel said, eyeing Carter.

"Where is this thing?!" Tammi said to herself, checking under desks. Zach walked over to gym equipment and began lifting weights, "Nothing over here?" Stefani was checking some of the bulletin boards when she noticed Zach, "Um, Zach, what are you doing?" "Looking for the Hall Pass... like you are!" he responded, bench-pressing. Stefani sighed, "You're not looking, you're lifting!" The two of them began to bicker a bit as Jeff started searching around the floor. His feet led him to a corner of the room where he severely bumped his head on the wall and fell back. "Augh!!!" Jeff yelled out, rubbing his head. Tammi saw this and ran over to him, "Can't you watch where-- Hmm..."

Tammi: Well, at that point, I was about to lay him out for his sheer stupidity, but then I thought... that may not be the best thing to do. If he wins, maybe he'll share some of the money with me. I'll see to it that he does. (small chuckle, rubs hands together)

"where-- Hmm..." Tammi stopped. "I mean, I mean... uhh... Jeff, are you okay?!" "Eugh, yeah, I'm great." Jeff assured her. "I don't know what I--" At that moment, the Hall Pass fell into Jeff's hands; the camera panned up to see that the Hall Pass was wedged in the bell in the classroom. Jeff looked up and saw the bell, "Righteous! We found it!" He read what was on the Hall Pass aloud, "Felic-- Fellicit-- Felicii-- Fe-- Feli-- What's this say?" Jeff showed Tammi the Hall Pass. Tammi sighed, "You idio-- I mean, uhh... let me read it for you, Jeff." She cleared her throat and read, "It says Felicitations to the individual who encountered this endowed accolade. It is worth 10 scoring unit tallies. Highest advantages! The successor accolade can be located in the Television Broadcasting room. Love, Brandon." Jeff looked at Tammi, "Uhhhhhhhhhh... Well, I got the 'Love, Brandon' part. What did he say?" "Oh, no!! They already have it!" Stefani looked behind her. "Zach! Put the weights down!" The both of them ran over to Tammi and Jeff. Tammi cringed at Jeff and then let out a deep breath, "Focus, Tammi. Jeff, it's basically saying congratulations on finding the Hall Pass, it's worth 10 points when we give it to Chris and the next one is in the Broadcasting room where Alyssa was eliminated. Stefani ran over and pushed Tammi down, giving Zach time to steal the Hall Pass from her. "Thanks for the information!!" Stefani let out. Zach met her and gave her the Hall Pass, which she stuffed in her bra and ran out the door.

"And that's one Hall Pass for Team Stefani!" Chris and the losers met Zach and Stefani at the door. Members of Stefani's team cheered. "Yes, I knew you'd be able to locate it!" Brandon shouted. "Advance, Stefani! Advance!" "Nice job!" Johnathan added. Jeff and Tammi came running out of the room as well. Out of breath, Jeff cried, "It's because she stole it from me! I found it first!" "Wrong...," Stefani gave him the hand. "Your head made it fall and you just so happened to grab it. I saw it, so I went for it!

Stefani: If he's gonna play hard ball, then I'm playing even HARDERBALL. YEAH! Like, two bats at once or something! Let's go!

"That's 10 points for Stefani," Chris said as he took the Hall Pass from her. "Round Two, you guys! Who's next?" Jeff looked over and saw Katherine standing innocently in front of his teammates. "I choooooooooose.... uhhh.... Carter! Let's go!!" Jeff smiled as Carter walked forward. Katherine's smiled immediately turned into a frown.

Katherine: What!? Why isn't Jeff picking me!? What's wrong?? (smells own breath) Do I offend? I'm still hot, aren't I?! Right? ... RIGHT!?

Carter whispered to Chris, "Pssst, how much do I have to give you to have Jeff win this one?" Chris whispered back, "Ohh, just--" He yelled in his ear, "ONE MILLION BIG ONES!" "Aaaaaaah!!" Carter's ears started ringing. "How about $8.00 so you can get yourself some really good mouthwash!?"

Carter: So little Jeff chose me this time! Huh, like I could blame him. This Pass belongs to us.

"Now that that's settled, Stefani?" Chris wondered. Stefani picked, "Well, I think I'll go with Ariel this time." Ariel was sitting down. He, then, stood up proudly and proceeded to walk to Stefani. "We got this, Stefani!" Ariel walked over to Stefani, but tripped before making it to her.

Stefani: ... I hope I don't regret this. Ariel's a very... safe... person to choose. Ariel: I don't care which team I'm on, as long as it's away from Ryan. I have the utmost confidence in Stefani winning! Team Stefani!! Whoop-whoop!

"Let's just get this over with!" Ryan yelled out to Chris. "I'm ready to go home..." "I was wondering when he was going to say something. As you wish, Lord Chump! Stefani, Ariel, Carter, and Jeff! Ready!? Set?? GO!!" Chris announced. They each raced into the TV Broadcasting room.

"Nice to see you again, man," Jeff said to Carter. "It's been a while, bro." Carter rolled his eyes, "Yeah, yeah, now where's this Hall Pass?" Stefani walked into the Broadcasting room with Ariel. "You search that half and I'll search this one. Is that okay?" Ariel smiled, "Sounds good to me!" Ariel went over to the right side of the room and started looking around the computers and keyboards.

Ariel: I used to be a boy-scout back in the day. Hopefully those skills can help me out. I earned a lot of badges while there. If there was a Find-Blue-Hall-Pass badge, I'd probably have been the first to get it.

"Not seeing it over here!" Ariel yelled out to Stefani. He ran across Carter's hand and greeted him, "Hi, Carter!!" "Oh, hey... it's you," Carter replied to him. "How.. uhh... How has life been?"

Carter: Talking to Ariel is probably one of the most awkward things someone could do.

"--and so Ryan sabotaged me, when I thought he was supposed to be looking out for me!" Ariel had began telling Carter about his life. "Uh-huh, uh-huh," Carter barely responded to Ariel. He continued, "Yeah! Yeah! I thought I was supposed to be in an alliance with him but no! He backstabbed me when during the Computer challenge with that Ace guy!" Carter rolled his eyes, "Right, right..."

The camera went over to Jeff, who asked Stefani, "Any luck yet?" Stefani heard him but ignored him purposefully. "Oh, so that's how it's gotta be, dude," Jeff told her. "Well, now the gloves are comin' off!" "You don't even wear gloves, Jeff," Stefani laughed at him. He growled, "Well, if I wore gloves then this is when they'd be comin' off! Yeah!!" Jeff began running around the floor, scouting for the Hall Pass.

"He told me who to vote for almost every elimination ceremony! And, then during the time I went home, he set it up to where me and Dedrek would leave at the same time! I mean, why would you sabotage yourself like that!? Seriously... What did I even do to leave? I'm nice!" Ariel was going off. Carter sighed, "Maybe it's because you're an annoying, pathetic excuse for a player and can't ever shut. UP!" Ariel stayed silent and almost began crying. "And the waterworks start..." Carter sadly said to himself.

"Found it!" Jeff said, pulling out the Hall Pass from out of a camcorder's hardware. He read it aloud to himself, "To whoever found this Hall Pass, congratulations! You're one step closer to winning the million! This Hall Pass is worth 20 points if you are the one to give it to Chris. The next one can be found in the English room. I think Zach got eliminated there. Good luck! Alyssa. Wow! Thanks, Alyssa! I owe you one!" Jeff ran over and grabbed Carter from Ariel's rant and headed towards the room door.

"Carter, come back!!" Ariel chased after them, almost slipping on the way. "Uhhh, I'll be back later! Just wait here for me!" Carter winked at him. Ariel stopped in his tracks and smiled, "Okay!!" He stood in that same spot. Stefani saw that Carter and Jeff were headed towards the door with the Hall Pass and sighed, "C'mon, Ariel, they're gonna get the Pass!" "No, no, you go on ahead! Carter said he's coming back here so we can finish talking!" Ariel smiled at her. "You... you sure?" "'Course! Go ahead!" Stefani shrugged her shoulders and caught up to Jeff and Carter, who had already given the Hall Pass to Chris. "20 points to Jeff and Carter!" Chris patted Jeff on the back "Great job, Jeff! You make me proud to wear this shirt!" Alyssa cheered for him. "That goes double for me!" Katherine told him, trying to outdo everyone. Alyssa looked at her questionably and brushed it off.

"That look..." Lilie said to herself. Nalyd smirked, "She's probably just wondering what size Katherine wears so she can still her clothes or something." "What?" "What?" Nalyd mocked Lilie. Lilie gave Nalyd the same look.

"It's time for Round Three, everyone!" Chris said. "Stefani... you're already short 2 people... now it looks like you're short another. Where's Ariel?" "He's still in there. Said something about him and Carter talking. He's waiting on Carter to go back in there." Everyone immediately began staring at Carter. "What?!" Carter shrieked. "I'll sneak back in there and get him!"

Carter: ... after I win this one million dollars!!-- I mean, after I help Jeff win this one million dollars.

Carter gave everyone a fake smile. "Not my problem," Chris said to everyone. Then, everyone began exclaiming noises of agreement as if they didn't care as well. Chris continued, "You guys know the drill. Pick your next favorite loser!" Jeff and Stefani looked at who was left. Stefani panned through her group to see Johnathan and Webby standing innocently, Brandon playing with a calculator, Gretel trying to see what Brandon is doing, and Dedrek watching Chuck sleep. "I want Webby!" Stefani exclaimed. Instantly hyperactive, Webby ran over to Stefani side and high-fived her multiple times, "Noice, noice, noice!!" "Hey, man, that's my word!" Jeff got offended. Samantha interjected, "When... when have you said that?" "Bunches of times, man! Like, uhh... that one time. And then there was also that other time where I... ummm..." Many people began rolling their eyes. Ryan growled softly.

Ryan: (groans violently) It creases me that his incompetent, surfer-voiced, idiocy made it to the Final Two! I WAS CHEATED and everyone knows it! I really deserve to be there! If it's the last thing I do, I will be the person walking out of here with that money! (points to the camera, puts his finger on the lens) And don't you forget that.

"Touchy. Jeff?" Chris awaited Jeff's response. Katherine, once again, looked deeply into Jeff's eyes. Jeff looked through who was left to be chosen. Jeff sighed, "I'm choosing Katherine nex--" "FINALLY!!!" Katherine exclaimed. She ran over to Jeff and immediately began making out with him, forcibly. Sounds of violent face-sucking was heard indiscreetly. "Ugh, get a room," Zach called out to the both of them. "And a tan..." Terry added in, causing Stefani to laugh. Terry immediately noticed this

Terry: Yep... she wants this.

They continued making out until Chris pulled them both apart, "Alright, I've seen enough of the mouthy-mouthy bang bang. We still have a graduation to complete." "Right!!" Katherine said. She turned to Jeff, overexcitedly, "K. Let's go. I talked to Zach while you were gone, I know exactly where he hid the Pass!" "You... what?" Chris overheard what she said. Katherine's eyes widened, "Uhh... nothing! Nothing!" Chris raised a brow, "Did you say you talked to Zach?" "Of course not!" Everyone, minus Jeff and Katherine, then looked over at Zach. "What?!" Zach said. "I didn't know that was a rule!" "That was a rule!?" Dedrek finally chimed in. "I told everyone on my team where mine was, too." At that point, others began talking in agreement with Zach and Dedrek. As the talking progressed, Chris got upset, "What?!? How is this supposed to be a competition, then!? Now everyone knows where the Passes are!!" "We were trying to help out our teams," Gretel snorted. "Nobody asked of your opinion, Meg. Ugh, okay! Brandon, Alyssa, did you guys tell Jeff, Stefani, or their helpers where your Passes were??" "False!" Brandon yelped. "Of course not! I'm above cheating!" Alyssa stammered.

Tammi: ... Something just tells me that she's faker than Ryan's face. But, whatever. (ponders)

"Fine, these two Passes count, but we're moving onto the next and final challenge! This one has been tainted! I should revoke both of your diplomas for this..." Chris announced. "And this is a big one! I hope you all are ready--back outside, everyone! It's gonna be a good one!" Everyone began heading outside.

The camera went back into the TV Broadcasting room. "Any minute, he'll be back. Guess he's in the bathroom or something," Ariel impishly smiled to himself. "Yep, aaaaaaaany minute now."

"Finally, the climax of the finale! And we need to make this fast! We're running low on time!" Chris announced. "First, let's get a small update on the scores. Look up there!" Chris pointed upward and, randomly, a screen descended from the sky. "So, we don't have the budget for things that we needed here, but we have a budget for this huge school and its random flying screens? Yeah, that fits." Nalyd wondered, as he looked up.

"That million dollars is looking better and better!!" Jeff nudged Stefani. They both began walking to their podiums. Chris walked onto the stage where the podiums were and beckoned to everyone as they began taking seats in front of the stage, "Jeff is currently the lead with 70 points and Stefani is 20 points behind. But, that may all change right now! Like I told you losers, you guys will have the opportunity to affect the outcome of this game! Each and every one of you have 5 points that you can distribute to either Jeff or Stefani. Soon enough, you all will be going into the confessionals to give your points out. You are not, repeat NOT, able to give some of your points to Jeff and some to Stefani. It's either all or nothing. If you divide your points, none of them will count! Now, for those of you that are iffy about giving your points out, I'm giving each and every loser one final chance to ask a question if you want to--try not to 'want to', like I said, we're low on time. After all is said and done, Jeff and Stefani will be delivering their final graduation speeches to all of you and they will be judged by me! The better speech will be receiving 25 points! The losing speech gets 10. So, again, another possible game changer! This will be the final challenge! Hope you all participate in the best way you can! You know... for the viewers. That's always the best way. First, questions, then, points in the confessional, and finally, the final grad. speeches. The finalist with more points will instantly become a millionaire! Brandon, you're first, you got a question?" Brandon thought long and hard, "No, Chris, I don't have a question. I apperceive and comprehend all I need to!" "Your vocabulary frightens me, all of us. It needs to be reclassified as a federal offense. Chuck?" Everyone began looking around for Chuck. Then, people began looking down to see that, unsurprisingly, Chuck was passed out. Chris sighed, walked over to him, and kicked him, "Wake up!!" "Huh!?" Chuck wondered. He took his shades off and started looking around, "Whoa... How did I get here?" "Do you or do you not have a question?" Chris demanded. "Question for what...?" "That's a no. You may go back to sleep." "Cooly." He, then, passed back out and began snoring, causing everyone to cover their ears. "Brandon, you have been outmatched. This sound is a bigger federal offense than your sound. Next up is Liz. Liz, do you have any kind words for us?" Liz stood up, "Well, I just want to say good luck to the both of you and I hope that we can all still--" "We ain't got time for that, Liz!" Chris cut her off. "Gretel, do you have anything to say?" Gretel stood up, "Well--" "Enough of that! Next, Alyssa!" Liz and Gretel sat down and grunted while Alyssa stood up, "Do you both believe you should be where you're standing?"

Chris: What did I say? I said "try not to have questions"! And what does Alyssa do? She tries to have a (bleep)ing question.

"Honestly, I think I have a good relationship with each and every one of you here, you get me?" Jeff started. "And, if that doesn't explain why I'm standing in front of you, then my answer would be no. If it does, then my answer is yes." "YOU TELL 'EM, JEFFY!" Katherine stood up and hollered for her boyfriend. Stefani started, "Well, in all honesty, I can't pinpoint everything I did to get to this point here, but I'm here for a reason, right? If it was an accident or on purpose, it doesn't change the fact that I'm here. I hope you all take that into consideration!" Sounds of positive feedback was heard throughout the crowd of people. "W-w-well, I basically said that, too!" Jeff replied to the crowd. "Thank you, Alyssa! Onto the next person, Carter!" Chris said. Carter raised his nose in the air, "I already know who I'm giving my points to, thank you. I have no more questions." "...onto Johnathan..." Johnathan stood up, "Hey, guys, it's me, Johnathan. Uhh, I wanted an opinion. And this may sway who I give my points to. If you guys weren't the Final Two, based on what you've seen, who do you think the Final Two would actually be? In other words, if you guys didn't play, who wold the Final Two be?" Jeff and Stefani both thought a bit for this as Chris checked his watch. "I would have to say..." Jeff started. "...uhhh...." Stefani mumbled. Johnathan smiled at the both of them.

Johnathan: Just like I thought. They're both pretty vain. If it were me up there, I would have easily said Nalyd and Alyssa. Both of them had really good odds but ended up on the wrong side of the pencil... or pen... whichever team we were on. That's 10 seconds in the mind of Johnnie!

"I'd say Alyssa and Terry," Jeff said. Stefani began snickering, "I'll... hehe... I'll say Nalyd and Ryan." A thunderous amount of laughter was then heard throughout the school. Ryan stood up, "I was going to be there where Jeff is! But, Chris is just a crappy host!!" "Yeah, blame it on the host, that'll alleviate you," Nalyd calmly said, sitting next to him. "Why are you even over here?! You're killing the oxygen over here with that god-awful hoodie! You're supposed to be wearing your Jeff shirt! Can't you listen?"

Nalyd: (exposes the shirt under his hoodie) The hoodie never comes off... Never.

Ryan slapped Nalyd, which caused Nalyd to slap him back--resulting in a slap-fight. Chris finished laughing at Ryan and kept up his speech, "And onto the next loser: Webby." Webby stood up, "I already know who is getting my 5 points. I'm giving them to Jeff! That is all." "What the heck, Webby!? I thought you were helping me!" Stefani whimpered. "What!? We were on the same team! Gotta represent the Pencils!" "Party on, Webster!!" Jeff raised his fist in the air for Webby, causing Webby to do the same. "Well, if you do that, then I'm giving my 5 points to Stefani, to cancel yours out!" Zach proudly stated. Stefani began clapping her hands and squealing. "Well, Zach was next anyway... after him is Samantha! Sam, any thoughts?" Chris wondered. Samantha stayed silent. "Samantha? Helloooooooo?" Samantha continued to remain silent and then shook her head. "O... Kay. Next up is Arie-- Oh, boy... Ariel. Go ahead, Ariel, take up the rest of our screentime." Chris sadly said. After a few seconds of silence, Chris looked around, "Ariel? ... Anyone seen Ariel?" Everyone began looking around.

The camera flashed back to the TV Broadcasting room as random, catchy synthesizer music began playing in the background. A sign was held up in front of the camera that read "Ariel Chat". Ariel's voice-over was heard, "Weeeeeeeeeeeelcome to Ariel Chat! The only TV show where you get to hear Ariel chat it up about... everything! With your host... Ariel!!" Ariel walked on-screen and sat in front of the camera, "Thank you, thank you! Welcome to Ariel Chat, everyone! Hope you all are having a great day today! Let's get down to business. First, let's talk about my time on TD101. Back on Day One, I was probably the happiest student to arrive to Gilded Gl--"

The camera went back to Chris, "We'll have a producer go look for him or something. But, for now, the next person is Dedrek! Does Dedrek have anything to say?" Dedrek was shown to be passed out with Chuck in the back. "What is it with these guys and sleeping?" Chris wondered. "This is the hottest show on the tube! And you're in it. Not watching it, you're IN it. That's double-the-fun! And they're sleeping! Tammi, please tell me you have something interesting to say." Tammi walked over the passed-out Dedrek and Chuck and stood in front of the stage where Jeff and Stefani stood, "Jeff. Stefani. Congrats on making it so far, but sadly only one of you can win. And I'm willing to help one of you out. My 5 points will be going to that person." She gave them both a piece of paper. "My 'question', if you will, is actually a request. I want a cut of the winnings. And I mean a big cut. My 5 points will be going to the person who opts to give me the biggest cut. On that paper, please write an amount on that first blank and your signature on the second blank closest to the bottom of the paper." Both finalists did so, rather quickly. "Alright," Tammi continued with a fake smile, "Hold them up!" The finalists did so and it showed that Stefani was willing to give $50,000 to Tammi while Jeff was willing to give her $50,000.50. "Heh, looks like I gotcha... again," Jeff told Stefani.

Jeff: Did I think to look over at Stefani's paper? No, of course I didn't think that. (short pause) I just went ahead and did it! Take that, Mrs. Smith! And you said cheating off of someone can't win you money!

"And, it looks like I win!" Tammi said confidently. Lilie looked up at both papers, "Don't you mean Jeff wins?" "Oh, well, he gets my points, I guess, but the ultimate winner is me!" Tammi shrieked, snatching the two papers from them. She, then, doused the papers with a solution to reveal that there was more writing on them. "Thanks for signing my contracts, doofuses!!" Tammi said, as she joyously went back to her seat. "Hey!" Jeff got enraged. Stefani did as well, "No fair! Chris, do something!"

Tammi: Like I said, I knew I was going to get something from all of this. And, now, thanks to these contracts, I'm going to either win $50K or $50K and 50 cents! Personally, I'm now rooting for Jeff. That's 50 extra cents!!

"Uhh... That was... uhh... very well done, Tammi," Chris said, in awe. "I can't do anything about that except be amazed that she did it. I mean, all I can say she did was make you guys sign contracts. Looks like Tammi is gonna win something after all! Terry, you're next!" "I just want to know..." he began, standing up "... what you both are going to do with the money and-- Oh, who am I kidding?! STEFANI, YOU GOT 5 MORE POINTS COMING YOUR WAY!" She beamed red, "Thanks, sweetheart!!" "Terry! Bro! What gives, man!?" Jeff wanted to know. "Sorry, man," Terry told him. "I strongly believe in chicks before.... uhhh.... yeah, that." "And we'll see just how far that gets him in the real world," Chris whispered to the camera and the viewers, "I mean! Umm... Lilie, you're up. You got a question?" Lilie had a smirk on her face, "Jeff. Stefani. Here, I have two sheets of paper, and I--" "No." they both told her, annoyed. Lilie blinked at them both, took it in, and scoffed as she sat back down.

Lilie: It was worth a shot. Money is my sixth sense. (eyes turn into dollar signs)

"Nalyd, any thoughts?" Chris asked him. Nalyd stood up with poise and dignity with his head held high. "Jeff... Stefani... I have but one thing to ask you both. And that one thing is ..................... Can I have your spot?!" "What...?" they both asked, confused. "Please?!" "No." Jeff told him. "Please?" "No!" Stefani shouted. "Please?" "No." "Please?" "No." "Please?" "No." "Please?" "No." "Please?" "NO!!" they both shouted. "Enough! This high level of... of... desperation isn't supposed to be at graduations!" Chris stopped the bickering.

Ryan: Like I said, purely pathetic... He's always been pathetic and he always will be. Nalyd: (walks into the confessional) Oh, like you're not?! Who sells body organs for manicure schedule times!? Ryan: THEY WERE NECESSARY! And how did you know about that!?

"What sayeth you, Ryan? You're next." said Chris. Ryan stood up, "I just want to say that I don't think either of you deserve to be there because of the fatal mistake Chris made by kicking me off the show! I had everything a Finalist needed to get there! I am one of the real Final Two competitors! What kind of crappy show is this!? I--" "And, that's enough out of Ryan for one day! It was nice while it lasted! Finally, we talk to the person who came so close to the Final Two: Kat--" "My points are going to my Jeffy-boo! Think before speaking, Chris!" Katherine said, staring at Jeff with more hearts in her eyes. "Hey! I won't stand for that insult!" Chris said. He then realized he was standing and immediately sat on the stage in between the two podiums. "Now that we have heard from what the losers have to say and everyone knows who to give their points to, it's time for you guys to do so! You all will--"

Chris was interrupted by a TD101 producer. "Get over there, you!" a scruffy voice said, as Ariel gets thrown on-screen. A note was handed to Chris by the same producer. Chris read the note, "... 'had his own show'?? ...... '#2 show in the nation'?!?! ... What were you doing?" "Well, I was waiting for Carter to come back and he never did! Then, I realized I was in the Broadcast room, so..." "Whatever, you're here now! What I was saying was everyone will go in the confessional, one-by-one, and pick who you give your 5 points to!" "We get to give someone 5 points!?" Ariel happily exclaimed. "If you were here to hear that, maybe it wouldn't come as a shock to you. Now, everyone, happy distribution!!"

Brandon: (votes) Chuck: (sleeps in the confessional) (airhorn is blown) AAAAAH!!! Wha... What?! (looks down) Jeff? Stefani? Who are th-- (falls asleep again) Liz: Good luck out there, I hope you win! (votes) Gretel: (snort laughs) I'm choosing to vote for Stefani! Girl Power! Plus, we were Pens together! (sneezes, her saliva and mucus hits the area to check for Stefani) Perfect! Alyssa: (votes) Carter: Decision has been made. (votes) Johnathan: I still think they're both pretty vain, but I'm choosing Jeff. I think he'll do something better with the money than Stefani would. (votes) Webby: (votes) Zach: This'll show that Webby... (votes) Team Stef! Samantha: (votes) Ariel: ... Continuing on with Ariel Chat, Carter never showed to come back and talk to me! Then, this random TD101 goon came and-- Dedrek: (wakes up) Sacre bleu! I'm over this show! (votes) Tammi: I am somewhat a woman of my word. In this case, I am. I choose Jeff, he bid more than Stefani. (votes) Terry: Steeeeeeeeeeeeefaniiiiiiiiiii... (makes a heart with his hands and votes) Lilie: I choose Stefani. No offense, but I don't see how Jeff made it so far in this game. The Final Two, really? Guess it'll just be a bigger satisfaction when he loses. (votes) Nalyd: (votes) Ryan: I refuse to vote for either of these-- (Chris interrupts him and gives Ryan a menacing look) Ugh... Fine... (votes) Katherine: YES!!! (votes)

"Alright! After tallying the votes, I have an update on the score so far!!" Chris announced. As everyone cheered, they proceeded to look up. "What are you guys looking at?" Chris looked up also, trying to figure it out. "We're waiting on the scoreboard, to see the scores?" Dedrek told him, yawning. "Oh, that! Well, I don't want to give it away just yet! I'll give one final update after the graduation speeches! First place gets 25 points, second places get a 10-point consolation. Who's up first?!" Jeff raised his hand, "I'll go... I guess." "Alright, then, Jeff!" Chris takes out a notepad. "Let's hear it! You have everyone's undivided attention!"

Jeff cleared his throat and began, "Well, guys, I've... uhh... never really given a graduation speech before. Heck, I haven't graduated yet from my school back home. And, I'm definitely not going to be valedictorian there--unless they, like, elect me into that. But, whatever, I'm going to speak from the heart. And my heart tells me to say that I'm just a normal guy, with a normal life, in pursuit of winning an awesome competition! And, you guys all know me, it's Jeff! I'm not going to promise anything or give out free material objects just for this; that's not who I am. Who I am is a normal person and I aspire to make everyone remember that they are normal people, too. Remember me, everyone, when you're out there in the real world and someone comes along with a superficial attitude and the clothing to match. Remember me, everyone, when life tells you 'Hey, you need to change like everyone else!'. Remember me, everyone, so you can remember yourself. Remember me... Jeff. The normal guy. Uhh.. I think that's all I have to say. Thanks, guys." Jeff looked out in the crowd to see some students roll their eyes, others were actually in tears, and others applauded.

Jeff: I don't really even know what I said, to be quite honest. But, it must have made sense! That's 1 point for the Normal Guy!

"Jeff, you probably could have parted waters with that speech--whatever you said. Stefani, what do you have to say?" Chris asked.

"Alright," Stefani began her speech, "Hey, everyone. I'm Stefani, you know me, you love me. I'm here to present a speech for graduation for you guys. I wanted to talk to you guys about failure. Look around. All of you have failed somehow. I have failed somehow. Jeff has failed somehow. Even Chris has failed somehow. But, you know something? You're still here. Failure opens your eyes to so much more than succession does. Granted, succession is what you aspire for in life, but before succeeding, you must learn to fail. The knowledge you obtain when failing makes you grow wiser. I am wiser because of my failures; I have learned how to fail, so I hope you guys help me in learning to succeed. You will never know what you can truly do until you fail. I will look at either of these outcomes as something I can learn from. If I succeed in winning, I will learn. If I fail in winning, I will most definitely learn. I hope you all further understand, a bit, the importance of failure." A louder, more thunderous applause was heard at the end of Stefani's speech as Chris began clapping, "Bravo, Stefani! Bravo!"

Chris: Honestly, neither of them know a thing about delivering speeches but, hey, the students liked it and I'm sure you all at home gorged on every word she said!

"Now that the speeches have been said, it's time.... finally time.... to determine a winner. I'll go tabulate the points." Chris slowly said. Both Jeff and Stefani gulped and looked at each other. Chris walked off... and came back immediately with one diploma, a Golden A+, and a briefcase filled with cash. "I have tabulated the numbers and we have a winner!" Chris shouted as everyone gasped. "The winner of Total... Drama... 101... IS...."

sorry, tension build... =)

NALYD!!! :D Just kidding... yep... Tension build =)

"JEFF!!" Chris yelled for the final time. Cheers and applause were heard all over. "What!?! NO WAY!!!" Jeff shouted. "Yes, Jeff! Yes way. Jeff gets a check for one million dollars!! The losers crowd the stage and hoist Jeff up as they chant his name. "I... I can't believe this! I won?! I won!! This is so awesome!!" an ecstatic Jeff said. Stefani applauded Jeff and clapped, "Congratulations, Jeff! You deserve it!" "Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! Jeff!" the losers chanted happily. Terry, then, ran up on stage to aid Stefani, "Hey there, winner." Stefani laughed, "What are you talking about? I lost." She looked at him, confused. Terry met her eyes, "Oh, believe me... you won." Terry looked longingly at her and proceeded to cornily kiss Stefani. Their kiss lasted a while, but was interrupted by cheers for Jeff. "Yay!!!" everyone cheered and hollered for Jeff, who was seen kissing Katherine. Chris made his way back on the stage as the losers put Jeff back on his feet, "Once again, congratulations to our Total Drama 101 winner: Jeff! Congratulations, Jeff, I am proud to award you this diploma and the final key of survival: the final Golden A+ award. Cherish it always!" Chris handed Jeff his diploma and the Final Golden A+. "And now," Chris announced. "It is my even bigger honor... to award you a check for ONE. MILLION. DOLLARS!" Chris handed the check to Jeff. Jeff took the check and kissed it, smiling. He, then, looked around to see everyone's smiling faces. "I have... all of you to thank for this! This is... this is great!" Jeff said.

Chris laughed, "Almost like you owe them!" "'Almost... like I owe... them'," Jeff said to himself, as his smile began to tilt. "Well," Chris walked off-screen and to the entrance of the school. "it looks like that's the end of that! From Chef Hatchet, the producers, and our winner, Jeff, I am Chris McLean! And this has been Total! Drama! 1-- "Wait!!" Jeff shouted and ran over to Chris. "What?!" Chris looked at him. "We already gave you the money! What else could you want?" Jeff looked at the camera, then to all the losers who were still smiling, and then back to Chris, "I think I'm gonna be the obvious 'hero-type' here." "What do you mean, man? You're speakin' crazy." "I can't take this... It can't be over yet. All of this! I don't want it to end quite yet!" "Well, I think you're about 25 episodes too late to tell me that, bro," Chris told him. "Anyway, I--" At that point, Chris received a phone call from a TD101 producer. "Chris here! ... Uh-huh. Yeah. Yeaaaaaaah. Oooooh! Okay! Wait, no. ... No. Uh-huh. Oh, okay. I see, I see! YEAH! Gotcha!" Chris hung up the phone. "Well, Jeff, you may possibly be in luck! My producers tell me that there is actually a lot of money in our budget that was dedicated towards our producers that they don't actually need. Yeah, they're speaking crazy, too, if you ask me. But that's what they told me. Anyway, they're going with the contingency plan with that money. They're demolishing this school and the mansion you guys stayed in!" "What!?" everyone shouted out. "Yep! And somewhere in the middle of scenic nowhere is a run-down mall that they're going to try to revamp just a little bit and help out that forsaken city to--" Chris stopped in his tracks. "Hmm... Let me make a quick call, be right back!" Chris ran off-screen and called another producer.

Jeff looked back at everyone else. "Why can't you just take the money and be happy!?" Katherine angrily said to him. "Katherine, think about it. What is a bum like me going to do with a million dollars!? Better yet, what am I gonna do after this show is over? I'm not ready for life yet!!" Chris ran back, "Alright, you guys are gonna love this. I need Jeff and everyone who has been Team Jeff this entire time to report to this spot! Front and center! Jeff, Liz, Samantha, Nalyd, Lilie, Carter, Tammi, Alyssa, Katherine, Ryan, and Terry walked over to where Chris was standing. "This everyone?" Chris asked and began counting, "There's 12 of you guys. PERFECT!" "Perfect for what?" Nalyd wondered. "Congratulations!!" "Oh, no," Ryan whispered to himself. "You lucky 12 individuals have been selected by our TD101 producers to compete in the next season of Total! Drama!" "Oh, please, no," Ryan was talking to himself more. Chris continued, "Total Drama isn't ready to end yet and we want to continue the tradition with you guys! We can't do a super-huge season like this one just ended... we don't have that much money left over. LOTS of mouths to feed. So, we're going to try a shorter one! With 12 lucky individuals--i.e. you guys!!" Chris looked over at the remaining 8, "As for the rest of you, your journey will end here! But, not to worry, you guys will be watching in the always-entertaining Aftermath segments!" "What!?" Ariel shrieked out. "But, I wanna be in the next season!" "Well, we can't always get what we want, now, can we?" Chris told him. Ryan screamed, "Do we even get a say in this!?" Carter added on, "Yeah, I don't need this show! I'm already rich!"

Chris pulled out a megaphone to Ryan and Carter, "Oh, yeah?! Richer than TEN. MILLION. DOLLARS!?" Carter's eyes turned into dollar signs, "T-t-t-ten mi-million dollars?" "Ten. Million. Dollars." Chris repeated. "Wait a minute," Liz asked. "I thought you just said your budget wasn't that big!" "Okay, so you DON'T want to compete and find out if you have a chance at this money!?" Liz shook her head, "I wanna compete! I wanna compete!!!" "I thought so... In the next couple of weeks, the 12 of you will have your minds changed foreva when you guys compete again for a check with your name on it! Jeff doesn't want this gravy train to end so we're not gonna let it!" "You bet!!" Jeff, then, reluctantly tore up the check Chris just gave him, causing everyone to gasp. "Keep your gasps in, everyone. We were gonna take it anyway, gosh," Chris assured everyone. "We'll see the 12 of you, the 8 of you losers, and more importantly, you, next time in our next season of Total Drama! We're going straight to the mall! See you next time on Total! Drama! Mall!! The camera faded to black one last time.

Color Code
NAME: This schoolmate was male.

NAME: This schoolmate was female.

PENCILS (MERGED): This schoolmate was placed on the team of the Screaming Pencils in the pilot episode (and made it past Episode 13, "Gym II: Hatchet's Revenge", where the teams merged).

PENS (MERGED): This schoolmate was placed on the team of the Killer Pens in the pilot episode (and made it past Episode 13, "Gym II: Hatchet's Revenge", where the teams merged).

WIN: This schoolmate won the challenge for his or her team (Episodes 1 - 12) or for himself or herself, individually (Episodes 13 - 24).

WIN: This schoolmate was on the challenge-winning team (Episodes 1 - 12).

IN: This schoolmate initially received a Hall Pass granting them Invincibility (Episodes 2 - 22).

IN: This schoolmate received a Golden A+ at the Detention Hall Ceremony.

LOW: This schoolmate was the last to receive a Golden A+ at the Detention Hall Ceremony.

LOW: This schoolmate did not receive a Golden A+ but remained in the game, due to a technicality.

OUT: This schoolmate did not receive a Golden A+ and was voted out of Total Drama 101.

OUT: This schoolmate did not receive a Golden A+ and was eliminated from Total Drama 101.

QUIT: This schoolmate did not receive a Golden A+ and voluntarily quit Total Drama 101.

OUT: This schoolmate came in second place in Total Drama 101.

WINNER: This schoolmate came in first place in Total Drama 101.

Elimination Descriptions
Brandon (The Screaming Pencils) – Voted off because he lost the Gym challenge for his team to Liz Chuck (The Killer Pens) - Voted off because he slept through each challenge Liz (The Killer Pens) - Voted off for being a big threat in the future in Ryan and Nalyd's eyes Gretel (The Killer Pens) - Voted off for separating herself from the team during the challenge Alyssa (The Screaming Pencils) - Voted off courtesy of her own alliance because of a rat incident earlier in the episode Nalyd (The Killer Pens) - Voted off because he lost the Music challenge for his team to Katherine Dedrek (The Killer Pens) - Voted off for being an annoyance and weak link to the Killer Pens Carter (The Screaming Pencils) - Eliminated along with Lilie due to threatening Chris after his team lost the Choir challenge Lilie (The Screaming Pencils) - Eliminated along with Carter due to Webby figuring out she was the contestant related to American business magnate Donald Trump (heard about from Terry’s Gossip Report in Chapter 4); Chris deemed this unfair Katherine (The Screaming Pencils) - Voted off for losing the Chemistry challenge for her team to Samantha Johnathan (The Killer Pens) - Voted off due to the effects of a Hall Pass (Ryan was originally chosen for elimination, however, due to the Hall Pass he received from his alliance member, Samantha, all votes for him were terminated.)

Webby (The Screaming Pencils - Merged) - Voted off due to the effects of a Hall Pass (Lilie gave Ryan her Hall Pass in exchange for entry into his alliance and control over Ryan's vote for that elimination ceremony for revenge as she knew everyone would vote for Ryan.) Zach (The Screaming Pencils - Merged) - Voted off because of Lilie's raised suspicion about being voted out next week by him, Jeff, and Katherine, even though it was a lie courtesy of Ryan and Tammi Samantha (The Killer Pens - Merged) - Eliminated due to quitting randomly for unknown reasons after losing the Parenting challenge, possibly to save her challenge-partner, Dedrek Ariel (The Screaming Pencils - Merged) - Voted off along with Dedrek because his computer game for the challenge lost for his team, courtesy of Ryan's virus Dedrek (The Killer Pens - Merged) - Voted off along with Ariel because he was accused of knocking out Chris's brother, Ace, with a bat, even though it was really Ryan Tammi (The Screaming Pencils - Merged) - Voted off due to being backstabbed by her co-alliance captain, Ryan, when she lost the Sexual Education challenge to him Terry (The Killer Pens - Merged) - Eliminated due to losing the Driver’s Education challenge by coming in first place and not listening to challenge instruction Lilie (The Screaming Pencils - Merged) - Voted off due to Nalyd's plan of setting off to get rid of all of Ryan's connections Nalyd (The Killer Pens - Merged) - Voted off after being backstabbed by Jeff and Stefani, courtesy of Katherine, who thought Nalyd was a stronger player than Ryan Ryan (The Killer Pens - Merged) - Eliminated due to losing the Politics sudden-death elimination challenge to Stefani. Katherine (The Screaming Pencils - Merged) - Eliminated due to having the least-thought-out clothing picked out for the Fashion Design challenge. Stefani (The Killer Pens - Merged) - Lost to Jeff during the Total Drama 101 Finale with a score of 130 to 110.

Credit

 * Ale-Alejandro
 * This user thought of the name for Chapter 24, "Classhin' for Fashion".
 * CD-TDA
 * This user thought of the challenge for Chapter 7, "A Classic Spain-venger Hunt".
 * This user thought of the name for Chapter 19, "Cease & Dissect".
 * This user thought of the challenge for Chapter 22, "Livin' on a Sprayer!", along with TotalDramaFan1000.
 * CrashMan 85
 * This user thought of the name for Chapter 16, "Computer Drips".
 * EzekielEsquire
 * This user thought of the name for this FanFiction, Total Drama 101.
 * Kgman04
 * This user thought of the name for Chapter 2, "Vanilla Warfare".
 * This user thought of the challenge for Chapter 2, "Vanilla Warfare".
 * This user thought of the name for Chapter 7, "A Classic Spain-venger Hunt".
 * This user thought of the name for Chapter 20, "Mach Seven".
 * This user thought of the name for Chapter 22, "Livin' on a Sprayer!".
 * Mygeto
 * This user thought of the name for Chapter 14, "Textbook Crooks".
 * This user thought of the challenge for Chapter 14, "Textbook Crooks".
 * This user thought of the name for Chapter 23, "Commander in Briefs".
 * This user thought of the challenge for Chapter 24, "Classhin' for Fashion".
 * Nalyd Renrut
 * This user thought of the name for Chapter 18, "I'm Bringin' Sex Ed Back".
 * TDADJ
 * This user thought of the challenge for Chapter 4, "McLean's Math Maze Meltdown".
 * This user thought of the challenge for Chapter 6, "Come Sing With Us", along with TotalDramaFan1000.
 * This user thought of the name for Chapter 9, "What Happens in Paris, Stays in Paris".
 * This user thought of the name for Chapter 11, "Code - ORANGE".
 * This user thought of the name for Chapter 12, "Ryan's Kitchen".
 * TDIFan13
 * This user created the name for the school that will be used throughout the FanFiction, "Gilded Glory High School".
 * This user thought of the recap and opening scenes for Chapter 15, "Baby, Baby, Baby, Nooooo!".
 * TheZobe
 * This user created the main logo for this FanFiction, Total Drama 101.
 * TotalDramaFan1000
 * This user thought of the challenge for Chapter 6, "Come Sing With Us, along with TDADJ.
 * This user thought of the challenge for Chapter 22, "Livin' on a Sprayer!", along with CD-TDA.

Goofs

 * An average raccoon cannot fit into a desk, but, in the Total Drama 101 theme song, a raccoon is seen popping out of a desk, along with a camera, which took up even more space.
 * In "Competition in the Air", Ryan claims to have lost the challenge, when, the opposite happened. Liz and his team, in fact, won the challenge.
 * In "Potato Prosecution", Chris states that Lilie, Jeff, and Zach would be competing for the Screaming Pencils; however, Ariel took Lilie's spot when it came to actually fighting.
 * In "Gym II - Hatchet's Revenge", Chris states that three gentleman were brought back into the game. Dedrek, Lilie, and Nalyd were the schoolmates brought back into the competition.  Lilie is a female, contradicting what Chris said.
 * This could have also been an Author's goof by Bbhinton15, as the people that were going to be brought back initially were Carter, Dedrek, and Nalyd.
 * In "Econo-moron-ics", Chris listed all the competitors who didn't make it to the final six. However, he included Nalyd, Lilie, and Katherine, who all returned and made it as one of the six finalists.