User blog:Rhonda the stalker fan!/July's News Report :P

'''XD I was suppose to get this up a few days ago, but I got sick with something nasty. Trust me, you don't want to know...'''

'''Anyone, this is a news report that is much or less parodying News and giving stuff up what has happened this month :P I'm not sure why I wrote this but it was fun :3 So feel free to read it, it is not a update on any of my stories. It does feature some characters from my stories and Total Drama Canon as reporters. It's also not meant to be offensive.'''

News
"Welcome to What The Heck News," a redheaded girl greets. "I'm Jenny and this is my sidekick Toby."

"I'm your co-anchor," A blonde boy replies.

"Same thing," Jenny replies. "We are here to give you news, because...why are we doing this?"

"Beats me," Toby replies.

"Whatever, we will probably have to do worse things," Jenny states. "Anyway, we are going over the news of this past month, June!"

"Were talking about July," Toby states.

"YOUR MOM!" Jenny shouts. "Anyway, this past month some stuff happened."

"You don't say," Toby replies.

"The jokes on you because I did say," Jenny replies. "Anyway, this month NASA launched a new Mars Rover. They even broadcasted the landing in Time Square."

"For those of you who like Jenny who don't know what Mars is," Toby states. "It is another planet, a small reddish one. In other news, ladies all over have been severely disappointed, because King Jong Un has gotten married."

"Isn't he the leader of South Korea?" Jenny asks.

"North," Toby replies.

"As if you even know the difference between North and South!" Jenny replies.

"Please," Toby replies. "You still have to make your fingers into Ls to till the difference between left and right."

"YOUR MOM!" Jenny shouts.

...

"So are you going to start going over another story?" Toby asks.

"No," Jenny replies. "Those were the only headlines I looked up."

"You only looked up two major stories?" Toby asks.

"You expected me to do more?" Jenny asks.

"True," Toby replies. "I had too much faith in your competence. What was I thinking?"

Jenny laughs. "Like you think, you are a true textbook example of an idiot."

"You would know about idiots," Toby replies.

"YOUR MOM!" Jenny shouts.

Politics
"Onto politics," Jenny states. "In American, presidential elections are just around the corner. Whether you are rooting for donkeys or elephants to take office, it is the reporter's opinion that we would better off if we elected a Gull to office."

Economy
"And news about the economy," Jenny states. "It sucks. If you didn't know that, you probably are an idiot. Like our sports reporter."

Sports
"Now onto news about sports," Jenny states. "The Olympics have started. To give us more on this, is our own sports reporter who is all the way in London! She's a blonde headed bobbie, it's Lindsay. Lindsay, what is going on at the Olympics?"

"They're in Paris," Lindsay replies.

"No there being held in London," Toby replies.

"Oh, then I should be there!" Lindsay states.

"Ok Lindsay, what are people saying about the Olympics in London?" Jenny asks.

"I don't know, they are speaking some foreign language!" Lindsay replies. "I wish they spoke English."

"Who has won the most medals so far?" Toby asks.

"Medals are suuuuuuuuuuch bad accessories," Lindsay states. "I prefer bandannas."

"Lindsay what is ten times ten?" Jenny asks.

"Twenty da!" Lindsay replies.

The two anchors facepalm.

"At least she added correctly," Toby states. "Thanks for the update Lindsay, we will see you see soon."

"Bye Tony, bye Jelly!" Lindsay says. "See you soon!"

"Not too soon I hope," Jenny states.

Entertainment
"And now onto what is happening in the entertainment industry," Toby states. "Rapper Snoop Dogg changed his name to Snoop Lion."

"Is it too much to ask for singers with normal names?" Jenny asks. "In other news, pop star Selena Gomez got bangs. And apparently that is news. That people actually care about."

"And Kristen Stewart is in the news too," Toby replies. "She has had an affair while she was dating Robert Pattinson."

"Was it with a werewolf?" Jenny asks.

"No, that is stupid," Toby replies. "Why would you think that?"

"Well they were in Twilight so I just assumed," Jenny replies.

"They were in other things than Twilight," Toby replies.

"Does anyone remember them?" Jenny asks.

...

"EXACTLY!" Jenny shouts.

Wiki
“And now onto wiki news,” Toby states. “With the leave of beloved user and bureaucrat admin Sprinklemist, talk of new admins is in the air.”

“Other bureaucrat admin Reddy has made a blog of possible new admins,” Jenny explains. “Many comments have been left on said blog and it seems to be a big topic of discussion on the wiki. Here for their take on the big news is What The Heck News’ own reporter Julie Noforthwal…”

 Julie's News Report 

Total Drama Fanfiction Wiki. My home and yours. So it is no surprise that we want good leaders for the wiki. Admins are those that we put are trust in. My friend Reddy has suggested three people who could be admin. They are said to be nice, kind, friendly users who are good, trustworthy people.

…Or are they? This reporter is skeptic and did some digging. And what I initially found may shock you. They are shadier than a nun, which is saying something. Because nuns are really shady.

Let’s start with BrunoSomebody. Often described as a fun-loving user, who writes a good story and draws fantastic arts. But one user claims that BrunoSomebody stole their ice cream cone! And this reporter can only imagine that Bruno punched said user to steal said ice cream cone, because it’s a funny image to imagine.

Then there is User:JustLittleOlMe. Called a nice, kind, motherly but fun user, with talented writer and a love for feathery friends. Or so she appears.

But when user says, “I’m fine with any user as long as it isn’t that weird Jay >_>” Said user also said “JK” after that and made statement in front of Jay, but I’m not going to mention that fact.

And then there is Bbhinton15. Described as a mature user who is also a nice and fun guy. But there are claims that BB is going to college. Clearly that is a major problem. Quimberly forbid we have leaders with a college education!

Still, I decided I need more information. So I decided to talk to these users and ask them some questions. The hard-hitting kind. Like a nun, because nuns hit. HARD.

Interviews (In script format because it is easier)

My Interview BrunoSomebody

Julie: “How do you feel about being considered for adminship?”

Bruno: “Awesomely Great :D”

Julie: “Interesting… What do you think is your biggest contribution to the wiki so far?”

''Bruno: “Hmm…Doing art requests, maybe. :P”'' I '''couldn’t deny this kid was a good artist. But you know who else was a good artist? Vincent Van Gogh. And he cut his ear off. Would Bruno have a breakout from adminship troubles and cut his own ear off? Probably not…'''

Julie: “What’s your favorite color?” 

Bruno: “Red…and no, Reddy is not my favorite user.”

Julie: “I don’t blame you :P”

Julie: “How do you respond to claims that you have an obsession with Chelsey?”

Bruno: “xD”

Bruno: “They’ll never be as awesome as Chelsey :P”

'''I had to admit Bruno was right. I mean have you seen her scarf? Where can I find that scarf? I want scarf…''' Julie: “What about claims that you stole an ice cream cone?”

Bruno: ' '"I didn't..."

Bruno: "OKAY, THAT WAS ME! >.>"

Bruno: "SORRY!"

Julie: “I knew it >:D BEST REPORTER EVER!”

'''I told you! What now?'''

Julie: “If you were standard on an island, what three objects would you want to have?”

Bruno: "Fried chicken, unicorns, and a Rebecca Black voodoo doll."

T'''hat was a smart answer. Ok, I’ll admit this kid knows stuff. I mean who wouldn’t want a unicorn? Though unicorns is technically more than one object. But it is such an awesome answer so I let it slide.'''

Julie: “How do you feel about nuns?”

Bruno: "Hmm... there's this Whoopi Goldberg movie where she becomes a nun. xD”

'''True. Whoopi was a pretty good nun, if not at the least musical. She was better than The Sound Of Music Lady at the least.'''

Julie: One final question Mr. Bruno; If appointed admin, what would you do?”

''Bruno: “I'll help users, and contribute to a better wiki. :3”''

''Julie: “I see. Thank you Mr. Bruno, and good luck with becoming an admin.”''

'''Ok this kid got me. He has convinced he is a good choice for admin. I give him the Julie Seal Of Purple Approval.''' Interview with JustLittleOlMe

Julie: “How do you feel about being an admin?”

Jay: “It's the most amazing thing ever!!”

''Jay: “I've got all this massive power I can use selfishly now! >:D”''

Jay: “LOL, jk, jk,” 

'''Was she Jking? I wasn’t so sure…'''

Jay: “Seriously, though, I've got to train myself to use it (her admin power). Watching and doing are two different things.”

''Jay: “:D I absolutely adore <3 it! It's fun!! ''

Jay: :D”

''Julie: “I see. What do you think is your biggest contribution to the wiki so far is?”''

''Jay: “Hmmmm…Excellent question! ''

Jay: The massive amount of friendships, I think 

Jay: But also

''Jay: The brand new story venue--Animal POV! :D”''

'''Good answer. Her stories are good. Plus pretty ponies say friendship is magic. And if you can’t believe pretty ponies who can you believe? Certainly not those nuns! Dirty nuns…'''

Julie: “Good answer :P What’s your favorite color?"

Jay: “Hmmm….

Jay: “Depends on how I feel at the time, but usually a lavender purple.”

Julie: “That is a great answer :D”

Jay:  ” Or Royal Purple sometimes, too.”

Julie: “Anything purple is awesome <3”

I love any shade of purple. ''Julie: “It has been said that you like animals? Is this true?”''

''Jay: “>_> ? ''

Jay: <_< Who said that?

Jay: xDDD”

Jay: “Animals are awesome to watch, and incredible to know.

Jay: My dog and our backyard squirrel were friends when they didn't think people were watching.

Jay: I wish I'd gotten a photo of them nose to nose one time.”

Ok, that is adorable. So, so adorable.

Julie: “If you could be any animal what animal would you be?”

Jay: “At certain times, I'd like to be different creatures.

Jay: I would love to be an albatross.

Jay: Or a Gull.

Jay: But I think it would be wonderful to be one of those diving birds or a dog or cat, too (domestic).”

Hmm. A good answer. But according to a third rate asking website in which any one can answer, an albatross can ''“sometimes be used metaphorically to mean a psychological burden that feels like a curse. It is an allusion to Samuel Taylor Coleridge's poem The Rime of the Ancient Mariner (1798).”''

Julie: “If you were standard on an island, what three objects would you want to have?”

Jay: “Wow!

Jay: Ummm…

Jay: A knife and knife sharpener with a sheath and holder.

Jay: That's one.

Jay: A shelter, like a tent.

Jay: I'd want antibiotics.

Jay: Like a first aid kit.

Jay: Yup.

Jay: Knife, tent, and first aid kit.”

Smart choices Jay. Though I was a bit technical about all the things with the knife making it a total of over three objects. The response followed;

Jay: “Well, if you have a knife, do you always have to carry it?”

Jay: Or can you wear it on your belt?

Jay: Or have it inside your purse?

Jay: But it can't be allowed to get dull or slice you up while you're not using it.

Jay: And you have to be able to care for it.

Jay: Like hunting knives, which I don't have, come with oil and a sharpening stone

Jay: Don't worry!

Jay: I'm just being detailed about it.”

''Julie: “I see your point. Good at defending your point. Very admin like.''

Jay: “:D

Jay: Thank You.”

''Julie: “Your welcome Jay. Now how do you feel about nuns?”''

Jay: “The nuns that I've met have been very nice.”

Julie: “Hmm...>_>”

Jay: “I've heard awful things about them from kids that have been in Catholic schools, tho.

Jay: But I figure most of them are very kind.” '''So we have a difference policy on nuns. Just as long as she doesn’t underestimate those nuns.'''

Julie: “So, final question Mrs. Jay.

Julie: If appointed admin, what would you do?”

Jay: “I'd learn what and how to be a good admin from Gid and anyone here willing to teach me.

Jay: I know some from watching Gid

Jay: But I need to know how to do it without making mistakes

Jay: Because mistakes will cause hard feelings.”

''Julie: Ah yes, Gid my fourth wall father. I agree very much with what you are saying.''

She gave a very smart answer. I trust her to do the right thing with her power. And trust her to learn from my fourth wall father.

…If he is my fourth wall father does that mean I was just interviewing my mom? '''…So Jay passes as a good admin in my opinion. She gets the Julie Seal Of Purple Approval. But what about this BB guy?'''  Interview with Bbhinton15 

Julie: “How do you feel about being an admin?”

BB: ' ”'''Well, it won't be a BRAND new experience for me. I'm pretty psyched for it if it happens. If I get chosen for promotion, I'll help out in serving the wiki users in any way I can possible.”''

Julie: “Good to hear.

Julie: What do you think is your biggest contribution to the wiki so far is?”

''BB: “Well, as I speak, I am two chapters away from finishing my second general fanfiction (first competition fanfiction), Total Drama 101. It's currently in the 6th longest page on the Wiki due to its lengthy chapters and detail. I would think that's my biggest contribution.”''

'''Sounds like a good read. And I know a think or two about lenthgy stories.'''

''Julie: “Sounds like a big contribution. Now, what’s your favorite color?”''

''BB: “In general, my favorite color is Blue. If I need to be more specific, my favorite shade of blue is Navy. :3”''

''Julie: “No that is fine. Some sources say you are to going college soon. Is this true?”''

''BB: “Yes, I'll be going to college. I'll be leaving August 1st for training for my new job on-campus. Classes don't start until the 20th, however.”''

''Julie: “I see. Do you feel going to college affects whether you should be an admin or not?''

BB:' ”'''Yes, I do... I feel as if that reason is what is deterring others from thinking I'd be an admin. The only thing I know for sure is that my time on the wiki will get a little limited due to my classes, like anyone that has to resume school activities.”''

T'''hat is a good point. I mean most users as kids cause this a wiki dedicated writings from fans at a show aimed at kids…so some people are going to school.'''

Julie: “I see your point.”

Julie: “If you were standard on an island, what three objects would you want to have?”

BB: “The Sensible Object: My cell phone for communication purposes.

''BB: The Honest Object: My iPod for music... I'd get bored soooo easily.''

''BB: The Sucking-Up Object: My Laptop, so I could work on more fanfictions offline. c:”''

Julie: “Hmm, good choices

Julie: How do you feel about nuns?”

BB: “Hmmm...

BB:I feel like nuns are powerless without rulers and dictators WITH them.

''BB: There should be a balance! D:<''

BB: :3”

Finally, someone gets it!

Julie:' ''' ” ...That is true brilliance. I salute you :)”''

''BB: “Thank you very much, Julie. I want a world where nuns don't have to be dictators! A great world, a genuine world, a... a... a BETTER WORLD. <3”''

Julie: “;( Finally, someone understands. :3 Bless you.

Julie: Now my final question was, “If appointed admin, what would you do?" But you have answered that in the first question. Anything you would like to elaborate on the matter?

BB: “Since I feel as if not all of the wiki knows me, the first thing I would do is make a blog stating what has happened and to introduce myself accordingly.

''BB: Currently, I'm working on a way to make sure most of the wiki at least knows my username, perhaps through a game of some sort; maybe that will come into existence after potentially becoming an admin. The possibilities are endless, Julie, ENDLESS.”''

''Julie: “You...are a genius man. A genius. I wish you good luck in becoming admin BB. You will save this country!”''

''BB: “Thank you, ma'am. I will do everyone proud! Today, the wiki... tomorrow, the world!”''

… :3 I think his words speak for himself. He gets The Julie Seal Of Purple Approval...

...In this reporter’s opinion, these people will do a fine job. And if you still aren’t convinced then think about like this. There are worse choices.

“Thank you Julie,” Toby replies back in the newsroom. “BrunoSomebody is currently writing Total Drama: Paradise Falls, JustLilOlMe is currently writing The Beasts of Wawanakwa and BBhinton15 is currently writing Total Drama 101.”

Closing
"And now we would like to end this report with a quote from this wiki," Jenny states. "Goodnight."

''"Try as I may, I am but a flawed human being, unlike the Gull." -Frank15''