Talk:Total Drama What The Heck?

Warning Spoilers Ahead!

Polls
Which Team is your favorite? Team Indestructible The Bulldogs The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice (aka the Fun Bunch)

What previous competing contestant was your favorite? Collin LeShawna Justin Taylor Duncan

How much did you like Chapter 9, on a scale of 1 to 5? 5 stars, I loved it! 4 stars, it was good. 3 stars, it was passable. 2 stars, I didn't like it that much. 1 star, I hated it!

Who do you think will lose the challenge? Team Indestructible The Bulldogs The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice

What was your favorite part of the chapter? Geoff's news to Bridgette Nate solving the mystery Barbie talking Rosamond on her own The Fun Bunch saves the girl scouts Team Indestructible's search Barbie and Cosmic River's talk

What's your opinion on Nate? I like him! He's ok. Need more time to say... Rosamond x Nate! Hate him. Who?

Did you like Barbie finally talking? Yes No

Which shipping do you support? Purple Hair! Julie X Sierra forever! Fun Duo! Nellie x Sierra forever! Purple Rain! Julie x Nellie forever! Is this seriously a question?

Are you excited for part 2? Yes No

What do you want to know most? Who said hello to Rosamond? Why Nellie is mistrusting? What Team Indestructible will run into? What The Bulldogs found? What decision will Cosmic River make; side with Bradley or Barbie? Where are Jenny and Toby? What is in the crate?

Favorite Old Contestant
Like the little preview says this show will have old contestants (the 26 or so contestants seen in TDI, TDA or TDWT). Please comment here who you would like to see. Only vote for one contestant. Like stated above you may vote for any contestant the original 22 campers, Sierra, Alejandro, Blainley or even Mr. Coconut. If you have anyone else please ask here and I'll decide. Thank You. Hiding Oreos in her bra. 03:00, April 23, 2011 (UTC)

GWEN! I hope it&#39;s candy! Or a whole bunch of shoes! Or shoes made of candy! 03:25, April 23, 2011 (UTC)

Noah. -w- &quot;I once saw him juggle a baby, a bowling ball, and an olive. It was made extra hard because the baby pooped.&quot; 12:36, April 23, 2011 (UTC)

Courtney! In my own little word, they all know me there... 00:31, April 27, 2011 (UTC)

Voting ends Monday!!! Last Of The Gophers!!! 22:56, May 20, 2011 (UTC)

I changed my mind. Voting is over. All 3 made it! I'll post all the old contestants on the page soon... Last Of The Gophers!!! 03:57, May 21, 2011 (UTC)

Original Contestant
I would like to use two original characters (designed by users) for the story. I will choose one boy and one girl. You may submit up to 2 characters (a boy and a girl) but I will only choose one of them. Use this format to enter your character. If you have any questions please leave them on my talkpage. I will try to write the characters best according to the guidelines you set out. Here is the format:

Name: Name

User: Username or signature

Stereotype: Goth, Cheerleader, Jock, Punk, etc.

Look: Clothes, Hair Color, and or Style, Eye Color, Skin Tone and anything else you think you need to put in.

Basic Description: Like something that maybe used for a bio (it does not have to be that long if you don't want it to be. Make it as long as you wish) or to help understand the character better so I know how to write for him or her.

Thank you, Rhonda

Name: SG

User: Shadowgeoff

Stereotype: The Shy Technopath

Look: The pic you see to the right.

Description: SG was always quite the shy person. He has only interacted with a few people from school, and is somewhat isolated at home. He feels much more comfortable talking to people online, as it "breaks the borders of speech, appearence, and you don;t have to tell anyone your own issues."

Name: Jessica

User: Omg.Chacha In my own little word, they all know me there... 00:31, April 27, 2011 (UTC)

Stereotype: The Smarty Pants

Look: Wears a pink shirt, jean capris, has long auburn hair, short in height, brown eyes, olive-ish skin tone. (not sure how to describe)

Basic Description: Jessica is just one of those girls, where after you talk to her, you feel like you need to locate the nearest dictionary. Jessica is a proud enforcer of rules, and likes to remind people that she's in charge. Even though she may come across as overbearing, she really is trying to help, and be a good person. Jessica is auditioning for Total Drama What The Heck because she wants to leave her mark on the world, and what better way than to be on TV? (P.S. I'm new to this so I'm very sorry if I did anything wrong!)

Congrats to ShadowGeoff and Omg.Chaca! You win! Hiding Oreos in her bra. 15:25, May 13, 2011 (UTC)



Chat
We all probably know what this is. Anyway I'd like to yay I finally did something. Any questions or comments (unless related to above categories) may be posted here. Thank You. Hiding Oreos in her bra. 03:05, April 23, 2011 (UTC)

OMG. I'm not the only one who has trouble with headings! :D XD Sorry, Rhonda. I hope it&#39;s candy! Or a whole bunch of shoes! Or shoes made of candy! 02:55, April 23, 2011 (UTC)

Yay, looking forward to this. I hope it's good. :3 &quot;I once saw him juggle a baby, a bowling ball, and an olive. It was made extra hard because the baby pooped.&quot; 12:36, April 23, 2011 (UTC)]

Thanks SG and Toad. I hope its good too. Hiding Oreos in her bra. 19:54, April 23, 2011 (UTC)

My favorite newbies are Barbie and Cosmic River. Barbie cuz I generally like Goth characters and Cosmic River cuz it's a cool nam. XD Also, I counted, and it seems the old contestants have 13 people while the newbies have 12. Is there a reason for this or is it just a goof? -- Spotted at the hottest shows, interview on Charlie Rose,  they all want a piece of you!  12:02, May 21, 2011 (UTC)

XD I didn't notice. It might have to do with fan contest. See Gwen, Courtney and Noah were all going to be in it. But I forgot about Noah. So I thought he was the 13 one. I wanted an uneven amount for... a reason but then I realized Noah was in it so I decided not to. But after checking over a blog post I realized someone had voted for Sierra so I decided to add her. I probably should have added a male newbie but I was really tired so I forgot. I'm not going to do it now as I think uneven will do fine and I don't have any ideas XD. Last Of The Gophers!!! 18:57, May 21, 2011 (UTC)

Wow! That was awesome! I liked the chapter, now a little critique on the newbies. Julie annoyed me at first, but I was glad when the rabdomness was toned down a bit. Collin, I could truly hear his annoying voice. XD But my favorite newbies of all, now that I've read, has GOT to be Rosamond. XD I had such a great picture of her! And BeetleJuice made me laugh. XD overall, keep up the good work! -- Spotted at the hottest shows, interview on Charlie Rose,  they all want a piece of you!  04:00, May 23, 2011 (UTC)

XD!!!!!!!!! Thanks for the comment Reddy. Julie is very random and I tried to tune it down but it was really the rhyming that made her less random. I'm glad you don't like Collin. And I'm very happy you like Rosamond. She is my favorite character from Nate The Great and that book was very close to me in my childhood. I loved her cats too! Thanks for reading and thanks for doing the pics! Last Of The Gophers!!! 04:20, May 23, 2011 (UTC)

I love Ronda! "I said no cussing!" That cracked me up. You have a great way of keeping things light and fun without making them seem childish. I love the part when Julie goes "Too much Bee Gees!" If you would like I can draw up some character designs for new characters.Omg.Chacha is mah name, being sarcastic is mah game! 16:30, May 23, 2011 (UTC)


 * D! Thank You Chacha. I'm glad you think it's funny but not childish. I'm glad you thought Julie was funny. She was a joy to write for! And I'm glad you like Rhonda. I love her too XD And thank you for offering to draw some character designs but Reddy is going to do them. He has done Jovi and Rosamond! Last Of The Gophers!!! 23:25, May 23, 2011 (UTC)

I loved the first chapter, Rhonda! SG reminded me of myself IRL, of course. Chef being a contestant was a good idea and I'm glad you went with it. The song was pretty funny, and not half bad. :) Keep on writing TDWTH?, and I'll keep writing TD:PB! :P My name is Sierra-Cody now. It&#39;s hyphenated. 01:33, May 24, 2011 (UTC)

XD I tried to do SG as well as I could. I love Chef as a contestant and I loved writing the song! And on us writing our fanfcis; I wouldn't have it any other way (if that makes sense X3) Last Of The Gophers!!! 02:46, May 24, 2011 (UTC)

You've got a promising start, Rhonda. There are some grammatical/word choice stumbles, but polish will come with practice. Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I-- 04:29, May 24, 2011 (UTC)

Thank You Gideon! I things will only get better from here! I have never had god grammer and have had trouble expressing what I mean in words but I hope I improve. Last Of The Gophers!!! 05:16, May 24, 2011 (UTC)

Sorry I haven't done anything. I haven't given up but have been on a field trip for around 6 days and have had no computer acsess till now and am too tired to write. I hope to have it up by late tomorrow. Last Of The Gophers!!! 03:13, June 1, 2011 (UTC)

New chapter up! Finally XD. Three things I'd like to make clear. One I forgot to name teams so that will be done in Chapter 3. Two Do you guys think the words are too close? If so does anyone know how to fix that. Three if you that the ...... are short that is because I tried making them really long but they just stretched out in one HUGE line. Anyone who knows why and can help me please tell me! Last Of The Gophers!!! 03:41, June 29, 2011 (UTC)

Wow, I really liked the chapter! I got a little confused by it, though. It was really funny, especially Rosamond's cats. XD Rhonda and the AI judges were hilarious as well, and I loved the elimination because I hated Collin. SG was awesome, as always. :P XD The alliances were interesting, and I want to see how they do in teams. Can't wait for more, Rhonda! :D Ugh! This latte&#39;s cold! You&#39;re fired! 04:20, June 29, 2011 (UTC)

Rhonda, others have been having the same formatting problem as you. It looks like the wiki's rich text editor is introducing a bunch of extraneous formatting information when you paste in text from word processing software. Once it's in, all you can do is strip it out manually. (Switch to Source mode to see the unwanted formatting code.) To avoid getting all this formatting crap, switch the Edit window to Source mode before pasting. After you've pasted in your text, you can switch back to WYSIWYG mode (i.e. the rich text editor) if you want, and do any additional cleanup/refinement there before posting your edit.

Note, however, that Source mode handles spacing differently from WYSIWYG mode. Double-spaced paragraphs (i.e. one blank line between paragraphs) in Source mode becomes single spacing (actually, space-and-a-half spacing, which is what you want) in WYSIWYG mode; triple- or quadruple-spacing (i.e. 2 or 3 blank lines between paragraphs) in Source mode becomes double spacing in WYSIWYG; 4 or 5 blank lines in Source becomes triple spacing in WYSIWYG, etc. If you paste single-spaced paragraphs (i.e. only a line break, with no blank lines) into Source mode, the line breaks will be lost when you post, and you'll get a Wall of Text. Note also that, if you paste in Source mode, any italics and/or boldface in your original text may be lost, in which case you'll have to put that back in manually. Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I-- 05:08, June 29, 2011 (UTC)

I'm glad you liked the new chapter ShadowGeoff. If you got confused on something I don't blame you. I find the two things that bugged me most about this chapter was the fight scenes and the dialogue. The dialogue is funny but ending it with Rhonda says or such always confuses me because always write in script format (ex. Rhonda: blah blah). The fight scenes were hard to describe whether they were with monkeys or on the pedestal. It also lacked dialogue so it was kinda of harder to feel the mood I guess. If thats not what you got confused on please tell me so I can make sure I don't do it again. And thanks Gideoncrawle. I understand what your saying and I'm going to try it next time. I appreciate it very much! I think this might eliminate most if not all my problems with formatting. Last Of The Gophers!!! 16:57, June 29, 2011 (UTC)

I haven't commented yet? XD I read Chapter 3 a few days ago, but forgot to comment. I really liked how things go interesting with Gwen trying to tear Julie and SG apart. LeShawna's okay, but rather her than Julie. :P The challenge would've made me really hungry if I hadn't eaten breakfast before reading it. XD The judges were really funny, especially their sarcastic comments to each other. Keep up the good work! :D I really like this story. :) Don't be a rainbow,  be a flag.  -Lady Gaga.  01:44, July 13, 2011 (UTC)

XD Thanks for commenting. Unfortunately Gwen's trick isn't over yet. I didn't wanna eliminate LeShawna just yet but I wanted a girl to go and felt she was the most expandable. I loved Jenny and Toby and think they'll make the aftermath more fun. I'm glad you love it! Baby could we make a home in the stars, Baby somewhere in a galaxy far, Ohh, ohhh, ohh you're my future love &lt;3 03:43, July 13, 2011 (UTC)

I just realized... The really long team name is a reference to a bunch of wiki stuff. xD O.o -- Spotted at the hottest shows, interview on Charlie Rose,  they all want a piece of you!  19:56, July 15, 2011 (UTC)
 * The Killer (Canon reference)
 * Kleptomaniacal (TDO reference)
 * Top Banana Bottom Feeding (TD:TAS reference)
 * Perci (TD:PB reference)
 * OVER 9000 (TDS/DBZ reference)
 * Muskies (LTDI reference)
 * of Goth Magical Whatnot (???)
 * Globetrotting Locusts (TDL reference)
 * Studded (TDS reference)
 * Jumping (TDO reference)
 * Lemmings (???)
 * MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice (TDL reference)

Speaking of wiki references, although Rhonda didn't mention it in the Notes, I wonder if Izzy's disappearance (Chapter 2) might be a Legacy reference. In both stories, Izzy is believed to rest in a watery grave, although her body was never recovered; and Rhonda previously stated her intent to include allusions to a lot of other wiki stuff. Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I-- 04:36, July 16, 2011 (UTC)

Although it probably wouldn't have affected the outcome, due to the teamwork aspect of the judging, the Bulldogs didn't make the best use of their talent. The smarter thing to do would have been to put D.J. and Hatchet--presumably the team's best cooks--on different courses, with one on the omelet and the other on the crepes. Also, the initial description of Jenny sounds a lot like Izzy. (Hmm, I wonder...) There were undoubtedly a number of wiki allusions that I didn't recognize, since I'm sure we haven't read all of the same stories, I liked the references to the Courtney-bashing genre and the origin of Sunny D. (It bears mention, though, that Sunshine and I are now in some agreement that that my own competition story tells the real story of how Sunny D came to be.)

A couple of technical tidbits. First, there are a couple of places where you have a speaker change without a paragraph break. Second, and more importantly, the first three chapters have a number of errors in word choice. For example, you once said "excepted" when you clearly meant "accepted", and "excepts" when you meant "suspects". There are also several cases of saying "except", when you meant "expect". Also, you sometimes use "your" (the possessive) when you mean "you're" (the contraction of "you are") and "were" when you meant "we're" (the contraction of "we are"). While some of these errors may stem from confusion over what the words mean, I suspect that other cases are simply typos, in which case you may be relying too heavily on your word processer's automatic spell checker. If the misspelled word is also a real word, the spell checker won't catch it, and the grammar checker usually won't catch it either. That said, this is still an entertaining story, and I plan to stick with it. Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I-- 05:28, July 17, 2011 (UTC)

XD I'm glad you caught on to the team name. Goth is for Total Drama Tourism which had a team Goth plus I love goth characters. Magical Whatnot is the name of a team in Total Drama Culture. Lemmings came from one of Omg.Chacha's stories I was planning on reading but haven't done yet. And you were right Gideon, Izzy's death was an allusion to Legacy but I must have forgot to mention it in trivia. I was originally going to make her death the exact same as in Legacy but I don't know why I didn't. I see what you mean about DJ and Chef cooking different dishes but if they did they wouldn't have bonded and Chef wouldn't have apologized so they had to. Plot always trumps reason and sense! I thought you'd like the Courtney bashing stories. XD I loved that preview about Sunny and Duncan. I'm sorry they're so many grammer mistakes. I will fix them. XD It's funny because in the next chapter Rhonda was going to type and Julie was going to be watching over her shoulder and nit picking about it including her grammer. I'm glad you'll stick with it. I hope for it to get better. I also am hoping to have some television trope & idiom allusions and things that would fit certain tropes in the story as well. Baby could we make a home in the stars, Baby somewhere in a galaxy far, Ohh, ohhh, ohh you're my future love &lt;3 07:07, July 18, 2011 (UTC)

Winner Guessing Contest
Vote for who you think will win! Winner can choose someone to compete next time or make their own plus choose a contestant for an all star season if I ever get that far. XD Just put your signature or name next to the name of the contestant you want to win. You may only vote once.

Barbie- Reddy took mine, too, and SG already picked SG. Barbie's an underdog, and revenge shall be sweet! JustLittleOlMe Lil   Jay JLOM   Mrs. Gideon  23:16, October 4, 2011 (UTC)

Bradley- Gwen is SO overrated!! 02:30, August 10, 2011 (UTC)

Bridgette- Reddy took mine. :P --<font color="#00008B">HINT:A AWESOME USER, <font color="#D2691E">that loves Chatango and Chatting but wonders, <font color="#00FFFF">what's with Cyan? 02:20, August 10, 2011 (UTC)

Chef-Just for the lulz.:P <font color="Orange">Got it memorized? <font color="Green">Got what memorized?  <font color="Orange">I have no idea.  19:26, May 26, 2011 (UTC)

Collin-

Cody-

Cosmic River- Hippie Luv!  Being spotted by the paparazzi  It's Lindsay, not from TD!  16:37, July 28, 2011 (UTC)

Courtney- If a canon character wins, it'll probably be her. And she'll have earned it! Frank15 06:00, October 4, 2011 (UTC)

DJ-

Duncan-

Geoff-

Gwen-

Heather- I wanted to pick a OC, but Julie and CR already pick. And Heather's my fav TD. Bruno!  Talk!   Editcount!  00:14, September 29, 2011 (UTC)

Jovi-Omg.Chacha is mah name, being sarcastic is mah game! 16:27, May 23, 2011 (UTC)

Julie- I like girls who are hot hot hot  <font color="Blue">better than girls who are not not not  14:16, May 30, 2011 (UTC)

Justin-

LeShawna-

Lindsay-

Mikey-

Nate-

Noah-

Nellie- <font color="Red">Jake:  Breathe, Feel, Love   Life  03:34, October 3, 2011 (UTC)

Rosamond--- Spotted at the hottest shows, interview on Charlie Rose,  they all want a piece of you!  11:37, May 23, 2011 (UTC)

SG- :P My name is Sierra-Cody now. It&#39;s hyphenated. 01:33, May 24, 2011 (UTC)

Sierra- TDAddict  - You know who he is,  and don't forget it. 22:39, May 26, 2011 (UTC)

Taylor-

Trent- EnTrey likes peanut butter.

Final 3 Guessing Contest
List the names of who you think will be in the final 3. Whoever gets it right or closest (If I can determine that) will win. The winner gets the same prize for winning the winner guessing contest. You may change guesses and or guess again if you get it wrong. Leave your signature or name next to your guess.

SG, Jovi, Rosamond. Ugh! This latte&#39;s cold! You&#39;re fired! 03:32, June 8, 2011 (UTC)

SG, Heather, and Cosmic River  Being spotted by the paparazzi  It's Lindsay, not from TD!  16:38, July 28, 2011 (UTC)

Jovi, Julie, and Chef: for no other reason than because those three are my favorites that this point. Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I--  00:03, July 30, 2011 (UTC)

Barbie, Chef and Mikey <font color="DarkMagenta">It's fun to spray yourself with mace, it's fun to squeeze your mother's face, it's fun to mow your daddy's grass, it's fun to break things made of glass!  02:23, August 10, 2011 (UTC)

Jovi, Bradley, and Chef Gwen is SO overrated!! 02:30, August 10, 2011 (UTC)

Rosamond, Barbie and Cosmic River, 'cuz they're nice :) JustLittleOlMe Lil   Jay JLOM   Mrs. Gideon  23:20, October 4, 2011 (UTC)

SG, Barbie, and Rosamond -- If your undies are tight, <font color="#D2691E">it's uncomfortable.   If you're a boy and your bra is tight, I'm uncomfortable  23:25, October 12, 2011 (UTC)

Chapter Four chat
Rhonda, I don't know if you have last names for your characters, but I think Noforthwal (pronounced "No Fourth Wall") would be good for Julie. She seems to be your go-to character for Fourth Wall jokes, which may be why she's emerging as one of my favorites. (It might become tiresome in another story, but it works well in yours.) My other emerging favorite among the newbies is probably Jovi. I can see her getting into a friendly (or, at times, possibly not so friendly) rivalry with Courtney, because they're both alpha girls and the fact that they now seem to get along well needn't stop them jockeying for position. She didn't do well in the Jeopardy challenge, but maybe it just didn't play to her strengths. As for the vets, I had to chuckle at the way Lindsay got a critical question right because of something printed on her nail polish bottle. My own competition story will also plainly establish that Lindsay, for all her limited intellect on other matters, is something of an idiot savant when it comes to matters of beauty.

I noted with amusement the story's reference (via Julie, of course) to its own Talk page. I noticed that you copied part of one of my earlier comments verbatim. I'll suggest a revision, though, for the Legacy reference. The way you currently have it ensures that the reference won't escape anyone who's read Legacy, but you might consider making it a little more concise, which would also make it more cryptic and give it a little more of an in-joke quality (since you're probably going to list all the references in the Trivia section, anyway). For example, when Heather says she wouldn't mind if Gwen was dead, Julie could say something like, "Yeah, right. If she was dead, you'd probably name your baby after her." Heather would then think, even more than she did in the current version, that Julie's response was something from out of the blue.

As for the story itself, my only complaint about Chapter 4 was that the play-by-play of the wheel challenge was very repetitive. You should find a way to mix up the description a little.

And, finally, a tech tip: I don't think you use enough commas. Granted, most people don't use as many commas as they once did; but still, it's not a minor point, because there are situations where having a comma or not can change the sentence's meaning. An easy way to check comma use is to read the sentence either aloud or with "mental speech". If the line has any point where you naturally pause for a moment, consider putting a comma there. Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I-- 23:59, July 29, 2011 (UTC)

Thanks Gideon. I felt Julie was very funny in this chapter. And I love your idea for her last name. It actually helps for a joke I wanted to make in the next chapter. And I'm glad you like Jovi too. I agree Courtney and Jovi should continue having a rivalry. I'll work on it for the next chapter. And I'm glad you liked Julie said what you said from the talk page. I was afraid it would offend you. I don't know why I did but I don't want you or anyone upset by what I put. I'll edit the Legacy comment. I admit I could have wrote it better. And the wheel challenge defiantly wasn't interesting. I think it might be because of the lack of dialogue. I'll see if I can squeeze another joke in there. And I'll also check for commas. Sadly grammar is not my strength. That is one thing I have to go over. Thanks again Gideon I love reading your reviews! Be prepared for the murkiest scam! Meticulous planning, Tenacity spanning, Decades of denial, Is simply why I'll, Be queen undisputed! Respected, saluted, And seen for the wonder I am! 00:25, July 30, 2011 (UTC)

The first part of the challenge reads much better now. Julie's antics break up the repetitiveness, and your revisions of the play-by-play also helped in that regard. By the by, I took the liberty of going in and cleaning up a bit of obsolete formatting code that was left over after you edited the Legacy reference. I figured you wouldn't mind, and it was easier to do it myself than to tell you where to find it. Also, in your last comment (and somewhere in the story, too, if memory serves) you said "defiantly" when you meant "definitely". (Both real words, but unrelated meanings.) As for my reviews, I strive to give substantive feedback, because that's how a young writer improves. Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I-- 04:01, July 30, 2011 (UTC)

Thanks Gideon. I'm glad it is better. And thanks for cleaning that up. Also I'll fix that defiantly problem. And you definitely give substantive feedback :D Be prepared for the murkiest scam! Meticulous planning, Tenacity spanning, Decades of denial, Is simply why I'll, Be queen undisputed! Respected, saluted, And seen for the wonder I am!  05:33, July 30, 2011 (UTC)

Gideon I can't remember where I used defiantly but when I used find (which is something that finds words when you type it in) I couldn't find it. Hello, hello! It's me Picasso! I will spray my words of love. With your name on every wall. &lt;3 05:25, July 31, 2011 (UTC)

I couldn't find it, either, so I must have seen it somewhere else. And I'm very familiar with the browser's Find function, since that's how I expect readers to navigate TDI-G&amp;S. Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I-- 17:32, July 31, 2011 (UTC)

Chapter Five/Six chat
Awwww. Julie. DDD: She was totally my favorite, and now I'm out of the winner guessing contest. I hope she returns like Izzy, although there are so many characters that I doubt it. But anyways, Dora was hilarious and I loved the references to TDR in Rhonda's dream. <font color="DarkMagenta">It's fun to spray yourself with mace, it's fun to squeeze your mother's face, it's fun to mow your daddy's grass, it's fun to break things made of glass!  13:52, August 6, 2011 (UTC)

I'm glad you miss Julie Toad. Julie elimination was super unfortunate and I know a few people don't like her leaving. But maybe she will come back but probably not :P Im glad you like Dora. She'll be soon again sometime. And I was hoping you would like the TDR references. It was based on my favorite chapter of TDR and was probably the best part of the whole dream and probably the chapter. Thanks for commenting. Hello, hello! It's me Picasso! I will spray my words of love. With your name on every wall. &lt;3  18:45, August 6, 2011 (UTC)

So far, that's my favorite TDR chap too! I started planning it before TDTJ started. :B <font color="DarkMagenta">It's fun to spray yourself with mace, it's fun to squeeze your mother's face, it's fun to mow your daddy's grass, it's fun to break things made of glass!  18:49, August 6, 2011 (UTC)

XD It's just so funny. My second might be the TV-athon but I'm not sure. Hello, hello! It's me Picasso! I will spray my words of love. With your name on every wall. &lt;3 18:53, August 6, 2011 (UTC)

I couldn't help noticing that Rhonda gets punched a lot in her dream. Do I detect a bit of a persecution complex, perchance? On the other hand, dream sequences have never been required to, you know, actually make sense.

As for Julie, "I have the power to break the fourth wall" indeed. (In superhero terms, I guess that would make her a reality warper.) I was surprised to see her go this early, but she went out in a blaze of something resembling glory. Chapter 5 was a real Julie showcase. (And I liked the way you worked in the Ruddigore verse.) Something tells me that we haven't seen the last of her, so I'll stick with my original Final Three guess for now. In the meantime, it looks like Nellie will be your new standard bearer for offbeat humor. Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I-- 04:39, August 10, 2011 (UTC)

I'm glad you liked the dream. That was my favorite scene. Julie's elimination is the saddest I may ever to write :( But you are right. She went out in a blaze of something resembling glory. Chapter 5 was meant to show Julie love. Julie was gonna have her own theme song in here but I felt she had done enough singing. And I'm glad you liked the Ruddigore verse. It was fun to put in. And who knows? Julie could come back so sticking with your Final Three guess is a good idea ;) Nellie will definitely be more offbeat but I hope more characters will get spotlight as well. Oh, come on. I bought KFC. It pretends to be southern, you pretend to be southern. Don't go there!  04:56, August 10, 2011 (UTC)

On the other hand, it could be argued that Julie did have a theme song of sorts. It worked for Izzy, and it works for Julie. In any case, if Julie returns, maybe we'll see your Julie theme song then, or maybe she'll sing it in the Aftermath. Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I--  05:15, August 10, 2011 (UTC)

I don't think Julie will have a theme song. It was going to be just a mash up of other songs but more Julie like. I did that and it was funny. And she might sing more song parodys. But I don't think it will be a theme song. Oh, come on. I bought KFC. It pretends to be southern, you pretend to be southern. Don't go there!  05:18, August 10, 2011 (UTC)

Some of the "it's/its" changes you just made were right the first time. "Its" is a possessive, so you would use it when you're talking about something (either an item or an abstract quality) belonging to something that you happen to be referring to as "it". If you're contracting "it is", which is what you're doing in the vast majority of cases, then you want "it's". Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I--  02:09, August 17, 2011 (UTC)

Thanks Gideon. I'm going to fix that right now. Oh, come on. I bought KFC. It pretends to be southern, you pretend to be southern. Don't go there!  02:11, August 17, 2011 (UTC)

JULIE!!! I love your story and can't wait for next chapter. :D --<font color="#00008B">HINT:A AWESOME USER, <font color="#D2691E">that loves Chatango and Chatting but wonders, <font color="#00FFFF">what's with Cyan? 02:17, August 17, 2011 (UTC)

Aw thanks :D I really appericate the comment. And I miss Julie to! XD The new chapter should be up soon. Oh, come on. I bought KFC. It pretends to be southern, you pretend to be southern. Don't go there!  02:22, August 17, 2011 (UTC)

IM SUPER EXCITED!!! I CANT WAIT TO READ! GOING TO READ RIGHT NOW! ITS GOING TO TAKE AN HOUR! --<font color="#00008B">HINT:A AWESOME USER, <font color="#D2691E">that loves Chatango and Chatting but wonders, <font color="#00FFFF">what's with Cyan? 01:02, September 26, 2011 (UTC)

I'm so glad your excited Webly! :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD! It is long. Maybe my longest so far. But I hope you enjoy it! Oh, come on. I bought KFC. It pretends to be southern, you pretend to be southern. Don't go there!  01:09, September 26, 2011 (UTC)

It was a great chapter and I have so many things to say. I THINK BRIDGETTE GOT THREE LINES! XD, shocker. I was kind of surprised Taylor went. I thought it would of been one of the characters without much development like Bridgette. Cosmic River's past was mind boggling and I really liked it. Rosamond is epic in the chapter and Gwen and Duncan breaking up wasn't expected. I honestly didn't think it was really in Courtney's character to be so supportive but hey, it's not my story. Characters that you need to work on from this point are Chef, Bridgette, and Geoff (who I don't really care for). Really great chapter but too long. Try to make it a little shorter in the future. --<font color="#00008B">HINT:A AWESOME USER, <font color="#D2691E">that loves Chatango and Chatting but wonders, <font color="#00FFFF">what's with Cyan? 19:10, September 26, 2011 (UTC)

XD I'm glad you like that Bridgette got a little more screen time. I wanted to give her more but I wasn't sure how. Bridgette will get more screen time, it just hasn't gotten to there yet. I will wrok hard to expanding upon her for you Webly :3 Taylor was suprising but it was for the plot (sorta) and I wanted to use Jovi to show how tough being a leader can be like in this situation. I'm proud of how Jovi did. Taylor was originally going to be third and I couldn't find a good place for her to go either. Cosmic River's past was one of my favorite parts about this chapter and I really like writing for him now and have some new ideas for him. I also feel like Rosamond was very big in this chapter and I loved that. Gwen and Duncan was to seem unexpected and I felt it as needed. Chef does need some work but I have trouble writing for him because I'm not good with his speech. I will work on Bridgette and will try with Geoff. Sorry it was so long but a lot of plot had to be done but the challenge was in five parts and there might be a little too much comic relief. Thanks so much for the reply Webly :DDDDD! Oh, come on. I bought KFC. It pretends to be southern, you pretend to be southern. Don't go there!  20:42, September 26, 2011 (UTC)

Where's Chapter 6 chat? xD So let's start: I really liked the chapter. It was pretty good. I loved the sheep makeover. And the Kangaroos. :3 Well, I didn't liked Taylor that much, she was kinda annoying, and she screwed up in the challenge. I would vote for her, instead of Trent. Julie's segment is AWESOME. I loved it (well, it was Julie, and is written by Rhonda, it's obviously hilarious). Saint Pepper is epic. I'm so happy that Julie liked my gifts. :D This Rebecca Black doll is freaking annoying, but not as much as the real one. IWantMySG15 is so dead. xD I loved her segment. Bruno!  Talk!   Editcount!  00:15, September 29, 2011 (UTC)

XD Thanks for commenting Bruno :DDDD! And thanks for entering the WGC (Sorry CR and Julie are taken. Are they my fav OCs? :P). That is a good question so I changed it to five/six. I'm super glad you liked the chapter. The sheep makeovers and kangaroos probably were the best parts because they were a little less anti climatic and much funnier. I'm glad you won't miss Taylor. She was annoying and she did screw up again though she wasn't the only one who didn't win their part of the challenge (though she gave no effort). And I'm so glad you loved Julie's segment :DDD! I feel so flattered by your comment on being written by Rhonda. Saint Pepper was so much fun. He and Mr.Coconut will appear again. And I loved your gift ideas. XD What you said about Rebecca Black is funny and true. And yes IWantMySG15 is so dead. I think her segment stole the whole episode. I might do another segment with Julie. Thanks for commenting Bruno and I'm so glad you enjoyed the chapter :D! Oh, come on. I bought KFC. It pretends to be southern, you pretend to be southern. Don't go there!  03:07, September 29, 2011 (UTC) XD Thanks for commenting. I'm glad you still like Chef. And I'm glad you don't miss any of the eliminated contestants (you don't miss Julie though? :O). I'm glad you love all the humor and hope you'll like what you read in the future! Oh, come on. I bought KFC. It pretends to be southern, you pretend to be southern. Don't go there!  19:41, October 2, 2011 (UTC)
 * has been inactive for like a month lol* I have still been reading this, and I'm finally commenting! :D I'm glad Chef is still in. As for the eliminated contestants so far...I don't miss any of them too much. I'm so excited for more! :D :P I love the comedy and allusions in this storeh :3 <font color="Orange">Got it memorized? <font color="Green">Got what memorized?  <font color="Orange">I have no idea.  23:29, October 1, 2011 (UTC)

First of all, Julie is incredible. You know that, I'm sure. She's actually a lot deeper than Izzy, and funnier! Julie is completely awesome, and deserves her popularity! And yay for that random, out-of-nowhere Julie segment in the latest chapter!

I like a lot of the other original characters, too. I don't really dislike any... well, Collin was sorta' annoying, and I feel bad that I often forget Mikey's there. For some reason, he doesn't stand out the same. Probably doesn't help that he hangs with such hyperactive people already as it is =P

If I counted correctly, Bridgette has had nineteen lines in the story so far. That's actually more than I was expecting XD It's not like I'm any good at balancing everyone, and my favorite author isn't that good at it either, so it's all good, but just sorta' fun to notice. I keep forgetting she's there until she talks ;)

It wasn't just Bridgette, but a few characters feel just sorta' there. Which is something I have a tendency to do too, so I don't want it to sound like I'm insulting you, but it's pretty obvious which characters you enjoy writing for more than others. Heh... to some extent, it almost feels like Courtney and Sierra are the only two canon characters in the story ;)

Courtney's incredible here, and it feels like you get her! So nice when so many people despise the poor girl. *sniff* It's so nice reading a non-evil Courtney, but a nice girl who's got a few issues.

Gwen... I'm kind of surprised, but I wound up feeling a bit bad for her. Even as unbearing and cruel as she was earlier in the story, I felt bad for her in the latest chapter. I guess it helps that Gwen's realized that she's got faults, too. It's too bad she just missed out on coming clean before everyone else found out, though.

It was sad, what happened between Taylor and Trent. All just a huge mess of miscommunication between them. And now Taylor's gone. *sniff* Poor Taylor. And poor Trent too, really. You make me like Trent more than I'd ever liked him on the show =D

I'm betting Barbie reminds Heather of herself.

Ooh, ooh! Are we ever going to get to see what Jenny and Toby look like? They seem important enough to see! Unless the vulture killed them. Then maybe I don't want to see their gory remains o_O

Anyway, awesome story! You know that, though =D Frank15 05:44, October 4, 2011 (UTC)

Rhonda, I love how you make so much fun of yourself! I'm superglad that Julie showed up again, and such strange things she gets from her fans! :O Also, I felt a bond with Lindsay's Rose and Rosamond's Matilda. Kudos and thanks! I liked Taylor, but she was forever crying, and I hope Trent gets a girlfriend. I laughed and laughed and laughed through all of chapter 6! Are Jenny and Toby based on someone here or someone you know? Or none of the above? Thank you for a FANtastic chapter!!! Ooooh, and I LOVED that crazy singing doll that Julie couldn't kill. Hmmm...I wonder what movie that reminds me of? *evil maniacal laughter!* XD JustLittleOlMe Lil   Jay JLOM   Mrs. Gideon  23:33, October 4, 2011 (UTC)

@Frank Thanks for commenting :D! I'm so glad you love Julie! :DDDD Julie has to be everyone's favorite. I'm glad you didn't like Collin (I hate him D:<) and I know Mikey can be forgetful. I hope to make him more memorable as the show continues but who knows. Bridgette is really forgettable but that will change. I agree that Courtney and Sierra fell like the only canon characters. I love writing a nice Courtney I doubt that will change. And I'm glad you choose her for WGC. Gwen has gone through a lot for only 6 chapters XD and will go through more. I'm glad you like Trent :D! I feel he hasn't been given much justice. Yes Barbie does remind Heather of herself and we'll see that later through the story. I'm glad you like Jenny and Toby. I'll see if I can get Reddy to draw a picture.

@ JLOM Thanks for commenting Ms. Gideon :D! XD I do make fun of myself a lot. I know one part in the story (I think chapter 4) everyone just randomly insults me and think Julie says something about generic insult about Rhonda or something. I know that was a bit of a spoof on how the hosts (and often the writers as hosts) are portrayed as really dumb, creepy and weird. Of course I am all those things :P. I think I'm only there to create comic relief. I loved Julie's segment. XD The fans gave some crazy things but I think that is perfect for Julie ;D I think most of those things will appear in the story again. I'm gad you felt a bond (Rosamond's kangaroo is Bruce but I honestly got confused on those as well). I'm not sure what the Kudos is for but your welcome :D! Sorry Taylor had to go but she did and Trent might get a girlfriend but I won't tell. I was glad you laughed so much (I try). Jenny and Toby came from a script I wrote after finishing a project in science in school last year. I don't know how I came up with them but I loved them and thought they would be funny as new aftermath hosts. XD I loved your pun. XD And that crazy singing doll was awesome but I don't know what movie your talking about (*shifts eyes back and forth) :P. XD I like you picked Barbie. Oh, come on. I bought KFC. It pretends to be southern, you pretend to be southern. Don't go there!  02:52, October 5, 2011 (UTC)

I love your spoof on hosts. I'm glad Jule and her craziness will reappear. Rose, Bruce and Matilda are sweet animals, and the kudos were for giving all the animals a nice big part in that chapter. (Reminds me of someone else writing about animals, but I can't remember who;) I like Jenny and Toby (and the vulture. :) Julie could name her revolting doll Upchuck, since she hates - *singer's name here* - so much. :) Yay Barbie! :D

Gideon told me this was a long chapter. After I read it he told me how long - 20,000 words!! :o I was wondering why it took me helf the day to read! It was completely worth my time, though, and I am truly grateful for all of this! :D JustLittleOlMe Lil   Jay JLOM   Mrs. Gideon  19:37, October 5, 2011 (UTC)

"So yeah, your face is pretty soft!!!" I love that so much, from marshmallow people right??? I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it. 23:03, October 6, 2011 (UTC)

I enjoyed chapter 6, but from a technical standpoint it's not your best work. You seem to be backsliding with mechanical problems such as multiple speakers in a paragraph and (more seriously) using the wrong homophone or near-homophone. The latter was common enough in chapter 6 to become distracting in places. A notable example was your reference to a kangaroo's "poach". That's a real word, but it's the wrong part of speech (a verb) and a different meaning. (Several meanings, actually, ranging from crime to cooking.) I'll grant the possibility that these problems only seemed more common because the chapter was so long that there would naturally be more incidents, but the point remains. We've discussed this before, and you've admitted that it's a problem for you, but you really need to be a little more skeptical with the spell check.

As for the chapter's plot and incidents, well done on the whole. My only complaint, and it's a fairly minor one, is that some of Nellie's gloom seemed a little forced. Most notably, her saying that the heat of the Outback is not as bad as flames sounds more like an optimistic "things could be worse" attitude than Nellie's "if things can get worse, they will" mindset. I think it would have been more in keeping with Nellie's outlook to follow up her complaint about the heat with a monologue on how people get lost in the desert and die of heat stroke and dehydration, complete with a graphic description of the symptoms.

As you know, Jovi is one of my favorites in this story, and I thought you did a good job with her "lonely at the top" segment. Just one thing, though: saying that she had to do what the team wanted is the mark of a weaker leader than you generally depict Jovi as being. Instead of saying "its my job to do what the team wants", it would have been better to say, "it's my job to do what's best for the team". Although both phrasings emphasize Jovi's internal conflict, the latter does so without making her look weak in the process. Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I--  22:33, October 8, 2011 (UTC)

@ JLOM: Thanks Jay. I try to be funny and make a lot of spoofs. Julie will make another appearance one way or another ;) I loved all the animals and I think I know what story your talking about ;) Jenny, Toby and the vulture were pretty good this chapter :D The vulture was suppose to die but I didn't make that clear enough so I think it will live. XD She would call the doll Upchuck if there is any left of it. I didn't think the chapter would be that long :O. Thanks Ms. Gideon. i'm grateful for you (And everyone else) who reads.

@ Omg.cha.cha: Yup from marshmallow people :P. I glad you loved it. I'm so glad to hear from you! I thought you left the wiki. I'm glad you haven't and you like the story :D!

@ Gideon: Thanks for commenting Gideon. By my best chapter I meant it based on the humor along with the plot and length. But the grammar is horrible. I'm not sure what you mean about the speakers in the multiple paragraphs. I try to change paragraph whenever a speaker speaks. Is that not how it is suppose to be? But my homophones are probably what is the worst thing with the story. I didn't even realize I had messed up pouch and poach. I don't do much of a grammar check because I wanna post the chapter soon especially this one because I was so proud of it and it has been forever since I put up another chapter. But I do need to pay more attention.

I'm glad you liked the plot. I think there might have been more plot (maybe just with Cosmic River) and I think it was great. But your right about Nellie. I hadn't even realized that. And it is a huge problem! Nellie can't be optimistic. I'm going to change that tonight. I think she might have done that more than once. I'm absolutely going to change that.

I'm glad you liked Jovi. I was trying to show that being a leader isn't easy and that they're good things and bad things about a leader. I didn't consider Jovi's statement to show her being weaker but it does make sense. Technically she has to do what the team wants or they could vote her out. But your right. I'll change that.

Thanks for commenting Gideon :D. This feedback has really helped me (but what feedback of yours hasn't?). I also hope you'll enjoy the aftermath. Julie will be singing a certain song and wearing an interesting outfit, both which you might like ;). Again thank you, you've helped me realize some mistakes and now thanks to you I can fix them and (hopefully) not make them again. Oh, come on. I bought KFC. It pretends to be southern, you pretend to be southern.  Don't go there!  23:05, October 8, 2011 (UTC)

To clarify, there were several places where you had two speakers in the same paragraph. I seem to recall that most of these were cases where the second speaker's reply line is very short. Here's one example I found:


 * "Why don't you go take a shower in the room with all the showers that has never been mentioned till now." Bradley says. "Whatever," Heather replies walking away.

Heather's reply should be a new paragraph, but you probably missed it because it's so short. (Also, Bradley's dialogue should end with a comma, not a period, because the sentence continues after the quote is closed, and you should have a comma after "replies", because it's a natural pause point.)

Another thing you have to watch is word order, because a misordered phrase can change the meaning. For example, the line


 * Meanwhile a girl watching the show named Matilda calls her lawyers to sue the show

makes it sound like Matilda is the name of the show, when it's supposed to be the name of the girl. (You should also have a comma after "meanwhile", because that's a natural pause point.)

On an unrelated note, I think we can now say that TDWTH is officially a story with no fourth wall. After the elimination of your designated fourth wall breaker, chapter 6 had a veritable wrecking crew pulverizing whatever might have remained of that battered barrier. Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I--  23:50, October 8, 2011 (UTC)

I just finished reading what you have up so far, and I love it so much!!! I have to say, that the way you have developed Jovi is outstanding. I created her thinking she would end up being somewhat of another Courtney, but the way you have given her depth is beyond me! She was meant to be a charicature of me when I first came up with her, and as it turns out, you write "me" better than I write myself! So what is your biggest dream???... For the TARDIS to land at Hogwarts! *ChaCha* 23:03, October 12, 2011 (UTC)

@ Gideon I think those are caused because I have to separate the lines in source mode. I had them separated but they were joined in source mode. I also didn't realize my order was so off. Were working on grammar in school but I'm still bad at. Maybe I'll learn something to help me. And I guess the reason the fourth wall was destroyed is because Julie left such a huge hole that people tried to use the hole but ended up breaking it. Does that make sense? I'm going to keep it so that Julie is really the only one making the fourth wall jokes. She does it best and I think that the barrier does need to exist so that Julie's fourth wall jokes make sense. Jenny, Toby and Rhonda may make fourth wall jokes but I think Jenny and Toby need to so they can ask Julie fourth wall related aftermath questions and I just feel like Rhonda does because she is Jenny and Toby's friend. I will have it made so that only those four are really aware of the fourth wall (unless plot says so otherwise).

@ ChaCha I'm glad you caught up and so glad you love it! :D I'm glad you like Jovi's development! She is a really great character and I think she is very popular with the fans (she is number two, and was almost number one, on Frank's Character rankings) and I'm honored that you think I wrote you better yourself!  Your heart, your heart abandoned. Your wrong now bear the shame. Like dead trees in cold December nothing but ashes remain. Oh Ember, so warm and tender, you will remember my name!  01:53, October 30, 2011 (UTC)

Okay, that's it. I'm finally gonna do it. I'm going to read this story. (Puts on Anti-Bad Grammar armor) If I don't come back out alive... (grabs anti-bad grammar sword) Tell my family I love them. (Runs into the realms of TDWTH?) (Don't take this seriously for the record Rhonda, I really am gonna read this, but your grammar's not nearly as bad as this makes it out to be. xD) Mrdaimion:   like you,   only better.  23:06, November 30, 2011 (UTC)

XD Thanks Mr.D. And if you don't know, Jay has actually been fixing over some of my grammar and has done a few chapters so it will not be as bad as you think it.  Your heart, your heart abandoned. Your wrong now bear the shame. Like dead trees in cold December nothing but ashes remain. Oh Ember, so warm and tender, you will remember my name!  23:15, November 30, 2011 (UTC)

Godspeed, MrD in your battle against the Rouge Angles Of Satin! I think you'll find the reward worth the risk. Wifey has gotten partway through Chapter 3 with her cleanup. Gideoncrawle I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I--  02:17, December 1, 2011 (UTC)

Chapter 7/8 Chat
Good lord, that sucked! XDDD, just kidding. It was hilarious! I loved Jenny, "YOUR MOM!" whenever she was super mad at Toby. My parents questioned why I was laughing at the internet during my reading. I loved the advertising for TDIdiots and the random mention of my name in a paragraph. I just loved everything. I honestly have no idea who's going to go next I just wish Julie would return. -- If your undies are tight, <font color="#D2691E">it's uncomfortable.   If you're a boy and your bra is tight, I'm uncomfortable  19:27, January 22, 2012 (UTC)

XDDDDDDDDD I'm so glad you liked it! I was so worried this chapter was going to fail. Jenny and Toby are too much fun to write for and I love whenever she says "YOUR MOM!" XD I found it so funny your parents questioned that. I can just see it. I'm glad you liked the advertising, I felt it was a good idea since the aftermath did do a whole lot of advertising, plus I want more people to read IDIdiots :P The random mention of your name just came to me and had a B sound to it so I thought, "What The Heck?" (Get It :P). I'm so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so,...SO glad you enjoyed it! I think what's you start reading the next chapter it will become clear who leaves. And who knows, Julie might return ;P <font color="33FF33">Now you’ve got one hand. Look around, floating town. <font color="6600CC">Tell a baby to talk to the hand!  21:18, January 22, 2012 (UTC)

I'm not done with the chapter, but I have to say one thing. I actually know a girl named Taylor Taylor. Not even kidding. XDDD Arrivederci, I'mma leave   before this battle begins.   ...  21:57, January 22, 2012 (UTC)

XD I know :P You told me that on Taylor's page and it gave me the idea for a video guest :P Though I accidentally called you Webly when I said that on Taylor's page. I'm not sure why I did, but I'll fix it. XDDD Thanks for giving me the idea of Taylor Taylor and I hope you enjoy it! <font color="33FF33">Now you’ve got one hand. Look around, floating town. <font color="6600CC">Tell a baby to talk to the hand!  22:17, January 22, 2012 (UTC)

That was a lot of fun! I really loved Rhonda and Julie's interviews, and I enjoyed reading that hippo interview, too! xD Jenny and Toby were great hosts, and I'm looking forward to future interviews. :) JustLittleOlMe Lil   Jay JLOM   Lady Gideon  01:00, January 25, 2012 (UTC)

Thank you Jay! I'm extra glad people liked it! Julie's interview was my favorite and I think it did add a layer of depth to her (or at least some depth). Rhonda's was funny too. And the hippo was awesome! Thank you for suggesting it! I'm glad you liked the two as hosts, I found the two too much fun to write for! I can't wait to do another aftermath. <font color="33FF33">Now you’ve got one hand. Look around, floating town. <font color="6600CC">Tell a baby to talk to the hand!  02:51, January 27, 2012 (UTC)

{C}{C}Nice chapter. I kind of shocked about Duncan's elimination, expecting Heather to go home. Can't wait for chappy 9. :D Because you deserve it. 10:35, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

Oh, now I see why you needed Nate's pic! XD drop a description on my talk and you'll get him ASAP. :3 -- Laura Is  Evil  13:14, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

Thanks Flame :D I kinda wanted Heather to go just because she was so cocky at her elimination but plot triumphs want. I can't wait to post Chapter 9! <font color="33FF33">Now you’ve got one hand. Look around, floating town. <font color="6600CC">Tell a baby to talk to the hand!  17:38, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

XD Yup that's why Reddy :P Thanks for understanding Reddy :) I'll post it right now. <font color="33FF33">Now you’ve got one hand. Look around, floating town. <font color="6600CC">Tell a baby to talk to the hand!  17:38, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

Yeah three cheers for Jovi. I freaking love this story. I could use a few friends... or friends period. *ChaCha* 21:07, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

XD Hip Hip Hooray! Hip Hip Hooray! Hip Hip Hooray! Hip Hip Hooray! XD I threw a fourth in there because I love Jovi! :P I'm glad you love the story ChaCha and glad to hear from you :) I hope to give Jovi an extended role next episode as she tackles leading in a stressful (and apocalyptic) situation and expand on her and Rosamond's friendship with the introduction of Nate! I'm so glad to you like it! <font color="33FF33">Now you’ve got one hand. Look around, floating town. <font color="6600CC">Tell a baby to talk to the hand!  21:23, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

Oh I can't wait! I love how Jovi loves cats and what not. She is a future crazy cat lady. XD I could use a few friends... or friends period. *ChaCha*  22:27, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

Finally read the first part. I loved it. That is a hilarious chapter. Jenny and Toby are epic. "YOUR MOM!". xD I'm glad to see Rhonda. She's awesome, and Amanda (her #1 Fan) is hilarious. She's so crazy. Loved Jenny's Annoying Orange reference. "Hey Hey Rhonda." xD I loved the references to others stories. TylerXMaya FTW. xD I love TylerXLindsay, though. And YAY, you used my question for Collin. xD I liked Leshawna's guest, also. I'm glad she regrets what she did. She's awesome. :D I loved the Talking Obese Animal segment. The Ballerina Hippo is awesome. xD When Arthur arrived, I expected that he would be Dolph, but didn't expected that he really was Amanda. And Yay for free-advertsiment for "The Adventures of Cobra Man". xD I'll read the rest later, and leave the comment. :D Anne Maria:  "Brick may not be attractive in any way, but he is still a person." 17:03, February 11, 2012 (UTC)

Oh, and I'll read Chapter 8 also. I didn't knew it was already posted. xD Anne Maria:  "Brick may not be attractive in any way, but he is still a person." 17:05, February 11, 2012 (UTC)

So, Whitney Houston is in this chapter. That's pretty much what I have to say about her. She was a great singer, anyway. It could be a tribute for her, but you wrote this chapter before her death. Justin was boring, but it was funny his segment. xD Taylor's life have been pretty sad. She was boring, but the thing with her boyfriend was sad. Julie's entrance equally to awesome. :D The Sprink's characters scene was LOL. Creigh and Sky Lynn would be a awesome couple. So, i just loved Julie's segment. I like that she's still has feelings for SG. And yeah, I'm not surprised she didn't answered the questions about her background life. xD It's Julie. I liked her song also. I loved the ending with the cupcakes. It reminded me of Oprah, giving prizes to everybody. :P Loved the Aftermath. Now I'll read chapter 8. Anne Maria: "Brick may not be attractive in any way, but he is still a person." 16:56, February 16, 2012 (UTC)


 * I'm glad you liked it! :D I'm glad you like Jenny and Toby too! And that you think Rhonda's awesome and you like Amanda as I want her to make more appearances. XD I'm glad you liked Jenny's Annoying Orange reference (I didn't realize it was from The Annoying Orange, I must have subconsciously copied it). And I'm really glad you liked the references to other stories and you like Tyler x Maya. I felt like I needed to explain why Lindsay didn't like Tyler and felt that was a better way than just making Lindsay forget.


 * Thanks for asking your question to Collin, I was happy to use it! LeShawna's ending was to give her some closure and because she is awesome! I'm glad you like The Talking Obese Animal segment and Arthur showed up because you suggested him, which thank you for doing :D XD Yeah the free advertisement was funny, but I thought it would be funny to do a movie trailer for Cobra Man, especially with the other super hero trailers that have come out.


 * Yeah, this was before Whitney Houston's death, and I fell bad for it. I'm going to try to do that funeral for her based on LTDI. I'm glad you thought Justin was funny. There just wasn't much to say about him. Taylor is kinda boring but she has had a sad life. I'm glad you loved Julie's entrance as I really liked it too. XD Creigh and Sky Lynn should be a couple! We should make a club! I'm really glad you liked Julie's segment. Julie does still have feelings for SG, but she's trying to act like she doesn't. And I don't blame her the way thinks played out.


 * I'm glad you not surprised as I know people wanted answers but I just don't think we'll get answers. I'm glad you loved the song. Gideon suggested it to me and it was too good not to do! I'm glad you loved the ending, and the cupcakes do remind me of Oprah too! I can't wait to see your thoughts on chapter 8! Thanks for commenting Bruno, I really appreciate it :D Rhonda is the meanest, vilest, ugliest, stankiest, crankiest, won’t even say high to your momma, cheapest, creepiest, arrogant sea witch in all the seas! And I’m not very fond of her either.  03:07, March 22, 2012 (UTC)

I've been needing to comment here. I hadn't commented on Chapter 7 or 8, and so I've been needing to do that, really. This story is too awesome to leave un-commentd on!

Toby really is so cruel to poor, innocent Jenny. Having to put up with someone like him. Someone whose feet smell like monkeys, melted butter, and PEE.

Yay for Amanda Show references! I remember that show =D And Whitney Houston... feels so eerie, remembering that you wrote that before she died.

Sprinklemist is so cruel, killing Julie's husband and children. I thought he was nicer than that. *sniffle*

I must say that you got me with the cupcake thing. At first, it just felt like a silly commercial that maybe Julie made, obsessing over purple cupcakes. Then it felt stranger when the cupcakes were handed out, and we got a long scene detailing exactly which colored cupcakes everyone took. I just thought it was meant to be a silly and kinda' out-there scene, describing in such loving detail what cupcakes everyone took. I'm ashamed of myself for not realizing just how important that scene was! Heck, Cody practically mentioned how important it was by stating how not important it was! It did seem like Jenny would have prefered Sadie eat the purple cupcake instead of Julie, for some odd reason. No idea why she would've prefered that, though.

Cosmic River, tomato worms are one of many insects that destroy crops. They're the kind of bug that we want to destroy, so Heather kinda' had the right idea, wanting to stomp on it =P

That was really random, for Julie to remind everyone she knows Spanish out of nowhere. Guess she really doesn't want another "everyone's ignoring me" type incident =P

"Actually one team got two new people." And people think Lindsay's stupid! But yay, Julie's back! I'm not too surprised she's returned, but I did think we'd have to wait longer for her to come back. Now she can get revenge on Gwen, mwa ha ha ha!

And whoa, Bridgette was more than just background decoration! She actually had an important role in the chapter! I love Bridgette, so I'm happy to see her getting to do stuff, like realize "hey, I haven't done anything so far! I need to break up with Geoff and develop my character here!" Go Bridgette!

And poor Barbie. She's so used to being treated so poorly. And it seems like it's still hurting her, even though she's trying not to let it hurt her. Poor girl needs a hug. Frank15 12:30, March 6, 2012 (UTC)


 * Glad you commented Frank! XD I'm glad you think it's awesome enough to comment on! XD Toby isn't the nicest to Jenny but Jenny isn't the nicest person either. They suit each for that. I loved the Amanda Show as a kid :D I hate they cancelled it. I don't blame you for finding it eerie about Whitney Houston. I feel really bad about it, but I wrote it before than so it wasn't intentional and I just have to remember that.


 * XD Sprink is suspicious >:P JK, XD I think that was a very funny scene (even though kids, though technically watermelons and a fake husband died) and was a bit of a homage to Sprink's stuff, in a way. I'm glad I got you with the cupcakes! XD I liked the way you summed it up. I thought it would be a bit odd but I thought it would be something that people wouldn't really pay attention. XD Cody's line was a give way that it was more important. And Jenny would have prefered Sadie because Jenny and Julie got in a fight. They did that because Jenny kinda sees Julie as a threat to her popularity.


 * Well tomato worms help with pollination so they're not that bad. Bugs are like that, they can do good things and they can do bad things. XD It was random of Julie to say she speaks Spanish. I just felt like it should be mentioned again, since abilities and things like that are forgotten in the canon. And your probably right about the incident, XD I didn't think of that but it makes sense.


 * And I love giving Lindsay lines where she seems smart! I figured you guys would know she was coming back. But it is early :P And she might get her revenge >:D I was really glad Bridgette got more lines too! I saw Bridgette and Geoff were at everybody's least favorite so I decided to give them more spotlight. I really enjoyed Bridgette and am really ready to give her some more spotlight.


 * I'm glad you sympathize with Barbie since she kinda deserves it. I really like how you described Barbie's hurt. XD You describe Barbie's character than I can in words sometimes Frank. I don't know if Barbie is the kind who likes a hug but I'm sure it would be better than the way she's been treated. Thanks so much for commenting Frank, I really love your feedback =D Rhonda is the meanest, vilest, ugliest, stankiest, crankiest, won’t even say high to your momma, cheapest, creepiest, arrogant sea witch in all the seas! And I’m not very fond of her either.  03:07, March 22, 2012 (UTC)

Like Frank, I've fallen behind in my commenting. Although my comments this time may seem mostly negative, don't take that the wrong way--I did enjoy the last two chapters, just like those that came before.

Chapter 8 seemed to be one of those episodes that are all about character development, with the challenge itself being almost an afterthought. I must point out, though, that Clinton, Palin and the Obamas really don't belong in a history-based challenge, although they would have been good choices for a challenge based on current events. From a mechanics standpoint, you said "recuse" several times when you clearly meant "rescue". ("Recuse" is a real word, but an unrelated concept that is mainly of interest to lawyers.) In the graffiti scene (the gist of which was presumably that Gwen is, ahem, free with her favors) you said "crave" several times when you clearly meant "carve". Finally, Jovi said "Curtain two" when you clearly meant "curtain three"--she and Rosamund had just beeen talking about #3, and Sierra had already picked #2.

Although I'm glad to see Julie back in action, and my decision to stick to my Final 3 guess after her elimination is now vindicated, you do need to take care that this story doesn't turn into "The Julie Noforthwal Show" (although that might be a viable spinoff concept). You have other interesting characters, you know, both original and otherwise. Most notably, I think the Aftermath neither needed nor benefitted from having three Julie clips at the beginning, when the other interviewees each had only one. Julie had plenty of screen time when she finally appeared in the flesh, so the multiple opening clips struck me as piling on.

On the brighter side, it was good to see Julie get some added depth, since she's such an important character to the story. It's also good to see some of the neglected vets doing more. Bridgette and Geoff were among those who had spent most of the story in the background. And Nellie answered my question well enough, the short version being that she does indeed endure because she thinks the alternative is even worse.

One last thing: you seemed to have just a little too much fun writing the scene where the hippo thrashes Rhonda to within an inch of her life. If this story wasn't so unabashedly cartoonish, I'd be a little worried about you... Gideoncrawle  I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I--  05:09, March 20, 2012 (UTC)


 * I'm glad you enjoyed the chapters Gideon and it's ok that your comments seem negative, I know it's constructive criticism and it helps make my writing better. I agree with you on Chapter 8, I was trying more to develop characters and get plot in motion that doing an adventure, which most around the world challenges are meant to be, which probably explains why all the pre challenge stuff takes so long. Yes, Clinton, Palin and The Obamas aren't really history (except maybe Obama being the first African American president). I'm not really sure why, but I had the thought of Chef dressed as Hilary Clinton and Nellie as Sarah Palin and just decided to work it in a challenge. However I think the history thing can be justified in that Chris doesn't really care about American History (shown when he talked to Jovi and Rosamond) so the challenge isn't very true to history or cares about American culture (like with the cherry trees).


 * Thanking you for telling me about the word problems. I really appreciate it and will fix after I get this comment up. When I read these mistakes I kind just have to ask myself, "Really Rhonda?" It's kinda laughable in a way. And yes, the carvings did say some suggestive things about being free with her favors. I didn't say what it exactly said since, it is a kid's shows kinda, and tried to have the camera never show the table top.


 * I completely agree with you on Julie getting too much focus. I'm trying hard too not give Julie too much focus. Sadly, she does get a bit of focus and plays a role in the next two-three chapters (the two parter may become one episode based on changes so it could be two to three) but I'm really trying to get more characters focused on. I really need to use the original cast more and I'm trying to do that, like with Bridgette and Geoff, so hopefully that will show. I'm glad you think that though and it isn't my imagination. I really want to make sure the character doesn't become too featured that people call her a Mary Sue, since people really hate those.


 * The Aftermath was very Julie focused, although a possible reason for that I guess could be Jenny and Toby's excitement of seeing her or marketing by the network. I just thought if that now so it wasn't intentional.


 * I am glad you liked the development, as that was my favorite part of The Aftermath, and I really appreciate the song you suggested (which helped with development ideas for Julie). I think everyone is glad that Bridgette and Geoff got spotlight, and I'm really glad everyone likes that. I really appreciate your question to Nellie and thought it was a good one. I really love Nellie and glad you like her too and helping me give her some spotlight.


 * And yeah, Rhonda gets beat up and put down alot. I would so you don't have to be worried but...I know that there are more beatings in the future. Thank you so much for commenting Gideon, I really appreciate it and glad you could get to reply :) Rhonda is the meanest, vilest, ugliest, stankiest, crankiest, won’t even say high to your momma, cheapest, creepiest, arrogant sea witch in all the seas! And I’m not very fond of her either.  03:07, March 22, 2012 (UTC)


 * Worry not, I doubt that anyone will ever consider Julie a Mary Sue based on what she's done to this point. She really doesn't have any of the common MS traits except for unusual hair color and the ability to sing well. No, the danger in overusing an off-the-wall character like Julie is the possibility of fatigue/overload reactions from the readers, and Julie is definitely the sort who can push everyone else to the margins if you let her. Gideoncrawle  I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I--  02:50, March 23, 2012 (UTC)


 * I'm glad to hear you say that :D And I do understand what you're saying about Julie and am going to try to be more careful with her and am trying to give more characters screen time. I think the new chapter did use her a little less. But I am glad you don't think she is a Mary Sue. Rhonda is the meanest, vilest, ugliest, stankiest, crankiest, won’t even say high to your momma, cheapest, creepiest, arrogant sea witch in all the seas! And I’m not very fond of her either.  01:31, April 23, 2012 (UTC)

Yays Cosmic River is still in it! I'm really sorry, Rhonda, for not being able to read this story in awhile. I have missed soo much from my hitaus. I think this story was on it's fourth chapter when I last read it. XP Anyways, I'll catch up soon  Freedom's just another word for nothin' left to lose  R.I.P Janis  02:31, April 19, 2012 (UTC)
 * I'm glad to see you comment Lindsay :D I understand why you haven't been able to and it's ok. XD The story hasn't gotten to far from where you left off, only five chapters (though they are long). XD on April 24th, it will be the day I made this page. I'm glad you plan on catching up and I will tell you that I hope you like the development that Cosmic River gets. Rhonda is the meanest, vilest, ugliest, stankiest, crankiest, won’t even say high to your momma, cheapest, creepiest, arrogant sea witch in all the seas! And I’m not very fond of her either.  01:31, April 23, 2012 (UTC)

Chapter 9-11 Chat
Barbie stole the episode. That was probably unavoidable, but yeah, she stole the episode.

Anyway, I'll get to that later. First (second technically, I suppose), wow... can't believe Chris felt it was worth mentioning the tomato worm scene in the recap!

Julie, you know Nellie has to remind us that she's the depressed one. I mean, what if someone skipped the first eight chapters? Then they might not know! Think about it.

'''Sandwiches and crackers! Sandwiches and crackers! Sandwiches and crackers!''' OK, I'm bad at being Julie-ish. Just sounds like a random song she'd have sung.

Four teens and a doberman... wonder if they're competing against the Mystery Machine gang, or if Scooby died and the gang just replaced him with a doberman ;)

That's right, Rosamond. You should make sure Nate shuns Gwen! Help SG out by vilifying Gwen XD

Of course they're going to Jersey Shore. Though I suppose Cody hasn't been around Julie for long, so it sorta' kinda' excuses his hubris.

Did Rhonda make the sandwiches to order, or what? How did Sierra know which sandwich Rhonda was making would go to Gwen? I mean, I know Julie had weird plot convenience powers like that, but Sierra?

I love Nellie's confessional. It's rather insightful for her. She really is worried about hurting Sierra and Julie, even though she tries to not care and just feel everything is already horrible. It's... oddly positive for Nellie. I mean, it's still full of her signature negativity, but it's got an underlying feeling of optimism to it, wanting forgiveness and rainbows and bunnies for all!

'Sides, what's the worst Julie can do, anyway? Throw Nellie in a sack? She does that even when she likes you =P

I feel so bad for Barbie. She's just been treated so cruelly left and right, and it's obviously getting too her. It's a shame she wasn't able to enjoy the chocolate-covered cherry.

Cosmic River, it was an evil caterpillar Heather almost stepped on! Evil!

It's actually pretty expected that Barbie didn't have a look of smug satisfaction or glee after chewing Heather out. She probably knows that isn't going to make her happy. It's just something she needs to do, because she just realizes she shouldn't let Heather abuse her like she has been. I actually feel kind of bad for Heather, but I felt bad for her before this chapter, anyway. Still, it's nice that, even if Barbie knows the crap Heather's been through, that she still thinks of her as a monster. And there's really no reason Barbie shouldn't think that: what Heather went through when she was younger is a pitiful excuse for putting Barbie through the torment she's been put through. So even if I feel kinda' bad for Heather, Barbie does not owe her any sympathy.

Still, even if Barbie was able to finally bite back, it's hard not to feel bad for her, still. Just because she's no longer taking her torment lying down doesn't mean the torment has stopped. She could really use a hug if she would want a hug, anyway.

I rather enjoyed all the pointless exposition about how repeating the Jersey Shore information would just be pointless exposition that we already knew. It was funny XD

Of course Nate would be the only one to notice Jenny and Toby missing... wait...

Noooo! Jenny! Poor, poor Jenny. She was too good for this earth. Too good for this earth! To be so tragically possibly dead in New Jersey. She will be remembered as a hero.

Oh yeah, and that other guy who was always so mean to poor Jenny... Coby, I think? Guess he's a goner too.

And Chris, shame on you! Jenny has an official name! That puts her above nameless intern status, so you can't just kill her off! And I guess Toby has a name too, and Jenny isn't the same without Toby, so I guess you kinda' need to save him too. It's a package deal with those two. It'd be like Lavern & Shirley if Shirley left the show.

...wait. You mean that actually happened?! NOOOOO!!!

Rosamond inner monologuing to herself :D It's almost a shame that Rosamond's big scene was largely overshadowed by Barbie, because this was great for her, and something she really benefited from. It was great to see Rosamond in action, and seeing her handle her predicament, and getting to know her better. She needed the development, and I'm glad she got some here. And I hope when she finds the girl that she's still a normal girl, happy to get her dolly back.

I know, Julie. Everyone just complains too much. Who does Cody think he is, Nellie? Just chill.

"MORE WORDS IN CAPS AND BOLD!"

I'm not sure if Jovi's little speech was done this way on purpose, but I like how it was done, anyway, the speech about saving Rosamond, and a person only getting to live once, and stuff. Mostly, her logic doesn't seem particularly sound, but she's probably got a good reason for not using pure logic in this case. I mean, sure, saving Rosamond's life is more important than fame on a mediocre reality TV show... except the decision isn't quite that simple when you realize that it's really a choice between saving Rosamond's life versus saving Jenny and Toby's life. I mean, even if you don't count Toby's life, there's still poor, innocent Jenny's life. On the other hand, Jovi's certainly closer to Rosamond than she is to either Jenny or Tobi, but it's not really the clear-cut black-and-white morality decision that Jovi's making it sound like. But then again, Rosamond could be dead for all Jovi knows, so she's got a pretty good excuse for not acting like a completely logical-but-unfeeling machine at the moment.

And I probably pick on Toby too much. It's just too easy, though.

Courtney... this is new for Courtney. She usually gets really angry and bossy when she feels paranoid over losing control, but like she said, it's gotten a lot more real. It's like she knows she's not just being paranoid, and she's in a different state of mind for it. Not her usual angry and bossy "losing control" self, but a much more scared one. Poor Courtney.

I'm guessing Bradley's still insulting Barbie to prove he's in control, to show Barbie she has no power over him. And really, Bradley does seem pretty unfazed by her, whereas Heather is clearly losing her sanity. And Cosmic River... has become an instrument in Barbie's development! On one hand, it's too bad Cosmic River's still not much of a character of his own, but on the other hand, I don't care all that much, really. Barbie's what's important here. Frank15 09:15, April 22, 2012 (UTC)


 * EEEE! :DDDDD Your comment makes me all happy! :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD XD


 * I'm very glad Barbie was well received. I was worried that she wouldn't be liked because she talked or that her dialogue wouldn't seem clever (kind of like Noah's dialogue is bad). But knowing that she stole the episode, know that is just awesome! XD It probably was unavoidable, but it wasn't bad and it was really good for her.


 * XD Chris mentioned the tomato worm because it was important. It was the "straw that broke the camel's back" to finally have Cosmic River vote for Heather, which caused Heather to blame Barbie, which was "the straw that broke the camel's back" to have been enough for Barbie to fight back. So it was important in a way. My recaps tend to be pretty bad though :P


 * And I just want to say, that I guess Cosmic River was looking at the good of the creature isn't of the bad. And that Heather almost squashing it made Cosmic River want to vote for Heather because she was so angry and ignorant to nature or others, which she showed by ignoring him. XD I'm sorry I'm making a big explanation of it, and I'll try to have Cosmic River more likable.


 * XD You're right, someone might do that. And that is a song that Julie might sing. And I thought Scooby-Doo was a doberman, XD I'll have to change it (I now know it's a great dane).


 * And I didn't think of Rosamond telling that to Nate as being taken like that :P And yeah Cody is excused this time but might not be next time. And Rhonda was in on Sierra and Nellie's plan, since both knew each other. She let them tamper with the sandwich and then delivered it to Gwen. I thing although do a bonus segment thing on the page called "Total Drama What The Heck? Extras", like the bonus videos they did for TDWT, and I'll have that in a scene.


 * I'm glad you liked Nellie's confessional. I really did too and think you described it perfectly (although the rainbow and bunnies are questionable :P)


 * XD You make a good point about the sack. I think she is more worried about hurting her friends than she is what they will do to her.


 * And yeah, Barbie's life sucks D: And I don't think you would have enjoyed the cherries if she ate them, being too sad.


 * I think you explain Barbie better than I do! XD You just gave me inspiration for a new scene in a future chapter. I think you're just spot on about her. I'm glad you understand that why her face wouldn't show that and why Barbie doesn't feel bad. And yeah, she's still getting tormenting, and she probably needs a hug.


 * XD I'm glad you liked, it was actually inspired by something Gideon says which Reddy parodied first (give credit where credit is do :P).


 * XD It made sense for Nate being the detective. Being a detective he has to notice these things. XD And yes Jenny and Toby maybe possibly dead. Jenny was too good. And yeah, "Coby" is ok but he is not Jenny :P And shame on Chris indeed. Jenny isn't an intern, she's on the page. And Jenny and Toby do need each other, or at least for their comedy duo to work. XD And Shirley did leave :O What The Heck? (no pun intended).


 * And I'm so glad you liked Rosamond's inner monologue! I really think Rosamond needed it because she was starting to feel like "Jovi's best friend/sidekick." I dislike that it may/was overshadowed by Barbie (though Julie didn't steal the spotlight so that is a plus). I really liked it and was going to add more but I decided to leave it as a cliffhanger :P I'm glad she benefitted from it.


 * I think the girl will be happy when Rosamond returns her doll...and other things (Totally not foreshadowing :P).


 * XD Yeah, everyone complains except poor Julie. And Cody did feel like Nellie. And I really enjoyed that scene with the Fun Bunch.


 * I'm glad you like Jovi's speech. With Jovi, I try to show how leading and be a leader is. Jovi probably isn't making the most sound decision because she has to make the decision as the leader and has to do it in a very difficult situation with not much time to think. I guess Jovi didn't consider Jenny and Toby's lives, but I guess she was thinking "the other teams are looking and they'll probably find them if we don't". So it was more about winning than saving lives though you are right, she did make it out in black and white morality when it wasn't. And her friendship with Rosamond did influence her decision.


 * Jovi also had trouble whether to believe in her friend (who said before she fell out to do the challenge and she would be fine) or doing what she thought was right.


 * XD And it's ok you pick on Toby, I love your extreme Jenny love.


 * And you are spot on with Courtney to! Be spot on again and you win a free sandwich :P She was in a different state of mind and very paranoid. Poor Courtney indeed.


 * You're right Bradley is still insulting Barbie to prove he is in control. But Bradley is a bit worried though... >:P


 * And Heather is clearing losing her sanity. And it can only go downhill... And yeah Cosmic River did get a bigger part in Barbie's development. The two will have a bigger role together. XD Yeah it doesn't help him as a character but it could in the future.


 * Thanks for the comment Frank :D I would have replied sooner but you gave me some ideas (some not even for this story) so I had to write them down. Thanks so much Frank :D Rhonda is the meanest, vilest, ugliest, stankiest, crankiest, won’t even say high to your momma, cheapest, creepiest, arrogant sea witch in all the seas! And I’m not very fond of her either.  01:31, April 23, 2012 (UTC)


 * Cosmic River's OK. I don't hate him... I'm mostly indifferent to him, which I guess isn't all that great.


 * Heh. Rhonda's so mature, working with Sierra and Nellie to get revenge on Gwen =P


 * Yay for giving you inspiration on what to do with Barbie in the future!


 * Yeah, Shirley wasn't in most of the last season of Laverne & Shirley. It was as disappointing as it sounds.


 * The scene with the Fun Bunch was a good break from all the serious, dramatic stuff going on. It was nice to have a lighthearted scene with gangsters threatening to kill girl scouts... actually, how the heck did that become the challenge's lighthearted scene!


 * That logic makes sense: the other teams are likely looking for Jenny and Toby instead of Rosamond, so I can get that. Good point.


 * What can I say? Jenny's fun! She acts like she's more mature and grown up than everyone else, especially Toby, when she's possibly the least mature one there!


 * Anyway, you're welcome, and yay for giving you ideas =D Frank15


 * XD It's ok that Cosmic River isn't you're favorite. I'm just glad you commented :D And you're entitled to your own opinion.


 * Rhonda takes after me :P And thank you for the great ideas! I'll tell you what they are, if I ever get that far. XD And It sounds like the last season was pretty bad. Wasn't the last episode all about a character that wasn't Laverne? Like they were getting their own spin off?


 * And I like the way you described how The Fun Bunch played a role in the story. It was one of my favorite parts, both in The Fun Bunch's actions and I liked the gangsters conversations. XDD And you bring up a good point, that really isn't funny when you think about it. But The Fun Bunch make it fun :P


 * XD I'm glad that actually made sense about Jovi (I explain really badly). And you make a great point about Jenny which I never thought of, and explains why I like writing for her. Rhonda is the meanest, vilest, ugliest, stankiest, crankiest, won’t even say high to your momma, cheapest, creepiest, arrogant sea witch in all the seas! And I’m not very fond of her either.  01:46, April 25, 2012 (UTC)


 * Heh. You're absolutely correct about the Laverne and Shirley finale. Shirley wasn't in it at all, and even Laverne was barely in it! What The Heck kind of a way is that to end the show?! I actually enjoyed the show a lot when I was younger and always on in syndication, but ehh... an unworthy way to end the show. Frank15 04:03, April 25, 2012 (UTC)

I was scrolling through this story today and realized how behind I was in this story. Last time I read this awesome story was waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back in September of 2011. After that, I just got so busy with school and friends and stuff like that. I'll try to keep ahead of this story, considering how epic it is :D I am  Jo , be very afraid!  01:25, April 28, 2012 (UTC)
 * XD It's ok Jo. I understand getting busy, plus my story doesn't have a great update schedule that is as current. I'm glad to hear from you and hear you're going to try to keep ahead of it :D Rhonda is the meanest, vilest, ugliest, stankiest, crankiest, won’t even say high to your momma, cheapest, creepiest, arrogant sea witch in all the seas! And I’m not very fond of her either.  01:30, April 28, 2012 (UTC)

I finally got around to read chapter one, and I loved it. xD Julie is definately in my top five. ~ <span style="color:purple; text-shadow: 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0, 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0, 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0, 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0">M <span style="color:grey; text-shadow: 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0, 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0, 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0, 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0">T<span style="color:blue; text-shadow: 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0, 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0, 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0, 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0">D<span style="color:#6E6EF7; text-shadow: 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0, 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0, 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0, 0 0 0.2em #B8BEE0">M  <span style="color:black; text-shadow: 0 0 0.2em #C285E0, 0 0 0.2em #C285E0, 0 0 0.2em #C285E0, 0 0 0.2em #C285E0">03:23, May 6, 2012 (UTC)

'''ANOTHER EXCESSIVELY LONG COMMENTARY FOLLOWS. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED'''

Well, this episode certainly took a hard dramatic turn, didn’t it? Especially with Rosamond facing an uncertain fate.

The recap note that “Bradley seduced Lindsay” might be a bit racier than you intended, given that the most common meaning of “seduce” is “convince someone to have sex with you”. I suppose Bradley could conceivably have done that, but such things are presumably beyond the scope of this story. The thought also occurs that, since Chris was the one who mentioned it, he might have deliberately chosen his words that way in an attempt to goose the show’s ratings.

As for the Scooby Doo reference, the Doberman could have indicated a knockoff mystery-solving gang, but you’ve generally been using real names. On the other hand, maybe Scooby did die of old age, as Frank suggested. Bigger animals are usually longer-lived than smaller species; but among dogs, it’s the giant breeds that have the shortest lifespans, averaging only 8-10 years.

The evolving cats bit wasn’t perchance a Red Dwarf reference, was it? That would certainly fit this story’s pattern of including as many allusions as you can pack in.

And then there’s Barbie. When people are subjected to constant bullying, sometimes they break, but sometimes they snap. In the latter case, things can get messy. Heather should be thankful (although we know perfectly well that she won’t be) that Barbie’s outburst was as restrained as it was. Revealing what she knows now makes (or should make) Barbie a huge target—if anyone takes her claims seriously. If they don’t, it’s their funeral, so to speak. Despite her threat against Heather, though, I’m guessing that Barbie still wants out. That would be a logical reason for her to tip her hand the way she did, in which case she might be better at manipulation than she thinks.

Speaking of Barbie’s inside knowledge, it was a nice bit of irony that the Lindsay, the turnip-brained crown princess of Bimbonia, was one of the few who were “intelligent enough to pick up on another fact”, i.e. the increase in the grand prize, from Barbie’s passing mention. Has our favorite airhead been holding out on us? If so, then Bradley had better watch his back, because the newly assertive Barbie may be the least of his problems.

Naturally, I caught the LTDI reference. (It was kind of hard to miss.) I can’t imagine why I’m not surprised that you took my simple narrative flourish for skipping over repetitive content, and turned it into a Fourth Wall joke. Speaking of LTDI, Barbie’s mention of the interns’ drowning their sorrows has given me an idea for my own story. I’ll be sure to credit you if I do use it.

Regarding the challenge portion of the chapter, two hours seems like a wholly inadequate time, unless someone gets lucky (as Team Rocket appears to have done). Traveling on foot, it’s conceivable that a team could head for the outskirts the moment they landed, and still miss the deadline. It might take Rosamond two hours just to get out of the hotel “carcass”.

Regarding Jovi’s seeming lack of concern for Jenny and Toby, several possibilities suggest themselves. One is the “band of brothers” mindset. Rosamond is both a teammate and a friend, whereas Jenny and Toby are (as far as the contestants are concerned) basically furniture, not unlike the interns. Under the stress of the moment, Jovi could perhaps be forgiven for not thinking of Jenny and Toby as “real” people. She might also think that Jenny and Toby can take care of themselves, even without the distinct possibility that Chris might know their whereabouts and condition; whereas Rosamond, being alone, is much more likely to be in serious trouble.

As for Jenny and Toby, one team being told that they’re at the medical center and another team thinking they see Toby suggests the possibility that there might be decoys running around. (That reminds me of a line from the movie, Spaceballs: “Idiots! You’ve captured their stunt doubles!”) Gideoncrawle  I have a song to sing, O!  Sing me your song, O!  A wandering minstrel, I--  06:04, May 7, 2012 (UTC)