Total Drama Woods

Total Drama Woods is a fan fiction where Chris McLean invites 20 all new campers to Camp Wawanakwa to compete for 1 million dollars.

Killer Sharks

 * 7-Up
 * Adam
 * Bianca
 * Carol
 * Eric
 * Irene
 * Jamie
 * Michael
 * Oscar
 * Vivian

Screaming Beavers

 * Brandon
 * Derek
 * Ernest
 * Faith
 * Harpo
 * Kyle
 * Oprah
 * Rena
 * Simon
 * Tanya

Episodes

 * 1) Here and Now? - Part 1
 * 2) Here and Now? - Part 2
 * 3) Fame is the Name of the Game
 * 4) Canoewrecked
 * 5) The Gold Meddle
 * 6) Cirque de Stupide
 * 7) Jeopardy!
 * 8) The Lakeside Story
 * 9) Brick by Brick
 * 10) Across the Facts
 * 11) Sweet Baby Jamie
 * 12) An Olympic Quintathalon
 * 13) The Empty Bathroom Stall
 * 14) Afraid to Merge...NOT!
 * 15) Here Comes the Ton
 * 16) A Night in Paris
 * 17) The Michael of the Labyrinth
 * 18) Total Drama Kart
 * 19) The Devil is Bianca
 * 20) Home Is Where The Dart Is
 * 21) Bear Prudence
 * 22) Destination Playa des Losers
 * 23) The Ugly Truth
 * 24) A Race Through the Ages
 * 25) Steal or No Steal

Chapter 1 - Here and Now? - Part 1
Chris walked up to the camera and started to say "Hello viewers, I'm Chris McLean, and I'm back at Camp Wawanakwa. Now here's the deal. I'm calling 20 all new campers to endure what the original 22 campers had to do here. They'll all be competing for the same prize, one million dollars! Now get ready for Total Drama Woods!"

(Theme song)

Chris walked onto the Dock of Shame as a boat arrived and said "Here's our first contestant, Carol!"

Carol ran off the boat and jumped onto Chris. "No way! I'm actually here! Where's the party?"

Chris replied confused "Um...there is no party."

Carol sadly said "But we need to celebrate."

"It's a reality show, not Christmas," Chris replied. "And on that note, here comes Jamie"

Jamie walked up to Chris and said "Hey Chris, how's it going?"

Chris replied "Hey Jamie, what's up?"

"The sky, duh!" Jamie said. Chris rolled his eyes and announced the next contestant arriving. "Here comes Derek"

Derek walked off the boat. "Here Chris, I baked you some cookies shaped like your face" he said handing Chris the cookies.

Chris took the cookies and said "You're my favorite so far" as he ate the cookie. "Here comes Rena."

The boat drove up and Rena jumped off. She walked up to the other contestants. "Hello, it's nice to meet you all"

Jamie ran up to Rena and said "Hello. My name is Jamie."

"Hi, Jamie. By the way, my doctor told me to tell someone my blood type." Rena said.

Jamie replied "Isn't it red?" Rena stared at her puzzled.

Chris cut in saying "Here comes the next camper, Oscar!"

Oscar did a kickflip off the boat on his skateboard and landed next to Chris. "What's up Chris?"

"Why does everyone ask that?" Jamie said.

"And here comes S'ven" Chris said.

S'ven jumps off the boat. "Actually my stage name is 7-Up."

Chris said "Whatever. No one has ever heard of you anyway. Hey, Vivian's boat should be arriving."

Vivian magically appeared right in front of Chris. Chris looked surprised. "Here you are. This is Vivian, the magician."

"Hey everybody. Want to see a magic trick?" Vivian said.

"Sorry, not now. Here comes Michael." Chris said.

Michael jumped off the boat. "Hey ladies, what's up?"

Michael spotted Rena and walked over to her. "I'd like to be on a team with her."

Rena replied "Get lost."

"Whatever. There are a lot of other girls here." Michael said.

"Here comes Irene" Chris said.

Irene walked off the boat and said "Ye doggy, this is a nice vacationing spot."

"This isn't a vacation, hillbilly." Michael said. "This is a reality show."

"Okay, here comes Brandon." Chris said.

Brandon hopped off the boat and played a chord on his guitar. "Hey Chris."

Brandon walked next to Rena and smiled at her and she smiled back.

"Okay moving on." Chris said. "Here's Adam."

Adam ran off the boat and shook Chris's hand. "I'm so psyched to be here. I love camping."

"Does anyone besides me realize that this isn't actually camp?" Michael said. "It's a competition."

"Hey, look. It's Eric." Chris said.

Eric walked off the boat. "I'm here. Just finishing something on the boat."

The boat exploded behind Eric. "Nice job dork" Michael said.

"You're the one with the glasses." Eric said.

Michael ran up and threw Eric off the dock.

Another boat came up. "Here's Faith."

Faith bounded off the boat. "You might as well leave now cuz I'm gonna win."

Chris said "Let's pick this up. Here comes Simon."

Simon ran off the boat. "Hey guys. I'm the captain of my high school varsity football, basketball, soccer, and baseball team."

"Here's Kyle." Chris said.

All the girls gasped in shock as Kyle stepped on the dock. "He's gorgeous!" Jamie said.

"Poser" mumbled Michael.

"Here comes Tanya" Chris said.

Tanya stomps off the boat. "I can't believe I signed up for this."

"What are you wearing?" Rena said. "You should dress more like...like..."

Bianca stepped off the boat and glares at everyone.

"...like that" Rena finished.

"This is Bianca, she's a supermodel." Chris said.

"Hot" Michael said.

"And now here's Ernest" Chris said.

Ernest jumped off the boat and bumped into Faith. Faith punched him and knocked him down. "Watch where you are going" she said.

"Last, but not least, Harpo and Oprah" Chris said.

"I can't believe you signed me up for this" Oprah said while getting off.

"Come on, it will be...wow!" Harpo paused, staring at Kyle.

"Seriously" Michael said.

"Now that everyone is here, let's name the teams. If I say your name, line up here." Chris said. "Oscar, Carol, Vivian, Michael, Jamie, Bianca, Irene, 7-Up, Adam, and Eric. You are officially the Killer Sharks!"

Chris handed Jamie the flag. "Sharks are scary."

"Waah...waah..." Michael immitated jokingly.

"Now" Chris said. "If I call you, go over there. Kyle, Harpo, Oprah, Brandon, Rena, Faith, Ernest, Simon, Derek, and Tanya. You guys are the Screaming Beavers."

Chris handed Rena the flag.

"Go put your stuff in your cabins and meet me in the mess hall in 10" Chris said.

Trivia

 * Here is the order of the campers that arrived on the island:
 * 1) Carol
 * 2) Jamie
 * 3) Derek
 * 4) Rena
 * 5) Oscar
 * 6) 7-Up
 * 7) Vivian
 * 8) Michael
 * 9) Irene
 * 10) Brandon
 * 11) Adam
 * 12) Eric
 * 13) Faith
 * 14) Simon
 * 15) Kyle
 * 16) Tanya
 * 17) Bianca
 * 18) Ernest
 * 19) Harpo and Oprah
 * No one uses the confessional in this episode.

Chapter 2 - Here and Now? - Part 2
"Last time on Total Drama Woods," Chris said. "All the campers arrived on the island. Some smart, some...not so much. Conflicts started to form at the scene, and so did a few relationships. Now that the teams are formed, they will face their first challenge this time on Total...Drama...Woods!"

(Theme song)

The campers all sat in the mess hall with their teams while they ate. The Screaming Beavers talked about strategy. "We need the advantage or we are all going home." Faith said.

"We should get someone from the other team to sabotage their team so we never lose." Rena said.

"How about Adam? He seems nice." Tanya said. "And he's the strongest guy." she quickly added.

"Okay, why don't you go talk to him?" Rena said. She quietly giggled after.

Tanya walked over to the Killer Sharks's table and grabbed Adam. "Hey Adam."

"Oh, hi. You're Tanya, right?" Adam said. "I wish I was on your team. All of my teammates are idiots."

"Glad to here you say that." Tanya said. "My team was talking about you sabotaging your team until the teams merge, and we'll make sure you aren't eliminated."

"I don't know." Adam replied unsure. "I guess I could try."

Chris walked in the room. "Hello campers, it is time for the challenge, but first I'd like to tell you a few things. That bathroom stall outside is a confessional. You can share any confessionals there."

"I'm so glad Harpo signed me up for this thing." Oprah said in a confessional. "There are so many hot guys!"

"It's awesome that Tanya...and the Screaming Beavers accepted me onto their team." Adam said in a confessional. "I'm just worried about the Killer Sharks will think if they find out."

"Follow me to your first challenge." Chris said and walked outside. The campers followed him to see an airplane. They all piled onto the airplane and it took off.

"Your first challenge is to jump out of the plane and land in Camp Wawanakwa." Chris said as he opened the door.

"What?!" Adam said.

"I said..." Chris started to say, but was interrupted as the campers shouted "WE HEARD YOU!"

"There are 4 rings, the middle one is worth 50 points, the one outside is 20, outside of that is 10, and the most outer ring is 5 points. If you don't land in a ring or refuse to jump, you get no points." Chris said.

"Hey, where's Vivian?" Michael asked.

"There she is" Eric said, pointing out the door. "She teleported into the middle ring."

"That's 50 points for the Killer Sharks." Chris said.

"You're next, science nerd." Michael said to Eric as he pushed him out the door.

"Here we go!" Michael said as he jumped out the door.

"The Killer Sharks are on a roll with 150 points." Chris said. "Adam?"

"Um...Chris...I am acrophobia." Adam replied.

"There are no arches." Jamie said. "You just need to jump."

"Well then" Chris said. "How about you Bianca?"

"Pass." Bianca said. "I can't get my hair messed up."

"Anyone?" Chris asked.

"I'll go!" Carol said. "I've always wanted to jump out of a plane." Carol leaped out of the plane.



"Oh...only 5 points" Chris said. "Who's next for the Killer Sharks?"

"I'm up dudes!" Oscar shouted as he jumped out.

"That's 20!" Chris said. "Irene, let's go!"

"Gosh, that's awfully high!" Irene said. "I'll stay up here, if it's okay with everyone else."

"Okay fine, 7-Up?" Chris replied.

"Here we go!" 7-Up said as he ran off.

"Missed the rings" Chris said. "That's a big fat zero! Last for the Killer Sharks is Jamie!"

Jamie replied "It's way too scary! I'm staying!"

"Okay. Time for the Screaming Beavers. Who's up?" Chris said. All of the Screaming Beavers backed away from the door.

"Come on. Someone has to jump! The Killer Sharks only have 175 points!" Chris said.

"Chris is right!" Rena said. She started to run and jumped off.

"50 points!" Chris said.

"Come on, nerd boy!" Faith said while she picked up Ernest. "You're coming too." Ernest screamed as Faith jumped out of the plane.

"20 points for both!" Chris said. "Who's up?"

"Here I go!" Simon said. He jumped off the plane.

"Another 50 points" Chris said.

"Rock on!" Brandon said as he jumped off.

"He missed them!" Chris said.

"I'm not going!" Harpo said.

"Me neither." Oprah said.

"Well, I guess I'm up!" Kyle said and he jumped off.

"I changed my mind." Harpo and Oprah said at the same time and they jumped off.

"Kyle got a 20 and the Hopra sisters both missed." Chris said.

Derek said "I'm not going. It's way too high."

"Well Tanya" Chris said. "It's all up to you. It's 175-160. Will you jump?"

Chris noticed that Tanya was gone. "Where's Tanya?"

"Out the door" Jamie said.

Chris looked out the door and said "20 points! The Screaming Beavers win! Now let's land this airplane at Camp Wawanakwa."

The airplane landed to meet all the contestants who jumped.

Chris walked off the the airplane with the contestants who didn't jump. "Killer Sharks, you lost, so vote off your favorite loser and meet me at the campfire." he said.

Michael grabbed Jamie on her shoulder. "Hey Jamie, how would you like to go to the final two with me?" he said.

"The final two." Jamie squealed. "With you?" She fainted.

"Are you okay?" Michael asked. Jamie got up and assured him that she was okay.

"All you have to do is help me through the challenges and vote off who I tell you too." Michael said.

"Jamie is so stupid." Michael said in a confessional. "But she'll do anything I want. Why? Because I'm hot!"

All of the Killer Sharks were sitting around a campfire. Chris walked up to the podium and said "Hello Killer Sharks. Welcome to the first campfire ceremony. If I call your name, come and get your marshmallow." As he called the camper's names they come to the podium and grab a marshmallow.

"Oscar"

"Vivian"

"7-Up"

"Bianca"

"Carol"

"Eric"

"Jamie"

"Michael"

"Irene and Adam, the last marshmallow goes to..."

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"Adam"

"What?!" Irene exclaimed. "But who would go and vote me off?"

"Maybe next time you should take the competition seriously" Michael said.

"Sorry Irene" Chris said. "You have to ride the Boat of Losers."

Irene sadly walked on the Dock of Shame.

"Who will be eliminated next? Will Jamie quit working with Michael? Will Adam's inter-team alliance continue? Find out next time on Total...Drama...Woods!"

Irene is eliminated.

Trivia

 * Oprah, Adam, and Michael use the confessional in this episode.

Chapter 3 - Fame is the Name of the Game
"Last time on Total Drama Woods," Chris said. "The new contestants faced their first challenge as they jumped out of an airplane down into the waters below. Some refused to jump, including Adam, who secured his alliance with the Screaming Beavers. The Screaming Beavers won, which forced the Killer Sharks to vote off a fellow Shark. Irene left the island due to Michael's new alliance with Jamie. Who will win this time on Total...Drama...Woods!"

(Theme song)

The boys walked out of their cabin, all tired. "Dude, why do we have to get up so early?" 7-Up complained.

"Yeah, we need our rest so my team of losers can actually win a challenge." Michael said.

"Come on guys. I get up at this time each morning to run." Simon said.

Oscar jumped out of the cabin on his skateboard and did a kickflip, but it vanished as soon as it touched the ground. "Where'd my skateboard go?" he asked.

"I...have it." Brandon said as he handed the skateboard back to Oscar.

Vivian appeared right in front of Brandon and Oscar. "Come on guys! You totally need to wake up." she said. Then she vanished.

Later, the boys walked into the mess hall to meet the girls. Chris ran into the mess hall. "Hello campers. It's time for your second challenge."

"And before noon." Michael said.

"Anyway," Chris continued. "You have to pick three people to join the talent competition. Stage auditions and have your team at the amphitheater by 6 o' clock."

Later the Killer Sharks were sitting outside the cabins holding auditions. "Eric, you're next." Michael called out.

Eric pulled out beakers and test tubes and started mixing them together.

"What are you doing?" Michael asked.

The beakers started bubbling and then exploded next.

"Next!" Michael said.

Adam walked up.

"I needed to do really well during the audition so I could sabotage the act on stage." Adam said in a confessional.

"I can make a basket with branches and twigs in less than a minute." Adam said.

"Ooooh...sewing. We're totally going to win now." Michael said.

"It's not sewing, it's weaving, but I can sew if you want me to." Adam said.

"Next." Michael yelled.

Meanwhile, the Screaming Beavers were holding auditions too.

"Harpo and Oprah, want to go next?" Rena asked.

"No." Oprah said.

"Come on Oprah. It'll be fun." Harpo said.

"Fine. Tanya, you want to go next?" Rena said.

"No way." Tanya replied. "I'm not participating."

"Simon?" Rena asked.

Simon rode in on his bike and did a wheelie, but crashed into the cabin.

Meanwhile, the Sharks were still holding auditions.

"Bianca" Michael said. "Your turn."

Lights turned on and focused on Bianca. She walked down the runway and posed.

"Bianca's in." Michael said. "How about you 7-Up?"

7-Up started beatboxing and then breakdanced at the same time.

"Awesome. He's in too!" Michael said.

Back with the Beavers, Brandon was auditioning, playing his guitar.

"It was good enough to get in." Rena said, pretending not to be interested. "Kyle, why don't you go next?"

Kyle started to bench press, having Harpo and Oprah and more on each time.

"We have nothing better." Rena said. "I guess your in."

Over the loud speaker, Chris said "Contestants, the talent show is about to start. Get your butts to the amphitheater!"

That night at the amphitheater, Chris walked up on stage. "Up first for the Killer Sharks, the magic goth, Vivian."

Chris vanished and was replaced with Vivian, blindfolded, behind a table with things to throw. The Beavers push a spinning wheel with Eric attached onto the stage.

"Why is it always me?" Eric cried. Vivian started throwing knives at Ernest. They all missed, but one disappeared right before it hit Eric. Adam quickly switched two bricks, which Vivian picked up next and threw at Ernest, hitting him on the head.

"Ooooh..." Chris said. "That's going to hurt in the morning. I give it a 5. Now for the Screaming Beavers, Kyle!"

"Of course." Michael said, rolling his eyes.

Kyle started lifting again as Harpo and Oprah added more on.

"Kinda boring, but not bad. Plus you looked good doing it. I'll give it a 9."

Bianca clutched her stomach and Michael looked at her. "Are you okay?" Michael asked.

"No, I..." Bianca said before she closed her mouth and ran into the bathroom stall, throwing up.

"I put a little something extra in Bianca's food." Adam said in a confessional.

"Those Beavers want to play hard ball." Michael said in a confessional. "Well two can play at that game."

Michael grabbed Jamie. "Jamie, I need you to do something for me."

Chris was on stage. "Okay next is..." An off-screen intern switches Chris's cards. "...Oscar"

Oscar jumped on stage on his skateboard and started doing tricks into his skateboard vanished and he fell off the stage.

"Vivian!" Michael yelled.

"I guess I forgot to take my magic charm off the skateboard." Vivian said.

"That gets a 4. Now for the Screaming Beavers, Derek!" Chris said.

Derek walked onto stage and started preparing a soup. A few minutes later, he finished.

"Let me taste!" Chris said, as Derek brought a spoonful over to him.

Chris sipped the soup and then his tongue started to burn.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what I put in there." Derek said.

Michael high-fived Jamie.

"Well that gets a 1." Chris said.

"I'm so ashamed." Derek said in a confessional. "I've never messed up a meal that simple, and if I have it is something minor, like too much salt or it needs more water."

"We'll never win now." Michael said.

"Don't worry. 7-Up can still win this." Eric said.

"Last up for the Killer Sharks, 7-Up." Chris said.

7-Up started rapping, instead of just beatboxing.

"He fixed his act." Oscar said.

"Awesome! Total 10!" Chris said.

"Ha! They need a perfect 10 to win! Try beating that!" Michael yelled.

Brandon jumped on stage and started playing his electric guitar. At the end, all the Screaming Beavers cheered.

"Another 10! Screaming Beavers win! Killer Sharks, vote off another loser.

Later at the bonfire ceremony, all of the Killer Sharks were sitting around the campfire. Chris walked up with a plate of marshmallows. "Welcome back. If I call your name, come get your marshmallow." As he called the camper's names they come to the podium and grab a marshmallow.

"Jamie"

"7-Up"

"Carol"

"Michael"

"Adam"

"Bianca"

"Eric"

"Vivian and Oscar. The final marshmallow goes to..."

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"Oscar"

"Oh well. I'm out." Vivian said as she vanished from the spot.

"See who will be eliminated next time on Total...Drama...Woods!"

Vivian is eliminated.

Trivia

 * Adam, Michael, and Derek use the confessional in this episode.

Chapter 4 - Canoewrecked
"Last time on Total Drama Woods," Chris said. "The teams competed in a talent show. The Killer Sharks chose Bianca, 7-Up, and Vivian and the Beavers chose Derek, Brandon, and Kyle. Vivian's show didn't go as planned when Adam meddled and Ernest got nailed by a brick. Bianca got a little sick and Michael had Jamie get revenge by burning my tongue. Just when the Sharks thought 7-Up saved the day, Brandon's guitar solo put the Beavers in the lead. In the end, Vivian was eliminated. Who will be eliminated now on Total...Drama...Woods!"

(Theme song)

The two teams met in the mess hall. The Screaming Beavers sat down and talked.

"I think Adam's working out really well." Rena said.

"About that," Tanya said. "I don't think we should do that anymore."

The whole team stared at her.

"Why?" Rena said.

"It's too risky," Tanya said. "Adam could get eliminated."

"Who cares?" Rena said. "As long as we keep winning challenges."

"I'm really worried about Adam." Tanya said in a confessional. "If the Sharks find out about him, I'll never forgive myself."

Chris walked in and shouted to the campers. "Hello campers!"

"Hello Chris!" Carol shouted.

"Hop on the boat and I'll explain today's challenge."

Chris led the two teams outside and onto the boat.

"Okay, you will each get into pairs of two. We will go to Boney Island. Your pair will have to find a canoe of your team's color. If you find a canoe of the other team's color, leave it alone. Your pair will ride the canoe back to Camp Wawanakwa. Whichever team gets all their members back to the island first wins. The losers, get your vote ready."

The boat landed on the shore of Boney Island and the door opened up.

"Choose your partner and go." Chris said.

Michael grabbed Eric. "Come with me, nerd!"

Rena and Tanya partnered together. 7-Up grabbed Bianca. Adam grabbed Jamie. Faith picked up Ernest. Derek and Brandon partnered with each other. Oscar and Carol partnered together.

Oprah and Harpo grabbed Kyle at the same time.

"He's mine" Oprah said. "No, he's mine!"

"Ladies." Kyle said. "Why don't you two go together and I'll go with Simon."

"Fine." They both said.

Meanwhile, Derek and Brandon were walking together.

"I just can't get over it." Derek said. "How could I have messed up that recipe?"

"Everyone messes up sometime, dude." Brandon said. "One time, I totally screwed up this solo at a band gig. The band kicked me out. So, that was just one gig."

"You're right Brandon." Derek said. "It's just one time."

"Do you think Rena likes me?" Brandon asked.

"No, duh." Derek said.

Meanwhile, Rena walked with Tanya.

"Do you think Brandon is cute?" Rena asked.

"Uh sure." Tanya responded.

"Well, what about you? Do you think Adam is cute?"

Tanya stopped. "What?"

"I know you like him, Tanya." Rena said.

"Fine." Tanya said. "I like him."

"It's fine." Rena said. "I'll personally make sure he isn't eliminated."

"Deep down inside, Rena is a good friend" Tanya said in a confessional. "even when she makes fun of my clothes."

"Hey look!" Tanya said. She pointed at a green canoe. The two picked it up and started running.

Meanwhile, Adam walked with Jamie.

"So, you and Michael seem like good friends." Adam said.

"Oh yeah." Jamie said.

"Just friends?" Adam asked.

"Yeah." Jamie said. "Well, unless you count alliance members."

"An alliance?" Adam said. "Really?"

"Jamie's so stupid" Adam said in a confessional. "She'll tell you anything."

Meanwhile, Michael and Eric were walking together.

"Hurry up, nerd." Michael said. "I'm not losing this challenge."

"Why do you have to be such a jerk?" Eric asked.

"Why do you have to be such a nerd?" Michael retorted. "It's nature!"

Michael spotted a green canoe. He walked over, picked it up, and threw it into the woods.

"Hey, that's cheating!" Eric said.

"Shut up!" Michael said.

"You know. Michael doesn't seem to respect what I devote to the team." Eric said in a confessional.

Meanwhile, Tanya and Rena run onto the beach with their canoe and see Oscar and Carol, Kyle and Simon, Oprah and Harpo, and 7-Up and Bianca leaving on their canoes.

"Come on!" Tanya said. "Get it in the water!"

Meanwhile, Brandon and Derek ran through the forest carrying a canoe. Derek tripped over a root and they both fall into the canoe, riding it down the hill. They ran over Michael and Eric and landed in the water.

"Morons!" Michael shouted.

"Get up nerd!" Michael said as he pulled on Eric's shirt. "We need to find a canoe."

Meanwhile, Adam and Jamie were running through the forest.

"So, can you do me a favor?" Adam asked.

"Like what?" Jamie asked.

"Make sure you and Michael don't vote me off." Adam said.

"Sure, but only if..." Jamie tripped over a red canoe.

"Cool. Pick it up."

Later, Adam and Jamie put the canoe in the water. Michael and Eric ran up with a canoe at the same time.

"Let's go!" Michael shouted.

Meanwhile, Faith and Ernest ran through the forest.

"Where's the canoe?" Faith shouted.

Ernest pointed into the forest. "Look!" Faith saw a green canoe in the trees.

"Looks like someone likes to cheat." Faith said.

Faith threw Ernest on top of the canoe, picked it up, and ran. They reached the beach just as Michael and Eric set into the water. Ernest jumped off and Faith threw the canoe in the water.

"Paddle!" Faith shouted.

Faith and Ernest started to catch up.

"Paddle faster, nerd!" Michael shouted.

Eric stood up and paddled faster.

"Moron, you can't stand up in a..." The canoe capsized.

"The Beavers win...again!" Chris said. "The Sharks need to vote someone off by tonight."

Later, the Killer Sharks all sat around the campfire. "As I call your name, come get a marshmallow." As he called the camper's names they come to the podium and grab a marshmallow.

"Bianca"

"Oscar"

"Carol"

"Jamie"

"7-Up"

"Adam"

"The final marshmallow goes to..."

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"Michael"

"See you later, nerd!" Michael shouted.

Eric sadly walked down the Dock of Shame.

"Will Adam destroy Michael's alliance? Will the Sharks ever win a challenge? Find out next time on Total...Drama...Woods!"

Eric is eliminated.

Trivia

 * Tanya, Adam, and Eric use the confessional in this episode.

Chapter 5 - The Gold Meddle
"Last time on Total Drama Woods. The teams traveled to Boney Island and looked for canoes. We found out Tanya actually has feelings. I know, I was shocked too. But it turns out she cares about Adam. Speaking of Adam, he manipulated Jamie into revealing Michael's alliance and was assured he wouldn't be next. After continuous torture from Michael, Eric was eliminated. Who will be next on Total...Drama...Woods!"

(Theme song)

The Killer Sharks were outside throwing a frisbee.

"Head's up!" Michael shouted as he threw it to 7-Up. 7-Up jumped up to get it, but missed it. The frisbee hit Kyle.

"Hey! Who threw that?" Kyle said.

"Oh...sorry" Michael said, obviously not caring.

"Man, back at my school, I got all the girls." Michael said in a confessional. "But here, Kyle's stealing all of my thunder."

Kyle threw the frisbee to Bianca, but Chris intercepted it.

"Campers, it's time for today's epic sports challenge!" Chris said. He threw the frisbee, but it broke a window. Everyone stared at Chris.

"Follow me." he said.

Later, Chris led the two teams to a poorly made basketball court.

"You will compete in three sport-themed challenges. You have to choose a team member and can only use one member once. Now who will you pick for a little one-on-one?" Chris said.

"Are you talking about basketball?" Michael asked. "Because this is the crappiest basketball court I've ever seen."

"Yeah" Chris said. "I just had it paved in. It's going slightly downhill and there are a few bumps, but it was a last second add-in. First one to 11 wins. Pick your player."

"Okay." Michael said. "who's good at basketball?"

"I am, dude" 7-Up said.

"Anyone else?" Michael asked. "Cool, you're up, 7-Up."

Meanwhile, the Beavers were choosing their players.

"Anyone play basketball?" Ernest asked.

"You're insulting me, Ernest." Faith said.

"Not going to argue with her." Ernest said. "I guess Faith is up."

"Okay, so our players are 7-Up and Faith. Here we go!" Chris threw the ball straight up in the air and 7-Up got it and scored.

Later, the score is 7-5, 7-Up.

"This is getting boring." Chris said. "How about we add some action?"

Chris threw paintball guns to Michael and Tanya.

"You two can be allowed to shoot the opposing team's player, if you like." Chris said.

"Sweet." Michael said.

Tanya took the gun and pointed it at 7-Up. Just as he went up to shoot the ball, a paintball hit him and he missed. Faith got the ball and ran down the court.

Later, the basketball court is colored in paint. The score is 10-10. Faith had the ball and was running down court. Michael shot her and she tripped over a bump in the court and rolled downhill. 7-Up picked up the ball and dunked it.

"7-Up wins for the Killer Sharks!" Chris shouted. "Onto the next challenge."

Chris led the two teams to an archery range. On the way, Brandon ran up to Rena.

"Hey" Brandon said. "What's up?"

"Not much" Rena replied. There was a long pause of silence.

"There's so much chemistry between them!" Michael said in a confessional. "Isn't it obvious?"

"Time for the archery challenge!" Chris shouted. "Each team choose a player to shoot a flaming arrow and knock an apple off a teammate's head."

"Who would be stupid enough to want a flaming arrow shot at their head?" Rena asked.

"That's why I will choose." Chris said. "Let's go with...Bianca for the Sharks and Derek for the Beavers!"

"Man, Chris has got to be crazy." Bianca said in a confessional.

"I think Simon should shoot the arrow." Tanya said. "Just to be safe."

"I don't know." Derek said. "Is he a good shot?"

Simon grabbed a bow and arrow. He shot an arrow and hit a bullseye. He shot another and split the arrow.

"I feel safe." Derek said.

Meanwhile, the Sharks picked their shooter.

"Who here can shoot a flaming arrow?" Michael asked.

There was a long pause of silence.

"I can" Adam said.

"You can?" Michael asked.

"Sure..." Adam said doubtfully. "Went to archery camp for 4 years."

"Is there even an archery camp?" Adam asked in a confessional.

"Okay, Adam's up." Michael said.

Later, the shooters were lined up with the teammate they'd shoot at.

"Okay" Chris said. "Let's start with the Screaming Beavers."

Simon shot the arrow. It whistled through the arrow. It hit the apple and nailed it to the confessional. The confessional set on fire.

"Is it hot in here?" Ernest said in a confessional.

"Perfect." Chris said. "Now for the Killer Sharks!"

Adam brought back the arrow in the bow and shot it. The arrow caught on Bianca's bra and ripped it off.



Bianca screamed. "I'm so sorry!" Adam said.

"I love this show!" Chris said. "Screaming Beavers win! On to the next challenge!"

Chris led the teams to the shoreline.

"Your next challenge is to swim around the island. The twist is that we had the interns fill the lake with piranhas, jellyfish, and sharks. Pick your swimmers!"

The Killer Sharks tried to choose their player.

"Who wants to be the swimmer?" Michael asked.

Carol raised her hand in the air. "OOOH...ME!!!"

"Okay, okay!" Michael said. "Carol can do it."

Meanwhile, the Beavers picked their swimmer.

"Can anyone swim well?" Rena asked.

"I can't" Harpo said. "but I look hot in a bathing suit."

"I look a lot hotter." Oprah said.

"Whatever." Rena said. "I'll do it."

Later, Carol and Rena were ready in the bikinis.

"Ready, set, go!" Chris said. The two dived into the water and started swimming. Brandon walked up to Michael.

"Doesn't Rena look awesome?" Brandon asked.

"Dude" Michael said. "If you like her, tell her already."

"I don't know." Brandon said. "She seems to think I'm a washed-up guitar player."

"Then show her your more than that." Michael asked.

Meanwhile, Carol and Rena were swimming with sharks surrounding them. Rena tried dodging the sharks. Carol saw a shark and jumped on it.

"Let's go sharky!" Carol said as she hit the shark. The shark dashed away. Rena stared in astonishment.

"That girl is insane!" Rena screamed.

Meanwhile, on the shore the contestants watched as Carol rode up on the shark.

"There's Carol!" Chris shouted. "The Killer Sharks win!"

"Yes!" Michael said. "It's about time!"

Carol hopped off the shark.

"Thanks sharky." Carol said. She reached inside her pocket, grabbed some food, and threw it to the shark.

Brandon walked up to the shore where Rena was. He stuck his hand out to help Rena out, but a jellyfish stung it. Brandon screamed. Rena got up.

"Are you okay?" Rena asked.

"Get him to the infirmary!" Chris shouted. Two interns ran up and took him away.

Later, Michael walked up to Rena.

"Hey." Michael said.

"If you're here to hit on me again, then get lost." Rena said.

"Awww..." Michael said. "That hurts."

Meanwhile, Brandon walked up to Rena with roses in one hand and a cast on the other. Just as he saw Rena, Michael grabbed Rena and kissed her.

"Michael is such a traitor." Brandon said in a confessional. "Rena would never like me. Michael was just trying to humiliate me. Guess what? It worked."

Later at the elimination ceremony, the Beavers sat around the campfire. "Since you're new at this, I'll tell you how it works. If I call your name, get a marshmallow." As he called the camper's names they come to the podium and grab a marshmallow.

"Tanya"

"Harpo and Oprah"

"Simon"

"Ernest"

"Kyle"

"Derek"

"Faith"

"Brandon and Rena..."

"With Brandon's hand bandaged up, he's not so useful anymore" Tanya said in a confessional.

"Rena really messed up that last challenge" Kyle said in a confessional.

"The final marshmallow goes to..."

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..

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"Rena"

"I guess I'll go then" Brandon said.

Rena watched in despair as Brandon walked away.

"Yeah, I voted myself off" Brandon said in a confessional. "At least now, I don't have to embarrass myself in front of Rena."

"Will the Sharks keep up their winning streak? Will Brandon find out that Rena thinks Michael is a creep pervert? Find out next time on Total...Drama...Woods!"

Brandon is eliminated.

Trivia

 * Michael, Adam, Ernest, and Brandon use the confessional in this episode.

Chapter 6 - Cirque de Stupide
"Last time on Total Drama Woods. The teams competed in some sports-themed challenges. Michael got a little jealous of Kyle and Brandon, because of their good fortune with girls. Thanks to Adam's treachery, we saw some supermodel boobs. And the Screaming Beavers secured their first win. After, Brandon totally humiliated himself, he was eliminated. Who will be next on Total...Drama...Woods!"

(Theme song)

The two teams were sitting in the mess hall. Derek was in the kitchen. He took a spoonful of his soup and spit it out. Kyle walked in.

"What's up, big guy?" Kyle asked.

"Not much." Derek replied sadly. "I just haven't been able to cook as well since I messed up at the talent show."

"You just need to have confidence in yourself." Kyle said.

"You're right." Derek said. "I'll keep trying."

Meanwhile, Rena was sitting at the table, eating her food sadly.

"I can't believe that creep Michael kissed me." Rena said in a confessional. "And now Brandon's gone. He probably thinks I have no interest in him at all."

"This is what they call a win-win." Michael said in a confessional. "I kissed a hot girl and her only other crusher is gone."

Chris walked into the mess hall. "Attention campers! It's time for today's challenge. You will all compete in circus-themed challenges. There will be three and you can only use a teammate once."

"Let me guess." Michael said. "We have to dress up as clowns."

"You know me so well." Chris said. "You'll have to wear these clown hats and big red noses."

"Fun." Tanya said sarcastically.

"Now get dressed and meet me outside the cabins." Chris said.

Later, all the contestants and Chris met outside the cabins. All of the contestants were wearing clown hats and big red noses. There were 2 standees with the faces cut out and a table full of pies.

"Your first challenge is the pie throw. The player who is picked will be able to pick someone from the opposite team to throw pies at. Each team will get three pies."

"Guys," Rena said. "Let me do this."

"Fine with me." Tanya said.

Meanwhile, the Killer Sharks talked.

"Who wants to do it for our team?" Michael asked.

"I'll do it." Adam said.

"I've had enough of you during the challenges." Michael said. "Whether your not jumping out of planes or ripping off bras with flaming arrows."

"Just give me another chance, dude." Adam pleaded.

"No way." Michael said. "What about you Bianca?"

"Sure." Bianca said.

"This sucks." Adam said in a confessional. "They don't trust me anymore."

"Of course I don't trust him anymore." Michael said in a confessional. "Any challenge he participates in, he screws up for us."

"Okay" Chris said. "Who do you two want to throw pies at?"

"Easy." Rena said. "Michael."

"What?!" Michael exclaimed.

"Okay." Chris said. "What about you Bianca?"

"I don't know." Bianca said. "How about Ernest?"

"Cool." Chris said. "Michael and Ernest stand in the standees."

Michael and Ernest walked over to the standees and put their heads in them.

"This sucks." Michael said.

"I know." Ernest said.

"Shut up!" Michael said.

"Rena, you first." Chris said.

Rena picked up a pie and threw it right at Michael's face. Two more pies hit Michael straight in the face.

"That's what you get for being a pervert." Rena said.

"Bullseye" Chris shouted. "Now for Bianca."

Bianca threw one pie and hit part of Ernest's face. Another one hit right next to his face. The last one hit him in the eye.

"Well, it's obvious that the Beavers win this part of the challenge." Chris said. "Onto the next challenge."

Chris led the two teams to the top of the hill where their are two big balls.

"Your next challenge will be to race will running on these giant balls." Chris explained. "First one down the hill wins."

"Ooh..." Ernest said. "Let me try. I have excellent balance."

"No way, pie face." Faith screamed. "It's my turn."

Meanwhile, the Killer Sharks decided who would do it.

"Let me do it now." Adam said.

"No way!" Michael said. "I'm not going to lose another challenge. Time to handle things myself!"

"Okay so it's Michael vs. Faith." Chris said. "Ready, Set, GO!!!"

The two balls started rolling downhill. Suddenly, mines started exploding.

"What the heck is this?" Michael asked.

One mine exploded right under Michael and he flew through the air. Faith's ball jumped over a giant rock. The two are neck-and-neck.

"Time for a little more action!" Chris said as he pushed a button. Spikes popped out of the ground. Michael dodged the spikes, but Faith ran over them. Her ball popped and she fell off. Michael passed the finish line.

"Michael wins!" Chris said. Michael skidded to a stop and did a backflip off of the ball.

"That's how you do it." Michael said.

"Follow me to the last challenge." Chris said.

Chris led the two teams to two cliffs connected by two thin ropes.

"The last challenge is to unicycle over these shark-invested waters." Chris said. "The first one over will win and the last one will have to vote someone off."

"Man, this is where I shine." Oscar said. "Unicycle, skateboard, no difference."

"Since you're one of the only ones on the team I still trust." Michael said. "Go ahead."

Meanwhile, the Beavers picked their camper too.

"This is crucial." Rena said. "We can't let them win again."

"I could try." Tanya said doubtfully.

"Okay, we have Oscar and Tanya." Chris said. "Let's go!"

The two started slowly and carefully, until Oscar started to speed up. Tanya started to speed up too, but she fell off. She grabbed onto the rope and started moving along. Oscar started spinning around in the middle of the rope.

"Show off!" Tanya shouted.

"Just hold on, Tanya!" Adam shouted.

"Who's team are you on?" Michael asked.

"I just don't want anyone to get hurt." Adam said.

Michael pulled out a knife. "Well, I don't care."

Michael cut Tanya's rope with the knife. Tanya started swinging toward the wall of the cliff. She crashed into the side and started climbing up.

Adam tackled Michael and started punching him.

"What is wrong with you?" Adam screamed.

Michael flipped Adam over and started punching him. 7-Up ran over and spread them apart.

"Come on dudes." 7-Up yelled. "We're on the same team!"

"Chris!" Adam screamed. "We should be disqualified."

"Please." Chris yelled. "They were going to lose anyway."

"You seriously don't know what team you're on, do you?" Michael said.

"The Killer Sharks win!" Chris shouted.

"Chris!" Michael shouted. "Can you shut up for two seconds?"

Michael turned toward Adam.

"You haven't done anything for our team." Michael said. "In fact it seems that everything you've done is for their team."

Tanya and Rena stared at each other worriedly.

"If you don't think that I will vote you off, you're dead wrong." Michael said.

"I promised Tanya that I would make sure Adam would not be eliminated." Rena said in a confessional. "And I don't break my promises."

"Hey!" Rena shouted. "Pervert!"

Michael turned around to Rena.

"At least he's trying. Maybe he messes up, but he's a good teammate. And unlike you he cares about people."

"Whatever." Michael said. "Carry on, Chris."

"Right." Chris said quickly and uncaring. "Sharks win. Beavers vote someone off at the most dramatic, not really, elimination ceremony yet."

Later, Michael met up with Jamie.

"Next challenge." Michael said. "Adam is gone."

"But I promised him we wouldn't vote him off." Jamie said.

"Who's we?" Michael asked.

"The alliance" Jamie said.

Michael tried to hold in his anger. "Jamie," he said. "The alliance is a secret!"

"Oh..." Jamie said.

"Michael's so smart!" Jamie said in a confessional.

"Jamie's such an idiot!" Michael said in a confessional.

Later, the Beavers sat around the campfire. "Okay, let's start." As he called their names, they got up and got a marshmallow.

"Simon"

"Rena"

"Kyle"

"Harpo and Oprah"

"Derek"

"Ernest"

"The final marshmallow goes to..."

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"Tanya"

"WHAT?!" Faith screamed.

"You did mess up the ball challenge." Ernest said.

Faith slammed Ernest against a tree.

"Security!" Chris yelled.

Four interns came up and grabbed Faith and dragged her down the Dock of Shame

"Y'all are going to regret this!" Faith screamed.

"Will Michael kill Adam? Will Rena kill Michael? Will Tanya help Rena kill Michael? And will Adam survive long enough to help the two of them? Find out next time on Total...Drama...Woods!"

Trivia

 * Rena, Michael, Adam, and Jamie use the confessional in this episode.