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After TDWT, budget cuts were made due to all the lawsuits, cover ups, and failed Chris McLean dolls that were made. Instead of trying to find a sensible and economic solution, Chris fired Chef Hatchet so he could hire a crazy fan who would work harder than any crew member for low pay. He found the perfect girl after noticing her stalking him and his cat. He sent her to find some new contestants, pick old ones, come up with a season idea and generate fan buzz while he watched Jersey Shore and got plastic surgery. And this odd, creepy, strange, weird and kinda lazy fan did that. In her own "special" way.
A tropes page can be found here
Characters
Staff
Chris Mclean- Our Self Absorbed Diva, But Lovable, Host
Rhonda- The Stalker Fan/Co-Host/Assistant/Chef
Jenny- The Mischievous Girl/Aftermath Host
Toby- Jenny's Sidekick/Aftermath Host
Contestants
All The Total Drama What The Heck Contestants! Designed by Reddy.
Old Contestants;
Bridgette- The Surfer
Courtney- The CIT
DJ- The Brickhouse With A Heart
Duncan- The Punk
Geoff- The Party Dude
Gwen- The Loner Goth
Heather- The Queen Bee
Justin- The Hot Guy
LeShawana- The Sista
Lindsay- The Dumb Blonde
Noah- The High IQ
Sierra- The Uber Fan
Trent- The Cool Musician
New Contestants;
Chef- The Angry and Former Chef
Julie- The Disturbed Crazed Insane Psycho Chick With A Love For Chaos and Fanfictions
Barbie- The Ironically named Goth
Rosamond- The Crazy Goth Cat Lady
SG- The Shy Technopath
Jovi- The Smarty Pants
Collin- The Annoying Moron
Bradley- The Manipulative Jock
Nellie- The Negative Girl
Mikey- The Funny Hyperactive Guy
Taylor- The Broken Hearted Country Girl
Cosmic River- The Gentle Hippie
Chapter 1 Prepare For Take-Off!
At an airport somewhere in Toronto, Chris McLean, the somewhat famous TV show host, is sitting on a lawn-chair behind a fancy silver jet. He turns his head and flashes a smile to the camera. "Hello," he states in the usual, somewhat excited but not thrilled tone TV hosts use. "And welcome to my new show...."
"Don't you mean 'our show!’ " A voice interrupts.
Out from the plane jumps a young teenage girl, a bit frumpy and plain, but full of emotion. She glares at Chris.
"Sorry," Chris replies with an insincere tone. "You know I'm used to doing this on my own, Rhonda ." Rhonda's face changes into a happy, gleeful face.
"I totally forgive you," Rhonda replies. "I'm just nervous. This is my first time on TV and I'm afraid I'll mess up."
"Apology accepted," Chris replies. "Everyone meet my new co-host, the creepy but lovable, Rhonda!" Chris says to the audience, and he motions to the camera.
Rhonda waves towards the camera. "This is so weird, it's like talking to no one."
"You get used to it," Chris replies.
A screeching noise is heard off in the distance.
“The first bus!" Rhonda squeals. A yellow run-down bus shows up, producing a thick cloud of smog. The two co-hosts proceed to cough before heading towards the bus.
"Last time on Total Drama, Heather won but, lost her money to Zeke, who then fell in a volcano that erupted. Luckily we all got off the island!" Chris says.
"Didn't Alejandro win?" Rhonda asks.
Chris shrugs his shoulders. "Depends on where you live. Since then we've been on hiatus, with a few attempts at new seaons that never panned out. But the rights to the show belong to a new network, who are now producing this new season, for fans just like you!"
"While we liked some ideas from last season, it wasn't perfect," Rhonda states. "So we're going to do it a bit different this time!"
"Let's start by introducing our returning contestants," Chris says. "All they've brought all kinds of baggage back to the show. Now please put your hands together for last season's winner, Heather! < Heather stops off the bus glaring. She flips her hair, now grown back to full length. She's wearing a new outfit, a shorter red top and new jean shorts, a couple inches shorter than usual; She was definitely trying to show she was a femme fatale. She eyes up Rhonda.
Rhonda sticks forward her hand. "Hi, I'm Rhonda, I'm the new co-host of the show and I'm a big-"
"So she's the new Chef?" Heather questions. "I suppose she'd look better in a dress. Barely."
"Care to comment on the rumors about you and Alejandro, Heather?" Chris asks.
Heather laughs. "False obviously! Do you really think I'd be with that wannabe.
Heather grabs Chris by his shirt collar and hisses, "Let me make this clear right now Chris McLean; I'm the real villain of this show, and I'm not going to fall for just any old pretty boy."
She drops the host and marches on.
"Well..." Rhonda murmurs. "How about we meet the winner of season two, who lost all his money their raccoon tore it. Its our punk and every ravioli pixie's dream boy, Duncan!"
"And his current girlfriend, Gwen," Chris adds, brushing himself off.
The goth couple walk off the bus hand in hand. They both wear green clothing with environmental messages printed on them. Most noticeably, Duncan now has some teal in his mohawk while Gwen has bright green mixed into her streaks.
"Still a couple, eh?" Chris asks.
"Yes; I'm with Gwen now and nothing can change that," Duncan states, before turning to the camera. "Especially fan letters written to me."
"People just need to face it that we're together," Gwen adds. "Personally, it's one of the happiest things in my life right now, and I'd like it if everyone respected that."
A groan is heard as Courtney charges out of the bus, knocking down the couple. She looks pretty much like she previously did.
"Let's not forget Duncan's ex, Courtney!" Rhonda yells. "You didn't want to wear something new to the show?"
"This is new," Courtney replies. "They're obviously lighter shades than my usual ensemble."
"Duh Rhonda," Chris states. "So Courtney, what's new with you?"
"I'm no longer a CIT," Courtney replies. "I'm now... a fully trained counselor."
She stands there smugly, waiting for a reaction. Cricket chirping is heard.
Courtney stomps off shouting, "Well, it's more than most of you will ever accomplish."
Suddenly, Rhonda squeals and rushes to the bus, hugging new arrival Sierra. Sierra looks mostly unchanged, her hair mostly grown back and still purple and her usual ensemble.
"Rhonda, why are you here?" Sierra asks.
"I'm the new co-host of season four," Rhonda replies. "Since a lot of fan support went into making this season, they decided to let a fan co-host. It's also why Sierra is here; as a reward fans got to vote for a returning player and Sierra was that player."
"Don't remind me," Chris mumbles. "So you two know each other?"
"We're fellow Total Drama fans," Sierra states. "Plus, she follows my blog. She’s even helped her get a lock of Cody's hair!" Rhonda and Sierra stop hugging and separate.
"Glad to see you're still obsessed with someone who isn't even here. I'm sure that'll be very entertaining."
Stepping off the bus is Noah, dressed in a new sweater and wearing familiar looking bracelets.
"Nice to have back our real fan-favorite Noah," Chris states, holding his hand out.
"Wonderful to be back," Noah replies, walking by Chris.
>Next of the bus is Lindsay, who looks confused as ever. She's wearing sky blue boots and a new, hot pink outfit, but keeps her signature bandana.
"Okay, this seems familiar yet different than I remember it," Lindsay states. "Is this still World Tour?"
"It's a new season Lindsay," Chris answers. "Speaking of, how are you and Tyler? I've heard there has been some trouble in paradise?"
"Who?" Lindsay asks.
Chris sighs as Lindsay leaves, as Trent steps out the bus. His face has no expression, and he wears black clothing along with shorter hair. He seems to be growing a goatee.
“And everybody’s favorite contestant (besides those who thought he was boring or offensive for his OCD like behavior),” Rhonda states. “Trent! I heard you were going to release your first solo album. When can we expect it?”
Trent sighs. “Not anytime soon, but thanks for asking. I’m glad to know people still-“
The swooning of many females as Justin arrives interrupts Trent. Justin wore no shirt, revealing his twelve pack. He also wore short khaki shorts. He flexed his pecs, and even the guys had to avert their eyes. Clearly, Justin found and brought his sexy back.
Trent walks on as Justin goes by, and Geoff and Bridgette exit together, making out. They looked mostly the same, but Bridgette’s hoodie was now pink and Geoff’s open shirt was now light blue. Geoff also seemed to be growing a small beard. Both wore promise rings on their fingers.
“And here’s everyone’s formally least favorite couple till Gwen and Duncan,” Chris states. “Gidgette; separately their Bridgette and Geoff.
The two look up at Chris. Bridgette frowns but Geoff chuckles.
“I like the beard,” Rhonda says.
“Huh?” Geoff replies.. “…Oh, I didn’t even realize that man. I guess I forgot to shave.”
“Where’s your luggage?” Rhonda asks.
“I think we forgot it too,” Bridgette sighs.
“I feel like I’m forgetting something else,” Geoff states. “…Oh well, if it was important I wouldn’t forget it.”
“Like your luggage,” Noah states.
Next to exit was DJ, who waved at everyone. He wasn’t wearing hat, letting his hair out that was done up, likly by his mother. His pet Bunny sat upon his shoulder.
“Welcome back DJ,” Chris greets. “And your pet. I got to ask, given your track record with animals…”
“I’m no longer cursed,” DJ interrupts. “My mama knew a friend who removed the curse. As such, I thought I’d bring Bunny back; he was a good luck charm for me in TDI. And I’m positive I can take care of him.”
“Doesn’t he remember that Bunny was flung around in the losers resort?” Rhonda whispers.
“No one remembers what happened on this show,” Chris shot back as DJ took his place.
Finally, Leshawna exited, spotting a flashy pair of new earrings and bracelets on her wrists.
“Hey y’all!” She greeted, not even caring to glare at Heather.
“Good to have you back Leshawna, how have you been?” Chris inquires, not bothering to hold in a yawn.
Leshawna didn’t even take notice. “I’ve been great. A record company has given me a record deal! Leshawna is now musician y’all!”
Many of the contestants clap for Leshawna.
“That’s not even close to be a counselor,” Courtney mumbles to herself.
“So where’s the old cook?” Duncan questions. “Off dropping a kidney stone or something.”
Chris points at Rhonda. “We had some budget troubles, so I decided to lose him and hire someone stupider and less good looking who will to do twice as much work.”
"That's me! " Rhonda chrips. "Wait…"
But Rhonda has no time to think, as another old bus pulls up, driven by a redheaded intern.
"What's with the new bus?" DJ asks.
"EEEEEEEEEE!" Rhonda yelps. "This bus has our new contestants!"
"New ones?" Heather asks. "The new ones always suck!"
"Thanks for that," Sierra says.
The redheaded intern steps off the bus and hands Chris a clipboard. Rhonda hovers over his shoulder and squeals.
“We got twelve whole people!” Rhonda cheers.
“Let’s see what new blood you got,” Chris states to Rhonda, as he climbs in the bus.
"Okay," Rhonda replies, turning her head to the returning contestants. "Are you all excited for the new season?"
Most shrug their shoulders, while Sierra jumps up and down. "What's the show's new name?" she asks.
"I don't actually know," Rhonda replies. "Hey Chris, what's the show's name?"
"What The Heck?" Chris yelps.
"Total Drama What The Heck? I like it," Rhonda replies.
Chris runs off the bus with a girl on his head, looking through his scalp.
Just let me get it.”
“Stay out of my hair!”
"I just want to pick this fuzz out of it and put it in my tummy using my mouth!"
The girl proceeds to flip Chris over and grab a small fuzz ball off him.
"Delicioso!" she states eating it.
“You eat fuzz?” Leshawna asks. “Doesn’t that taste… nasty gross?”
"On the contrary, it tastes great," the girl states. "In my MIND."
“What mind,” Noah whispers.
Ha, ha, you're funny," the strange girl fake laughs. "You know what else is funny?"
“What?” Noah replies.
The girl grabs Noah by the collar. “When I torture you and your stupid soul in my chamber of murder. Then I'll blow you up! Then I'll laugh as no one comes to your funeral because NO ONE LOVES YOU! But… I love you Noah," she states as she pushes his face into her chest.
“And I'll always love you. I'll marry you, and we'll move into a crystal dream fairy tale palace, where we'll ride magic My Little Ponies and play shuffleboard. And we'll have a hundred kids with names I won't take the time to remember. Then, will fly away on my jet into the moon, where we'll eat I Can't Believe It's Not Butter and watch Jersey Shore cause we're that awesome. Then…I die.”
"Get off of me," Noah yells pushing her away.
"LOVE ME! LOVE ME! COWS MAKE MILK! " The girl cries out as she starts to tear up.
"UGH I don't like you!" she screams at Duncan, as she kicks him in the nuts. She then angrily arm flails and yells gibberish. "Glad to see you could make it, Julie," Rhonda states.
"You know I wouldn't miss this adventure for anything!" Julie replies
The crazy girl is a cluster of purple; she wears a lavender shirt and a purple skirt, and even has mismatched eyes; a purple eye and a lavender one.But her hair is perhaps the most odd thing about her. It was lavender with purple streaks, and seemed somehow natural. It is twisted into two braids that reached all the way to her hips.
"Well, let's meet our next contestant." Chris states, brushing himself off.
A kid with long blonde messy hair, lime green eyes and a peace medallion steps off the bus. He wears a tie dye bandanna and rainbow tie dye shirt along with torn jeans and no shoes. "Like nice to meet you groovy cats. I hope we can all be pals," he says.
"You ready for this season Cosmic River?" Chris asks.
“I hope so,” the hippie replies. “I’m wanting to win these funds for the caterpillars.”
“Caterpillars?” Leshawna asks.
Cosmic River nods. “Totally! I mean, a lot of them are dying out, as a result of pesticides, pollution, deforestation, and so much else! Not to mention a natural part of life. ”
"Good luck with that," Chris states half-heartedly.
"Thanks mannnnnnnnnnnnnn," Cosmic River replies.
"Now let's meet… Taylor!" Rhonda yells. A brunette girl wearing a cowgirl hat that has brown eyes steps off the bus. She wears a yellow top and jean shorts along with brown cow girl boots. Her mascara is running.
"Hi," Taylor replies with a depressed tone.
"Whats wrong with her?" Justin asks.
"Her boyfriend, since childhood, cheated on her with her greatest rival and then dumped her for the other girl," Rhonda replies.
Taylor starts to burst out in tears. "WHY? WHY? I WAS A GREAT GIRLFRIEND! AND I LOVED HIM! WHY IS FATE SO CRUEL!!!!" she screams with agony as she falls to her knees and looks up into the sky.
Everyone steps away.
"Get over yourself," Heather states.
Taylor takes a deep breath and stands with the rest, wiping away tears.
"Now let's meet the world's biggest pest, Collin," Rhonda says with annoyance.
A kid with a head bigger than his scrawny body and blonde hair sticking up is shown. He wears a black sweatshirt and gray sweats and green sneakers.
"Hi, everybody!" he states in an annoying voice.
"Nerd," Duncan states.
"Hey, you're funny," Collin says in annoyance as he gives a creepier laugh.
"Get lost," Duncan says pushing him.
"Now, let's meet Jovi!" Rhonda says. A girl with auburn hair and brown eyes walks out. She wears a pink shirt and jean capris and is short in height.
"Hello," the new girl greets. It's a delight to be here. I'm hoping this show will be considerably fun and I hope we can all be preeminent friends."
"You're a big fan of the show?" Chris asks.
"Since the premiere," Jovi replies.
Chris smirks. "Will change that."
Jovi rolls her eyes. "Ever since the first season your popularity has been waning Chris; it's not hard to see why. You've become more of a cardboard caricature and a.."
"Look," Chris interrupts. "Here's our shy computer wiz, SG!"
A blushing, brunette, bespectacled boy arrives, wearing an orange sweatshirt with a slightly muscular frame.
"Hi," he mumbles, and quickly speed walks away from the screen.
"Okay," Rhonda says. "Now everyone meet, Rosamond!"
As soon as Rhonda finished, 4 black cats of different sizes scurry off the bus.
Following them was a tall girl with messy long black hair, black beady eyes and pale skin. She's wearing a red long-sleeved sweater, black skin tight pants, and small shined shoes with buckles. She did not look hungry or tired. She just looked strange.
"Hello, everyone!" she said in a medium-sized, yet strange voice. "Let me introduce you to my cats. The big one is BeetleJuice, the big medium one is Wednesday, the small medium one is Vincent and the tiny one is Coraline."
"I so care," Heather replies. "Why do you even have cats?"
"You're allowed to bring pets but they aren't our responsibility," Chris states.
"Nice to meet you, Rosamond," Gwen says, sticking out her hand. Rosamond grabs it and shakes.
"Now let's meet Bradley!" Rhonda says.
Now exiting the bus was a tall, muscular man. He wears a red variety football jacket with a bulldog on it. He has blue eyes, blonde hair and perfect white teeth, which he used to flash a smile.
"Hi," he greets.
"Hi!" Lindsay replies, obviously attracted to him.
"Lindsay, you have a boyfriend. Tyler, remember?" Trent says.
"Who?" Lindsay replies.
Trent facepalms as Bradley walks over to the others.
"While you figure out who Tyler is, let's all put on our happy faces for Nellie," Rhonda yells.
A girl with long messy brown hair and dark blue eyes is shown. She has a gray shirt with a dead daisy on it. She wears long jeans and white sneakers. She is frowning. She looks at the contestants. She then turns to Rhonda and Chris.
"Wow, another reality show that has nothing new or helpful and is self exploitive."
"Excuse Me?" Leshawna yells.
Nellie turns to Rhonda. "Can we leave this crappy airport and get on your cheap jet and go to whatever smelly, disease-ridden and infested place we're suppose to go to?"
"Now until we meet all the contestants," Rhonda replied. "So, let's now meet Mikey!"
A short kid in cargo pants and a green jacket runs off the bus in a hurry, yelling wildly. His hood is in the shape of the triceratops complete with three horns. He has messy blonde hair, green eyes and lime green sneakers.
"Woooooo! I'm on TV! This is gonna be awesome!!! Wooooooooooo!"
"Awesome," Geoff states. "Another dude who knows how to have fun!" He and Mikey high-five.
"Now let's meet Barbie," Rhonda says, with a little shame in her voice.
An extremely fat, pale girl slowly walks off the bus. She has dark brown hair and deep brown eyes. She wears a dark black dress like that of Morticia Adams. She also has big black platform high-heels that only add to her already large height and spider shaped earrings.
"What is that?" Bradley asks with big eyes.
"That is Barbie," Rhonda replies, annoyed.
"She needs a makeover," Lindsay says.
Rhonda, ignoring her, asks Barbie, "How are you, Barbie?"
Barbie only sighs. She then picks up her luggage and stands with the rest of the contestants. Most slide away.
"And last but not least…" Rhonda begins, "...Chef!"
An angry Chef steps off the bus.
"Chef is a contestant!" Chris asks in shock.
"Yup," Rhonda replies. "My friend talked me into adding him and it did seem like a great way to score ratings."
"And you joined?" Sierra asks.
"I need the money maggot!" Chef yells. "Plus I wanted to see who was my replacement," Chef grunts and says, "I can't believe I got replaced by this frumpy little worm."
"What did you say, you slow old no-talent has-been cook?" Rhonda replies.
"Settle down," Chris says. "Now that we're all here, let's get on the new Total Drama Jumbo Jet!" He points to a shiny silver expensive jet.
The contestants gasp.
"How could you afford this?" Duncan asks.
"We were picked up by a new, richer network," Chris replied. "It's very expensive, so let's try and not blow up this one," Chris finishes, giving a glance at Sierra.
"Let's give you guys a tour!" Rhonda says.
The scene changes to the inside. "Everything has been made to look like the old jet," Rhonda says. The contestants understand as they see that the winner bunking area, loser bunking area, cafeteria, elimination room, bathroom and cargo hold are all the same. "But we do have new rooms for me and Chris," Rhonda adds.
"Like last time there will be three teams, and whoever wins gets to stay in the upperclass section," Chris states.
"Do we have to sing?" Gwen asks.
"Well," Rhonda begins, "I think the singing is a bad idea. But Chris wants to see what it will be like. So for your first challenge you'll all have to sing your first and hopefully last song on the show. Each person must sing a line or leave. The best singer gets an advantage in the next challenge. The worst gets a disadvantage. That singer will be determined by me, Chris and guest judges."
The contestants all groan.
"Shut up and sing!" Chris yells.
THE LAST SONG
(Note this is written in script format for ease. Quotations mean there's talking)
Bridgette: This stinks. We all have to sing again.
Heather: All thanks to that creeper and that 40 year-old has-been.
Geoff: It doesn't matter 'cause me or Bridge are gonna win.
Noah: I admit this plane is better than the last.
Heather: But this singing is so in the past. It's dumb and lame. And everyone sounds the same. But I'm not surprised they came up with a bad idea.
Nellie: I hope I'll soon be out of here.
Justin: You're just upset that you can't sing. But I can. 'Cause I'm the man.
Cosmic River: Don't listen to the man. Be free like the wind. Be groovy like the trees. Dance to the Bee Gees!
Julie: "TOO MUCH BEE GEES!"
Courtney: Be quiet you nut. Or I'll kick your butt. This show sucks thats for sure. It's almost as bad as my cheating ex and that wh…
Rhonda: "Don't Cuss!"
Gwen: Shut up you jealous witch.
Duncan: Yeah quit being a bi…
Rhonda: "I said don't cuss!"
Julie: This is gonna be crazy. That's why it will be fun. I hope someone's mother dies! I hope random hobos cry! I wanna a pizza! Nothing rhymes with Pizza! I like to eat other people's toenails!
Rhonda: "This song fails."
Julie: Keep your chin up old bean! No need to get mean. Let's just fly away and wave our hair back and forth. Then wear pajamas! Then kill British llamas. Rhyming is hard. How does Lemmie do it? Oh well, who cares. Let's blow up Care Bears!
Nellie: "What is your problem?"
Julie: "I took some weird pills before I came here."
Mikey: This is gonna be so cool!
DJ: That poor fool.
Sierra: I wish Cody was here.
Julie: I wish Toady was here but I guess I'll settle for this deer! (a random deer appears)
Deer: "Moo."
Nellie: "Deers don't say moo." (The deer randomly jumps out of the window)
Bradley: This show is crazy! It's making me hazy!
Heather: Get used to it. It only gets worse, especially when you're hit. (glares at LeShawna)
LeShawna: Oh, shush girl. Your face looks better without a tooth…
Trent: Though it still makes me want to hurl.
Lindsay: I hope things will be a piece of pie! Maybe 'll get a new guy! (looks at Bradley)
DJ: Poor Tyler, dude will be so sad.
Chef: I feel so mad! Those snooty cheap producers cut me from the show! And then replaced me with someone so slow! I mean look at that troll! She'll ruin the show and the producers will have to pay the toll.
Rhonda: Oh, shut up! And SG you need to sing!
SG: La. (blushes) (Rhonda face-palms)
Taylor: I'm so depressed. Why did Joe break up with me? Why did he? (falls to the floor and bursts into tears. SG scoots away)
Collin: "I want to sing!" La, La, La...
Rhonda: "Shut up Collin! And Barbie you need to sing!"
Barbie: (blinks and does not say nor sing anything)
Jovi: Come on everybody, lighten up! We're on TV and thinks this will be fun! Don't withdraw! Don't be done!
Rosamond: I agree with Jovi! Don't be so sad! Don't be so mad! Everything will be fun and fair. Suck it up and grow a pai…
"Thank you Rosamond," Rhonda interrupts. "But you guys are done. Me and Chris have heard enough and decided that no singing will ever happen again. We will now go talk to the judges and tell you who won and who did the worst."
"What about Barbie?" Bradley asks. "She didn't sing."
"I wouldn't have either after hearing some of y'all," Rhonda states. "That's why she is not eliminated."
The other contestants groan.
Barbie sighs.
"But she will get a disadvantage like the worst singer," Rhonda adds.
"Good," Bradley replies.
Barbie doesn't appear to react.
"Well, we'll reveal the winner next episode on Total Drama…" Chris begins. "Rhonda, what name did we decide on?"
"Total Drama What The Heck!" Rhonda yells.
"What?" Chris asks.
The episode ends.
Chapter 2 Jungle Fever
Chris and Rhonda are shown in the front of the plane like an average TDWT episode. Rhonda is flying the plane with her knees bending up in the seat. She has on a dumb face and is sticking her tongue out, like when a kid spins around in circles pretending to be a plane.
"Last time on Total Drama What The Heck?" Chris begins, "We met our returning and debuting contestants including Chef Hatchet."
"Don't forget about our gorgeous and hot co-host," Rhonda adds.
"Who?" Chris asks.
Rhonda replies only with a freaked out face that might remind you of a meme or something similar.
"Well, that certainly is the face of a gorgeous and hot co-host," Chris states.
Rhonda closes her eyes and…Bam! Chris gets wacked by a frying pan.
"What The Heck?" Chris replies.
"We showed them the inside of the plane... which is just like the old one," Rhonda contiunes. "Then they sang and the song sucked. We will NOT do anymore songs. Anyway, Barbie didn't sing so she has a penalty against her in the next challenge. We now have to talk to our guest judges and decide who was the best and worst singer."
"Why is it we're up here and not with them?" Chris asks
"I had to set the plane on the right coordinates," Rhonda replies.
"Well, lets go decide the winner already," Chris states as he stands up.
"Sure thing," Rhonda says as she leaves the controls.
"Wait, who will fly the plane?" Chris asks.
"Oh right…" Rhonda recalls. "I forgot to show you that. Bobobo!" she calls in a loud but gentle tone.
Suddenly, a monkey swings in and lands on Rhonda's shoulder.
"What is that?" Chris asks.
"Is this a trick question?" Rhonda replies with a question.
"I'm serious. What is that?" Chris asks.
"Well, that depends. Can you be less vague?" Rhonda asks.
"That," Chris says, pointing.
"My shoulder?" Rhonda asks.
"THE MONKEY!" Chris yells.
"...If you know what it is, why ask?" Rhonda says confused.
Chris facepalms and asks, "Why do you have that monkey?"
"His name is Bobobo," Rhonda replies. "And I need him."
"Why?" Chris asks.
"Well, Bobobo is short for Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo…" Rhonda begins.
"Why do you need the monkey?" Chris asks.
"His name is Bobobo and he is going to fly the plane while I'm gone," Rhonda replies.
"You got a monkey to fly a five star plane?" Chris asks.
"He's better than an inflatable. Besides monkeys fly spaceships to the moon. Heck, I fly the plane and I don't have a license, or even a driver's license," Rhonda points out.
"Well, this is true," Chris states. "But how did you get this monkey?"
Rhonda sighs. "His name is Bobobo and I found him on the streets smoking. He has severe mood swings and has killed a lady on a plane, but is generally okay."
"HE WHAT!?!" Chris yells.
"Don't worry, Chris, he has quit smoking," Rhonda replies, "Come on, lets meet with the judges."
Rhonda pushes Chris towards the door. He turns to see Bobobo pressing random buttons and flinging poo on the windshield.
"Good grief…" Chris mummers as they leave.
(Theme song plays)
The contestants are shown in the cafeteria, bored and waiting for the results. Julie is running around with her arms out like a plane.
"Um, Julie?" Geoff asks.
"Yes, sir-mam," Julie replies.
"What'cha doing?" Geoff questions.
"What are you doing?" Julie asks.
"Why did you answer a question with a question?" Noah asks.
Julie ignores him and runs around in a few more circles before being tripped by Heather and landing on SG's lap. SG blushes while Julie starts to pet his face.
"So yeah your face is pretty soft," she says as she pats his face some more.
SG blushes more and replies, "Thank you?"
"I'm gonna make myself throw up now," Julie states, not leaving SG's lap. She then sticks a finger down her throat and vomits on the floor near SG's shoes.
Heather groans. "I hate this new Izzy; why couldn't we have kept the old one?"
"You know why Izzy isn't here!" Sierra yells angrily.
"No. I don't," Heather replies.
"Gurl, you really don't know what happened to Izzy?" LeShawna questions.
"Even I know what happened," Lindsay adds.
"What happened to Izzy?" Heather yells.
"She was on a tour bus in San Francisco," Sierra began, "When she bugged the bus driver enough that he accidentally went in the wrong lane and almost hit another car. So he turned, and the bus almost fell off the bridge. Izzy fell through the windshield and down into the bay. She was never found."
"What happened to everyone else on the bus?" Heather asks.
"The bus almost fell off, but everyone was able to equal out their weight so it didn't tip over," Sierra replied. "Of course this was after Izzy fell."
"PAY ATTENTION TO ME!" Julie screams, still on SG's lap.
"Can you please get off, Julie?" SG asked.
"But it's so warm up here," Julie replies, making SG blush. "Like a kitten's belly or a double cheeseburger from McDonalds when you don't know how bad it really is for you."
Julie is then shown in the confessional. "So, I noticed no one has used the confessional, so I decided to! Got a problem with it?" Julia then laughs and yells, "Eat that Gwen, Lindsay and LeShawna! So anyway, uh…. thanks Toad, the cake is a lie, Vote Pedro, Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Batman...oh and go read great fanfictions on Total Drama Fanfiction Wiki!"
The camera turns away from Julie and turns to Rosamond, who is brushing Wednesday, who sits on the table with the rest of the cats.
"Your cats are so darling," Jovi states, scratching Wednesday's ear.
"Thank you!" Rosamond replies happily.
BeetleJuice coughs up a large, vomit-covered hairball on Jovi's face and lets out an obnoxious burp.
"Oops, seems BeetleJuice is having indigestion," Rosamond laughs petting BeetleJuice. "Sorry, he has poor table manners, but so do all my kooky cats."
"It's fine," Jovi says giggling and wiping her face off with a napkin from the table. "I admit that hairball was certainly abhorrent, but I have a cat myself and she isn't much better."
Rosamond squeals excitedly, "You're a fellow cat owner?"
Jovi nods in agreement.
"Yay! Tell me everything about your cat."
"My cat is named Tabitha..." Jovi begins.
"Let me guess, she's named that because she is a tabby cat?" Rosamond inquires.
Jovi nods in agreement.
"I see it all the time," Rosamond replies while flicking her wrist.
Meanwhile, Barbie is shown sitting at a table in the corner all alone.
"I feel bad for her," Gwen states, looking at her.
"She is super creepy and ugly though," Duncan replies.
Gwen punches his shoulder and he replies with an, "Ow!"
"I thought you said your were gonna be nicer," Gwen says.
"I'm sorry, I should be less judgmental," Duncan says, putting his arm around Gwen's shoulder.
Duncan is shown in the confessional. "After World Tour, I've learned that if I want to be Gwen's boyfriend I have to be a nicer guy. Gwen sympathizes with people and understands how they feel. That is just one of the great things about her. And I want to be nicer. I think…Gwen is changing me. And it's for the better."
"If the two of us, Barbie and that nice Rosamond girl get on the same team, we could form some kind of Goth alliance," Gwen says.
"That would be cool," Duncan adds.
"Duncan's like a melody in my head!" Collin sings, popping out like a weasel around a mullberry bush.
Duncan turns around and yells, "Shut up you moron! It is bad enough you will not leave me and Gwen alone, but you will not stop putting my name in songs, either!"
"I'm just trying to be your friend!" Collin yells.
"He doesn't want to be yours, Collin!" Justin adds.
"Hey, Duncan, what if you woke up and I was your next door neighbor?" Collin dumbly asked.
"Shut up!" Gwen screams.
"Everyone settle down!" Chris says as he and Rhonda walk in, while a redheaded intern pull out a white table and three chairs.
"We have decided on a winner," Rhonda says.
"About time," Bradley complains.
"To tell you the winner and loser, please welcome our guest judges," Chris states. "Former American Idol judges Randy Jackson, Paula Abdul and Simon Cowell!"
"How did you get actual famous people on this third rate show?" Heather asks.
"I got them!" Rhonda replied excitedly.
"How did that creepy, no-life, Sierra wannabe get the judges of American Idol? I doubt she could get a monkey on this show," Heather asks, shocked.
"Oh. No. You DON'T want to mess with me. You'll regret it," Rhonda states while glaring.
"Oh, I'm so scared of Chris's short sidekick with a shorter attention span," Heather laughs. "Why don't you do us all a favor and drown in a lake."
"You. Little. Witch. You have brought down my wrath, wraith like a honey badger. And you will pay. I will torture you, until you break down and beg for mercy. And I'll show you none! You have made a powerful enemy today. So I hope you're prepared to die you coldhearted, hated, snotty, little…"
But before Rhonda can finish, Chris pushes her down. "Anyway, the winner is...Rosamond!"
"Me?" asks Rosamond shocked. "I'm a horrible singer."
"No, you were actually very incredible, though a little eerie," Chris replies.
"You were really great, Rosamond," Jovi states. Rosamond's cats meow in agreement.
"Thanks," Rosamond responds, blushing.
"But don't take our word for it," Rhonda states, dusting herself off. "Hear from our judges! What did you think, Randy?"
"Yeah, yeah dog, I was diggin it, yeah," Randy begins.
"I prefer it if you would call me cat," Rosamond interrupts.
"It was all-right, it was all-right, like a hot pocket. The more I think about it the more I like it, dog," Randy adds.
"What about you, Paula Abdul?" Rhonda asks.
"Rosamond you were just so, just, you were, you were…" she randomly starts slowly clapping with her hands above her head like a seal. "You inspire me to be a better person, Rosamond.
You complete me and motivate me. I say you're going to Hollywood! And you're just so... so…. you're just so confident. Like an… like some analogy. Woo!"
"Oh, so the challenge is in Hollywood!" Lindsay screams out loud.
"No, it's not," Rhonda replies.
"And you, Simon?" Chris asks.
"The minute you walked on that stage, I knew you were destined to be a bloody star," Simon replies while touching his weird chest air.
"Don't lie, Simon!" Paula yells.
"Paula," Simon begins, "you are the most trashy and filthy..."
"Blah Blah, I'm British and love my chest hair, and hate Natalie Okri, blah!" Paula yells. "And I'm super jealous of Paula's awesome skillz cause I'm old, lonely and smell like…. bad smells, and drink tea and eat crumpets and blah! That was you Simon."
"Oh, bloody shut up you crackpot!" Simon yells.
"Blah, blah and I smell and teapots and Nanny Mchpee and Mary Poppins and I want Paula bad, blah, but Paula won't go for you cause she is a much classier girl, BLAH!" Paula screams.
"Thanks, judges," Rhonda replies sarcastically. "Rosamond will receive her advantage when we land. Now the worst signer was clearly...Collin."
"Wait, Rhonda?" Collin asks.
"Yes?" Rhonda asks.
"I was listening and stuff, but um, what happens if you're the worst signer?" Collin questions.
Rhonda facepalms, "You get a disadvantage at the challenge."
"Where is the challenge?" Collin asks.
"WE HAVEN'T LANDED YET!" Rhonda yells.
"Will you tell me?" Collin asks.
"NO!" Rhonda yells. "No, as the worst singer…."
"But wait, I was listening and stuff, but am I the worst singer?" Collin questions.
"KICK IN THE NUTS!" Julie screams, and kicks Collin in the nuts.
Rhonda and Julie high-five.
"Now judges, tell us about Collin and his sucky singing," Rhonda states. "Randy, what do you think?"
"Dog, I wasn't really diggin it," Randy replies. "Yeah, it was like a dog being run over by a dead dog, dog, yo."
"And you, Paula?" Chris asks.
"Even I don't have a nice thing to say to him or about that singing," Paula states.
"Simon?" Rhonda asks.
"I hated it," Simon yells. "Words can't describe how bad that was, though I'll try: abysmal, abhorrent, abominable, heinous, horrid, hideous, repellent, repugnant, repulsive, revolting, odious, and all together... not very good."
"So..do you want me to sing?" Collin asks.
"NO!" everyone yells.
"You're so bloody stupid!" Simon yells.
"I talk about blood and have bad teeth and named my clock Ben and eat english muffins and chest hair and so jealous of Paula and freakin blah!" Paula screams.
"Paula…" Simon begins.
"FREAKING BLAH!" Paula screams.
"Paula, if that psychotic stalker hadn't held us all at gunpoint, I would never talk to you!" Simon yells.
"You held them at gunpoint?" Chris asks.
"Yeah, so?" Rhonda replies. "It's not really a big deal."
"What is a big deal is the messed up, mumbo jumbo that happens inside that nut job's brain!" Simon yells while the other judges nod in agreement.
"And to that I say…" Rhonda starts. "Out the door!" She then opens the door and picks up all the judges, tosses them on the table and flings the three (and the table) out the door. This all happens in about 5 seconds.
"You just got rid of the judges of American Idol!" Trent cries out.
"You just stated the obvious," Julie butts in.
"We don't need them. We have the new cast now," Rhonda replies unfazed.
"But Randy Jackson was one of the new judges!" Trent states.
"Oh," Rhonda replies. "We'll just get Ellen to do it. Besides, most of our audience is Canadian and watches Canadian Idol...probably. And thankfully, these jokes will never become dated."
"Wait, I was listening and stuff but-." Collin begins.
"Oh, shut up." Heather screams.
A light above the doorway goes off and a ping noise is made.
"Looks like we landed," Chris states. "Everyone welcome to… the amazon rainforest in South America!"
The contestants climb out the plane and look around. They are at an airport right in front of the forest. As they look at the rainforest they hear the sounds of birds chirping.
"Ah, how sweet," Bridgette says, with her arm around Geoff.
Then the sound of a large cat growling is heard. Then sounds of the large cat violently gutting the bird are heard.
"Or not," LeShawna states.
"It's the order of nature," Nellie says, unfazed. "That bird would probably die of old age and its carcass would be eaten by other birds. Or the same cat. Or a huge group of ugly, fire ants that would feed it to their queen. She would scarf on all his unused, internal organs and flesh. And what wasn't eaten by the queen ant would be devoured by thousands of the buggers. Maybe some of the recently born, slimly larva would pig out on the scarps. Of course they die as fire ants, if they live to become fire ants. Either way, the fire ants will probably feed their corpses to the queen. Until she dies as well."
"You really know how to lighten up the mood don't you?" Julie asks.
"All right everyone," Chris begins. "For the first part of the challenge you'll have to race through the forest and meet at the river. And yes, you will not be working in teams. You can choose to pair up amongst yourselves, if you wish. First person or pair to get to the river wins a reward for the second and last part of the challenge."
"Take these to help you navigate through the forest," Rhonda states, passing out maps of the forest. She tosses one to Heather that lands in the mud, much to her glee and Heather's anger. After she finishes with the rest of the maps she adds, "And look out for these."
She proceeds to pull out a tiki but in the shape of a barf-bag. "This is an immunity idol that will guarantee immunity at any Barf Bag Ceremony. It can be played before you vote, after you vote and after all the barf bags have been handed out."
"Why would you play it before the results are read?" Sierra asks. "You could just wait to see if you lose and then use it."
"I don't know" Rhonda replies and shrugs. "We just gave you the option in case."
"Now as a reward, Rosamond, you and one friend gets a ten minute head start, while the rest of you pick pairs," Chris states. "Since Collin lost, he will have to wait another ten minutes to go. The same goes for Barbie except she has to wait fiften minutes."
Barbie doesn't react while Collin states, "Wait, I was listening and stuff, but…"
Rhonda proceeds to slap him. "Your more lamer than Ezekiel is. Anyway, Rosamond, do you know who is going with you, or are you going alone?"
Soon most everyone turns Rosamond's direction to see her decision. Some cast hopefuls look or try to give those smiles that say, pick me, Buddy. Justin even flashes a seductive smile.
Rosamond simply laughs. "I hate those kind of people who think they can just act nice and expect a prize they won't pay back. I have to go with my new friend, Jovi."
Jovi (who wasn't trying to get Rosamond to pick her) smiles and asks, "Are you sure?"
"Of course," Rosamond replies. "Now let's go slaughter the competition. With our adorable kitties!" she screams, raising her hands in the air. Her cats rub against her and Jovi in agreement.
"Get ready," Chris says. "And… go!" Soon Rosamond's cats run off followed by Rosamond and Jovi.
"The rest of you, team up!" Chris shouts as the contestants begin mingling.
Sierra runs to Julie and says, "Hey Julie, you wanna team up?"
"No way, I was just thinking the same thing!" Julie shouts. "We'll make the best team ever!"
The girls then jump up and down squealing.
"We just need someone to join us and make us an even awesomer trio!" Julie yells.
"But who?" Sierra asks.
They then slowly turn around with smirks on their faces and look towards Nellie.
"Hey Nellie," Julie states. "What'cha you been up to in the last two minutes?"
"Hating the world and everything wrong with it," Nellie replies.
"Thats fun," Sierra says and proceeds to laugh.
Nellie turns around and glances at them with her eyebrow raised. "What are you…"
"UH!" Julie screams and punches Nellie in the stomach and pulls out a sack. "Get in the SACK!"
"What?" Nellie says, laying on the ground clutching her stomach.
"She said get in the freakin SACK!" Sierra yells slapping her.
"Don't you dare…"
But before Nellie can finish Julie punches her and throws her in the sack.
"YAY!" Julie and Sierra scream in unison.
"Woo," Nellie replies from inside the sack.
"We did it, we did it, we did it, yay!" Julia sings.
"!Lo hicimos! We did it!" Sierra sings too.
"Yeah we crossed the bridge and beat the freakin troll now let me out of this sack," Nellie says.
"Now we're gonna be bestest friends forever!" Julie yells.
"Wonderful," Nellie replies.
Meanwhile Bradley searches for his own group.
"Hey Bradley!" Lindsay says. "Wanna partner up?"
Bradley smirks. "Who wouldn't want to partner up with such a beautiful and smart girl like you?"
Lindsay blushes. "Awww, you're so, like, sweet, Bradley!"
"Thank you," Bradley replies. "Now, for our chances to be good we'll need other people to join us," Bradley states.
"Like who?" Lindsay asks.
"Heather," Bradley calls.
"Eww, why her?" Lindsay says disappointed.
"Because she is great in challenges. Plus, if she joins our team we can make sure she is voted out when we want her to be," Bradley whispers.
"What do you two want?" Heather replies.
"For you to join our group," Bradley states.
"Why?" Heather asks surprised.
"Because you are great at challenges and will be a good ally," Bradley replies. "Right Lindsay?"
"Oh yeah. You're so…awesome," Lindsay lies.
"Well, when you put it like that I guess I'll join you," Heather replies.
Heather is shown in the confessional. "It's about time someone realizes my talents. Perhaps I can use these two to my advantage...it'll be just like old times."
"Now to make sure we win, let's get Chef to join us," Bradley states.
"What?" Heather asks. "We both hate Chef."
"Yes, but Chef is a physically strong competitor," Bradley replies. "Plus we can push Chef in the way if we get attacked."
Lindsay and Heather shrug and then nod. "Oh Chef!" Bradley calls.
Chef walks over and yells, "What do you maggots want?"
"We want you to join our group," Bradley replies. "We'll need your great physical strength if we want to win."
Chef looks at LIndsay and Heather, who put up fake smiles, and nods. "Fine, I'll join you."
"Great," Bradley states.
Bradley is shown in the confessional. "This is perfect! I have Lindsay, Heather and Chef as my allies. If I can get them on my team I'll control it all!"
Meanwhile, LeShawana walks over to Duncan and Gwen. "Girl, would you mind if I joined you?"
"Sure," Gwen replies. "Is it okay with you, Duncan?"
"Sure. Me and LeShawana are tighter now," Duncan states.
"True that," LeShawana says as she and Duncan fist-bump.
Meanwhile, once again Geoff and Bridgette have paired up, when DJ comes over. "Hey Geoff, can I…"
"Say no more, DJ, You can join us, "Geoff answers.
"Thanks man," DJ says.
Then Courtney walks over and asks, "Bridgette, can I join you? ...You're the only friend I have."
"Of course," Bridgette replies. "We'll be working with DJ and Geoff, okay?"
"Sure," Courtney answers. "The more the merrier."
Meanwhile, again Trent and Justin are talking. "Trent, since we were in the same band we should join forces," Justin says.
"Agreed," Trent replies, as they shake hands.
Mikey walks up to Noah and asks, "Hey dude, you want to work together?"
"Hm," Noah said. "Work by myself or with a hyperactive midget? So many choices."
"Wanna work with us, Noah?" Sierra asks.
"I'm losing oxygen in here," Nellie states.
"No," Noah responds.
"JERK!" Julie shouts.
"What about you, Mikey?" Sierra asks.
"I'd love too!" Mikey replies, and joins the other two. "Can I punch the sack?"
"OF COURSE!" Sierra and Julie reply.
Mikey punches it as hard as he can.
"That really didn't hurt," Nellie states. "It didn't have much force due to your small stature."
"You're so nice Nellie," Mikey replies, picking up a stick and whacking the bag with it.
"Ouch!"
"That hurt?" Mikey teases.
"I hate my life," Nellie replies.
Taylor is shown crying. "Why does no one wanna be my partner?"
"Hey, don't cry man," Cosmic River states. "I'll be your partner."
"Really?" Taylor asks sniffling.
"Yay, it will be a gas!" Cosmic River replies.
"Okay," Taylor replies, still sniffling.
SG is shown in the confessional. "I didn't find a partner." He sighs. "I guess no one wanted to go with me."
The teams are all lined up and waiting as Chris looks at his watch. "...go!"
The teams sprint off into the jungle all at once, but as soon they enter they all end up isolated.
Meanwhile, Rosamond and Jovi have stopped and Jovi is looking at the map.
"I knew we shoulda taken that left toin at Albukoikee," Jovi states.
Rosamond is busy staring at a slug. "Aren't you just the cutest banana slug?" She tickles his chin.
"Come on," Jovi says, grabbing her arm. "I found a way back to the correct path. But we have to hustle; the others are probably already out here."
"Okay," Rosamond replies. "Come on, kitties!" Rosamond's cats come and all six run off ahead.
"If we win this there'll be no stopping us!" Jovi squeals. "We'll be indestructible!"
"I know!" Rosamond cheers. "It's purrrr-fect."
"Really?" Jovi asks.
Meanwhile, yet again, Julie, Mikey, Nellie (still in the sack) and Sierra are trying to navigate through the forest.
"This place is soooooooooooo beautiful!" Mikey yells, jumping in puddles and spinning in circles.
"Too bad people will be cutting all of it down," Nellie states.
"Lighten up," Julie says, swinging on tree limbs. She then lands smack in the middle of a spider-monkey and her baby.
"You okay, Julie?" Sierra asks.
"Yup," Julie replies. "This spider-monkey baby broke my fall."
The Fun Bunch notice all the spider monkeys around them...
"Oh no," Sierra gasps. The mother monkey screams and soon huge troops of spider monkeys came around screeching and flinging poo.
"Don't fling feces at me!" Julie screams. "Just cause I do it to you doesn't mean you can do it to me! Do by as I say not by what I do, you butt ugly monkeys!"
The monkeys only get madder and prepare to attack.
"Come on guys," Julie yells. "Lets teach these creeps they can't come to our home turf and not expect a fight."
"Didn't we come to their turf?" Nellie points out.
The three ignore her and make karate action poses. The monkeys launch forward screaming their lungs off in furry. The three yell and spring forward.
Sierra gives a fat, greasy one a roundhouse kick. She then throws a monkey at two others, knocking them off a tree branch. She cracks the back of another yelling, "Eat that you dirty apes!"
Mikey jumps forward and punches one in the face. He then flips around and kicks another in the face.
As he lands, a monkey tries to sneak up on him, but Mikey pops his fist up and knocks the primate out. He then spits and screams, "Any of you other chickens wanna tango with Mikey? Cause you don't want to.."
A monkey jumps forward, lunging at Mikey. Mikey swiftly dodges and grabs him by his tail and flings the spider-monkey at a log causing his head to get stuck, "… I had tango lessons!"
Julie is busying screaming "KICK IN THE NUTS!" and proceeding to kick the monkeys' in their nuts. Five monkeys come lunging at her, but she picks up the sack and bashes them with it.
"Still in here!" Nellie shouts.
Julie then flips onto a tree branch in between two monkeys. She quickly performed a spilt, knocking the two off as they scream.
She then flips higher. Three monkeys lunge for her, but she only cackles crazily and grabs hold of a vine. She swings to the monkeys and BAM! She whoops them with the sack. "Take that Nellie!"
"I hate you, Julie!" Nellie screams.
"I love you, too!" Julie screams.
While that's going on, Rhonda and Chris are watching over Barbie and Collin.
"Collin," Chris begins, "it's time for you to start."
"Yippee!" Collin screams and clumsily runs into the forest. A thud can be heard.
"I hope he gets eaten by a python," Rhonda states. "A really big python."
Meanwhile Chef, Lindsay, Heather and Bradley make their way through the forest. "It's so hot out here," Lindsay states.
"It's not the only thing," Bradley replies. Lindsay blushes while Heather and Chef roll their eyes.
"I did not join this show to listen to you two flirt, so shut your trap and keep moving!" Chef yells.
"What's the point?" Heather says. "We'll never pass Catwoman and her sidekick."
"Unless we take a shortcut," Bradley replies, holding a map and smirking. He shows the others his map and moves his finger along it, pointing out a path. "If we take this way we can get there first."
"Except that way isn't on the path," Heather replies. "We'd have to go deep into the jungle and it's way too thick."
"Not if Chef can cut through it with his knives," Bradley says.
Chef grins and pulls out a knife. He turns left and starts cutting through the grass, making a path that curves forward. Bradley and Heather snicker evilly while Lindsay jumps up and down in joy at their plan.
Later we see Julie, Sierra, Mikey, and Nellie (still in the sack) traveling forward.
"...And then you spit in his eye!" Mikey recaps.
"Yeah, but you're the one who slugged the monkey like 50 feet!" Julie yells. "Not even The Avengers could do that! And that slap fight Sierra had with the mother was classic."
"Thanks, Sierra replies. "LOL, I loved when we played volleyball with that one monkey and you used Nellie to knock it into the mud."
"I didn't," Nellie yells.
All of a sudden the four hear a thud. Peeking though the bushes they see SG alone and wandering the rainforest alone.
"Aw, that poor guy with the soft face is wandering alone," Julie states.
"We should let SG join our group," Sierra says.
"Yeah with five of us it will be a party!" Mikey yells, jumping up and down.
"I don't think I can take another person abusing me," Nellie replies.
"No one asked you, Nellie!" Julie yells, and punches the bag.
"Hello?" SG yells, unaware of the four still in the bushes. Suddenly Julie jumps form the bushes holding Sierra in a headlock.
"If you don't want your twin sister to die, join me on the DARKSIDE!" Julie screams. "We have cookies."
"Do what she says!" Sierra screams. "She has a... Polly Pocket!"
"Poll la la Polly!" Julie sings.
"Um…" SG says.
"Hey you wanna travel with the fun bunch instead of yourself?" Mikey asks.
"Sure," SG says still kinda hesitant.
"YAY!" Sierra and Julie cheer.
"Welcome to the Darkside, SG!" Julie screams, pulling him by his arm. "Are you surprised we lied about the cookies?"
Meanwhile, at The Legion of..., I mean, the plane.
"Barbie you may begin the challenge!" Chris yells.
Barbie sighs and walks slowly into the forest. Soon she is inside. While she studies her map, Barbie trips on a rock and falls into the mud. She picks herself up and then proceeds to strangely bend down over the mud and stare at it…
Later, Jovi and Rosamond are seen rushing out of the jungle near the river. "
We did it, Rosamond!" Jovi cheers.
"Yes!" Rosamond screams. Her cats meow in excitement.
"Yeah, your team got second," Bradley laughs.
Jovi and Rosamond look over and are shocked and saddened to see Bradley, Chef, Heather and Lindsay in front of them.
"Shoot," Rosamond says.
"Sorry, but Bradley's team of him, Chef, Lindsay, and The Wicked Witch got here first," Rhonda clarifies.
"When did you guys get here?" Jovi asks.
"A few minutes before these four did," Rhonda answers. "We took a different path in the opposite direction. But we've had the interns working on the final part of the challenge for a while."
"Well, at least we tried," Jovi states. "And we had a fun time."
"Yeah," Rosamond replies. "And I'm glad I chose you as my partner."
The girls high five each other.
Much later, Collin is seen racing through the forest and coming out in the river. "Yay I won!"
"Actually you came in dead last," Rhonda states. "Even Barbie, who started later, came in before you."
True to her word, all the other contestants were behind her glaring at Collin for making them wait.
"Well, now that we're all here," Chris starts, "we can began the challenge! For the last part of the challenge, you will be fighting on that!"
Chris points to a large pedestal situated firmly in the Amazon River.
"You and two other competitors will have to try and knock one another off of there, and land them into the Amazon River. Last one standing moves on to the next round. The last three standing are guaranteed immunity, and the last one standing of those three gets a reward."
"Since Chef, Lindsay, Bradley, and Miss Piggy won the race, they get the advantage of a helmet and of being able to use a pugil stick," Rhonda says, passing the four those large sticks with foam ends. She hits Heather in the head with her pugil stick. "Now since there are twenty-five of you, four of you will go in the first round. Those four will be Collin, Julie, Chef, and Nellie."
The four get on the pedestal. "Ready…" Chris begins, "…go!"
"People watch other people fight for their amusement," Nellie says (who is out of the bag). "While people all over the world fight to live another day. What is wrong with this world?" She jumps off the pedestal eliminating herself.
"Wait, I was listening and stuff, but…" Collin starts. But before he can finish, Collin is "sadly" pushed into the Amazon River by Chef, who rams him with his pugil stick.
"Guess it's just you and me, purple girl," Chef snickers.
"Nope," Julie replies. She then flips forward and kicks the pugil stick away, and then proceeds to kick him off the pedestal while standing on her hands. "It's just me."
Rhonda claps and says, "Next up is Lindsay, Barbie, and Cosmic River."
The three are shown on the pedestal. "Go!" Chris yells. Barbie sighs and jumps off the pedestal into the Amazon River.
"I don't approve of violence man," Cosmic River says, "so I'm gonna spilt." Cosmic River then jumps into the Amazon River.
Lindsay stares for a moment, then jumps up and down. "I won! EEEEEEEEEE!"
"Ok then," Rhonda states. "Next up is Gwen, Rosamond, and Justin!"
The three, (along with Rosamond's cats), are shown on the pedestal. "Go!" Chris yells.
Rosamond's cat Coraline coughs up a HUGE hairball in the direction of Justin. Justin panics and accidentally jumps off the pedestal. BeetleJuice pounces on Gwen, who falls off into the river.
"Sorry," Rosamond replies. "But good job kitties. We're moving on!"
"Yes, yes you are," Rhonda replies. "Next up, Duncan, Jovi, and Courtney!"
The three are then shown on the pedestal. "Go!" Chris yells.
"You're going down, heartbreaker!" Courtney shrieks, launching herself at Duncan.
"Mommy," Duncan whispers, as Courtney lands on him and gives him a punch in the face. She tears some of his hair out with her bare hands and shoves it down his throat! She then picks him up and spins him in circles before flinging him like a shot put ball.
Courtney gets up and dusts herself off. "That was easy," she says.
"Push," Jovi says, pushing the caught off guard Courtney into the Amazon River.
"Way to use your brain, Jovi!" Rhonda cheers. "Next up, DJ, Bridgette, and Bradley."
"I'll remember that newbie," Courtney mutters to herself.
The three are shown on the pedestal with Bradley, smirking. "Go!" Chris yells.
Bradley quickly charges, using his pugil stick to knock Bridgette off.
"Sorry," Bradley lies, convincingly.
DJ rolls up his sleeves and charges forward. Bradley moves to the side and sticks out his leg. DJ trips and falls into the Amazon River.
"All right, next up is Heather, LeShawana, and Taylor," Rhonda says.
The three are shown on the pedestal. "Go!" Chris yells.
Taylor has a breakdown and runs off the pedestal screaming "WHY DID HE LEAVE ME? OH, WHY!"
LeShawana charges forward and Heather tries to block her using her pugil stick. But LeShawana exerts too much force and causes Heather to fall into the river.
"Oh no, Heather will melt!" Rhonda laughs. "Anyway, next up is Trent, Geoff, and SG!"
The three appear up on the pedestal and get ready to duel. "GO!" Chris yells.
SG stands in the background while Geoff and Trent push each other. Each is holding onto the other and trying to force their opponent off the edge. Trent has got Geoff on the edge when SG appears and pushes the two off into the Amazon River.
"Yay, SG!" Julie cheers, clapping like a seal. SG blushes.
"Finally, Sierra, Noah, and Mikey!" Rhonda calls.
The three appear on the pedestal. "GO!" Chris yells.
Sierra and Mikey look at each other and proceed to rush towards Noah, knocking him off the edge. They turn to each and charge. But Sierra's height gives her the advantage as she knocks Mikey off the edge, who doesn't fight it much...
"And with that, we move on to round two!" Rhonda exclaims. "Since there are only eight of you, we'll have one round of two. Those two will be Jovi and Lindsay!"
The two get on the platform. Lindsay seems confused.
"Go!" Chris yells.
"Wait, how do I use this thing?" Lindsay asks.
While she's distracted, Jovi sneaks up next to her and pushes her off.
"Congrats to Jovi, who makes it to the final round," Rhonda says. "Next up, Julie, Sierra, and LeShawana!
The three get ready to start.
"Go!" Chris yells.
Sierra and Julie look over at each and nod, agreeing to both attack LeShawana. But LeShawana predicted this, and sneaks up to knock Sierra off.
"Sierra!" Julie screams.
"Sorry girl," LeShawana calls down.
Julie comes attacking, but LeShawana dodges and loses her balance. Julie takes this opportunity to launch a roundhouse kick at LeShawana, which successfully knocks her off.
"And with that, Julie moves into the finals," Rhonda announces. "And now for Bradley, SG, and Rosamond to face off!"
The three (and Rosamond's cats), get on the platform. "Go!" Chris yells.
Rosamond's cats, Wednesday and BeetleJuice, try and pounce at SG and Bradley. SG captures Wednesday and throws her off while Bradley uses his pugil stick to knock BeetleJuice down to the river.
"Go SG!" Julie cheers.
"You can do it SG!" Sierra calls.
"Go get them man," Mikey yells.
SG turns around and blushes, but is then knocked off his pedestal by Bradley, who uses his pugil stick.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" screams Julie.
"Here kitty, kitty," Bradley teases.
Rosamond replies by having both Coraline and Vincent attack. But their combined effort wasn't enough, as both cats were flung away by his pugil stick.
Rosamond gasps, knowing she is defenseless. Bradley runs towards her but she swiftly dodges him. She then proceeds to kick him, and he knocks her to the edge of the pedestal with his pugil stick. Rosamond hisses.
"Sorry Rosamond," he states, as he knocks her off with his pugil stick.
"And with that we have our final three!" Rhonda yells. "Now let's finish this. You all have won a special reward, but whoever does best here will get an even better prize! Now, Jovi, Julie, and Bradley! Get ready!"
The three get on the platform. Bradley is intensely focused. Jovi is nervous but doesn't let her face show it. And Julie is well…you know.
"…go!" Chris shouts.
Julie sends a roundhouse kick at Bradley. He uses his pugil stick to knock her to the ground. Then he lunges at Jovi. Jovi barely dodges, but falls to the ground. Angry, Jovi kicks the pugil stick out of his hand and into the river.
"Ha!" she gloats.
Bradley picks her up to his shoulder and prepares to throw her, but then Julie sneaks up and kicks him in the butt. He falls as does Jovi, but she gets up.
"Winning!" Julie screams, and spits in his eye.
Bradley then kicks her leg and trips Julie, who loses her balance. Bradley gets up and just as Julie is about to gain her balance, he pushes her off.
"Only two left!" Chris yells.
"Sorry Jovi, but you're going down," Bradley states. "We both know you can't beat me."
He then charges at her.
"Kick him in the nuts!" Julie screams from the water.
As Bradley is about to knock her off, Jovi kicks him real hard in the nuts. Bradley falls on his knees in pain.
"Bye," Jovi calls, and kicks him off.
"And with that, Jovi wins!" Chris calls. Rosamond cheers as Jovi jumps up and down.
Later Chris, Rhonda and the contestants are shown into the elimination room. Rhonda is holding a tray of 24 barf bags. Chris is holding a parachute and standing next to Jovi, Bradley and Julie in that order.
The others are standing next to the wooden bleachers in there, which have been split into three sections, each facing a contestant. An orange bench faces Jovi, a red bench faces Bradley and a purple bench faces Julie.
"Now you three were the final 3 of the challenge," Chris begins. "So, you get to pick your own team and name it!"
The three cheer while the others murmur and whisper amongst themselves.
"Since Jovi won, she gets to choose first, then Bradley, then Julie. You start by picking a contestant of your same gender, and then one of the opposite, and then back again and continue until one person has not been picked. This person will be eliminated and take the drop of shame! Everyone you call will get a barf bag of airline issue peanuts from Rhonda."
"Speaking of which," Rhonda states, "here are your barf bags."
She proceeds to toss them their barf bags.
Julie eats one and responds, "Tangy."
"When your name is called, please sit in the section across from the person who chose you," Chris says. "Jovi please begin."
"Rosamond," Jovi says.
"Chef Hatchet," Bradley says.
"Sierra," Julie says.
"Geoff," Jovi says.
"Lindsay," Bradley says.
"SG," Julie says.
"Bridgette," Jovi says.
"DJ," Bradley says.
"Nellie," Julie says.
"Justin," Jovi says.
"Heather," Bradley says.
"Mikey," Julie says.
"Courtney," Jovi says.
"Duncan," Bradley says.
"LeShawana," Julie says.
"Trent," Jovi says.
"Barbie," Bradley reluctantly says. Some of his teammates mumble something. Barbie says nothing and sits down.
"Noah," Julie says.
"...Taylor," Jovi says.
"...Cosmic River," Bradley says.
"...Gwen," Julie says.
"Well, with that," Chris says, "the eliminated contestant is…
...Collin."
"Yes!" Rhonda cheers.
"Wait, I was listening and stuff, but what happens if you're not picked?" Collin asked.
"It means this," Rhonda replies. She hands him the parachute and opens the door. "Bye, Collin," she says, waving before angrily kicking out.
"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" he screams.
Jovi is shown in the confessional. "I'm pleased with my team for the most part. Truthfully, I didn't want Taylor, but if I had chosen Gwen, she and Courtney would have gotten into a fight, and everybody would've had to select sides. It would be an immense amount of drama, and I think Courtney was a better choice. ...I hope I made the right decision."
Bradley is shown in the confessional. "Barbie wasn't my number one pick obviously. But I didn't want to deal with Taylor. And I don't want Gwen. I chose Duncan because he always gets far. He'll do great in the challenges, so my team will get far, but when it comes time I can easily dispose of him so he doesn't become a threat in the future. If he had Gwen, though, they would gather plenty of allies, to thrawt my attempts; I couldn't have that. If Barbie causes too much trouble then I can dispose of her quite easily."
Julie is shown in the confessional. "I just saved a lot of money by switching to Gecko!"
"Well, that's our show," Rhonda says, smiling back in the elimination room.
"Join us next time for Total Drama What The Heck?" Chris yells.
Chapter 3 Drama Is Served
Chris and Rhonda are shown in the cockpit.
"Last time on Total Drama What The Heck?" Chris begins. "Our contestants' singing was judged by former judges of American Idol; Rosamond was the best and Collin was the worst. Then we landed in the Amazon. And that's where things got interesting."
"The contestants had to race through the jungle to the Amazon River," Rhonda states. "Since Rosamond was the best at singing she got a head start. She chose her new friend Jovi to join her and they raced off. Not that it mattered much, since Bradley and his alliance got there first."
"Anyway," Chris goes on. "Julie, Bradley and Jovi were the last 3 on the platform, and Jovi ended up winning. The three then picked teams and Collin wasn't chosen, so he was eliminated."
Rhonda sighs happily. "How will the teams work out now? Who will the first challenge Who will be eliminated?"
"Find out on Total Drama What The Heck?" Chris states.
(The theme song plays)
The contestants are shown in the elimination room as Chris and Rhonda walk in. "All right contestants," Chris begins. "The next order of business is to name teams. Oh, and since Jovi came in first, her team gets first class as their reward."
"Now Jovi," Rhonda says, "what would you like to name your team?"
"Hmm," Jovi thinks for a second. "I like Team Adamantine. It's a very poetic, archaic word, meaning indestructible. "
Rhonda tilts her head. "Uh...Team Adamantine it is!"
Jovi's team emblem, an orange crystaline shield with several cracks in it, appears above her team.
"So basically you're Team Victory," Chris says. "Now what's your team's name, Bradley?"
"I'm naming my team off my school's great athletic teams," Bradley stated. "We're the Bulldogs!"
His emblem, a red crossed-eyed face of a bulldog foaming at the mouth, appears above Bradley's team.
Rosamond and her cats silently hiss at the team name.
"Ok," Rhonda replies. "Anyway Julie, what's your team's name?"
"I DON'T KNOW!" Julie cries, falling to the floor in tears.
"Oh, come on, Julie, you'll have a great idea!" Sierra says encouragingly. "It can't be any worse than Jovi's!"
"I liked it," Jovi pouts.
"It's pretty awful," Courtney states.
Nellie sighs. "What's it matter our name? We're probably going to lose first anyway."
"Well, I do have one idea but it's not very good..." Julie says.
"I'm sure it's great, Julie," SG says, helping her up off the floor.
"Promise you'll think it's great?" Julie asks, drying her eyes.
"Promise," SG replies.
"Ok," Julie says, taking a deep breath. "Our team is…The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"What The Heck?" Noah screams.
"Do you like it?" Julie asks.
"I like it!" Rhonda replies. "It's very groovy!"
"Wow," Heather says. "Were you born in the seventies?"
"Like, what's wrong with the seventies, man?" Cosmic River asks. "Besides the Watergate scandal... and the Vietnam War ...and the 1973 oil scandal...and"
"That's So 70 Show!" Julie interupts.
"Somehow I knew you were going to do that," Nellie states.
Julie's emblem, a purple, poorly scribbled question mark, appears above her team.
"Great! Now that we're finished with team naming, let's go enjoy dinner!" Chris says.
The scene changes to the cafeteria.
"What is for dinner, Rhonda?" Chris asks.
"It can't be worse than Chef's cooking," Heather replies.
"I'm right here!" Chef states.
"So?" Heather replies. "I talk bad about everybody no matter where they are. Like this: Rhonda, you're an idiot."
Rhonda, ignoring their comments, proceeds to describe dinner. "For dinner we have pasta, along with a few sides. You can a few different options of sauces, and you can have meatballs, parmensian or a salad if you prefer. Drinks are in the cooler, and a little later I'll pass out chocolate cake for dessert!"
"And you made this by yourself?" Bridgette asks.
"Yup, it was pretty easy, actually," Rhonda replies. "Cooking isn't hard, as you'll learn..."
"Well, lets dig in!" Chris interupts.
A redheaded intern and Rhonda proceed to pass out the food and plates. The contestants proceed to eat family style, passing the bowls to one another.
At the Fun Bunch's table, Julie, Sierra, Mikey and Nellie are shown talking.
"This Alfredo sauce rocks!" Mikey yells.
"I know right? I can't wait for the cake," Sierra replies.
"If we still have room for cake!" Julie says licking sauce off Sierra's face. "Nellie, pass me some more of those noodles, please!"
Nellie passes her the noodles, but says, "Be careful not to each too much or you could get a stroke. These foods are probably covered in high portions of fat that will kill you."
"You can't tell me you don't like the food?" Mikey asks. "It tastes so great!"
"I can't taste the good in things because there is no good," Nellie replies unemotionally. "I can only taste the unpleasant and unhealthy along with any pain it causes. That's why I'm not eating much. That and the fact we're stuffing our faces while children starve and die slowly."
"Honey, you need a psychiatrist," Julie replies.
"Thats what Cody told me!" Sierra replies. "I miss Cody."
"What happened to the two of you after Total Drama World Tour?" Mikey asks.
"We became friends. Great friends. But Cody still wasn't interested in me," Sierra replies. "I tried hard for him to like me. I even made him a huge meal. My mother always said the way to a man's heart is through his stomach."
"Funny, I always though the way to a man's heart was through surgery," Julie replies. "But I don't get why Cody wasn't interested."
"It's because he wants girls hotter than me," Sierra replies, sighing.
"The belief that people "fall" in love is false," Nellie states. "People only look for "lovers" because our primal instincts are designed to make our bodies feel attraction so we can repopulate, like our ancestors once needed to when they were hunted by preadtors. That's why some animals don't really raise their children, while others ensure they'll live to keep their speices going.
Species are attracted to good looking mates because they are usually healthy and strong, which means their children will be. We made up this "love" stuff. We only want a mate we can get along with because we have decided to mate for life, and we want a mate that doesn't annoy us."
"One, you take up too much of the show's time with your jabbering," Julie replies. "Two, you don't seem to be looking for love. So doesn't this mean you're not acting on your primal instincts?"
"I have an explanation for myself," Nellie explains, uncaring. "Our bodies create attraction through chemicals inside us. It's possible that I lack or don't produce those chemicals, or that my brain doesn't respond to those chemicals. There is a thing called nonsexuality, where people don't feel attraction or "love" if it was real. Anyway, the reason Cody isn't attracted to Sierra is because subconicously he doesn't find her good for mating. Or maybe his mind is adjusted to not wanting to mate for life, like lions don't, instead wanting to be head of the pride who gets to mate with the best lionesses in his pride."
"I have heard of nonsexuality," Julie replies. "But I don't think that is what you are. I think you're just ignoring your feelings. I mean, you're obviously attracted to me."
Nellie rolls her eyes. "Yes, you're animal magnatism is just so overwhelming."
"I'm so confused as to what we're talking about," Mikey says.
"Me, too," Sierra says.
Julie glances over at SG. "SG looks sad."
"You keep glancing at him," Mikey teases. "Maybe we should go sit with him, so he'll be happier!"
"How will that make him happier?" Nellie asks.
"Come on, lets go," Julie says.
The four race to SG.
"Hi SG!" Julie says.
"Hey," SG says, surprised.
"Can we sit with you?" Julie asks.
"Um sure, go ahead," SG replies.
"Why are you sitting all alone?" Julie asks.
"I didn't think anyone wanted to sit with me. I'm kinda quiet," SG replies.
"Yeah, but you're really nice," Julie replies. "Tons of people would want to sit with you. Especially us."
"Thanks," SG says, blushing.
"You're welcome," Julie says. "Hey, don't you think this food is great?"
"Yeah," SG replies. "I love these breadsticks. I can't wait for the cake."
"I know, right?" Sierra replies. "I really love cake."
"I once had this great wedding cake," Julie says. "Too bad I didn't get more before the groom caught me eating it early.
SG laughs. "Were you even invited to the wedding?"
"It was obviously a green card marriage!" Julie defends. "So who cares right? I stole their wedding gifts too; got an Xbox 360 and a chinchilla," Julie replies.
"Who gives someone a chinchilla?" SG asks.
"I think it was for cooking," Julie replies. "I've heard they're oily, like duck. I've always wanted to try giant lamprey myself."
Meanwhile, LeShawna, Gwen and Noah are sitting with each other.
"Okay, this team kind of sucks," Gwen says. "We hardly know anybody here, not to mention I'm not with my boyfriend."
"Then don't mention it," Noah replies. "We know you miss sucking face Gwen; it's rather obvious."
"Listen y'all," LeShawna says. "The newbies on this team are already friends and probably will work in an alliance. The only way we make it any farther is if we form an alliance."
"I'm in," Gwen states.
"I guess it's the lesser of two idiots," Noah states. "I'll join."
"Great!" LeShawna says. "Now we have to work our hardest in challenges."
LeShawna gives Noah a glare. "Or else we'll be on the cutting board. Meanwhile, we'll work on persuading the two of them to turn on the others."
Meanwhile, at Team Adamantine's table, everyone is having a good time. Everyone except Taylor, who is crying in the corner alone. Bridgette is talking to Courtney (who is actually smiling). Geoff, Trent and Justin are chatting. Jovi and Rosamond are chatting about their life back at home.
"So Rosmaond, do you have a boyfriend?" Jovi asks.
Rosamond blushes. "No, I've never had a boyfriend. What about you?"
"Not currently, but I've had a few previously," Jovi says. "Do you see any here you think are kind of cute?"
"Well, Justin is hot, while DJ loves animals and is strong. SG is really cute. Bradley looks hot, but none of them seem my type," Rosamond says.
"Who is your type?" Jovi asks.
"Um…" Rosamond says, blushing.
"OH," Jovi says. "I get it."
"Get what?" Rosamond asks.
"Nothing," Jovi says, smirking.
At the Bulldogs' table, Barbie is at the far end of the table, eating alone. Cosmic River passes her food than goes back to his seat next to DJ and Duncan.
"Dude, why are you passing her food?" Duncan asks.
"Really, bro?" Cosmic River asks.
"She is kinda scary," DJ says.
"No reason to freak about Barbie," Cosmic River says. "She is just a violet that has to bloom. Like thing what your mom would say about judging a lady before you could know her, man."
"I guess you're right," DJ says. "Man, I wish Momma was here. This food reminds me of her."
"Grow up," Duncan says.
"Don't be glum, just mellow out. Your Momma is proud of you for making it to the fourth season of Total Drama," Cosmic River says, bear hugging DJ.
"Thanks man," DJ says.
"You're welcome dude," Cosmic River replies, digging into his salad.
At the same time, Heather, Chef, Lindsay and Bradley were eating together.
"Look at that swine eat," Heather states, staring at Barbie who is really just normally eating a salad.
"I don't think I could have fed that blob," Chef states.
"Why did you put her on the team, Bradley?" Lindsay asks.
"It was her or Gwen, " Bradley states.
"I suppose you made the better choice," Heather states. "And without Gwen here, Duncan has less allies making him an easy target."
"Exactly," Bradley replies. We just need one more person and we'll be the majority."
"Who, the hippie?" Chef asks.
Bradley laughs. "We want strong teammates Chef. We'll get DJ."
"How?" Heather asked.
"Don't worry, I have a plan," Bradley snickered.
Later, the teams were done eating the main meal as the interns passed out the delicious chocolate cake.
"After you're done with the cake," Chris says, "You may return to your living areas. For those of you in first class get to enjoy the internet with our new laptops! For those of you who aren't, beware of rats, raccoons, bees, and one or two homeless people. Are plane seems to have a pest problem."
SG is sadly picking at his chocolate cake.
What's wrong with your cake, SG?" Julie asks. "Does it smell like pie? 'Cause I once ate a cake that was chocolate, but it was actually pie. A cow pie. A cow patty, if you will. A large pile of cow…."
"I get it," SG replies. "I was bummed because I was told we would get internet access, but I wasn't told it would be only available in first class."
"You can use my laptop!" Julie calls. "But on one condition."
"What?" SG asks.
"I can call you Puddin!" Julie replies.
"Why?" SG asks.
"Because I wanna," Julie states winking.
"Well, I guess…" SG begins.
"Yay!" Julie replies.
The scene changes to the next morning. Duncan, Gwen, Julie, Sierra, Nellie, Rosamond, Jovi, Cosmic River, DJ and Barbie are the only ones in the cafeteria eating breakfast, while the others sleep.
"Why are we here again?" Rosamond asks. "I was having such a good cat nap."
"Nap?" Jovi asks.
"Like my cats, I'm a creature of the night. I take naps to make sure I still have energy to feast on the entrails of my prey," Rosamond responds, clawing her hand.
Jovi giggles. "Mmmhmm. Well you know the saying, early to bed and early to rise makes a man wise-"
"-But socially dead," Rosamond interupts, opening tuna cans.
"Have those been in your pockets this whole time?" Jovi asks.
"No," Rosamond replies. "I bring them in my bags. Along with these!"
Rosamond pulls out a small, fat, warty, big nosed doll with grey skin. It's hair is various colors and sticks up to a point. "Ain't he a cutie?" "They have a charm to them," Jovi lies.
"I was hoping you'd say that!" Rosamond cheers. "I bought a kit to make them from my home town, and I made you one!
Rosamond hands a Jovi a troll doll. It looks as ugly as the first but with Jovi's clothes and hair color.
"It's very...personable," Jovi replies. "The resemblance is uncanny."
"I knew you'd love it!" Rosamond replies, putting some hashbrowns on her plate. "They're said to protect and aid you in times of need, when you least suspect it."
Rosamond drops a worn out picture, showing a younger version of her and a little boy in a trench coat. A man that looks like Rosamond's father has his arms around the two kids.
"Now, who is this?" Jovi asks, looking at the photo.
"Oh no one," Rosamond replies, snatching the photo.
"Who was the little boy?" Jovi questions.
"Oh him, he's my childhood friend, Nate" Rosamond replies. "He's a decetive. He's found all sorts of missing objects; he's a genius like that. And a real sweetheart."
"You seem to really admire him," Jovi replies.
"Well, he is a great guy," Rosamond replies, blushing.
Jovi laughs and puts a pancake on her plate. "I can tell."
Meanwhile, Julie, Sierra and Nellie are talking and eating.
"Rhonda told me we have a challenge today," Sierra replied unenthusiastically. "She couldn't tell me much more."
"Well, she certainly makes good pancakes!" Julie says scarfing down pancakes. "Rhonda should open up an IHOP! Not that I'm allowed in IHOP anymore. Or WaffleHouse. Or my house. Or your house."
"K," Sierra states, eating one of her eggs. "Julie, could I borrow your computer? I want to update my blog about what I've been doing here."
"Sorry, I don't have it," Julie states. "I let SG borrow it, and he used all night long. Look, here he comes now."
SG walks into the cafeteria and sits next to Julie.
"Thank you so much for letting me use your computer, Julie," SG says, handing her back her purple laptop.
"No problem, Puddin," Julie says, taking back her computer and handing it to Sierra. "You didn't look at my Word documents, did you?"
"No," SG replies.
"What's on them?" Nellie asks, even though she doesn't really care.
"Oh nothing," Julie replies. "Just my alien master's plans for world domination. And my GROCERY SHOPPING LIST!"
"What do you need at the grocery?" Sierra asks.
"Some bacon, is all," Julie says.
Later, the contestants have all finished breakfast and are facing Chris and Rhonda.
"Good morning, everyone!" Rhonda says. "It's great to see all of you!"
"Wow! You're so much happier than yesterday, Rhonda," Chris says. "Was yesterday the end of your time of the month?"
"OH, MY GOD, SHUT UP, CHRIS!" Rhonda yells hitting him on the head with her frying pan.
"I guess it isn't over," Chris says, rubbing his head.
"CHRIS!" Rhonda screams, hitting him again.
"Okay, okay, sheesh," Chris says, rubbing his head. "Anyway, did you guys sleep well?"
"I thought they seemed pretty sleepy when I went collected samples of their...nevermind," Rhonda says.
Everyone backs away a little. "Anyway, since we're using footage from last night, we decided to do a challenge today."
The older contestants groan.
"So, for today's challenge…" Chris began, "we're going to...Paris, France!"
"You mean where they make French fries?" Julie asks.
"My boyfriend once bought me French fries," Taylor says before crying.
"Now, unlike last time Total Drama went to France, we will not be doing art based challenges," Rhonda says. "Instead we'll be doing a cooking challenge! Cause they're totally different!"
"A cooking challenge?" Noah asks. "Way to break new ground."
A light above them goes off and a ping noise is made.
"Looks like we're here!" Rhonda says, stepping out of the plane into an airport. Chris and the other contestants step out as well.
The scene changes to a big and fancy restaurant. The contestants, along with Rhonda and Chris, get out and enter the restaurant.
"Welcome to some fancy famous French restaurant!" Rhonda says. "Does Paris even have unfancy resturants? Anyway, for today's challenge, your teams will cook us a meal from a cooking book brought us to by our sponsers. I will judge the challenge along with two secert judges!"
Rhonda throws the three team captains cookbooks.
"The winners get first class and a special reward," Chris says. "Rhonda, what is our special reward?"
"The winners will get to have a movie pajama party!" Rhonda exclaims excitedly. "They will get to stay up and watch movies from a huge bunch of choices. I'll also cater the event with popcorn made straight from a machine, and make many different desserts of their choice!"
"The losing team, however, will go to elimination and vote off one of their own," Chris says. "Now, before we begin, Rhonda has a few rules to go over."
Rhonda nods. "The first and most important is to make sure not to add any kind of potatoes or pumpkin in the recepie, even stuff flavored like them."
"Why?" DJ asks.
"You don't want to know," Rhonda says, cringing. "Other than that, I don't think there is anything else to say. You need to make an entree, a side and a great dessert. Remember to try and follow the recipe as best you can. You can deviate from it, but the recpies are kind of complicated so don't stray to far off.
Also, I want to see teamwork! You should be able to make everything taste great without an ounce of help if you're working as a team and treating everyone nicely."
Heather rolls her. "This isn't kindergarten; you either man up or give up.
"Just start the challenge," Rhonda replies. "Your kitchen has your team emblem on it. You'll find the books in there."
Someone's In The Kitchen With Jenny, Someone's In The Kitchen I Know!
Later, The Bulldogs are shown in the kitchen.
"What are we going to do, Bradley?" Lindsay asked.
"Well, since this challenge involves cooking, I've decided that Chef and DJ will lead the challenge," Bradley states. "They are the most qualified, and I trust them."
"Really?" DJ asked. "I kind of messed up last season..."
"That's in the past," Bradley reassures. "I for one don't care about that. Besides, this in your element man!"
"I say we make breakfast," Chef states. "Since Rhonda's meal was so terrible this morning."
"I liked it," Lindsay replies.
Chef glares. "I'm feeling a ham and cheese omelet."
"Yeah, breakfast is easy and tasty no matter what time of the day. We can serve some sausage links on the side, and for the best part, a raspberry crepe," DJ replies.
"All right," Chef says. "Me and DJ will cook the crepe. Lindsay and Bradley can cook the omelet, while Heather and the punk cook the sausages." Chef tears two pages from the book and hands them to Heather and Bradley.
"The hippie and fatty can make the whipped cream for the raspberry filled crepes," Chef commands, tearing out another page and handing it to Cosmic River.
"Unless Barbie plans on licking the bowl. Then there won't be any left," Bradley teases.
Barbie doesn't speak.
"Brah, don't go treating poor Barbie bad," Cosmic River says. "Give peace a chance. No reason to be square, man."
"Oh, go protest war or save the rainforest sasquatch," Heather says. "But after you and the hungry hippo go and make the whipped cream."
Cosmic River starts to say something, but Heather walks away. The others go their stations and begin reading the recipe.
Bradley walks up to Chef and whispers, "Try and apologize to DJ about the alliance in TDA so we can get him to join us."
Chef nods and smiles. Bradley smirks and starts to walk over to Lindsay, but Duncan stops him.
"Can we chat outside?" Duncan asks.
Bradley nods calmly. "What can I help you with?"
"What gives?" Duncan asks. "Why did you pick me to be on your team but not Gwen, even though she is my girlfriend?"
"Well, I obviously picked you because you're so good," Bradley lies.
Duncan glares. "I didn't ask for butt kissing!"
"But it's the truth," Bradley states. "You're always good in challenges and always made it far in past seasons, even winning season two, which was clearly the hardest season. I knew I needed someone like you on my team."
"Then why did you not pick Gwen?" Duncan asks.
"Because Heather was on this team," Bradley explains. "Having to be with her on every team must suck and I felt she deserved a break. Besides, we both know she can handle herself on her own."
"I know," Duncan starts, "but I…"
"You want to be with her and protect her," Bradley butts in. "I completely understand, and I'm sorry I had to split you two up. But I need you on my team."
"Wait, why did you pick Heather if you know she would be bad?" Duncan asks.
"I have a plan," Bradley whispers. "Heather's good at the game, so we keep her around until we lose; then we vote her off when she least suspects it. Lindsay and DJ will easily side with us."
"Well it's not a bad idea," Duncan replies.
"Excellent," Bradley says. "So I guess this means we're...in an alliance?"
"No duh," Duncan jokes. "You're not a bad guy, and Gwen says I should always try and befriend new people. I'll put in a good word about you with DJ to make sure he trusts you."
"Thanks man," Bradley says. "We'll be voting Heather off in no time."
Duncan nods and walks back into the kitchen. Bradley smiles evilly and rubs his hands together.
Bradley is shown in the confessional. "This is too easy; I have basically everyone on my side. Not to mention I have a secret plan for getting DJ and Cosmic River to trust me. Well there is Barbie...but if there is one thing I'm certain of, it's that Barbie will never be a threat to my plans.
I suppose I could align with Duncan, but I'd have a better chance in getting support in the finals if I go against Heather and Chef; I mean every previous challenge depends on your support. And, while Duncan maybe a strong player he's the most obnoxious contestant on here. I'm going to enjoy eliminating him."
Meanwhile, in Team Adamantine's kitchen, the constants are trying to decide what to do.
"I think we should do Italian like in the last cooking challenge on TDI," Geoff says. "We could make spaghetti again."
"Thats a good idea but I think we need to do something more original, especially since we had pasta last night," Courtney says. "No offense."
"It's cool, Courts," Geoff replies.
"Now I think…"
"Pizza!" Jovi interrupts. "We should do pizza. This book contains a pizza recipe, along with one for greek salad and zepola."
"What?" Courtney asks.
"An Italian dessert," Jovi replies. "They're like fried dough balls or cream-puffs. My grandma makes them; she filled them with custard and put vanilla icing on top, with a dad of chocolate. This book has a fine recipe for them. They'll be the premier part of the meal."
"Well, that isn't what I was going to suggest but I guess it works," Courtney says. "Now then Rosamond and Tay.."
"Actually since I'm the captain I'll give commands," Jovi states. "Bridgette and Geoff, pizza sauce. Justin and Trent, pizza dough. Taylor you have custard, Courtney you have salad. Rosamond I will make dough and icing for the zeppoles. Now, let's get cracking!"
Everyone shuffles off into the kitchen and gets working. Courtney mumbles something under her breath.
Courtney is shown in the confessional. "Who does she think she is? I was a CIT! She is just some newbie who waltz in here and thinks she is qualified to lead. I mean, she barely won that challenge on her own! I get it...she thinks she can take my place! Well, mark my words, I'll eliminate her and her little cat friend too!"
Meanwhile at in Julie's kitchen, the contestants aren't sure what to do.
"Well, what are we doing oh great and powerful one?" Noah asks.
"Give me a sec," Julie says flipping through the book.
"If only we had a rat to cook for us like that movie," Sierra says staring at the wall.
"But Heather isn't on our team," SG whispers.
Sierra snorts. "Good one SG!"
SG blushes a bit, and distances himself from the others.
"I KNOW!" Julie exclaims. "We'll cook a country homestyle meal! This book has a great recipe for country fried steak. We'll cook homestyle macaroni and cheese and serve cherry pie on the side! It will be like eating at Cracker Barrel!"
"I like it!" Sierra says.
"Me two!" Mikey replies.
"Me three," Leshawna says.
"What about you Nellie?" Julie asks.
"I don't like anything," Nellie replies uncaringly.
"Forget her baby cakes," Leshawna states. "Let's get cooking!"
Julie squeals. "Leshawna and Gwen can make the pie, Nellie and Noah can make the gravy while Sierra and Mikey make the mac and cheese. Which means SG and me can make the country fried steak! Everyone clear?"
Everyone nods and moves to their station.
"Now is our chance," Leshawna whispers to Gwen who nods and moves her way towards SG.
"Hey SG can we talk outside?" Gwen asks.
"Sure." SG replies. He follows Gwen out the kitchen where they stop in the hall.
"So you know me SG," Gwen says.
"Yeah." SG replies. "I'm...I'm actually a big fan of yours....you're my favorite."
Gwen touches her heart. "Thanks, that's so sweet...maybe this will make things easier…"
"Huh?" SG asks.
"Well, I notice your close with Julie but...I think she is pretending to be your friend so she can manipulate you and your friends," Gwen says.
"What?" SG asks. "Why would you think that?"
"Well, I accidentally heard her in the confessional," Gwen replies. "She was talking about perfecting her act. I mean, she acts like a nut and tells unbelievable stories. She never even says where she is from. Would you trust her? Would you believe any real person acts like that?"
"I…I don't know what to say," SG replies. "I'm not sure I can believe you, no offense. It's just, Julie has been really nice to me."
"I understand," Gwen replies. "I don't want to believe it either, but I don't want you to get hurt. You're new at this game, and that's what it does best. Just, try not to get used SG."
Gwen leaves SG to ponder what just happened.
The door opens again and Julie walks out. "Hey SG!" she calls. "You okay?"
"Fine," SG whispers.
"You sure?" Julie asks.
"Yeah," he replies. "Lets go back to the kitchen."
Later, Team Adamantine has made great progress. Trent and Justin are sprinkling on cheese. They just finish sprinkling the cheese as Jovi walks over and inspects it.
"I think this pizza needs more," Trent says reaching for the parmesan.
"No more cheese!" Jovi yells. "The recipe calls for this many cups of cheese. No more, no less."
"But it doesn't look like enough," Trent says.
"It will expand in the stove Trent," Jovi replies. "If that's what the recipe calls for than we don't need to change anything else. For a challenge like this, it's best to play it safe with these elementary matters. Not to mention, Rhonda suggested we follow the recipe, so naturally if we don't it'll blow up in our faces."
"Fine," Justin says throwing his hands in the air.
"Glad you see it my way," Jovi replies. She walks off, checking on Courtney.
"Stop Courtney!" Jovi yells.
"What now?" Courtney asks.
"Your about to cut an extra head of lettuce. The recipe calls for only two," Jovi replies.
"Sorry I was distracted." Courtney replies.
"Distracted mocking me!" Jovi exclaims.
"What!?!" Courtney says angrily slicing another food.
"Rosamond has seen you mocking all the orders I've given," Jovi says. "You could cost us the challenge with all your childish behavior and…..COURTNEY!"
"What?" Courtney yells about to push in the chopped up bits of food she cut.
"You're about to add potatoes!" Jovi yells.
Courtney looks down; without noticing Courtney had chopped up a potato and almost added it. Courtney begins to frantically search the salad, making sure she didn't mess up anything else.
"Anything else wrong with it?" Jovi asks.
"No," Courtney replies.
"Let's chat Courtney, o'utside'." Jovi says.
"Whatever," Courtney replies following her to the hall outside.
"Courtney, you almost cost us the challenge!" Jovi states.
"I know that!" Courtney replies yelling.
"You know I could have let you add that," Jovi says. "Then you would have bungled the challenge and you'd have been done away with. Do you know why I didn't?"
"Because it would ruin your perfect team," Courtney snidely replies.
"No," Jovi says. "It's because you're my teammate and I care about what happens to my team."
"Yeah right," Courtney responds.
"It's true," Jovi says. "Courtney I know your a great leader and you would do just as well leading this team. But that's my position and I need you to respect that, because I do respect you. "
"Really?" Courtney questions.
"Of course!" Jovi replies. "I'm actually a big fan of your's!"
"I didn't think I had any fans," Courtney says.
"Why would you think that?" Jovi asks.
Courtney turns her head away. "Because I'm always reading these stories on the internet about these horrible things that happen to me for no reason.
"I' have seen what you're referring to," Jovi replies. "But that doesn't mean everyone has ill will towards you. Not everyone is liked by everyone else."
"Thanks," Courtney replies drying her eye. "And, admittedly you are a great leader. I should have given you a chance."
"It's fine," Jovi says. The two hug, a little awkwardly.
Rosamond comes outside. "Everything okay out here?"
"Yeah." Jovi replies. "We're just becoming better friends."
"Excuse me," A voice behind them says.
The three turn around and see a redheaded girl wearing a mint green tee that says "Adorable". She has green eyes and orange hair in a pony tail tied with a purple hairband. She is wearing a jean skirt with a white belt. On her feet are white tennis shoes with purple buckles.
Jenny (designed by Frank)
"Greetings," Jovi says.
"Hey!" the girl says. "My name is Jenny!"
"I'm Rosamond!" Rosamond replies, holding out her hand.
Jenny grabs it and shakes it. "Nice to meet you Rosamond. Maybe you and your friends can help me."
"How can we aid you miss?" Jovi asks.
"Well, me and my loser sidekick got lost in the kitchen and can't find our way out," Jenny says. "Do you know the way?"
"Just head out that the door to the right,"" Rosamond tells her.
"Wait, did you say sidekick?" Courtney asks.
"Yu, ." Jenny replies. She moves to the left to reveal a boy behind her. He has dirty blonde hair and dark circles under his eyes. He wears a black hoodie and jeans along with black converses, having striking purple laces. He also is wearing a digital wrist watch that is also purple.
"Hey."
"Thats my sidekick Toby," Jenny sighs. "Unfortunately he is a failure at life so he isn't the best sidekick."
"Shut up Jenny!" Toby yells at her.
"YOUR MOM!" Jenny screams.
"Alright." Jovi says. "So is there anything else we can…"
"Hey wanna hear a secret?" Jenny asks.
"Sure." Jovi says not sure if she wants to hear it.
"My name... is Jenny." Jenny whispers.
"That wasn't a secret moron," Toby states.
"SHUT UP TOBY!" Jenny yells.
"MAKE ME!" Toby replies.
"Um…" Courtney tries to say.
"Hey what are you guys doing in there?" Jenny asks, letting herself into the kitchen.
"We're competing in a reality show challenge," Rosamond replies.
"Cool!" Jenny exclaims. "Can we help you? Pretty please with sugar and lemonade on top!"
"My apologies," Jovi says. "But we don't need the assistance. We've got everything under control."
Jovi sees Justin and Trent sitting around. "What are you guys doing?"
"Chill," Justin says. "We're just taking a break."
"Hilarious, tell me another joke." Jovi replies. "Do you see the rest of us lazing about? That pizza maybe close to done but it's not done. We still need to add sauce and bake it. This team is depending on you to do your part; that's the unstated rule of being a team."
"Are you sure you don't need our help?" Toby asks.
"Positive," Jovi replies. "If all of us are working, there shouldn't be anything needed to do. It seems I'll just have to crack down harder."
"Harder?" Justin whispers.
"Well, I guess well go then." Jenny says. "Bye!"
"A pleasure meeting you folks," Rosamond replies.
Jenny skips down the hall as Toby reluctantly follows.
"We got lost in kitchen." Jenny sings. "We got lost in kitchen, We got lost in a kitchen! It's not halloween and I'm really hungry."
Jovi, Rosamond and Courtney walk back into the kitchen.
"Psst.. Jovi," Rosamond whispers. "Jovi...Jovi!"
"Rosamond...I am right next to you, " Jovi states. "What's up?"
"Look what I brought!" Rosamond whispers excitedly. She pulls out the troll dolls out her pocket, each one looking like a teammate and each super nasty.
"Oh, how...wonderful," Jovi replies. "But I think you're missing one."
"What?" Rosamond says. "Oh no, where could it have gone?"
"Maybe you left it outside." Jovi suggests. "Hurry and go check."
Rosamond nods and hurries out the door. Jovi sighs in relief and says. "Everyone, may I have your attention. I need a bit of a large favor..."
Meanwhile in Julie's kitchen, LeShawna and Gwen are about to bake the cherry pie.
"Gurl, this pie will not wow those judges," LeShawna says.
"I agree with you," Gwen says. "It doesn't sound very tasty at all."
"How about we add a little something to give some wow," Leshawna suggests.
"I don't know," Gwen says. "Were suppose to follow the recipe, it is a bit complicated"
"Trust me, Leshawna knows what she's doing," Leshawna replies.
Leshawna takes out a container filled with sugar and scoops a bit into the mix. "Now lets add some extra cherries to make sure it is sweet."
Leshawna scoops a few more cherries in the bowl.
"And finally some of…this," Leshawna pulls out a jar of some tan spice.
"What is that?" Gwen asks.
"According to the label it's called Épices citrouille Cannelle," Leshawna replies as she pours it in. "But it's really just cinnamon. Now lets put it in the pie tin and bake it."
While they're doing that, Nellie and Noah have finished the gravy.
"So Nellie?" Noah asks whispering. "You don't like Julie, do you?"
"I don't like anything," Nellie says uncaringly.
"Well, do you not like Julie enough to vote her off whenever we lose?" Noah asks.
"Are you trying to get me to vote with you or join your alliance?" Nellie asks.
"If you're willing to," Noah says.
"I'll consider it," Nellie replies. "But I won't tell you my answer any time soon."
"Gee thanks," Noah replies. "Anyone ever tell you how considerate you are?"
Around the saw time, Julie and SG have finished making a mix for the breading.
"Hey Julie?" SG asks.
"Yes,?" she replies.
"I was wondering where your from," SG states. "You've never really told us about you life."
"Oh so you wanna know stuff about me huh Puddin?" Julie asks. "Well, my favorite chocolate is milk chocolate and my favorite flower is a clematis, aka a ramona. I'd like to be taken to a theme park or maybe a romantic picnic under the stars near a waterfall, with a full moon out at midnight or…"
"What?" SG says. "I just wanted to know about your life. What did you think I asking?"
"Uh…" Julie replies. "Nothing. So, I was created when someone put a picture of Megan Fox, A Godzilla action figure and some ravioli in the microwave. When they opened the microwave I was in it as a little baby. I was then raised by a sock puppet till I literally left the nest when I was six and five-sixths. Then I got a job at McDonalds. And I've been working there ever since. Was that the answer you wanted?"
"Not really." SG says. "I actually…"
"Look someone's at the door!" Julie says rushing off to see who it is. She opens the door to see a redhead girl standing next to a dirty blonde haired boy.
"Hi," the redhead girl said. "I'm Jenny and this is my sidekick Toby."
"I'm Julie!" Julie replies.
"Can you help me?" Jenny asks. "We've gotten lost. Do you know the way out?"
"Yeah," Julie says. "Just take the first door to the right and straight on 'til morning."
"Cool," Jenny replies. "Sorry to bug you but Toby here lost the map!"
"No, I didn't!" Toby yells. "You folded it and tried putting it in the drink machine which destroyed it!"
"Shut your face Toby!" Jenny screams.
"At least my face doesn't scare children for life," Toby replies.
"YOUR MOM!" Jenny replies. "Hey, what are you guys doing in there?"
"Cooking like were southern!" Julie replies. Julie walks in the kitchen and motions Jenny and Toby to follow.
"Cool!" Jenny says. "Can we help?"
"Na." Julie replies. "Were good."
Suddenly a crash of dishes is heard. As Julie, Jenny and Toby turn around they see Noah and Nellie covered with gravy and broken dishes on the floor.
"You're a horrible aim." Nellie tells Noah.
"Shut up!" Noah yells. He pushes Julie aside as he walks out. "I'm going to go clean up."
"What happened?" Mikey asks.
"Noah was being sarcastic." Nellie replies. "I simply stated I believe he is being sarcastic because he is using it as defense due to bullying related to his intellect and small size. I said it wasn't a big deal because he isn't really a victim in this world as much as the ill or injured."
"You really need to be more tactful hon," Leshawna says.
"Now we get to make the gravy all over again," Gwen complains.
"Well, were gonna go." Jenny says. "Bye!"
"Bye!" Julie replies.
Jenny and Toby walk out the door and down the hall. Jenny starts singing. "We got lost in a kitchen. We got lost in a kitchen, We got lost in the kitchen. Technically we got lost in a hallway and I want a pony."
Noah is shown in the confessional. "Where does Nellie get off trying to read who I am? Acting like she knows all about pain and suffering...she doesn't. The only one worse than Nellie here is Julie; she thinks she can be the new Izzy. There was only one Izzy, and I refuse to let this new girl try and replace her. May you rest in peace, Izzy."
Meanwhile in The Bulldog's kitchen, Chef and DJ have finished making the mix for the crepe.
"Not bad DJ," Chef says patting DJ on the back.
"Um, thanks Chef," DJ replies.
"Listen DJ, I'm sorry about that alliance we had in TDA," Chef lies. "As you know I was treated horribly by Chris on this show. If I had half of the money, I wouldn't need to keep the job. It never mattered about making you more of a man. The truth is DJ, you were all ready a man. You stuck by your beliefs despite people questioning it. That's strong."
"Wow...thanks Chef." DJ says. "Do you mean that?"
"Of course," Chef lies.
"Well, I understand why you did it," DJ says. "And I'm actually...uh, glad your on my team Chef."
"Of course," Chef replies. "Now could you go get a few more raspberries."
DJ nods and walks off.
Chef Hatchet is shown in the confessional. "Except that your beliefs made you a wuss! Can you buy your mama her way back to Jamaica with sticking to your morals? Kid, you've screwed up three times because you were to sissy to do what's right. And now you're gonna screw up again."
A knock is heard at the door. Bradley opens the door to see a redheaded girl with a dirty blonde haired boy outside.
"Hi!" The redheaded girl says. "I'm Jenny! Me and my sidekick here Toby got lost and were wondering if you can tell us the way out."
"Sure," Bradley replies. "Farthest door to the right.
"I told you so Toby!" Jenny mocks.
"No, you didn't," Toby states. "You just kept singing and singing and singing!"
"You love my singing!" Jenny replies.
"No, I don't," Toby says. "Why would I like the sound of tone deaf cats dying while they give birth?"
"YOUR MOM!" Jenny replies. "Hey what are you guys doing in there?"
Jenny and Toby step in the kitchen.
"Cooking," Bradley replies suspicious. "What are you-"
"-Can we help you?" Jenny interrupts.
Bradley shakes his head. "I appreciate free labor, but we aren't allowed any."
At the same time Barbie is bringing Chef and DJ the finished whipped cream. Heather sees the goth and smirks. She sticks out his leg and trips Barbie, knocking her down on the floor as she drops the whipped cream which falls over her and the floor. Everyone (except Barbie, DJ, Cosmic River, Jenny and Toby) laughs at Barbie.
"Barbie look what you did," Bradley states. "Clean this mess you made up."
"Wow," Toby says. "You're jerks."
"Agreed." Jenny states. "I'm going to make sure you don't win this challenge at all."
"Wait how did you know this is a…"
But before Bradley can finish Jenny and Toby head to the door.
Later, everyone is finished and have their food in front of Rhonda who is sitting at a panel with two empty seats next to her. Chris is standing to the side.
"Wow everything sure looks good," Rhonda replies. "You guys ready to finish this?"
Everyone nods.
"Great!" Rhonda replies. "Lets see if our secret judges agree. Come on out guys!"
The contestants gasp as Jenny and Toby walk out and sit at the panel.
"Are they the judges?" Lindsay asks.
"No were Santa Claus," Toby replies sarcastically.
"But it's not Easter," Lindsay replies.
"These are two of my good friends," Rhonda says. "And the hosts of the aftermath since both Bridgette and Geoff are on the show.
Now you saw them earlier when they stopped at your kitchen, saying they got lost and asking for the way out. Really, they were looking at what you were doing because your also going to be judged on your teamwork."
"What?" Bradley asks.
"You heard me," Rhonda replies. "Were going to start by judging the food and then Jenny and Toby will tell us what they saw. So lets start with the Fun Bunch's team."
The three judges taste the food and smile.
"Wow this is great!" Rhonda exclaims. "I really enjoy this cherry pie."
"Thank ya'" Leshawna replies.
"Hey guys," Toby says. "I don't feel so good."
"You look in the mirror?" Jenny teases.
"Oh shut…"
But before Toby can finish he passes out onto the floor.
Lindsay shrieks. "Ew he is swelling!"
"Jenny inject him with the EpiPen!" Rhonda yells. "His lungs are swelling! He's losing oxygen!"
Jenny pulls out an EpiPen out of her pocket and injects Toby with it.
"What did you add to that pie?" Jenny asks angrily.
"Some sugar, a few extra cherries, and this cinnamon," LeShawna states pulling out the jar of cinnamon and giving it to Rhonda.
"According to my french dictionary," Rhonda says. "Épices citrouille Cannelle means pumpkin cinnamon spice! I told you not to add pumpkins!"
"Toby is allergic to pumpkins and potatoes," Jenny states. "If he touches them he starts swelling uncontrollably. Your carelessness almost killed him! You dummy!"
A redheaded intern comes in and puts Toby in a stretcher, carrying him offscreen.
The two remaining judges eat The Bulldogs food and give it a good review. They then do the same with Team Adamantine 's meal. "Now Jenny who did the best working as a team?"
"I'd have to say Team Adamantine," Jenny replies. "I saw Jovi patch up a conflict with Courtney. Also I saw Jovi making sure everyone worked equally."
"And the other two teams?" Rhonda asks.
"Well, the Fun Bunch did okay," Jenny says. "They refused my help but I did see Nellie and Noah fighting. Haha, their names both start with N. But yeah...nothing was done to get the two to apologize.
The Bulldogs did the worse. They kinda refused the offered help, but only cause it was against the rules. Then their own captain yelled at Barbie for falling, after someone else tripped her and most everyone laughed at her."
"Not to mention they made fun of her the whole time," Cosmic River adds.
"Really?" Bradley asks annoyed.
"I believe in the truth man," Cosmic River replies.
"Well, it is clear the winners are Team Adamantine," Rhonda announces. "They made a great meal and worked as a team." Team Adamantine cheers.
"As such they won the reward," Chris states.
"Bulldogs you treated a teammate inhumanely," Rhonda states. "It's clear you worked worse as a team. Other team, you strayed from the recipe, broke the most important rule and almost killed Toby. And you had a fight that no one worked to resolve. Give me and Jenny a minute and we'll decide who is the loser."
A few minutes later, Rhonda and Jenny have decided the losing team.
"And," Rhonda begins. "The losing team is…
"The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice. We'll see you at elimination tonight."
Later on the plane, a few minutes before elimination, Julie, SG, Mikey and Nellie are chatting when Sierra comes rushing in.
"Julie, I think you might be in danger!" Sierra exclaims. "Noah was trying to tell me to vote off you, saying the original contestants need to stick together. I lied and said I agreed."
"He said the same thing to me," Nellie admits. "But I'm not going with him."
SG raises his voice. "I think Leshawna maybe targeting you Julie. I think she's the best choice personally."
Julie blushes. "Aw, thanks you guys for trying to protect me. I think it's clear Leshawna is starting this campaign because she's on the chopping block. The only thing to do is for all of us to vote off Leshawna. Agreed?"
Everyone nods.
Leshawna is shown in the confessional. "Well, elimination is about to start. Noah tried to persude Nellie and Sierra and Gwen talked to SG . I would myself, but they'd think I was just trying to save my own skin. Lets hope at least one of them votes for Julie so I can at least fight her in a tiebreaker challenge. I know their voting for me after how I did in the challenge. Oh well. I can only hope at this point."
Later at the ceremony, The Fun Bunch have arrived.
"Well, tonight one of you is going home," Chris states. "You've all voted for who you want to leave. As you can see, Rhonda has seven barf-bags filled with airline issue peanuts. If you do not receive a bag you must take the Drop Of Shame. The first person safe is...
...SG."
"...Gwen, Sierra and Mikey." Rhonda states.
"...Noah and Nellie." Chris says. "And the final bag goes to...
...Julie."
Julie, Sierra, Mikey and SG cheer. Leshawna sighs and high fives Gwen and Noah. She then takes the Drop Of Shame. Back in the front of the plane, Chris and Rhonda are shown piloting the plane.
"Well, that concludes another episode of Total Drama." Chris says. "Hope to see you next time on Total Drama What The Heck?"
Chapter 4 Denial Ain't Just A River In Egypt
Chris and Rhonda are shown cockpit. "Last time on Total Drama." Chris begins. "Are contestants formed teams and had dinner. Then the next day they went to their first challenge in Paris, France."
"The contestants had to cook me and two mystery judges a meal," Rhonda continues. "And it was a bit heated in the kitchen; Courtney and Jovi became friends, Gwen tried to convince SG that Julie is a villian, and Bradley convinced Duncan they were allies.
Each team was then visited by a mysterious girl named Jenny and her sidekick Toby. It was later revealed they were the mystery judges and had judged the teams on teamwork, which would determine the winner along with how good they cooked."
"Team Adamantine passed with flying colors," Chris states. "While Julie's team blew it by using a forbidden ingredient, pumpkin, causing Toby to have an allergic reaction, curtesy of Leshawna. This and Leshawna's strategic planning got her voted off.
So all in all, it sucks to be Leshawna. Will Gwen try to get Julie eliminated again? Will Bradley succeed in his schemes? Will Courtney and Jovi remain friends? And who will be voted off next? Find out on Total Drama What The Heck?"
(The theme song plays)
Julie's team are in the Economy Section looking depressed after their lose.
"This sucks," Mikey says.
"No really?" Noah replies.
"Aww cheer up guys," Julie says closing her purple laptop and proceeding to do a flip. "It's been two days since the last challenge and now we can make sure we take the gold! Were like the power rangers, or the sailor scouts or Batman or really any good guy."
"Why are you so cheery?" Noah asks. "You were moping a while ago."
"I was" Julie replies. "But then I saw my awesome character picture on Total Drama Island Fanfiction Wiki! It got my hair just right!"
"Julie is right," Sierra says. "We can win the challenge today and take the cake along with first class."
"What flavor is the cake?" Mikey asks. "Is it coconut? I love coconut cake!"
"The cake is a lie!" Julie screams.
"I doubt we'll win," Nellie states. "We don't cooperate well and are down by a member, meaning we're at a huge disadvantage. The odds are not in our favor. Not that it really matters since we'll all eventually become dead bodies being digested by earthworms' stomach juices."
"She has a point," Gwen says sighing. "Were not the best team myself included."
"We were doomed the mintue we formed," Noah adds.
"What do you think Puddin?" Julie asks.
"I don't know," SG replies, looking out the window. "I mean we only lost because of one person's mistake...so maybe we could still have a chance...maybe."
Julie squeezes SG. "Thank you Puddin! See, SG's on the right track."
SG blushes as Julie cartwheels to her laptop. He smiles, before frowning and sighing.
"Come on guys!" Mikey says. "Were not giving up before the challenge has even started are we?"
"I totally agree with Mikey." Julie says. "Were awesome and have awesome skillz! We'll do great at the challenge. After all…'It's Friday, Friday, Gotta get down on Friday! Everybody's lookin' forward to the weekend, weekend!' "
The others just stare.
"What?" Julie asks. "This fanfiction was bound to have a Rebecca Black reference eventually. I mean every other one does. Whatever I'm in a good mood and I'm going to be happy. I'm gonna get away from your negativity and do what I do best."
"Talk nonsense," Noah states.
"Add more comic relief to this story!" Julie replies. "Which I guess is kind of the same thing."
SG is shown in the confessional. "I want to believe that Julie isn't faking being nice to me...but the more I think about it, the more it makes sense. I mean, she has a mysterious past and just shows up on the show, then immediately starts trying to be get me of my shell. I mean...it's like she just wants to bring me to another world for no other reason than because and it feels good... but, it sounds like a bad trope from a TV series than reality. She must have another agenda."
Meanwhile Rhonda is alone in the cafeteria typing on her computer. She is calm and serene and is actually….
"HEY RHONDA!" Julie screams popping up behind Rhonda. "What'cha doing?"
Rhonda was so startled she fell off the seat. "Hey Julie. I'm not doing much, what are you doing )besides scaring me and creating comic relief)."
"Nothing," Julie says looking at Rhonda's story.
"Oh thanks for helping me get up," Rhonda says standing up. "And don't read that. I'm very shy about my writing."
"I would be too if I had such bad grammar." Julie says. "I mean first, there are a couple of places where you have a speaker change without a paragraph break. Also, you sometimes use "your" (the possessive) when you mean "you're" (the contraction of "you are") and "were" when you meant "we're" (the contraction of "we are").
Gosh Rhonda you think you would have learned that from fifth grade. I mean I did, and every time I see a banana I pretend it's a phone."
"Julie why don't you go bug Chris or something," Rhonda says trying and failing to snatch her laptop.
"I tried, he's in the john," Julie replies continuing to read Rhonda's story. "And why did you include this event and act like something big was going to come from it and then it is never mentioned again."
"You haven't even been reading that for five minutes, how much could you have possibly read?" Rhonda asks, pulling out here frying pan.
"And what kind of ending was that?" Julie asks. "They went through all that just for nothing. In fact it seems things are worse now for them now."
"I haven't even finished the story!" Rhonda states, swinging her frying pan.
"Oh," Julie states, running. "I think I hear SG calling me. COMING PUDDIN!"
Rhonda smirks picks up her laptop. "And next time I'll throw you out of the plane!"
In first class, Rosamond, Jovi and Courtney are sitting in a circle eating ice cream leftovers from last night.
Rosamond pets Beetlejuice. "It sucks that movie night is over. It was fun watching all those comedy movies last night."
Courtney raises her eyebrows, "We had a horror movie marathon."
"We'll just win a better prize today," Jovi states confidently. "We are the preeminent team after all."
"Well, we do have some of the best players," Courtney adds. "And not the worse, like Duncan."
"Please don't be offended Courtney," Jovi says. "But I think you're over obsessing about him. You're better than him, and could do better as well."
"He kind of seems like a bit of softie anyway," Rosamond whispers. "My little Coraline says he 'cooed' at her."
Courtney laughs, but then sighs. "Thanks, I guess I have been too hung up on him. It's just hard when..."
A sudden large cry from the corner is heard, as Taylor bursts into tears once again. "This is sundae is just like my old boyfriend! Cool, sweet...and filled with sprinkles. OH THE SPRINKLES!!!"
"Does she ever cease moaning about her ex," Jovi sighs.
"Have you never been cheated on?" Courtney asks.
"Well...no," Jovi replies.
"Then you have no idea what it feels like," Courtney says.
"Oh god," Jovi replies. "My apologies Courtney, I wasn't even thinking. It isn't my place to judge."
"Aww guys stop being so sad!" Rosamond says. "Then I'll be sad. I'm sure you'll find someone better. You just have to wait for the right guy."
"Like a detective," Jovi whispers.
"What?" Rosamond asks.
"Nothing, " Jovi teases.
"But you…nevermind." Rosamond says rolling her eyes. "If you pardon me, I'm going to the restroom."
Rosamond (and her cats) walk off to the restroom.
"So what was that about a detective?" Courtney asks when Rosamond is out of sight.
"I suspect Rosamond is in love with her childhood friend, a kid decetive," Jovi replies.
"Young love," Courtney says giggling. "Wait do you think he is watching the show? Then he might realize she likes him."
"I asked Rosamond and she said he was too busy solving cases to watch though he said he would be given summaries from their friend Annie," Jovi replies. "I theorize Annie will not mention Rosamond's crush on Nate. I believe Rosamond doesn't even realizes she has a crush on him."
At the same time Bridgette and Geoff are making out (shocking I know) on the sofa. Justin and Trent are at the bar. Justin is looking in the mirror while Trent watches Bridgette and Geoff make out.
Trent sighs. "They make the perfect couple. They never seem to have any problems."
"Dude, you haven't been able to be in a stable relationship since your breakup with Gwen," Justin replies. "Get over her."
"I'm over her...she's just the best girl I've ever been with," Trent tries to explain.
"Like it really matters," Justin says winking at himself in the mirror.
Trent rolls his eyes.
Trent is shown in the confessional. "I'm not happy with my team. I feel so alone, everyone's off in their own little groups and here I am alone...again. I guess I should be use to it. I've got the worst luck."
Bradley is then shown in the confessional. "I've got the worst luck. I almost cost us the challenge. And while I doubt I would've gone home, I've got to stop making fun of her. It does paint a bad image, and I don't that get DJ and Cosmic River on my side."
Meanwhile, Cosmic River and DJ are sitting alone in a section of the loser class. Cosmic River is humming to himself and looks over at DJ, who is looking at a picture with sad eyes while petting Bunny.
"What's wrong man?" Cosmic River asks.
DJ looks up. "Oh, nothing…"
"Brah I can feel your depressed vibes." Cosmic River replies. "What's the picture of?"
"It's a picture of me and my mom when I was little," DJ replies.
"You miss your mom," Cosmic River replies. "Don't worry man, you'll see her soon."
"It's not just that I miss her," DJ says. "It's that…I feel like I've let her down."
"You haven't let her down," Cosmic River says. "Why would you feel like that?"
"I've been on this show for four seasons trying to win the money to take my momma back home to Jamaica,” DJ answers. “And every season it's my own mistakes that cause me to lose.
My cowardliness has lead me to be so scared; I freaked out at Heather shaving her legs, was pressured into an alliance with Chef, and was so hysterical I believed in a curse. And I failed to think rationally in any of those situations.”
"Hey man," Cosmic River says. "You'll get her there. You have this season to try. And if you don't win you'll get there somehow. Just believe."
"I have a hard time in believing," DJ replies.
"Man," Cosmic River says. "The only reason you lost is because you’re in tune to your heart. I can be the same way. There is no reason to be upset over that; it means you’re a good person.
The problem was you weren’t in control of your feelings. You have to understand what your feelings mean, but not let them make your decisions. But, seeing you have a problem is the first step."
"Wow," DJ says smiling. "Thanks, I feel a little better now. So, do you miss your parents?"
Cosmic River sighs. "I haven't seen my parents in awhile."
"Why," DJ asks. "Did something happen to them?"
"Well," Cosmic River says. "About four years ago I was a different person. It wasn’t just that I didn’t care about the earth; I robbed, I picked on people, and got into a lot of scraps with people. I…I hurt a lot of people.
But then one day I met a man preaching about environmental rights. He did it with passion and cause…it was groovy. But I was a bully and I stole some food from the man. The next day I had stolen some car parts and I was splitting the scene. As I left I tripped and hurt my leg. And right in front of me was the old man I had stolen from.
I was afraid he would call the cops or yell at me. But instead he helped me up and offered some of his lunch.
I ate with him and asked, “Why are you helping me after I stole from you?”
He replied that he was a peaceful man and didn't hold grudges. He told me all about his lifestyle. But more importantly he taught me about Earth. How it is helped us survive, then enjoy life. It was groovy. But then taught me how we are mistreating Earth and it's other inhabitants; killing them like a massacre with their homes and their families. Then he told me about how we torture others over material things. It…wasn't so groovy.
He had explored the world and seen so many vivid things. It was after that, that I decided to become a hippie. I turned myself in and did community service. I completed my service and helped all the people I hurt. And soon everyone forgave me."
"Wow," DJ says. "But what do this have to do with your parents?"
"Oh yeah," Cosmic River says. "Before I became groovy my parents weren't very proud of me. My dad was a former solider (and now lawyer) and my mom works at a branch of a giant industrial company. After I started acting well they were kinda proud.
…But they soon grew upset of my new lingo use and didn't like my threads. My dad didn't approve of my love of peace and neither liked that I cared about the environment. I just wanted them to do small things like recycle. But they wouldn't try. I think they even tried to do the opposite to bug me.
I got really mad but I didn’t let my emotions control. The man I met taught me that. He taught me a lot, like non-violent protesting; it was a gas. He promised me, after I finished high school could leave home, we would travel the world and I would meet all his friends. But my parents refused. I had to sneak out to see him."
"What happened," DJ asks. "Did you and your mentor run away early?"
Cosmic River looks up and sighs. "…He pasted away. I was so upset. …… But as he taught me it was his time. Right before he died he gave me the headband he wore. And I forever decided to be called Cosmic River like he was.
DJ was crying and hugged Cosmic River. "I am so sorry man."
"It's okay man," Cosmic River replies. “It was the circle of life. But…after he died my parents were so rude. Only after a day after it happened my dad asked if I was going to stopping acting like a hippie now. So I ran away.
And then I bumped into the old man's younger brother and his wife and two kids. They accepted me and let me travel with them. We traveled to many places and I met many of my mentor's friends. I was so happy. I haven't seen my parents after I left. I don't think they even care I'm gone man."
DJ is balling.
"Aw cat don't cry," Cosmic River says.
Suddenly a crash sound is heard.
"Brah, what do you think that sound was?" Cosmic River asks.
"I don't know but let's make sure it is nothing serious," DJ replies, wiping away tears and sitting his bunny down. "Stay here Bunny; it could be dangerous."
Bradley comes rushing off from the side smirking. “Step one, throwing the football in the vent to get rid of the babies, crying about who knows what now. Step two…”
Bradley steps in front of Bunny, holding a squirming rat.
“No don’t, that’s DJ’s pet!” Bradley shouts as he pretends to wrestle the rat. Cosmic River and DJ turn around. Bradley punches the fat rat and throws it away. The rat scurries off sadly, whimpering. radley picks up Bunny and presents him to DJ.
"Thanks so much!" DJ cries as he hugs Bunny.
"I was happy to," Bradley says. "I’m an animal lover."
"Really?" DJ asks.
"Yup," Bradley says rubbing the back of his head ‘bashfully’. "I know it seems weird for an athlete to like animals but I love them."
" I don't judge man," Cosmic River replies. "And it's like noble of you to love animals. Who doesn't?"
"Thanks, that means a lot to me," Bradley lies. "I was actually coming here to talk to you guys. I know that I was kind of rough on Barbie but… I saw that her luggage and some of her outfits were made from animals. And that just…made me angry."
"She does?" DJ asks.
Bradley nods.
"I understand that," Cosmic River says putting his hand on Bradley's shoulder. "But we can't just go treating people like that. We can find another way to bring vengeance to those animals that doesn't require such violent ways.
"I understand that now,” Bradley says. "And I agree. We should work together to vote her off."
Suddenly the PA system goes off. All contestants please get ready for the next challenge we are landing soon. And please put on your swimsuits; it’s about time we showed some skin to get ratings. We have set up changing stations for you around the plane.”
Later at the elimination room, Barbie is about to enter the female changing room when Heather comes in and pushes her away.
"Like anyone wants to see you in a swimsuit," Heather states.
Barbie just sighs and waits outside.
A little later most of the contestants are waiting for the challenge. SG, Nellie and Mikey are chatting while Rhonda is playing (and losing) a game called 'Flight Simulator'.
"Hey!" Julie greets, as she and Sierra walk over to the Fun Bunch.
"Wow Sierra!" Mikey exclaims. "I like the uh, new swimsuit."
Sierra is wearing a rather fancy bathing suit, which looks like a mermaid.
"Thanks but Julie gave it to me," Sierra states. "I forgot to pack mine. Where did you get it?"
"I got it when I went to Paradise, a city near Paradise Beach." Julie replies.
"Me too!" SG blurts. "It's one of my favorite places, my family goes there every summer."
SG blushes and Julie winks at him. "I've got a whole trunk of costumes, if you guys ever want to borrow any."
"Where do mermaids even come from?" Sierra asks.
"Myth," Nellie states.
Mikey scratches his head. "Well my cousin said that mermaids are what happens when humans and fish love each other...more than society allows and that they..."
Sierra laughs. "I think your cousin told you a story. Hmm...that does give me a new idea for a yaoi fanfiction though..."
"Hey Rhonda?" Julie asks. "Are we going to the beach for a challenge?"
Rhonda shakes her head.
"Kthxbai." Julie says.
"What?" Rhonda asks.
"Kay thanks bye," Heather explains. "Gosh Rhonda you are some not modern."
"And frumpy," Duncan adds.
"And display psychotic behavior along with mood swings," Jovi adds. “It’s a bit worrying…”
"And you do the stupidest things," Noah says.
"And have no talent," Chef says.
“And know such weird losers,” Bradley mentions.
"Another generic comment about how Rhonda sucks!" Julie squeals.
"You know I don't have to be here." Rhonda says angrily.
"What else are you going to do?" Bradley asks. "It's not like you have a social life."
"Ha ha good one." Chris says.
"Really Chris? Really?" Rhonda asks.
"Whatever Rhonda, I do what I want. No need to be jealous of me," Chris replies.
"Why would I be jealous of you?" Rhonda asks half laughing, half offended.
"Come on, go easy on Rhonda!" Sierra protests, causing Rhonda to smile.
Chris rolls his eyes. "Anyway, like last time were going to have a special reward for today's challenge!"
"As some of you noticed," Rhonda says. "There is a locked door on the plane. In that room is a…five star pool! From now on the winners will get to use the pool. And whoever wins this time will have a special pool party!"
"Why in the world would you build a pool on a plane?" Nellie asks depressingly. "So someone could drown while the plane crashes into the ocean?"
"The pool will be probably be a plot device," Julie replies. "Or an excuse for more fanservice."
"Anyway were here!" Rhonda states.
The plane opens up as the contestants see they have arrived in Egypt.
"We're here again?" Heather complains.
"Yes, but were going to be doing challenges completely different from last time." Rhonda says. "Now we have decided to let all of you know that…"
"WAIT!" Julie screams. "I have something I'd like to say!"
"What?" Rhonda asks a bit annoyed.
Julie coughs and says...
"PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA PAJAMA!"
"You know I'm not even surprised by your randomness anymore Julie," Rhonda replies. "I kind of expected you to do something like that."
"Aw you hurt my feelings," Julie snickers. "I guess...I'll have to try harder next time."
"Please don't," Rhonda begs.
"I feel like you just issued me a challenge," Julie teases.
"Oh god," Rhonda sighs.
"Hey Rhonda wanna hear a joke?" Mikey asks.
"Um okay," Rhonda replies.
"What did the pony with the soar throat say?" Mikey asks.
"Wait, is the joke multiple choice?" Rhonda asks.
"Sorry but I'm a little horse!" Mikey says laughing.
Sierra giggles. "You're so funny Mikey!"
"Aw thanks," Mikey says blushing.
"I don't get it." Rhonda states.
…A few awkward minutes pass by.
"Well you managed to waste seven minutes of my life," Chris states. "Now lets get the challenge."
The scene changes to near the Pyramids where three big wheels, a large and very high container of water, a tube and a huge table with puzzle pieces are shown. The contestants and hosts are dropped off by bus, driven by a redheaded intern.
"For this challenge," Chris begins. "Three contestants will be strapped to the wheel. Three other people will spin the wheel. The three on the wheel will rotate and eventually submerging in a tub of water. They will need to hold as much as they can, and then spit it back out into the tubes.
"Once the tube is full," Rhonda contiunes. "One person must complete. The puzzle must be made into a pyrmaid that displays your team emblem. It had to be a pyramid because apparently you can't go to Egypt and not use pyramids in your story. It's like a law here or something."
"First team to finish wins an advantage in the next and last part of the challenge," Chris adds. "Second to finish will be better off than third. Now are there any questions before we began?"
Mikey raises his hand.
"Yes, Mikey?" Chris says.
"Did you get this challenge from Survivor?" Mikey asks.
"Any other questions?" Chris asks.
Julie raises her hand.
"Yes, Julie?" Chris says.
"Why didn't you answer Mikey's question?" Julie asked.
"Any other questions not about Mikey's question?" Chris asked.
Rosamond raises her hand.
"Yes, Rosamond?" Chris asks.
"Why can't we asks questions about Mikey's question?" Rosamond asks.
"Why did you ask that when I said not to?" Chris asks.
"Why did you answer my question with a question?" Rosamond asks.
"ANYMORE QUESTIONS!" Chris yells.
Lindsay raises her hand.
"What do you want Lindsay?" Chris asks.
"You said one person works at the puzzle, three turn the wheel and three are on the wheel. Team Adamantine and our team have eight. What happens to one of our members?" Lindsay asks.
Chris stares back. "Really?"
"What Chris means to say," Rhonda explains. "…Is that one person on both teams must sit out. The team captain will pick who will sit out over there on those benches. However, no one can sit out two times in a row, even if it's a future challenge. Now who is sitting out?"
"Well, it's clear the Blob over there will sit out," Heather states pointing out Barbie, while Bradley nods.
"Alright," Rhonda says. "Jovi who is sitting out on your team?"
"I'll do it," Justin volunteers walking away to the benches.
"Thanks for answering Jovi," Jovi replies rolling her eyes.
"Team captain's assign the roles and well get started," Chris states.
The Fun Bunch discuss who will do what.
"I should solve the puzzle, being the smartest," Noah says.
"Actually I think SG is the smartest," Julie says teasingly. "But I know you can do it."
"And SG's muscles will be more useful spinning the wheel," Sierra points.
Noah opens his mouth, but decides to say nothing. The team decides Sierra, Nellie and Julie will be on the wheel while Gwen SG and Mikey spin it, and Noah completes the puzzle.
The Bulldogs decide Lindsay, Cosmic River and Duncan will be on the wheel, DJ, Bradley and Chef will spin and Heather will complete the puzzle.
Team Adamantine decides Bridgette and Taylor will be on the wheel, while Geoff, Trent and Rosamond will spin the wheel. After a heated debate and a rock-scissors-paper duel, Jovi begrudgingly agrees to let Courtney solve the puzzle instead of Jovi herself, who will do the puzzle.
"All right everyone ready?" Chris asks.
"I have to pee," Lindsay says.
"Go!" Chris yells.
The Bulldogs spin the wheel fastest.
Team Adamantine spins second fastest.
The Fun Bunch spin third fastest but are very close to the other team's two wheels.
Lindsay goes down for water.
Jovi, Julie and Duncan go down for water.
Bridgette, Cosmic River and Sierra go down for water.
"Nick why?" Taylor cries. "Why did you cheat on me with that bit..."
But Taylor goes down for water before she can finish, along with Nellie, while Lindsay spits her's out.
Jovi spits her water out with Duncan right after her.
Cosmic River spits his water out.
Bridgette spits her out while Julie does the same and Lindsay goes down for more.
"You're like pelican fly!" Julie sings. "I mean, you're so shy and I'm loving your tie. You're like slicker than the guy with the thing on his eye, oh! Yes I did, yes I did, somebody please tell him who the F I is! I am Julie, I break the fourth wall, I flirt with my Puddin and I'm so tall!"
"I think she has lost it," Gwen says.
"Did she ever have it?" Noah asks.
Sierra spits her water out as Taylor tries to do the same but fails because she is crying.
“WHY! Was it the hat? I thought the hat was cool but if you didn’t…”
Duncan goes down and Nellie spits her water out. Jovi goes down.
Cosmic River goes down as Julie does and Lindsay spits her water out.
The Fun Bunch catches up to Team Adamantine as Sierra and Bridgette go down for water.
Duncan spits his out water.
"Is it time we stop spinning yet?" Lindsay asks. "I think I'm going to be sick.”
“Not as sick as those poor unfortunate people dying of malaria,” Nellie says, before going down for water.
Taylor goes down for water but fails to get any. Cosmic River spits his out followed by Julie.
"Fighting evil by moonlight. Winning love by daylight!" Julie sings. "Never running from a real fight! She is the one named Julie. She will never turn her back on a friend, but may turn sideways. She is always there to defend unless on lunch break. She is the one on who we can depend. She is the one named Julie."
Lindsay goes down for more as Jovi spits her water out followed by Sierra.
Duncan goes down for water as Nellie and Bridgette spit their water out.
Taylor passes the tube as Julie goes for more water.
Lindsay spits her water out.
Duncan spits his water out as Jovi and Sierra go down for water. Duncan fills the tube and Heater quickly starts on the puzzle.
Nellie goes down for more water, as does Bridgette a little later.
Julie spits her water out and get's a lot out, enough to fill the tube. Noah quickly begins on the puzzle.
Taylor goes down for water and collects some.
Heather and Noah continue to work on the puzzle while Jovi spits out more water.
Heather finishes the puzzle and screams, "Done!"
Noah finishes a few seconds later and yells, "Finished!"
Rhonda inspects Heather's puzzle and announces, "The Bulldog's are done!"
Bridgette spits out her water.
Rhonda inspects SG's puzzle and says, "The Fun Bunch are done!"
Team Adamantine groan as Taylor mutters something about her boyfriend. The Bulldogs cheer and holler and The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice…just kind of shrug their shoulders.
We're In Jeopardy!
Later, the teams are at the Nile, where rows of seats are suspended above the river with a diving board attached to them. In the middle of the Nile is a big stage with a large screen and a podium. Several poorly made rafts are tied to the stage. Benches are seen across the Nile.
"Any guesses on the last part of our challenge?" Chris asks.
"Is it Yahtzee?" Julie asks excitedly.
"No," Chris replies. "For the last part of the challenge will be doing something similar to Jeopardy. Like Jeopardy we have five categories of questions each with five questions. The categories are Modern Egypt, Ancient Egyptian Mythology, Egyptian Flora, Egyptian Fauna, and Egyptian Mummies. Each of the five questions has a point value of 100 to 500 points.”
“Starting with our winners,” Rhonda continues. “Each team will choose a question to answer. If they get it right they receive that many points. If they get it wrong it will go to the next team who can choose to pass it up, or steal it and answer the question, but run the risk of losing. If you are wrong then whichever team get's it right chooses one teammate to be eliminated. If you’re eliminated then you must jump into the Nile and raft yourself to the benches.”
The contestants look at the Nile, and notice a crocodile eyeing them, before it flashes a grin and sinks back into the water.
If no gives the right answer,” Chris says. “Then we'll draw a name for each team that got it wrong, and whoever's name it is will be eliminated. If all your players are eliminated then you lose. After all the questions have been read whoever has the most points wins unless all the other two teams are eliminated first. One question is secretly worth double the amount labeled and will be revealed when it is chosen.
And all answers must be phrased as a question. Any questions?"
Mikey raises his hand.
"Yes, Mikey?" Chris asks.
"Why have you still not answered my last question?" Mikey asks.
“Bulldogs, you go first,” Chris states. “Followed by the team with the long name. Since Team Adamantine came in last, you get the ‘reward’ of having to have two members sit out.”
"Can I go sit out?" Justin asks.
"You can't sit out again," Jovi replies annoyed.
"Just trying to help,” Justin says.
"Hey I don't know much if anything about Egypt so I wouldn't help much in this challenge. You want me to sit out captain?" Geoff asks.
"Thank you for offering,” Jovi replies. “Please do.”
Jovi is shown in the confessional. “I admit I was a…tiny bit stressed over my team’s current track record. A few certain people aren’t even trying; I’ve dealt with people like that before, but then I could pick up the slack. But here, I depend on these sloths. Why are you here if you aren’t going to try? Still…I wish I had handled situation better than I did…”
As Geoff makes his way to the bleachers Taylor starts to sob.
"Would you stop!” Jovi screams.
Taylor looks up and sniffles. "I'm sorry but I'm just so upset. Nick my ex watched Jeopardy with me once when nothing was on TV and I just…"
"I get it," Jovi replies. "Everything reminds you of your boyfriend. And you can’t stand on your own two legs without this man you’ve made your entire reason for living, instead of actually doing something for once! Why don't you go cry on the bleachers Taylor; that's all you're really good for!"
Taylor looks at Jovi and breaks down in tears and runs off to the bleachers. The others stare at her. Jovi sighs.
A few minutes later everyone is ready. The large screen displays Jeopardy tables.
"Bulldogs?”
" How about Modern Egypt for 100?" Bradley asks.
"Egypt's most recent and former president, he was president for thirty years and was overthrown recently."
"Who is Hosni Mubarak,” Bradley replies.
"Correct. Julie’s team?"
"Egyptian Fauna for 300." Julie says while her teammates nod in agreement.
"Mammals found in the Nile, they can weigh up to 3 metric tons and are mostly herbivorous."
"What is a hippo,” Noah replies.
"Correct. Adamantine?"
"Egyptian Fauna for…" Jovi starts.
"500," Justin says.
"A small, naturally spotted mammal, not only does its fur have spots but spots on its skin as well. One odd behavior of this animal is called 'wiggle-tail' in which it wiggles its tail like it is marking its territory… but doesn't release urine.”
"What is the Egyptian Mau," Rosamond replies excitedly.
"Correct! Bulldogs?"
While the Bulldogs decide on a question, Jovi whispers to Justin, "Don't say the amount when you clearly know nothing about Egypt. You could have cost us that!"
"You going to make me cry too?” Justin asks.
"Shut up," Jovi replies glaring.
“I was just trying to help,” Justin replies. “I’m confident in our team, we have several intelligent females on the team who I believe are smart enough for this.”
“He has a point there,” Courtney states.
“I just knew it was a cat,” Rosamond states, shrugging.
"We want Modern Egypt for 500," Bradley says hesitantly.
"This seven story modern building is located in Cairo, Egypt at the Gezira Exhibition Grounds, The first part of the name has Egypt's capital in it, and is similar to something famous in Sydney, Australia."
Time passes as most of the Bulldogs have blank faces.
"Sorry but you did not answer quick enough. Julie’s team, would you like to answer?"
They all shrug and shake their heads no.
"Adamantine?" Chris asks.
"We would like to steal," Courtney says smirking.
"We would?" Bridgette asks.
"What is the Cairo Opera House," Courtney replies.
"Correct." Chris says.
"How did you know that?" Jovi asks.
"I use to have a pen pal from Egypt in 5th grade," Courtney said. "He told one day he would take me there."
"Did he?" Bridgette asks.
Courtney sighs. "Sadly we lose contact. I sent him a letter but I never got a reply."
"Hate to pry, but what did the letter say?" Jovi asks.
Courtney rubs the back of her head. “Um…”
"Adamantine,” Chris interrupts. “You answered the question right and can eliminate one of the Bulldogs. Who do you chose?"
Team Adamantine huddles together.
"I think Bradley," Rosamond replies. "My cats don't like him; he and his whole team give us a sinister vibe…and not the good kind.
"Well?" Chris asks.
"Bradley." Jovi replies.
Bradley stares angrily and prepares to jump. He dives off and pulls himself up into a boat Chris passes him. He paddles to the bleachers without any trouble.
"All right, Julie’s team?”
"Egyptian Fauna for 100," Julie says.
"These mammals are commonly used to travel Egypt and store water in their humps."
"What is a camel," Noah replies.
"Correct," Rhonda says.
"That was easy," Sierra says.
"Does mean I can push the easy button?" Mikey asks.
"Team Adamantine," Rhonda says.
"Why does everyone refuse to answer my questions?" Mikey asks.
"Ancient Egyptian Mythology for 100," Jovi says.
"This goddess was the Egyptian feline goddess and was worshipped along with cats. She was worshipped in the Second Dynasty and her cult was called Bubastis."
"Who is Bastet," Rosamond replies happily.
"Correct."
"Bulldogs?" Chris asks.
"Egyptian Mummies for 200."
"This ceremony was done to restore the mummies' senses. It was usually done by the mummies' eldest son and the right leg would have been butchered for the occasion."
"What kind of a question is that?" Heather asks. “Seriously, why did we go to a country just to answer questions? Questions only an expert or someone who knew random trivia would know!
"Uh…was that your answer?" Rhonda asks tauntingly. "Because it wasn't in question form."
Heather ignores her and looks at her teammates. "Anyone know?"
“Know what?” Lindsay asks while Heather sighs.
"Time's up." Rhonda announces. "Julie’s team would you like to steal?"
“Yes we would,” Gwen states.
"Your answer?"
"What is The Opening Of The Mouth Ceremony," Gwen replies.
"Correct,” Rhonda replies. "You can choose one of the Bulldogs to be eliminated."
"Good job on the question," Mikey compliments. "How did you know?"
"I know my dead stuff," Gwen says.
"Since you got it right, why don't you pick who is eliminated?" Julie suggests.
"Who is eliminated?" Rhonda asks.
Gwen smiles evilly. "Heather."
"Whatever,” Heather replies. "I wish you'd fall and break your head!"
"Try not to get eaten by alligators," Gwen teases. “Or get your hair wet.”
"If you ever died I wouldn’t even cry about you," Heather replies. “You aren’t even worth it.”
"Ya right. If she was dead you would probably name your baby after her," Julie says.
Heather ignores the purple girl and jumps in the Nile, paddling towards the bleachers angrily.
Rhonda giggles. "Your turn again."
"Egyptian Flora for 100," Julie says.
"This flower is an aquatic plant and was worshipped in Ancient Egyptian Times. It even had its own festival."
"Lotus," Noah replies.
"Correct. Adamantine?"
"Egyptian Mythology for 300," Jovi states.
"This goddess wore a headdress shaped like a throne and was the ancient Egyptian goddess of motherhood, magic and fertility."
"It doesn't have to do with cats," Rosamond pouts.
"Um… Osiris," Jovi guesses after a time.
"Incorrect," Rhonda replies. "Bulldogs would you like to steal?"
"Pass," Chef replies.
"Fun Bunch would you like to steal?" Rhonda asks.
"Pass," Julie replies.
"Well, the answer was Isis," Rhonda says grabbing a tin that says Adamantine, and pulling out a name. "And… Trent is eliminated."
Trent sighs and dives off the board. He paddles out and makes his way towards the bleachers.
While the rest still compete Trent goes and sits in the top corner of the bleachers alone. He sees Taylor crying in the bottom corner in front of him and slides down towards her.
"Hey Taylor listen…"
"I know I messed up," Taylor replies wiping the tears out of her eyes. "But…Nick was my boyfriend since fifth grade. And we were friends before than: great friends. But, he cheated on me with a girl who bullies me all the time. You have no idea what that’s like."
"…I do,” Trent replies. "My last serious relationship was with Gwen. I tried to do everything to get her to want to be with me, I was willing to give up a million dollars for her…but in the end, she dumped me. On television, for the whole world to see, and then told my team to vote me off, aiding in my elimination. Ha, I guess I did end up giving her a million dollars. And to rub salt into the wound, she hooked up with Duncan: the guy who constantly bullies others, including me. I understand how you feel; even when they hurt you, you still love them…
“Oh…wow,” Taylor replies tearing up. “I’ve…I’ve been so self centered. I’ve been acting like I got a death sentence, but I’m not the only one with problems. I’m so sorry Trent, that sounds even worse than my breakup.”
Trent fakes a laugh. “I’m getting over it. And it’s fair to be upset about breakup; it hurts. I guess we both…we both need to move on. And if you ever need a shoulder to cry on, I’m here.”
“Could…could I have a hug?” Taylor asks. “A hug would be comforting.”
Trent nods and geniunely laughs, as Taylor sniffles and glomps Trent.
Later Chris and Rhonda are looking at the screen.
"So after Trent was eliminated it seems Courtney, Rosamond, Sierra, Chef, Duncan, Cosmic River and DJ have all been eliminated,” Chris says.
“The Bulldogs have 900 points, The Fun Bunch has 2400 points, and Team Adamantine has 1600 points,” Rhonda adds. “It's the Fun Bunch's turn and we only have 3 questions left."
"We all are aware of that," Jovi replies annoyed.
“So Fun Bunch which question would you like?" Chris asks.
"We'll take Ancient Egyptian Mythology for 300," Julie says.
"This Egyptian god is the lord of death. His green skin symbolizes rebirth.”
The Fun Bunch stare at each other for a while waiting for someone to answer. "Times up." Rhonda says.
"Adamantine would you like to steal?"
"Sure," Justin replies still admiring himself.
"I hate you so much…” Jovi whispers.
"What is your answer?" Rhonda asks.
"Um…who is Horus?" Jovi guesses.
"Incorrect," Rhonda replies. "Bulldogs would you like to steal?"
"Pass," Lindsay replies.
"The answer was Osiris." Rhonda replies.
"Really, I guessed that earlier,” Jovi mumbles.
"And the people eliminated are…Justin and Julie," Chris says pulling names out of a jar.
Jovi stares angrily as Justin puts his mirror away and jumps in the Nile.
"Farewell world and Starbucks," Julie cries as she jumps into the Nile.
Julie lands but without a big a splash. A hippo pops up from under her.
"I guess hippos really do live in the Nile." Julie says pulling the Hippo's ears. "Mush!"
The hippo surprisingly listens and takes her to the benches.
"All right Team Adamantine what question would you like?" Rhonda asks.
"Flora for 400," Jovi replies.
"Before I read the question, please note this question is worth double,” Chris announces. "Now then, this flower grew in the Nile; according to myth darkness covered the water until this flower opened it's petals revealing the sun god. The light from the god and the perfume from this flower banished the darkness. It was mistaken for a lotus during ancient times."
Bridgette and Jovi sigh.
"Times up," Chris announces. "Bulldogs would you like to steal?"
"Yes," Lindsay says. "What is the blue waterlily."
"Correct." Chris says. "How did you know that?"
"The myth is in my description for my nail polish Blue Waterlily," Lindsay replies.
"Well, in that case you know have 1700 points,” Rhonda states. “Which means Team Adamantine is now last and will lose unless they can answer the last question. Bulldogs, you can eliminate one of the members of Team Adamantine. Who do you choose?"
"We choose Jovi," Lindsay replies.
Jovi jumps into the Nile, mumbling to herself.
"And Bulldogs the last question is yours which is Mummies for 300," Rhonda says.
"This bird was offended mummified as a sacrifice for Horus and was captured or replaced by a common bird if one was not breed domestically.”
The Bulldogs do not reply.
"Time is up," Chris says. "Julie’s team, would you like to steal?"
“I wouldn’t like to steal in general,” Mikey replies. “And I guess not here either.”
"Team Adamantine would you like to steal?" Chris asks.
"Wait…my history teacher mentioned this!" Bridgette announces. "It’s a hawk!”
"That is correct!” Chris says.
"Yes!" Bridgette states, as the rest of her team cheers.
"But it was not in question form so you failed to answer the question right," Chris says.
"Really?" Jovi yells exasperated.
Chris nods smugly. "Which means, Team Adamantine is going to elimination and the team with the long name win first class and the pool party!"
Bridgette sighs as the Fun Bunch cheer.
Later on the plane, Taylor is alone when Jovi walks up to her.
"Taylor, I’d like to aplogize" Jovi says.
“Me too!” Taylor replies. “I wasn’t considering anyone else’s feelings; your anger was completely justified.”
“No it wasn’t,” Jovi replies. “As captain it’s suppose to be my job to remain calm. And I should have talked to you about your problem. I thought I could just ignore it and pull your weight with my own.”
“If I’d have just thought-“
“No,” Jovi interrupts. “As leader it’s my job to work with my team; I can’t expect to win singlehandedly, you’re a part of this team and I need to respect that and work with you. That was my fault. I’ve never been in your position, and I didn’t consider your feelings.”
Taylor forces a chuckle. “Sounds like we both suck.”
Jovi giggles. “I suppose we do. And I guess it might be one of us going home.”
“You think?” Taylor asks. “Truth is, I didn’t want to be here originally; my parents forced me on the show. Maybe it should be me.”
“I don’t want you to leave,” Jovi states. “You want to stay here now, don’t you?”
Taylor nods.
“I do know who I’d like to go,” Jovi says. “Hmm…”
Later Team Adamantine are at their elimination ceremony.
"When I call your name Rhonda will pass you a barf bag," Chris says. "And the first barf bag goes to…Geoff."
Geoff receives his barf bag.
"The next barfs bag go to…Rosamond, Trent and Courtney."
"Followed by…Bridgette and Jovi," Rhonda says.
Jovi and Trent both look nervously at Taylor.
"And the final barf bag goes to…
"Taylor. Justin you are eliminated."
"What?” Justin asks. “How?”
"You never tried and kept hindering us, and you’re surprised you’re eliminated?” Jovi asks annoyed.
"Whatever, I do what I want," Justin says as he jumps out of the plane.
Rhonda and Chris are shown back in the front of the plane.
"Well, that was kind of shocking,” Rhonda says. “Except not that much.”
"Who will be eliminated next time? Will Gwen get SG to send home Julie? Will Taylor become stable? Will Barbie survive any longer?" Chris asks. "Find out next time on Total Drama What The Heck?"
Meanwhile Gwen and SG are walking down the hall.
“Gwen I don’t want to keep having these conversations,” SG whispers. “I…I…I”
“Did you say something?” Gwen asks.
“N…no, nothing,” SG replies.
Gwen stops at the corner of a hallway intersection. "Just look," she says.
SG turns the corner to see Julie and Noah hugging.
"Your super awesome Julie." Noah says.
"You too!” Julie replies, hugging Noah.
SG looks back at Gwen. "What happened?"
"Julie came here to see Noah," Gwen lies. "She was flirting with him, just like she was you. She is just like Alejandro and Heather. She is only using you as a tool."
SG sighs. "I…no…I mean she…I can’t believe she would do that."
"Come on let's go," Gwen says as she takes SG’s arms and leaves. “Let’s go get some ice cream, it might make you feel better.”
While they leave Noah and Julie stop hugging. "I'm glad you want to be buddies Noah," Julie says. “And I appreciate wanting to meet me here to apologize for being snakry; which is fine that is classic Noah.”
"Yeah just don't tell the others,” Noah says. “I wouldn't them to get jealous."
"Uh…okay,” Julie replies. “I guess I understand that; there is someone I don’t want getting the wrong idea.
“Why?” Noah asks.
Julie blushes. "Because…my heart belongs to him."
Chapter 5 Julie The Explorer!
It is a bright and clear night, that smells of chocolates and roses. Somewhere in an abandoned science experiment lab, Rhonda stumbles along...
"How did I even get here? Rhonda asks.
"Can I help you?" A strange man in a hamburger costume says.
Rhonda nods. "Yeah, I'm actually really lost...'
"So you're an outsider?" The man interrupts.
"I'm not really sure what that means," Rhonda says.
"Is that an outsider?" A goth girl asks.
"I think so," The man replies.
"You know what we do to outsiders," an asian rocker says.
"Actually I don't," Rhonda says.
"We kill them," a Joker look-alike says.
"Wait, is it Halloween?" Rhonda asks, "Or are you cosplayers or something..."
Suddenly, the man in the hamburger suit...transforms into a giant robot! The asian rocker... transforms into a hideous half man, half bee creature (is there an non-hideous version?). The goth...transforms into a living pool of Jell- er non copyrighted gelatin! And the joker look-alike...pulls out a knife!
"So... it is Halloween?" Rhonda asks.
The monsters get ready to attack but then they're squashed by a forty nine and a half feet tall woman.
"Thanks for saving me!" Rhonda cheers.
The girl growls and picks Rhonda up.
"You're going to eat me?" Rhonda asks. "How cliche."
The girl ignores Rhonda and swallows her whole.
"AHHHHHHHH..." Rhonda screams, as she falls into intestines. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH….Oh I found a penny... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Rhonda lands on the ground but instead of stomach acid, she is on a cruise ship.
"Huh?" Rhonda asks. "How in the world is this…"
But suddenly a honking noise is heard. Rhonda turns around to see a subway driving towards her and runs her over.
"What The Heck!" Rhonda moans as she gets up on her feet as a homeless woman approaches her.
"Do you have any chicken?" the homeless woman asks.
"No," Rhonda replies.
"Today's chickenless youth!" the homeless woman screams, flying away into the sky.
Suddenly a stampede of baby chicks charges forward, each slowly horribly and painfully exploding into delicious smelling chicken... that isn't as much nugget shaped as ball shaped. Chicken balls you could say.
"DAD!" A lion cub screams as the stampede go through. "Dad...no...oh well, time to go run away from my problems and live carefree in a jungle. It's what my dead would have wanted."
As Rhonda stands up she sees she is in a city, holding a sack of money.
"Welcome to Paradise," Rhonda reads on a sign.
Suddenly a large car pulls up.
The window rolled down to reveal that a girl dressed in blue was in the passenger seat and a guy dressed in red was driving.
"Get in Rhonda," the driver says.
"Why should I?" Rhonda asks.
"We've got candy," The driver replies.
"Okay!" Rhonda exclaims happily. "If you can't trust strangers with candy, than who can you trust?"
As Rhonda got in the back seat she sat next to an attractive blonde girl, who was sitting next to a shy purple girl. The driver speeds away quickly.
"We did it!" The blonde screams happily.
"Did what?" Rhonda asks.
"Robbed a bank," The girl in the passenger seat says happily.
"Say what?" Rhonda asks.
Suddenly a large squadron of police cars pulls up behind them.
"Pull over or else!" A teenage cop screams from one of the cars.
"I think not," The driver shouts as he throws a package out the window.
It suddenly explodes creating a vortex of flames, rapidly growing and spreading, consuming all the police cars and setting half of Paradise in all consuming blaze.
And Paradise and all it's citizens went up in flames...
Rhonda gasps. "Oh my god... I lost the lucky penny I found."
Suddenly a plane flies up above them.
"You can't get rid of me that easily," The teenage cop says, as she jumps out and transforms into a giant eagle that destroys the plane.
"Why did she even bring the plane?" Rhonda asks.
The giant eagle picks the car up but accidentally knocks Rhonda out of the car.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH again!" Rhonda screams.
Rhonda and the money fall down a sewer hole. Then a piano falls on Rhonda, because why not. Rhonda falls right through the streets and lands on a stage surrounded by people.
"Where am I?" Rhonda asks. "I love Nebraska Shore!" A girl wearing a Snooki wig screams in a nasally voice.
"That didn't answer my question," Rhonda replies.
"Your popularity just dropped," A girl in a cool scarf says.
"I'm not even going to question what is going on," Rhonda says getting up.
Then a car drives through the wall and knocks Rhonda back on the floor.
A guy with green hair exits the car singing, "Gotta get pants! Go get your pants! Button, fly!"
A woozy girl and a guy wearing a horrific girl's costume consisting of a black wig, a tank top, glittery pants, and a hairy, fake pimple comes out of the car.
"Wow that's not niiiice, maaaaaan," The woozy girl says.
"But it was funny," The guy dressed as a girl says.
"Yeah it was," A tall crazy girl standing next to a lazy guy said.
Then a short guy pops out of nowhere dressed like….
Julie . o-O
"Look I'm Julie!" He cries.
"That's not funny," Rhonda says. "I think it's hilarious," Julie says
"Julie?" Rhonda says. "What are you doing here."
Julie cackles malevolently. "I'M HERE FOR YOUR SOUL! MY MASTER DEMANDS YOUR SOUL, AND LIKE ALL SOULS HE SHALL HAVE IT! FOR WE ALL OUR NOTHING BUT FOOTNOTES IN THE GRAND COSMIC SCALE OF THE UNIVERSE. POINTLESS, MEANINGLESS CREATURES WITH NO POINT OF EXISTENCE! ...Now let's have a dance party!"
Everyone except Rhonda cheers.
"PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME! PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME!"
An annoying guy in a banana suit sings.
Julie hits him over the head with a shovel.
"We'll bury the body later," Julie states seriously.
Everyone except Rhonda cheers.
"(Yeah, Ah-Ah-Ah-Ah-Ah-Ark)," The guy dressed like a girl sings. "Oo-ooh-ooh, hoo yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah-ah-ah. Yeah-ah-ah. Yeah-ah-ah. Yeah-ah-ah. Yeah, yeah, yeah." "
It's Friday!" Julie sings. "Unless you're reading this on a different day."
"7am, waking up in the morning. Gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs. Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal," The guy dressed as a girl sings. "
Cause this is my moment," Julie sings. "
Stop," The short guy . "HAMMER TIME!" "
U can't touch this!" Julie sings. "I told you homeboy, you can't touch this. Yeah, that's how we livin' while I still let you live. And you know, you can't touch this!"
"It's Julie," the crowd sings. "Go Julie, M.C. Julie. Word!"
"YO VIP. Let's kick it," Julie sings. "Ice Ice Baby! Ice Ice Baby! All right stop collaborate and listen. Julie is back with my brand new invention. Something grabs a hold of me tightly."
"Sorry," The boy dressed like a girl says letting go of Julie.
"yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah. Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah," The girl with the cool scarf says.
"I think I did it again," Julie sings. "I made you believe we're more than just friends. Oh baby, It might seem like I'm crushing you. But it doesn't mean that I'm serious. 'Cause I lost all my senses. And this is just typical me." "
Oh baby, baby," The tall crazy girl sings.
"Oops!…I did it again," Julie sings. "I played with your heart, got lost in the game oh Puddin, baby. Oops!...You think I'm in love. That I'm sent from above. I'm not that innocent." "
I just want this to all make sense!" Rhonda cries out. "Is that too much to ask?"
A stage light drops on Rhonda's head before electrocuting her.
Suddenly, a ravioli pixie runs on stage chasing Duncan.
"I love you Duncan!" The pixie screams.
Then SG shows up dressed like an astronaut with a moon pizza...from the moon!
"Julie, before you go, there's something I want you to have," he says giving Julie the necklace from the Titanic.
"Oh, it's beautiful, but wait a minute, isn't this...?" Julie asks.
"Yeah, yes it is," SG replies.
"But I thought the old lady dropped it into the ocean in the end?" Julie asks.
"Well baby, I went down and got it for you," SG says.
"Oh, you shouldn't have," Julie says.
"Now what?" SG asks. "Your not gonna walk away are you?"
"Heck no," Julie replies. "I'm not a troll."
"So what are we going to do now?" SG asks.
"We're gonna make out," Julie says.
Then they start making out. While they make out everyone dances awkwardly except Rhonda who is just standing there, feeling awkward.
Then, a man wearing a name tag saying "Wiki Elder" walks up to Rhonda and punches her.
Then everyone and everything explodes… o-O
We run out of money in the budgets for explosions, so here's some stock footage.
Rhonda screams as she wakes up in the front of the plane… with a mustache drawn on her face. She looks around and sees Jenny and Toby fighting in the other seat, reaching for the radio.
"Stop it Toby," Jenny says. "I wanna listen to Oops I Did It Again."
"Well I wanted to listen to Ice Ice Baby and Can't Touch This but you wouldn't let me," Toby replies. "And turn down the heat!"
"Well at least it isn't that Rebecca Black," Jenny says.
"What are you two doing?" Rhonda asks.
"You fell asleep and Bobo is on his break so Chris told us to fly the plane," Jenny replies. "You okay?"
"Yeah I just had the weirdest dream," Rhonda replies. "It was horrifying."
"We could tell," Toby says. "You were screaming. Why do you think we turned on the radio?"
"And you didn't wanna do anything about," Rhonda yells. "What if I scared myself to death?"
"Then we get your job!" Jenny replies happily. "I hate you guys," Rhonda says.
"Whatever," Toby replies. "You know, they say dreams are a window into your inner psyche and soul. What did your dream say about you?"
Rhonda thinks quizzically. "It says...I need to get out more."
"I could have told you that," Jenny states. "Also, Chris says to do the recap when you wake up."
"All right," Rhonda replies. "Just let me remember what happened. My mind is still shattered after that crazy dream."
"What is there to remember?" Toby asks. "The Fun Bunch were depressed they lost, so naturally they won the challenge, which was in Egypt. "
"Yeah," Jenny says. "And Jovi lost her cool with Taylor's crying, which was slowly them down. And surprisingly, Taylor started moving past her bad breakup thanks to the kind words of Trent. Jovi herself apologized for her actions, though her team lost and voted off Justin for being pointless! While Gwen and Noah hatched a plan to defeat Julie." "Well thanks for doing the recap for me," Rhonda says sarcastically.
"You're welcome!" Jenny replies.
"Why even do a recap?" Toby asks. "I mean why are you watching this episode and you haven't seen the last? Just read a summery of it on a Wiki or something."
"I don't know," Rhonda replies. "Lets just start the theme song."
(Theme song plays)
The scene shows The Fun Bunch at the pool enjoying themselves.
"Say Julie," Mikey asks. "Water you doing?"
Julie giggles. "I'm having a great time.
"You're really enjoying yourself aren't you?" Nellie asks, sitting in a floatie chair like a dead fish.
"Of course!" Julie replies. "I've always loved water. I just feel so alive and free in here."
"I feel nothing but unhappiness," Nellie says.
"Maybe one of my jokes could cheer you up," Mikey suggests. "What do the clownfish say when asked why he lives in an anemone?"
"For protection from predators," Nellie states.
"No," Mikey replies. "He said, 'Keep your friends close, and your anemones closer!'"
Sierra bursts out laughing. "You're hysterical Mikey!"
Mikey blushes, while Gwen looks on...an evil smirk coming to her face.
SG is wading alone in the water, and sighs climbing out of the pool.
"Hey Puddin wanna play Marco Polo with us?" Julie asks SG.
SG walks away, leaving the pool.
"Sierra... I think SG hates me," Julie says.
"No he doesn't," Sierra replies. "He probably just had to go the bathroom and didn't hear you."
"How can't he?" Julie asks. "I'm so loud!"
"Your loud voice would destroy the serenity of the peace and quiet," Nellie says sighing. "If there was any peace with all the hatred, war and abuse going on."
Julie flips Nellie and the inflatable over.
"I don't know. I feel like he has been avoiding me since elimination," Julie says. "He doesn't even want to borrow my computer anymore."
"That's because we have computers in first class," Sierra states.
"If you want I could talk to him dude to dude tomorrow," Mikey says.
"Would you?" Julie asks.
"Of course." Mikey says. "Were the Fun Bunch after all. And were gonna stick together! And I'm not going to let anything change that!"
Gwen is shown in the confessional. "Even though SG is on my side The Fun Bunch still out numbers us by one. And they're tight. But I think I've found a way to get my other vote."
Meanwhile, Team Adamantine is hanging out in the cafeteria. Bridgette and Geoff are making out in the corner as usual, when Trent walks by (carrying a journal) but stops and looks uncomfortably at the couple.
“Uh, Geoff?” Trent asks.
Geoff and Bridgette separate from a second. “Sup, man?”
“Did you forget something?” Trent asks.
“You know I keep feeling like I’m forgetting things,” Geoff admits.
“You thought you forget something happening back home, right?” Bridgette recalls.
“Yeah…maybe it was a party or something,” Geoff states. “But hey, if it’s back home it can’t get to me now. Besides, if it was so important I’d remember it.”
“I’d beg to differ,” Tent states.
But the two lovers don’t notice, continuing to make out. Neither seems to notice Geoff forget to put on pants today.
Trent walks over and sits beside Taylor, reading a journal. “Hi Taylor.”
Taylor looks up and smiles. “Oh hi Trent.”
Taylor is shown in the confessional. “Trent has been really nice to me for these past days, he’s a really great friend. And apparently we have a lot in common: we both write our own songs and play the guitar. We decided to swap journals with each other and read the other’s songs. He’s really talented.”
Taylor returns Trent’s journal to him. “Thanks for doing this Trent, I’d love to get feedback from a professional musician.”
“I’m not a professional,” Trent replies. “I’m still having trouble finding a record company to support my first album.”
“Well you write like one,” Taylor replies. “Your lyrics really have a nice rhythm. And they’re so raw and emotional, so honest; I couldn’t ever write something like that.”
Trent blushes. “Thanks. I do feel that something good came from my breakup; I feel like it made me strive to be a better musician. I don’t want to be just another one-hit wonder or ‘white guy with an acoustic guitar’. I want to create my own style that leaves a mark, you know?”
Taylor nods.
Jovi, Rosamond and Courtney look on.
“It’s official; I ship them,” Jovi states.
Rosamond’s biggest cat purrs in agreement.
“I’m just glad our team is moved on from that,” Courtney states. “And that Taylor won’t hinder us anymore.”
“I admit I contributed to our loss,” Jovi states. “But that loss has caused us to grow stronger, and I’m positive we can move on from this blunder. Still, I was hoping we’d never loss a challenge.”
“You didn’t honestly think we’d never lose one challenge did you?” Courtney asks.
“I had hoped we hadn’t and tried to ensure that,” Jovi replies. “I know that isn’t realistic, but it isn’t impossible. It has happened on other reality shows after all.”
“Chris would probably work behind the scenes to cause our team to lose if we did have that luck,” Courtney says. “And it would be luck if that happened.”
“Well we can agree to disagree,” Jovi replies.
“Let’s change the subject,” Rosamond interrupts.
“That reminds me,” Courtney says. “I had a question for you Rosamond. You said Bradley gave you a ‘sinister vibe’ last challenge. What is that suppose to mean?”
“I can sense evil in him,” Rosamond states.
“Sense?” Jovi asks. “Like seeing his aurora or something?”
Rosamond shakes her head. “I can’t do that, though I’d love to learn someday. It’s more…a sixth sense, like some animals have.”
“No offense Rosamond,” Courtney states. “But that’s completely ridiculous. I’d rather believe in aliens or Bigfoot before I believe in magic.”
“Didn’t you go to Area 51 last season,” Jovi asks. “Plus a Sasquatch shows up every at least once every season.”
“That’s obviously just Chris trying to get ratings by having ‘aliens’ and ‘Bigfoot’,” Courtney replies. “As well as a good excuse for Chris to mess with us. I mean he had a whole movie studio; he could make all that. And even if aliens and sasquatches were real, which they aren’t, they could at least be explained scientifically unlike magic.”
“I’m not saying it’s magic,” Rosamond admits absent-mindedly. “Perhaps it’s an ability we’ve lost over the years, or an area from the brain we don’t know how to use. Although, my father use to claim he was a ‘Magic Man’.”
“Your father was magic?” Jovi asks.
Rosamond blushes, and sat up. “Yeah, he use to tour the world providing magical services…”
“You’ve never mentioned him,” Jovi recalls.
“Yeah,” Rosamond says. “Anyway, I do get an evil sense from Bradley; it’s as if his team reeks in the scent of it. It’s rather depressing actually; it’s an evil born from the loss of innocence and hope and an increase of hate and despair. But I suppose that’s where most evil originates in the world.”
“Wow,” Jovi states quietly. “Do you do detect anything else in them?”
“The only thing more present than evil on that team is passion,” Rosamond says. “Everyone on that team posses some to a certain degree.”
“But isn’t passion usually a good thing?” Jovi asks.
“Like all things it’s good in moderation,” Rosamond replies. “Particularly when I sense it on someone. Like they say, love and hate are two sides of the same coin; passion. And both can result in rather troublesome things. Perhaps the world is hinting at this with their team color; red is the color of passion.”
“But your sweater is red,” Courtney points out. “Are you passionate?”
Rosamond looks down at her sleeve, and then smirks. “Well, I do love you two passionately!”
Rosamond pounces and lands on Jovi and Courtney, knocking them to the floor. Rosamond purrs as Jovi giggles and Courtney tries her best to pout and hide her smile.
Meanwhile, The Bulldogs sit in the Loser Class section. Duncan is craving a skull into the benches while DJ and Cosmic River sit next to him chatting.
Barbie sits alone in the corner eating a chocolate bar.
Bradley is sitting off in the corner, observing the others. Heather walks in, scowling as she passes Barbie and sits beside Bradley.
"So where are the cronies?" Heather asks.
Bradley shrugs. "Lindsay required Chef's help for some kind of surprise or something."
"Good," Heather replies. "I wanted to talk you alone."
"You wanted me all to yourself," Bradley teases. "I'm flattered."
Heather rolls her eyes. "Please, I prefer my men to have a little charm-"
"-And speak spanish?" Bradley interrupts.
Heather grabs Bradley by the collar. "Hardly. Let me cut to the chase; You maybe team captain, but I'm no one's follower. If you want an alliance with me, then I'm an equal. Got it?"
Bradley nods. "Of course; I want an alliance with you. I've seen this show, and I know that if there's one smart player it's you."
"Your nose is a little brown," Heather remarks. "Even then though, you're right. I am a smart player, and you're lucky to work with me. I admit you're a smart player, for a rookie. But I'm just...more smart than you. So I suggest a partnership; we lead this alliance than conquer the game.
Heather gets close in Bradley's face, and gives a soft smile. "And than we'll make the final two together; how does that sound?"
Bradley blushes. "Like I said, I want an alliance with you. It sounds like a plan."
Heather laughs. "You're blushing, how cute. Not so big and tough are you?"
Bradley pouts and pushes Heather back, before regaining his composure. "I'll make this clear right now; I'm not Alejandro. I'm not going to give away the money just for some girl; my hormones don't make my decisions. And furthermore, I'm willing to make a final two deal with you. But if you're such a smart player than you know no one trusts you. I'm really your only ally, and you're far from my only ally. It'd be a good idea not to push me."
Chef and Lindsay walk up, Lindsay holding her hands behind her back.
"What's going on?" Lindsay asks, glaring at Heather.
"Talking about who to vote out," Bradley replies. "Where were you? I missed you."
"Thanks," Chef replies.
"I meant Lindsay," Bradley states.
Lindsay smiles and pulls out from behind her back...a chocolate cake. "Surprise! I'm just so happy we haven't had to vote off anyone and I wanted to celebrate! And it's because you're such a great leader we haven't lost, so I made you a cake!"
"She asked for my help," Chef adds. "Wanted to make it right, not mix up the sugar or the salt or anything like that."
Bradley blushes. "Wow, Lindsay you didn't have to do all this for me. Thanks...it's really sweet. It's chocolate? That's actually my favorite."
"I know," Lindsay replies. "I remember you telling me. And don't worry about it; you deserve it."
Lindsay is shown in the confessional. "At first I was hesitant about joining this alliance, but it's worked out pretty well so far! Chef has started being nicer...I wish I could say the same for Heather. But I'm not worried about her; Bradley says we're only keeping her till we don't need her, than she'll get her karma! Bradley is so sweet to me; he even promised me we'd go to the final two together! Isn't he so trustworthy and nice?"
Heather is shown in the confessional. "Ugh, speaking of chocolate, did you see how much Barbie ate? I swear she ate at least three chocolate bars. Anyway, I suppose Bradley has a point; I may need him. But it's clear he wants me...not like that, well I mean he probably wants me, but I mean he wants to be my ally.
He knows I have a bad reputation, so he either wants an ally who isn't afraid to play dirty, or he's planning on using me as a scapegoat in the finals. But what he doesn't realize is that everyone will support me because I'm an original; he'll just be another Alejandro."
Bradley is shown in the confessional, eating his chocolate cake. "Heather's only a pawn; she's desperate and I'm taking advantage of it until I don't need her. I'll work with her, gain her trust, learn all her secrets for this game...then backstab her. Even if we make it to the final two, I have the better reputation and she'll be seen as nothing more than a... follower. Fitting, I know.
I mean who does she think she is, getting any my face. Like I don't know how to act around pretty girls. I don't have a problem flirting with girls; why would you think that? It's not like I don't know how to act around girls who flirt with me...cause I do! Anyway, Lindsay is just a pawn; I need her for the majority votes right now...still, she didn't have to be so sweet..."
"Attention contestants!" Chris suddenly says over the P.A. "We're about to land!"
"Great," Heather mumbles. "Can't wait to see where we are now."
El Explorador de Julie!
The scene then changes to the contestants all out of the plane looking around a canyon.
"Welcome contestants," Chris says, "to Copper Canyon in Mexico! For today's challenge you'll start by proving your Spanish in a ten question Spanish quiz! Then you'll have to race to Basaseachic Falls, the second highest waterfall in Mexico!"
"Why not the highest?" Bridgette asks.
Chris shrugs. "Now for the first part of the challenge, one contestant from each team will go into booths over there, and have twelve minutes to finish a spanish quiz. After twelve minutes, Rhonda will collect your papers whether you're done or not. The winners get a head start in the race while the losing team goes later. First to cross the finish line win. Last loses. Now, team captains pick who will do the Spanish speaking challenge!"
The teams start discussing who will participate. "Who can speak Spanish?" Bradley asks.
"Hablo español mal," Chef says. "I went to Mexico a few times...for reasons, before I worked on Total Drama."
Meanwhile, Team Adamantine is discussing who will participate.
"So who knows Spanish?" Courtney asks.
"I thought Chris said team captains pick who will participate," Jovi reminds. "And anyway I know spanish. I took it for a few years in school. Does anyone else know it?"
No one says anything.
"I'll be happy to do it," Jovi states.
The Fun Bunch aren't having any luck choosing who will represent them, as Julie dances off in the background.
"Noah, didn't you say you speak a lot of languages?" Gwen asks.
"Not Spanish," Noah says.
"If I were not a little mad and generally silly willy," Julie sings.
"Yes you do," Sierra says. "I remember digging through your trash and finding a Spanish test you took. You got an A!"
"That was an old test from awhile ago," Noah says. "Besides, I'm not going to risk going home for this challenge...especially not for some of you."
"I would give me opinion on the subject willy nilly," Julie continues.
"Sierra, your name is Spanish," Noah says. "Why don't you do it?"
"I don't know Spanish!" Sierra replies. "And half of my family heritage is German."
"You know what they say about German sausage," Mikey jokes. "It's the wurst."
"I should show you in a moment how to grapple with the question," Julie sings. "And you’ll really be astonished at the force of my suggestion."
"I'm confused," SG admits. "Why are we even doing on a challenge about this? It seems kind of random."
"Well what does the great team captain say?" Noah asks.
On the subject I shall write you a most valuable letter," Julie sings. "Full of excellent suggestions when I feel a little better, but at present I’m afraid I am as mad as any hatter; So I’ll keep ‘em to myself, for my opinion doesn’t matter!"
"For once I agree with her," Noah mumbles.
"I'm going to," Julie says.
"You are?" Noah asks.
"Of course!" Julie says. "I tried to tell you earlier I speak Spanish, you las vaquillas."
The three made their way to the booths.
Twelve minutes later, Rhonda says, "Test is over! Hand me your results!"
Julie and Jovi stick their tests out.
"Thank you," Rhonda says smiling and collecting the tests. "Chef, where is your test?"
"I'm almost done," Chef says.
"You're not allowed to have extra time," Rhonda says. "Now hand the test over."
Rhonda climbs into the booth and tries to collect the paper.
Rhonda is then thrown out of the booth. "Don't try that again, you frumpy maggot, who can hardly be called my replacement!"
"I can get violent too," Rhonda states, before lunging into the booth like a panther going for the kill...only to be thrown out a few seconds later, like a feeble kitten peeing itself.
Rhonda growls and pulls out a sparkly purple taser. "Like I said, I can get vio-"
"Finished!" Chef shouts as he slams open the door, knocking Rhonda over and causing her to taser herself.
Chris smiles as Chef passes him his test.
"Let's see how you did," Chris says. "For the test, you had to define the word given. The first word was…'rojo'. And you all put 'red', which is correct!
Now for Question Two, the word was… 'vaca'. Chef said 'beef', Jovi said 'cow' and Julie said 'Nellie'. The correct answer is… 'cow'! Which means Jovi was right."
"Actually I think I was still right," Julie says.
Chris ignores Julie and proceeds. "For Question Three, the word was… 'enojado'. Jovi and Julie put 'angry' while Chef put 'happy'. And it was 'angry'. Question Four was… 'morado'. Jovi and Julie put 'purple' and Chef put 'blue'. The answer was 'purple.'
"I thought you said you spoke Spanish?" Heather asks.
"A lot happened in Mexico okay!" Chef shouts back.
"Question Five was…'jirafa'. Chef said 'sad', Jovi said 'horse' and Julie said 'giraffe'. And the correct answer was… 'giraffe'! Question Six is… 'bastante'. Chef said 'cold' and Jovi and Julie said 'pretty'. And Chef was wrong again.
Rhonda slowly gets up off the ground, recovering from the taser. She walks up to Chris.
"Can you believe how dumb Chef is Rhonda?" Chris asks, throwing his hands back, knocking Rhonda over again and causing her to taser herself again. "Huh...guess you can."
"I'm okay," Rhonda whimpers.
"Anyway," Chris says. "Question Seven was… 'muerto'. Chef and Julie said 'dead' while Jovi said 'death'. The answer was…dead. Question Eight was… 'Amor'. And all three of you put 'love', which was the answer.
Question Nine was… 'luna'. And all of you said 'moon', which was correct. And the final question was… 'cobre'. Chef put 'cobra' and Julie and Jovi put 'copper'. And the answer was… 'copper'.
Which means Julie missed one, Jovi missed two and Chef missed six. All right, Julie's team, you get a five minute head start while The Bulldogs will start five minutes after Team Adamantine. Just follow the signs the interns have set up. But be warned, there is a fork in the road. Both paths have their own obstacles but both end up at Basaseachic Falls, though one path is secretly shorter than the other. Remember, you have to arrive with all your teammates. Now, go!"
The Fun Bunch run off down the path.
"So where did you learn Spanish?" Mikey asks Julie.
"Oh I know tons of languages," Julie states. "English, Spanish, Chinese, Russian, Napeli, American, Leet Speak, Parrot, and Google Translate!"
"What's your first language?" SG asks.
"Why that's the language of love Puddin," Julie replies winking.
SG sighs. Julie looks on worriedly.
"Por favor, no me odian como los demás tienen..." Julie whispers to herself.
A little later, the other teams are waiting at the finish line.
"Team Adamantine," Chris says. "Go!"
Team Adamantine rushes off without a moment's notice.
"Come on guys, we need to hurry," Jovi says.
Courtney kicks a rock towards Jovi, tripping her.
"Come hustle people we need to move!" Courtney barks passing Jovi and taking the lead position.
Courtney gives a smirk to Jovi, who smiles back before glaring as Courtney leaves.
Later, the Bulldogs are waiting to go. "Go." Chris says unenthusiastically as the Bulldogs rush off.
"We'll never catch up now," Heather complains. "Thanks a lot, Chef."
"Shut up and run, scary girl!" Chef yells.
"Speaking of running," Heather says to Barbie, who is in the back of the line, "You wanna try to use your fat legs? We wouldn't want you to cost us the challenge because you can't eat properly."
Barbie doesn't say anything.
Meanwhile, The Fun Bunch have come across the fork in the road; the right path is flatter while the left looks more bumpy and rocky.
"Which way do we go, Captain?" Sierra asks.
"Hm," Julie says. "Eeny, Meeny, Miny, Moe!" Julie points to the right. "All right lets go right!"
"Isn't one path secretly being shorter leaving this whole challenge up to fate?" SG questions.
"Any better ideas?" Noah asks.
"Fair enough," SG replies.
The Fun Bunch run down the right path.
Later, Team Adamantine come across the fork.
"I say we go right," Courtney says. "It seems to have easier terrain."
"Ah, good idea Courtney," Jovi says. "But I'm team captain and I say we go left. It may look rougher, but that's probably to counteract that's it shorter."
"Why don't we vote?" Courtney asks. "All in favor of going left, raise their hands."
Jovi raises her hand. Rosamond does too. Taylor raises her hand after a bit of hesitation, with Trent following her lead.
Courtney sighs. "Fine...let's go."
Team Adamantine rushes down the left path.
Meanwhile, The team with the long name are running down the right path.
"Well, this is nice," Noah says sarcastically.
"I know, it's such a nice day out!" Mikey says. "It's sunny, but there is a nice, gentle breeze blowing."
"I agree," Sierra says. "Nothing could ruin this day."
Suddenly, a puma jumps our of nowhere and growls. Julie is so surprised she squeezes SG for comfort. This accidentally knocks SG over, causing both of them to fall into the canyon.
The puma approaches the others, licking his lips. Most back away, but Nellie doesn't move, staring at the beast. "Go ahead and eat me," Nellie says depressingly. "It is better than dealing with the harsh cruelty of the world. Between all the war and disease, you barley have time to consider all the people who bully and taunt one another."
The puma stops and cocks his head at Nellie.
Nellie sighs. "This world is horrible and unfair, filled with people unfairly born with deformities and unintelligent animals that murder one another only to be murdered by our environment destruction. Then we die of lung diseases from the pollution and lack of oxygen we created. Then our bodies will degrade into dirt to grow more plants if it isn't too late for them already. If you're lucky, puma, a poacher will catch you and turn you into a fur carpet. Or maybe they'll sell you as a pet and you'll live caged and abused every day, alone, till you die. Maybe you'll even catch diseases that harm our pets today, like Feline AIDS. So eat me and look forward to your life. Who knows? Maybe I'll cause you indigestion."
The puma, creeped out, runs away. The Fun Bunch cheer while Nellie sighs. "Life sucks. A lot."
"Guys." SG yells.
The Fun Bunch look over the edge of the canyon to see SG and Julie have landed in a tree on a different path, many feet under them.
"SG! Julie!" Sierra yells.
"Sierra!" Julie yells. "Hi!"
"Hi," Sierra yells. "Julie!"
"Hi," Julie yells. "Sierra!"
"Stop that!" Noah yells.
"Noah!" Julie yells. "Hi!"
"Hi," Sierra yells. "Noah!"
"Are you guys okay?" SG calls.
"Yeah, Nellie scared the puma away be being herself," Mikey yells.
"That figures," Julie says. "We can't find a way back up there, so we'll continue down this path. You keep going down that one and eventually we'll meet up. Got it?"
"Got it," The Fun Bunch reply.
"All right, let's go!" Julie yells. The rest of the Fun Bunch head on while Julie and SG climb out of the tree.
"Well, this is unfortunate," SG says.
"Why?" Julie asks. "Now we're alone, just the two of us. It's kind of romantic and…"
"Hi!" a mexican girl with backpack says. "I'm Dora and this is my pal Boots!" Dora points to a monkey wearing red boots. The monkey waves but does not talk.
"Hey," SG says confused. "How long have you been standing there?"
"Awhile," Dora says. "Do you need help getting somewhere?"
"Well, we're trying to get to Basaseachic Falls," SG explains. "Why are you alone with no one watching you? I mean there are pumas here."
"We know how to get to Basaseachic Falls," Dora says. "We can take you there using our map! Come on."
SG and Julie look at each other and shrug. They follow Dora and Boots into the forest off to Basaseachic Falls.
Later The Bulldogs come to the fork in the road.
"Which way do we go, man?" Cosmic River asks.
"We go left," Bradley says. "I see footprints heading down left. If we hurry, we might pass the other team."
The Bulldogs shrug and head down the left path.
Meanwhile, The Fun Bunch are still heading down the path.
"Well, it's still a nice day," Mikey says.
"Yeah," Sierra says. "I'm sure nothing could ruin it now. "
Suddenly, the ground Sierra splits open underneath her and she almost falls in, but luckily Mikey grabs her arm and pulls her up.
"We should really quit saying nothing bad will happen to ruin this day." Mikey says.
Sierra enthusiastically hugs Mikey. "You saved my life!" Sierra yells. "Thank you!"
Mikey blushes and says, "No problem. I was happy to."
"I refuse to let this ruin my day!" Sierra states. "You hear that world! It's still nice and I'm sure nothing could ruin it! You hear-"
Sierra is interrupted by a bird's poop landing down her throat.
"Aw geez," Mikey says, patting Sierra's back as she upchucks. "I hope SG and Julie are having a better time than us."
Meanwhile…
"Where are we going?" Dora sings.
"For the last time were going to Basaseachic Falls!" Julie screams.
"Where are we going?" Dora sings twirling with Boots.
Julie looks at SG, who is sighing and avoiding eye contact with her.
"SG, what did I do?" Julie asks.
"What?" SG asks.
"Don't play dumb with me, Puddin," Julie says. "You have been uncomfortable since we went to France. And you've been flat out ignoring me since after Egypt. And I'm pretty sure I know why."
"But--" SG tries to say.
"I know you think my hair is crazy and you think I'm weird looking," Julie says.
"What?" SG asks.
"But I like how I look on the outside," Julie says. "I feel like I'm pretty...even if I'm not. I don't want to feel ashamed.
"Who says I don't like the way you look?" SG asks. "I like how you look; it makes you stand out."
"Oh," Julie admits. "Sorry...I just...I've been told before I look ugly or unnatural."
"Why would you think I thought that?" SG asks.
"I don't know," Julie admits. "Because...most guys tend to. I mean they don't say that at first, but then later when we're closer they say that. Sometimes they say I'm evil...you don't think I'm evil do you?"
"What? No…" SG lies. "Why would you think that?"
"Well, I can be mischievous, violent and well...crazy," Julie admits. "But I've never actually tried to hurt someone personally. And...I care about you and Sierra and Mikey and Nellie..."
"Wow," SG admits. "I've never really seen this side of you."
"Yeah," Julie says. "I don't like to show it; show I'm vulnerable. I don't like to think of myself as vulnerable...it makes me lack confidence, and you always need confidence."
"This is going to sound mean," SG states. "But...I never really thought of you having problems."
"I mean my problems aren't a big deal," Julie says. "I just want to be happy, so I try to have fun and make other people laugh. Make them smile. But sometimes I can go to far...have I gone too far? Have I gotten into your personal space too much?"
"No," SG admits. "You've...you've actually been pretty nice to me. I'm sorry I've been a bit distant; I'm still new to opening up to people. I've been feeling a bit sick too."
"Aw, Puddin," Julie says. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to push you; I just want to get to know you. I know what it's like being alone and I just wanted you to feel like you're welcome. But if it's too much, that's okay."
Julie hugs SG. "Are you still feeling sick?"
"No," SG replies. "I feel a lot better.
"Hey SG," Julie says. "I know we haven't known each other for too long, but I have something I want to tell you. I... lo-"
"-Do you see the tree?" Dora asks.
"You mean the one right in front of you?" SG asks.
"Bueno!" Dora says.
"You so ruined the moment Dora," Julie says.
"Do you hear that?" Dora asks.
"What?" Julie asks. "The SGxJulie fans mumbling swear words, or my insane plans on destroying you and everything you hold dear?"
"It's Swiper the fox!" Dora yells.
A fox in gloves and a bandit mask comes out of the bushes. "He is going to try and steal the map. Say, 'Swiper, No Swiping!'"
"Why would we do that?" SG asks. "Let's just ignore him or hit him."
"Swiper, No Swiping!" Dora says. "Say it again."
"But we didn't say it a first time," Julie points out.
"Swiper, No Swiping!" Dora says. But the fox steals the map.
"Oh, no! Swiper has the map!" Dora says.
SG steals the map from Swiper and kicks him away.
"Yay!" Dora cheers. "We did it!"
"What did you do besides get the map stolen?" SG asks.
"Let's go!" Dora says.
"Is it wrong that I want to strangle her?" SG asks.
"I'm thinking the same thing," Julie says, "so it probably is."
"Where are we going?" Dora sings.
"Ugh," SG sighs. "I wonder if anyone else is having as much fun as we are."
Meanwhile, Team Adamantine are continuing through the forest, deciding to all race each other.
“Whoa,” Taylor cheers as she passes Trent. “I wonder if anyone else is having as much fun as we are.”
“I doubt it,” Courtney shouts back, as she and Jovi compete for the lead.
Suddenly, the two trip and fall forward, tilling falling through the ground and landing with a thud.
“What happened?” Jovi asks, as Courtney helps her up.
“Are you guys okay down there?” Taylor calls out. “I think you fell in a sink hole.”
“Isn’t this a national park?” Trent asks. “Shouldn’t they have signs warning people?”
“Something tells me Chris had them moved for the challenge,” Courtney states. “And by something, I mean they’re down here too.”
“We need to act quickly,” Jovi states. “Before we lose a our lead. See if you can find something to pull us out with while Courtney and I try climbing up.”
“I’ve got it!” Taylor replies, pulling a long rope out of her pocket. She quickly lassos it around Jovi’s waist and begins pulling on her.
Trent quickly grabs Taylor’s waist and begins helping her pull. “When did you learn to do that?”
“Rodeo,” Taylor replies. “I used to compete in one in Nashville. Joe, my old boyfriend, didn’t like me doing it so much, so I stopped.”
“Can’t imagine why,” Trent states. “I think it’d be amazing to date a girl who could do that.”
Taylor blushes slightly, turning around to look at him and lets go of the rope.
“You…you think so?” the cowgirl asks.
Trent blushes as well. “Yeah, it’s really cool…”
“Ow!”
“Oh no,” Taylor says turning around. “Sorry Jovi.
“It’s okay,” Jovi replies. “Courtney broke my fall!”
“And she broke me,” Courtney complains. “Can we focus back on the challenge now?”
“Yeah,” Taylor replies. “Sorry.”
“Here, will give you a hand,” Rosamond states as she, Bridgette and Geoff line up.
Taylor is shown in the confessional. “Together we got Courtney and Jovi out in one go. But the whole event left me…confused. I still feel so much for Joe and miss him like crazy. His touch, the sound of his voice…but I’m mad at him too. And after what Trent said…I don’t know. I don’t want to jump at the first nice new guy I see after my break up, but…I maybe developing feelings for Trent…Why do I have to have such stupid feelings?"
At about the same time, The Bulldogs are continuing on at a fast pace. Heather marches at the front, before stopping and turning around to glare at the others. Barbie meanwhile was in the back, walking at a slow pace.
“Hey lard,” Heather shouts. “What has to be done to get you to move faster? Am I going to have to dangle a carrot in your face? I get it you’ve got to much junk to go fast, but any speed would be better than that; so either pick up the pace or does us all a favor and get lost in the forest.”
Heather gave one final glance at the stragglers, then turned around and stormed forward. Barbie doesn’t say anything else, but begins taking even smaller and slower steps.
Bradley, Lindsay, Duncan and Chef follow after Heather; Lindsay riding on Bradley’s shoulders and telling stories of a theater camp she worked at before the season, as a celebrity counselor.
Cosmic River and DJ are following behind them, chatting to themselves. Cosmic River stares at some of the passing flowers.
“Hey DJ,” Cosmic River says. “Do you have a girlfriend?”
“Nah,” DJ replies. “I’ve had a few in the past, but I’m currently not dating anyone. Why?”
”Just curious,” the hippie says. “I know you’ve never mentioned any chick. So…you have dated other people. So you have experience?”
“Yeah,” DJ replies.
“Ever dated anybody on the show?” Cosmic River asks.
DJ shakes his head. “I haven’t really fallen for anyone here, and based on how I’ve seen people act I don’t think it’s a good idea to date during the show. What about you?”
Cosmic River blushes. “Nah cat, I don’t have anybody…”
“You’re not lying to me are you?” DJ asks disappointed. “It sounds like you are.”
“Well I mean I like someone back home,” Cosmic River admits. “But I’m not with anyone or anything. And I couldn’t be with them anyhow.”
“Ooh,” DJ gasps. “Who? You got to spill the details man!”
“Well…her name is Rosy Moonbeam,” Cosmic River states. “She’s a hippie too, someone I’ve been traveling with. She’s a pacifist but she has a fighting spirit in her, you dig? She’s passionate and works real hard. She’s smart, and like great at talking with people. She loves butterflies and moths too; I bet one could land right on her finger if she tried. They could sense the groovy love admitting from her, even when she pouts.”
DJ squees a little bit to his friend. “That’s adorable. So what’s the issue?”
“Oh she could never date a bum like me,” Cosmic River replies. “For a lot of reasons. You know I’m not…I’m not originally part of their community. I’m an outsider, and while they accept me…it just wouldn’t be right. And…she’s my old teacher’s father.”
“The one whose name you took?” DJ asks as the hippie nods. “Wow…I can get behind why that’d be weird. But, does she like you?”
“I doubt it,” Cosmic River replies. “Still, just thinking about her makes me happy. And that’s all I need.”
“You know if you need any help with girls I’d be more than happy to help,” DJ says.
Cosmic River smiles and says, “Thanks man. You’re a true, blue friend; you know that?”
“Same to you man,” DJ replies.
“I hope we're friends all our lives,” Cosmic River states simply.
“Amen,” DJ replies.
Much later, SG, Julie and Dora walk out to Basaseachic Falls to find the other teams waiting on them.
"Where were you guys?" Chris asks. "The challenge was over fifteen minutes ago."
"We were following this little girl out," Julie explains. "We couldn't have gotten out here any faster."
"Oh, we could have got out here a lot faster," Dora says.
"What?" Julie asks.
"I decided we could take the fun way here!" Dora says.
"That wasn't fun!" SG yells. "That was torture!"
"Well, while you were making your way here, Team Adamantine arrived first," Chris announces. "The left path was shorter. Your team would've gotten second place, but they didn't have all their members so...you guys get to vote someone off! Team Adamantine, you win First Class, the pool and will be having a Mexican fiesta in your honor!"
Team Adamantine cheers.
"But we were attacked by a puma!" SG explains.
"Don't care." Chris says. "Now let's--"
"What was your favorite part of the adventure?" Dora asks.
...
"Mine, too." Dora says.
"Can we leave?" Julie asks.
"Let's," Rhonda replies.
The teens all walk away, leaving Dora laughing.
"Ha, ha, ha, ha…" Dora laughs. " Ha, ha ha, I've got your scent, SG and Julie. And I will find you... and end your miserable little lives! Ha, ha, ha…"
Later, The Fun Bunch eat their dinner in the cafeteria.
"Well who should we vote off?" Sierra says.
"I'm leaning towards Noah," Mikey states.
"Not Noah," Julie says. "I think we should vote Gwen."
"Why?" Sierra asks.
"Just trust me," Julie says. "Noah's been talking to me, and he's been going through some stuff. He wants a second chance, and I'm willing to give it to him."
"Okay," Sierra says.
SG is shown in the confessional. "Gwen said Julie would try to save Noah, because she believes she's got him under her control, and why would Gwen lie?... But back in the canyon Julie said she would never do anything to hurt me. She really showed she cared, almost like she kinda liked me...No, she couldn't ever really love someone like me...could she? Ugh, I don't know who to trust! All I know is, I don't want to hurt Julie..."
Later The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice were at their elimination ceremony.
"All right, we all know who this works," Chris says. "You vote one another off, Rhonda and I call your names, you get a barf bag, the person who does not receive a barf bug must jump the Drop of Shame and will never return, EVER! Now the first barf bag goes to… SG!"
SG is tossed is barf bag. He catches it. His face shows no sign of which decision he made.
"…Nellie," Chris says as Rhonda tosses her a barf bag.
"…Mikey and Sierra," Chris says.
"….Noah," Chris says.
"Gwen, Julie. The final barf bag goes to…
"Gwen."
"Sorry Julie," Rhonda says. "It was close; three to four votes.
"What?" Julie says. "But how? Who…"
Julie looks over to see Gwen avoiding eye contact with her and Noah smirking.
"You two," Julie says, standing up. "You set me up. Noah, you said you wanted to be my friend...and you used me! YOU USED ME! As for you Gwen...
Julie spits on Gwen. "Last season, Sierra said you were the new Heather, and I'm inclined to agree. Remember in season one how you had morales and didn't walk all over people? ...Yeah, me neither. Now all people remember is how you backstab everyone."
Julie looks at her former Fun Bunch pals. "And how any of you could vote for me, let alone two, is something I can't believe. I admit I can be pesky and tease but...but was I really that bad a friend?
Sierra, you and me instantly became friends and you're probably the first person I got to know here. Nellie, I know I'm not the nicest to you but I consider you and Sierra my sisters. And I know you don't feel anything but sadness but I thought misery loved company...like how I enjoyed your company.
Mikey, when no one wanted to be your partner, me, Sierra and Nellie all let you join us. We fought spider monkeys together! I made sure I picked you for my team because your such a fun guy. And SG, I cared for you so much. I let you join us, I let you use my laptop and I felt close to you. And you really cared for me. And I thought…" Julie stops as her eyes get all watery.
"Oh never mind," Julie cries. "It's not like it matters anymore. Maybe it's easy to forget this, but I am a person, and I do have feelings. I get sad and mad and scared...and hurt; I have before. I just hope whoever did this is happy.
...Because I will be back. And when I find out who betrayed me, I will skin them alive. Then I'll use the rest of their carcass to make a meat dress! Just wait until I come back. You haven't seen the last of Julie Noforthwal. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha…"
And then Julie jumped out of the plane.
"Wait," Rhonda yells. "You forgot your parachute...guess it's too late now..."
"Do you hear that buzzing noise?" Chris asks.
The buzzing noise becomes louder and louder till a flash of light is shown outside. "Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha…" Julie laughed as she was pulled up by an alien tractor beam. Everyone looks outside and sees a giant UFO abduct Julie and fly away…
"Ha, ha, ha," Rhonda laughs. "I get it."
"Get what?" Nellie asks.
"Mikey's joke about the pony with the sore throat," Rhonda explains. "It's funny. I'm a little horse. That's a good one."
"Oh by the way, you had a mustache on your face the entire time Rhonda," Chris states rather quickly.
"Wait...wha-"
Chapter 6 Down Under
Chris and Rhonda are shown in the front of the plane.
"Last time on Total Drama What The Heck," Chris says. "Gwen continued her scheme to use SG to oust Julie, Heather and Bradley formally formed an alliance and Geoff forgot pants.
"Our challenge took us to Copper Canyon in Mexico," Rhonda continues. "After an intense Spanish quiz, our contestants raced through the canyon with pumas, pitfalls and scary little girls. Uh, yeah.”
“Anyway,” Chris interrupts. “Julie had a heart to heart with SG about his strange behavior, but their team ended up losing. Even worse, Gwen successfully voted off Julie with help from Noah, SG and unknown member of The Fun Bunch.
“Ooh!” Rhonda exclaims. “And I got a joke!"
"Good for you Rhonda," Chris says. "Will SG learn the truth? Can Team Adamantine score another win? Will Lindsay wise up and realize she is being manipulated?"
"I doubt it," Rhonda replies.
"You aren’t suppose to answer these questions," Chris says. "Find out these answers and more, on Total Drama What The Heck?"
(Theme song plays)
Julie’s former team sits in the economy section. Noah reads, Nellie is listening to music, Mikey hangs upside down while Sierra looks out the window, all separated from each other. Gwen and SG are nowhere to be seen.
Sierra is shown in the confessional. "Ever since Julie's elimination our team’s fallen apart; we don’t talk, we don’t eat, and Mikey hasn’t even made a pun…When I finally make some friends I lose them. I can’t imagine anyone being happy right now.”
Noah is shown in the confessional. I’m so happy right now! Julie is finally gone. That’s what she gets for trying to replace Izzy. I mean, we all know that’s why the show put her on here. And they don’t even acknowledge her death; don’t dedicate an episode to her. She deserved better…
Nellie is shown in the confessional. “She deserved better than to be voted off. I mean I’m always miserable so this is nothing new but maybe being around everybody made me slightly less miserable. I guess I made everybody else miserable; I could’ve been nicer to Noah and Julie…I doubt things are going to get better.”
Mikey is shown in the confessional. “I doubt things are going to get better. Why are magazines so sad? They have a lot of issues. Like I do. Not medical issues but you know…”
Meanwhile Gwen and Duncan are talking alone in the cafeteria; Gwen’s picking at her food.
“What’s wrong?” Duncan asks. “You should be happy, not being eliminated and all."
Gwen sighs. "Should I? I literally used SG to get myself further; he trusted me and now all his friends are going to gun for him.”
"Better than you," Duncan says. “You can use that anger to make him a target and get yourself further.”
"Do you hear yourself?” Gwen asks. “Doing that would…no, what I’ve already done has made me worse than Heather!
Duncan puts a hand over his heart. “Gwen, don’t say that. You’re way nicer than Heather; you’re a good person and I know it.”
"-How am I a nicer?" Gwen asks. "It’s not even this season… In Action, I broke up with Trent when was he trying to impress me, gave his team he could vote him off and to prove I’m a ‘good person’ I threw a challenge for my team.
Then in World Tour, I fantasized about you, while you were still dating Courtney!”
“We weren’t really-“
“She was under the impression you were,” Gwen states. “You guys were in some kind of relationship, no matter how ‘unofficial’ it was. And when we became friends, I made out with her boyfriend. And I only thought about how it affected me; I didn’t even apologize.”
Gwen starts to shed a tear.
"Courtney is a villain," Duncan says. "Have we forgotten how she acted when she returned in Action?"
"Yeah she wasn’t nice," Gwen explains. "She was bossy and overconfident. But back in the first season, Heather kissed Trent, and I got so upset thinking he was cheating on me. And then I go cheat on someone but on a friend! Courtney was my friend…and she’s still a person with feelings.”
“You’re overacting,” Duncan says. “Just take a second and calm down.”
“And now this season,” Gwen says. “I used SG to get rid of Julie while breaking her heart and ruining all of their friendships.”
“Julie was a psycho,” Duncan adds.
“She was still a person,” Gwen states. “What if someone tried to do that to us?”
"Well, it's a different situation," Duncan says.
"Why," Gwen asks. "Because it's us and not them?"
"You know," Duncan says. "I left Courtney because I thought we had a lot in common and that you were different; you seemed like less high maintenance. But you’re just as high maintenance; you’re emotional want me to change and never think I say the right thing! Heck you’re worse than Courtney.”
“I’m upset!” Gwen shouts back. “And instead of making me feel better you’re trying to avoid the problem! You don’t seem to understand what I did was wrong and you don’t care.
“That’s it!” Duncan shouts. “I’ve had it! We’re through."
Duncan walks away in a huff, leaving Gwen all alone in the cafeteria, where, she starts to cry.
Later Duncan is craving an X through a heart with his and Gwen's name, likely made by him. Bradley notices this and gets up, deciding to talk to Duncan. "Something bugging you dude?" Bradley asks.
"It's nothing," Duncan says.
"Doesn't look like it," Bradley says.
"Listen I DON'T want to talk about it," Duncan says putting his pocket knife in Bradley's face.
"Ok," Bradley says putting hands up in defense. "I just thought since were in alliance you would like to tell me. Maybe I could help you…"
"There is nothing you can help me with," Duncan says. "If you must know Gwen and me broke up."
"Why?" Bradley asks.
"We got into in argument about if Gwen was wrong for how she played the game and if she was like Heather." Duncan says.
"Go on." Bradley says.
Bradley is shown in the confessional, smiling. "Duncan told me everything. And with this information I can use it to turn the Fun Bunch against each other."
The scene changes to Bradley leaving the confessional and Nellie waiting to use it. "Sorry did I keep you waiting?" Bradley asks smiling.
"No." Nellie replies.
"Wait your on the Fun Bunch right?" Bradley asks.
"Yeah, so?" Nellie asks.
"Well," Bradley says. "I have some information you might want to know…"
The scene changes to First Class where Jovi is reading, Courtney is on a laptop and Rosamond is sitting next to her cats that are asleep.
"Uh." Rosamond sighs.
No pays any attention to her.
"UH." Rosamond sighs later.
Courtney and Jovi ignore her.
"UH!" Rosamond sighs as she stands up.
Courtney and Jovi roll their eyes.
Rosamond sits on Jovi and yells, UHHHH!
"What!" Jovi yells.
"You don't need to raise your voice." Rosamond says. "Anyway, I'm bored."
"So, what do you want us to do about it?" Courtney replies.
"I don't know." Rosamond says.
"Well," Jovi says. "Why don't you tell us more about Nate?"
"Why do you care so much?" Rosamond asks.
"Just curious," Jovi says. "How did you two meet?"
"Well," Rosamond says. "Nate was investigating about a missing painting of her dog and I was over earlier so I was a suspect."
"Annie is your friend from your neighborhood right?" Jovi asks. "The one who is recapping how you’re doing on Total Drama for Nate."
"Yup," Rosamond replies. "She is a really nice girl, pretty too. I think Nate thinks she's pretty."
"Does that bother you?" Courtney asks.
"No, of course not." Rosamond says though it's clear she is lying. "Anyway, Me and Nate met and he said he was a detective. I asked him to prove it and I asked him to find Wednesday who was missing but he said he couldn't because he was on a case. They came inside and I introduced him to my cats. BeetleJuice sat on his lap and he clearly was uncomfortable. It was funny. He decided to leave to continue the investigation and he found Wednesday who was under the chair he was sitting on. I found out years later he accidentally stepped on her tail. But at the time I thought he really found her and I was thrilled. After that Nate and me became good friends. We were on the same baseball team, go to school together and eat pancakes together sometimes. And were still good friends."
"Aw," Courtney says. "That is so sweet!"
"Well, it… wait what?" Rosamond asks. "Did you say it was sweet?"
"Yeah…" Courtney says. "Pancakes sound really sweet. I'm really hungry."
"Ok," Rosamond says. "I'm going to go for a walk. Watch my cats please."
"Sure thing." Jovi replies.
Rosamond walks away. Jovi opens her book again and Courtney gets back on the laptop. "Smooth Courtney." Jovi says when Jovi is sure Rosamond is gone.
"You couldn't have done better." Courtney replies.
Meanwhile Rosamond is walking around the plane and enters the Elimination Room and sees SG sitting on the bleachers alone. "SG," Rosamond says. "Why are you in here?"
"Why are you here?" SG asks.
"I'm talking a walk." Rosamond explains. "So why are you here alone?"
SG sighs.
"You miss Julie huh?" Rosamond asks. "Any idea who voted for her?"
SG sighs.
"Oh my god you voted Julie off!!!" Rosamond screams.
"Wait, how did you know?” SG asks.
"You really did?" Rosamond yells. "I just said that to see of you did. I thought you would say you didn't because I never would believe you would. But you did! Why?"
"It's a long story." SG says.
"I've got time." Rosamond says sitting next to SG.
SG sighs. "Well, it started in the cooking challenge. Gwen brought me outside and she said she heard Julie in the confessional saying she was manipulating the others and me. Gwen said that Julie was pretending to be a crazy girl. I didn't believe her but she asked me to ask Julie where she came from and Julie would make up a crazy story or avoid the subject. I did and Julie did exactly what Gwen said. I didn't want to believe her but Julie proved her right and Gwen isn't the kind of person to lie. Then after Egypt, Gwen showed me Julie hugging Noah and Gwen said she had seduced him like she had with me. I started avoiding her. When Julie and I got separated in Mexico, Julie thought I was avoiding her for her looks. Not that she looks bad. I told her I didn't and then she said she that it must be because I thought she was evil."
"Where did she get that idea from?" Rosamond asks.
"The internet," SG explains. "She told me that she would never want to hurt me and asked if I knew that. I lied and said I did. I really wanted to believe her. Because it seemed like she meant. But when we were deciding who to vote off she wanted to keep Noah and wouldn't say why. Which I thought meant Julie wanted to keep Noah so she could use him. I knew someone had to be lying and I chose Julie. Gwen had me persuade someone else to vote off Julie. And it worked. But when she left, she said that Noah lied about being secret best friends and that Gwen and Noah set her up. I don't know what to believe."
"Why didn't you trust Julie?" Rosamond asks. "She had been so nice to you. I admit that she is mysterious and doing exactly what Gwen said doesn't make her seem trustworthy. But she cared about you. And if someone cared about me like they did you then I would trust them. And Julie liked you, a lot."
"But how could she like someone like me?" SG asks.
"I get it." Rosamond says. "You believed that Julie was using you because you couldn't believe she would like you. SG, you need more self confidence. I don't really know you, but I'd say you're an awesome dude. And any girl would be lucky to have you. And Julie liked you."
"Thanks," SG says. "But what do I do now?"
"Well," Rosamond replies. "The best thing to do is to tell your team the truth. Its better than them finding out later."
"Thanks Rosamond, I feel a little better." SG says. "And I will tell them the truth."
"Your welcome," Rosamond says getting up. "And good luck. I'll be rooting for you."
SG and Rosamond wave goodbye as Rosamond continues her walk.
Later Jovi and Courtney are still in first class watching over Rosamond's cats. "Where is Rosamond?" Jovi asks. "She should have been back by now."
"Maybe we should go look for her." Courtney suggests.
"Good idea," Jovi says. "But one of us has to stay here and watch the cats."
"You stay, I'll go and look for Rosamond." Courtney says.
"Ok." Jovi replies.
Courtney goes out. She searches when she hears crying coming from the cafeteria. "Rosamond?" Courtney yells. As she walks in she sees Gwen crying. "Gwen?" Courtney asks.
Gwen looks up to see Courtney. Gwen turns away. "What's wrong?" Courtney asks.
"You don't wanna know." Gwen mumbles through her tears.
"Gwen," Courtney says. "I know that were not best friends but I'm trying to be a better person and I can tell your upset. Please tell me."
Gwen sighs. "Ever since Total Drama Island I've been a bad person. With breaking up with Trent and giving permission for his team to vote him out. Then after what I did to you and Duncan after we became friends. And now I lied to SG and made him think Julie was pretending to love him and using him. I set Julie up and had SG get someone else to join us. And I made SG miss out on the chance of being with Julie. And then I had innocent Julie voted out. I felt bad about it and talked with Duncan about it. And he tried to say what I did was right but I didn't agree. He got fed up and broke up with me."
"Oh Gwen," Courtney says. "I'm so sorry."
"Your sorry?" Gwen asks. "After I stole Duncan from you?"
"Duncan is a jerk." Courtney says. "I've learned that. And I know how you feel. I was so angry about being unfairly eliminated from TDI and the negative fan reaction I decided I would do anything I could to win. And I became a spoiled villain. I knew I wouldn't like it if someone had acted that way to me. After I lost TDA things just got worse and so did I. But I'm trying to be a better person. And I forgive you for what you did. I was so hung up on Duncan that I lost myself. The truth is I've never really had a good relationship because of my attitude. But I now realize how bad he was for me. And I think your in the same predicament. And the first thing to do is to get over Duncan."
"Wow," Gwen says. "Thank you. I feel a little better. And it means a lot you said that. But what should I do now?"
"I think you should be honest and apologize," Courtney says. "I know that it may seem hard but once you come clean everything will be better."
"Your right," Gwen says. She sighs. "I have to if I want them to forgive me. I'd better go tell them."
"Good luck." Courtney says patting her on the back.
Gwen smiles. "Thank you." She tells Courtney. Gwen walks off to talk to her team. Courtney walks back to first class. "Oh wait I forgot about Rosamond!"
"Hey Courtney." Rosamond says walking past her.
Courtney stares and then shrugs. A little bit later Nellie, Gwen and SG return to their team. "Guys, I have something I'd like to say." SG says.
"Wait," Sierra says. "You can't mean…"
"Yes," SG says. "I'm the one who voted for Julie. And I persuaded the other person to do it. Gwen tricked me and convinced me that Julie was using me and seducing me. She and Noah set up a whole scheme to make me believe them. And I fall for it. And I'm sorry. I couldn't…"
"I can't believe this!" Sierra yells. "You betrayed Julie! Who helped you?"
"Sierra," Gwen says. "Calm down. I wanted to apologize. I feel really bad about what I did. I had let the game get to me and put me down. I was focused to much on winning and surviving and I just lost it. I'm really sorry. Do you think you could forgive me?"
Sierra sighs….and then punches Gwen in the face! "You dirty…"
"Hi," Rhonda says alone sitting in the cafeteria. "What you were about to see was too violent for our younger viewers. So let's watch these penguins while I narrate about them."
The scenic changes to two penguins in the arctic. They're waddling around pushing snow. "Meet Mr. Popper and Ricky two penguins in the arctic." Rhonda narrated. "These two penguins are friends and are enjoying themselves." The penguins bend over and slide down the hill into the water. "These penguins are practicing they're diving so they can catch fish better." Rhonda explains. "It's also a fun. Funny fact about penguins they…" Rhonda stares off screen and has a funny look on her face. "What are they doing? ….Oh my god." The camera starts to turn to where Rhonda is looking (presumably where the video is playing) "DONT YOU DARE!" Rhonda screams with a paranoid look on her face.
"We have to show other footage then Sierra cussing and beating up Gwen." The camera man says.
"Well, this isn't any better." Rhonda explains.
"Are they being killed?" The camera man asks.
"Worse," Rhonda mutters.
"What could they be… oh my god." The camera man says.
"Change back to Sierra." Rhonda yells. "Ew, who would record footage of that!"
"What do you think Mrs. Popper would say if…" The camera man says.
"CHANGE BACK!" Rhonda screams.
The scenic comes back to show Sierra's hand in the shape of a fist and Gwen on the floor. SG, Noah and Mikey are standing away and starting at Sierra in fear. Nellie is next to Sierra looking depressed as ever. "Come on Sierra." Nellie says pulling Sierra away. Sierra looks angrily at the boys but a second before she leaves her eyes feel with tears.
Mikey raises his hand to stop them but SG puts his hand on his shoulder. Mikey looks down and sighs. Noah has anger in his eyes and he leaves. SG and MIkey leave as well, with Gwen alone on the floor. Gwen sighs and gets up. She sits on the bench and begins to cry.
Meanwhile Bradley is making his way to the confessional and sees Taylor waiting outside with a book in her hands. She has a big happy smile on her face. "Hi Bradley," Taylor says. "How are you doing?"
"Hey Taylor," Bradley says somewhat confused. "I'm good how are you?"
"I'm great," Taylor says. "I'm just waiting for Trent to finish using the confessional and then I'm going to."
"Cool," Bradley replies. "What's in the book?"
"It's Trent's journal where he writes down all his songs," Taylor explains.
"Sounds very personal." Bradley says.
"It is," Taylor says. "But we've become close and have become great friends. He is really sweet!"
"Sounds like you have a crush on him." Bradley says.
Taylor blushes. "No, not at all…"
"Good," Bradley says. "Because Gwen and Duncan just broke up and I think it might be because Gwen wants Trent back. And any girl Trent was dating or seemed to like was probably to fill the void."
"You think so?" Taylor asks getting sad.
"Oh no," Bradley says. "You do have feelings for him? But I thought you still liked your old boyfriend."
"Well," Taylor says. "I'm not over him fully but Trent has made me feel a whole lot better. Though I guess he only did to fill the void of Gwen."
"What happened between your old boyfriend?" Bradley asks.
Taylor sighs. "Well we have been dating since 5th grade. He had been so loving and caring. A week before we broke up he told me he loved me." Taylor starts to sniffle and wipes back a tear. "But then I went out to a restaurant with my friend and found him making out with Camilla, the head cheerleader and a girl who had tormented me since middle school."
"Did you want him back?" Bradley asks.
"Very badly," Taylor says taking deep breaths. "I begged for him back but he choose Camilla instead."
"Wow," Bradley says. "Do you think you might have been filling in for Camilla?"
"What do you mean?" Taylor asks.
"Do you think he was just dating you while he waited for Camilla?" Bradley asks.
"I didn't," Taylor says. "Do you think he was?"
"Well, Taylor," Bradley says. "You're a nice girl so either Camilla is much better than you or your boyfriend never really loved you and only used you. Or maybe both."
Taylor is doing her best to hold in her tears. "You…You think both?"
"I'm not sure," Bradley says. "But I am sure that Trent still craves Gwen and is gonna run right back to her. And he'll forget all about you."
Taylor trembles to contain her sadness.
"Oh," Bradley says. "I seem to have upset you. I'm sorry. I should go."
Bradley walks away with an evil grin on his face that Taylor can't see.
Trent walks out of the confessional. "Hey Taylor," Trent says. "You ok?"
"…." Taylor looks up and bursts into tears. "WHY! WHY! WHY!" Taylor runs off screaming and crying leaving behind Trent's journal.
Trent picks up his journal. He looks after Taylor with a sad look on his face.
Meanwhile Heather is sitting in loser class filing her nails. She looks around at her team. Cosmic River is napping on the floor, DJ is brushing his bunny, Lindsay is painting her nails, Chef is writing something in a journal and Duncan is craving wood still. Heather rolls her eyes and gets up wanting to get away from her team. Heather looks back at her team as she bumps into someone. She falls to the ground and ice-cream and fudge all over her, drenching her in a sundae. She stands up to see Barbie knocked over too. Barbie is also covered in ice-cream and the glass bowl she was carrying has somewhat shattered on the floor, though most of it remains intact. "…You. Look at what you did. You…" Heather says. Her tone sounds like she isn't reacting but anyone can tell she is about to freak.
Bradley walks in and seeing what is happening runs over quick. "Now just calm down Heather…"
"CALM DOWN…" Heather says. "THIS DISGRACEFUL PIG IN A DRESS JUST SPILLT HER SUNDAE ALL OVER ME!!!"
"I know but…" Bradley tries to say.
"Why did you even get a sundae?" Heather asks a little less but still very angry. "I just saw you swallow a chocolate bar 20 minutes ago. What you think you didn't get enough fat from that. Because I sure did!"
Bradley tries and fails to hold back a snicker as Chef laughs.
"You're a freak, Barbie." Heather says. "For one you eat crap. Your pot belly is proof of that. Two, you talk to no one but that's understandable since you have no friends.
And finally, you're the complete opposite of what your suppose to be. Your named Barbie, but you're not beautiful in anyway. Your just a nobody that no one would love. I doubt even your family could love you. Why did they name you Barbie? Were they expecting a beautiful kid?"
Barbie gets up and turns away, walking back down the corner.
"Good riddance," Heather says.
"Now that was wrong man," Cosmic River says. "Barbie may not love the earth and may have spilled her food on you, but you don't need to flip your wig."
"Are you making a joke about when I was bald?" Heather asks. "And don't even get me started on you…"
"Why don't you go take a shower... in the room with all the showers that has never been mentioned till now." Bradley says.
"Whatever," Heather replies walking away.
"Man, why is she so angry?" Cosmic River asks.
"I wish I knew." Bradley replies sighing and shaking his head.
"Why are you being so nice to Heather?" Duncan asks suspicious.
"To keep our team strong," Bradley replies. "If we start fighting then we'll lose and start turning on one another. We haven't lost yet and I would like it if we never do."
"Thats real far out cat," Cosmic River says. "We got make sure our winning streak raves on. That was just boss man."
"I like have no idea what some of the words you use mean," Lindsay states.
"What should we do to settle this?" DJ asks.
"I'll take to Heather after she cools down," Bradley says. "And I'll persuade her to apologize. Now let's all calm down and relax. We have a challenge today and I think it's about time we win."
The others nod and or shrug and Bradley smiles.
"Don't worry," Bradley says. "Everything will be fine."
"I love your optimism man," Cosmic River says. "And I think with you as captain we can win!"
"Thanks dude," Bradley says. "I appreciate the support."
"Anytime dude," Cosmic River says.
The scene changes to Bradley in the confessional. "That moron, he is rooting for me and I plan on disposing of him quickly. And all I need to do is to get DJ to join me. I already have his trust. It will be easy. But I can wait on eliminating him. I need to eliminate Duncan first. Then I'll use Barbie to get DJ to turn on Cosmic River."
Later Heather walks out of a room (presumably the shower room) fully dressed and sees Bradley waiting for her.
"Can I help you?" Heather asks.
"Don't you think you were pretty harsh back there?" Bradley asks.
"Don't start with me," Heather replies. "You dislike her too."
"Yes," Bradley says. "But this will cause some problems in our team."
"I don't care," Heather replies. "I hate almost everyone on the team if not everyone."
"Well, be careful," Bradley says. "People might vote you off if you're not careful."
"I've been on this show for four seasons now," Heather replies. "I think I know what I'm doing."
Heather walks off while Bradley rolls his eyes.
There Out-Back
Meanwhile in the cockpit Rhonda is telling a story to Jenny and Toby. "So then after Mocky and Lulu died I found a chest and then Ron poured some water on my neighbor Bob who was also the witch from Hansel and Gretel who knocked us unconscious with candy and watched American Dad without us earlier,"Rhonda explains. "The witch pretended to die but she didn't! Then I was all…Stop! Hammer Time and I killed the witch. Then everyone except the witch came back to life and I got to keep all the witch's stuff!"
Jenny and Toby stare back at her. "You need to stop going on the internet," Toby says.
"Seriously," Jenny says. "That is weirder than what pervs do on the internet."
"But I have other things to tell you," Rhonda says.
"I don't wanna hear any more of these stories," Toby says.
Jenny nods.
"Would you rather go get those purple curtains from storage I told you to get last chapter, while we were off screen?" Rhonda asks.
"So what else did you do?" Jenny asks.
"Well, there was this time I was a street girl named Lita and I was on Total Drama Island with a crazy pyromaniac chick named Vxysina and Donald Trump," Rhonda says. "So we did this race and Donald Trump used his limo to win immunity. Then we made a secret alliance to vote off Vxysina. And then we raced for the money and I teamed up with Trump till Vxysina promised me more money. Then we teamed up and became best friends. And we almost won but Trump stole the money and the host was crushed. So we tried to take it back but Lita died while Trump left and talked bad about us. Vxysina tried to persuade Death to let us switch places but Lita refused. She felt bad she had teamed up with Trump and felt Vxysina should live. She gave Vxysina five million dollars from the land of dead. Vxysina left and promised to take care of Lita's brother and return with a cute boy. And Lita said make sure he has a cut butt. In the end Trump used his money on himself and was punished when he died and will be for all eternity. Vxysina used the money to support herself, Lita's little brother and cure cancer. When Vxysina died she was rewarded when she died and Lita and her met again. And Vxysina did bring a boy with her and…he did have a cute butt."
"…I wished I had chosen to get the curtains." Jenny says.
"Isn't Lita a contestant next season?" Toby asks.
"We haven't even done the first aftermath yet, I don't think we can say anything about the next season." Jenny replies.
"So you guys wanna hear about how I became a trashy wife and had an awkward marriage and my husband was all *bow chick bow wow* and then a stork showed up with babies and I got a pet panda?" Rhonda asks.
A ding noise goes off.
"Oh look we've arrived for the new challenge," Jenny says. "Which means we can't hear your story."
"It also means we don't get anymore lines in this chapter," Toby says.
"WHAT?" Jenny says. "Stupid writer! She is such a h…"
But before Jenny can swear the scene changes to outside of the plane where the teams and hosts are in…The Outback.
"Weren't we all ready here?" Heather asks standing with her team. She stands away from Barbie who's right hand is covered in gauze.
"Calm down Lady Tremaine." Rhonda replies. "Yes, you were here last time but were coming here again. Just like the episode title says where competing Down Under."
"That is really the episode title?" Courtney asks.
"We were going to call it Total Drama Outback but that name was taken," Rhonda replies.
"Now for today's challenge will have five parts to it," Chris explains. "Depending on what place you get in each challenge you will get a number of points. First place gets fifteen points, second place gets ten and third gets five. Team captains will choose who will compete in each contestant. Four of the five challenges will require one person only while one will involve two contestants teaming up."
"Sounds easy enough." Gwen says.
"I do have a certain requirement." Chris said. "Taylor and Geoff must compete since they sat out in Egypt and Barbie must compete as well."
"Does this mean we will pick people to sit out and they will have to compete later?" Rosamond asks.
"No," Chris says. "You can choose whoever you want to do the challenge unless they have competed once all ready. Taylor, Geoff and Barbie must compete though. And those who aren't pick will not have to compete again later. Now the first challenge is called…Shrimp On The Barbie!"
"Shrimp would improve Barbie's appearance." Heather says.
"Your jokes are almost as funny as your high opinion of yourself." Rhonda replies. "For this challenge one member from each team will get fifteen minutes to cook shrimp on a barbecue. They'll have all sorts of spices, sauces and such to do that with. Team captains please choose who will being cooking shrimp."
"I think DJ should cook the shrimp." Bradley says.
"Um have you forgotten I'm a CHEF!" Chef Hatchet yells.
"Relax," Bradley says. "I know both of you would be great. I just think DJ would be better for this. He has a lot of talent and a whole lot of potential."
"You really think so?" DJ asks.
"Of course," Bradley replies. "You're an amazing cook."
Cosmic River gives a thumbs up to DJ. DJ smiled and walked to the grill while the others follow to watch. {C Bradley stops Chef. "Listen Chef you're a great cook," Bradley whispers. "But your grew at other things which I think could be used for later challenges. You obviously have more guts and stronger than DJ which we need so we finally win. DJ can cook and add his mama spice to it and we win easily. I also want to gain DJ's trust so this would be better. It has nothing to do with who's better. So just congratulate DJ when he wins."
Chef smiles and nods.
Meanwhile Team Adamantine try to find who will participate.
"Hey I can cook on a grill," Geoff says. "I do it all the time at my parties."
"Well, you do need to do a challenge," Jovi says. "I see no reason not to."
Geoff smiles and kisses Bridgette for good luck. He then makes his way to the grill.
At the same time The Fun Bunch try to decide who will compete.
"Well, who knows how to cook on a grill?" Gwen asks.
"I hate you so much." Sierra replies. "You are the worse thing to ever be on Total Drama."
"I wish you have a slow, horrible, painful and depressing death." Nellie says.
"I know your really mad but we need to try and win." Gwen explains.
Sierra is shown in the confessional. "Sadly Gwen is right. We need to win. If we lost almost everyone would vote for her. But she deserves worse punishment for what she did. So me and Nellie have decided we will torture her until she is broken! We will hurt her, we will humiliate her and we will ruin her life! Then we'll send the monster home. She doesn't have the right to be called a member of the Fun Bunch. The Fun Bunch are a group of awesome friends who bring humor and love. Gwen, nor SG, Mikey and Noah are true members of the Fun Bunch. And they now have to learn that when you hurt one of the Fun Bunch you hurt us all."
"Does anyone know how to use a barbecue?" Sierra asks.
"Well, one of my cousins held a barbecue and kinda taught me…" Mikey recalls.
"You can do the challenge," Sierra says. "But we still hate you."
Mikey sighs. "I know, I would too."
Mikey heads to the grill.
"While Rhonda supervises them we'll continue on with the next part of the challenge." Chris says directing them to follow him.
One scenic change later, the teams are standing away from the barbecuers who can be seen in the distance. Away in the distance a flag can be seen. {C "For this challenge one member will have to throw a boomerang. It must pass the one hundred yard marker flag and return to the thrower's hand. In case more than one team accomplishes this then the thrower will be judged on the distance the boomerang makes."
"Seriously," Jovi asks. "These challenges almost suck. They aren't even Total Drama like at all."
"They almost suck as bad as how long it took the author to post this chapter." Bridgette says.
"Agreed," Courtney says. "What took her so long?"
"Like I said the writer is a h.." Jenny says randomly being there with Toby.
"What are you doing here?" Nellie interrupts. "You weren't suppose to have anymore lines?"
"Ha," Jenny laughs. "I can do what I want, I'm invincible!"
Rosamond looks at Jenny and then punches her in the face knocking her down.
"I thought you said you were invincible?" Rosamond asks.
Jenny mumbles so swear words and yells "Help me up Toby!"
"Yeah I'm to busy doing…stuff." Toby replies.
"YOUR MOM TOBY!" Jenny screams knocking him down.
Then a random vulture picks them and carries them away. {C "Why were they in this scene?" Nellie asks. "Not that it really matters since many people die from haemorrhagic fevers. Those people die within days of getting it and it's incurable. Ebloa has a fifty of ninety percent chance of killing."
"With Julie gone were lacking comedy relief and those two are easy to use." Chris explains. "Now team captains pick your throwers!"
Team Adamantine isn't sure what to do.
"Hey Taylor you said you use to throw horseshoes on the farm right?" Trent asks. "Do you think you could do well in this challenge?"
Taylor bursts into tears and sits down on the ground.
"What's up with Taylor?" Jovi whispers asking Trent.
"I don't know," Trent replies whispering. "I got out of the confessional and she randomly bursted into tears."
"I thought she was feeling better?" Jovi asks.
"Me too," Trent replies. "But I guess not."
"Hey Taylor," Jovi asks. "Do you wanna try the challenge?"
Taylor sniffles. "I guess, I have to do a challenge anyway." Taylor gets up and walks to Chris.
At the same time the Bulldogs discuss what to do.
"I think Bradley should do the challenge," Lindsay says. "He would be great at it with all his muscles."
Bradley smiles at Lindsay. "I'l be happy to do it." He walks towards Chris.
The Fun Bunch aren't really communicating at all.
"I'll do the challenge." Gwen volunteers.
Gwen is shown in the confessional. "I have to try to get on good grounds with my team. Or else I'm done for."
"I hate you." Sierra says.
Gwen sighs and walks towards Chris.
"All right first up is Bradley." Chris states. Bradley walks up to the white line where they will start throwing. Bradley throws his boomerang. It goes far pass the 100 mark flag but manages to circle back into to Bradley's arm.
Bradley smirks.
"Well done Bradley," Chris says. "Now you throw Taylor."
Bradley passes by Taylor and whispers "Good luck, and I'm sorry about Trent."
Taylor bursts into tears. She lines up to the line and randomly flings her boomerang. It lands in the ground.
"Well, that sucked," Chris says. "All right your turn Gwen."
Gwen gulps and throws her boomerang. It circles around the flag and back to Gwen but fails to make it past the 100 maker.
"Well that was anti climatic." Chris says. "But with that The Bulldogs have fifteen points, The Fun Bunch have ten points and Team Adamantine has five points. Now let's check on our barbecue."
As the contestants arrive back to the grill the cooks are putting the shrimp on a plate. "Now then me and Chris will judge these shrimp."
DJ brings forth his shrimp. Rhonda and Chris take a bite. "This tastes really great!" Rhonda exclaims.
"You added your mama spice to this didn't you?" Chris asks.
DJ nods.
"Well, it tastes great!" Chris states.
DJ smiles as Bradley grins at Chef.
Next Geoff brings his shrimp and Chris and Rhonda taste it. "I taste some lemon butter in here." Chris says, "Its great!"
Rhonda nods.
"Thanks bro." Geoff says. Mikey steps forward carrying burnt shrimp on his dish. He sets it down and the shrimp turns to ashes.
"Well, you lost." Chris says. "So now me and Rhonda will decide the winner." A few minutes later Chris and Rhonda stand up. "The winner is…" Chris says. "DJ! So The Bulldogs now have thirty points, and Team Adamnatine and The Fun Bunch tie with fifteen points."
The Bulldogs cheer (except for Barbie and Heather).
"Congrats DJ," Chef says. "You earned us that win."
DJ blushes. "Thanks Chef."
"This challenge has been really boring," Heather says.
"Glad you care about that instead of the wars going on or the babies that die due to sudden infant death syndrome," Nellie says. "Glad to see the future leaders of the world are concerned with trivial matters."
"Well," Chris says. "We'll have to use the number one best thing guaranteed to make something exciting!"
"Julie!" Sierra asks hopefully.
"Uh, second best thing." Chris says. "Sheep and sweat!"
"Of course," Nellie says. "Because whenever I'm bored I go grab some sheep and sweat."
"TMI Nellie," Sierra replies.
Nellie sighs.
Later, everyone is somewhere else in the outback outside of a sheep pin. "For the next part of the challenge," Chris says. "You'll be giving these sheep a makeover!"
"I suppose its better than slaughtering them." Nellie says depressively. "Of course with the outbreak of Bluetongue in Europe things are bad for the sheep. Bluetongue replicates the sheep's blood vessels causing them to rupture. In ten days the sheep will die. And it's all due to the midges which carry the disease, moving to Europe. And why are they? Because global warming has made Europe warmer much to the midges liking."
"Shut up Nellie no one wants to listen to you!" Chris yells. "Anyway, one contestant will get one of these sheep and will have to give them the best makeover. The sheep with the best makeover wins. Now our sheep aren't exactly normal."
"What do mean they're not exactly normal?" Heather asks.
"Rhonda why don't you introduce us to the sheep." Chris says.
Rhonda nods. "First lets met Kynt." Rhonda points to a sheep alone in the corner. He is a black sheep who has a scowl on his face. "Kynt is super antisocial and hates having to fit in to society's standards. He is know to be a lone wolf and dislike being forced to do something."
"Pretty complex for a sheep." Chef says.
"Kynt doesn't like to what the farmer wants and I doubt he'll be easy to work with in makeovers." Rhonda says. "If he'd even look good with a makeover. And let's meet Rose!" Rhonda points to a female sheep happily skipping in the pen before she trips on a rock and falls face forward.
"That sheep reminds me of Lindsay," Heather comments. "In it's own pathetic little world."
"Didn't you call Lindsay a sheep in Hide And Be Sneaky?" Duncan asks.
"Anyone else realize I'm right here?" Lindsay asks.
"Rose here is very beautiful but she has one big flaw: her intelligence." Rhonda says. "Rose isn't a brain dead monkey but she is a little dense. Rose often get manipulated by the other female sheep jealous of her beauty. One sheep messed up Rose's wool and is in need of a makeover. And lastly Fluffy."
One crazed sheep runs around with berry fluffy fur. It Bas loudly and jumps on Kynt and Rose. The sheep proceeds to do a backflip. Then it stares at a fence post that randomly explodes. "So yeah Fluffy's crazy." Rhonda says.
"Why do these sheep sound familiar?" SG asks.
Sierra sighs. "If Julie was here I bet she would know."
"I bet she would." Rhonda says.
"So like I said each team will give a sheep a makeover. Since the Bulldogs won the last challenge, they can choose which sheep they would like. And since Team Adamantine got second last time they can chosen second. Team captains pick your sheep and makeover artists!"
The Bulldogs are deciding what to do.
"Well, who is gonna do the makeover?" Duncan asks.
"I think Lindsay would be great at it." Bradley says.
"Really," Lindsay asks. "You think I would be good in a challenge?"
"Of course," Bradley replies. "Your very talented Lindsay. And this challenge is based on your biggest strength: your flawless beauty. You will turn that sheep into something beautiful. I have faith in you."
Lindsay blushes. "Aw Bradley, you are so sweet." She hugs Bradley.
"Hate to ruin the lovefest here but what sheep are we choosing?" Heather asks.
"Rose," Bradley replies with Lindsay still hugging him. "She seems like she would like makeovers much more than the others. Lindsay why don't you go tell Chris you're doing the makeover and we choose Rose."
"Ok Bradley," Lindsay giggles. "I'll miss you!"
"Miss you too beautiful." He replies.
Lindsay rushes off to tell Chris.
Heather glares at Lindsay. "How can you flirt with such a moron?"
"Aw, your jealous of Lindsay?" Bradley replies.
"I'm not jealous of that bottle blonde airhead." Heather replies. "I just wish I didn't have to put up with her for so long. I do have to say that you have her wrapped around your finger more than Alejandro did."
"Are you saying I'm better at seducing than Alejandro?" Bradley asks.
"Sure," Heather replies. "You're better at seducing than Alejandro."
Heather is shown in the confessional. "You're also better at being more of a tool than Alejandro."
Lindsay is shown finish speaking to Chris. "Well, The Bulldogs have chosen Rose." An intern grabs Rose in a next and carries her away in a one of three small sheds. "In those sheds are where you'll being doing the makeovers. You'll have plenty of supplies in there. Now Team Adamnatine please pick what sheep you will use and who will be doing the makeover."
Team Adamnatine immediately tries to decide what to do.
"I'll do the makeover." Courtney says. "I obviously have an eye for beauty. And as for the sheep I'll use…"
"Courtney," Jovi says. "How many times must I tell you that I'm the leader? You can't just go making choices without my permission."
"Are you saying you don't think I could do a good makeover?" Courtney asks.
"No," Jovi replies. "But you should volunteer instead of state you're going to be in charge. But because I'm such a nice person I'm willing to compromise. You can do the makeover but I pick the sheep."
"Can you just please pick the sheep." Rosamond says. "No to be rude but your endless arguing is getting annoying."
"Well, since Kynt doesn't seem like the makeover type Fluffy is he best choice." Jovi replies. "Fluffy is a girl and you'll just have to assert yourself to keep her in control."
"And I can assert myself." Courtney replies. She walks off to tell Chris their decision.
As Courtney goes to tell Chris The Fun bunch just kinda wait.
"Ugh it's so hot out here," Nellie says unemotionally. "Reminds me of the flames of that burn innocent people thanks to illegal arson."
"Are you thirsty?" Sierra asks. "I have some Fruit Punch Kool-Aid if you want it?"
"You're not gonna to make the giant Kool-Aid guy appear are you?" Nellie asks.
"No, that would be weird," Sierra says. She then pulls a Cody shaped thermos out of her shirt. "I have some nice Kool-Aid in here!"
"You keep a Cody shaped thermos down your shirt?" Nellie asks. "That isn't obsessive."
"I keep it down there to keep Cody close to my heart, and my bosom," Sierra replies.
"I think I would prefer the Kool-Aid man." Nellie replies.
"Suit yourself," Sierra says drinking some of the Kool-Aid. "Ah, Cody."
"All right," Chris says. "Courtney will be doing the makeover for Team Adamantine and they choose Fluffy." Now Fun Bunch…"
Sierra walks forward. "I'm going to do the makeover and Kynt is left so yeah," Sierra states.
"When did you decide who would compete?" Chris asks.
"It's been about ten minutes since you explained the challenge." Nellie replies. "That's plenty of time. It's not like we need to take a whole scene to make a decision."
"Well, can you at least tell us why Sierra is competing?" Chris asks.
"Well, it was either me, Nellie, Noah or SG," Sierra says. "And I think we all agree that all of us would suck at this challenge, but I would suck least."
"That's true," Chris says. "All right the interns have moved all the sheep into a pen in the shed. Now you have thirty-five minutes or so while we do the next challenge. Good luck."
Chapter 6 Down Under Part 3: The Beasts of The Outback (The Sheep and Kangroos' Tale)
Later, the scene changes to an outdoor court with two hoops on the outside. There are three sides of bleachers, orange ones to the left, red ones to the right and purple ones outside of the south edge of the court. "For the next challenge we'll be playing netball."
"What is netball?" Bridgette asks.
"Well, netball is a big sport in Australia." Chris explains. "But the challenge is pretty much like basketball thanks to the author's research."
"Well, that seems super stupid." Jovi says.
Then the vulture that picked up Jenny and Toby flies by. "Like I said the writer is a h…" Jenny says but she can't finish because the vulture flies away.
"All of these jokes are getting old." Nellie replies.
"Ok," Rhonda says. "Everyone needs to stop breaking the fourth wall because no of us are as good as Julie."
"Agreed," Chris says. "Now for the challenge we'll be playing in teams of two. First the Bulldogs will face Team Adamantine in the first round. Every time someone makes a basket in the other team's basket the opposing team scores a point. The winner of that round will play The Fun Bunch. If the Fun Bunch win then well they win. But if they lose then they will play the other team that lost to decide who is worst. After that we'll check up on the sheep then do the final one person race with bonus points. Now pick your two players."
The Bulldogs are having trouble trying to decide.
"What are we going to do?" Heather asks. "Barbie still has to compete and the last challenge is a race! Barbie in a challenge with bonus points could cost us the win! Of course she'll suck at this challenge."
"But this challenge needs two players," Bradley says. "Which means the other player could win for us. And Chef is that player."
"Excuse me?" Chef asks.
"Chef you have great physical strength," Bradley states. "I mean you're a grown man. It doesn't matter that Barbie is useless. You can crush the others easily. That way we'll have so many points we can't lose even if we don't win the last challenge."
"Well," Chef says. "I guess I have no choice if we want to win."
Barbie stands away in the distance looking at her gazed up hand. Upon closer looking you can see that her gauze is a little bit red, indicating a small bit of blood soaked through.
A few moments later the two teams are getting ready to play. Barbie are at the north end near their goal. Jovi and Bridgette are at the south end near their goal. The two look at each other and nod. Rhonda blows a kazoo and throws the basketball into the court. Chef sprints forward and grabs the basketball. He rushes past Jovi who falls over. Then he rushes to the goal. Bridgette tries to block him but he simply knocks her on to the ground and performs a slam dunk.
"One point to The Bulldogs." Rhonda says.
The two teams get back in position and wait for the kazoo.
"How are we suppose to see what is happing with this basket in our way?" Noah asks.
"I wonder if Sierra is having fun." Nellie says.
The scene changes to Sierra washing Kynt's wool.
"Baa." Kynt baas. Then he bites Sierra.
"Stop that," Sierra says. "Know let's dye that fur a pretty color." Sierra picks up a bottle. "Let's dye it purple. Who doesn't like purple?"
Kynt kicks Sierra on the stomach. "I wonder if Courtney is having fun with her sheep." Kynt then picks up some random hot sauce. "Oh, please no." Sierra prays.
The scene changes to outside of Courtney's shed where a scream coming from Sierra's shed is heard. But Courtney is busy with her own problems. "Would you at least let me try this dress on you?" Courtney asks.
"BaAAaa!" Fluffy replies as she eats two awesome scarfs (that the author really wants and would look so awesome in). She then jumps on Courtney and pulls out some of her hair. "That's I'm going to mount your head on my wall along with your a…
"Baabaabaabaabaabaabaabaabaabaabaa!" Fluffy screams as she knocks over hairspray. Fluffy then finds an electric razor and picks it up with her teeth smiling devilishly. "I wonder if Lindsay is having as much trouble as I am." Courtney sighs. "Wait, why do I wonder that I hate Lindsay."
The scene changes to outside Lindsay's cabin where Courtney is screaming in anger. But Lindsay is busy. Busy having fun!
Inside Lindsay's cabin Rose is under a giant towel covering her whole body except for her eyes. Lindsay is filing her nails. "OMG Rose your nails look pretty. What color nail polish do you want, Pretty Priscilla Purple, Ravenous Ruth Red, Ostonishing Ophelia Orange, Macabre Melinda Magenta, or Tasty Tsuyoshi Turquoise?"
"Baa!" Rose replies excitedly.
"OMG I love that color too!" Lindsay replies excitedly. "I wonder how the next part of the challenge is going. I wonder how Bradley is doing. I should totally get a Bradley shaped thermos filled with Fruit punch flavored Kool-Aid and put it down in my chest. That way I can keep him close to my heart and my bosom."
"Baa!" Rose replies in agreement.
The scene changes to Chef making another slam dunk as Bridgette and Jovi are on the ground in pain. Barbie hasn't moved the whole time.
"Well, with that The Bulldogs win and will face off against The Fun Bunch." Rhonda announces.
"No thanks to Elena or Kendall or whoever over there." Heather says.
"Her name is like Barbie dude," Cosmic River says.
"It might as well be Elena," Heather replies. "It is a more deserving name."
A few seconds later Chef and Barbie are back at the north end of the court while Noah and SG are at the south end. "Why are we doing this challenge?" Noah asks.
"Because Nellie was left in charge and she hates us." SG replies.
Rhonda blows her kazoo and throws the ball in the middle of court.
Chef rushes forward to grab the ball. SG tries to snatch it from him but Chef pubes him down. Noah stands in the corner while Barbie still hasn't moved.
Chef throws the basketball and makes it.
"The Bulldogs earn a point." Rhonda says.
Noah and SG get back in the position.
"Noah I have a plan." SG whispers. "If we can distract Chef we can make a basket."
"I really don't care." Noah says. "Nor do I really like you SG."
"The feeling's mutual," SG replies. "But if you don't wanna go home than you'll work with me."
Noah sighs. "What do you want me to do?"
"Just fellow my lead." SG whispers.
The two face a pumped Chef and an emotionless Barbie. Rhonda blows her kazoo and throws the ball in the middle of the court. Chef sprints forward. "Hey is Rhonda choking on her kazoo?" SG asks pointing.
Chef turns around. "Is that trash dead?"
"Hey," Rhonda replies. "At least people enjoy my food. The only thing your food is good for is for challenge ideas in fanfictions and roadkill. Oh wait it is made of roadkill!!!"
"At least I could be used in challenges," Chef replies. "The only thing your good for is standing there and making Chris look better. Yeah your that ugly."
"Oh snap!" Rosamond says.
"At least my face is wrinkled old and looked like it has been hit by 4 wheeler!" Rhonda replies. "You haven't had a date in well, forever. Unless you count all the time you spent with Chris! But even he has grown tired of your saggy outdated bag of face!"
"And you have had a date?" Chef replies. "You've been alone all your life. The only life you have had has been stalking people whose fame you wish you possessed. You have no love life even though you're so eager. And you know that has to do with your appearance and your bland and creepy personality. And…"
A swoosh can be heard as SG throws the ball threw the goal.
"We would have thrown it sooner," SG says. "But it was getting good."
"Chef," Bradley says. "They're trying to distract you so they can win, ignore Rhonda and them."
Chef mumbles some swear words. "I will. I'm not going to tricked by that trash again."
Rhonda rolls her eyes. She blows her kazoo and throws the ball in the middle of the court. Chef once again rushes for it. "Hey didn't you think Rhonda burnt Chef?" Noah asks SG.
"I'm not falling for it scrawny kid." Chef replies.
"I felt Chef burnt Rhonda, he was obviously better at dissing Rhonda." SG replies.
Chef (having all ready grabbed the ball) rushes to the other end of the court.
"I would think that if I knew what Chef was saying at the end." Noah replies.
"I was saying that Rhonda only joined to live out her twisted dreams of meeting the contestants and having attention payed to her." Chef replies dropping the ball. "She came her looking to make new friends and to gain acceptance from freaks like you. But all she is accomplished is being bagged on by Heather and looking like a fool in front of all of us!"
"You don't know anything about me!" Rhonda replies. "But I know your an insecure man who feels unloved. So you take out your anger on your horrible cooking! And by traumatizing the contestants! By making their lives miserable you make yourself feel like you aren't the piece of crap you are. And know that you van't get a kick of torturing them you pick on me! All because you know you are a grown man and you have no job, no family and no life!"
Before Chef can reply another swoosh noise is heard. SG made another basket.
"The Fun Bunch have two and The Bulldogs have one." Rhonda announces.
"Chef stop focusing on Rhonda she is trying to get into your head." Bradley shouts.
"Rhonda," Chris says. "Stop talking during this challenge."
Rhonda sighs. She blows the kazoo and throws the ball in the middle of the court.
Chef sprints forward. "Hey is Rhonda sticking her tongue out at you?" SG asks pointing.
"I'm not falling for it geek." Chef replies. He grabs the ball and rushes forward.
"Well, were doomed," Noah replies. He stands away.
"I'm not giving up yet," SG replies. He tries to stop Chef but Chef pushes him down. But SG trips Chef. The ball bounces back over to Chef's side and lands at Barbie's feet. Barbie picks up the ball and moves to the other goal.
"Land it in the basket!" Bradley screams.
"Try and not screw this up like you do everything else!" Heather yells.
Barbie still walks to the basket.
"Hurry and get it in the basket you hippopotamus!" Duncan yells.
"I've seen you eat faster than you're going!" Heather yells. "Why don't you move your fat butt to the basket and not be useless for once in your existence!"
Barbie looks back at her team.
"What do you see a sundae?" Heather asks. "Go to the basket and throw it in there! You can stuff your face later! I bet you a real Barbie doll could do this faster than you are! Now go and throw the ball in the basket!"
"Give me that!" Chef yells having gotten up. He tries to snatch the ball from Barbie but hits her hand covered in gaze and knocks the ball on the ground. Barbie winces in pain.
"Oh stop crying," Heather yells. "You should have made the basket when you had the chance freak!"
Barbie sighs angrily. She looks back and picks up the ball.
"Give me that you maggot!" Chef yells.
Barbie throws the ball at Chef's crotch. Chef falls over wincing in pain.
Barbie then picks up the ball and walks over to her team's goal.
"What do you think you're doing?" Bradley asks. "You don't throw the ball in our basket!"
"I knew she would screw this up!" Heather yells.
Barbie throws the ball into her own goal.
"The Fun Bunch win!" Rhonda announces.
"But our own team member threw it in our goal!" Bradley yells. "That isn't fair!"
"Sorry," Rhonda replies. "But the rules were, every time someone makes a basket in the other team's basket the opposing team scores a point. It doesn't say that the opposing team has to score the basket. So The Fun Bunch win. Which mean the total score is The Bulldogs leading with forty points, The Fun Bunch close with thirty points, and Team Adamnatine our last with twenty points."
Bradley whispers to Heather. "Tell you what, if we lose this challenge we'll vote off Barbie."
Heather smiles evilly.
"Now let's check on those sheep." Chris says.
Later back near the sheds, three red curtains are each covering a small stage outside . Next to each stage is one of the three sheep makeover artists. Lindsay looks happy, Sierra's eyes are red and Courtney is a disaster, her hair coved in soap and other strange liquids. Her shirt is stained in with makeup and shreds of clothing are all over her.
"Behind these curtains are the sheep." Chris announces.
"Really," Nellie asks. "I had no idea. It's not like this is where the challenge with sheep take place or that whoever did the makeover is standing next to curtain. And the sheep silhouettes behind the curtains weren't a clue either."
"You need to take some antidepressants." Chris replies.
"I did a long time ago but it only made me think of the ill children in third world countries who aren't getting medical attention or even basic needs for living and will die a painful and early death."
"Anyway each artist will describe what they tried to capture with it." Chris says. "Courtney you go first."
Courtney frowns. "I couldn't do a proper makeover because my sheep was nuts!"
The curtain pulls up to see Fluffy with random stains in her wool and shreds of clothing in her fur. "BAA!" Fluffy screams as she attacks Rhonda.
"HELP ME!" Rhonda screams. Rhonda tries running and Fluffy follows.
"All right Sierra lets see what you did." Chris says.
The curtain pulls up to see an unhappy Kynt…dressed like Sierra. Wearing sheep sized clothes like her Kynt also has his wool dyed purple and braided like Sierra's hair.
"I tried to capture myself in this look." Sierra says. "It would have been easier but Kynt put hot sauce in my eyes."
"I would to if someone tried to make me look so ugly." Chris replies. "Lindsay let's see your makeover."
Lindsay claps in excitement as the curtain opens up to reveal a beautiful Rose. She has her fur died a beautiful pink and is wearing a beautiful and fancy yet somewhat simple ruffly red dress. She has her braided into two braids with pink and red roses. The other sheep in the pin not chosen for the challenge drool, cheer and even whistle. "I tried to capture what a rose is in this makeover," Lindsay says. "A rose is beautiful and appealing and can be very colorful. It's also natural. But a rose has all this beauty people have admired forever but its simple. My design has two basic colors and isn't too complicated and has a lot of flair. Its simple yet its till something beautiful."
"Wow," Chris says. "That was beautiful Lindsay. Your team wins hands down!"
The Bulldogs cheer (except for Barbie and Heather of course). Rose baas happily while Lindsay cheers. Bradley comes over and winks. "I knew you could do it."
Lindsay blushes. "You're the one who motivated me to do my best." She replies.
"I wish I took credit for that amazing makeover," Bradley says. "But you made that all by yourself with the skills you possessed inside yourself. You know after we win the challenge how about we go hang out alone."
"Like, like a date?" Lindsay asks hopefully.
"If you'll let it be a date then it can," Bradley replies seductively in her ear.
LIndsay cheers and hugs Bradley.
Heather watches and frowns.
Fluffy returns pulling Rhonda by Rhonda's hair with her teeth.
"As for second place," Chris says. "Both sucked but Sierra's makeover is a makeover so the Fun Bunch get second."
"I thought you were a great makeover artist," Jovi teases Courtney.
"You're the one who gave me the wacky sheep," Courtney replies.
"I thought it would be best," Jovi replies. "Besides I thought that you could handle her. I guess I was wrong."
"So the scores as of know," Chris says. "The Bulldogs are leading with fifty-five points, The Fun Bunch have forty and Team Adamantine is last with twenty-five points. Now time for the final challenge!"
And as the teams leaved the three sheep looked on each feeling different. Rose was happy with her look but sad to leave Lindsay. Lindsay and her had a big hug before she left. Both Rose and Lindsay tear up a little. But they knew they would cross paths again. Kynt is angry with his look and happy to see them leave. He is a loner and prefers his seclusion and solitude. And Fluffy is crazy so who cares what she thinks. As the teams leave the sheep including these special three were loaded into a truck, bringing them back to where they came from. While most of these sheep would live out their days as normal sheep those three would live a different life. Their experience today had changed their perspective and made them different. And someday they would be grateful for it…
Later everyone has had moved to a different area of the Outback. "Now as most of you know the last challenge is to be a race. But unlike a normal race you'll be racing…on a kangaroo! Teams will choose a racer and only one racer. No more than person to a kangaroo. Then they have ten minutes to find a kangaroo with the only thing they can use to get them is kangaroo bait."
"What's in the kangaroo bait?" Rosamond asks.
"Whatever kangaroo's eat processed into pellet like stuff." Chris replies. "If you fail to find a kangaroo then you get zero points. If you find one you can either ride in it's pouch or use a friendly kangaroo harness. Then you ride the kangaroo through the race. The points you win are different this time. First gets fifty, second gets twenty and last gets fifteen." {C "So it didn't really matter that we won almost all the challenges because whoever wins this won takes home first place!" Bradley yells.
"Yup," Chris replies. "Now before we began Rhonda tells us what are course is like."
Rhonda steps forward with a poorly drawn map on a stand. "Well, the kangaroos will start on that white line over there." Rhonda says pointing over to a white line. "Then they'll go forward on a pretty simple course till you get to a path of jagged rocks. Then you'll come towards a fork in the road. And then have to make your way through a path of mud. Then you'll reach three chariots with angry elderly women in them. You'll tie the chariot that matches your team color to your kangaroo's tail. Then pull the old lady through a course with random land-mines hidden underground to the finish-line. Now as soon everyone has picked a racer will give you kangaroo bait and we can start! Cue the decision scenes!"
Team Adamnatine is trying to decide what to do. Taylor stands away picking the petals of a purple flower. "Ok so either Rosamond or Trent has to do the challenge," Bridgette says. "So who should do it?"
"Where is Rosamond?" Jovi asks looking around.
Rosamond walks up to her team with her cats and a kangaroo following her. "Hey guys what's up?" Rosamond asks.
"Why is a kangaroo following you?" Courtney asks.
"While Rhonda was giving that speech my sweet kitties when off to play," Rosamond explains. "And they become with this kangaroo here I've nicknamed Bruce."
"Why did you nickname him Bruce?" Trent asks.
Rosamond shrugs. "He looks like a Bruce to me. Anyway they brought him back here to meet me and now where friends!"
"Well, this is extremely convenient." Bridgette says.
"Rosamond do you think you and Bruce can do the race?" Jovi asks.
"Of course," Rosamond replies. "Why else would the author have me become friends with a kangaroo randomly?"
"I thought I said no more breaking the fourth wall!" Rhonda screams.
"Sorry," Rosamond says. "Come on cats!" Rosamond's cats meow and jump in Bruce's poach. Rosamond and Bruce walk to Chris to tell him they're the rider.
Meanwhile The Bulldogs try to decide who will ride.
"I'll do this part of the challenge." Heather states.
"Like a kangaroo would come around you." Duncan says. "You'd scare it off."
"I think Cosmic River should do this challenge." Bradley says.
"That would be groovy man," Cosmic River says. "And I'd be happy to do it man but uh why me?"
"You've got compassion," Bradley replies. "You can easily befriend a kangaroo and work with it to reach the finish line."
"Aw thanks man," Cosmic River replies. "I'll try."
Cosmic River walks to Chris.
"Why didn't you let me do the challenge?" Heather whispers to Bradley.
"Because you would have thrown the challenge so we could vote out Barbie." Bradley replies.
Heather sighs. "Am I that predictable?"
"Do you really want an answer?" Bradley replies.
Then Nellie walks forward to Chris.
"Why are you doing this challenge?" Chris asks Nellie.
"Because everyone else has done a challenge." Nellie replies.
"Well," Chris says giving the three racers kangaroo bait. "Rosamond has her kangaroo so you two have ten minutes to find yours!"
Cosmic River looks for him a kangaroo. He sticks his hand out filled with kangaroo bait. He walks up to a female kangaroo. "Hey there," Cosmic River says.
The shy kangaroo jumps beyond a rock. "Hey I'm not gonna hurt you. I wanna see if you wanna be my partner. I have some hip kangaroo bait." The kangaroo jumps forward and nibbles the bait. She instantly starts jumping up and down and grabs Cosmic River, bringing him to the start line.
A little bit later Nellie shows up in front of her team. "Where is your kangaroo?" Sierra asks.
"I ate it." Nellie replies sarcastically.
"Nellie your all ready fat enough you don't need more food," Sierra states. "Plus we need it for the challenge!"
"I couldn't find one and a vulture stole my bait." Nellie says.
"Sorry about that." Jenny says eating Nellie's kangaroo bait still with Toby in the vulture's claws.
"Well, we need a kangaroo or we lose!" Sierra yells.
"Really," Nellie replies. "It's not like I wasn't there with you when he said that!"
Then a mechanical kangaroo wheels itself up to Nellie and puts her in its pouch.
"I thought you said you ate your kangaroo?" Sierra asks.
"This isn't my kangaroo," Nellie replies. "It's a robot that is kidnapping me!"
"Well, use it to win the race." Sierra says as the kangaroo wheels itself to the start.
A few seconds later, Rosamond is on her kangaroo with her cat's in its pouch. Cosmic River is on his kangaroo and Nellie is in whatever her thing is.
"On your mark," Chris says. "Get ready,…GO!"
The kangaroos race off. Rosamond's takes the lead followed closely by Cosmic River and Nellie far beyond.
"Nellie hurry up!" Sierra screams.
"What part of kidnapped do you not get?" Nellie asks.
"The part with kid in," Sierra replies. "What's to kid about abducting children?"
Cosmic River's kangaroo dances through the race. "You're a real groovy dancer Matilda!" he says.
Bradley faepalms. "Who names a kangaroo Matilda?"
"What person would have someone Matilda," Heather says. "It's a really dumb name."
Meanwhile, a girl named Matilda who was watching the show calls her lawyers to sue the show.
But back to the kangaroo race. Rosamond gets a big lead when a short man from Charter pulls up on a scooter.
"Who are you?" Rosamond asks.
"I'm your mom," The man replies sarcastically.
"At least my mother loves me," Rosamond replies. {C "I'm looking for someone named BeetleJuice." The man from Charter says.
{C "Meow." Beetle juice replies sticking his head out of Bruno's pouch.
"What are you doing calling Charter?" Rosamond asks.
"He called to get a TV installed." The man replies.
"What," Rosamond asks. "Are you trying to get cable in a kangaroo's pouch?"
BeetleJuice smiles mischievously but shakes his head. "Meow."
"Don't lie to me," Rosamond replies. "And if you are why are you getting Charter? Direct TV is much easier."
"Meow, meow." BeetleJuice replies. He then picks up the man from Charter and his scooter and pulls him in the pouch.
At the same time Matilda starts to pirouette. She gets even faster. "WOOOOOO!" Cosmic River yells happily as Matilda pirouettes right in front of Bruce and takes the lead.
"Now were cooking gas Matilda!" Cosmic River cheers.
"If your gonna kidnap me can you at least let us win?" Nellie asks the robot kangaroo.
The robot kangaroo revs up as it's tailpipes shoot smoke out. The robot kangaroo bursts into the lead, leaving the other two in smoke.
"Look they're getting close to the jagged rocks." Rhonda says.
As Nellie's kangaroo heads to the jagged rocks its wheel's hit them. It spins out of control and swerves out of control. It then falls down in the middle of the course, crushing Nellie under it. "Why does this happen to me?" Nellie asks under her kangaroo.
Matilda pirouettes over the rocks. Bruce follows by jumping on Nellie's kangaroo and then over the rocks. Bruce then speeds up putting himself in front of Matilda. Then they head to a fork in the road. Rosamond takes the right way and Cosmic River takes the left.
As Rosamond continues on her way she notices a man with a beard wearing rags following her. "Can I help you?" Rosamond asks.
"I need a ride to a place not far from here," the man replies. "Can you give me a lift?"
"Um sorry," Rosamond replies. "I don't take hitchhikers."
"GIVE ME THE KANGAROO!" The hitchhiker yells.
"AH!" Rosamond screams. "You can't have Bruce!"
"Yes, I can," The hitchhiker yells. "And I will rename him Rhonda!"
Bruce kicks the man in the groin angrily. "Why do homeless people always try to steal my kangaroo?" Rosamond asks.
Meanwhile Nellie and her kidnapper head down the same path as Cosmic River. Using their thrusters they pass Cosmic River.
"Wow," Cosmic River says. "Isn't they're a speed limit?" As Nellie finishes going through the fork in the road she comes to…another fork in the road.
"Really," Nellie asks. "Is that the best they could come up with?"
Nellie takes the left again and…comes across another set of jagged rocks.
"Why me?" Nellie asks as the same thing happens again as it did last time.
Meanwhile Rosamond comes across the mud path, which is thin and shallow. Cosmic River follows closely behind.
"What should we do?" Rosamond asks.
"Meow!" Vincent yells from Bruce's pouch.
"Oh yeah I could just go around." Rosamond replies. Rosamond looks to see Cosmic River has done the same thing. "Uh oh, let's go Bruce!"
As Rosamond continues onward she asks, "So what are you guys watching?"
"Meow," Coraline replies.
"Shrek 4 huh," Rosamond says. "Is it as good as the others?"
"Meow, meow, meow." BeetleJuice says.
"Well, sequels never can." Rosamond replies. "I mean the first was great but they got worse as they go. I'm mean I liked the second but not as much as the first and the third was ok but I have heard the fourth was never as good as the first. I mean I'm sad its over but I don't know what they would have done for the fifth."
"Meow meow meow?" Wednesday asks {C . {C "Of course I'm excited for Puss In Boots!" Rosamond replies. "It's not Shrek which means it will be different so hopefully it will not feel like a bad sequel but still has the Shrek charm I'll love it. Plus it's about cats! You know I love cats!"
"Meow meow meow," BeetleJuice mumbles.
"What was that BeetleJuice?" Rosamond asks.
"Meow meow meow." BeetleJuice replies innocently.
"That's what I thought." Rosamond says.
A little bit later the three kangaroos are back on course have positions have switched a little. Rosamond has taken the lead, Cosmic River follows close and Nellie follows close as well though still miserable as always.
Then they get to the chariots. In each is a very angry woman. In Team Adamantine's chariot a fat elderly woman sits. She is wearing a blue flowery dress and tacky high-heels. She is cross-eyed and has a poof with sliver hair. Rosamond pulls up and quickly hops off the kangaroo.
Rosamond pulls up to the orange chariot with the crazy lady inside.
"Sorry to make you wait miss," Rosamond says.
"My children never call," The old lady replies.
"Um I'm sorry." Rosamond replies confused. She ties the chariot to Bruce's tail and hurries off.
Cosmic River pulls up to his red chariot. Inside is a fat elderly woman with short grey hair and a scowl on her face. She is wearing a lime green dress, a moss green sweater vest and green tacky shoes. "Sorry to make you wait granny." Cosmic River says tying the the chariot to his kangaroo's tail.
"I'm not your granny sonny," The woman replies. "And you kids today are so rude, making a sweet old lady wait forever."
"Sorry bout the wait grams," Cosmic River says hopping on Matilda. "But now prepare for a groovy ride. It will be a gas!"
"You children today and your lingo," The old woman complains. "Back in my day when we used the word groovy we were describing something with grooves. And when we called something a gas it meant that someone had…"
But Cosmic River heads off behind Rosamond before the old lady can finish her sentence.
Nellie's kangaroo pulls up to her chariot. Inside is a large, heavyweight african woman wearing glasses and holding a purse. "Child where the heck you been? I have been waiting all day for you to show your ugly rear up here!" The old woman hits Nellie repeatedly on the head with her purse.
"Would you mine stopping so we can go?" Nellie asks.
"Would you mind be less UGLEE?" The old woman asks. {C The robot kangaroo ties the chariot to its tail and speeds off with the old woman still hitting Nellie on the head. {C Later the chariots are all still racing with Matilda in the lead followed by Bruce then by the robot kangaroo. {C "Girl can't you go any faster?" The woman Nellie is pulling asks. "This isn't the DMV! I can't not be waiting on frumparella to lead her mechanical klunk to the finish. Its like the stupid leading the stupid and wouldn't you know I gotta be pulling up the rear."
"Your rear is big enough to be the front" Nellie replies. "After all they look so alike no one would know the difference."
"Oh child, you need to zip that lip before I make it fat!" The woman replies as she starts to hit Nellie on the head.
The two distract the kangaroo that he doesn't the sign about land-mines ahead. "Don't get your granny panties in a twist," Nellie says. "If you’re not wearing an adult diaper."
"I maybe old but your face has more wrinkles then my a…"
Suddenly the kangaroo hits a landmine and gets thrown in the air, chariot and all.
"Well, that just leaves us and Cosmic River." Rosamond says.
"I think I lost my pants." The crazy lady tells Rosamond.
"I'm so creeped out right now." Rosamond says.
"Meow meow meow." BeetleJuice says.
"That's just nasty," Rosamond replies. "But looks there's the finish line! Nothing can stop us from winning now!"
Then…
Bruce trips on a rock. And then Nellie and her kangaroo fall on the finish line, taking home first place. Cosmic River then crosses the finish line.
"Seriously," Rosamond asks. "Oh well I guess it was fun."
"Thank goodness its over." Nellie says climbing out of the kangaroo and walking away. "Not that there is any goodness in the world."
"All right," Chris says. "It looks like The Killer Klepto…"
"Wait," Bradley complains. "That kangaroo is a robot!"
"There is no rule against it being a robot." Chris replies. "So as I was saying The Killer Klepto…"
Then randomly, a bunch of strange random people climb out of the kangaroo and run off.
"What The Heck?" Nellie asks.
"Well, since The Fun Bunch had more than one rider they get last place," Chris states. "After all the rules did say no more than one rider. So…The Bulldogs win with one hundred and five points! And they won the reward of a special buffet in their honor. And the losers are…"
Lonely At The Top
"…Team Adamantine with forty-five points against The Fun Bunch's fifty-five points."
“Anyone could have figured that out if they just did the math.” Nellie replies.
“Shut up Nellie,” Chris yells. “So anyway Team Adamantine will see you at elimination. Any idea who you’re voting out?”
Taylor (sitting down) is shown crying. Her teammates look at her angrily except Jovi and Trent who looked worried.
Later everyone is on the plane and Jovi, Courtney, Rosamond, Bridgette and Geoff are shown discussing with each other.
“So I think we should all vote off Taylor.” Courtney states.
“I agree with Court.” Geoff says.
“I agree with my Geoff.” Bridgette says snuggling him. Geoff smiles back happily.
“Come on guys,” Jovi says. “Yes, Taylor didn’t do well in the challenge but almost all of us didn’t. Besides I think Trent is the weaker link. He hasn’t really done anything.”
“That’s because you haven’t chosen him for any challenges,” Courtney replies. “Besides Taylor is a wreck.”
“I thought you said not to judge her because she had a bad break up and had been cheated on?” Jovi asks.
“Yes,” Courtney replies. “But Taylor has proven to be a really weak link. She cries a lot and doesn’t do anything to help and costs us challenges. At least when I had my break up with Duncan I was being helpful.”
“Didn’t you throw challenges to eliminate Gwen?” Rosamond asks.
“Look Taylor is nice but she is way too moody,” Courtney replies. “One minute she has really gotten over her boyfriend then she is just as unstable as always. And who knows if she’ll become stable again? What if she becomes somewhat happy then starts to have a breakdown further along? She could cost us a challenge when were close to the merge and we need to have members. It would be better to bring someone who we know isn’t as uncontrolled.”
“Come on can we give her a second chance?” Jovi asks.
“I kind of feel like we gave Taylor one in Egypt,” Bridgette says. “And you really haven’t given Trent a chance to try the challenges.”
“What do you think Rosamond?” Jovi asks.
“I don’t know,” Rosamond replies. “I’m not sure what to do. But you are the captain so if you think keeping Taylor is better to keep for the team then shouldn’t we do it?”
“Listen Jovi,” Courtney says. “I know your Taylor’s friend and you feel guilty about how you treated her in Egypt but you need to do what is best for the team. And that’s vote off Taylor. But you are the captain and if you think it is better for the team we will support you.”
“The one time you don’t fight for leadership and I have to make an extremely critical and hard decision.” Jovi says sighing.
“I want to see if your judgment as leader will help us.” Courtney teases. “And I think you know what we need to do.”
Jovi sighs. “How about I ask Taylor why she has become sad again and then we meet back here ten minutes before the ceremony. Then I’ll tell you what we do.”
Everyone nods in agreement.
Meanwhile Taylor is trying to dry her eyes when Trent comes run towards her. “Can we talk Taylor?” Trent asks. Taylor turns away. “What did I do to make you so upset?” Trent asks.
“Why did you befriend me Trent?” Taylor asks.
“Because I saw you were in pain,” Trent answers. “And I knew how I felt after me and Gwen…”
“You said you still haven’t gotten over Gwen didn’t you?” Taylor asks.
“Well, yes,” Trent replies. “But…”
“She and Duncan broke up,” Taylor states. “You can go back to her. She probably would appreciate you since you still love her.”
“Just because Gwen and Duncan break up doesn’t mean me and Gwen will get back together.” Trent replies. “And why does that make you angry?”
“You only used me to feel the void of losing Gwen.” Taylor yells. “You didn’t want to be my friend. You just wanted someone to fill in for Gwen. Just like Nick only wanted me to fill in for Camilla. Your both the same!”
“Your crazy,” Trent replies angrily. “I was just trying to be a friend to you and now you’re treating me horribly and accusing me of lies. I have had it with your constant mood swings. I’m voting you off tonight and I know the others will.”
Trent storms off leaving Taylor alone. Taylor fells to the floor and begins to cry. Jovi runs in and rushes up to Taylor. “Are you ok,” Jovi asks. “I was looking for you when I heard yelling and ran in.”
“Trent,” Taylor mutters in between her sobbing. “We yelled at each other. He has been using me to fill in for Gwen like my old boyfriend had done with me. And Gwen and Duncan broke up today. I was so sad and angry thinking Trent would leave me I lost control of my emotions and blew up at him. And it ended in a screaming match.”
Jovi hugs Taylor. “It’s ok,” Jovi tells Taylor. “This can be worked out and everything will be fine. Come on lets go get a tissue.”
Jovi helps Taylor up. “Wait,” Taylor says. “Trent also said he was voting me off tonight and everyone else will too.”
“Taylor,” Jovi says. “You…”
“I want you to promise me that you will vote Trent tonight.” Taylor says. “You can persuade the others to vote Trent and make sure I don’t go home.”
“Well,” Jovi replies. “I don’t know if I can…”
“Please,” Taylor begs. “Promise me you will vote for Trent.”
“I…”
“Please,” Taylor begs. “Do this for me?”
Jovi sighs. “I promise I will vote for Trent tonight.”
Taylor dries her eyes and cracks a smile. “Thank you Jovi.” Taylor says hugging her. Jovi hugs back but has a worried look on her face.
A little bit later Jovi walks back to the meeting place and slumps next to Rosamond who is petting Vincent. “Are you ok Jovi?” Rosamond asks.
“I talked to Taylor.” Jovi states sighing.
“How did it go?” Rosamond asks as Vincent jumps off her lap.
Jovi sighs. “Taylor became upset because she thinks Trent was using her to replace Gwen. Just like her ex was. And now that Gwen and Duncan have broken up she thought he was going to leave her.”
“It sounds like Trent is a jerk.” Rosamond replies.
“But I don’t know how Trent feels and what he thinks.” Jovi says. “And I don’t have enough time to find out.”
“WellWell, things could always be worse.” Rosamond says optimistically.
“They are,” Jovi replies. “Trent and Taylor fought and Trent swore he would vote off Taylor. And I promised Taylor that I vote for Trent tonight.”
“Are you going to vote for Trent tonight?” Rosamond asks scooting closer to her friend.
“I don’t know what to do.” Jovi replies. “I want to keep Taylor here. She is my friend and I still feel guilty about how I treated her in Egypt. And I feel so bad that she has had a horrible broke up and that Trent has sworn to vote her off. And I promised her I vote off Trent and I don’t want to go against my word. And I don’t want to betray my friend. I could ruin our whole friendship and she could hate me. But as a team we can’t afford for Taylor to change moods suddenly and cost us a challenge. She is unpredictable and maybe even unreliable which won’t help us or get the others to like her. And if we do lose again there might not be anyone else to vote off than Taylor. And everyone else wants it. As a leader, I should go with what is best for us and that seems to be vote off Taylor. But as a person and a friend, voting off Taylor is a horrible thing to do to a friend and the wrong thing to do. I don’t know what to do. Usually I would make the best decision for the team but the circumstances are different than they ever have been, and… I want to do what’s right. I admit I tend to ignore what my heart says and do what my head says but sometimes it makes me feel like a bad person. Like I’m a traitor and a villain. No matter what I do, I’m not going to be happy I did it.”
Rosamond hugs Jovi. “I wish I could help you,” Rosamond tells Jovi. “But I don’t know what is the best decision. I don’t know if you should be strategic or if you should do what your heart tells you. I don’t know how people will react when you make your choice. But I do know that no matter what you choose, I will support you, no matter who disagrees. And I know that you still have me as a friend if things go wrong.”
Jovi smiles. “Thanks Rosamond,” Jovi replies. “I appreciate that more than anything. And I wish you could help me. But it my decision and no one can help me make it. But thank you for supporting me.”
“Your welcome,” Rosamond replies. The two let go of their embrace and Jovi closes her eyes and concentrates on what to do. Rosamond gives a small smile and sits quietly.
A few minutes later Jovi opens her eyes and says, “…I know what I have to do.”
Later, Team Adamantine is at the elimination room. Tension can be felt in the room. Taylor looks at Jovi with a hopeful smile. Jovi replies with a smile, but it is clearly false. Jovi then turns her head to avoid Taylor’s look. Taylor turns around with a look of confusion and sadness.
“Nice to see you again Team Adamantine,” Chris says. “Know then has everyone voted?”
The scene cuts to Trent in the confessional with the stamp in his hand and passports of all his team members on them. However, the passports are positioned so that you can’t see whose passport is whose but the contestants can. “You think I used you as a replacement for Gwen?” Trent asks stamping a passport angrily. “I just tried to be your friend. And I thought we had formed a close connection. I thought we might have even become…closer. But it was you who was just using me to fill in for you ex. And now you plan on making me the bad guy? You’re the one at fault. And tonight you’ll be leaving.”
Taylor is shown in the confessional. She stamps a passport. “I’m tried of getting my heart broken. I thought you wanted to be my friend. I even thought that maybe…we could be more. That I could get over my ex and love someone else. But you just broke my heart, the heart you put back together. And now hopefully, you’ll leave. And maybe my heart can breathe a little easier.”
Jovi is shown in the confessional. She takes a deep breath and stamps a passport.
Rosamond is shown in the confessional with her cats. “Meow?” Coraline asks.
“Sure you can stamp the passport,” Rosamond replies handing Coraline the stamp.
Coraline puts the stamp in her mouth and walks over to a passport. “Meow.” Coraline says preparing to stamp it.
“Not that one,” Rosamond yells. “That one is mine.” Rosamond grabs the stamp and stamps a passport.
“Meow,” Coraline says.
“Sure you were,” Rosamond replies.
The scene changes back to the elimination room. “All right when I call your name you will receive a barf bag of airline issue peanuts. And the first barf-bag goes to…Courtney.”
Courtney smiles and catches her barf bag.
“…Bridgette and Rosamond.” Chris announces as Rhonda tosses the two their barf bags.
“And…Jovi and Geoff.” Chris says throwing the two their barf bags.
Trent and Taylor look at one another (both sitting as far away as possible from the other) but quickly turn their heads away.
“And the final barf bag goes to…
“…T…”
Suddenly the scene changes to a room with a purple couch with some boxes on it. Sitting on it is…Julie.
“Hi everyone it’s me, Julie!” Julie says waving at the camera. “Why did I say that? Of course you know who I am. So how are you? What have you done lately? I’ve been ok. Except I was voted off last episode by two of my so-called friends. No to mention Total Drama Outback was cancelled. But I’m here because the producers thought it would be fun to ruin the dramatic elimination and have me appear. That’s just how awesome I am. So anyway, some of you guys have sent packages to the studio of things you want me to have. So the studio decided to have a little segment where I open them. Why in the middle of the elimination? To mess with you and possibly anger you. But I’m here so how can you be angry? And people say such bad things of TV executives. So let’s start the Segment thingymagingylalingy!”
Julie grabs a package next to her on the couch. “This package is from RTSF. You parents were so good at naming you." Julie says as she opens up the package. “Let’s see you sent me…Tubbie Toast?” Julie announces pulling out the Tubbie Toast. "Ewe, it’s gotten all stale and moldy. And it smells like it has been baked by a sun with the face of an awkward baby and freaks in creepy costumes with man purses have licked it. You don’t want to know how I know what that smells like. What else did you send me?”
Julie says looking through the box and pulls out…A Justin Biber wig. “Ok I don’t know what I’m going to do with this.” Julie says sniffing it. “Ugh it smells like beavers, fan girls and an eighteen year old that hasn’t hit puberty. Am I going to have to smell everything because this is just rank. And isn’t his name Dustine Believer in this world because I know were going to meet Dustine Believer when we go to Antarctica. I read that on someone’s talk page. Yes, I read other people’s talk pages. And I know I’m not the only one.” Julie says giving a look at camera.
Julie pulls out more tissue paper till she pulls…out a grey dead tabby cat. “…” Julie says in a PJ moment. “Is this funny to you RTSF? Are dead pets funny to you? This pet could have been from an abused home or mill like the pets on the commercial with all the sad pets and sad music that makes us feel like bad people. For shame upon you, RSTF. …But this dead cat would look nice in the Justin Biber wig.” Julie places the wig on her dead cat. “Aw he looks so cute,” Julie says clapping her hands. “And has as much talent as the original! I’m going to name him Saint Pepper! Now let’s look at some other gifts.”
Julie grabs a large package with the number 80 on it. “Oh I wonder what is in here?” Julie asks scanning over the box. “It’s says fragile. What does that mean?” Julie shakes the box as stuff rattles in it. “It says it is from an amphibious video game player. Why does that sound familiar?” Julie rips the top of the box open and pulls put a jar of loose peanuts. “NO WAY!” Julie screams. THIS IS A JAR OF LOOSE PEANUTS! Julie hugs the jar. “…It’s really warm. That’s super creepy. Oh well, my peanuts are loooose. Now if only I had a short female red-haired rival.”
Then out of nowhere a short redhead walks by and yells at Julie “$$***!” Then walks off screen.
“Dreams really do come true!” Julie cheers. “But remember kids, your dreams will only come true if you sell your soul to TV and publicly shame yourselves on TV, destroying your dignity.” A, the more you know sigh appears above Julie. “So anyway, let’s see what else I got.”
Julie pulls out a Finn Hat. “No way,” Julie screams putting on her Finn hat. “This is like the Jewish Christmas I always wanted! Look how cute I am. Adventure time, c’mon grab your friends, we'll go to very distant lands. With Nellie the dog and Julie the psychopath, the fun will never end, it's adventure time! And we all know Nellie would be the dog. Have you seen that face? Anyway what else did I get?”
Julie pulls out more tissue paper and then… a small Rebecca Black doll. “Ewe, it smells like… I’m not even going to tell you what it smells like.” Julie studies the doll and comes across a string. “What does this do?” Julie asks as she pulls the string.
“…(Yeah, Ah-Ah-Ah-Ah-Ah-Ark) Oo-ooh-ooh, hoo yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah…” The doll sings horribly.
“Ah,” Julie screams. “It burns! I think my ears are bleeding. Someone kill it!” Julie begins beating the doll senseless with a random chair. Eventually the music stops.
“Is it dead?” Julie asks.
{C “…7am, waking up in the morning! Gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs, Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal!” The talentless doll sings in her high-pitched voice.
“DIE YOU HIDEOUS CREATURE!” Julie screams as she picks up an ax and begins slicing it.
“Seein' everything, the time is goin'. Tickin' on and on, everybody's rushin'. Gotta get down to the bus stop, Gotta catch my bus, I see my friends.” The doll sings getting louder.
“YOU HAVE NO FRIENDS YOU ABHORRENT SINGER!” Julie screams as she throws the axe off screen (a scream can be heard as she does) and picks up a chainsaw that she uses to cut through the doll.
“Kickin' in the front seat, Sittin' in the back seat. Gotta make my mind up, which seat can I take?” The doll sings even louder.
“You can take the seat next to Beelzebub…IN HECK!” Julie screams as she throws a lit match on the doll. “It's Friday, Friday! Gotta get down on Friday!” The doll still sings. “Everybody's lookin' forward to the weekend, weekend!”
“You won’t after your dead!” Julie screams as pulls some fuel on the doll, causing the fire to grow hugely.
“Friday, Friday, Gettin' down on Friday. Everybody's lookin' forward to the weekend.” The doll still sings.
“WHY WILL YOU NOT DIE?” Julie screams as she a firecracker at it. The doll explodes in many pieces and finally silences itself. Interns come in and put the fire out with fire extinguishers. Julie sits back down on the couch with next to the packages and Saint Pepper.
“Well that was a lot of violence for a kid’s show," Julie says picking up the box the thing had come from. “What is this?” Julie pulls a note out of the box and reads it out loud. “Hope you like the gifts. The Rebecca Black doll will sing if you pull it's string.” Julie sighs. “That would have been nice to know earlier. But the doll is rumored to be a voodoo doll and everything you do to it will happen to the real Rebecca Black…”
Julie looks down and the turn, beaten and smoldering remains of the doll.
“…Let’s open another package.” Julie says grabbing a purple box. “This one is from Julie huge fan. Aw, you’re a big fan of me? Or you’re an average fan who thinks I’m huge? Either way, I love the box!” Julie opens the purple box and pulls out…Mr. Coconut. “No way,” Julie says studying Mr. Coconut who has been stitched back together. “This is so cool! I don’t even want to know how you got this! Julie squeezes Mr. Coconut. “So what do you wanna say to the viewers Mr. Coconut?” Julie asks. She pulls Mr. Coconut to her ear as if he is whispering to her. “Oh gross, you perv,” Julie says. “You can’t say that on TV!” Mr. Coconut whispers in her ear again. “No you can’t do it on TV either! Let’s see what else I got."
Julie digs into the box and pulls out… a purple hoodie! “Oh my gosh,” Julie says. “I LOVE HOODIES!” Julie does a Katie/Sadie like squeal and puts on the hoodie. “Look how cute I am? In my fly hoodie and hot Finn hat. Dang, SG could not resist me in this. Not even Tsuyoshi’s bunny suit could challenge me in this outfit. I wonder what else is in here.”
Julie digs through the box and pulls out a letter. “NO WAY!” Julie screams. “It’s an adminship for Total Drama Island Fanfiction Wiki! Thank you so much Julie huge fan! I was very happy for everyone who became an admin because that deserved it. But I was a little annoyed no one even nominated me for an admin. But now I am one! So since I am a hoodie wearing, adventuring, dead cat dressing, coconut befriending, Rebecca Black murdering, purple, highly awesome/psychotic and modest admin with loooose peanuts, I’m the head admin, which means I have entire control of this wiki. My first rule as head admin is that everyone must write a story. And I have to be mentioned in a positive way. Two, everyone gets free tacos! And some third thing. Anyway, let’s open another package.”
Julie grabs a package marked with drawings of Julie dying. “This package looks like something that retirement home gave me. Those mean old people. Why must they hate us youngsters and our hip lifestyle. They’re just jealous they weren’t born in the modern era and can have a life on the computer. Anyway, this is from Julie hater. I’m not sure why a hater sent me presents but I’ll take them.” Julie opens the box and pulls out bag labeled itching powder. “So did you mean to put this in a bag? Either way I’m sure Nellie will love this in her clothes!”
Julie pulls out a vile of rat poison. “Aw now Saint Pepper can catch rats without working. You know because he is…afraid of live rats. And you also got me some…and a video?” Julie pulls out a tape marked The Best Ten Hours Of Nyan Cat.
“The best ten hours? I’d hate to see the worse." Julie says. But I can use this to ruin people’s lives. So thanks for all the really sweet gifts. Feel free to hate me more! So let’s up another one because that is all I do in this segment!”
Julie grabs another package with SG written all over it, in a stalker like matter. “And this is from IWantMySG15. I guess they like SG.” Julie opens the box and pulls out… a bag labeled a strand of SG’s hair. As imagined a strand of SG’s hair was in the bag. “Awesome,” Julie cheers taking the hair of the bag. “Thanks IWantMySG15! Ah it smells like a real man! Wonder if there are any other SG worthy things in here.” Julie pulls out a large book from the box.
“The Biography of SG: The Newest Teen Heartthrob.” Julie says reading the title of the box. Julie opens the book. “Wow. I knew a lot about SG but this is very in depth.” Julie flips through. “Oh he looks so smexy in that Ztar swimsuit. Oh is he in the shower!” Julie falls backward on the couch holding the book to her chest and a delighted (and somewhat pervy) look on her face. “I’ll have to read this more later. Let’s see what else is in here.
Julie pulls out a letter. “Aw, a letter for me? You should have. And you did!” Julie grabs Saint Pepper and Mr. Coconut close to her and begins to read the letter. “Dear Julie, I love SG. He is super hot, intelligence, cute, strong, brave and tapable along with his many other endless great features. You are an undeserving … excuse me! I can’t even read the letter out loud. Between all the ways you wish you could murder me and dispose of my body. I mean some of this is just nasty. And the other part is what you are going to do with your future lover SG after you kill me. I mean is some of this stuff legal? Cause if so…I might want to do it too. But really this letter is just wrong.” Julie scans through the letter and stops to read the last part. “In short, I hate you. You are the worse thing to ever exist and I will enjoy tormenting and murdering you and seducing SG who rightfully belongs to me. Then I’ll kill the other Fun Bunch members, the real ones not the teammates. Then I will…blank SG so…blank…. Ok I’m gonna skip this part. You know what IWantMySG15, you need a reality check and I’m going to cash it! You’re a freak. Get a life, even if you have to buy it from Creigh’s List. You’re a deluded psycho. SG loves me not your fat U-GLEE butt, sorry I mean face. It's just so easy to get those two mixed up. So go crawl in a hole and die you rotten piece of crap. You think this funny? What’s really funny is that your address is on this box. I’ll be sure to visit you. All right let’s open the last package.”
Julie grabs the last package on the couch. “This package is from the fan that gave you your last name,” Julie reads. “Aw, thank you for giving me such an awesome last name! And thank you for not giving me the last name of a crazed celebrity Julie Lohan, Julie Kardashian, Julie Cyrus, Julie Biber. Not as good as Noforthwal.” She opens the package and pulls out a wax doll of Dora the explorer and an electric hot plate. “Oh my Gideon, I know what this is! It’s a sorcerous ritual in which you melt the wax doll, which supposedly causes the person the doll is based off to melt. I learned that when I went to a sorcerer school for two weeks. Or did I go to Hogwarts? I remember one of my classmates was a teenage witch named Sabrina. I think I burnt her face off. Then I put it in a smore. Or did I burn her face with a smore? Eh, sorcerer school sucked. But thank you for sending me this!”
Julie starts the electric hot plate begins melting the wax doll. “That Dora girl was so creepy,” Julie says as she watches the doll melt. “Not to mention the reason I was eliminated. Besides my so-called friends betraying me. But did you guys hear Dora disappeared. The last time she was seen was on the show. Her parents are shocked at her disappearance. I can’t understand why though. You let her go where ever she wants unsupervised and she was last seen in a canyon heading down steep roads and filled with deadly animals. Not to mention she is a moron. I would hate to meet her again. But if I did, I would hope SG was with me. After all I know he would never betray me.”
Whispering can be heard from behind the camera as Julie looks off screen. “The crew wants me to make sure and clarify that I do not know who voted me off with Gwen and Noah," Julie states. “Not that I get why they would bring that up when I’m talking about SG unless of course SG voted…me off.” Julie turns to the camera.
“Did he vote for me?” Julie asks the cameraman. The camera nods. Julie is in a complete state of shock. “Why would he do this to me?” Julie looks back at the camera and realizes she is still on air. “Well, I don’t need him. He doesn’t realize what he has lost. Let’s just finish the segment,” Julie says though she is clearly fighting back tears.
She pulls a piece of paper out of the box. “What is this?” Julie whispers as she reads it. As Julie reads it a small smile appears on her face. “This is a really sweet song. Thank you."
thank you to all of you who sent me stuff," Julie says. "Except for you, IWantMySG15. I’ll being seeing you at your house tomorrow. But to the rest of you, except maybe Julie hater, I really appreciate all you’ve sent me and hope that your life is filled with prosperity, joy and free tacos. I hope to see you again.”
The scene changes back to the elimination room where the final barf bag is being given. “…
“…Trent.”
As Trent is tossed the final bag, Taylor stands up with tears in her eyes. She looks at Jovi in shock. “But you promised to vote for Trent? Why didn’t you?”
Jovi stands up. “I did vote for Trent,” Jovi replies.
“But I’m…”
“I voted for Trent,” Jovi replies. “But not everyone else wanted to. I wanted to keep you here…but the majority of the team-wanted to eliminate you. As a team captain it’s my job to what the team wants. But you’re my friend and I promised you I would vote for Trent. So I told everyone that I promised you I vote for Trent. But they could vote for whom they felt was best not who I wanted. I’m sorry Taylor but as a captain I was in a hard position. And I had to do what the team wanted.”
Taylor looks towards the other. “So you all voted for me?” Taylor asks.
“Sorry,” Courtney replies. “But you had cost us the challenge today and we felt like we had already given you a second chance back in Egypt. And your mood swings could have cost us more in the future.”
“I didn’t vote for you,” Rosamond clarifies. “I voted for Trent because Jovi did. I told her I would support her and I did.”
“Thank you two,” Taylor says, though she is still crying. “And I understand what you had to do Jovi. I’ll be rooting for you.”
Taylor waves goodbye as she grabs her parachute and jumps off the plane. Jovi sighs and sits down with Rosamond patting her on the shoulder.
Later Rhonda and Chris are shown in the front of the plane. “Well, that ends another exciting episode,” Chris narrates. “Join us next time on Total Drama What The Heck?”
Outside Jenny and Toby are still in the vulture's claws, flying towards the wing of the plane. "And don't forgot to see the aftermath next episode!" Jenny annouces. "And be sure that you have any questions you want to ask the eliminated contestants, to leave it in the talkpage unless you already have asked questions on a blog. Can't wait to see you!"
Then the vulture flies forward in the engine of the plane, leaving Jenny and Toby hanging on to the wing. "No Eileen!" Jenny screams.
"Eileen," Toby asks. "Why did you name her that?"
"Eileen was a good name!" Jenny replies angerly.
Chapter 7 Jenny and Toby's Bogus Aftermath
(Please know that some events happened after this chapter was posted, and is not meant to offend the dead.)
Aftermath opening
(Note: This is mostly showing clips from the previous episodes. Feel free to skip over it because you aren't missing anything).
A black screen is shown for a few seconds…
Suddenly a scene from Total Drama What The Heck appears on screen. It’s from the first episode, during the introduction of the new contestants.
"Ha, ha, you're funny," the strange girl mischievously says as she fake laughs and approaches Noah. "You know what else is funny?"
Noah rolls his eyes. "What?"
"When I torture you and your stupid soul in my chamber of murder!!!!!!!!!!! Then I'll blow you up! Then I'll laugh as no one comes to your funeral because NO ONE LOVES YOU!!!!!!!!!!!! But… I love you, Noah," she states as she pushes his face into her chest. "And I'll always love you. I'll marry you, and we'll move into a crystal dream fairy tale palace, where will ride magic My Little Ponies and play shuffleboard. And we'll have a hundred kids with names I won't take the time to remember. Then, will fly away on my jet into the moon, where we'll eat I Can't Believe It's Not Butter and watch Jersey Shore cause we're that awesome. Then… I die."
"Get off of me." Noah yells pushing her away.
"LOVE ME NOAH PUCKERMAN! LOVE ME! COWS MAKE MILK!!!!!!!!!" The girl cries out as she starts to tear up. "UGH I don't like you!" she screams at Duncan, as she kicks him in the nuts. She then angrily arm flails and yells gibberish.
"Glad to see you could make it, Julie," Rhonda states.
"You know I wouldn't miss this adventure for anything!" Julie replies.
The scene then changes to later in the episode, during the musical.
(Note this is written in script format for ease. Quotations mean there's talking)
Julie: This is gonna be crazy. That’s why it will be fun. I hope someone's mother dies! I hope random hobos cry! I wanna a pizza! Nothing rhymes with Pizza! I like to eat other people's toenails!
Rhonda: "This song fails."
Julie: Keep your chin up old bean! No need to get mean. Let's just fly away and wave our hair back and forth. Then wear pajamas! Then kill British llamas. Rhyming is hard. How does Lemmie do it? Oh well, who cares. Let's blow up Care Bears!
Nellie: "What is your problem?"
Julie: "I took some weird pills before I came here."
Mikey: This is gonna be so cool!
DJ: That poor fool.
Sierra: I wish Cody was here.
Julie: I wish Mody was here but I guess I'll settle for this deer! (a random deer appears)
Deer: "Moo."
Nellie: "Deers don't say moo." (The deer randomly jumps out of the window)
The scene then changes to the second episode, during the Amazon Race, during the monkey fight.
"Come on guys," Julie yells. "Lets teach these creeps they can't come to our home turf and not expect a fight."
"Didn't we come to their turf?" Nellie points out.
The three ignore her and make karate action poses. The monkeys launch forward, screaming their lungs off in fury. The three yell and spring forward. Sierra gives a fat one a roundhouse kick then throws one at two others knocking them off a tree branch. She then cracks the back of another yelling, "Eat that you dirty apes!!!!!!!!!!!"
Mikey jumps forward and punches one in the face. He then flips around and kicks another in the face. As he lands a monkey tries to sneak up on him, but Mikey pops his fist up and knocks the turd out. He then spits and screams, "Any of you other chickens wanna tango with Mikey!!!! Cause you don't want to…" A monkey jumps forward, lunging at Mikey. Mikey swiftly dodges and grabs him by his tail and flings the spider-monkey at a log causing his head to get stuck, "… cause I had tango lessons!!!"
Julie is busying screaming "KICK IN THE NUTS!" and proceeding to kick them in their nuts. Five monkeys come lunging at her, but she picks up the sack Nellie is in and bashes them with it.
"Still in here!" Nellie shouts.
Julie then flips onto a tree branch in between two monkeys. She quickly performed a spilt, knocking the two off as they scream. She then flips higher. Three monkeys lunge for her, but she only cackles crazily and grabs hold of a vine. She swings to the monkeys and BAM! She whoops them with the sack. "Take that Nellie!"
"I hate you, Julie!!!" Nellie screams.
"I love you, too!" Julie screams.
The screen changes to third episode where, The Fun Bunch are talking after a good night's sleep.
"Thank you so much for letting me use your computer, Julie," SG says, handing her back her purple laptop.
"No problem, Puddin," Julie says, taking back her computer and handing it to Sierra. "You didn't look at my Word documents, did you?"
"No," SG replies.
"What's on them?" Nellie asks, even though she doesn't really care.
"Oh nothing," Julie replies. "Just my alien master's plans for world domination. And my GROCERY SHOPPING LIST!"
The clip changes to in The Fun Bunch's kitchen LeShawna and Gwen are about to bake the cherry pie but feel it's missing something.
"Girl this pie will not wow those judges." LeShawna says.
"I agree with you," Gwen says. "It doesn't sound very tasty at all."
"How about we add a little something to give some wow," LeShawna suggests.
"I don't know," Gwen says. "Were suppose to follow the recipe."
"Trust me child I know what I'm doing," LeShawna replies.
The clip changes to the judging.
"Wow this is great!" Rhonda exclaims. "But I taste cinnamon. That wasn't in the recipe."
"Well, I changed the recipe up a bit," LeShawna confesses. "But it still tastes good doesn't it?"
"Yes, it does," Rhonda admits.
"Hey guys," Toby says. "I don't feel so good."
"You look in the mirror," Jenny teases.
"Oh shut…"
But before Toby can finish he faints to the floor.
Lindsay shrieks. "Ew he is swelling!!!" she exclaims.
"Jenny inject him with the EpiPen!" Rhonda yells. "His lungs are swelling! He's losing oxygen!"
The scene changes to the fourth episode where Julie is singing on the wheel.
"My mama told me after I came out of the microwave," Julie sings. "Act like a super star. Break the fourth wall, destroy everything you touch. And someday you will go far. Now in high speed chases well I'm hard to miss. The police follows everywhere I go. I point out all the problems in the plot...and steal spotlight from everyone on the show! I'm sure the story's critics will say I'm a grotesque display. Well, I'll bite them baby, I perform this way! I maybe flirting with SGs or hanging with Mikeys. Yes it means I' crazy, I perform this way! Perform this way! Oh the little monsters pay. Cause I send the mafia after them. Baby I perform this way!"
Then a scene from the fifth episode is shown, where the Fun Bunch are talking.
Noah didn't you say you speak a lot of languages?" Gwen asks.
"Not Spanish." Noah says.
"Hey guys?" Julie says.
"Yes you do." Sierra says. "I remember digging threw your trash and finding a Spanish test you took that was an A!"
"That was an old test from awhile ago." Noah says. "Besides, I'm not going to risk going home for this challenge."
"Guys!" Julie says.
"Sierra your name is spanish." Noah says. "Why don't you do it?"
"I don't know Spanish!" Sierra replies. "Hello?" Julie asks. "Anyone paying attention to me?"
"Well what about you SG?" Noah asks. "Your supposedly smart. Why don't you do it?"
"I don't know Spanish." SG says.
"Come on Noah go ahead and do it!" Mikey yells.
"I have something I would like to say!" Julie says.
"Do you know Spanish?" Noah asks.
"Well," Mikey says. "I had a neighbor who taught me a little Spanish but I don't know a lot." "Why didn't you tell us you knew spanish?" Noah asks.
"Are you done ignoring me yet!" Julie asks.
"Because I know only a little." Mikey says.
"No it is because you don't want to do the challenge." Noah says.
"So, you don't either!" Mikey states.
"Noah, if you know Spanish you should do it!" Sierra yells. "Don't you agree Julie?"
"If I were not a little mad and generally silly, I should give you my advice upon the subject, willy-nilly." Julie sings.
"Seriously Julie we need you to pick who is going." Gwen says.
"Should show you in a moment how to grapple with the question, and you’d really be astonished at the force of my suggestion." Julie sings.
"Answer the question!" Noah yells.
"On the subject I shall write you a most valuable letter, full of excellent suggestions when I feel a little better, but at present I’m afraid I am as mad as any hatter, So I’ll keep ‘em to myself, for my opinion doesn’t matter!" Julie sings.
"What are you going on about know?" Nellie asks.
"So it really doesn't matter, matter, matter, matter, matter!" Julie sings.
Then finally, a clip from the sixth episode is shown, were Taylor and Jovi are talking.
“Are you ok,” Jovi asks. “I was looking for you when I heard yelling and ran in.”
“Trent,” Taylor mutters in between her sobbing. “We yelled at each other. He has been using me to fill in for Gwen like my old boyfriend had done with me. And Gwen and Duncan broke up today. I was so sad and angry thinking Trent would leave me I lost control of my emotions and blew up at him. And it ended in a screaming match.”
Jovi hugs Taylor.
“It’s ok,” Jovi tells Taylor. “This can be worked out and everything will be fine. Come on lets go get a tissue.”
Jovi helps Taylor up.
“Wait,” Taylor says. “Trent also said he was voting me off tonight and everyone else will too.”
“Taylor,” Jovi says. “You…”
“I want you to promise me that you will vote Trent tonight,” Taylor says. “You can persuade the others to vote Trent and make sure I don’t go home.”
“Well,” Jovi replies. “I don’t know if I can…”
“Please,” Taylor begs. “Promise me you will vote for Trent.”
“I…”
“Please,” Taylor begs. “Do this for me?”
Jovi sighs. “I promise I will vote for Trent tonight.”
Then the screen changes to purple...
End of opening
The Aftermath 2.0
The screen appears purple…till a huge amount of colorful, firework explosions happen. The Letters, T, D,W, T, H, (and a question mark), appear out of the fireworks.
Large, silver letters slide next to TDWTH?, to spell out TDWTH? Aftermath.
Then even larger, gold letters appear under TDWTH? Aftermath saying, Hosted By Jenny (and under it in tiny bronze letters, and her sidekick Toby).
The screen finally changes to the aftermath studio, where Jenny and Toby are sitting on the aftermath couch. “Welcome,” Jenny says waving to the audience, “To the first ever Total Drama What The Heck Aftermath!”
The audience claps loudly and even a few whistles can be heard.
“I’m Jenny,” Jenny says, “And this is my stupid, butt-ugly sidekick, What’s His Face. And were your hosts of the aftermath!”
“Wow Jenny,” Toby says. “Great introduction.”
“Really?” Jenny asks.
“Nope,” Toby replies. “It was worse than your report card.”
“YOUR MOM!” Jenny yells back. “So anyway, we have a great show for you tonight. I’m here so we all ready know your going to vote these chapter five stars. But we have a lot of to her things for your enjoyment. We’re going to interview all the eliminated contestants, including everyone’s favorite, winner of the character competition, Featured Character for December 11, Purple haired mad maiden, Julie!”
An even larger amount of clapping is heard and screams of many things are said:
“I love you Julie!”
“Marry me Julie!”
“Derp!”
“I hate direct to DVD Disney sequels!”
“Bloop Pork!”
“SNOOKI!”
“Doyce!”
“But we have a lot of other things for you to,” Toby says. “We have our new segment, “What Talking Obese Animal Would…” We also have a special guest in our audience with us, Girl Scout Trope 909!”
Jenny and Toby walk forward to the edge of the stage, where an innocent troop of five-year-old girl scouts sit. “Is there anything you want to say to the audience,” Jenny asks a blonde haired girl scout handing her mike. “Go ahead sweetie.”
The little scout smiles and says, “Julie is a man in my wild fantasizes.”
“Ok you little freak of nature,” Jenny replies taking away the mike and moving back to the couch with Toby. “Somebody needs help.”
“Well I’m glad you know that you need it Jenny,” Toby says.
“SHUT UP YOU REROBATE!” Jenny yells angrily.
“Jenny,” Toby replies. “Using big words in all caps doesn’t make you a genius. And…”
“I really like pudding!” Jenny sings. “And cheese! A nun punched me once! She was also my neighbor! She’s dead now. I ate toast! Rock roll and Pop and Country! I wish Toby would go die in a hole! A really deep hole! Then I wouldn’t have to smell his feet. They smell like monkeys, melted butter and PEE! Like monkeys, melted butter and PEE! Monkeys, melted butter and PEE! MONKEYS, MELTED BUTTER AND PEE!”
“…Why?” Toby asks.
“Were also going to answer some questions our viewers sent in!” Jenny says.
The audience claps and cheers again.
“In fact let’s answer one right now!” Jenny says. She whistles and the vulture from last chapter drops a letter in Jenny’s hand and perches it’s self on the middle of the top of the couch. “You all remember Eileen from last chapter right? Thanks to a forgotten part of the chapter and fanlike, Eileen didn’t die in the plane’s engine like planned and will most likely becoming a recurring character.”
“Just read the question,” Toby says.
Jenny opens the letter, shows Toby and reads it, “Dear Jenny and Toby, why does it take so long for new chapters to be posted? From, the three to four people who actually read this.”
“Does that three to four people count Rhonda’s mother?” Toby asks.
“How rude,” Jenny says. “You know Rhonda’s mother is too classy read this crap.”
“Sorry,” Toby replies. “So to our readers, we’re wondering the same thing. We have a lot of theories that we’re happy to share with you but we can’t tell you the true reason. We have a hard time believing someone is this stupid and lazy to post chapters like this so we’re trying to figure it out.”
“We thought of stuff like that the author travels a lot or is in the witness protection program,” Jenny replies. “But if that was true this would be a cooler story. I think it could be the author is likely blackmailing someone to write chapters and has to wait to get them, which is why it takes so long.”
“I don’t get why it would take so long though,” Toby replies. “If the author is blackmailing someone, they would have the person they’re blackmailing write it faster. And they don’t have to wait with modern things like email.”
“Maybe the person they’re blackmailing doesn’t have internet,” Jenny says. “They write all the story on paper and the author types it up. And maybe me saying this is a secret way of the person getting blackmailed to get across that the author isn’t really writing this.”
“Have you read something like this?” Toby asks. “Do you really think the writer of this is that clever? And why would he have you read it? You’re so minor no one would pay attention to you.”
“YOUR MOM!” Jenny yells.
“Haven’t heard that one before,” Toby replies. “So you have anymore theories that would explain why the author takes so long?”
“Actually I do,” Jenny replies. “I think it may take awhile because the author is having trouble getting their drugs.”
“What?” Toby asks.
“I think the author is on drugs,” Jenny replies. “If you read this story it is pretty crazy. And I think the author has put in clever hidden messages that drugs are good and kids should use drugs and… oh hold on we need to go a commercial.”
The scene changes to a cool looking guy smoking who says, “Drugs are good and kids should use drugs.”
The scene changes back to the aftermath.
“So like I was saying,” Jenny says. “The author has hidden messages about how drugs.”
“I don’t see it,” Toby replies.
“Well I do,” Jenny replies.
“Well,” Toby says. “I hope our audience knows drugs are extremely bad and should never be smoked because they form addictions and will kill you and ruin your life.”
“I agree,” Jenny says. “So in any case, let’s continue with the aftermath by going to our new segment…”
“Hey!” a familiar voice yells off screen. “You forgot us!”
“Oh yeah,” Jenny says. “Let’s go talk to the characters not as an important as me, AKA, the non-returning contestants from the first seasons of Total Drama.”
Jenny and Toby walk over to a set of bleachers, where the non-returning Total Drama Contestants are sitting, minus four.
“Now before anyone says anything,” Jenny says. “Let us explain some things. If you remember after the finals, Ezekiel become a deranged animal, stole the money, fall into a volcano and was shot out of it. Then the remaining contestants swam into the water to escape, and a giant flaming boulder almost hit Heather. Well everyone was recused from Hawaii and the boulder missed Heather. Alejandro got trampled on a burnt horribly by the lava. Then Chris put him in a giant robot suit in an attempt to avoid a lawsuit. This has left Alejandro a little, unstable, so he has had to get some major help along with some physical rehabilitation, which is why he isn’t here.”
“Blaineley was also left to die on the island but was recused by natives,” Toby says. “Thankfully, she’s all healed now, and threatened to sue the show if we made her appear this season, which is why she isn’t here. She has gone on to do new things though, including becoming one of the hosts of the famous talk show, The See. She also has her own talk show in Washington called Blainerific. Both shows are actually produced by the new network that bought the rights to Total Drama and produced this new season. Also Ezekiel isn’t with us because he is getting help to reverse his feral state. And if you saw the second episode, you know why Izzy isn’t with us.“
“So now that we know who isn’t here and why they are not,” Jenny says. “Let’s talk to the other former competitors in our peanut gallery. First let’s talk to the person we hardly remember most, Eva!”
Jenny and Toby walk up to Eva and put a mike in her face. “How’s it going Eva?” Jenny asks.
“It sucks!” Eva yells. “I’m here at the aftermath for the third time and I never get to compete! The only thing that sucks more is the aftermath is now hosted by you blockheads!”
“That’s how I felt when I heard you guys would be here,” Toby says. “So how has life been since the end of Total Drama World Tour?”
“Nothing to interesting,” Eva replies with anger still in her voice. “I’ve been training more and been doing some car commercials. I’ve been on a few sports teams too. I also recently took a trip my homeland, of Germany.”
“Well that sounds fun and a lot more interesting then I expected,” Jenny says.
“Now let’s talk to two contestants who are about as memorable as Eva, Katie and Sadie! How are you two?”
“Were like so good!” Sadie replies.
“Oh My Gosh Sadie, I was gonna say that!” Katie says excitedly.
“No way!” Sadie says excitedly.
The two proceed to hug and squeal like usual.
“So you two are still as close as ever,” Toby says. “Anything exciting happen after Total Drama World Tour?”
“After we almost died in Hawaii,” Katie says. “We promised to keep our friendship intact.
“And to never fight about boys again,” Sadie adds.
“Well that rocks,” Jenny says. “Let’s check in with our favorite nerdy girl, Beth! How’s it going Beth?”
“Great,” Beth replies. “Me and Brady just got back from a trip around Europe. We’ve been spending tons of time together!”
“Glad to see your spending good quality time with your boyfriend,” Jenny says. “Now let’s talk to everybody’s favorite nerd, or previous favorite till Total Drama World Tour, Cody! What have you been doing?”
“Not much,” Cody says.
“Your boring,” Jenny replies. “In any case how are you and Sierra?”
“Were not together,” Cody says throwing his hands in the air. “We have become friends though. But were not together!”
“You still have the hot’s for Gwen?” Toby asks.
“Why?” Cody asks. “Has she been asking about me?”
“Well that answers that,” Toby says. “Now let’s talk to are other nerd, Harold. What’s up Harold, not that I really care.”
“I haven’t been the best recently,” Harold replies. “I’ve got kicked out of scouts and several camps after I unfairly switched the votes on Courtney.”
“You kinda deserve it though,” Jenny says. “Have you and LeShawna moved into your mother’s basement yet?”
“LeShawna hasn’t wanted to form a relationship,” Harold replies. “She still insists were just friends.”
“I really don’t care,” Jenny says. “Now let’s talk to the guy with the big butt and butt of the Total Drama’s potty humor, Owen!”
“Hey everybody,” Owen says waving to the audience.
“So how have you been Owen?” Jenny asks.
“Ok,” Owen says. “I won a lot of hotdog eating contestants and won money to help pay off the debt for the cheese cellar.”
“Great,” Jenny replies. “And finally, let’s talk to Tyler! How are things going Tyler?”
“Pretty well,” Tyler says. “I got a platinum membership card at my gym and some new equipment. I’ve been working really hard to become physically stronger to get on more sport teams.”
“Well I hope you do,” Jenny says. “Now I have to ask, are you bugged Lindsay has been falling all over this new jock? She doesn’t even remember who you are. How does that make you feel?”
“I don’t really care,” Tyler replies. “We broke up.”
Gasps are heard from the audience, along with the others in the peanut gallery and Jenny.
“Why did you guys break up?” Jenny asks.
“I dumped Lindsay,” Tyler replies. “Were just not compatible. I found her really pretty and hot but…we didn’t really have anything in common. I guess we just thought the other was attractive. But we didn’t really bond and I feel like our relationship wasn’t gonna go anywhere if it was just based on attraction. And… I befriended someone else who I liked a lot more.So I broke up with Lindsay as gently as could. But she got really upset. I didn’t tell her about the other girl I liked, but I feel she knew. We haven’t talked to each other since. And yes, I broke up with Lindsay before I asked out the new girl.”
“So you two are dating?” Toby asks.
“Yes,” Tyler replies sheepishly. “She’s really sweet and a great listener.”
“What’s her name?” Jenny asks.
“Maya,” Tyler replies.
“Well you two sound happy with each other,” Jenny says. “Do you know if Lindsay has really forgotten you or is just pretending?”
“I don’t have a clue,” Tyler replies.
“Thank you,” Toby replies. “Our peanut gallery everyone!”
An enormous amount of claps rise from the audience as Toby and Jenny make their way back to their seats.
“Now that all the casualties are done,” Jenny says. “Let’s really kick off this aftermath. And what better way then with dancing lobsters!”
Jenny points to a curtain but instead of dancing lobsters, all that is seen is a butter dish. “Where are my dancing lobsters?” Jenny asks.
The girl scouts hid lobster claws behind their backs.
“Why don’t we interview our fist guest,” Toby says. “He’s annoying, we all hate him and I’m pretty sure you to do, it’s Collin!”
Collin walks out in a geeky fashion with a creepy smile on his face and tries to run to over to the interview seat, but trips and falls face flat. Jenny and Toby both face palm, as booing can be heard from the audience.
“Hey guys,” Collin says. “I missed you.”
“I hate you,” Toby replies.
“I hate him more,” Jenny says.
“Don’t call my name, don’t call my name, Toby…” Collin says while giggling.
“HA HA HA!” Jenny laughs.
“I thought you hated him,” Toby says.
“I do,” Jenny replies. “But I hate you more. So anyway, Collin, you sucked! You were annoying, stalked Duncan, sang badly, got beat up and didn’t listen! Anything to say for yourself?”
“Wait, I was listening and stuff but…” Collin tries to say.
“Just stop,” Jenny says. “Anyway, I got to ask, why did you stalk Duncan? Why him and not someone else?”
“I wasn’t stalking Duncan,” Collin replies.
“You’re kidding?” Jenny asks. “You spied on him when he was with hid girlfriend, sang songs about and heck, we even have this clip of you following him to the confessional!”
Everyone looks up to a large TV and sees a clip of Duncan walking to the confessional. Behind him Collin is following giggling annoyingly.
“I can hear you!” Duncan yells turning around. “Why are you following me?”
“I’m not following you,” Collin lies.
“Then what are you doing then?” Duncan asks.
“Hey Duncan,” Collin says. “What would you do if you found out I was your new next door neighbor?”
“Why don’t I show you,” Duncan replies, grinding his fist into his hand.
The clip ends and Jenny has a smug grin on her face. “What do you say to that?”
“I was listening and stuff but…” Collin starts to say.
“Shut up,” Jenny replies. “Let’s just ask you some questions from the fans.”
Eileen brings Jenny a letter and Jenny reads it, “Collin, Why must you be an annoying moron? From Michael.”
“I’m not annoying,” Collin replies. “Everyone loves me!”
“No one loves you!” Toby yells. Many boos come from the audience.
“I know why you’re an annoying moron,” Jenny says. “Cause, baby, he was born this way!”
"Did you get that from off the internet?” Toby asks.
“YOUR MOM!” Jenny yells. “Next question please Eileen.”
Eileen brings Jenny another letter, which Jenny reads, “Collin, if you had another chance at the game, what you would do to not be eliminated again? From Bruno.”
“I would be super nice to everyone!” Collin replies. “And sing songs all the time so they wouldn’t vote me off!”
“Your such an idiot!” Jenny yells.
“Don’t talk about yourself like that,” Toby says.
“Let’s just end this,” Jenny says.
Eileen brings Jenny a letter written in red ink and Jenny reads it, “Collin, I was listening and all but why were you eliminated again? Collin's like a melody in my head, by the way! From Reddy.”
“I was listening and all but what was the question?” Collin asks annoyingly.
Jenny throws a brick at Collin’s head and he falls unconscious. Interns come and carry him away.
“So let’s talk to our next guest,” Toby says.
“Is it Julie?” Jenny asks.
“No,” Toby replies. “It’s our Sister With ‘Tude, LeShawna!”
LeShawna walks out waving while the audience is mixed between whispering and clapping (some half-hearted).
“Welcome to the Aftermath LeShawna!” Jenny says.
“It’s great to be here,” LeShawna says. “Well expect that I lost the money.”
“So LeShawna you managed to get even lower when returning for the fourth season,” Jenny says. “That’s suck huh?”
“Yeah,” LeShawna replies. “But I’m proud of how I did.”
“You mean make an alliance, almost kill Toby by not following the rules, get voted off with no help from a failed plan and be the second voted off and losing again?” Jenny asks.
“Are you just trying to insult me?” LeShawna asks.
“There aren’t many things to compliment,” Jenny replies.
“Let’s change the subject,” Toby says. “So what have you been doing since the end of Total Drama World Tour?”
“Well,” LeShawna says, “I’ve been helping kids on the streets on the community. I’ve also been doing a few more reality shows. I’ve been chillin with my home girls Jasmine and Leshaniqua.”
“How are you and Harold?” Jenny asks.
“Were just friends,” LeShawna replies.
“Though you weren’t on long I was wondering, is there anything you wish you could have done differently?” Toby asks.
“Probably not have put in that pumpkin spice,” LeShawna says. “Sorry about that.”
“It’s fine,” Toby replies. “Just almost killed me and all. I do have to know, what do you think has been the best moment of your Total Drama experience?”
“That’s hard to say,” LeShawna replies. “But one moment I’m really proud of is when I one the first merge challenge against Eva and won that trailer. We had a great party afterwards. I hate Chris destroyed it. I also enjoyed the spa trip and think I did really well in the cheerleading challenge, back in TDA.”
“Well thank you and all LeShawna,” Jenny says. “But that’s it for our questions. But some fans did send you in some questions. Let’s answer a few.”
Eileen brings Jenny a letter and Jenny reads it, “LeShawna, have you seen my glasses? From Zinc.”
“Um,” LeShawna says. “I haven’t seen them. I’ll... keep an eye out for them.”
“Next question please Eileen,” Jenny asks.
Eileen brings Jenny a letter written in red again and Jenny reads it, “LeShawna, do you regret playing too much of a strategic game this season? From Reddy.”
“I actually do,” LeShawna replies. “It’s what got me booted off. I guess I was just tired. Tired of doing worse each time, tired off putting up with people doing wrong things and getting far. Tired of not winning the money especially after my unfair elimination in TDI, tired of making mistakes. Tired of playing a game where I risk my life, put up with people I hate, where people who shouldn’t go get sent home and where no one seems to really win. That’s kinda why I fake cried to get that reward, I was tired. I tried playing a more strategic game so I could finally win. I know I needed an alliance and I tried my best to get a plan in motion but I guess I tried too hard. I thought that if I could just pull it off I could prove I’m worth something. I guess I was wrong. Still, I feel like if I didn’t try then the Fun Bunch would vote me of since they were so tight knit. Playing strategic seemed like the best option. I guess I just wasn’t to meant to ever win Total Drama.”
“Well you seem really depressed,” Jenny says. “In any case tricking SG into backstabbing Julie wasn’t really nice.”
“Oh no,” LeShawna says. “I didn’t tell Gwen to say that. I heard SG was a Gwen Fan and was the most logical of the Fun Bunch. I told her to try and convince him to vote off Julie because she was crazy and make a bad leader that would end up hurting us. The story she came up with, she came up with all on her own.”
“Well Gwen sucks,” Jenny says. “I love Julie!”
“Not as much as I do!” The blonde haired Girl Scout yells with lobster in her mouth.
“I heard you say the Fun Bunch would vote you off,” Toby says to LeShawna. “Do you mean all your team would vote you off?”
“My former team wasn’t the Fun Bunch,” LeShawna replies. “Julie, Sierra, Mikey, Nellie and SG were the Fun Bunch. Gwen, Noah and I were only members of the same team that got the name for ease. When you see Rhonda and Chris next tell them to not call the team Fun Bunch, it isn’t fair for the real Fun Bunch to be associated with people that aren’t really Fun Bunch members.”
“We will,” Toby says nodding to LeShawna.
“Let’s read another question,” Jenny says as Eileen brings her another letter, which she reads, “LeShawna, who do you want to win from this point? From Webly.”
“I’m not sure,” LeShawna says. “Honestly I want one of the original contestants from Total Drama to win. They’ve been in this game longer than these newbies, and I don’t think it’s fair for those of us who have been all worn out from doing this show over and over again to compete against people with more energy who will quickly ally with each other. As for who, I have a hard time saying. Gwen was my home girl, but the way she’s acting doesn’t naturally give me her support. So I think my other home girl from TDI, Bridgette. If not Bridgette, then maybe her boyfriend or Trent.”
“Thanks for your time LeShawna,” Toby says. “I hope the future is good to you. And you know that trailer?”
“Yes?” LeShawna asks.
“We have a new one for you,” Toby says. Toby points to a curtain, which drops to reveal a shiny new, trailer, better than her former.
“At the end of the show you can take it home with you,” Jenny says. "You deserve it!"
“Thank y’all,” LeShawna says with a small smile as more audience members clap then before. LeShawna gets up and goes to sit in the peanut gallery, next to Harold.
“Next,” Jenny says. “Let’s ask Rhonda some questions sent in from the fans.”
The audience claps as a member from the audience stands up.
“Excuse me!” The girl exclaims.
“Can I help you?” Jenny asks.
“I’m Rhonda’s number one fan, Amanda,” The standing audience member says.
“And your point is?” Jenny asks.
“I would like to meet Rhonda,” Amanda says.
“Good for you,” Jenny says. “I would like to be in a cooler fanfiction but we all don’t get what we want.”
“But I must meet Rhonda!” Amanda yells.
“Security!” Jenny yells.
“I will meet Rhonda!” Amanda yells running as interns come to chase her. She drops a smoke bomb and disappears.
“Freak,” Jenny mumbles.
“That’s what I was just thinking about you,” Toby replies.
“YOUR MOM!” Jenny yells.
“How original,” Toby replies.
“Just bring out Rhonda,” Jenny says.
Rhonda walks out and sits in the interview seat. “I’m so happy that fans actually wanted to asks me questions!”
“Yeah,” Jenny replies. “So let’s ask you one.” Jenny pulls out a letter and reads it, “Dear Rhonda, why is it whenever you leave a comment you have to include some kind of face. That’s stupid. You suck.”
“Who sent that?” Rhonda asks.
“Some kid,” Toby replies.
“Could we read another letter?” Rhonda asks.
“Sure,” Jenny says puling out another letter. She opens it and begins to read it in a southern accent, “Dear Rhonda, why do you traumatize children. P.S. Are you a man? P.S.S. Why do you hate America? P.S.S.S. You being on television caused my child to have a seizure. P.S.S.S.S. I like applesauce.”
“Why did you read that in a southern accent,” Rhonda asks.
“Because it sounded southern,” Jenny replies. “So answer the question!”
“Did you write these?” Rhonda asks.
“No,” Jenny replies. “But on an unrelated note, will you get me some applesauce?”
“You know…” Rhonda tries to say.
“Hey, hey Rhonda,” Jenny interrupts whispering.
“What?” Rhonda asks.
“Hey, hey Rhonda,” Jenny whispers.”
“Yes,” Rhonda replies.
“Hey, hey Rhonda,” Jenny whispers again.
“Just tell me,” Rhonda replies a little annoyed.
“Wanna know a secret?” Jenny asks.
“Sure,” Rhonda replies.
“Hey, hey Rhonda,” Jenny asks.
“What Jenny!” Rhonda replies.
“Wanna know a secret?” Jenny asks.
“I already said yes,” Rhonda says, annoyed.
“Guess what?” Jenny asks.
“What!” Rhonda yells.
“…I like applesauce.” Jenny replies.
“You do know I can fire you right?” Rhonda asks.
“And with that,” Toby says, “Let’s get to our new segment…
“What Talking Obese Animal Would…” Jenny and Toby shout in unison.
“In this segment,” Jenny explains. “The fans submit answers to a question that starts with the phrase “What Talking Obese Animal Would…” and we pick one answer to be done on the show. We asked fans, “What Talking Obese Animal Would…win in a fight against Rhonda and what would it want for Hanukkah? And the winner is… Fantasia’s hippo with the tutu, sent in from Jay!”
The audience claps as a humongous fat hippo wearing a tutu walks out on stage. “Hi everyone!” The hippo greets.
“Hi,” Jenny replies. “Know what do you want for Hanukkah?”
“I want a lighter or boxes of matches!” The hippo exclaims.
“Why do you want a lighter or a box of matches?” Toby asks.
“Well,” The Ballerina Hippo says. “I’m fascinated by fire because I live in the water. I also have to fight these noisy monkeys in the trees, and I thinking setting fire to a couple of branches to chase them away would work. I also need to clear a patch of prickly trees I don’t like.”
“Well I hope you what you want for Hanukkah,” Jenny says. “Now are you ready to violently beat that ugly frump in a fight?”
“You know it!” The Ballerina Hippo yells. The Ballerina Hippo twirls around before leaping forward and landing on Rhonda. A crackle (must likely Rhonda’s bones) is heard.
“I love where this is going,” Jenny says. Off screen Rhonda’s screams of pain can be heard.
{C}“Mazel tov!” The hippo screams as she perorates.As she perorates her foot repeatedly kicks Rhonda in the face.
“Oh snap that *bleep* is getting served,” The blonde Girl Scout says.
“That little girl really needs a therapist,” Jenny says.
As Rhonda screams of torture are heard a voice says, “Me and my loose peanuts would have made a better Talking Obese Animal. We’d make a Morbidly Obese Animal.”
“Arthur?” Jenny asks turning around.
Arthur takes off his face to reveal he is really…Dolph!
“Dolph?” Jenny asks.
Dolph takes his face off to reveal he is really…the Rhonda fan from earlier.
“That creepy girl?” Jenny asks.
“My name is Amanda,” Amanda says. “And I demand you show me Rhonda!”
Suddenly the Ballerina Hippo falls on top of Amanda, holding Rhonda’s hands by her hands.
“WOO!” The hippo giggles as she flings Rhonda into the wall.
“Now that was a great fight!” Jenny says. “Even if it did seem a little one-sided. Thank you Fantasia’s hippo with a tutu! And as a special treat we have a lighter and a box of matches for you!”
“EEEEEEEE!” The hippo squeals as she takes the matches and lighter.
“Happy Hanukah!” The Ballerina Hippo says as she leaves, revealing she has a squashed Amanda in her butt cheeks.
“Happy Hanukah to you too!” Jenny says. “Now let’s take a commercial break!”
Commercial break
(Note: You do not have to read these commericals. Theywere made for fun and to showcase my fandom. They may foreshadow but do not have to do with the story).
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A guy wearing a red shirt and glasses is shown. Cool, dramatic music played in trailers for good movie trailers is playing in the background and builds through out the trailer.
“I am not an average teenager.”
The scene shifts to a zoo where a class field trip is happening.
“Where are you going?” The guy with glasses asks a cool nerd at a zoo.
“To see the snakes.” The cool nerd replies.
The scene shows a tour guide was giving a tour.
“This snake is part of an experiment,” the tour guide pointed out. “It has been injected with a special serum that shifts its DNA.”
The tour walked away. Suddenly… the snake slipped through a hole in its cage.
“Like most stories, this one is about a girl. The problem is, I have no idea which girl.”
The scene shifts back to the two dudes. “So, what did you want to ask about?” The cool nerd asks.
“The dance.” The guy in the redshirt replies.
“Still choosing between Samantha and Panama?” The cool nerd asks.
“Actually, I was thinking about taking Maria.” The guy in the redshirt said.
“What?!” The cool nerd exclaims.
You can’t take Maria.” The cool nerd says. “It will ruin your friendship.”
“I know.” The radical dude says. “All three girls are awesome. God, send me a sign.”
Suddenly, the snake bit Michael and he fainted.
“If someone told you my life was a happy little story, somebody lied.”
The scene shifts to a hosiptial where the radical dude is waking up.
“What’s going on?” The radical dude asks.
“You were bit by a snake.” The cool nerd replies. “How do you feel?”
“Weird.” The radical dude says. “…But in a good way.
The radical dude spits on the floor. Suddenly, the floor dissolved.
“Venom.” The radical dude said. “Snake venom.”
The radical dude stuck out his tongue. Suddenly, it launched across the room and stuck to the wall.
“That snake must have given you powers.”
“I could be a superhero!”
“You can’t tell anyone about your powers. The bad guys may hurt your loved ones.”
“What bad guys?”
The scene changes to a lab in pieces. A man wearing a mask, flying on a hoverboard and holding a strange wand is cackling and yells, “First, Richmond Tech. Then, the world!”
“Why would I share this with the world when I can keep the power to myself?”
The scene shifts to the radical dude and a really sweet girl walking together down the street. They walked by a TV store. They stopped to watch a news report.
“In recent news,” the announcer said. “A masked man attacked Richmond Tech today. Killing Mr. Rodriguez and injuring Gary Richmond, the man uses a wand-like weapon to levitate and move his victims. The media has been calling him The Wonderful Wozard.”
“Wow.” The sweet girl says. “What a lame name!”
Staring:
Mounzer
Donald Crane
Billy Badonka
From the makers of The Life of Michael and Michael Meets Nalyd and Reddude comes the epic superhero movie of the year:
Maria started to lift his mask. Cobra Man grabbed her arm. She continued to lift it, but only revealed his mouth. She moved her lips closer to his.
....
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Were happy to be serving you cupcakes. And remember… always choose the purple cupcake!
End of Commercial Break
And The Show Goes On...And On..And On...And On
After the commercial break, Jenny and Toby can bee seen in their normal seat.
“And now,” Jenny says. “We have…”
“Hello!” A voice calls out. “The Voice is back!”
Walking out on stage is non other than, Whitney Houston!
“Whitney Houston?” Toby asks. “What are you doing here?
“I’m here for Weekend Update,” Whitney Houston replies.
“This isn’t…” Toby starts to say before Jenny whacks him on the head.
“Shut up,” Jenny quietly whispers. “With Whitney Houston our show we can attract a lot of old people viewers who might know her.”
“So Whitney Houston,” Toby says. “What brings you by?”
“Now who are you,” Whitney Houston asks. “Sorry but Mama has just had her thirdteen pinna-collate and she can’t even remember how she got here. All-Right!”
“I’m Toby,” Toby replies.
“Bobby B?” Whitney asks.
“No it’s To…” Toby tries to say.
“Is Bobby B here?” Whitney asks looking around. “Bobby B? Bobby Brown? Toby B? Toby Brown? Webly? Maya Rudolph?”
“No of those people are here,” Jenny says. “So I’m Jenny just so you know. Anyway, how have you been doing Ms. Houston?”
“I’ve been doing well,” Whitney Houston says. “I just talked to Miley Cyrus about doing drugs.”
“How did that go?” Jenny asks.
“How did what go?” Whitney asks.
“Talking to Miley,” Jenny says.
“What?” Whitney Houston asks.
“You just said,” Jenny tries to explain.
“All-Right!” Whitney sings.
“Ok…” Jenny says.
“How will I know,” Whitney sings. “if he really loves me! How will I know!”
“What?” Jenny asks.
“I need coke,” Whitney says. “And then a cola!”
“I’m starting to see those drug references you were talking about,” Toby says.
“My name is not Susan!” Whitney Houston sings.
“Well your segment is almost over,” Jenny says. “Anything you want to say before you go Ms. Houston?”
“I just want to give everyone some brownies!” Whitney says as she throws brownies at the audience.
“Please tell me there aren’t drugs in these,” Toby says sniffing a brownie.
“… TNWPJS,” Whitney Houston says as dances away.
“Well that was weird,” Jenny says. “Let’s introduce our next guest, Justin!”
The audience mildly claps while a few girls squeal as Justin walks out, striking poses before sitting down to be interviewed.
“So Justin,” Jenny says. “You…really didn’t do anything. How do you feel about being voted out?”
“I feel like Taylor deserved it more,” Justin replies. “But at least my face is safe here.”
“So what have you been doing after Total Drama World Tour?” Jenny asks.
“Mostly modeling,” Justin replies. “And a little work on the Total Drama Brothers. Were going to release a new single soon.”
“Your boring,” Jenny states. “Anyway, what has been your favorite moment of yours on Total Drama?”
“Either when I wowed people at the talent show or doing some Total Drama Brothers songs,” Justin replies.
“Well,” Jenny says. “I don’t really have anything else to say. So let’s read fan-mail.”
Eileen brings Jenny a letter and Jenny reads it, “Justin, You didn't do much or anything at all in the game, why? From Webly,”
“It was part of my strategy,” Justin admits. “I got kind of far doing nothing in Total Drama Island and probably would have gotten farther if it weren’t for Heather. In Total Drama Action my charms stopped affecting people and I think it is because I talked more. I thought being quieter and doing less would make me more attractive and more likely to ease by. Of course I wasn’t silent all the time, which might have been my undoing. I’m also doing a shoot for some new underwear, so avoiding damage seemed like a good idea.”
“Well,” Jenny says. “That’s all the questions we have for you. Justin everybody!”
Mild applause is heard with a few girls fawning and Justin goes and sits with the others in the peanut gallery.
“Well, now what?” Jenny asks.
“Now we interview you know who,” Toby replies.
“YES!” Jenny cheers.
Suddenly a redheaded intern walks on stage. She whispers to Toby and Jenny and then walks out.
“Well Julie isn’t here,” Jenny says.
The audience whines, with a few booing.
“So instead,” Toby says. “We’ll interview Taylor! Come on out here Taylor!”
The audience mildly claps as Taylor walks out looking very depressed.
“How is going Taylor?” Jenny asks.
“Horrible,” Taylor replies. “My boyfriend Nick cheated on me with my high-school rival Camilla and never really loved me and used me to fill the void while he waited on Camilla. Then I meet a nice person on the show but he just used me to fill the void and caused my elimination.”
“You know an ok would have been fine,” Jenny says. “And I don’t want your life-story either. And you didn’t ask me about how I am! You didn’t ask about my day! I HAVE AN INTERESTING LIFE! I DO INTERESTING THINGS! I READ A MAGIZINE! I EVEN FILLED OUT A PERSONALITY QUIZ! I CHOOSE GREEN AS MY FAVORITE COLOR BUT I THINK I SHOULD HAVE CHOSEN LIME GREEN! AND WHAT DOES COLOR EVEN HAVE TO DO WITH YOUR PERSONALITY!!!!!”
“I…I…!” Taylor mutters before bursting out into tears.
“Now you’ve done it,” Toby mumbles. “So Taylor, what was your favorite place to visit while on the show?”
“ I guess Paris,” Taylor replies. “It was nice. Even if it was… The City Of Love.”
“What was your favorite moment of Total Drama What The Heck?” Jenny asks.
“I guess in-between when we went to Mexico and The Outback,” Taylor replies. “I was the happiest I’ve been for awhile during that time.”
“That’s true,” Toby says. “One fan thought it would be interesting to see your life before the show and we want to see it as well. Would you mind if we showed some clips?”
“I guess not,” Taylor replies.
“Now let’s look at Taylor before the show,” Jenny says as a video comes on the big screen.
Words saying, Taylor age 5 appears on the screen. Then the screen changes to a five year old Taylor throwing chicken feed to little chicks.
“Here you go Eggbert,” Taylor says giving chicken feed.
The little chick cheeps as it eats the chicken feed.
“How you doing sweetie,” A voice of screen (likely her mother) says.
“Great,” Taylor replies happily. “These chickies are so sweet! And so cute! I wish I could pet them.”
“You can sweetie,” Another voice (likely her dad) says. “There are chickens.”
“YAY!” Taylor screams as she picks up Eggbert and snuggles him. “I’ll always love you Eggbert.”
“Cheep, cheep,” Eggbert cheeps.
The screen fades to black where the words, Taylor age 7, appear.
The screen then shows a seven-year-old Taylor ridding a brown pony, holding her daddy’s hand as she goes.
“Faster Cinnamon,” Taylor says petting her horse.
“Cinnamon?” Taylor father asks. “Why is his name Cinnamon?”
“Because he’s brown like cinnamon,” Taylor explains. “And sweet like it too.”
Taylor hugs Cinnamon’s neck and Cinnamon neighs happily.
The screen fades to black and the words, Taylor age seventeen.
The screen changes to a scene where Taylor is banging a bell. A digital clock says the time is four thirty in the morning.
“Ma, Pa, time to get up!” Taylor calls. “You slept in again!”
Taylor’s parents come out sleepy eyed, yawning.
“Come on we have a big day ahead of us,” Taylor says. “Summer is almost here and a lot of our goods will be going to the market! Pa you check on the crops, Ma you make breakfast and I’ll check on the animals.”
“Why did you always want to check on the animals sweetie?” Taylor’s father says with a chuckle.
“You know I love animals Pa!” Taylor replies.
Taylor walks by an old basset hound and stops to put her head.
“Morning Abigail,” Taylor says.
Ruffling noises can be heard off screen. Suddenly Taylor puts a dish full of dog-food in front of Abigail.
“Enjoy Abigail,” Taylor says as Abigail licks Taylor’s hand.
The scene changes to breakfast with caption saying it is now seven in the morning. A phone ringing can be heard.
“I got it!” Taylor exclaims. She leaves for a few seconds and rushes back. “That was Hannah, and we want to go to that new restaurant in town Saturday. May we?”
“What’s Nick doing then?” Taylor’s father asks.
“He has plans,” Taylor replies. “Helping his folks.”
“Good old Nick,” Taylor’s father says.
“He is such a good boy,” Taylor’s mother says.
“He is,” Taylor says lovingly. “I couldn’t ask for a better boyfriend. But I would like to see the restaurant. Can I please go?”
“Oh, ok,” Taylor’s father says. “I mean, what could it hurt?”
The video ends and the camera focuses back on the stage, where Taylor is sniffling.
“So Taylor,” Jenny says. “Why don’t you have a southern accent?”
“What?” Taylor asks.
“Never mind,” Jenny says.
Suddenly the redheaded intern walks on stage and whispers in Jenny and Toby’s ears. She then rushes off stage.
“Well we were just informed of some exciting noise,” Toby says.
“Is Julie here? The blonde haired Girl Scout asks.
“No,” Toby replies. “But we can now have aftermath video guests because our interns have finally set up our video chat.”
“And it looks like we have a few guests who want to talk to Taylor,” Jenny says.
“So we’ll meet them and the answer some fan mail,” Toby says. “Sound good?”
“As long as I get paid,” Jenny replies.
“I wasn’t talking to you,” Toby says. “Let’s just meet video guests. The first is a girl named whose name is actually Taylor tpp.”
A girl in her room appears on the screen. Her room is coated in Dustine Believer stuff.
“Hi I’m Taylor Taylor,” the girl on video says.
“Hey Taylor Taylor,” Jenny says. “So what did you want to ask Taylor?”
“Taylor?” Taylor Taylor asks. “I thought Dustine Believer was on this show!”
“He isn’t,” Toby replies. “Now do you want to ask a question or not?”
“Ok,” Taylor Taylor says. “So Taylor, would you make out with Dustine Believer?”
“No,” Taylor replies.
“Good,” Taylor Taylor says. “BECAUSE HE’S MINE!”
“Dustine Believer’s music sucks,” Jenny says.
“No it doesn’t!” Taylor Taylor screams. “It’s awesome, just like his hair, and eyes and naked body probably is. And you’re just jealous. And…”
The screen suddenly goes to static.
“Oops,” Jenny says. “It looks like we lost Taylor Taylor.”
“Not that anyone cares,” Toby says. “The readers were probably getting confused with our Taylor Taylor not only having the same name as Taylor but also that Taylor Taylor has the same first and last name.”
“Thanks for explaining the whole joke,” Jenny says sarcastically. “Anyway let’s talk to another video guest who calls herself, The Fangirl.“
Amanda, in a bathroom stall, pops up on screen.
“I must meet Rhonda!” Amanda yells.
“Is that the bathrooms in the hall?” Toby asks.
“Interns!” Jenny yells as the redheaded intern and a group of following interns rush off to find Amanda.
The big screen fades to static and is turned off by Jenny and Toby.
“So was that it for my video guests?” Taylor asks.
“Yup,” Jenny replies. “Now lets answer some fan mail and be off with you.”
Eileen brings Jenny a letter and Jenny reads it, Taylor, Do you trust any guy you come across? From Scope.”
“Well,” Taylor says, “I do tend to be wary around guys after the breakup, because I tend to fall in love too soon and be too trusting. I tired to be less wary after Trent helped me, but I guess that was my mistake.”
“Well that is all your fan-mail,” Jenny says. “Your just as boring as Justin, you filler character. Taylor everyone!”
The audience claps a bit more than before as Taylor awkwardly leaves the interview seat and sits in the peanut gallery, next to LeShawna, who offers her a seat.
“All-right,” Jenny says. “Now we see Julie!”
The audience claps wildly, as a redheaded intern walks on stage and whispers to Jenny and Toby.
“Never-mind,” Jenny says. “She’s still not here.”
“What The Heck?” The blonde haired Girl Scout screams.
The audience boos too.
“In the meantime,” Jenny says. “Were going to conduct an interview with a friend of one of the currently competing contestants. This friend has been mentioned a few times this season and is a friend of one of the well-liked new contestants on the show. He’s a blonde boy, he plays baseball on a team with a contestant, he joined her book club, he likes her cat face pancakes, and he is a teenage detective, give it up for Rosamond’s friend Nate!”
The audience claps loudly as some whisper amongst themselves.
A tall, boy walks out on stage. He is attractive, with short blonde and brown eyes. He is wearing a yellow polo shirt, long khaki pants and brown sneakers. However, he is wearing a long, brown, unbuttoned, trench coat and matching hat, like he is dressed as Sherlock Holmes. He sits down in the interview seat.
“Welcome Nate,” Jenny says.
“Hello Jenny, Hello Toby,” Nate (the boy in the interview seat) replies. “It’s great to be here.”
“It’s great to have you here,” Toby says. “So we know that your and Rosamond’s friend, Annie, has been informing you on what’s been going on while you work on solving mysteries in your neighborhood. What has she told you?”
“Well,” Nate says. “Annie has informed me of how Rosamond’s doing. I’m so glad she is still in, not that I had any doubt. She’s also informed about Rosamond’s new friend Jovi and all about Team Indestructible to me. She has also told me who was eliminated.”
“Anything about the alliances or challenges?” Jenny asks.
“She told me who the former contestants were,” Nate replies. “She’s a Total Drama nut. She has also told me about The Bulldogs, and how a lot of them are bad guys. She’s also mentioned where the challenges have been. But she didn’t go into detail about the challenges or gameplay.”
“Interesting,” Jenny replies. “Anyway, how have your cases been going?”
“Good,” Nate replies. “Believe it or not, I’m out of cases to solve. I’ve solved everyone and have been out of cases for four days now.”
“Well great detective work,” Jenny says. “So do you have a girlfriend or secret crush or something?”
Nate blushes. “No I don’t,” Nate replies embarrassed.
“Are you sure?” Jenny asks. “Because I’ll be happy to play Truth Or Anvil again.”
“What?” Nate asks.
“Ignore her,” Toby says. “So how close are you and Rosamond?”
“Were great friends,” Nate replies. “We hang out a lot, we play sports together, and we found each other funny. We’ve been that way since childhood. Though I do admit I found her strange as a kid. But now I’m use to it.”
“Well do you know that Rosamond has mentioned you on the show?” Jenny asks.
“Yes,” Nate replies. “Annie has told me about how Rosamond has told memories from her childhood about us. I’m very flattered she mentioned me.”
“Well we have to wrap up this segment,” Jenny says. “Any last words before our time is finished?”
“I just want to wish Rosamond good luck,” Nate says. “I know she can do it!”
“Thank you Nate,” Jenny says. “You can just take a seat in that chair near the peanut gallery.”
Nate turns his shoulder to see a few interns dropping off a chair next to the peanut gallery.
“Thank you,” Nate says as he goes to take his seat.
“Well the show is closely reaching ending time,” Jenny says. “But we saved a lot of time for this event! Now put your hands together for the infamous, psychotic, fourth wall defying, fanfiction loving, featured character worthy, purple, nut…Julie!”
The audience claps and cheers wildly waiting for Julie.
But, a redheaded intern comes out on stage instead.
“If you still want a job you better not tell me Julie isn’t here,” Jenny yells.
The redheaded intern backs away offstage.
Jenny sighs and says, “Well where the heck is…”
Suddenly, Julie busts through the wall driving a purple monster truck, with exploding fireworks coming from it. Julie swerves the giant beast of truck and stops it.
She cartwheels through the windshield and on to the stage, before striking a pose of victory.
The monster truck then proceeds to explode, sending an array of fireworks out which explode in a grand display.
“So did you like my entrance?” Julie asks.
And Still Goes On...And On...
The audience claps wildly as Julie waves to them. The blonde haired Girl Scout seems to be having a spasm.
Julie isn’t wearing her normal outfit like usual. She seems to be in some costume. Her long hair is unbraided and wild and messy and, because her hair so long, it reaches the floor. She has violets scattered in her hair as she walks around barefoot. She wears a long, flowing dress, which seem to be stitched together from various cloths and has no sleeves.
Julie bows to the audience, and takes her seat in the interview chair.
“It’s great to see you two again,” Julie says. “I’m not too late am I?”
“It’s great to see you again Julie,” Jenny replies. “And you arrived at just the right moment. Were really happy to be interviewing you. Not that were happy you’re eliminated of course.”
“Hey it’s ok,” Julie says. “I mean I had a good run, made a few laughs and made some good friends. But this place is really cool too. All these wonderful people happy to see me! Makes me feel like I’m a celebrity or something.”
“Well we can’t wait to interview you,” Jenny says. “We got a lot of fanmail asking you questions so were going to try and incorporate it in with our interview. Anything you want to say before we begin?”
“Actually there is,” Julie says. “I love yellow labs named Shane!”
The audience claps wildly.
“So Julie,” Jenny says. “Mind telling us about your costume?”
“Not at all,” Julie replies. “This costume is the outfit Mad Margaret wears in the comic opera Ruddigore or The Witch’s Curse, by the talented duo Sullivan and Gilbert. I have some interest in opera. And someone, my fourth wall father, sent me a letter containing this song that was sung by Mad Margaret. And I absolutely love it!”
“He gave you that during your segment last episode right?” Toby asks. “It was the letter of that song that made you smile right?”
“Yes,” Julie replies. “It’s a wonderful song.”
“So Julie,” Jenny says. “Let’s talk about your big win. You won the first character competition. How does it feel?”
“Fantastic,” Julie replies. “I appreciate every vote! I feel so loved. Maybe the author is doing something right with this story.”
“The author isn’t,” Jenny replies. “If they were, I would be in more scenes. The author probably just used blackmail or threats to get you to win.”
“At least I won,” Julie replies mischievously.
“Can we get Taylor back out here?” Jenny asks. “She at least shows up on time.”
“At least I appear in more episodes,” Julie replies smirking. “I even got my segment just so I could appear in the last episode.”
“You are the…” Jenny starts to say.
“So Julie,” Toby says. “You managed to beat Kendall in the Character Competition. You feel proud?”
“Very,” Julie replies. “But I don’t think Sprink took it well.”
“Why’s that?” Toby asks.
“Well,” Julie replies. “…Just roll the footage.”
Suddenly a video begins playing on the monitor screen.
“Where did we get this footage?” Jenny asks, whispering to Toby.
Toby shrugs.
As the footage plays it shows Julie leaving a grocery store… carrying a full-size stuffed SG doll. “Come on children!” Julie calls. Behind her are two children follow her, both about the same age (what appears to be five years old) but different genders.
“Mommy,” The little boy asks Julie. “What are we gonna do after this?”
The little boy is wearing a mini version of SG’s orange shirt and jeans but also wearing a mini version of Julie’s cat belt. He has his hair in the style of SG’s hair but has the same color hair as Julie. He has SG’s eyes however.
“Were going to go play in traffic sweetheart,” Julie replies.
“Sounds fun!” The little girl replies.
The little girl is wearing Julie’s skirt and shirt but is wearing a mini version of SG’s glasses. She has her hair in the same style as Julie’s hair but has SG’s hair color. She has Julie’s eyes however.
“Hey Mommy,” Julie’s son says. “Why did you have kids?”
“The same reason anyone has kids,” Julie replies. “To use them to win featured Quote. Now win Mommy’s love and get me a Featured Quote.”
“Sprinklemist!” Julie’s son yells nervously, throwing sprinkles.
“Ravioli Pixie!” Julie’s daughter yells nervously, throwing ravioli.
“Well,” Julie says. “You were as subtle as a sledgehammer and as clever as this story’s plot. But, I’ll accept it, for now. But you have much to learn.”
Suddenly, a glittery pink taser comes flying, shocking Julie. Then Julie is rammed into an RV by…Stevie?
“What’s going on?” Julie asks.
“Doyce!” Doyce yells as he grabs Julie and squeezes her so she can’t escape.
Suddenly a group of Sprinklemist characters surround Julie.
“Well if it isn’t miss crazy,” Hedda says. “We have a bone to pick with you.”
“Is this about me cheating in bingo?” Julie asks.
“No,” Hedda replies. “This is about you winning the character competition.”
“Oh,” Julie says. “I was afraid someone had linked those deaths back to my Bingo.”
“Your boyfriend as your stuffed doll?” Fiona says. “Way to copy my idea.”
Fiona lights the SG doll on fire.
“No!” Julie screams. “Not in front of the children!”
“No need to worry about your children,” Hedda says. “Sprink’s superior writing skills and admin powers have turned your kids into watermelon.”
Zane takes a bat and smashes the watermelons that were Julie’s children.
“Sorry to make you feel watermelon-choly,” Zane says.
Julie busts out of Doyce’s arm and rushes forward to the crushed watermelon but is pounced on by a panther. Sky Lynn smirks from behind.
“Sky Lynn?” Julie asks. “Gosh, everyone is here. When is Blair going to pop up?”
“She isn’t,” Sky Lynn replies.
“Blair never gets to show up,” Julie says sadly. “So Sky Lynn do you like Creigh?”
“No,” Sky Lynn replies. “Were just friends.”
“Are you sure?” Julie asks. “Cause you would look so cute together!”
“Silence!” Hedda yells. “We have a bone to pick with you. You beat Kendall in the Character Competition.”
“It was voting,” Julie replies. “I didn’t do anything.”
“I don’t care,” Hedda replies. “If you ever try to compete against any Sprink character ever again, you’ll end up like Lemon.”
“Who?” Julie asks.
“Exactly,” Hedda replies. “Let’s go!”
The Sprink characters hop in a large black van drove by Sheena and Priscilla.
They leave Julie alone with the ashes of her doll that was her husband and her crushed watermelons that were her children. Julie is confused, sad and a little fearful. She has only one question, which she screams out at the leaving black van.
“So are Creigh and Sky Lynn going to hook up or what?”
The video ends and the camera focuses back on the stage.
“Wow,” Toby says. “Are you going to press charges?”
“No,” Julie replies nervously. She looks out in the audience where a guy wearing shades and wearing a cool shirt, stares at her.
“I think it’s best to ignore it,” Julie replies then proceeds to gulp.
“Ok,” Jenny replies. “Let’s move on to a different subject. Let’s answer some fanmail!”
Eileen brings Jenny a letter written in red ink again and Jenny reads it, “Hi Julie, I happen to be a psychotic crazy too! Wanna be pen pals?! :D (XD I'm so lame :P). From Reddy.”
“How did you read the smiley faces?” Toby asks.
“YOUR MOM!” Jenny replies.
“Of course!” Julie replies. “I love chatting with fellow nuts! I’ll send you a letter right away!”
“Don’t you need his address?” Toby asks.
“Silly Toby,” Julie replies. “I know everyone’s address! Plus it’s on the letter.”
“Next letter please Eileen,” Jenny says.
Eileen squawks and hands Jenny another letter, which Jenny reads, “Julie, What was the first fanfiction you've ever wrote? Which TDI character do you think your most like? From Webly.”
“Great thought provoking questions,” Julie says. “As for your first question the first fanfiction I ever read entirely was when I was younger and I have blocked the entire thing out of my memory because it was super nasty. It was really badly written too, maybe this author wrote it too. As for the first fanfiction I read on Total Drama Fanfiction Wiki, it was Legacy. It was a great story.”
“Speaking of great stories,” Toby says. “Have you read Total Drama Fairytales? It’s really funny and clever but still has good twists and a compelling plot. The authors rock at it.”
“It reminds me of another great story on here,” Jenny says. “Total Drama Idiots. I adore that story. It’s very funny and has a lot of great characters. Yet it has been very shocking and intriguing.
“I have read those,” Julie says. “And I love them! I would give them my seal of approval, if I had a seal. But I only have a walrus. But you should read those stories.”
Julie winks at the camera.
“Stupid self-advertising,” The blonde haired girl scout mumbles.
“As for which TDI character I’m most like,” Julie says. “I’d have a tough time giving you an answer. A lot of people would think I would say Izzy, but I feel were very different, not to speak ill of the presumed dead. I think Izzy and me are different in how funny we are, me using fourth wall jokes and cute flirting, her switching personas as the only thing she did in all of TDA. Again, not to speak ill of the presumed dead. I don’t think I’m that like the others either. If I had to pick a canon contestant I’m most like I would pick Sierra because we both crazy awesome, have purple hair and fall in love too fast. But she wasn’t from TDI. So it’s hard to pick. I think I would pick Lindsay, not that I’m an idiot, no offense to the presumed living, but because we both beautiful, sexy, can be excitable, and fall in love too fast too, since she hooked up with Tyler in three episodes. Plus were both very liked by the fans since she really didn’t go through a crazy personality change in TDA or TDWT.”
“Long enough explanation,” Jenny says.
“Well unlike you, people care about what I say,” Julie replies mischievously.
“You want to go little miss Mary Sue?” Jenny teases.
“I’m going to shove those words right up your…” Julie replies.
“So,” Toby interrupts. “Let’s answer some more questions.”
Eileen brings Toby a letter, which he reads out loud, “Julie, Why are you considered fearless? From Michael.”
“I guess because I do crazy and reckless stunts,” Julie replies. “And because my page says I have no fears.”
Eileen brings Toby another letter, which he reads out loud, “Dear Julie, You are awesome! How did you get that way? From Frank."
“I was born this way,” Julie says. “Although I did get more awesome from reading fanfictions and my exciting world travels.”
“World travels?” Toby asks. “You travel the world?”
“Yeah,” Julie replies. “I just end up one place and go another. I’ve been all around the World, and Burbank. I’ve meet many people. I’ve fought sharks with lasers, escaped evil scientist laboratories, performed on live television, nursed a sick polar bear cub back to health, was the priest at a wedding for giraffes, and sat through a time share presentation. There isn’t anything I can’t do.”
“And your so modest about it,” Jenny says.
“Oh Jenny,” Julie says. “It’s so petty to be jealous of me because your life sucks.”
“I’ve traveled all around the World and Burbank too,” Jenny replies. “Me and Toby have all sorts of crazy adventures too and go where ever the wind takes us. We’ve been in haunted houses, stopped cattle wrestlers, won a soccer championship and delivered a pizza in thirty minutes or less. I bet you’ve had to travel all alone, always being alone. At least I had a sidekick. Tell me, have you gained any boyfriends during your travels?”
“Yes,” Julie replies annoyed.
“How many do you still have left?” Jenny asks. “And how many of them dumped you?”
Julie looks down at the ground.
“Ok,” Toby says. “Let’s ask another question.”
Eileen brings Toby a letter, which he reads out loud, "Dear Julie, why is Gwen so horrible and cruel? From Frank."
“Gwen is awesome!” Cody yells.
“I think Gwen has just lost it,” Julie says. “Maybe her boyfriend has been a bad influence on her or she is just lost it. But I know Gwen is in trouble, especially with Sierra and Nellie there.”
Eileen brings Toby another letter, which he reads out-loud, "Dear Julie, what exactly is your relationship with Nellie? From Frank."
“I love all these questions Frank,” Julie says. “I know I can be a little mean, but I tease. Sierra, Nellie and I are like an abusive family, except funny. And Nellie does enjoy our company, since misery loves company.”
“The theory on Fanfiction.net is your and Nellie are secret lovers,” Jenny teases.
“At least I can get a lover,” Julie replies.
“Guys just stop,” Toby says. “We don’t have enough time for a cat fight. Eileen please hand me another letter.”
Eileen brings Toby another letter, which he reads out loud, “On a scale from 1 to 10, how hot do you think SG is? ;D From Shadowgeoff .”
“Hmm,” Julie says thinking. “I’d have to give an 8 or 9. I don’t eve give 10s though.”
“So does this mean you still like SG?” Toby says.
“No,” Julie replies sternly. “I do not like SG. Were over, plan and simple. I had a one sided crush on him but I don’t feel anything for him anymore. I don’t really care about him betraying me anymore either. Just because you don’t like someone doesn’t mean there not hot.”
“So you aren’t depressed about the breakup?” Toby asks.
“It wasn’t a breakup,” Julie replies. “It was my one sided crush on him, which is over. I was sad at how he hurt me but now I’m over it. Its all in the past. Does that mean I’m willing to make up with SG? No, I still dislike him. I’ve just gotten over my feeling of being rejected and dumped.”
“Really?” Jenny asks. “Because there are actually some clips I want to show that the audience hasn’t gotten to see. Memorable events between you and your Puddin.”
“I prefer you didn’t,” Julie replies intimidatingly but with a small bit of nervousness in her voice.
“But we wouldn’t want to disappoint our fans would we?” Jenny mocks.
The aftermath audience whines in protest of being refused.
“Come on Julie,” Jenny says. “If you’re really over SG you won’t mind. Unless of course your lying.”
“I’m over that jerk,” Julie replies. “Roll the clips already. What are you waiting on Hanukah?”
“If you insist,” Jenny says mockingly. “Now we all know SG and Julie’s so called romance. But here are three clips that I really felt describe Julie. The first is from the Amazon challenge, during the race.”
Everyone looks toward the big-screen, except Julie who looks away sadly.
The screen shows the rainforest, with large towering trees of green foliage everywhere. Beautiful, purple butterflies flutter about. A few flutter off the ground as Julie cartwheels through a bush, followed by SG, Mikey and Sierra, with the latter two carrying the sack Nellie is in.
Julie stops cartwheeling and looks at the rest of the Fun Bunch. “You guys need a break?”
“Yeah,” Sierra says. “I’m still tired from fighting monkeys.”
“That’s ok,” Julie says. “I’m a little tired myself, though most of it is from Nellie’s complaining.”
“I’m being abused in a sack,” Nellie replies from the sack. “I don’t think you would be too peppy if you were in my position.”
“Oh Nellie,” Julie says. “How selfish can you be? Here you are complaining when people are dying from things such as mango worms.”
“I told you about mango worms,” Nellie says from inside her sack.
“I’m going to go up the tree and see if I can find the Amazon River,” SG says meekly before climbing up a large tree.
“I’ll join you,” Julie says scurrying after him.
Julie climbs on a large branch before SG and opens her arms out as the wind blows through her hair.
“It’s beautiful isn’t it?” Julie asks as SG climbs up with her.
SG mumbles something shyly and looks for the Amazon River.
“I’d give up on finding the river,” Julie says teasingly. “We aren’t coming in first. After how long it took Sierra, Mikey, Nellie and I to fight the monkeys I knew we weren’t. And since you weren’t any closer you won’t be getting there any sooner. And with Rosamond and Jovi’s head start we aren’t faring any better. ”
“So you’re giving up?” SG asks.
“No,” Julie replies. “I’m enjoying the adventure. When you watch a movie or read a book about treasuring hunting, it’s not about finding the treasure that makes it special as much as it is the journey. The journey is what you remember and what makes memories. And happy memories are the real treasure. This is my third time to the Amazon and not a single moment has been dull. I’m still smiling as I explore, I’m still laughing as I’m going and I’m still stunned at the things I get to see.”
Julie motions to the view from the tree as the camera pans the breathtaking, indescribable view. SG’s jaw drops as he looks at the view. Julie laughs, and SG blushes a little but smirks.
“So you travel a lot?” SG asks.
“Yes,” Julie replies. “I’ve done so many amazing things and seen so many wonders.”
“Must be fun,” SG says.
Julie sighs. “It usually is. But…it can be really lonely.”
“Do you travel alone?” SG asks.
“I try not,” Julie replies glumly. “But somehow I always end up alone. I don’t know why, I try to be nice but I guess I’m just unlikable.”
“No your not,” SG says. “You’re a very fun, wild, free spirited person who has a good heart. I believe that, and I haven’t known for twenty-four hours! You were kind enough to take me in when I was alone, and I appreciate that very much.”
“Thank you,” Julie replies blushing.
“So is that why you joined the show?” SG asks.
“I love a good adventure,” Julie replies.
“Not for the adventure,” SG says. “To travel with others.”
“That’s the major reason,” Julie says.
“Is there another reason?” SG asks.
Julie blushes and says, “Yes, but you’ll think it’s dumb.”
“I won’t, try me,” SG says.
“…I also joined to find love,” Julie replies bashfully. “I heard a lot of stories of people finding it on reality shows and I hoped I could too.”
SG chuckles.
“I know you would think it was dumb,” Julie says sadly.
“No, no,” SG says apologetically. “I think it was really sweet. I mean, we all want someone who will love us and care for us and we can be happy. Just the way you mention how so many people find love on reality shows reminds me of some fanfictions. I know nerdy.”
“No,” Julie says. “I love fanfictions, particularly Total Drama fanfictions.”
“You love Total Drama Fanfictions?” SG asks enthusiastically. “Me too! I even have written a couple.”
“Really?” Julie asks excitedly. “Would you mind sharing your writing with me.”
“Well,” SG says somewhat sadly. “There kind of personal and…” He stops and stares at Julie who understands what he is going to say and frowns.
“Yes,” SG says. “You can.”
“I thought they were personal?” Julie asks.
“They are,” SG replies. “But… I can trust you to read them.”
There two faces get a little closer…
“Hey,” Sierra calls from down below. “You guys ready.”
“I guess,” Julie says. “But you guys should come see this view! It’s amazing!”
“Like I can see anything,” Nellie replies.
“We’ll let you out of the sack,” Julie says. “Besides were almost there. I found where were suppose to meet.”
“You did?” SG asks.
“Yup,” Julie replies pointing. “But a lot of people are already there.”
“Oh well,” SG says. “We can enjoy the view.”
The screen fades to static and the camera refocuses on the aftermath stage.
“Wasn’t that sad,” Jenny says. “So romantic but in the end, useless.”
“I could care less,” Julie says trying to be strong but with an obvious sadness in her voice.
“Well then let’s watch this clip of our strong heroine/role-model the day after the cooking challenge,” Jenny says.
The screen shows SG typing on Julie’s computer.
Julie rushes up to SG. “Hey SG,” Julie says. “Want to go explore the plane with Nellie, Mikey, Sierra and me? It will be really fun.”
“No,” SG replies. “I’m doing work.”
“Your on Chatango posting links to YouTube parodies of famous songs,” Julie says.
“I just don’t feel like it, sorry,” SG says.
“Oh, ok,” Julie says.
Julie walks off with her head down.
“Did he want to join us?” Sierra asks as she and Nellie rush up to Julie.
“No,” Julie replies still walking off.
“Oh well we can still have fun,” Sierra says.
“I won’t,” Nellie says.
“I don’t want to go anymore,” Julie replies. Julie walks into the girl’s shower room (the one rarely seen). Her two friends look at each other for a few seconds and rush in.
The see Julie looking at herself in the mirror.
“Do you think…it’s my appearance?” Julie asks.
“What about your appearance?” Sierra asks.
“Do you think my appearance is why SG doesn’t care for me?” Julie asks. “Maybe if I looked more like Lindsay he would notice me. If I had blonde hair instead of lavender would he see me? And if I traded in my discolored eyes for baby blue eyes would he pay attention to me? If I was some kind of supermodel would he…would he like me?”
“Julie,” Sierra says as steps into view of the mirror. “I know how you feel. When I was on here with Cody here I asked the same questions. If I were shorter or more developed would he want me? If I had different colored hair like…teal would he find me desirable? Would I ever be enough for him? …I don’t want to go.”
Sierra sniffles and looks at herself in the mirror too.
“Quit with the pity party,” Nellie says. “A lot of other people are more deserving of your sympathy like soldiers whose faces were blown up. That’s a problem, not the color of your hair. Who cares if those two don’t like you?”
“You wouldn’t understand,” Julie says.
“Your right,” Nellie says. “I don’t. This is stupid.”
Nellie leaves the shower room and finds Mikey.
“Are they coming?” Mikey asks jumping up and down.
“No,” Nellie replies. “There too busy wallowing in their misery because Cody and SG might not find them attractive.”
“Well that’s dumb,” Mikey says. “There both really good-looking.”
“Really?” Julie asks as she and Sierra stick their heads out of the door.
“Yes,” Mikey says blushing. “Your both really attractive. Not that I’m trying to date you.”
“We understand,” Sierra says. “But if we are good-looking then why don’t they notice us?”
“Maybe they’re just not able to see what’s right in front of them,” Mikey replies.
“Maybe it’s our personality,” Julie says. “Maybe I’m not smart enough for SG. Or I’m too crazy.”
“You guys are awesome!” Mikey says. “I have tons of fun with you. It’s all right. Just give it time, and I’m sure those guys will be all over you! Just let them figure out what they’re missing. In the meantime, let’s have fun!”
“Yeah!” Sierra says.
“Woo!” Julie screams as the three run off with Nellie following.
The screen fades to static as the camera refocuses on the aftermath stage. Julie is hanging her head in shame.
“Well you gave it time,” Jenny says. “And he rejected you.”
“I don’t care,” Julie says, but the tone in her voice clearly shows she is lying.
“Well then let’s watch one last one,” Jenny says. “This takes place a day after the Egypt trip, when your team had won the pool as a reward. Let’s see what happened between you and your ex Puddin.”
Once again a video starts while Julie puts her head in her hands.
The scene shows The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice in first class, except for Julie.
“Where’s Julie?” Sierra asks. “It’s getting late.”
“We should go find her,” Mikey says.
“You go ahead,” Gwen says. “Me and Noah will stay here in case she comes back.”
Nellie and Mikey rush off.
“You coming SG?” Sierra asks.
“Yeah,” SG says glumly. “I’ll go look for her the other way.”
Sierra nods and runs off while SG walks the other way.
Later, SG opens the door to the pool and finds Julie floating in the water.
“Julie?” SG asks. “Why are you in here? We spent all day at the pool. Everyone’s looking for you.”
“Oh sorry,” Julie says climbing out. “I was just enjoying the water. I love swimming, makes me feel so free and high-spirited. When I’m down I just like to swim.”
“Why are you down?” SG asks.
“…Are you upset?” Julie asks.
“Why?” SG asks.
“You just seem down,” Julie says. “I just came here to think if there was a reason I caused it or I could make you feel better.”
“I’m fine,” SG says. “Come on, let’s go.”
“Ok,” Julie says wrapped in a towel. “But if your not, you can tell me. You know that right?”
“I know that,” SG replies.
Once again, the screen fades to static, and the camera refocuses on the aftermath stage. Julie is clearly depressed.
“You sure you ok?” Jenny asks.
“I’m over SG,” Julie yells.
“Good,” Jenny replies. “Because I think I might have found a few more clips and I think…”
Julie angrily punches Jenny in the face and knocks her to the floor unconscious .
“Oops,” Julie says angrily. “My arm spasms are acting up.”
“It’s all good,” Toby says. “In any case, we have a few more questions and then we’ll take a question from the video audience and then we have a special surprise. So let’s get another letter. Eileen, could you please.”
Eileen brings Toby a letter which Toby reads, “Julie, What background are you from? From Scope.”
“Well I’m not a background character,” Julie says. “So it’s hard to say.”
“I think he means about your past,” Toby replies.
“Well my past was the previous chapters of Total Drama What The Heck so he can read them if he wants to know,” Julie replies.
“We got use electric shock to get you to talk,” Toby replies somewhat annoyed.
“I’d probably enjoy it,” Julie replies.
“Fine,” Toby replies. “Next question Eileen please.”
Eileen brings Toby a letter, which Toby reads, “Julie, who are your real parents? Do you has a family? What you would do if Rebecca Black were at your house? xDD From Bruno.”
“Well,” Julie says. “My real parents aren’t real since this is fanfiction.”
“He means who are your parents,” Toby says.
“My parents are a centaur and Fluttershy,” Julie replies.
“No they aren’t,” Toby says.
“Ok you caught me,” Julie says. “I’m really a box of Fruit Loops that have been transformed into a human. That’s why I’m so loopy and colorful.”
“Well that kinda makes sense,” Toby says. “That’s not true.”
“You don’t know that,” Julie replies. “Anyway, if Rebecca Black was at my house I would probably do the same thing I did to the voodoo doll.”
Eileen brings Toby another letter, which Toby reads out loud, ”Julie, Do you have any brothers or sisters? Do you get along? Are they as hyper as you? Are they older or younger than you? Are your parents hyper, too? Any pets?”
“Actually,” Julie says. “I have many siblings. One of my parents goes around having tons kids to make an army. And soon, all of their children and all their children’s followers will unit to takeover the world! Then will make a musical about it and it will be on Broadway! And it will get ok reviews!
“…” Toby says in a PJ moment.
“And I do have some pets, Saint Pepper and Mr. Coconut!” Julie says pulling Mr. Coconut and Saint Pepper the dead cat out. “I love my babies!”
“You didn’t even answer all of those questions!” Toby yells. “Why are you so crazy?”
“As one of my great relatives said,” Julie says. “I don't suffer from insanity, I revel in it!"
“Why won’t you tell us where you are from?” Toby asks angrily.
“People are always bugging me for my origin,” Julie says. “If I’m going to have a past, I prefer it to be multiple choice! Beside I’m a crazy girl. So it’s just better if we don’t know.”
“That kinda makes sense,” Toby says.
“How!” Eva yells.
“Well that is all the fanmail,” Toby says. “Now let me ask you some questions. What was your favorite place to visit?”
“Probably the Amazon,” Julie says. “I met my best friends there and had fun. And it is very breathtaking.”
“Julie,” Toby says. “Do you think you’ll come away from this with good memories?”
“I don’t know,” Julie says. “I don’t think I can and my time here at the aftermath hasn’t helped.”
Jenny gets up from the floor.
“All right your done here,” Jenny says.
“But we said we let her talk to a video guest,” Toby says.
“Fine,” Jenny says. “But hurry!”
Toby rolls his eyes as a group of people wearing purple shirts with Julie’s face on them appears.”
“Hi,” one of the guys says. “Were the Julie/Fun Bunch Fan Club and we were wondering if we could have Julie sing a song.”
“I’d love too,” Julie says smiling. “This song is a song a fan sent me and the song my costume is based off of. And I really like it.”
Ruddigore 17 Margarets Ballad
Julie's fanmailed song (Thanks to Gideon for introducing me to/giving me the idea to use this song).
The redheaded intern carries out a microphone stand while Julie hands here info. Julie starts singing her fanmailed song…
Margaret’s Ballad:
To a garden full of posies
Cometh one to gather flowers,
And he wanders through its bowers
Toying with the wanton roses,
Who, uprising from their beds,
Hold on high their shameless heads
With their pretty lips a-pouting,
Never doubting—never doubting
That for Cytherean posies
He would gather aught but roses!
In a nest of weeds and nettles
Lay a violet, half-hidden,
Hoping that his glance unbidden
Yet might fall upon her petals.
Though she lived alone, apart,
Hope lay nestling at her heart,
But, alas, the cruel awaking
Set her little heart a-breaking,
For he gathered for his posies
Only roses—only roses!
Julie finishes the song with tears of sadness in her eyes.
The audience and the video guests clap. “That was…” The video guest tries to say before the clip is turned off.
“Oops,” Jenny says. “In whatever case, your interview is over and you can go sit in the peanut gallery.”
Julie says nothing and walks off to the peanut gallery sitting alone.
“Well the aftermath has reached the end,” Jenny says. “But before we go…everyone in the audience gets free cupcakes! Courtesy of Purple Cupcakes! Remember, always pick the purple cupcake!”
The audience murmurs excitedly as interns bring everyone a cupcake.
“And don’t worry peanut gallery,” Jenny says. “Me and Toby will give you each a cupcake as well.”
The two grab trays given to them by an intern and let the peanut gallery choose their choice of cupcake. Eva picks a blue cupcake and Beth picks a green cupcake. Tyler picks a red cupcake and Cody picks a purple cupcake. Owen tires to grab many off Jenny’s tray but Jenny gives him the first one he touched, a blue cupcake. Justin doesn’t want a cupcake and looks at himself in the mirror. Collin takes a green cupcake and LeShawna takes a yellow cupcake. Harold, seeing LeShawna take a yellow cupcake, does the same. Katie grabs a pink cupcake and Sadie grabs a purple cupcake. Julie is about to take the last one off Toby’s tray, a pink cupcake.
“Oh no,” Sadie says. “Me and Katie don’t have the same color cupcake!”
“It doesn’t matter,” Cody says. “It’s not like the colors make a difference.”
“You want the purple cupcake Julie?” Sadie asks.
“Sure,” Julie replies as she takes Sadie’s cupcake and Sadie takes the pink one. Jenny notices and mumbles something.
“Do you have a cupcake I can have?” Nate asks.
“Um sure,” Jenny says as she showing Nate her tray, which has one last cupcake, a purple cupcake.
Nate takes a purple cupcake and starts eating it.
Toby gives Jenny a nervous look but she dismisses it.
“Well,” Jenny says. “That’s the aftermath. Tune in for the next episode of Total Drama What The Heck? Whenever the next chapter is posted.”
Chapter 8 The New Three's Company
A red carpet event somewhere in Hollywood, with many famous people. Limos pull in and out dropping off celebrity after celebrity. Out of a white limo comes a handsome male in a tux as white as the limo, that goes with his blue eyes and blonde hair. People scream his name as she struts down the red carpet and strikes poses for the flashing cameras. A tall, curvy woman steps out of the white limo wearing a red dress and designer jewelry. She too has blue eyes and blonde hair. People scream her name as she signs a few autographs, blows a few kisses and elegantly walks down the runway. Another woman gets out of the white limo. She looks like the other two before her with blue eyes and blonde hair, but is younger and wears a pink dress and carries a matching designer purse. She waves to the chorus of fans screaming her name, but she focuses mostly on the cameras.
Then the audience glances over to the white limo and began booing. The new arrival does not look like the other three. Crumpled paper balls are thrown at the newest guest. The audience starts throwing trash and even a Mountain Dew hits the new arrival, staining their outfit.
The audience scream hurtful names to this person.
“Animal,”
“Circus Freak,”
“Epic Fail!”
The cameras harshly flash their cameras at the person, calling it names and poking it like it’s an animal in a cage.
“You’re a disgrace to your family!” A voice yells above the crowd.
The person looks ahead at the three people from the white limo and their expressions confirm what the voice yelled is true. Yet the tormented arrival knew this.
A leg in the audience sticks out from behind the ropes and trips the person. They fall forward into…
…A pile of mud. The person looks up to see they’re in the Amazon.
Snickering can be heard from behind them.
The person turns to see a group of people in the shadows pointing their fingers at the person.
“What a freak,” one voice says.
“Talk about a maggot,” another voice says.
“You might walk better if you weren’t so lopsided,” yet another voice teases.
“It would need to lose some of that weight first,” The last voice says. “If it actually can.
The shadows light up to reveal the figures are Duncan, Chef Hatchet, Bradley and Heather.
“I’ve seen some stupid and ugly kids on this show,” Chef Hatchet says. “But you take the cake.”
“If you hadn’t already eaten it,” Duncan teases.
“Look at it,” Bradley says pointing. “It’s begging to cry. Just like a little baby. It’s as weak as it is fat, ugly and clumsy. Do you want your mommy little baby?”
“Like its mother could love such a creature,” Heather says. “Why don’t you do us all a favor and jump out of the plane?”
The person looks around and sees they’re now in the plane they’ve been riding. The person stands up and dusts of their Mountain Dew and mud stained outfit… but a wild panther jumps out of nowhere and pounces on them, knocking them to the ground.
Duncan, Chef, Bradley and Heather stand there and rub their hands together evilly as the ferocious panther growls…”meow”.
Barbie opens her eyes to see Rosamond's smallest cat (Coraline) clawing at her spider earrings. Barbie looks toward the window above her to see a small amount of warm sunlight generating from it, indicating it was late morning or early afternoon.
“Coraline?” Rosamond calls.
Coraline lets out a small meow and Rosamond and Jovi enter to see Coraline on Barbie.
“There you are,” Rosamond says relieved as she scoops Coraline up in her arms and snuggles her. Coraline purrs happily. “Don’t do that again,” Rosamond says. “I heard there are a lot of weird things on here and with your small size you would make a tasty snack for Chris’ circus of monsters. I hope Coraline didn’t bother you Barbie.”
Barbie doesn’t say anything and sits up, still taking in her surroundings.
“Wait,” Jovi says. “Why are you in loser class when your team won first class?”
Barbie doesn’t reply, she just gets up and walks away slowly, turning a corner and leaving off-screen.
“Poor Barbie,” Rosamond says. “She was probably hiding out her from her team."
“I remember how The Bulldogs almost lost in France for picking on her,” Jovi recalls. “And with jerks like Heather, Chef and Duncan on there I doubt she’s having a good time.”
“So Barbie is different,” Rosamond says. “They don’t have to be a jerk about it. People are who they are whether you like it or not, and you just have to accept it.”
“You’re preaching to the choir,” Jovi teases. “If only people were as insightful. Come on, let’s get Coraline something to eat.”
Jovi pets Coraline who purrs happily. The two contestants and their feline friend leave.
The scene changes to the cockpit of the plane, where Chris and Rhonda are.
“Last time on Total Drama What The Heck,” Chris narrates. The Fun Bunch was still devastating at the loss of Julie and SG and Mikey were revealed to have voted her off, causing Sierra and Nellie to claim revenge. Gwen felt guilty for her actions and got in a fight with Duncan, ending in a breakup. Rosamond gave SG help with why he didn’t trust Julie and surprisingly, Courtney helped Gwen when she found her crying.”
“Later,” Rhonda continues. “We landed in the Outback. The contestants, cooked shrimp, threw boomerangs, faced crazy sheep, played a game practically like basketball and raced with kangaroos. In the end, The Bulldogs won for the first time and Team indestructible lost. Taylor had returned to her former state of sadness and her Trent became enemies. Taylor had her new friend Jovi promise to vote Trent, which a majority of Jovi’s team members were against. Jovi was stuck between doing what’s best for her team and keeping a promise to a friend. Julie also had her own mail segment and found out SG voted her off. “
“In the end,” Chris says. “Jovi did vote for Trent while she let her teammates vote for who they wanted. Taylor was eliminated but understood Jovi’s decision and sadly left.”
“And we had an awesome aftermath!” Jenny yells as she and Toby put out from under the control tables. “We interviewed the losers, had talking obese animals, and Julie even sang! And we passed out Chekhov’s guns…err cupcakes!”
“What will happen next on Total Drama What The Heck?” Chris finishes.
(Theme song plays)
The scene changes to somewhere in the economy section where Nellie and Sierra are.
“You know,” Sierra says. “While this plane is like the original it’s so much bigger they were able to make a much larger economy section.”
“Focus,” Nellie says. “Were working on our revenge plan remember?”
“Sorry,” Sierra replies. “Just kind of never noticed much of the Total Drama Jumbo Jet. Guess I was too busy with my precious Cody. Anyway, our plan hasn’t worked well. We’ve been putting bugs in Gwen’s food, placing thumb tacks on her seat, and tripping her, but it isn’t big enough.”
“Agreed,” Nellie replies. “Gwen’s a jerk and needs a hard hit.”
“Um sorry to interrupt on the Drama,” Jenny says as she walks in. “But we got this letter from a fan in the Aftermath for Nellie and we thought we would give to you.”
Jenny hands Nellie the letter and walks off-screen.
“What does it say?” Sierra asks.
“Nothing,” Nellie replies. “It’s not like it’s the answer to end cancer or stop AIDS.”
Sierra snatches the letter and reads it out loud, “Dear Nellie, how do you persevere in such a terrible world? Is there something that gives you strength, or do you just think the alternative is even worse? From Gideon. So…are you going to answer the question?”
“Why?” Nellie asks. “You curious?”
“Actually, I am,” Sierra replies. “Just a little bit. You find everything depressing, so why have you not…”
“Killed myself?” Nellie replies. “I don’t think it’s something that really matters. The world is still horrible and awful. Answering this question won’t fix the problems.”
“Well,” Sierra says. “Answer it for Gideon. Maybe you could be helping him.”
“How am I helping him?” Nellie asks.
“Just answer it,” Sierra says.
“Fine,” Nellie says. “To answer you and Gideon, I find the alternative to living isn’t helping either. It doesn’t change anything and killing myself will likely only cause more problems for people, which I don’t want to cause. So basically, everything’s hopeless.”
“Is there something that gives you strength like Gideon asked?” the ex uber fan asks.
Nellie sighs. “Not really,” Nellie says. “Maybe because I don’t want to place the burden on my family.”
“Why don’t you ever talk about your family?” Sierra asks.
“I don’t have much to say,” The sad girl says. “Why so many questions?”
“Can you ever look at the glass half full?” Sierra asks.
“Doesn’t matter how I look at it,” Nellie replies. “It still makes me think of someone getting drunk, driving and causing a car wreck.”
“Is that all you see?” Sierra asks.
“No,” Nellie replies. “I also see the car producing exhaust that will cause lung cancer.”
“Fine,” Sierra replies. “Be negative.”
“I answered the question,” Nellie replies.
“Yes,” Sierra says. “You did it…”
“We did it, We did it, We did it, Yay!” The familiar voice of a little girl sings, mysteriously from nowhere.
“What was that?” Sierra asks.
“I don’t know,” Nellie says. “But I think we should leave.”
“Agreed,” Sierra says as the two walk away. “Now then, about our Gwen problem, I have a big plan…”
The scene changes to first class, where the Bulldogs are enjoying themselves for the first time.
Chef is getting a back massage by an intern and Heather is drinking a smoothie while DJ and Duncan are on computers with Cosmic River napping near by and Lindsay and Barbie are nowhere to be seen. Bradley walks in and sits down at the bar next to Heather, grinning like the Cheshire Cat.
“You seem content,” Heather says.
“I am,” Bradley whispers. “Things are going swimmingly.”
“So your date with that idiot went well?” Heather asks.
“Do I detect a hint of jealousy?” Bradley asks.
“No,” Heather replies. “I just don’t like Lindsay. You haven’t figured that out yet?”
“Oh, I’ve figured it out,” Bradley replies.
“Well,” Heather says. “I can’t wait till you break up with her and we vote her off.”
“I don’t know,” Bradley teases. “I might keep her.”
“Yeah right,” Heather says. “So what was your date like?”
“Well…” Bradley says.
*Flashback* Lindsay and Bradley are eating at a table alone in the dining room. A romantic mood has been set with candles lit dimly and violin music playing from a tape in a radio. The two are eating their reward for winning the last challenge, an Australian feast.
“You having a good time?” Bradley asks.
“Yes,” Lindsay replies. “Are you?”
“Of course,” Bradley replies.
“Bradley,” Lindsay says. “Do you think I’m pretty?”
“Of course,” Bradley replies.
“Do you like pretty girls?” Lindsay asks.
“Of course,” Bradley says. “I’m eating dinner with the prettiest girl I have ever dated.”
Lindsay blushes and the two continue to each their date…
*End of Flashback*
“It went well,” Bradley says. “Lindsay is a good girlfriend.”
“If you like a girlfriend as dumb as a sack of hammers,” Heather replies.
“Just admit it,” Bradley says. “You are jealous.”
“As if!” Heather yells loudly. Everyone turns around to look at her. Heather stomps madly away. Heather hears a noise and looks down at a bug.
“Stupid insect,” Heather says as she prepares to stomp on it.
“Wait!” Cosmic River yells. He jumps up and grabs the creature. “That was a close one. You almost stepped on this tomato worm. Poor cat probably accidently got trapped on here.”
“Who cares about a stupid little worm?” Heather asks.
“Now don’t go ape,” Cosmic River says. “These groovy little guys turn into sphinx moths. Sphinx moths can hover just the same as hummingbirds and their far out long tongues drinking out of the fluted flowers look just like little beaks. They're only about an inch-and-a-half long as moths, so it's hard to distinguish characteristics man. They help the earth by fertilizing the flowers, same as butterflies and hummingbirds. That just one of the reasons we should save caterpillars. You dig?”
“The only thing I want to dig is my foot in that gross little bug,” Heather replies. Heather walks off angrily.
“Well that wasn’t very hip,” Cosmic River says. “Come on little tomato worm, lets see if we can talk Rhonda into finding you some nice digs.”
Cosmic River leaves with tomato worm in hand. Duncan gets up and says, “I’m going to get some fresh air.”
He walks off, and everyone goes back to their business. Suddenly DJ stands up. “I got to go to the can.”
DJ rushes off and Bradley smirks.
“Chef,” Bradley says. “Watch the door.”
“Why?” Chef asks clearly upset is massage is being interrupted.
“Because I’m going to get DJ to join our alliance,” Bradley says walking off to the DJ’s sleeping bunny and the bunny’s bowl of carrots.
“What are you doing?” Chef asks.
Bradley pulls out a bottle of rat poison. He tilts it to look like it has been split into the bowl of carrots. He places a chocolate bar near the bowl of carrots.
“What The Heck?” Chef says standing up and dismissing the intern.
“Calm down,” Bradley says. “Know in a second when you see DJ coming we’ll pretend to be doing our own business and make a loud noise to wake up the bunny. DJ will see the rat poison and panic. Then us, prepared since we know what happens, will rescue the bunny. And the chocolate bar near it will let us frame Barbie for the deed!”
“What if we don’t rescue the bunny?” Chef asks.
“Then we can use the bunny’s death to get DJ to join,” Bradley says. “Either way we’ll have DJ wrapped around our finger. He has gotten over his grief with you and he completely trusts me.”
“So you don’t care if the bunny dies?” Chef asks. “I mean DJ’s such a marshmallow it would kill him.”
“What do you care?” Bradley asks. “Besides you run over animals and then cook them.”
Before Chef can reply, he hears DJ’s footsteps and looks out the doorframe to see him. “He is coming,” Chef says.
Bradley smirks and he and returns to the smoothie bar, drinking some of Heather’s smoothie. Chef sits back down and picks up a magazine to read.
“Vogue? Really?” Bradley asks looking at the cover of Chef’s magazine.
DJ walks in while Bradley slams his smoothie onto the table, which wakes up DJ’s pet. The bunny walks up to the bowl of carrots.
“Hey,” DJ says. “How’s it…Bunny!”
Chef springs up and grabs DJ’s pet from the bowl while Bradley grabs the bowl and throws it in a trashcan.
“Thanks,” DJ says relieved while Chef gives him back his pet bunny. “You guys are awesome.”
“No problem DJ,” Chef says.
“We were happy to due it for you,” Bradley says.
“Who left this?” DJ asks picking up the rat poison. He then picks up the chocolate bar. “Do you think it was Barbie?”
“No idea,” Bradley says. “But it wouldn’t shock me. She’s careless and that chocolate bar is likely hers. What is important is that your bunny is safe.”
“Thank you again,” DJ says as he wipes up the rat poison.
“Listen DJ,” Bradley says. “We were thinking of having you join our alliance?”
“Alliance?” DJ asks surprised. “Aren’t those generally bad?”
“No,” Bradley replies. “I mean me and Chef are in it and we aren’t bad guys are we?”
“No,” DJ says. “Who else is in it?”
“The two of us, Lindsay and Heather,” Bradley replies.
“Heather?” DJ asks.
“She is a nice person,” Bradley says. “Just upset about what happened in World Tour. You can understand.”
“I guess I do,” DJ says. “But why me?”
“Why not you?” Bradley says. “Your strong, you have a good heart and you seem worthy of winning. Plus you’re a good friend of mine.”
“Thanks,” DJ says smiling. “So is Cosmic River in too?”
“Well…no,” Bradley says.
“What?” DJ asks.
“I know that it might be hard for you,” Bradley says. “But Cosmic River’s belief in non-violence is weak for us and makes him a disadvantage. I promise he will be the last non-alliance member we vote if we have to vote him out. I mean you saw how he stopped that caterpillar. What if he did the same for the challenge?”
“I don’t know,” DJ says.
“Don’t do it for yourself,” Bradley says. “Do it for your mother. Do it so she can go back to Jamaica. Make her proud to be your mother and show her what a goo son you are. You want to make your mom happy right? Then join the alliance and up your chances of winning.”
“…I’ll join,” DJ says.
“Were happy to have you,” Bradley says high-fiving as Chef nods.
At the same time Bridgette and Geoff are doing what they always do. Making out.
“Excuse me?” A voice from behind them says.
The two don’t remove their locked lips and continue to kiss.
“Hello?” The person says raising their voice.
The party boy and surfer still kiss passionately.
“Hey!” The voice yells.
Bridgette and Geoff still don’t listen.
The person mumbles and their steps can be heard walking off.
Bridgette and Geoff still kiss…till the person pours a bucket of water on them.
“Huh?” Geoff asks as he and Bridgette look at Rhonda holding a bucket.
“Sorry to interrupt but I was wondering if Geoff would show me how he cooked that shrimp from the last challenge?”
“Sure,” Geoff says as he helps Bridgette up. “Come on Bridge.”
“Sorry,” Rhonda says. “But Bridgette needs to wait here.”
“Why?” Bridgette asks.
“I have a rule about how many people I let in the kitchen after an incident happened," Rhonda replies. "And with the interns there cooking for the reward today, you and Geoff will exceed the capacity. Sorry.”
“It’s ok,” Bridgette replies. “I’ll miss you!”
“He’ll be gone for like twenty minutes,” Rhonda says.
“I’ll miss you too,” Geoff says. “But I will come back! I swear!”
“Again, twenty minutes…” Rhonda says.
“I’ll never forget you!” Bridgette shouts as Geoff and Rhonda leave.
“No one ever listens to me…” Rhonda mumbles.
Bridgette sits alone, not making out, for once.
“What am I worried about?” Bridgette asks. “I’ll be fine without Geoff. I’m still a person without him.”
…
…
…
…
…
“I MISS GEOFF!”
The scene changes to a section of the economy class, where Jovi and Courtney are talking and Rosamond (who is snuggled with her cats) is reading a book titled Edgar Allan Poe.
“So Courtney,” Jovi says. “You never finished telling us about that pen-pal of yours. What did that letter say?”
Courtney blushes and says, “Um…”
“Hearken!” Rosamond screams.
“What?” Jovi asks.
“Sorry,” The goth cat lady says blushing. “I was just reading The Tell-Tale Heart.”
Jovi giggles. “Sometimes your so perky I forget your darker interests.”
Bridgette walks by slumping and sniffling.
“Bridgette?” Courtney asks. “What’s wrong? And where is Geoff?”
“Rhonda needed his help with cooking for the reward,” Bridgette replies. “And I couldn’t come.”
“You can hang with us if you,” Courtney says.
“Really?” Bridgette asks.
“Of course,” Jovi replies.
“I don’t see why not,” Rosamond says.
“Thanks,” Bridgette says talking a seat next to Courtney.
“So Bridgette,” Jovi says. “You surf a lot right?”
“Yup,” Bridgette replies. “Though I haven’t gone surfing for along time.”
“Why not?” Courtney asks. “You love surfing.”
“Well, I guess I’ve been spending a lot of time with Geoff,” the surfer girl replies.
“Does Geoff like any sports that you have to watch?” Jovi asks.
“Um…I don’t know,” Bridgette asks. “We usually just make out.”
“I’ve noticed,” Jovi replies. “How well do you know each other?”
“Well we’ve been dating for a year now,” Bridgette replies.
“That didn’t answer my question,” Jovi states.
“When is our anniversary?” Rosamond asks.
“Um…I can’t remember,” Bridgette admits.
“You can’t remember your own anniversary,” Jovi says. “But you spend so much time with Geoff?”
“Quit being so harsh,” Courtney says.
“Sorry,” Jovi replies. “I just want to know. You guys just seem to be always making out. Just curious to see if there is more to their relationship then French kissing. I mean would he be able to answer questions about you?”
“What are you saying?” Bridgette asks.
“I’m not trying to be rude nor am I saying you guys aren’t good for each other,” Jovi replies. “I’m just saying you need to evaluate your relationship. I mean if you get married to Geoff in the future you two can’t always make out. In any case, let’s change the subject.”
“Agreed,” Courtney says.
“What do you think the reward will be for the challenge?” Rosamond asks.
“It must be something big,” Courtney says. “I’ve seen interns carrying a lot of things. Even Jenny and Toby were doing work.”
“Well,” Jovi says. “I hope we win whatever the reward is.”
Later, everyone heads to the cafeteria for lunch.
“Why do you think Chris wanted us all here for lunch?” Bridgette asks the other girls.
“No idea,” Jovi replies. “But if I had to guess it must be about that big reward.”
“Hey guys,” Courtney says pointing. “Look…
Jovi, Bridgette and Rosamond turn to look at a table, where a lot of people are looking. They gasp. The camera does not show the table counter top.
“Wow…” Jovi says.
“Disgusting,” Bridgette says covering her mouth.
“Who would do such a thing?” Rosamond asks.
“What is it?” Gwen asks behind the crowd of people.
No one says anything and let her step forward.
Gwen gasps as she reads.
Sierra and Nellie charge in.
“What’s going on?” Sierra asks.
“Someone carved extremely inappropriate vandalism of Gwen on the table,” Courtney answers.
“I didn’t even knew some of those words,” Rosamond says shielding Coraline’s eyes.
Sierra and Nellie look at each other and both shrug.
Chris and Rhonda walk in.
“What’s going on?” Chris asks. “You guys are acting like…”
Chris looks at the table and quickly turns away.
“Who did this?” Rhonda asks.
“Well,” Courtney says. “It’s against Gwen so it must be someone who has a bone to pick with her.”
“It’s carved onto the table,” Jovi says. “And one person who always carves and now dislikes Gwen is…”
Everyone turns to look at Duncan.
“Duncan?” Gwen asks sobbing. “Why?”
“I didn’t do it,” Duncan replies angrily.
“You did leave the first class a bit ago saying you were going on walk,” Chef says.
“So?” Duncan asks. “I went to be alone. I didn’t carve it.”
“The facts are against you,” Courtney says. “You weren’t around with your teammates, you carve all the time, you’re from juvie so you would know this language and you and Gwen broke up so you had a reason to be angry.”
“I didn’t do it!” Duncan yells. “Why wouldn’t I fess up about the craving if I did do t anyway?”
“Because it could lead to your elimination,” Chef states.
“As much fun as this is,” Chris says. “We have an extra important challenge to get to. But first lunch.”
“But what about the graffiti?” Courtney says. “Duncan should be punished.”
“I think I should get to tell my side of the story,” Duncan replies.
“This isn’t fair to Gwen,” Rosamond says putting to a crying Gwen.
“Anyone who doesn’t sit down for lunch gets thrown off the plane without a parachute,” Chris states.
The contestants mumble and sit down at available tables.
“Nellie,” Sierra whispers to her gloomy gal pal. “Did you carve that?”
“I’m depressed not heartless,” Nellie replies. “And I know you didn’t write it, did you?”
“You know right,” Sierra replies. “So who do you think wrote it?”
“It seems like Duncan,” Nellie replies.
“Well from his juvie records I…um, acquired,” Sierra says. “Duncan has done tons of vandalizing, and I have seen some of them use those words. In any case, should we stop the plan?”
Nellie and Sierra turn around to see a crying Gwen eating into her sandwich.
“Too late now,” Nellie says.
Sierra nods and the two proceed to each their lunch.
Meanwhile, Bridgette, Rosamond, Courtney and Jovi are eating lunch together.
Suddenly Geoff comes rushing in and grabs Bridgette up in his arms. “Bridge!” Geoff cheers as he leans into a kiss.
“Um Geoff,” Bridgette says. “We need to talk.”
Geoff sits Bridgette down and says, “Sure thing, what’s up?”
Bridgette sighs. “I think we need to be apart for a bit.”
“Your breaking up with me?” Geoff asks devastated.
“No,” Bridgette replies. “I just think we need to slow things down. I want to spend some time with my female friends.”
“You can spend time with them while we make-out,” Geoff suggests.
“That’s not the same,” Bridgette says. “Geoff I really like you but we need to have lives apart from each other. I mean I haven’t been persuading my interests and I don’t know a lot of things about you. I don’t know your favorite sport or color. I think we need to spend more time dating and getting to know each other. And we need to a long break from kissing.”
“I don’t see the point?” Geoff asks. “Were soul-mates Bridge!”
“Think of the future,” Bridgette says. “We can’t just keep making out when were grown up!”
“Why not?” Geoff asks.
“Please,” Bridgette says. “Do this for me.”
“Ok,” Geoff replies. “For you.”
“Thank you Geoff!” Bridgette says. “We can have a date sometime soon. I promise.”
“As long as your happy,” Geoff says.
Bridgette sits back down while Geoff walks off.
Unexpected Guest
“So,” Chris says after a few minutes of lunch. “I hope your enjoying your lunch because we will need to leave soon. If you’ve noticed, some of the interns have been doing some things. Today’s reward is extremely special. First and second place will both get to see two new movies before they’re released to theaters.”
“What are they?” Sierra says.
“The Adventures of Cobra Man and The Inappropriate Movie 2; We Go There,” Chris replies.
SG is shown in the confessional. “I love Cobra Man!” He says. “I was a big fan of the comic as a kid and have written a few fanfictions about Cobra Man. I’d like to see it…but my team hates me so much I doubt I could enjoy it. And I feel too guilty.”
“Inappropriate Movie 2?” Sierra asks Chris hopefully. “I loved the original! I heard Raoul gets pregnant in this movie!”
“Isn’t Raoul a dude though?” Mikey asks.
“I hate you,” Sierra replies bitterly.
“I know,” Mikey sighs hanging his head in shame.
“But first and second place get to see the movies after the special feast!” Chris says. “We have many of our old dishes being remade especially for this feast.”
“It couldn’t get any better!” Lindsay cheers.
“Oh it does,” Chris replies. “We have an extremely special prize for those in first and second. After the challenge, first and second will be presented three curtains. Behind each is an extra special reward, which if used right, could be very useful. However, you won’t know what the prizes are until after you pick the curtain. First place will pick a curtain and the second place will pick a curtain. The last curtain not picked will also go to first place.”
“Why not let first place pick two curtains if they’re going to get two curtains either way?” Heather asks.
“Eh,” Chris replies.
“What happens if we get last place?” Bridgette asks.
“Last place will go to elimination immediately after quietly watching the other two teams get first place. Which means you have no time to suggest who gets voted off.”
A ding noise goes off and Chris smirks. “We have arrived at Washington D.C.! Now before we start our challenge, you guys are going to have to wear some costumes…”
The scene changes to a closed off street in Washington. A long, wide, large tub of water is seen running down the closed off street.
“This is ridiculous, even for this show,” Heather complains, walking out dressed like Michelle Obama. “Why do we have to dress as U.S. figures from history?”
“Because were in the very historical capital of the U.S.,” Chris replies. “Besides, you could be Nellie or Chef.”
“If I could I would kill you,” Chef replies walking out dressed like Hilary Clinton.
“You know you love cross-dressing,” Chris teases. “Now the rest of you come out so we can begin.”
Nellie walks out dressed out like Sarah Palin and drips on the heels she has to wear, though her poofy hair cushioned the blow.
“I didn’t think this show could be more trivial,” Nellie says. “I can’t believe I ever thought something could be that good. I’ve learned my lesson.”
“Who are we suppose to be?” Rosamond asks, walking out with Jovi, where both are dressed like Native Americans.
“Your Pocahontas and your Sacajawea,” Chris replies.
“Whose who?” Jovi asks.
“Does it matter?” Chris asks. “Your both Indians.”
“Wow,” Jovi says. “That was extremely offensive. The correct term is Native Americans and historically it is important.”
“Aren’t you worried showing off American history might offend the viewers from or not from America or be seen as political and against their party?” Heather asks.
Rhonda sighs and says, “I don’t think our viewers will think that. I have faith in them to know were not smart enough to be political. The best political humor you’re going to get is Chef as Hilary Clinton. Of course, you would find a way to complain Heather.”
“Whatever,” Heather says, “Let’s just start the challenge already.”
“I agree,” Chris says. “Everyone get out here!”
Everyone else walks out grumbling. Sierra is dressed as the Statue of Liberty, Lindsay is Betty Ross, Bradley is dressed as Theodore Roosevelt, DJ is Barack Obama, Trent is Abraham Lincoln, SG is dressed as George Washington, Mikey is dressed as Paul Revere, Cosmic River is dressed as George Armstrong Cutler, Courtney is dressed as Amelia Earhart, Bridgette is dressed as Helen Keller, Barbie is dressed as Susan B. Anthony, Gwen is dressed as Annie Oakley, Noah is dressed as Benjamin Franklin, and Duncan is dressed as John Adams.
“Are you sure everyone is going to know who we are dressed as?” Mikey asks.
“Don’t know, don’t care,” Chris replies. “Now for today’s challenge each team will have two people get on one side of a giant log of cherry tree since George Washington cut one down or something. Contestants will log roll through that tub of water to the end. At the end there is a platform with three flagpoles, each flagpole being one of your team colors. When you reach your flag pull you have to hoist up the American flag on it. First to have their American flag reach top wins.”
“Easy enough,” Duncan says.
“That’s not all,” Chris says. “If you or your partner falls off the log then you both are out and can’t compete. And were going to have American related obstacles to try and get you to fall off the log. So if everyone fails off his or her log your team is out. Now it does take two people to spin a log but each team has an even number of players so that shouldn’t be a problem.”
“I only count five of us,” Rosamond states.
The members of Team Indestructible look around and see that they’re missing a member.
“Where’s Geoff?” Bridgette asks worried.
“Don’t know,” Chris replies. “But we don’t have time to look for him. So, one person on your team will have to sit out from the log roll. Now everyone get ready!”
Sierra is shown in the confessional. “I’m not worrying about losing. I’m a third generation log roller so we got it. I just wish the prize would be Julie.”
Later everyone is on a log. Trent sat out for Team Indestructible, so Bridgette is rolling with Courtney and Jovi is rolling with Rosamond. Sierra is rolling with Nellie, Mikey is rolling with SG and Gwen is rolling with Noah. Lindsay is rolling with Bradley, Chef is rolling with Heather, and Duncan is rolling with Barbie.
On your mark,” Chris says. “Get ready,”
“Wait a minute,” Courtney says. “These aren’t cherry trees. They’re oak trees with cherries glued on them. Are you really that cheap?”
“Yes,” Chris replies. “Go!”
Everyone starts log rolling except Barbie and Duncan.
“Go you fat cow!” Duncan yells at the unmoving Barbie.
Barbie sighs and jumps into the water.
“Duncan and Barbie are out,” Chris announces.
Bradley and Lindsay take the lead, but Rosamond and Jovi are gaining, thanks to the help of Rosamond’s cats.
“Were winning!” Lindsay cheers.
“Of course,” Bradley replies with a smile. We’re a dream team.”
“Release the eagles,” Chris says to Rhonda.
Rhonda opens a cage a horde of angry eagles rush out, sticking their talons out and preparing to attack the contestants.
The eagles’ talons grab Lindsay’s hair and knock her into the water. The eagles then push in Bradley.
At the same time Gwen stops logging rolling.
“I don’t feel well,” Gwen says. She suddenly upchucks all over the log and falls into the water.
“That was pleasant,” Noah says. An eagle then pushes him into the water.
"Awe,” Lindsay says. “It’s wet.”
“Wow Lindsay, you must be a rocket scientist,” Noah replies sarcastically.
“Oh silly Noel,” Lindsay says. “I’m not a rocket scientist.”
“You don’t say,” Noah says.
The eagles knock Bridgette and Courtney into the water and then try to attack Sierra and Nellie.
“Ahhh!” Sierra screams trying to hit the eagles with her torch.
“Ouch,” Nellie says as an eagle laches onto her head repeatedly pecks it.
“This is too violent man,” Cosmic River tells DJ. “And all this animal abuse isn’t groovy. I’m going to quit.”
“But we lose the challenge,” DJ says. “Don’t you want to win?”
“Not if it means eagles being used and abused man,” Cosmic River says before jumping into the water.
“Looks like there’s only one person from each team,” Jovi states.
Suddenly an eagle comes swooping in and tries to attack Jovi and Rosamond.
“Meow!” BeetleJuice yells and pounces on the eagle.
“I love your cats,” Jovi says relieved.
“Thanks,” Rosamond replies.
“All right let’s get ready for round two,” Chris says to Rhonda. Rhonda blows a special whistle and the eagles quickly fly back to their cage.
“Where almost there!” Rosamond cheers.
Suddenly a firework whizzes past the two and hits Heather and Chef’s log, knocking them both off before dangerously exploding.
“Was that fireworks?” Jovi asks.
“Faulty fireworks,” Chris corrects. He fires off another that knocks Rosamond and Jovi off their log and then twirling off into a building.
“Well that was short and anticlimactic,” Chris says. “Anyway, The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice win first place!”
“I thought we were the Fun Bunch?” Noah says.
“We had a special request not to call you that since some of you aren’t Fun Bunch members,” Chris says.
“Thank you for considering us,” Sierra says.
“It was more for market purposing,” Chris replies. “But your welcome. Team Indestructible came in second so they’ll be sharing the Fist Class with you. And The Bulldogs lost so they have to go to their first elimination ever! Now let’s all go to the plane and see what’s behind those curtains.”
As Chris turns to leave, an awkward, shy, brunette haired girl, dressed in sparkly clothing and carrying a guitar case walks up to Chris.
“Excuse me,” She meekly says. “I’m suppose to play at this venue.”
“What?” Chris asks. “What band are you?”
“…Sparkle Pony,” the girl replies.
“Sparkle Pony?” Chris asks while laughing. “What are you? Another dorky My Little Pony fan? That name sucks almost as much as you are ugly. I wouldn’t have you playing this event. Try checking in Las Vegas. I heard they took freaks.”
Sparkle Pony leaves with her head hanging low.
Chris heads back to the plane, along with everyone else. Gwen goes back clutching her stomach and as she turns the corner going off-screen you can hear her throwing up.
“What about Geoff?” Bridgette asks.
“Maybe he’s back on the plane,” Courtney says hopefully.
Bridgette nods and they walk off. However Bridgette stops for a second and looks around to see if she can find Geoff, just in case he is here.
“Bridge!” A familiar voice shouts.
Bridgette turns around to see Geoff running to her carrying flowers.
“Geoff,” Bridgette says hugging her boyfriend. “I was so worried. Where were you?”
“I got you these,” Geoff says handing her marigolds.
“No don’t!” Bridgette says handing them back. “I’m severally allergic to marigolds.”
“Sorry!” Geoff says nervously, as he tosses them in a garbage can. “I had no idea.”
“It’s ok,” Bridgette replies. “But that’s what I’m talking about. We don’t a lot about one another. That’s why we need to take things slowly.”
“Sorry Bridge,” Geoff says putting his hands in the air for defense.
“I know you were just trying to make me feel better,” Bridgette says. “But we needed you at the challenge. We came in second, but that prize could give us an advantage.”
“I didn’t mean to disappoint you,” Geoff says.
“You didn’t,” Bridgette says. “Just be careful, you could voted out. Now come on, we better hurry if we don’t want to be late.”
Meanwhile, Sparkle Pony is walking away looking for somewhere, anywhere, that will take her. She sees a bus saying Las Vegas and boards it, thinking it will take her to where she will play like Chris kinda said…
Later, back at the plane, everyone is gathered around three large purple curtains, so thick you can’t see the silhouettes of what is behind them.
“Hey,” Jenny says. “Aren’t those the curtains you wanted us to get a few episodes ago?”
“Yes,” Rhonda replies. “And you never did.”
“For winning first place Sierra will pick her team’s first prize from the three curtains. Then Jovi will pick her team’s prize and Sierra’s team will the remaining. Then all the curtains will drop and reveal the prizes. So Sierra, pick.”
“Well,” Sierra says. “First is the worst, second is the best and third is the one with a hairy chest, so we’ll take second.”
“I was hoping you would,” Chris says with an evil smirk. “Jovi?”
Suddenly, Rosamond’s cats start clawing and meowing at the third curtain.
“What’s wrong?” Jovi asks.
“They want you to pick it,” Rosamond replies.
“Why?” Jovi asks.
“They say it’s a surprise I’ll love,” Rosamond says. “But I don’t know what.”
“Well I trust Rosamond so I trust her babies,” Jovi says. “Curtain three.”
“This too great,” Chris says smirking heavily. “That means one goes to Sierra. So, let’s drop the curtains…”
…Cody, Julie and Nate, sitting on stools in that order. :O
“Meet the additions to your teams,” Chris says.
“I’m back!” Julie cheers.
“Julie and Cody are on our team!” Sierra says almost hyperventilating.
“Yup,” Chris says. “Julie, Cody and Nate choose the purple cupcake at the aftermath, and whoever from the peanut gallery choose them got the chance to return.”
“You’re kidding,” Heather says. “While we lose a teammate they get one?”
“Actually one team got two new people,” Lindsay states.
“So wait,” Rosamond says. “Nate is on our team?!?”
“Yup,” Chris replies. “He was sitting near the peanut gallery and managed to get a purple cupcake. So we let him debut.”
Rosamond gives a squeal worthy of Katie and Sadie and rushes to hug Nate.
“I missed you,” Nate says.
“Me too,” Rosamond replies as Rosamond’s cats start to rub against him.
“Awe,” Jovi, Courtney and Bridgette say together.
“You’re really back?” Nellie asks.
“Yup,” Julie replies. “I’m bringing sexy back!”
“Weren’t you the reason it left?” Nellie asks.
“>_>” Julie replies.
“Well,” Chris says the reunion is great and all but we have an elimination.”
“Fleece Navidad!” Julie yells.
“Did you just yell that to get more lines?” Rhonda asks.
“Yes,” Julie replies. “Though technically it is continuing the fact that I know Spanish so it isn’t a fact that was brought up from random.”
“Let’s just go,” Rhonda says to Chris.
A few minutes later, The Bulldogs are sitting the bleachers while Rhonda holds barf-bags on tray.
“Welcome to your first elimination,” Chris says. “It’s extremely special because you haven’t had time to discuss who you want to vote out. You’ve all stamped passports to show who you want to go home. I’ll call names and then Rhonda will throw you a barf-bag of airline issue peanuts. If you get one your safe and can stay for another challenge. The person who does not get one is voted off and must take the Drop Of Shame. And the first barf bag goes to…DJ, who, was almost always in the bottom two last time ironically.”
DJ happily catches his barf-bag while Bradley and Chef give an approving nod to DJ, who smiles in return.
“The next barf bags go to…Lindsay and Bradley, are cute little couple.”
The two catch their barf-bags and Lindsay grabs Bradley in excitement.
‘Were safe,” Lindsay cheers.
“I never doubted it,” Bradley says. “I would never let you leave.”
Bradley then kisses Lindsay who kisses back, and the two start making out.
Heather makes a vomiting motion.
“Jealous your going to die alone Heather?” Rhonda asks.
“Look who’s talking,” Heather replies.
“Shush,” Chris says to the two ladies. “The next barf-bags go to…Chef and Cosmic River.”
The two catch their barf-bags.
“Are bottom three,” Chris says talking to Duncan, Heather and Barbie. Barbie, your team hates you.”
“I don’t hate anybody man,” Cosmic River replies.
“Duncan you supposedly vandalized that table and won a previous season,” Chris says.
“It wasn’t me,” Duncan replies.
“And Heather you’ve done lots of villainous things, have been really rude and also won a previous season.”
Heather looks unworried while she files her nails.
“Each of you received at least one vote,” Chris states. “But the next barf-bag goes to…”
“…Barbie.”
Barbie catches her barf-bag, clearly surprised.
Chris clears his throat and says, “Heather, Duncan…the last barf-bag goes to…”
“…Heather.”
“Obviously,” Heather states.
“Whatever,” Duncan replies to Heather. “If we would have had time to discuss this you would have been voted off and I would be able to prove that I didn’t do it. But I suppose that I don’t need this show anymore.”
Duncan grabs his parachute and jumps out.
“Like I would have left with just your one vote,” Heather says, as if Duncan was still here.
“You mean two votes,” Rhonda mumbles.
“What?” Heather asks. “Someone else voted for me! Who…”
Heather turns to look at Barbie.
“You disgusting little pig,” Heather says angrily. “You voted for me! You should have voted for yourself! You’re a useless bag of crap that doesn’t do anything but make are team look ugly! You’re fatter than Chevy Chase and eat your weight in junk food everyday. Your parents don’t love you, no one here loves you, and no one will ever love you! So go ahead and throw yourself off this plane! Don’t you ever think you can vote me off or think you can last longer than I can! You got that, you cow?”
Barbie doesn’t reply and just walks off.
“Harsh,” Chef says.
“Well that ends another episode,” Chris says. “Join us next time on Total Drama What The Heck?”
Cosmic River is shown in the confessional. “That was…horrible. Heather went ape all over Barbie. I’m the one that voted for Heather, man. She’s cruel and mean and after she almost tried to squash my caterpillar friend I knew I had to make Heather book it. You dig? But know she blamed poor Barbie. I don’t know what to do.”
Bradley is shown in the confessional smirking. “Duncan went home just like I planned. I’m the one who vandalized the table; all to make people think Duncan do it so he could get voted off. True, I wrote horrible, inappropriate things about Gwen but she’s expendable and she isn’t going to win this season. Thinks are going perfectly.”
Barbie is shown in the confessional. Barbie sighs…then bursts into tears…
Chapter 9 The Situation (Part 1)
Rhonda and Chris are shown in the front of the plane, piloting it.
“Welcome to another exciting episode of Total Drama,” Chris announces. “Please note that this opening takes place two days after the actual events of the episode, which take place in the first day of the three day period between challenges.”
“What?” Rhonda asks confused.
“Never mind,” Chris replies. “Last time on Total Drama What The Heck, Nellie and Sierra began their revenge plan on Gwen, Bradley seduced Lindsay and got DJ to join his alliance by secretly almost poisoning DJ’s beloved, big-eyed bunny baby. Heather almost squashed a poor tomato worm, but luckily hippy dippy saved it. Bridgette and Geoff were separated for twenty minutes where Bridgette made new female friends, did some evaluating of her relationship and swore off making out with Geoff. During lunch, inappropriate and hurtful vandalism of Gwen was carved on a table and was so bad we couldn’t show it on camera.”
“Duncan was pin-pointed as the likely suspect,” Rhonda continues. “But he denied those claims. A special reward for second and first place was announced, with getting first class, a feast, and free movies before they’re in theaters and special secret prizes behind curtains, while last place had to go to elimination immediately. The contestants dressed up like historical American figures and log rolled on cherry trees while eagles attacked and fireworks were fired and stuff.”
“The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice won first place,” Chris announces. “And Team Indestructible won second. Sierra and Jovi chose the prizes and it was revealed that Sierra had chosen a returning Julie and a debuting Cody as teammates and Jovi had chosen Nate, Rosamond's childhood friend and newcomer to the series, as a team member. At elimination, Barbie, Duncan and Heather were in the bottom three and Duncan was voted off. After it was revealed that Heather had two votes she said it was likely Barbie and horribly insulted her.
“But during confessionals,” Rhonda says. “It was revealed Cosmic River voted for Heather, Bradley framed Duncan and Barbie ended the show by…crying?”
“How will the teams do with the new players?” Chris asks the viewers. “Will Bradley be revealed as the culprit? Will Heather keep bullying Barbie? Will Julie and SG get together? Or will Julie hook up with…Sierra?”
“What The Heck?” Rhonda asks.
“What I’m a Purple Hair Shipper,” Chris explains. “AKA Julie x Sierra. The two get along, are both hyper and would treat each other with respect based on their previous relationship problems. Plus that story, Purple Hair Date is great!”
“I’m a Fun Duo Shipper,” Toby says entering with Jenny. “AKA Sierra x Nellie. Sierra brings out the best in Nellie and acts to protect her while Nellie is there to care and listen. It’s obvious they belong together.”
“Please tell me your not shipping Jenny?” Rhonda asks.
“Nope,” Jenny replies. “Toby just can’t appear in a scene without me.”
“Your obviously mistaken,” Chris yells. “Sierra and Julie are soul mates and are so cute together. I’m gonna write a fanfic about them being school girls and eating purple grapes together.”
“It will not be as good as my Fun Duo story about Nellie coming from poverty and Sierra coming from a rich family and their forbidden love!”
“Purple Hair Forever!” Chris yells.
“Fun Duo!” Toby shouts.
“You’re both wrong,” The redheaded intern says walking in. “It’s obvious that your bickering is pointless.”
“Thank you,” Rhonda says.
“Because Purple Rain is the best couple ever!” The redheaded intern shouts. “Nellie x Julie forever!”
As the trio continues to argue over fanon and ignore the canon, Rhonda and Jenny look on disgracefully.
“Just cue the theme music,” Jenny mumbles.
(Theme music plays)
The two winning teams are seen walking into first class wearing 3D glasses.
“That was an awesome movie!” Sierra cheers.
“Which?” Rosamond asks.
“Both!” Sierra replies. “Though I love the Inappropriate Movie series. I do have a thing for men in tights. Do you have any pictures of yourself in tights Cody?”
“What?” Cody asks.
Cody is shown in the confessional. “I’m kind of happy to be back. Yeah, the challenges suck but I’m on a team with Gwen! And she’s on the rebound! Though Sierra is being a little too clingy and her friends are kind of creepy. But they have the power and I’m on their good side so I’m safe. The only thing is how can I convince them to save Gwen?”
“I’m so happy to be back!” Julie cheers and proceeds to do a cartwheel.
“Were happy your back!” Sierra cheers.
“I’m never happy,” Nellie replies depressingly following them.
“We know Nellie,” Julie replies. “Your character has been established as the depressed one. Now come on guys, let’s go eat some spicy Doritos poolside while the scene changes to a different group of people by starting the sentence with meanwhile.”
Meanwhile, Jovi, Bridgette, Geoff, Courtney, Rosamond and Nate are talking up in First Class (so basically the same place The Fun Bunch scene was/is happening).
“So Nate,” Jovi says. “Mind telling us about yourself?”
“I guess not,” Nate replies. “But why?”
“So we can learn more about are new team member,” Jovi replies.
“You don’t need to know anything,” Rosamond replies. “Nate’s awesome!”
Nate blushes and replies, “Aw thanks Rosamond. But I don’t mind answering questions, as long as we go to the dining room. I’m really hungry.”
“Sounds good,” Bridgette replies.
“Can I ask SG to join us?” Rosamond asks.
“SG?” Nate asks. “Why?”
“He’s a friend of mine,” Rosamond says. “And he’s a little down on his luck. I’ll tell you later."
“Uh, ok,” Nate replies, walking with everyone else.
Rosamond and her cats walk up to SG, who is on a computer.
“Hey SG,” Rosamond asks. “Me and some of my teammates are gonna have a snack in the kitchen and chat. Wanna come?”
SG blushes and meekly replies, “No thanks.”
“Oh, ok,” Rosamond replies.
Rosamond is shown in the confessional. “I don’t know why SG wants to stay all alone up there. I feel bad that he has to be shunned over a misunderstanding, and I wish he would go explain to Julie, but he’s just too shy too. I kinda want to do it for him, but he has to do it himself if he wants to prove he is sorry. But all he seems to do is use that computer. I’ll just need to try harder to help him.”
A little later, the group sits down in the dining table. They are shown eating tiny sandwiches and crackers.
“So what do you guys want to know?” Nate asks.
“Just to see if your awesome as Rosamond says you are,” Jovi replies.
“Rosamond talks about me?” Nate asks blushing.
“A little,” Rosamond says, turning as red as her sweater. “They often ask about you more than you come up in conversation.”
“So Nate,” Bridgette says. “What’s better, a ninja or a pirate?”
“…Their child,” Nate replies smugly.
“My mind is blown,” Geoff replies. The others laugh.
“So Rosamond tells us you’re a really great detective,” Jovi says.
“I’m not that great,” Nate replies blushing.
“You’re good enough to win a state wide mystery contest,” Rosamond points out. “You did?” Courtney asks.
“Yeah,” Nate replies. “It was pretty fun. Though tons of strange people showed up.” “Strange?” Courtney asks.
“Well, for example,” Nate explains. “I met this group of four teens and a Doberman. They were nice people, though this one guy was extremely tall and skinny and was always eating. And they talked like they were from the seventies and believed that their dog could talk.”
“How did they place?” Jovi asks.
“I don’t know,” Nate replies. “I didn’t seen them after the drug test.”
Jovi giggles and adds, “Well you seem ok in my book. You’re very funny, and very nice. It’s great to have you part of the team.”
“Thanks,” Nate says blushing.
“Though you are kinda corny,” Rosamond teases.
“Says the girl who makes cat puns,” Nate teases back. “So how did your talk to SG go?”
“Not well,” Rosamond replies. “SG was tricked by Gwen into voting off Julie who he likes, but doesn’t believe could like him. Gwen made him think Julie was manipulating him and now the majority of the team is against him. I tried to see if he wanted to spend time with us, but he prefers that computer.”
“Annie said he did use a computer a lot,” Nate says. “But doesn’t the Internet have spoilers that could be used as advantages?”
“No,” Jovi replies. “The computers are highly censored so that we don’t discover any information that could be used for our advantage.”
Suddenly the redhead intern walks in. “Um…is Geoff here?”
“That’s me,” Geoff says walking over to the intern. “How may I help you?”
“You have a call from your parents,” The redheaded intern replies. “It’s very urgent. Please follow me.”
Geoff walks off, following the intern with a confused face.
“So…” Jovi says.
“You wanna know how the date went earlier?” Bridgette says getting to the point.
The girls nod.
“I guess…” Nate says, confused on what is happening.
“I’ll explain later,” Rosamond replies.
“Well,” Bridgette replies. “We learned we didn’t have much in common. It started with small things like him liking milk chocolate and he liking white or me like smooth peanut butter and him liking crunchy. But then we got into more personal stuff. Geoff loves a good cookout and enjoys meat and I’m a vegetarian. Geoff is a big sports fan and I don’t really care for it. Geoff wants to live in a big city like, New York, for the awesome parties and I want to live near the coast. The list goes on and on.”
“…Are you going to call it quits?” Nate asks.
The other girls look at him and he blushes.
“What?” Nate asks. “I got drawn in.”
“I’m not giving up,” Bridgette replies. “Me and Geoff have been very close and I’m not willing to give up yet. We can still work this out.”
“You’re a fighter Bridgette,” Jovi says. “I hope you two can stay together.”
Geoff suddenly walks in with a very sad face.
“Bridgette,” Geoff states. “I need to talk to you in private.”
Geoff walks away and Bridgette follows with a troubled look on her face.
“So…” Nate says. “You guys have an mysteries you need solving?”
“Not that I can think of,” Rosamond says.
“You couldn’t solve the mystery of the used confessional could you?” Courtney asks. “I was trying to use the confessional last night but it was always occupied. I even waited for twenty minutes but no one came out. Not to mention the lack of toilet paper in there was this morning.”
“I can solve that mystery!” Nate shouts as he takes a pencil and a notebook. He rushes off.
“Does he know I didn’t mean it literally right?” Courtney asks.
Rosamond laughs and says, “Nate’s very excitable and loves solving mysteries. It’s kind silly how excited he can get, but you got to love that about him.”
Jovi and Courtney snicker. Rosamond’s raises her eyebrow about it but decides to laugh it off.
Meanwhile, Bridgette and Geoff are alone.
“What’s wrong Geoff?” Bridgette asks, her face pale from fear.
“My parents had some information to tell me,” Geoff replies. He avoids eye contact with Bridgette.
“What did they say?” Bridgette asks.
“Apparently,” Geoff says. “I failed school. I was suppose to attend summer school but forgot to inform them. Now that I missed it by being here, I’m going to get held back.”
“Oh Geoff,” Bridgette says grabbing him in a hug.
“I don’t know what I’m going to do,” Geoff says. “Everyone will know I’m not suppose to be in that grade and will think I’m an idiot. I’ll lose all my friends.”
“Not all,” Bridgette says. “You still have me. And I’ll stick by you no matter what grade your in. We’ll get through this, together. We are boyfriend and girlfriend after all.”
“You’re the best Bridgette,” Geoff replies, hugging her tighter.
The scene changes to Julie, Cody, Sierra and Nellie walking back into First Class.
“Stupid plot convent pool cleaning,” Julie complains. “Now we can’t go swimming!”
“Now what?” Sierra asks.
A large clank is heard and the group turns around to see an extra large TV in front of them.
“What’s this doing here?” Cody asks.
“Oh hi,” Rhonda says popping out from behind the TV. “A generous fan donated this TV to the show on the promise that we put it up in first class. So now you guys have a flat screen TV!”
“Yay, plot convent TV!” Julie cheers.
“Cool,” Cody says staring at the TV.
“Enjoy,” Rhonda says tossing Julie the remote. “But due note some channels have automatic blocks that active when possible spoilers are to be revealed.”
Rhonda leaves as the four contestants take a seat in chairs near the TV.
“Awe TV,” Julie says. “It can make allusions to other fanfictions, make pop culture references and speed the plot up.”
Julie turns on the TV where kids are rowing in boats at a place called Paradise Falls. They’re grabbing flags from buoys.
“That looks like such a better reality show,” Julie says.
The show goes to commercial, so Julie turns to a new broadcast.
“An other news,” a reporter says. “Adele won a lot of Grammies. Surprising, I know. Later, which celebrity is going to need rehab?”
“Shouldn’t the question be what celebrity doesn’t?” Sierra asks. “It’d be easier to list.”
“And,” the reporter adds. “We’ll have an exclusive interview with Neil Patrick Harris.”
“EEEEEEEEEEEE!” Sierra sequels. “Me and my mom are crazy about Neil Patrick Harris! He’s like third on my hottest celebrity list. Right after Cody and Chord Overstreet from Glee.”
"And," the reporter says. "Scientific studies have shown that cats are evolving through memes. It started with keyboard cats and the nyan cat and now they are wearing bread! Scientists say cats may evolve to become as smart as humans. Do you believe this? Will tell more about this next."
"I would say no they aren't," Nellie says. "But if people actually buy that than cats are definitely smarter."
“Attention!” The news reporter yells. “We have some breaking news! A horrible tragedy has happened! It appears only a few hours ago a giant factory that produces spray tans and hair spray has suffered a horrible explosion! All workers in the factory are reported to be dead, and the whereabouts of the wealthy owner, rich business man Paul Vito Mackenzie, are unknown as of now. The cause of the explosion is unknown as well. Several close by buildings have been reported as destroyed as well. But tragically, this is not the worse part. It seems dangerous, toxic chemicals have been released and have spread all over the Jersey Shore area. The chemicals are extremely dangerous, and seem to be wrapping the minds of people, driving them crazy. U.S. military has successfully evacuated a majority of the people there. However a small portion of people are said to still be in the outskirts of the Jersey Shore area where some people have been able to get electricity, while most places are without power. The factory is reported to be in the same area as those still not evacuated, which means the chemicals are strongest there. Property damage there is extremely high and the long exposure to the chemicals is said to make those in that area very violent. The military has set up a boarder around The Jersey Shore Area and is working on keeping things under control. We’ll give you updates as we get more news.”
“Well I guess where going to Jersey Shore today,” Julie says.
“What?” Cody says. “Did you just hear that news report? Going is suicide! No way the show will go there. And we don’t even have a challenge today.”
“Why else would we see that new report and get a TV if not to explain the danger of Jersey Shore?" Julie asks. "Just give it some time, we will. But I’m prepared, I have mozzarella cheese sticks!” “Ok, well I’ll be back,” Cody says. “I’m just going to check out the plane. Alone.”
As Cody walks off quickly, Julie turns to the others and says, “So I know you two have likely been getting revenge on Gwen. And I’m sure her throwing up last challenge was your handy work right?”
“Yup,” Sierra replies. “We messed with her sandwich while Rhonda was cooking with it. And now that your back we can get her good!”
“I know!” Julie cheers mischievously. “So what should we do next?”
“I don’t know,” Sierra replies. “Maybe we should go find Cody and ask him!”
“No,” Julie replies. “No offense, but I think he wants to keep Gwen here, since he still has feelings for her. You have any ideas Nellie?”
“No,” Nellie replies unemotionally.
Nellie is shown in the confessional. “I feel bad for Gwen. I was upset she betrayed people but I think were going to far. After seeing her cry after reading the vandalism, I don’t feel right sabotaging her. Were only being horrible people and stopping down to her level. We’re only acting like people who cause problems in the world by being petty. I think we should forgive everyone, even SG and Mikey. At least let them explain themselves. People make mistakes, it’s human nature. But…if I tell Sierra and Julie this…how will they react? Will it hurt their feelings? Will they shun and try to punish me too? Will they beat themselves over it?”
At the same time, Barbie is lying down in a section of the economy section, alone. She wipes her eyes with a tissue and looks down at the floor. She looks at her hand, which is no longer covered in gauze but has a scar. She notices a chocolate cherry.
"…Unless Barbie plans on licking the bowl. Then there won't be any left,"
"…Hurry and get it in the basket you hippopotamus!"
“…Your parents don’t love you, no one here loves you, and no one will ever love you! So go ahead and throw yourself off this plane!”
Barbie gets up… and squashes the cherry under her foot. She stomps off…
Meanwhile, Nate returns to the kitchen, where Jovi, Courtney and Rosamond are sitting chatting. Bridgette is there too, looking on one of the First Class computers vigorously.
“Look whose back,” Courtney says as the other girls turn to see Nate. “How did it go?”
“Well,” Nate says. “I investigated the scene and found this!”
Nate holds up a small bit of tissue paper.
“That isn’t used is it?” Rosamond asks.
“No,” Nate replies. “Well, not to clean up excrement anyway. This toilet paper was used as a tissue. I may be jumping to a conclusion here, but I think the person in there was crying. And I found more information. But first, does anyone speak Spanish?”
“I took some Spanish,” Jovi replies. “Knowing foreign languages looks good to colleges.”
“Can you read this?” The boy detective asks handing Jovi a note.
Jovi unfolds a note that is very scribbled on and very erased.
“Well it’s messy,” Jovi says, “But the word odio means hate I believe. And matar means kill. But the rest is just too erased to tell. Where did you get it from?”
“I decided to climb into the vents to see if I could hear information that would help me,” Nate replies.
“Be careful,” Rosamond warns. “I’ve seen rabid animals come out of there and I don’t want you getting hurt.”
“How does a new plane like this have rabid animals?” Nate asks.
“I asked Rhonda the same thing,” Rosamond replies, “And she said that since the plane is modeled like the original, Chris had some animals from the first season’s location captured and released on the plane, to give a Total Drama feel. There are some friendly animals, like some Gulls or really cuties like cockroaches, but most of those poor critters foam at the mouth.”
“Well I wasn’t attacked,” Nate replies. “And I’m a pretty big guy.”
“I know, but you know I’ll worry,” Rosamond says.
“I know,” The kid detective replies blushing.
“I hate to interrupt,” Courtney says. “But what does the note have to do with the locked confessional?”
“It’s most unrelated,” Nate says. “But I think a person has been in there. I saw food wrappers and saw scribbles of that Spanish word for kill…”
“Matar,” Jovi replies.
“Yeah, I saw that everywhere, and found another odd object,” The detective says as he pulls out a lavender cloth.
“That looks familiar,” Jovi says studying the fabric. “It looks like it was part of some strap.”
“That’s what I was thinking,” Nate replies. “But whatever the cause, that mystery is for another time.”
“So what clues did you find?” Jovi asks.
“Well,” Nate replies, “I was in the vents and heard a discussion going on between the Bulldogs…
Flashback
“We need to talk,” Bradley says to his partner in crime, Heather. “You have been avoiding me since the elimination ceremony. What gives?”
“I know your going to complain about how I acted during the elimination ceremony,” Heather replies annoyed.
“I thought it was me making out with Lindsay,” Bradley replies.
“As if I care,” Heather replies with a roll of her eyes. “And Barbie had that coming.”
“I agree,” Bradley replies. “But it’s hard to be aligned to someone everyone hates. Try to be a little nicer or at least bite your tongue if you want to insult someone.”
“I’ve been playing this game for four seasons I know what I’m doing,” Heather replies.
“Yet you’ve gained what out of it?” Bradley asks. “Face it, your strategy has gotten you nothing but ridicule, enemies and embarrassment. You played a good game but the others know how it works and it needs to be more flexible. This isn’t your rinky-dink island.”
“I’d be offended,” Heather replies. “But I know you need me.”
“Do I?” Bradley asks. “I enough DJ, Lindsay, and Chef. There pretty strong players and the four of us make a good number of votes. And I’m sure the others wouldn’t mind voting you out.”
Heather turns away angrily.
“Look, I’m sorry,” The jock says. “But I’m only trying to help so you can make it farther. Just trust me.”
Heather sighs.
Suddenly Cosmic River rushes in.
“Hey cats,” The hippie says. “I’m not interrupting am I?”
“Um, actually,” Heather says angrily, but softens her tone and says, “It’s fine Cosmic River.”
“Thanks,” Cosmic River says. “Listen the truth is…I’m the one who voted for Heather last night.”
“WHAT?” Heather asks. She prepares to yell but Bradley gives her a look.
“I’m sorry to cause your freak out man,” Cosmic River apologizes. “But after the way you’ve been treating people and almost squished that caterpillar I just didn’t think you deserved to stay. You’re just hurting people’s feelings. But I’m sorry for hurting your feelings and making you go ape.”
“…It’s ok,” Heather replies. “I realize that I have been acting really mean. It’s just how the prize money was unfairly taken from me in Season Three. But I’m going to start acting nicer from now on.”
“That’s groovy!” Cosmic River says patting Heather on her back. “And if you have any problems you need to talk about my ears are always open.”
“I’ll remember that,” Heather says. “Now if you could excuse me and Bradley we have something we need to talk about.”
“Oh, sure thing cats,” The hippie replies and leaves the two.
As soon as he is out of earshot Heather states, “Barbie can wait, he’s next to go.”
Bradley smirks and replies, “I agree completely. While were on the subject of elimination, why did you vote for Barbie?”
“I didn’t,” Heather replies. “I voted for Duncan. I have no idea who did that.”
“Well it doesn’t matter,” Bradley replies. “We’re still in power.”
The two walk away. As they do, a pencil falls out of the air vents. The arm of a familiar kid detective grabs the pencil and pulls it back up.
End of Flashback
“So do you know who voted for Barbie?” Rosamond asks.
“And who was crying in the confessional?” Courtney asks.
“Based on the conversation I believe Barbie was the one crying,” Nate replies. “Since Heather exploded at her because she believes Barbie voted for her. And as for who voted for Barbie…based on what I know about Barbie and the alliances on The Bulldogs, the most logical culprit is…”
“Attention all contestants!” Chris says over P.A. system, “Everyone meet in the elimination room. NOW!”
“I’ll tell you on the way,” Nate says.
...It's Always The Quiet Ones...
Later, the majority of contestants are sitting in the elimination room.
“That makes sense,” Rosamond replies after Nate explains his theory. At the same time The Fun Bunch chatter amongst themselves, Bridgette pats Geoff lab while still using the computer. Cosmic River is meditating. …And Bradley’s alliance discusses the elimination.
“So if we all voted for Duncan, Duncan voted for Heather, and Cosmic River voted for Heather then who voted for Barbie?” Chef asks.
“Speak of the devil,” Heather calls as Barbie walks in. “You’re the last one to show up. You get lost in the kitchen?”
Heather laughs and turns around back to her alliance.
“I think your theory is right,” Jovi whispers to Nate.
“Hmm…” Bridgette says reading the computer.
“Let’s get started here in a second,” Chris whispers to his co-host.
“You're so awesome Cody!” Sierra cheers.
“…Heather do you know what a hole is, like a hole in a ground?” A quiet, new, slow voice says. It sounds somewhat emotionless, yet hints of anger and sadness can be heard through it.
“What?” Heather asks. “Of course I do. Who's asking?”
“Good…go die in one as shallow as you b****,” The voice replies.
The room grows silent and everyone turns to where the voice came from. Barbie.
“Did you just cuss, at me?” Heather asks Barbie.
“Are you self-centered and vapid?” Barbie replies.
“Are you talking?” Lindsay asks.
“Well my lips are moving and words are coming out,” Barbie replies.
“You cussed me?” Heather asks. “You can’t do that!”
“Why not?” Barbie asks unmoving. “You and the rest of your alliance have ridiculed, teased, yelled, framed and even physically hurt me. If you don’t like it, don’t treat others that way. You think you would have learned that after being made fun of for being fat and having bad acne when you were younger.”
“What?” Heather asks, surprised. “I…I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Don’t deny the truth Heather,” Barbie replies. “I’ve heard the stories and even caught me a glimpse of a photo of you. I saw the resemblance. I would feel sorry for you, but a monster doesn’t deserve sympathy.”
“Where did you hear that lie?” Heather asks.
“It’s not a lie,” Barbie replies. “And I heard it from the interns.”
“Interns?” Bradley asks. “What do the interns say? I’ve never heard them?”
“See, when you don’t ever talk you get use to the quiet and develop great hearing,” Barbie replies. “I heard the interns talking while everyone else was distracted with drama. I found there meetings near a part of the economy class and have heard everything they said. See, after seeing many of their own die again and again, they’ve taken up drinking. It doesn’t take but a few glasses and the interns are drunk. And they drink a lot more than a few glasses. And they talk about everything.”
“Everything?” Bradley asks nervously.
“Sometimes they do trivial babbling,” Barbie replies. “Placing bets on who wins the five million. They talk about rumors like Rhonda’s true gender, or Chris’ age or why Chef wears dresses or who will hook up. Pointless rumors they fabricated in their intoxicated state. But sometimes they tell secrets about the show. To avoid the realization of their impending death, they gossip about tons of secrets. And I’ve heard so many. I know about Gwen’s former plan to eliminate Julie, I know about the school related problem someone is facing, I know about Duncan be framed for those cravings, I know about all the alliances, I know about challenges in advance, I know about an intern’s secret identity, I know about someone’s secret crush…I have some of the most influential, game changing knowledge.”
“Why haven’t you ever used it?” Bradley asks.
“Because I’m not manipulative or antagonistic,” Barbie replies. “I respect people’s privacy. And originally, I didn’t want to be here. All I have endured is bullying. When you bumped into me back at the day of the outback challenge, my hand was cut from the shattered glass. And you just yelled me. Everyone treats me like crap. I even voted for myself last night hoping to be voted off. But now I’m sick and tired of being abused and mistreated. And I won’t leave this show until I’ve made sure you are eliminated Heather.”
“You have no chance of eliminating me,” Heather replies, though a hint of confidence is heard.
“Really?” Barbie replies. “I have tons of knowledge. And I have a few other game changing surprises that might sway your opinion.”
And with that, Barbie quietly took her seat, far away from any other competitors, just like she always did. She didn’t do it with any noise; she was silent like she always is. She gave no emotion on her the face than her usual look; no look of smug satisfaction or glee. Just her usual quiet demeanor and depressed look.
Everyone was dead silent. Even Chris and Rhonda. Barbie had pointed the obvious death of the interns, which they had over looked and seemed rather horrible, especially considering it lead to alcoholism. But a few others had been intelligent enough to pick up on another fact.
“…So,” Chris says after a few silent minutes. “Let’s get to the point of this meeting…”
“…Um Chip,” Lindsay interrupts. “I don’t mean to be rude, especially considering it seems rude to the interns, but Barbie mentioned something up five million dollars. Wasn’t the prize a million dollars?”
Chris sighs and says, “It isn’t a done deal, but the new network wants to raise the prize money a smidge.”
“You call four million extra dollars a smidge?” Courtney asks ticked off. “Anything else you’re holding out on us?”
Rhonda raises her eyebrow at Chris, who sighs.
“There actually is?” Courtney asks.
“The network doesn’t want to reuse you guys again and again,” Chris replies. “They want to use a new cast every time.”
"So you mean we won’t have to do this over and over again?” Bridgette asks surprised yet somewhat happy.
“Well we might do seasons where you come back,” Chris replies. “It’s still in the works, so it isn’t a yes. But technically yes.”
“Does this mean we can keep the prize?” Bridgette asks.
“Yes it does,” Chris replies. “Apparently fans don’t like it that it gets destroyed each time.”
“So this means it might be are last time for the money?” Noah asks.
“Consider it that way,” Chris replies. “Now back to the matter at hand. Rhonda, the floor is yours.”
“Thank you Chris,” Rhonda replies stepping forward. “Has some of you may have heard, Jersey Shore has become extremely dangerous.”
“What happened?” Rosamond asks.
“I guess I should explain the whole situation,” Rhonda replies.
So Rhonda told the contestants all that the news had said about the tragedy in Jersey Shore. But we did that in an earlier scene, so nothing could be gained by repeating it here. So you know you probably skim over this.
“…And so that’s the development in Jersey,” Rhonda says finishing her story, which is the same story in the news report earlier, which nothing could be gained by repeating it so we didn’t include it. In fact, nothing was gained by repeating what we just said earlier. Is the author trying to make this longer? And why am I asking you people?
“So what’s wrong?” Sierra asks. “Is the tragedy interfering with our flight or schedule?”
“Sort of,” Rhonda replies. “Look out the windows.”
Some of the contestants’ eyes grow big as they turn out to the windows to see they are over a decimated Jersey Shore.
“Isn’t this area closed off by the military?” Geoff asks. “Couldn’t we get into tons of trouble?”
“Probably,” Rhonda replies. “But they’ve closed off the ground level. There is barely any air coverage.”
“Why are we here?” DJ asks nervously.
“Well as some of you may have noticed,” Rhonda says. “Two of our ensemble cast isn’t here.”
“Jenny and Toby,” Nate says. “I’m guessing they’re in Jersey Shore.”
“Yup,” Rhonda replies. “They sometimes like to travel on the ground. They jump out of the plane with a parachute; say they’ll meet us somewhere at a set date, and then show up there. Last time I talked to them they were In Jersey Shore. I haven’t heard from them since and I’m really worried. So today, we’re having a challenge.
“But it’s not time for a challenge,” Lindsay says, still looking at the horrible state of Jersey Shore.
“We know,” Mclean replies. “But Rhonda wants them back here. I don’t think it matters that much they’re practically intern…it’s very important we get them back.”
“Thanks Chris,” Rhonda replies with a scowl. “You guys will parachute into a safe area in New Jersey and find Jenny and Toby. You have two hours. After that, the plane will be on the outskirts to pick you and Jenny and Toby up. To find the outskirts just go north. Since this is a challenge, getting Jenny and Toby gets you immunity. Which means if one team can get both of them, then the other two teams have to face elimination. And if you get both of them, you’ll win an advantage for the next challenge.”
“It still sounds really dangerous,” Lindsay says turning away from the window.
“You guys have faced worse,” Rhonda replies. “And Jenny and Toby’s lives are in danger. Besides, what could go wrong?”
BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
“What is that!?!” Courtney asks as she (and several others) cover their ears.
“It’s the alarm,” Rhonda replies. “Which means the plane is about to crash into another flying object!!!”
“WHAT!?!” Everyone yells.
“Who’s flying?” Chris asks.
“Bobobo is suppose to,” Rhonda replies. She than smacks her forehead and proclaims, “He is probably on break! Union rules.”
“Well do something!” Chris yells.
Rhonda rushes to the cockpit. She runs in to see a military plane right in front of them.
“Um,” Rhonda says scared over the P.A. “I’m going to jerk the plane but we may make contact with this military plane, so…IF YOU WANT TO LIVE HOLD ON FOR DEAR LIFE AND PRAY!”
Everyone grabs onto something as the plane spins. It comes in contact with the side door of the military plane and breaks it, causing packages to fall out.
“Coraline!” Rosamond screams, seeing her cat clinging at the door. “Don’t do that! The door may open and you would fall out.
Rosamond rushes to the door and a pull off Coraline, but just as the plane spins. The door opens and Rosamond slides towards it. She throws Coraline to the bleachers, where she and the other cats use their claws to grab on. However Rosamond isn’t so lucky, and clings to the sides of the open door for dear life.
“Rosamond!” Jovi yells. “Hold on I’m coming to get you.”
“I can’t hold on much longer,” Rosamond replies. “Besides you fall out too! Toss me a parachute.”
“Are you crazy?” Jovi asks. “You can’t honestly think about going into there alone!”
“I’ll be fine,” Rosamond replies. “I’ll just make my way to the outskirts and meet you guys there. You need to focus on finding Jenny and Toby. Please trust me.”
“But Rosamond….”
Before Jovi can finish Rosamond slips out.
“Toss me the parachute!” Rosamond yells.
Jovi’s teammates pass her a parachute, which she throws to Rosamond who catches it before disappearing out of sight.
“The suction from the door is too strong!” Sierra yells. “We’re all going to…
She, and the rest of The Fun Bunch get sucked out, along with a bunch of parachutes.
“Hold on guys,” Jovi tells her teammates.
Courtney tries grabbing onto the bleachers tighter and says, “Easier said then…”
But before she can finish Team Indestructible is sucked out too. They all cling to parachutes that fell out too.
“We’re going to fall out next aren’t we?” Chef asks.
“Probably,” Bradley replies.
Then The Bulldogs get sucked out. DJ tries to grab onto but closes it instead, preventing anyone else from getting out.
“Now what?” Lindsay asks.
“Look more parachutes!” Bradley says pointing to parachutes that fell with them.
“When did this crappy show get the budget for all these parachutes?” Chef asks.
“It does belong too a new network,” DJ replies.
“What do we do now man?” Cosmic River asks.
“Simple,” Bradley replies. “We find Jenny and Toby and send the other two teams to elimination.”
…
…
…
…
…
…
PJ
What? Ugh…
Ouch…
My head hurts so bad…
…
…
…
PJ
What? …
What’s that smell?
(*Sniffs*) Is that smoke?
Rosamond open her eyes to find herself in the ruins of New Jersey, all alone. She looked to her left too see a building burning, producing the smoke she smelled.
What happened? Where am I?
…
…
PJ
There it is again! Who said that?
Rosamond looks around to realize she has a parachute on, which has been snagged on a hotel balcony, several feet above ground. She looks down to see a toad scurry off.
He wasn’t saying that was he? Nah, why would a toad say PJ?
Clink…
Rosamond slightly falls downward along with the whole balcony.
Oh crap, this balcony is going to fall off the side of the building. I’ve got to move now.
Rosamond grabs the parachute straps and twirls around to face the balcony. She grabs the top of it and tries to pull herself up.
Clink…
Oh no. Hurry!
Rosamond pulls herself up and runs across the falling balcony.
Clink!
The whole balcony falls off. Rosamond jumps, and crashes through the sliding glass and into a hotel room. …
…
…
P… Crash!
Rosamond looks down to see the balcony fallen onto the streets. She notices the toad, crushed under the balcony.
No…please don’t tell me the poor dear croaked. …No pun intended.
The little toad moves however, wiggling it’s way out of the debris and hopping off.
Poor Mr. Toad was almost killed. I wonder if he is part of that migrating group of toads that came from Revolution City and is heading to Tokyo. Poor critter must have gotten separated from it’s knot. And now it’s in a crazy place like this all alone.
…Just… like me.
Rosamond steps back on trips, falling on a bed. She breathes heavily.
All right Rosamond, calm down. Let’s remember what happened. I fell out of the plane but had a parachute. I fell out because I was rescuing Coraline. Wait? Where are my kitties? Did they fall out? Are they in this mad house?
…No, they were clinging to the bleachers using their claws. They’re claws are strong enough to keep them on the bleachers for a while.
Ok, so my cats are safe and as far as I know, my team and the others must have made it out safe. And they’re looking for Jenny and Toby, because I told Jovi not to look for me.
Ok Rosamond you’re on your own here, but you can do this! You will make it out of here alive, because you are capable enough.
Thanks me :D
Your welcome :)
…Wow. Thank goodness no one can hear my thoughts.
Rosamond sighs and gets up, looking around her enigmatic whereabouts. She looks and see’s she is in a small hotel room, with two beds, a small bathroom and a small TV. She shivers, feeling cold and trapped.
So what am I suppose to do? I can’t wait here, my team is depending on me and I can’t let them down or distract them from the challenge. I guess step one is getting out of this hotel. If I can get out...
No, I will get out. Yeah, I will...
Anxiously, Rosamond looks around and notices this thing she tripped over, a pink flashlight next a fairytale princess backpack, likely a little girl’s backpack left in the chaos.
Well, I found a flashlight and I can fill that backpack with other materials I may need.
Rosamond quickly picks up the flashlight and, after making sure the flashlight works, picks up and opens the backpack. The backpack has some snacks, an empty water bottle, big pink winter gloves and a pretty fairy princess doll.
The poor little girl must have left this. I should keep these gloves and doll to see if I can find her and return it after the show.
Over the next few minutes Rosamond scurries through the hotel to find things that can help. In the end Rosamond found a lighter and extra batteries.
Hmm, this place is filled with crazies though, so maybe I should bring a weapon, just in case.
Rosamond looks around and eventually settles on a toilet plunger.
Better than nothing I suppose.
Rosamond turns on her flashlight and opens the hotel door, and enters a hallway veiled in darkness. Quietly she walks forward and moves the flashlight around.
I just need to find the stairs and then I can find my team. I hope they’re ok. I can’t stand here worrying though, the more time I waste the more time my team is in trouble and I won’t let them down.
Rosamond stops the light on a staircase and rushes to it.
Here we go.
Rosamond opens the door, and after making looking before she steps, she slowly walks down the stairs.
I wonder what floor I’m on? I was pretty high up. These stairs kind of remind of the staircase back in my house, the way they curve. The darkness and the quietness remind me of home too.
…So does the emptiness and loneliness.
Rosamond tries to shake off her feelings of abandonment and continues to move forward. As Rosamond goes down a third flight of stairs she stops. The remainder of the stairs has caved in, leaving a giant hole several feet above dangerous rubble.
(*Sighs*) Just my luck. Well, nowhere to go but back up. If you can’t take the stairs, take the elevator I suppose. On the bright side it probably won’t be cramped.
Rosamond rolls her eyes at her own joke and climbs back up the stairs.
Eventually she makes it back up to the floor she started on, and re-enters the dark, gloomy hall. She slowly makes her way to the elevator and presses the down button.
The elevator creaks open, but there is no elevator. Only a seemingly abysmal entryway.
Of course.
Rosamond shines her light down the shaft, where she sees the elevator, far down in the shaft. She sees a small hatch on the top of it.
Hmm, what to do?
Rosamond shines the light on the metal cables holding the elevator and smiles.
Of course! I’ll slide down the metal cables and land on the elevator. Then I’ll either enter through the hatch and exit through the elevator door or climb around the elevator and continue down by sliding down the metal cables.
But how will I climb around it?
Rosamond looks at the toilet plunger in her hand.
Ok, so I scale down the elevator using toilet plungers. I’ll just grab another one from a hotel room, if I can find one open. This way, even if the elevator isn’t at the bottom or won’t open its doors I can still get out. Of course, the door at the bottom might not open, so I’ll be stuck in the shaft. But I’ll face that problem when I get there. In any case I can climb back up using my plungers or the metal cable, hopefully.
In the back of her head, Rosamond knew this plan had a lot of flaws and that the toilet plungers might not even work to scale down a shaft. In fact, they probably wouldn’t. But her plan didn’t rely on them; if the elevator’s door were open and she could open the shaft that is. And the danger of being in a highly toxic city all-alone with possible mentally unstable running around might have clouded her sense of reason. And she was a bit bewildered.
Besides she didn't have time to be bothered or afflicted. She had to make it back to her team. She couldn't wouldn't let them down.
After finding a hotel room that someone accidentally left open she took another plunger. She looked for other helpful things but found none, so she left, but made sure the door was ajar just in case.
As she went back to the open elevator doors she realized she might hurt her hands on the metal cables, maybe even getting rope burn from sliding down it. Luckily, she remembered the gloves in the backpack and realized she could use them while sliding down the metal cables.
I’ve got to thank this little girl.
After Rosamond got the gloves on and putting the flashlight and plungers in in the book bag, Rosamond got ready to go. Without looking back, Rosamond jumped forward and grabbed the metal cables. After she establishes balance on the cables, she slides down into the concealed shaft.
She quickly reached the elevator, landing on top of it on her feet, like an elegant cat.
Well now I just…
“...Hello?”
Rosamond froze. A voice, an unfamiliar voice, had just said hello. And it sounded like it was coming from the elevator below her…
…
Meanwhile, The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice, gets up off the street and find themselves in the abandoned Jersey Shore.
“Great,” Noah says, “Just where I wanted to go.”
“Don’t worry,” Julie says. “My mozzarella sticks are ok.”
“Well thank the Lord your mozzarella sticks are just fine,” Nellie replies from under Julie.
Julie gets off her friend and helps her up and proclaims, “Oh My Gideon, this is awesome!”
“Awesome?” Cody asks. “Were in the middle of abandoned street in a closed off highly radioactive area full of thugs and mental insane people!”
“Take a Chill-laxative,” Julie says. “This is going to be super exciting! Who knows? Maybe we’ll find some cool stuff here. This place could have sheep, gouda, mineral soap, Koko Puffs or Weapons of Mass Destruction!”
“I doubt they’ll have weapons of mass destruction,” Cody replies.
“Whatever,” Julie replies. “Were going to find Jenny and Toby and have an awesome kick butt Quimberly adventure! And Nellie will probably get hurt!”
“Why couldn’t I die during that fall?” Nellie glumly asks. “Wait where’s Sierra, Gwen, Mikey and SG?”
“Help!” A voice screams.
“That was Sierra!” Julie shouts pointing to a building, caving in. “It’s coming from that crumbling building!”
The team turns around and rushes to the building and finds their missing teammates in the building.
“Help my foot is stuck!” Sierra screams pulling on her leg caught under the rubble.
“Hold on Sierra!” Julie shouts as they rush up to her.
“Help me Cody!” Sierra screams.
“Gwen!” Cody shouts, looking for the Goth He spots her and pulls her out of the rubble.
Suddenly, a giant iron beam falls out of the ceiling and towards Sierra.
“Sierra!” Mikey yells as he tackles Sierra and pushes her out of the way.
“Mikey…” Sierra whispers.
“Come on,” Mikey says scooping up the uber fan in his arms. “Let’s get out of here.”
The team rushes out as the building caves in.
“Is everyone ok?” Gwen asks.
Mikey puts Sierra down on the ground. “You ok Sierra?”
“Mikey…”Sierra says.
“Sorry,” Mikey says backing up. “I know you don’t like talking to me. …I’ll go.”
Mikey rushes over to SG as Nellie comes over to help her up.
“You ok?” Nellie asks pulling the purple haired girl up.
“Yeah,” Sierra replies. “I’m fine.”
“Where is Julie?” SG yells. “Julie! Julie!”
"Julie?" Sierra asks.
“Over here!” Julie screams from inside a trashcan. The trashcan then tips over and Julie falls out.
“What were you doing?” Sierra asks.
“While running out from the building I fall into that trashcan,” Julie replies. “I met a real Grouch in there too. That angry homeless Muppet needs to get a job.”
“Are you ok?” SG asks rushing to help her up.
“I’m fine,” The crazy girl coldly replies.
“Let me help you help you up…” SG says grabbing her arm.
“No!” Julie says pulling away. “I don’t need your help.”
“I’m sorry...” SG says. “I was just trying to…”
Suddenly a scream is heard.
“What was that?” Sierra asks. “It sounds like a little girl.”
“It’s coming from over there,” Mikey says pointing down the street to a stopped bus.
“I think I see people down there…” Gwen says.
“And I see there guns,” Noah replies.
“What should we do?” Sierra asks Julie.
The purple haired wacko gives a mischievous smile and says, “…I have a plan.”
…
A little later three men with guns are shown holding guns to girl scouts heads.
“Why are we doing this?” One of them asks.
“You heard the boss,” Another replies. “He wants that crate that fall out of the sky.”
“So why are we watching a bunch of whiny snots?” The other gunman replies.
“I don’t think you’re in the permission to call someone whiny,” A familiar looking blonde girl scout replies.
“Pipe down!” The grunt replies. “I’m just saying why not go with the others?”
“Because the others don’t need us,” The second gunman replies. “It’s not like they’re going to run into anyone. I mean they have guns. One Eye Vinnie even has a machine gun. A *bleep*ing machine gun for goodness sake! Besides these little girls were following us.”
“I told you we were following you because we were lost and hoped to get directions or help,” A redheaded girl scout replies. “How were we supposed to know you were taking advantage of a mass tragedy?”
“Shut up fathead!” The second lackey yells. “And the boss says we could always use hostages.”
“But why would he want more when he has a room full of hostages?” The first gunman thug asks.
“Listen!” The third gunman yells. “Do you really want to ignore the bosses orders? How do you think Vinnie become One Eye Vinnie?”
“Right…” The first criminal says.
“…It seems forever since blue skies lit the morning. And you don’t put on perfect makeup anymore. Whatever it takes you gotta move on…” A hushed voice whispers loudly.
“Was somebody just singing?” The first gunman asks.
“Not me,” The second gunman replies. The third shook his head no.
“I thought I told you to shut up!” The second gunman yells.
“Wasn’t us,” The blonde haired girl scout says.
“…You caught the timing wrong. Bad luck, you missed the jackpot. Closing eyes won’t do the trick, they cover up the flaws…” The voice repeats.
“Who’s there?” The second thug shouts. “Show yourself or I’ll blast this kid’s fat head in!”
“Is it really that fat?” The redheaded Girl Scout asks.
“I said show yourselves!” The thug yells.
“Ha, ha, ha…”
Julie and Sierra jump on the bus…and they’re wearing team rocket uniforms?
“Prepare for trouble!” Julie shouts.
“Make it double!” Sierra yells.
“To protect to world from devastation,” Julie says.
To unite all people within our nation,” Sierra says.
“To denounce the evil of truth and love,” Julie says.
“To extend our reach to the stars above,” Sierra says.
“Julie…”
"Sierra..."
“Team rocket blasts of at the speed of light!” Julie yells.
“Surrender now or prepare to fight!” Sierra yells.
”Nellie that’s right,” Nellie says glumly, dressed as Meowth.
The thugs look at the Fun Bunch girls with wide eyes.
“What?” Julie asks. “I thought the choreography was pretty good. And we did do the best Team Rocket theme unlike those stupid new ones. Anyway, surrender those little girls! Seriously, it’s creepy.”
“We’re taking them for hostages!” The thug yells embarrassed.
“In those outfits?” Sierra asks. “The worst crime you’re committing is a fashion crime.”
“Agreed,” Julie says. “You look like something my dead cat Saint Pepper dragged in.”
“Let’s give them makeovers!” Sierra says.
“Or we could not anger the men with loaded weapons and get back to the challenge,” Nellie suggests.
Sierra and Julie ignore her and jump forward and put all the thugs in purple tutus.
“There,” Sierra says. “Don’t you feel pretty?”
“No!” one of the thugs yells.
“Really?” Sierra asks.
“Ok you caught me, I feel super pretty!” The thug cheers and spins.
“Now that your fashionable,” Julie says. “You ready to kidnap some little girls!”
“Yeah!” The thugs cheer.
“TOO BAD!” Julie yells and proceeds to punch one of the henchmen in the face.
“RAWR!” Sierra shouts as she roundhouse kicks one of the thugs like Chuck Norris.
“KICK IN THE NUTS!!!!!” Julie shouts as she kicks the thugs in the nuts.
“SENSELESS VIOLENCE!” Sierra yells as she starts screaming and rabidly biting thugs.
“EAT NELLIE SCUM!” Julie shouts as she picks up Nellie and uses her as a weapon, ramming her into thugs.
“I’d complain,” Nellie says as Julie bashes a guard with her. “But at least I’m not in the sack.”
“RAGGLE FRAGGLE!” Sierra screams as she claws the grunts’ eyes out and kick them in the gut. She does body slam on them and the spits in their eyes.
“MORE WORDS IN CAPS AND BOLD!” Julie yells as she jabs the thugs in their eyes, kicks them into brick walls and throws hot tea in their face.
The thugs ran away from the beastly girls in fear, as the girl scouts cheer.
“That was amazing!” The blond haired Girl Scout says.
“Well I hope everyone learned a lesson from this,” Julie says.
“Yeah,” The blonde haired Girl Scout says. “If a man attacks you, retaliate in crazed, unjust pain and break the man!”
“Well we’re glad we could help you and teach a valuable lesson,” Sierra replies. “But why did they take you hostage?”
“Well…” A brunette girl scout replies. “We had been driving all day in order to get our Jersey Shore Party Badge, Fried Pickle Eating Badge and our Beat Up Gudios Badge. After that we stopped at… a parking lot for a nap and when the explosion happened… we slept through it. When we awoke everything was destroyed. Our scoutmaster and us went to find help and we followed this van to see if they could help, but they pulled guns on us, and knocked out our scoutmaster in a surprise attack and then kidnapped us! But then you saved us!”
“Wait aren’t you the girl scouts from The Aftermath?” Cody asks.
“Yup,” The blonde haired scout replies. “Were Troop 909 of The Violent Violets!”
“Violent Violets?” Nellie asks.
“Cute name right?” The redheaded Girl Scout asks.
“Where is you scoutmaster now?” Sierra asks.
“Unconscious in the van,” A tan girl scout replies. “We know a medical center the military has set up which we can take her too, if one of you will drive us.”
“Well I can drive,” Sierra replies. “I got my license as soon as possible so I could go to different comic, anime and TV conventions.”
“Well what are we waiting on Hanukkah?” The blonde Girl Scout asks. “Let’s go!”
“What about Jenny and Toby?” Cody asks. “We have to find them for the challenge.”
“Uh… we saw them at the medical center,” The tan Girl Scout replies.
“Come on guys we can’t leave defenseless little girls in Jersey Shore,” Julie says. “Especially when it’s become the site of a major disaster!”
“Well we don’t have a reason not to,” Sierra says. “After they know where Jenny and Toby are. And it is better transportation than on foot.”
“Sierra’s right,” Mikey replies. “Come on, let’s go.”
Everyone crawls into the bus. Nellie gets in last…with a distrusting face…
...
At the same time, Team Indestructible regains consciousness, finding that they too are in the middle of a street in Jersey Shore.
“Ugh, what happened?” Courtney asks.
“I think we must have hit our heads on something while falling,” Jovi replies as she gets up and goes to help Courtney up.
“Like what?” Geoff asks as he gets up and rushes to help Bridgette up.
“Maybe we impacted the streets,” Bridgette replies as she stands up. “Though are parachutes are open.”
“It was probably something that got sucked out from the plane,” Nate replies as he helps Trent up.
“Are we in Jersey Shore?” Courtney asks taking in her surroundings.
“Yup,” Team Indestructible’s redheaded captain replies. “…Oh My God! Rosamond! She’s in here all alone!”
“Oh my goodness your right!” Bridgette shouts.
“Calm down,” Nate says. “I’m pretty sure Rosamond is fine.”
“She said to go on with the challenge,” Trent says.
“We can’t go on,” Bridgette replies. “Rosamond is an trouble.”
“She said she would be fine,” Trent replies.
“I’m with Bridgette,” Geoff states. “I think Rosamond is awesome…but I don’t think she is tough enough to handle herself. Especially without her cats protecting her.”
“What do you think Nate?” Bridgette asks. “You know her better than anyone.”
“Well,” The kid detective replies. “I am worried about Rosamond but I know she is very capable on her own. But this is obviously a very different situation. ...I don’t know.”
“Are really questioning whether to save our teammates life here?” Bridgette asks.
“We don’t know if she is in trouble,” Trent replies.
“She is in a hazardous city with gang violence, crumbling buildings and things burning everywhere,” The considered surfer replies. “How can she not be in trouble?”
“This is stupid!” Courtney yells. “We shouldn’t be here! We could actually die! This isn’t fair! Just…grr…UGH!”
“Calm down Court,” Geoff says.
“Calm down!” The future lawyer yells. “You can’t tell me to calm down! I’m a CIT!”
“Uh, what does that have to do with anything right now?” Nate asks.
“Uh, I’m leaving,” Courtney yells as she walks off.
“…Did she just walk off alone?” Nate asks. “Here?”
“Ok,” Jovi replies. “Me and Bridgette will go talk some sense into Courtney. You guys start looking Rosamond. Then will come help.”
“What about the challenge?” Trent asks.
“Maybe we’ll find Jenny and Toby while looking,” Jovi replies. “But that isn’t our priority. We’ll have our chances to try and win but a person only gets to live once as far as I know. And I know that knowing my friend will get to see the sun another day is much more important than a fame from a mediocre reality show. So we are going to find her!”
“You’re right,” Trent replies. “I’m sorry.”
“Come on we don’t have time to waste,” Nate says to the other guys. Let’s check the streets. You go and do what you need to.”
“Thank you,” Jovi replies. The two girls chase after Courtney.
“Courtney!” Bridgette yells.
“Go away,” Courtney replies.
“You don’t really want to be alone do you?” Jovi asks as the two reach her.
Courtney turns around and barks back, “I’ll be fine!”
“But do you really want to be alone?” Bridgette asks. “I know you’ve been alone a lot this season. You don’t want to be alone. Talk to us, we are your friends.”
“Don’t go acting bossy and angry,” Jovi says. “You’re nicer than that.”
“…I’m sorry,” Courtney replies. “I just…I just feel hopeless. Like I have no control, and I feel hopeless. I know that doesn’t make sense.”
“I get it,” Jovi replies. “You feel powerless, like you have no choice how things go. You didn’t have a choice in coming here and you’re thrown in an unexpected loop, and there isn’t anything you really can do to make it better. You just have to go blindly, with no say in the matter. I get what you mean, it’s hard to explain.”
“Yeah,” Courtney replies. “You think on this show that I would have gotten over it, but it’s never felt this real. At least Chris usually has this planned. Feeling like I can’t make decisions, it makes me angry, as you saw. I guess that’s why I acted the way I did in the second and third seasons. I felt like back on the island I was cheated when I was eliminated, and I couldn’t do anything. That and the drama and feeling so lonely, I just let it get to me…”
“Hey it’s ok,” Bridgette replies. “That’s the past. You’re not alone and we will get through this thing as a team.”
“You girls are so right,” Courtney replies as the trip hugs. “And just so you know I think we should find Rosamond.”
“That’s what the boys are doing,” Jovi says. “Come on let’s find them.”
As the girls run to the guys, they come running to them.
“We saw a shadow in a building,” Nate exclaims.
“Do you think its Rosamond?” Jovi asks.
“No idea,” Geoff replies. “Should we go looking captain?”
“We need to be careful,” Jovi replies. “It could be somebody who has had longtime exposure to the gas, meaning crazy. But it could be Rosamond. So…we should go check.”
“It’s very far away,” Geoff says. “But we’re all positive we saw a shadow. Come on follow us.”
Team Indestructible rushes off in the search for Rosamond…but if they only knew how things would go…
…
“Look I see Jersey Shore!” Lindsay exclaims as the Bulldogs land.
“I wonder why,” Barbie mumbles.
“What was that?” Bradley asks. “If you have something to say, speak louder?”
“Since when do you care what I think?” Barbie asks. “Oh wait, it’s because I’m actually a threat now.”
“No you’re not,” Bradley replies.
“Yes I am,” Barbie replies. “I have knowledge of everything going on in this game. Every team’s weakness, every player’s secret. I might even know one you want kept hidden.”
“Don’t have a cow cats,” Cosmic River says. “We need to stay calm if were going to find Jenny and Toby in this grotey place.”
“You’re right,” Bradley replies. “We already have a cow anyway.”
“Ha, ha, haven’t heard that before,” Barbie replies sarcastically. “Not like you’ve called me a cow before. Oh no, you do all the time.”
“I’m just saying the truth,” Bradley replies.
“Like calling you a manipulative b*****d is true,” Barbie replies.
“Are you calling me a b*****d?” Bradley asks.
“No,” Barbie replies. “That would be in an insult to b*****ds everywhere.”
“Shut up!” Heather yells. “You’re nothing but a fat pig!”
“Heather, you’re attitude is going to give you a crappy future,” The Barbie replies.
“Oh really,” Heather replies. “What do you see my future as?”
“I see you friendless, and having to quit college because some jerk you fall for knocked you up,” The goth replies emotionlessly. “He’ll leave you when he finds out and you’ll have no one. And when you’re all alone and depressed, I want you to look at your baby bump and think of me and how right I was.”
“You…”
“Calm down maggots!” Chef yells. “I don’t like her either but it is getting us nowhere to sit here and argue like stupid babies. No of us like Barbie and she will go, but now we need to kick the other team’s butts. So shut up and get moving!”
“Right,” Bradley replies. “Come on, and keep your eyes peeled for movement.”
The Bulldogs quiet down and follow Bradley, but after a few minutes, Barbie grabs Cosmic River and pulls him into the alley.
“Woe,” Cosmic River says. “What’s going on man?”
“I needed to talk to you,” Barbie replies.
“So why did you want to go to an ally?” Cosmic River asks.
“Because I wanted to get away from Bradley, and his lapdogs,” Barbie replies.
“What do you mean man?” Cosmic River asks.
“I guess ignorance is bliss,” Barbie states. “Don’t you see? Heather, Bradley, Chef, Lindsay and now DJ are in an alliance.”
“No, they would tell me if they were,” The hippie replies. “They’re groovy like that.”
“I don’t mean to be rude,” Barbie replies. “But Bradley and Heather are obviously leading an alliance. Chef is in with it and Bradley has Lindsay wrapped around his finger by pretending to like her. And now DJ is with them.”
“Did you hear that?” Cosmic River asks.
“I realized a lot of that before I heard the interns,” the goth replies. “But I did hear it.”
“That’s not true man,” Cosmic River says. “Why wouldn’t they tell me?”
“Because they want you on their side,” Barbie replies. “Until they need to you go or you have outlived your usefulness. Bradley is a jerk, you’ve seen the way he treats me.”
“That’s because…”
“Because I have fur luggage,” Barbie interrupts. “I know that is what he said to get you to trust him. You can check and see I don’t have it. He lied to you to get you to trust him so…”
“So I would support him and his decisions and I wouldn’t target him,” Cosmic River says, interrupting this time.
“Yup,” Barbie replies. “As you know he, Heather, Lindsay and Chef we’re partners in the amazon. They’ve been an alliance before this team formed. They tricked DJ into joining by framing me for almost poisoning his bunny and then rescuing it.”
“But why didn’t he tell me if this is true man?” Cosmic River asks.
“Because you’re non violent nature makes you weak in Bradley’s eyes,” Barbie replies. “He convinced DJ that you would get in the way of winning and taking his mother home by being non violent and too peaceful.”
“No…” The hippie says.
“They played Duncan,” Barbie says. “Bradley lied to him, gave him false promises about sending home Heather, made him feel like he was his friend, and had his alliance pretend to be with him. Then Bradley framed Duncan for the carving. He is the real one who wrote it. Bradley is bad; you saw the way he talked to me. And you know Heather is bad. Who didn’t care if they stepped on your caterpillar?”
“So…why are you telling me this?” Cosmic River asks.
“I know I haven’t been acting like it,” Barbie says. “But, I’m not a bad guy. I’m just tired of the way I’ve been treated and…you have been nice to me. And I want you to go far for that. So I want to form a sort of of…alliance against theirs. We do the challenges to get far but when it comes time for elimination, we vote Heather and weaken their power.”
“But the two of us aren’t enough votes,” Cosmic River replies. “It won’t be a gas if they have more.”
“We need to convince Lindsay and DJ to switch sides,” Barbie replies. “They don’t trust Chef and Heather fully. We show them the lies Bradley has used and who he is and we can destroy those crooks.”
“What if we can’t?” Cosmic River asks.
“Trust me, they’ll go home one way or another,” Barbie replies.
“I don’t even think I trust your story man,” Cosmic River replies.
“I’ll show you my bags on the plane,” Barbie replies. “And try talking to your so called friends about future eliminations or alliances. Now I’m sorry to take time from the challenge for you, come on let’s go back.”
The two leave the alley quietly. Most of the team doesn’t take notice. But Bradley does.
“Where we you two?” Bradley asks.
“Why do you care?” Barbie replies.
“Cosmic River is my friend,” Bradley replies.
“I didn’t realize pawn and friend meant the same thing,” Barbie replies.
“Don’t listen to her,” Bradley says. “She’s…”
“Oh my god!” Lindsay shouts. “I saw Toby run by!”
“I did to!” DJ shouts.
“Me three,” Heather replies.
“I didn’t see anything,” Chef states.
“So…why did you say anything?” Lindsay asks.
“Well everyone else said something so I thought I should!” Chef yells. “Why? You got a problem with roach?”
“Stop arguing,” Bradley says. “We have to find Toby. Where did he go?”
“Down that street,” Lindsay says pointing.
“Alright let’s go!” Bradley says running off as his team follows…
…
Meanwhile, a couple of thugs come to a corner where the crate that fell off the military plane.
“This the one the boss wanted?” A thug asks.
“Yeah, it has the code he said would be on it,” A one eyed man replies. “Besides it’s not like there are any other *bleep*ing crates anywhere.”
“Hey calm down Vinnie,” The thug says.
“Just shut up and load in the first truck will you?” One Eyed Vinnie replies.
The man shuts up as instructed and loads it in with some other men.
“Now what?” The thug asks.
“The boss wants you to go meet Ricky at the old theater and take his van back to headquarters so you two lugs and unload some items Ricky found,” One Eyed Vinnie says. “The boys here will collect some stuff from nearby buildings we could use as supplies.
“And you?” The thug asks.
“I’ll guard the package,” One Eyed Vinnie. “No one will get past me or my machine gun. We’ll meet you back at club. Now go on and get out of here!”
“But when do we leave?” The thug asks.
“Soon after the package is delivered to the boss,” One Eyed Vinnie states.
“But why did the helicopter not get it?” The thug asks.
“I told you,” One Eye Vinnie replies. “Some unauthorized plane knocked it down before the copter could get in position. So that’s why we have to find it. And now that we have, bode boom! Will be rich.”
“Is that plane why I saw people falling from the sky?” The thug asks.
“I told you no *bleep*ing people fell from the sky!” One Eyed Vinnie yells. “Now go!”
“All right, I’m going, I’m going,” The thug says leaving.
After he is gone, One Eyed Vinnie yells, “Now the rest of ya, go find something we can use!”
The thugs run off as Vinnie circles around the van. But what he doesn’t realize it that two things have left the crate. And one is still sleeping in the crate, along with their get rich scheme…
To be continued ...
Chapter 10 The Situation Part 2
Sitting in a green room next to a table with many awards on it, sits Chloe.
“Hey everyone!” Chloe says cheerfully. “As you may or may not know I’m in a different story where I think the world is a movie. But don’t worry, I won’t do any advertising for my story.”
As she speaks, the camera lifts up to reveal a giant neon sign that says Total Drama Idiots.
“Oh did you notice these?” Chloe says pointing to a table with many awards on them. Don’t mind them, they’re just all the awards I’ve won with my acting skills. Anyway, I’m supposed to summarize what happened last chapter of Total Drama What The Heck? Well, earlier Julie had returned and Cody and Nate debuted, with the former two being on the team with the long name and the former on Team Indestructible.”
“You know,” Chloe says. “I actually know Julie. I met her when I was filling in for my friend as an acting coach in New York while waiting for a call back. I met Julie in a class I was doing. She already knew how to act perfectly and was great at improvising. She claimed to be there for the free peanut butter cheese burrito hobbits. Naturally we realized we could talk the world by storm and formed a two-woman act called Broads on Broadway. It was about two soccer moms who had an acting talent and tried to become Broadway stars to save their kids soccer teams, but their newfound fame gets in the way of their goals, and their friendship. It parodied several famous Broadway shows yet was inspirational. And we wrote the whole script on the back of a Pizza Hut box. We hadn’t even eaten Pizza Hut. I wish my cast mates on Total Drama Idiots could follow a script like her. Or read it. But our run on Broadway ended after two weeks, when I got the callback. I left for a sitcom and Julie decided to go to and find a Polar Bear and film a Passover Holiday Special with it. I haven’t seen her since then, nor did I see the final copy of the special…”
Chloe blanks off for a moment, but then snaps back out of it.
“Sorry,” Chloe says. “Now where was I...”
Chloe pulls out a script and continues with her intro. “So Julie returned and Nate and Cody debuted, yeah I said that stuff. So Nate’s team got to know him better and he set out to find out who was crying in the confessional all night. And Rosamond tried to talk to SG but he ignored her for a computer, which made her worry for his sake. Meanwhile, Bridgette and Geoff continued to grow apart and Geoff learned he had done badly at school and missed summer school so he is going to get held back. But, Bridgette promised to stick by him. Wow, either she is a sweetheart, or dumber than toe jam and two eggs. Or a bit both.”
“Cody was happy to be back and be on the safe side but wanted to keep Gwen on longer. Yet, Sierra and Julie were planning playing more pranks on her, while Nellie felt like she didn’t want to torment Gwen but was worried about telling her friends.”
“Nate figured out who was crying! I bet it was the butler; it’s always the butler. No... it was Barbie! She was yelled out by Heather because she thought Barbie had voted for her. But Nate eavesdropped and heard Cosmic River admit to be the one who voted for her. But Bradley convinced Heather to pretend to be nicer so she wouldn’t be targeted. But that left the question as to who voted for Barbie? Nate had an answer but was interrupted by an announcement for a meeting.”
“Anyone else find the small amount of plot here confusing? Anyway, Barbie had enough of Heather and talked! She cussed, claimed Heather used to be ugly as kid, and said she heard tons of secrets from the interns, who drink to escape the reality of their impending deaths. That’s cheery… so Barbie also revealed that the prize money increased and that this would be the final seasons for the veterans for awhile.”
“Then, the meeting went on. Rhonda revealed that Jenny and Toby were stuck in Jersey Shore, which had become filled with crazy people and was all destroyed. The reason why you can read in the last chapter, because this explanation is way too long. So the challenge was to find Jenny and Toby, and if one team found both, the other two would both have to eliminate someone.”
“So the plane almost crashed into a military plane which a package fell out of. Rosamond was separated from her team, and everybody fell out of the plane. Rosamond almost died and got trapped into the hotel but managed to escape by scaling down the elevator shaft, but heard a voice from the elevator!”
Chloe takes a big breath and tries to finish, “The team with the long name saved some girl scouts, Team Indestructible went looking for Rosamond though she said not to, and Barbie tried to convince Cosmic River that the other Bulldogs were in an alliance and that they couldn’t be trusted. And some thugs found that package, which has something that make them money and had two things that left it and one that was sleeping in it.”
Chloe drops her script and exclaims, “This sounds like a cheap soap opera mixed with cow manure and fake laughs. Who writes this stuff?”
“…A poop-flinging chimp on drugs?” Chloe asks someone who gave an off camera answer. “Well in that case it’s pretty good for a…no, a poop flinging chimp on drugs should be able to write a better story than this. So anyway, who will win the challenge? Will Jenny and Toby turn up alive? Will Rosamond find her team? Who was in the elevator? Why is Nellie mistrusting? Will the Fun Bunch succeed in saving the Girl Scouts? Will Team Indestructible find Rosamond? What did they see? What will they run into? What did the Bulldogs find? Will Barbie get revenge? What decision will Cosmic River make; Bradley or Barbie? What is in the crate? What plans do the gangsters have? Will I win Total Drama Idiots? Will I make anymore guest appearances? I’ll go ahead and tell you that I make a cameo playing a character. See if you can spot me. Find out on Total Drama What The Heck?”
Chloe winks at the camera as the scene fades to black…and reopens in the abandoned streets of Jersey…
Click, clack, click clack…
Strolling down the desolate streets of this hazardous wasteland of society and the remains basically in shambles…put a smile on his face.
Click, clack, click, clack…
Trotting on down the pavement, he couldn’t help thinking this situation sucked. And it was all because of that day. Good, what a horrible day. His hair was still stained from it, though it now turned a charcoal black, and he had to admit it looked better than the bland color it was.
Click, clack, click, clack…
Stopping a puddle in the street, the sheep bent down to look at his reflection. Kynt was one of three sheep to have participated in some human thing, against their will. It was degrading and humiliating, and some fast talking human and dyed his hair purple and braided it too match her hair. She was just jealous her hair was not lush wool fur, Kynt thought. Kynt had managed to pull the braids out but ever since then life hadn’t been the same. When he was put back with the other sheep, they were afraid of him. It didn’t help that his wool coat would not return to its original color. It did fade to black rather quickly though, which Kynt honestly preferred. He was always a black sheep even before that day, now his wool showed it. Kynt preferred being alone and actually liked the exclusion. The other wacky sheep, Fluffy, didn’t made either, off in her own world.
The only one that was really affected at the time was that bleating chatterbox, Rose. She had actually enjoyed the human thing and befriended the human that had caused it. She returned with pink wool and a rosy smell to her. But she was deemed weird by the other sheep though, and was shunned. Little miss popular was no an outcast, which meant that Kynt had to endure most of her company. She tried talking to Fluffy, but it was pretty hard. So she often mindlessly chatted to Kynt who tuned her out and sometimes didn’t even speak. Not that it shut her up.
Click, clack, click, clack…
As Kynt remained motionless and thinking, he did think of when it did change. His herd was being moved from the Outback to some place called California, whatever that is. But because he, Rose and Fluffy were excluded and a bit odd, they had been taken out and shipped off in a crate for military study. If it wasn’t being bad enough being trapped with Idiot 1 and Idiot 2, the crate fall from the sky into this place. Then some weirdoes with their pants too low took him and the others and locked them in a truck while they slept! Luckily Kynt had woke up before the other two and escaped through a small dented opening in the truck, none the wiser to the men who kidnapped them. And he was finally on his own like it should be…
Click, clack, click, clack…
Wait a minute? Those are the sound of hooves trotting on the pavement. And he hadn’t moved from his spot in awhile…
Kynt quickly turned around to see his sheepish stalker. Kynt bleated in agony, it was Pinky Pie herself, Rose.
“Oh, hey Kynt,” Rose says as innocently as she can. “What are you doing here?”
“Do you have an excuse for following me?” Kynt bleats.
“Well I saw you leaving,” The pretty and pink sheep replies. “And I was worried about being in a van, and left alone with Fluffy, so I followed you. I didn’t think you wouldn’t like it so, I didn’t say anything.”
“You were right that I wouldn’t like it,” Kynt replies. “Get lost, I’m confident you have the stupidity to do so.”
“But this place is so scary!” Rose replies. “Besides how will I get to California?”
“California?” The loner sheep baas.
“Yeah,” Rose bleats. “That’s where you were going right? Back to the others?”
“Why would I?” Kynt asks. “They shunned us?”
“Yeah but we were suppose to go to this California,” The rosy livestock replies. “And maybe they’re over it.”
“Well you can go there,” Kynt replies. “I’m off to make my own destiny.”
“Well I’m still following you,” Rose says. “I don’t want to be alone.”
The black sheep sighs and asks, “Are you going to keep following me unless you find a way back to the rest of the herd?”
“Yes,” Rose baas bluntly.
“Then how about I take you there?” Kynt asks. “That way you won’t be alone and we can part our separate ways?”
“Eek, really?” Rose squeals. “Your so awesome Kynt! Thank you!”
Rose skips up to Kynt’s sides and happily walks off with him, much to Kynt’s regret…
…
“Hello?”
Rosamond froze. A voice, an unfamiliar voice, had just said hello. And it sounded like it was coming from the elevator below her…
For the next few seconds, Rosamond swore her heart had stopped beating. She felt like she was on death’s door.
She wanted to run away, but was petrified. She stood there terror stricken, trying to think.
What was that? Who was that? Oh my god! I’m gonna die, I’m going to die! I’m going to be found dead in an hotel, brutally murdered!!!
…No, calm yourself Rosamond. I will make it out of this place alive! I’m going to give myself a heart attack thinking eerie thoughts like that. I’m getting so worked up I can hear my teeth chattering in fear.
…Wait, my teeth aren’t chattering?
Rosamond stopped worrying for a second. She soon realized that the chattering teeth were coming from the elevator below her.
Not making a sound, she listened to the person below her. This person’s teeth were chattering, as she had heard, and the person was shaking in panic. But worse out of all Rosamond heard a sound she was very familiar with; it was a sad moan, a cry made when someone was trying their hardest to hold in tears but they let sounds like that escape. The stranger was trying to take deep breaths to calm themselves, but was releasing more of those moans of horror.
Rosamond had a hard time believing this person was someone who would kill her but she wasn’t a fool. She decided to be safe, so she would shine her flashlight below into the vent and see who was below her.
Taking out the flashlight she shined the light into the small elevator and saw the frightened stranger; a woman, likely in her thirties to early forties, was huddled in the corner trying to remain placid, and failing. As the light shined on her, the frantic woman held her hands up in surprise and fear.
“Don’t kill me! Please!” The woman shouted. “I have a kid please! Please!”
Rosamond watched as the grown women in front of her shook with fear and finally broke down crying. Rosamond couldn’t help but feel guilty for scaring the woman.
…This poor woman, she’s as scared, if not more scared, than I am. I should calm her down.
But before Rosamond said anything she stopped and thought if this woman could be putting on an act. Rosamond had to say it was very convincing if it was an act, which she was pretty sure it was not. But she had to think with her heart and not her head.
Looking closely at the woman she saw no weapons, not even something to hide any in. The woman’s pants had no pockets but she could hide them somewhere else on her body. Uneasy, she decided to find out why the woman was in here to make sure she could trust her.
“…Who are you and why are you in here?” Rosamond asks.
“What?” The woman asks.
“I’m not here to hurt you,” Rosamond replies. “Please just explain who you are.”
“…I’m Linda,” The distressed woman replies. “My name is Linda. I…I was st…staying here, with, with my husband and my sweet baby girl and we…we were going to go eat at this place we heard about and I was…was making my way to the car while my father and child looked for something, I think it was a camera, …when that explosion happened. I raced back to the elevator to find them…when it broke it down. I felt it jerk downward and then …shut down. …And I’ve been trapped ever since. Please don’t hurt me. I just…want to find my husband and sweet little girl. Please! Please don’t…don’t’ kill me…I don’t wanna die, not…not without saying goodbye to her! Please!”
“I won’t hurt you,” Rosamond states. “I’m getting you out this elevator and back to you’re little girl.”
Rosamond opened the vent on top and reached her hand down below in to the elevator.
“Come on,” The cat lover states. “I’m not leaving without you.”
“Why?” Linda asks. “Why…are you so quick to help me?”
“…Because a parent who loves their child is one of the most valuable things ever,” Rosamond replies. “Especially to their child.”
Rosamond lifts the woman up and says, “My name’s Rosamond. It’s nice to meet you.”
“ Like wise,” The scared mother replies, relived at being free from the metallic prison. “So…do you know how high this is?”
“Hmmm…” Rosamond says, curiously shining the light through the lower part of the vent. “It seems…the elevator jerked you to the bottom floor.”
“Of course,” Linda states. “I was in the lobby so we must be in some basement. But…how are we going to get to the doors when the elevator blocks the way?”
“…I don’t know,” Rosamond replies. “I’m really not sure what to do from here. I’m lucky to have made it this far! I’m guessing the elevator doors don’t open huh?”
“No,” Linda sighs.
“Well, maybe I can see if the panel does something or a wire cut in it,” Rosamond says mildly hopeful. Though she doubts it, she hopes to keep Linda calm. “You stay up there and pull me out if I need to.”
“And if it doesn’t work?” Linda asks nervously.
“I did bring those toilet plungers,” Rosamond replies. “I was planning on scaling back up with them if I couldn’t climb up the cables. We could each do one if we need to. But first let me just see if I can do anything in there.”
Rosamond lowered herself in, and quickly flashed the flashlight around, hoping to find something when that failed; she went to the panel of buttons and tried to see if she could do anything. She tried pressing a few, but to no avail. She couldn’t even lift it up to look at the wires.
“Dang it!” Rosamond screams as kicks the elevator doors open.
Suddenly she hears a ping and the doors slide open.
“Well that’s convenient and high unlikely,” Rosamond says.
Linda quickly jumps in, and the two rush out, just as the elevator doors close behind them.
“Well,” Rosamond says. “Looks like things are looking up!”
Then…the flashlight dies on them.
“…Of course,” Rosamond sighs in frustration.
…
Meanwhile, Team Indestructible had reached the building they saw shadows in. It’s a bit of a short building but wide.
“So this is it?” Jovi asks.
“Yup,” Nate replies. “This is it.”
After making sure the building was safe to go in, Team Indestructible entered.
“All right,” Jovi says. “It looks like there three ways to search; the ground floor, the basement and the top floor. Bridgette and Geoff will check the top, Courtney and Trent will check the bottom and Nate and I will check the basement. If you’re positive you don’t find anything, go to another floor and find someone else. And be careful, people have been said to be running around going crazy due to fumes in the air.”
The team nods and goes their separate ways.
Nate and Jovi walk down into the basement, and find a light switch after discovering it’s dark. The area turns out to be a large warehouse. The two begin searching.
“So Nate,” Jovi calls out as she searches a side of the warehouse. “Looks like your theory was right. Barbie did vote herself off.”
“Yeah,” Nate replies. “Wish I knew what secrets she does though, would be really cool as a detective.”
“Yeah,” Jovi says glumly. “Nate…do you think…Rosamond is ok?”
“I think you’re not giving Rosamond the benefit of the doubt,” Nate replies. “Rosamond isn’t a little girl Jovi, she’s seventeen just like the rest of us.”
“I know,” Jovi replies. “But you know Rosamond, she is a little scatterbrained and child-like and she isn’t with her cats, and they always help her. I just feel like she might not be as capable here, especially being all alone.”
“Rosamond may not be extremely serious,” The boy detective replies. “But she is very capable. And even though this place is crazy, Rosamond isn’t going to wait for rescue or go down without a fight. She is self-sufficient, she’s use to taking care of herself.”
“What do you mean use to taking care of herself?” Jovi asks.
“It’s not important,” Nate replies. “Let’s just keep looking. You find anything?”
“No,” Jovi replies bitterly. “And I suppose you haven’t?”
“Nope,” Nate replies.
“You know, when Rosamond would take about you and her as kids,” Jovi says. “You seemed a lot more serious.”
“I was a lot more serious as a kid,” Nate admits. “But, Rosamond loosened me up a bit. I don’t why, but she made me enjoy things a lot more the more we hung out. I sometimes feel like as a kid and a detective I have to prove my skills and myself. Around Rosamond, I feel like I don’t have to prove anything, I can just be myself.”
“Sounds like Rosamond is very special to you,” Jovi states with a smirk.
“She is,” Nate replies with a small blush. “But I know her really well, and while I’m worried about her here, I know she isn’t as bad off as any regular person, if she isn’t more capable than any regular person.”
Still smirking Jovi asks, “Nate, are you single?”
“What?” Nate asks, his face as red as a tomato. “I’m sorry but I’m not really…”
“Not me,” Jovi replies with a roll of her eyes. “I was just curious…”
“Why?” Nate asks, still blushing.
“I think you like Rosamond,” Jovi states.
“What?” Nate asks caught of guard and blushing even worse. “I mean…psh, no I don’t, I mean she’s really nice and…I mean…uh…err… …it’s that obvious huh?”
“So obvious,” Jovi replies with her smirk growing. “But it’s pretty obvious she likes you too. You should ask her out.”
“No way,” Nate replies. “First off, I think I would know if Rosamond liked me like that. If she said no, then I could ruin our whole friendship!”
“And if she said yes?” The redhead asks.
“She won’t,” The kid detective replies. “But if she did, we could still break up and our whole friendship could be ruined. And our friendship is way too important to me to put at risk!”
“But whose to say you’ll end up broken up?” Jovi asks. “You too clearly like each other!”
“She doesn’t like me,” Nate replies. “She’s way too better than me. Just drop it please?”
“Ok,” Jovi sighs. “You’re a nice guy and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable or do anything you don’t want.”
“Thank you,” Nate says. “And would you promise not to tell anyone else, especially Rosamond, about this?”
“I promise,” Jovi states. “And don’t worry, I keep my word. Now…you find anything?”
“I actually have found some food,” Nate replies. “But other than that and a bunch scrap metal everywhere, nothing good.”
“Funny,” Jovi says. “I found a lot of food too, still good. And a lot of scrap metal down here too. I wonder if it was in any other floors? Anyway, let’s go back upstairs and see if they found Rosamond.”
Sadly however, nobody found Rosamond. Trent and Courtney did see that some cabinets that had food, had been left open and emptied, but they believed it was before or earlier during the crisis.
“I guess our eyes played tricks on us,” Trent says. “Saw what we wanted to see instead of what was there.”
“Well we have to keep searching,” Jovi states. Everyone nods and leaves the warehouse, exiting in a parking garage.
As the team moves on, Jovi notices Bridgette looking down a hallway.
“You ok Bridgette?” The redhead asks.
“Yeah,” the surfer replies. “Just thought I saw someone… But I guess it was nothing.”
“Come on,” Jovi says. “Let’s go before we get left behind.”
But as the two girls turn around to catch up…someone’s arms grab them. The girls try to yell but cloths in the assaulter’s hands cover their mouths, gagging them. In a few seconds, the girls faint due to a substance on the cloth, and fall to the floor unconscious.
The assaulter laughs and quickly grabs the two girls…and carries them away…
When In Jersey...Die!
...
…As this was going on, Rosamond and Linda were still trying to escape. With the flashlight dying, the two ladies were trapped in complete and utter darkness.
“I guess we should find some light,” Rosamond says.
“If this is a basement there must be something that can produce light here,” Linda says.
The two searched for a bit until Linda exclaims, “I found something!”
“What?” Rosamond asks hopeful.
“I found some batteries,” The women replies. “Let’s try putting them in the flashlight and see if we can get it to work.”
Rosamond agreed and rushes over to Linda, and the two put the batteries in. Pressing the button, the flashlight turns on.
“Woo!” Rosamond cheers.
Linda smiles… but then notices Rosamond’s flashlight and stops.
“…Where?” The woman asks taking deep breaths. “Where did you…get that?”
“Get what?” Rosamond asks. “…The flashlight? I found it in a hotel room with this backpack.”
Rosamond turns around and flashes the light on the girly fairytale princess backpack.
“Oh my god,” Linda says..
“What?” Rosamond asks, worrying for her friend.
“That’s…my daughter’s backpack and her flashlight,” The frantic mother states. “She loves that backpack and all the things in it. How did you…get it?
“Oh,” Rosamond says. “I guess I haven’t told you that. You do deserve to know.”
So Rosamond told her the story of how she had ended up and all that she heard about what was happening on the Jersey Shore. Linda listened carefully and was able to calm down.
“…And here I am now,” Rosamond says finishing her story.
“I see,” Linda replies. “That’s amazing how you were able to keep going and pushing yourself. I wish I could do that. So if people have been reported being on the outskirts of Jersey Shore…do you think that’s where my family is?”
“If they’re still here and haven’t been evacuated,” Rosamond replies. “Then yes, I do. So that’s where we should probably go. Now come on, we gotta go!”
Linda nods and the two make their way to the door.
“Do you think we may run into any problems out there?” Linda asks.
“Maybe,” Rosamond replies. “People who have had a long exposure to gases in the air have been said to go crazy. But I’m not worried.”
The two climbed some steps and reached the basement door.
Linda’s hand steadily reached for the doorknob…but just stayed in the air. After a few seconds Linda started to cry. “I can’t…I just can’t…I’m too scared. I’m just too scared!”
“Oh no,” Rosamond thought, “This is all my fault. By trying to be self sufficient around a grown woman I’ve shaken her nerve. And now I’ve made her cry! God I’m awful.”
Shaking off her misery, Rosamond tried to comfort the mom. “Hey it’s ok,” The cat girl says patting her shoulder. “I understand, I saw what Jersey looks like now, and it’s scary. But I know we can conquer anything together. You’re just as strong if not stronger than me Linda. You will be fine.”
“…It’s not that,” Linda replies wiping her pale blue eyes. “I mean I’m scared for my safety. But it’s... it’s my daughter. Seeing you with her stuff having been left alone, …it worries me. Why doesn’t she have it? Is she or her father ok? Is she d…”
Linda chokes on her own words before she can finish and starts to cry again.
“Oh Linda,” Rosamond says hugging the woman. “You can’t think like that. If you think the worst then you’ll be overcome with sadness and fear and it will eat you up. You just have to think positive and hope for the best. You are going to find your family! I promise you! Don’t give up hope! Please! You’ll regret it if you do.”
Linda pulls herself together and takes a deep breath. Opening the door, the two make their way into the lobby.
“We did it,” Rosamond says smiling. “We did it! We made it out of this deathtrap! The door out is right over there! We did it!”
I did it. I managed to make my way out and even rescue someone. Who would have thought?
The two rush out the front door and outside, and even though it is dismal, they cheer.
“Now what?” Linda asks.
“Well,” Rosamond says. “We head south, I think. Although, we may need to find some kind of vehicle to get to the outskirts.”
“Well we’ll keep our eye out for one,” Linda states glumly.
The two walk south. However, as they turn a corner they walk right into…a one eyed man, holding a machine gun, who seems to be guarding a truck.
“Oh crap,” Rosamond states.
“Put your hands up!” The thug yells. “Or I’ll blow your f**kin heads off!”
The two raise their arms in the air.
“Please,” Linda says. “We aren’t trying to…”
“Shut up b**ch!” The one-eyed man yells.
This is bad. Ok Rosamond, calm down. He has a machine gun that can blow you up with a pull of a trigger. You have a toilet plunger. …Ok, I have to get the gun away from this guy but how? Hmm…wait a minute! Back on the show when we went to…no. That won’t work will it? I guess I don’t have much a choice…
“Move forward!” The one-eyed man yells. He had on idea who they were. Was Ricky right about people falling from the sky?
As they moved closer to the man, Rosamond looked over to Linda and gave a serious stare to indicate she was going to attack. Linda nodded and gave a look that indicated she would help.
“Now then,” the one-eyed man says. “You…”
“KICK IN THE NUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Rosamond yells as she kicks the man in his privates. Linda reaches forward and grabs the gun. The one-eyed man winces in pain while Rosamond and Linda (with the machine gun) leap forward into the van.
“Guess we found a ride,” Rosamond says.
Linda nods and drives off before the man can reach them.
I’ve got to thank Julie for coming up with that.
However the commotion the two women had made, awoken something…something in the crate…
A little while later, Linda and Rosamond were driving when they saw something.
“Look!” Rosamond says pointing. “It’s a club, with power! And there seems to be people in it! We are at the outskirts Linda! We made it!”
“Baaaaaaa!” A wild sheep bleats.
The two women look into the back of the truck to see a sheep with wild eyes.
The sheep charges forward and bleats wildly. A struggle between the two ladies and the sheep ensues…
A few moments later, Rosamond, Linda and the crate the sheep came from are thrown out in front of the club, while the sheep drives off, hitting several signs and fire hydrants along the way.
“Didn’t see that coming,” Rosamond states.
“You two!” A bouncer at the door yells. “What do you think your doing? And who is driving that truck?”
“Would you believe a sheep?” Rosamond asks.
Before the bouncer could say another word, a well-dressed man stepped outside.
“Mr. club owner sir,” The bouncer states holding the door for the man.
The man eyes Rosamond and Linda, along with the mysterious crate, which he seems to stare at.
“Hello there,” The club owner says as he helps the two up. “It’s nice to see some more survivors. Allow me to introduce myself, I’m…”
…
Meanwhile The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice are driving with the Girl Scouts to the medical center that Jenny and Toby were supposedly at. Julie is sitting in the back with the girl scouts who are enamored with her, while the rest of the team sits in the front, with Sierra at the wheel. A small door is in the back of the van, where two girls walk out from.
“How is your scout master?” Sierra asks.
“Um…she’s fine,” a tan girl scout replies. “But she still needs to rest.”
“Why can’t we go back and see her again?” Nellie asks.
“She’s gets anxious around people,” A brunette haired girl scout replies. “But we have medical badges and first aid kits, so she is fine be watched by us, so don’t go back there.”
“Speaking of which, I have the Broke The Fourth Wall Badge,” A blond haired girl scout states to Julie.
“No way!” Julie says. “You go girl! By the way, what are your names? I’m interested in knowing.”
“I’m Esme,” The blonde Girl Scout answers. “The brunette is Lacey, the redhead is Daisy, the tan girl is Cammy, and the blockhead eating all the cookies is Micky D.”
“Psh,” Micky D. replies. “I’m not letting these go to waste.”
“Hey… Julie,” Daisy asks. “Why do we exist?”
“Well that’s complicated,” Julie replies. “It has to deal with a lot, like character pages and users and…”
“Oh I know that stuff,” Daisy replies. “I just meant where do babies come from?”
“Oh, I get you,” Julie says. “Well for some cases like me, people are born different. There are also babies that are born from putting a picture and ravioli in a microwave. But most babies came from the Gull.”
“You mean the stork?” Cody asks.
“Uh no,” Julie replies. “How can you not know The Seagull's Tale? A human male and woman saved the gull from harmful trash, so in return he decided to deliver babies to the world! Though sometimes the Loon does deliver babies in return for lipstick, but that’s The Loon's Tale.”
“Cool!” Daisy shouts.
“But why does a woman’s belly swell when they’re going to have a baby?” Lacey asks.
“It has to do with the cockroaches and a buck getting revenge on humans,” Julie replies. “But those are different tales. Just remember, The Gull is an all-powerful enigmatic being that could end human existence if he wanted to. But he is so kind that it would not even think of such. It is the master of nature, and that is why we should respect earth and all it’s creatures, especially seagulls.”
“Wow,” The little Girl Scouts say, aweing in unison.
“Have you ever seen The Gull?” Cammy asks.
“No,” Julie replies sadly. “But my relative Wifey met the Gull once. She was able to talk to him with help from a Ravioli Pixie. She and the Pixie become the first Gull Whisperers, and she taught me how to be a Gull Whisperer. And one day, I hope to me the gull and maybe even fly with him.”
“That would rock!” Esme cheers.
“Hey Julie will you tell us the full story of The Seagull’s Tale?” Micky D asks.
“Well, I guess if we have time,” Julie replies. “Not so many years ago near an island not very far away, a seagull was hunting for fish…”
“Something isn’t right here,” Nellie whispers to Sierra, while Julie tells her story.
“Why do you say that?” Sierra asks as she reads instructions to the camp (from a sheet the Girl Scouts gave her).
“These girl scouts are very mysterious,” Nellie replies. “Their story has holes, they automatically seem to know who Julie is…”
“She is on TV,” Sierra replies. “And they were at the aftermath according to Cody. They’re just big fans.”
“But they have a strange connection to her,” Nellie replies. “They all wear purple and are called The Violent Violets. You have to admit that seems similar to Julie. And they won’t let us see their scoutmaster either. I don’t trust them.”
“I think you’re just mistaking coincidence for connection,” Sierra replies.
“They were talking about all that crazy stuff Julie does,” Nellie says.
“Maybe they’re such big fans they learned all the stuff she did,” Sierra replies. “Or they…”
Sierra stops the car, looking baffled.
“Are we here?” Esme asks.
“Well the instructions lead us here,” Sierra replies. “But…there is nothing here but an empty alley and a brick wall in the middle of it.”
“Ok, what is going on?” Nellie asks. “Who are you and what are you keeping from us?”
“What ever do you mean?” Esme asks. “We’re just innocent, pure little girls. So shut up booger head!”
“I don’t think so,” Nellie replies. “For one, you have some connection to Julie. You know the crazy stuff she talks about, believe it wholeheartedly and are called The Violent Violets. Violent and purple?”
“We’re just big fans,” Esme replies. “And we like Julie a lot because she reminds us of our troop name.”
“What about the fact that your story doesn’t add up?” Nellie asks. “I mean everyone stopping to just take a nap in a parking lot and sleeping through a whole disaster? It’s hard to believe but I might have let it past. But then you say you went looking for help and followed the van the kidnappers were in and they took you hostage. Yet you knew a medical center that the military set up? And you know Jenny and Toby are there? Why would you follow this van if you had been there and could have gotten help? It doesn’t add up? And now you’ve lead us to a brick wall in an alley. Care to explain this?”
“Um…” Esme says as she tries to think.
“It’s ok girls,” Julie states as she stands up. “I’ll explain this whole thing. Open the entry way.”
As she says that Elena pulls out a remote control and pushes a red button, which opens the brick wall and reveals a secret path. Cammy and Lacey rush to the front and pull up a part of the wall to reveal a secret button, which they press. The bus automatically moves forward and into the path.
“What is going on?” Sierra asks.
“Ok,” Julie says. “So this one time I was drinking some orange juice and I spilt it on a map and it left stains and so I said, “Ok, I’m going to build secret lairs there to hold armies of butt kicking Girl Scouts.” And that’s what I did!”
“What The Heck?” Nellie asks.
“It’s true,” Julie replies. “The Violent Violets are really a secret organization that trains little girls into be my personal army of assassins, blood thirsty warriors and ninjas for whatever purpose I may need. I must have built one in Jersey Shore. I didn’t remember until I saw them here and I knew they could take us to the underground lair. Now they can help us get out and retrieve Jenny and Toby!”
“How did you fund this?” Cody asks in disbelief.
“I have my ways,” Julie replies with a smirk.
“So does this mean you’re secretly rich?” Noah asks. “I mean they must sell a lot of cookies?”
“No,” Julie replies glumly. “Almost all the money goes to covering up things, paying for supplies and teachings or to producing more cookies. I don’t really get any money out of it, so I’m still kind of poor. But if I need to kill someone or take over something, I have army standing by!”
“Um, why is the ground shaking?” Sierra asks.
“While you were too busying asking questions the bus drove in the brick wall,” Julie replies. “It then drove into an elevator which is taking us to the underground lair. Now we can get help to win the challenge!”
“Is anyone else finding this crazy?” Cody asks.
“Actually, not really,” Sierra replies. “I kind of expect it from Julie. It does make sense coming from Julie.”
“None of this makes sense!” Cody shouts.
“I couldn’t agree more,” Nellie says. “But there is no point in questioning it. Trust me, you’ll never get the answers. But you will get injured.”
“Aw, you know we love you Nellie!” Sierra shouts.
We Go Together - Grease with Lyrics
The Theme Song to Nellie, Sierra and Julie's friendship.
“Yeah,” Julie adds. “Were like that Grease song. We Go Together! Can you upload a lyric video of that to the side of the page so people now what I’m talking about please?”
Suddenly the song Julie was talking about plays from nowhere…
“Really?” Nellie asks. “This movie didn’t even have a plot. And the best friend pregnancy subplot was stupid, with it being nothing but a scare. What does that teach you? Hope you’re not pregnant if you suspect you are? And the girl just ended up changing her whole self for the guy. And these words don’t make any sense. This movie is trivial and is ultimately pointless, like my most things.”
“Well it’s better than Grease 2,” Sierra replies. “Or Greece’s economy.”
“Hate to interrupt your fascinating conversation,” Noah states, “but we entered the building.”
Everyone looks out of the windows to see an underground laboratory. Deadly weapons hang on the wall, and mysterious personnel walk about. There is also free cookies samples near the bathroom, if you’re interested.
Then bus suddenly comes to a halt, and the doors open. Julie leads her team and the girl scouts out where they are met by a woman in a lilac trench coat.
“Hello Julie,” The woman states. “I’m referred to as Miss Lilac, and I’m a supervisor to the girls. They sent me a message you were coming. I hope everything is of your liking. Were sorry if the girls gave you any trouble.”
“The place looks wonderful,” Julie states. “I’m glad to see everything is running so nicely.”
“I trust your journey over wasn’t too hard?” Miss Lilac inquires.
“We ran into a lot of ruble,” Lacey states.
“No you mean rubble,” Julie says. “Ruble is a form of Russian currency. It’s ok, that dumb author made that mistake last time. We’ll kill her in a later chapter. But my journey over was fine.”
“Glad to hear so,” Miss Lilac replies.
“But what were the girls doing?” Julie asks.
“Well it is a bit complicated,” Miss Lilac replies. “But I’ll explain. Please follow me to this giant computer screen so I can show you some images to go along with the explanation. There is concessions sold in the main lobby and please silence all cell phones. Thank you.”
Everyone reaches the giant computer screen (although a stop at the concessions was made). After arriving, Miss Lilac begins to explain everything.
“You know the situation in Jersey Shore right?” Miss Lilac asks.
“Yeah,” Julie replies. “That factory mysteriously explosion happened and caused this whole mess.”
“Well we have reasons to believe that this factory explosion was planned,” Miss Lilac. “We had been intercepting radio signals one day, when we heard something interesting. From what we heard, this man was telling his minions to get his chopper ready… to crash… into a military plane. He had heard from someone he had held captive about something that would be…”a big score.” We had been spying on this man for three days before the explosion happened. From what we gathered, this man planned the explosion as part of a way to eliminate business rivals. But worse, he did it to cause a distraction so he could crash his helicopter into a military plane, to collect some sort of crate containing important things. It contains some important military device along with some other items made to make it seem unsuspicious.”
“So someone blew up the factory to get a distraction to get the crate in a plane?” Sierra asks. “Why would the military still have the plane fly with the national tragedy going on? And what about the people on the plane? And what is in the crate?”
“We don’t know what is in it,” Miss Lilac replies. “But it’s so important that the military plane still had to fly it even with this tragedy. And the plane was automated, it was set on a certain path. It is designed to change paths if it senses another plane, but apparently if the object comes from one of it’s blindsides at a fast pace, it can reach it undetected. We don’t know what he plans to do with it, but for some reason the explosion helps him get a way to use it to become rich. We were going to try and intercept the crate before they did but another plane came in contact with it, and knocked into Jersey.”
“Those group of thugs were sent to retrieve it,” Esme explains. “We were following them on to see if they could lead us too it, but we were caught and captured before we could find it’s exact location. The thugs left a few of them with us to take as hostages and the rest went to find it. We never had a scoutmaster or found Jenny and Toby. We are sorry for the deception.”
“The thugs likely have the crate,” Miss Lilac states. “And whatever it is, we are absolutely sure that it won’t end well as long as it’s in their hands.”
“What kind of man would explode a factory and kill millions of people for a crazy get rich scheme?” Mikey asks.
“Yes,” Julie says. “Who is responsible?”
“The factory owner,” Miss Lilac says. “…
“Paul Vito Mackenzie at your service,” The club owner said with white-toothed smile. He was a young man, with a nice tan and a muscular build. He dressed sharply, wearing a suit and tie that certainly looked expensive. He even had a fancy looking wristwatch. He also wore dark sunglasses on his head, which hid his eyes.
“Rosamond,” The Goth replies, as she shakes Mr. Mackenzie’s hand. “And this is Linda.”
“Hi,” Linda replies, though a bit distracted as she tries to glance in the club.
“What do I owe the pleasure of meeting you ladies,” The club owner asks.
“It’s a bit of a long story,” Rosamond replies. “But I’ll try to explain…”
Rosamond summarized the story of why she and Linda where as best as she could, but it was still rather long (just like this chapter >_>)
“A bit of a long story indeed,” Mr. Mackenzie states. “And a little confusing. So why is the van gone and your left alone with…that crate? Have you looked in it?”
“Well we were making our way here,” Linda explains. “When some crazy sheep comes out of that crate in the back and steals the van! We haven’t looked in the crate though.”
“Hmm I see,” Mr. Mackenzie says. “Well you seem fairly nice, and I understand why Linda here is a bit eager to get in. I’ll have my boys here take the crate in the back to see what’s in it and see if we can find a use for it some how. Sorry if they gave you a hard time. There just doing their jobs.”
“We understand,” Linda replies.
“As for you two, go in and find who your looking for,” Mr. Mackenzie says holding the door for the two ladies.
Before anyone can say anything more, Linda rushes into the crowd.
“Candace!” The frantic mom cries out. “Candace! Candace!”
Linda looks all around but doesn’t get reply.
“Oh Linda,” Rosamond says hugging her friend, on the verge of tears…Mom? Mom!”
Linda raises her head to see her little girl Candace and her husband. Rushing forward Linda picks up her little girl in arms.
“Oh Candace,” The reunited mother says. “I’m so glad your are ok.”
“I’m just glad you’re ok,” Candace states.
After greeting her family, Linda introduces them to Rosamond.
“This is my good friend and savior, Rosamond,” Linda says.
“It’s an honor to meet you,” Linda’s husband says shaking hands with Rosamond.
“Thank you so much for saving my mommy!” Candace says hugging Rosamond tightly.
“It was nothing,” Rosamond replies blushing.
“How did you do it?” Candace asks.
So, once again, Rosamond tells her story of how she got in the hotel and met Linda, and escaped and blah, blah, blah.
“And here we are now,” Rosamond states.
“Wow,” Candace says. “Sounds like you’ve had quite an adventure.”
“I guess so,” Rosamond says. “But I’d like to know how you and father got here.”
“Well we were looking for my camera when the explosion happened,” Candace states. “Daddy couldn’t find Mommy so we rushed out of there. We ended up getting caught in a crowd, which lead us here. We weren’t able to find Mommy and I was so worried. But now she’s here! The only problem is I left my backpack of all my favorite things, but my Mommy is fifty-gazillion times better than any item. Cause items can’t buy love!”
They sure can’t. This little girl knows more about being a mom than…
As Rosamond lost her train of thought, she remembered something.
“Oh Candace,” Rosamond says smiling. “Don’t worry about your stuff because…I have it right here!”
Rosamond hands Candace her book bag and seems the little girl’s whole face lite up.
“How did you get it?” Candace asks.
“Well I found it in the hotel room I landed in,” Rosamond replies, trying to refresh her memory of Rosamond’s story. “It saved my life back there. I owe you one!”
“You owe me one?” Candace asks. “You saved my mom and returned my stuff! I owe you.”
“How about we call it even?” Rosamond asks.
But the little girl didn’t give a reply. She was thinking about something. Smiling she pulls out a small disposable camera, and gives it to Rosamond.
“There,” Candace says. “Now you have a way to help catch your memories on your world tour!”
“You don’t have to give me your camera,” The Goth girl replies. “Keep it.”
“Do you have one?” Candace asks.
“I don’t need one,” The cat girl replies.
“But it would help you make memories,” Candace replies. “I mean you’re on an adventure. It’s important to make good memories and you’ll want to capture them.”
Rosamond smiles and takes the camera saying, “I guess I will but I’m going to return it to you ok?”
“If you’ll show me your pictures of your adventure,” Candace replies.
“Of course,” Rosamond replies happily.
“Rosamond, would you tell us about the show?” Linda asks. “I’m curious to hear about it. And I’m sure Candace would love to hear your adventures.”
“Yes please!” Candace says happily.
“Well ok,” Rosamond replies. “So the show is part of this teen reality series called Total Drama and…”
As Rosamond told her story, Linda smiled, leaning against her husband and holding her daughter in her lap. She was reunited with her loved ones and finally safe.
From afar, the club owner smirked.
“What a sweet family reunion,” Paul Vito Mackenzie says to one of his employees. “Perfect hostages…”
“We stored the crate in the back room sir,” The employee replies.
“Excellent,” The club owner replies. “We have had our fair share of setbacks, but now our plan will go smoothly…”
Total Deception What The Heck?
“Paul Vito Mackenzie?” Sierra asks. “Ok, I kind of get why someone would blew up the factory based on what you said, but the owner of his own factory purposely blow it up? Seems fishy.”
“Makes sense, no one would suspect the owner of the factory to blow it up,” Miss Lilac replies. “Besides, Paul Vito Mackenzie is a snake. The police have been investigating and believe he maybe the secret leader of the mob here, but can never prove it. We do know he is a very self centered man, vainly obsessed with his appearance and spends his money either on his business or his reputation. He owns a very successful nightclub, which we have confirmation is the only place with power and is housing several survivors.”
“But that still doesn’t explain everything,” SG points out.
“I assume you are aware that longtime exposure to the gas in the air drives you mad due to chemicals in it yes?” Miss Lilac asks.
“Yes,” Nellie replies.
“Those chemicals were released at the factory that manufactured spray tans and hair spray,” Miss Lilac states. “Paul had made sure when they went through the smoke stacks they didn’t contaminant the air to a great level. But inside the factory, the chemicals were still produced. Employees had to wear gas masks and hazardous proof suits. But Paul was too vain, and refused to wear the equipment. And it seems unknown to most people, he inhaled those fumes…which drove him insane.”
“Wow,” Sierra says. “A businessman obsessed with his appearance is driven insane by fumes in his business which is about helping your appearance, with his obsession
with his appearance being the reason. It’s an ironic and stupid reason!”
“The most dangerous reason of all,” Miss Lilac states. “We know this man is insane and has evil plans. He wants something in that crate, and there is not a doubt in my mind he is going to have that crate soon. We maybe doomed.”
“No,” Julie replies. “We will stop him! We will take the bus to the club, find the people and take them back to plane with us, and take whatever is in that crate and keep it from him!”
“Are you sure you want to do that?” Miss Lilac asks.
“No,” Noah replies.
“Well we are,” Julie replies. “Besides, if most of the survivors are in there, Jenny and Toby most likely are too.”
“Good luck,” Miss Lilac says. “We are safe underground here, so we will try to contact the military. We have been trying but no one is responding. We’ll just have to keep trying.”
“Thank you Miss Lilac,” Julie says. “And thank you Girl Scouts.”
“When will we ever see you again?” Esme asks.
“In a future chapter,” Julie replies.
So The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice left in the bus to fight evil…
... Meanwhile, The Bulldogs were shown running down the street, chasing someone.
“Faster,” Bradley barks from the lead.
“Has anyone caught him yet?” Lindsay asks.
“Of course, why else would the guy in front everyone else tell us to go faster,” Barbie replies.
“That’s what I thought!” Lindsay says naively.
Lindsay is shown in the confessional (taken place after the challenge). “Like oh my god, that challenge sucked. Why can’t we do a challenge at like the mall? If I win this show, I’m going start my own reality show that takes place at the mall! I’ll call it Total Drama Shopping Centre! I’ll even have my boyfriend Bradley co-host if he wants.
It will be like the best thing since that shoe sell I went to. I once had a dream about the show I’m going to host. A psycho tried to force-feed me lollipops. It was totally weird.
Anyway, I kind of saw where Barbara was coming from and thought Heather totally deserved, but then she goes and insults my boyfriend! I won’t have that. She could even start doing that to me. What if she starts being sarcastic to me! That would be sooooo… mean.”
“Quick he ran into that corner!” Bradley yells pointing.
Dashing into the corner, Bradley tackles the guy. He quickly pins the man to the wall.
“Whoa man, no need to be violent,” Cosmic River says.
Ignoring the hippie, the jock pulls the hood away, to reveal…Toby!
“Have we met before?” Bradley asks smirking.
“I doubt I could forgot such an ugly face,” Toby replies.
“Let’s cut the small talk,” The jock says. “Where is Jenny?”
“Since when did you care for redheads?” Toby asks. “You already have a blonde and ebon haired girl. You trying to make Bradley’s Angels?”
“Chef,” Bradley says letting Toby drop to the floor.
The hulking cook grabs the string bean boy and smashes him into the wall.
“Listen maggot! You’re gonna quit dodging the question like a pansy and tell us where that ratty brat is!” Chef demands. “Or I’m gonna shove my boot so far up your butt, you’ll be spitting out my toenails for years!”
“Bite me you old fruit!” Toby replies. “It will taste better than whatever meat is in your mystery meat!”
“You are awfully far away from your partner in crime?” Heather asks. “Tell me, is she near by? Or did you go your separate ways?”
“What do you care?” Toby asks.
“It’s not like I actually care about you or your life,” the queen bee replies. “But our challenge is to find you and her.”
Toby sighs and states, “If you must know, we got into a fight. I left her behind and am out here ok?”
“Aw, you and your girlfriend split?” Bradley states. “As much as we care, we want answers, tell us where she is?”
“And help you win a challenge?” Toby asks. “Why should I help you, or Dragon Girl or your Cross Dressing Cook! So go **** yourselves!
Chef raises the boy in the air while grabbing his throat.
“Do I know what happens to snot nose kids who get smart with me?” Chef asks smiling like a devil dancing in the pale moonlight.
“What?” Toby asks rolling his eyes.
Pulling him closer and whispering in his ear, the disgruntle chef states, “Let’s just say I end up with plenty of meat for a batch of mystery meat.”
With a quick jerk, Hatchet flings Toby into some nearby trashcans, then picks him up and slams him into the wall again.
“You ready to talk?” Chef asks.
Wincing, Toby replies, “I’ll take when your grow a pair of…”
“Wait why don’t we just trade Tommy in for Jennifer,” Lindsay states. “We only need one to win and I don’t think we’re allowed to bring both right? We can let Timmy lead us to Jamie and let him go and take her.”
“Lindsay,” Heather says glaring. “That isn’t…”
“A bad idea,” Bradley says grinning as he quickly elbows Heather. “Jenny should be easier to contain anyway. What do you say Toby? Tell us where Jenny is and we will kidnap her! It would be to a great way to get revenge about, whatever fought about. What do you say?”
“…Fine,” Toby grumbles. “But you promise to let me go?”
“Promise,” Bradley replies.
“…Jenny is at a club on the outskirts,” Toby states. “It’s where a lot of survivors are. I hotwired a car we can take to get there, to long on foot. When I left her, she was…”
“We don’t need your life story, just direct to the car and the club,” Bradley interrupts.
“Fine,” Toby replies. “The car isn’t too far from here, just down the sidewalk. I left to find some gas. I had finished filling it up and was going to leave, when you started chasing me and I ran.”
As The Bulldogs walk towards the car, Heather sneaks up to Lindsay, and whispers, “Did you really think those were the rules of the challenge or were you tricking him?”
“What do you mean?” Lindsay asks.
Heather sighs and whispers, “The rules are, if you get both you win invincibly and an advantage for next challenge, while the other two teams have to vote someone off. We are allowed to bring both back.”
“We are?” Lindsay whispers. “Then why did we tell him that?”
“So he can lead us to both,” Heather replies.
“Oh,” Lindsay whispers in realization. “That is a good plan. I wish I thought that.”
Heather rolls her eyes and walks ahead with the others.
“Your girlfriend is slower than a snail on a turtle,” Heather says to Bradley.
“And your green with envy like one,” Bradley replies.
…
“...Hmm?”
Jovi woke up, feeling dizzy. But that was the least of her problems.
Jovi was tied to Bridgette in a bunch of worn rope. Looking around, scrap metal and food supplies surrounded them in what seems to be the back of van.
Quickly remembering what happened, Jovi hears two voices in the front speak.
“Hate we didn’t find anything near the old theater,” The thug in the passenger seat says. “But glad we found those supplies in the building near by.”
“Me too,” The driver replies. “Though those kids snooping around was annoying. I told you they saw us.”
“…Hmm?”
Jovi turned to see Bridgette wake up. Quickly whispering to her to stay silent, Bridgette did as she was told, though for a few seconds she didn’t know why. Then she remembered the attack, and her she looked almost ready to faint.
“Still their snooping wasn’t so bad,” The thug in the passenger seat states. “We scored to young, hot ladies. You think the boss will let us…play with them?”
It took every ounce of courage for Jovi and Bridgette not to scream.
“You know he gets first dibs with lady hostages,” The driver replies. “Otherwise I would have done something with them already. But afterwards, we get them next since we found them.”
“What do we do?” Bridgette whispers.
Wiggling, Jovi manages to get her hands free, and unties her and Bridgette.
Swiftly, she hands the surfer and lead pipe, and gets one for herself.
“I’m going to count to three on my hand,” Jovi whispers softly. “And on three, we hit them over the head with these pipes, hard enough to knock them out. Then I’ll grab jump in the front seat and pull over ok?”
Bridgette nods.
“Are we almost there?” The thug in the passenger seat asks. “I want to get there, because the sooner we do, the sooner we can mess with these stupid girls. ”
“We’re almost there,” The driver replies. “You know, I wonder how smart these girls are? I mean, they were stupid enough to get caught?”
“Yeah,” The other thug replies. “Whose stupid enough to get knocked out? Still it doesn’t matter, cause we are gonna have tons of fun…”
BANG!
“What the?” The thug in the passenger seat yells. His head throbs as he turns to the side and sees his friend knocked out, and the redheaded girl take the wheel. He looks forward to see the blonde holding a lead pipe.
“You having tons of fun yet?” The blonde asks angrily. With a quick smack of the pipe, she knocks him out cold…
“That was a close one,” Bridgette says. “Thank goodness they were idiots.”
“Agreed,” Jovi replies driving.
After ditching the thugs on the road, the two decided to take the van, since it was faster transportation.
“Jovi look!” Bridgette says pointing.
Jovi stops and stares, a club with power is in front of them. And Jovi swears she saw Rosamond in it.
With a quick jerk, Jovi pulls up near the club and rushes towards the doors, Bridgette right there with her.
But before they enter, a large bouncer stops them.
“Excuse me sir,” Bridgette says. “But we saw our friend in there and we…”
“Where did you get that van?” The bouncer asks.
“Well we were kidnapped in it by some thugs but we escaped,” Jovi explains. “But we need to…”
“You aren’t going in,” The bouncer replies.
“And why not?” Bridgette asks.
“If I were you, I would leave because I’m getting the owner,” The bouncer replies.
“Why?” Bridgette asks. “Our friend is in there and we have been looking all over for her! If you left us take her we’ll be gone! Please, we thought she might be dead!”
“Go tell it to someone who cares,” The bouncer replies. He picks the two girls up by the back of their shirts and throws them towards the van.
“Now I’m telling my boss about you two,” The bouncer says. “And for your sake, I wouldn’t be here.”
“He can’t do that!” The surfer girl protests.
“Come on Bridgette,” Jovi says. “We’ll find the others and come up with a plan.”
“…Ok,” Bridgette says glaring towards the bouncer. “…But I’m driving.”
“…Um ok?” Jovi says.
“As Bridgette starts to drive away, she notices the bouncer turning his back and heading towards the club.
Making a quick U-turn, Bridgette slams her foot on the gas.
“What are you doing?” Jovi asks clutching to the rail.
“…Rescuing Rosamond,” Bridgette replies.
Quickly, she slams her foot on the break and slows down as she make contact with the bouncer.
“What the…”
The bouncer is caught off guard and flung down an alleyway, where he is not too hurt, only knocked unconscious.
Bridgette backs into the alleyway.
“What on Earth are you doing?” Jovi asks.
“This guy is seriously evil,” Bridgette replies. “I mean, he didn’t care at all. And he recognized this van! He must have known the thugs who kidnapped us, which means his boss does too!”
“I understand that,” Jovi states. “But hitting him with a van? A little risky, and I’m using 'little' loosely. And at least a warning would have been nice.”
“Sorry,” Bridgette replies. “So now are we ready to enter the club?”
“We may want to tie this guy up first,” Jovi replies. “And work out plan.”
“Agreed,” Bridgette replies.
...
As Paul Vito Mackenzie was setting things up on stage for a surprise, he noticed two unfamiliar people in his club.
When he approached them, he didn’t recall these two in here at all.
“Excuse me,” Mr. Mackenzie announces. “I don’t believe we met. I’m the owner of this establishment, Paul Vito Mackenzie. I don’t believe we’ve met. Why haven’t you I seen you till know?”
Bridgette and Jovi nervously turned around, and were prepared with the best excuse they could come up with, when suddenly…
“JOVI, BRIDGETTE!”
Rosamond rushes forward and glomps her friends in a hug.
“Oh so your friends of Rosamond,” Mr. Mackenzie states. “From the show.”
“Yup,” Jovi replies smiling. “The bouncer let us in as soon as he figured out the same thing.”
“Oh good,” Mr. Mackenzie says. “Just wanted to make sure you were someone who went crazy. Carry on.”
“What are you doing here?” Rosamond asks. “Where is everyone else?”
“We can explain that,” Jovi states. “But can we talk somewhere more private?”
“Sure,” Rosamond replies. “But first…let me introduce you to someone…”
…
“Wow,” Bridgette says. “So you guys escaped and made your way here?”
“Yup,” Rosamond replies finishing her story. “And then she was reunited, and the club owner took the crate.”
“I owe a lot to Rosamond,” Linda says. “She saved my life out there.”
“Hey, you helped me,” Rosamond replies.
“Well I’m glad to hear you were ok,” Jovi says.
“Did you find Jenny and Toby?” Candace asks.
“What?” Jovi says.
“You know for the challenge,” Candace says. “Rosamond says that was the challenge. She told you do the challenge when she fell out the plane, and not to worry about her. Did you find them?”
“Um…well,” Jovi says guiltily. “…We didn’t look for Jenny and Toby, we all agreed it would be better to look for Rosamond, so we looked for her instead.”
Seeing Jovi’s guilty expression, Rosamond glomps her two friends again.
“That is so sweet,” Rosamond says.
“You mean you’re not mad,” Jovi asks.
“If anything I’m the one who should be sorry,” Rosamond says. “I put you in a difficult position without thinking how it would affect you. The fact I got out fine in the end was just a miracle. You did the right thing and had the right way of thinking.”
“Come on Candace,” Linda says. “Let’s go find Daddy and let the friends catch up.”
“Ok mommy,” Candace replies.
As the two leave, Jovi remembers something.
“Rosamond,” Jovi whispers. “Remember when we were talking about having some privacy earlier? We have a bad feeling that…”
“Jovi, Rosamond,” Bridgette says. “Look over there at the bar. Isn’t that…Jenny?”
The team members look over to see that the redheaded minx is in fact at the bar.
“Wow,” Rosamond says. “I didn’t even notice her here. Man, I really need to focus more sometimes and stay on track and…oh they have free milkshakes! I love milk! Let’s go get some! Woo!”
Rushing towards the bar, Rosamond takes a seat next to Jenny. “One vanilla milkshake please. You guys want one?”
“I’ll take strawberry,” Jovi says taking a seat near her friend.
“You got milkshakes special with vegetarians?” Bridgette asks.
“I got just the thing,” The bartender (who looks familiar…) replies.
“Jovi? Rosamond? Bridgette?” Jenny asks. “What are you doing here?”
“We were sent to rescue you and Toby as part of a challenge,” Rosamond replies. “Soon, the plane will be here to pick us up, and you and Toby can leave.”
“So wait?” Jenny says. “Toby is going to be there?”
“Probably,” Bridgette replies. “We are suppose to rescue you and him.”
“Well I’m not going,” Jenny replies. “Me and that blockhead got into a fight and we aren’t speaking to each other. So I’m going to stay here.”
“What did you get in a fight over?” Bridgette asks.
“None of your business Snoopy,” Jenny replies. “If you excuse me, I’m going to from you Peanuts.”
Jenny storms off.
“Good grief,” Jovi says. “We’ll have to deal with her later. But we have other problems. We were kidnapped Rosamond, and we have good reason to believe that Mr. Mackenzie was the boss of those kidnappers.”
“Here’s your milkshakes,” The bartender says. “For the surfer, I had a special milkshake made of coconut and almond milk along with shredded spinach leaves, but you can’t even taste them.”
“Thank you,” Bridgette replies happily enjoying her smoothie. “What was your name?”
“Chloe,” The bartender replies. “I couldn’t help but over you taking about my boss, Mr. Mackenzie.”
“Oh,” Jovi says. “We weren’t…”
“No you’re most likely right,” Chloe replies. “Rumor is he runs the mafia around here, but the police have never arrested him, couldn't get enough evidence. During late nights I have seen a lot of creepy people in this joint. Sometimes, I’ve seen some people come in here with Mr. Mackenzie after night. They go to one of the soundproof rooms in the back…and I’ve never seen them come out.”
“You mean he is a bad guy?” Rosamond asks. “But he has helped as these people in the tragedy. Why would he give them shelter?”
“Don’t know,” Chloe replies. “But get this, he is the owner of the factory that exploded and started all of this. Is it just a confidence that he is also the only place that didn’t lose power on this whole block? And I have heard some of his associates talking about a crate he wants.”
“Oh no,” Rosamond says. “Me and Linda were in a van guarded by some bad guy that had a crate in it. When we got here, he took particular interest in the crate. The bad guy guarding the van must have been working for Mr. Mackenzie! He only let us in for the crate. Do you know what is in it?”
“No idea,” Chloe replies. “But it most be something nasty. It’s probably in that backroom there, where those two guards are blocking.”
“Wait,” Jovi says. “Why are you being so helpful if he is your boss?”
“We don’t have the best history,” Chloe replies. “I was trying to land a role in this show produced by a famous director. I’m going to be a famous actress you see. But the auditions were during work hours, and he wouldn’t give me the time off to go! I may have missed my big chance. Besides he doesn’t like my milkshakes. He is severely lactose intolerant. I had to fight to get the right to give milkshakes to the survivors.”
“Ok he is certainly a bad guy,” Rosamond says. “And these milkshakes are great!”
“Thanks,” Chloe replies. “I got some other customers. Good luck ladies.”
“Will we ever see you again?” Rosamond asks.
“Probably,” Chloe replies. “I read about it in a future script.”
“What?” Jovi asks.
“Nothing,” Chloe replies. “Just be careful, Paul Vito Mackenzie is a madman.”
“We will,” Rosamond replies.
“I believe in you,” Chloe says.
As the bartender leaves, the three teammates think.
“What is the plan?” Bridgette asks.
“Well,” Jovi says. “If we can cause a big distraction, I could sneak in through the air vents, find what is in that crate and take it before he could use it for evil. One of you would cover me and distract the guards or Mr. Mackenzie if they try to go in. The other causes the distraction.”
“But how are we going to cause a distraction?” Rosamond asks. “It is not like there is a thing we can do that won’t seem suspicious and can distract everyone?”
“Attention everyone,” Mr. Mackenzie announces, speaking into a microphone while on stage. “I know this tragedy has shaken us all, so I thought we could do with something to distract our thoughts. So I have put in my karaoke machine. So anyone up to do some karaoke for us all?”
“That is it!” Jovi exclaims. “Rosamond, you can go up there and sing to make a distraction.”
“What?” Rosamond asks. “Why me?”
“You won the singing contest remember?” Jovi says.
“Yeah, you have a great singing voice,” Bridgette replies.
“I don’t know,” Rosamond replies.
“Rosamond, whatever is in that crate is evil,” Jovi replies. “It could hurt everyone here or worse. Please do it for everyone here.”
Rosamond sighs and walks forward. “I’ll start.”
“Great,” Mr. Mackenzie replies handing her mike. “The stage is yours.”
“Um hi,” Rosamond says to the audience. “So…does anyone have any requests?”
“Friday by Rebekah!”
“Baby by Dustine Believer!”
“Do Molly Cirrus!”
“Do Carly Rae Jepson!”
“That’s not a celebrity parody!
“Oh do How Will I Know by Whitney Houston,” One of the bodyguards from the door suggests. “In another of such a talented voice.”
Whitney Houston - How Will I Know Lyrics
In Memory of Whitney Houston, who was a talented artist, even though I did a parody of her. No matter what she did, she was an inspiration.
“Considering the circumstances, that isn’t really right, but she deserves an apology, ” Rosamond replies.
“There’s a boy I know…he’s the one I dream of. Looks into my eyes. Takes me to the clouds above…”
As Rosamond sings Jovi and Bridgette move behind the bar and into the vent.
With Bridgette standing in front of her, she opens the vent and climbs in.
As Jovi disappears into the duct, Bridgette makes her way to the crowd of people listening, she sees Mr. Mackenzie talking to the guards at the door.
Rushing forwards she taps the businessman’s shoulder.
“May I help you?” He asks.
“Oh hi, it’s me Rosamond’s friend,” The surfer girl states. “The girl on stage.”
“How may I help you?” Mr. Mackenzie asks.
“Well I was just wondering…um why do we, or this place, have power?” Bridgette asks. Come on Bridgette, try and think of follow up questions…
“We have a backup generator,” Mr. Mackenzie replies.
“Um…” Bridgette mutters. “Um…what did you say? I couldn’t hear you over the karaoke?”
“We have a backup generator,” The businessman says, with a hint of annoyance in his voice.
“…Um…um…could you…elaborate on that?” Bridgette asks. …
Crawling the vent, Jovi eventually finds the room with the crate. It wasn’t much, so we won’t go into detail about it (and to make this thing shorter, since it is way too long). Let’s just say it had purple walls and wood flooring to give you an image.
There is the crate. Know to find out what is so important, Jovi thought.
The daring redhead lifted the crate. She shuffled around through the items, which seemed rather random; Gouda cheese, some soaps with minerals in them, Koko Puffs and...
“Oh my god!” Jovi cries out. “This is…”
“…Unexpected?” a familiar voice asks from behind her.
Jovi slowly turned around to see Paul Vito Mackenzie behind her. Holding a gun to her head. With his big bodyguards. Holding a scared Bridgette.
“I mean, a little teenage spy managing to get back here? You’re very brave kid. I’ll be sure to tell that to your friends that after I kill you.”
Jovi gulped. Well that didn’t go according to plan, she thought as one of bodyguards grabbed her. At least it went better than the final episode of Laverne and Shirley.
…
“…And then I saw this flower and it was totally cute!” Rose bleated.
Kynt sighed as he continued to listen to her gibberish. Someone kill me…
“Kynt!” Rose screams. She pushes him forward. At the same time, a familiar looking truck halts to a jerked stop right where the sheep were standing.
The door opens to reveal the crazed driver, Fluffy.
“Hey!” Fluffy bleats. “Looks like you two could use a ride! Where you headed?”
“We’re going to California to find the flock!” Rose cheers happily. “To find out what happened to them.”
“Going on a dangerous journey alone to solve a mystery?” Fluffy asks. “Sounds awesome! Count me in! I’ll drive you!”
Rose quickly accepted the offer and bleated at Kynt to join them.
I’m going to regret this…
But Kynt was just saved by the girl and made a promise to her, so begrudgingly, he climbed in the truck.
In just a few seconds later, Fluffy was off again, driving everywhere but the right place.
It’s going to a bumpy ride… Kynt thought…
...
At the same time, the Team Indestructible boys (and Courtney) were a little more than worried for their missing teammates.
“Bridgette!” Geoff screams. “Bridge! Bridge answer me!”
“Geoff, calm down,” Trent says.
“Calm down? Calm down?” The usually chill party boy asks freaking out. “My girlfriend is out here hopelessly afraid and in danger in a mad house! HOW CAN I CALM DOWN?”
“Pull it together!” Courtney yells slapping Geoff across the face. “Yes I know it’s ironic coming from the girl who had a melt down earlier, but freaking out and yelling at others won’t save Bridgette! Trent was just trying to help. And I think you should have more faith in Bridgette. She is strong and isn’t hopelessly afraid, she’s a lifeguard! She wouldn’t be one if she were cowardly. Besides she is with Jovi, so the two could be helping each other!”
“We don’t know if they’re together,” Nate states. “But we don’t even know if they’re in trouble.”
“They’re gone and we can’t find them!” Geoff distraughtly shouts. “They’re in trouble for sure!”
“Don’t make me slap you again!” The lawyer to be yells. “Now everyone calm down. Let’s use our heads here. Since the majority of people trapped are supposedly on the outskirts, then they maybe there. But we can’t there by foot, especially if we want to make it within the time limit. Seriously, who can find two missing people on foot in two hours! So, we have to find a way of travel. Any ideas?”
...
“Don’t raise your hands all at once,” Courtney scoffs.
“Well it isn’t like we can summon a car on command,” Nate replies.
“Yeah you’re right, sorry” Courtney replies. “Hmmm… does anyone know how to hotwire a car?”
“Are you suggesting we steal a car?” Nate asks.
“Not steal,” The C.I.T. replies. “I’m sure there is some kind of abandoned vehicle somewhere that someone isn’t using. Besides, we’re using them to potentially save lives!”
“Guys,” Trent interrupts. “I see a vehicle. And I can hotwire it!”
Trent rushes forward…to a motorcycle, which has two sidecars.
“Umm…I don’t know if we should right that and…” Courtney says.
“We don’t have a choice,” Geoff states. “Like you said, were using it to save potentially save lives. Nate and I will get in the sidecars and Courtney you grab onto Trent while he drives. You know how to drive this right Trent?”
“Yup,” Trent says already hotwiring it. “I work with motorcycles a lot.”
“Since when?” Geoff asks.
“About forever,” Trent replies. “It was mentioned in the TDI bios.”
“Those told the truth?” Geoff asks shocked. “I just thought those were fibs since a majority of what they said was never really mentioned.”
“Guess that means you guys don’t know about my successful book Total Triumph for Teens then huh?” Courtney asks.
Suddenly the motorcycle engine roars.
“We’re ready!” Trent exclaims excitedly.
“Let’s hurry,” Geoff shouts as they get on the ride and drive. “I’m coming Bridgette! I’m coming!”
I Need A Hero!
...
“There is no point in struggling,” The club owner says smirking.
But the two continued to try.
“What are you going to do with us?” Bridgette asks.
He didn’t reply, only chuckled and grinned like the Cheshire cat.
“What are you planning to do with those,” Jovi states.
“Whatever do you mean?” Paul asks.
“You know what I mean!” Jovi replies. “What is with that crate?”
“What about the crate?” Paul asks, still smirking. “It just has a few things, gouda, mineral soap, Koko Puffs…”
“And weapons of mass destruction!” Jovi yells.
“No point in yelling,” Mr. Mackenzie says. “I’m right here and these walls are sound proof. No one can hear you scream in here.”
He grinned evilly again.
“What are you going to do with those?” Jovi asks. “How did you get those…those…”
“Those are prototypes of new nuclear bomb being developed the American government,” Mr. Mackenzie explains. “They aren’t as powerful as a full on nuclear bomb, but one can blow up the entire Jersey Shore. The military was going to fly it in this crate to a new base. It contained those items I listed and some, now escaped, sheep, to make it seem unsuspicious. It was being flown in a path set by a computer, but can be moved through radio signals if something comes into it’s path. I had inside knowledge that this was being flown over and decided to steal the bombs.”
“So you blew up a factory to do it?” Bridgette asks.
“I blew up my own factory,” The evil man replies. “It had a giant insurance policy on it so I’m guaranteed to make tons of money off it anyway.”
“And all the lives including your factory workers that you took?” Bridgette asks.
“No skin off my bones if they died,” Mr. Mackenzie replies. “Anyway, I created explosion no just for the insurance, but to create a diversion that might distract the military so I could steal it. And to get all these people in here.”
“Why do you want all these people in your club?” Jovi asks.
“I’ll get to that,” The man states. “So, I jammed the radio signal so the plane would just follow it’s computer designated path. I was going to have my boys crash my helicopter into the plane and steal the crate, but according to your friend Rosamond, your plane crashed into. This was before my helicopter could. It knocked out the package from the plane and into Jersey Shore. I had two trucks some of my other boys were using to find resources in the remains of the city, you know to help survive and all that. I simply told one of the trucks that were in that area to collect the crate. The other truck was the one you came in. It appears Rosamond and her friend collected the crate when one of my men threatened them. They brought to me unaware and now I have it.”
“But what do you want it for?” Bridgette asks. “And why have all these people in the club?”
“Simple,” Paul replies. “They’re hostages. I’m going to contact the military on an untraceable radio signal and threaten to blow up one of the bombs if they don’t meet my ransom. They’ll have to put it in one of my secret bank accounts, which they can’t trace back to me, due to precautions I have put up. Then I’ll return the people and the bomb to the military after I collect my money. Of course, I’ll still have one.”
“What will you do with it?” Jovi asks.
“I’ll figure out how to make more,” Mr. Mackenzie replies with an evil smirk. “Keep making ransoms in return and gathering money until I can mass produce them all.”
“And then what?” Bridgette asks.
“Not sure,” Mr. Mackenzie admits. “Maybe I’ll try to take over the government with them. Or maybe I’ll just blow up cities full of people.”
He laughed at that idea, the idea of killing innocent men, women and children.
“Give the cast of your little show a thank you from me,” The club owner says with a smug smirk. “Thanks to them I didn’t have to do too much work at all. I have got to keep my nice helicopter in my club’s garage! I guess today is just a lucky day for me.”
…Will we get to see them again?” Bridgette asks nervously.
“Oh sure,” The deranged man replies. “Were sending you back…in a body bag! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA!!! ”
As the club owner laughed, his glasses fell out…revealing crazed red eyes that were bugging out of his head like popping slimy blood vessels. They stared wildly, ferociously and a little unchastely at the two captured victims.
Bridgette and Jovi tried to scream in fear, but their terrified screams weren’t heard by anyone...
…Except for Paul Vito Mackenzie…who only laughed harder…
…
“Thank you,” Rosamond says bowing. “Thank you very much.”
“Let us give another round of applause for the talented Rosamond,” Mr. Mackenzie says exiting the backroom smirking.
Rosamond gulped as the man shook her hand. She saw his minions take Bridgette away and saw him enter the door. She had assumed the worse, but what else could you assume when your friend was dragged away?
“I’d like to talk to Rosamond in the back,” Mr. Mackenzie states. “If that is ok with her?”
“Or I could sing another song!” Rosamond suggests.
“Come now I insist,” Mr. Mackenzie replies, patting her on the hug and giving her a friendly hug. He whispers in her ear, “Come with me or your friends will die. Or maybe I’ll stab that little girl to death.”
“Well if you insist,” Rosamond replies. I wish someone were here to save me.
Suddenly people rush into the club…who turn out to be thugs working under Mr. Mackenzie.
“Don’t mind those folks,” Mr. Mackenzie says to the crowd. “They’re just my people who have been out looking for resources to help us. Come Rosamond.”
Mr. Mackenzie pushes her towards the door.
Of course, Rosamond thought.
Then, a motorcycle busts through the front doors!
“Rosamond!” The motorcycle riders (Nate, Geoff, Courtney and Trent) shout.
“I’m so glad we found you!” Nate says, rushing out of the sidecar to you.
“Have you seen Bridgette?” Geoff asks.
“Or Jovi?” Courtney says.
“Keep them here I chop the little girl up into beefy chunks and force-feed them down your throat,” Mr. Mackenzie whispers.
“I was so worried about you,” Nate says squeezing his childhood friend.
“Oh Natey you,” Rosamond says pushing him off. “You’re so silly willy kooky crazy. Um Bridgette and Jovi are in Mr. Mackenzie’s office, this guy.”
Rosamond motioned her head to the man above her, who was scooting her towards the door. What the mob boss didn’t see was her eyes clearly showing fear as they motioned to him.
“They’ll see you in a bit,” Rosamond replies. “You know those two.”
“What?” Geoff asks. “But…”
“Come on Rosamond,” Mr. Mackenzie says pushing her towards the door. “She’ll be…”
POW! Nate punches Paul Vito right smack in the jaw, and knocks him to the floor.
Taking advantage of the moment, Rosamond moves through the door and starts to untie her friends. Geoff follows (though he has no idea what is going on) and quickly helps untie Bridgette.
“Bridgette!” Geoff yells picking her up in his arms and planting a kiss on her lips.
He pulls away, saying, “Sorry, I know you didn’t want to do that but I was so worried and…”
“You rescue me and feel bad over taking a kiss?” Bridgette asks smiling. “You are too good for me.”
She then kisses him.
“I hope you aren’t expecting a kiss,” Jovi teases as Rosamond frees her.
“Nah, your lips are too salty probably,” Rosamond teases back.
As the four rush out of the room, they find themselves surrounded by thugs with guns, who corner the four along with a confused Courtney and Trent. The bodyguards hold Nate, who seems to have been punched in the face in return Mr. Mackenzie grins at the four.
“Cute rescue attempt,” The madman says. “Now you all die together as team. Starting with Mr. Trench coat.” He takes out a gun from his pocket and holds it to the boy detective’s head.
“No!” Rosamond shouts.
“I got your hints,” Nate says smirking, despite the situation. “You would never speak like that unless you were trying to convey a message. And the eyes helped. …I’m sorry I didn’t rescue you Rosamond…”
“It’s ok,” Rosamond says frightened. “We’ll be ok...”
“I know you will,” Nate replies. “You are a lot tougher than people give you credit for. Please…make it out of here ok…”
“You are leaving with me!” Rosamond shouts scared.
“Denial, how sweet,” Mr. Mackenzie says. “But no one here is to rescue you know!”
Suddenly a bus comes crashing through the wall, knocking the bar to ruble and knocking out all the thugs but the door guards.
“Who the f**** just crashed a bus into my club!” Mr. Mackenzie yells.
…Suddenly, as the dust from the crash clears, Nellie, Julie and Sierra are revealed to be on the roof of the bus…dressed in kimonos?
“What in the…” Mr. Mackenzie says.
"Three Little Maids From School Are We"
"Everything is a source of fun," Nellie sings melancholy like. "Unless you're dying of thirst, or in poverty or you have Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease, or..."
“Three little maids from school are we,” The Fun Bunch sings. “Pert as a school-girl well can be! Filled to the brim with girlish glee! Three little maids from school.”
“Everything is a source of fun,” Nellie sings melancholy like. “Unless your dying of thirst, or in poverty or you have Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease, or…”
“Nobody's safe, for we care for none,” Sierra sings as she shoves Nellie away.
“Life is a joke that's just begun,” Julie sings.
“Three little maids from school!” The Fun Bunch sing.
“Wonderful!” The guards cheer, starting to cry.
“Thank you, thank you,” Julie replies as the Fun Bunch takes their bows. “Does anyone have any requests for us?”
“How about shut up and die,” Mr. Mackenzie replies as he holds his gun up.
“I’m not familiar with that one,” Julie states. “Could you hum a few bars?”
“Gladly,” The club owner replies. “He then fires a shot at The Fun Bunch who leap to the ground before they can get shot.
“Oh, I think I know that one!” Julie cheers. She then kicks the gun out his hand, sending it hurling out of the hole in the wall. “The jig is up Mr. Mackenzie. I’ve been sent here to stop you! I know your evil plan! You’ve gone crazy from the fumes from your own factory, all because you refused to wear safety gear for you image. You then blew up your own factory not only for a chance to cause mass chaos and destroy potential business rivals, but so you could send you’re private helicopter into a military plane so you could steal something from a crate in it to make money! But I won’t let you!”
“How did you figure that out?” Rosamond asks.
“I have my sources,” Julie replies.
“Well we’re here too and kind of delivered that crate to him, though we didn’t know he was evil,” Rosamond states. “But then he kidnapped Jovi and Bridgette and then we rescued them.”
“So wait, what’s in the crate?” Sierra asks.
“Well there was a sheep…” Rosamond replies.
“Along with gouda, mineral soap and Koko Puffs,” Jovi states. “To make it seem like a normal package. But it actually contains weapons of mass destruction!”
“What?” Cody asks.
“Oh yeah!” Julie cheers. “What now Cody! WHAT NOW! I told you they would have that stuff and you were all I doubt they have weapons of mass destruction. But I was right! Yeah, the crazy chick was right and Mr. smarty tacky sweater was WRONG! I’ll take my apology hand written please.”
“Uh, he has nuclear bombs!” Jovi shouts. “And he set this whole thing up to have a room full of hostages to threaten to blow up with them unless the military meet his ransom! Then he will escape and make tons of copies of the bombs. SOMEBODY STOP HIM!”
“Yeah we should do that,” Julie states. “So Paul Vito Mackenzie come quietly or I’ll have to get serious. And by that I mean the exact opposite, I’ll get even crazier.”
“You wreck into my club, reveal my plans and think I’ll just play along?” Mr. Mackenzie asks. “I can’t tell if you’re brave or stupid.”
“It depends,” Julie replies. “But I see there is only way to solve this…”
“A fight to the death?” Mr. Mackenzie asks.
“No,” Julie replies. “A dance off.”
“An odd request,” Mr. Mackenzie states. “But I’ll do it.” He rips his shirt off. “Shall we?”
“We shall,” Julie replies. “But I can’t take my shirt off because I’m a modest lady.”
“Depending on how you use modest,” Nellie murmurs.
“So I’ll just wear this cuddly bunny suit!” Julie shouts as she spins in circles and ends up in a bunny suit.
“Why?” Cody asks.
“I like my bunny suit,” Julie replies. “When I wear it I feel cute!”
“May we start?” Mr. Mackenzie asks.
“After we stretch,” Julie replies. “I don’t want to pull something.”
Mr. Mackenzie murmurs but allows Julie to stretch.
“Shouldn’t we stop him now?” Nate asks. Many of the others nod.
“It’s better to let Julie just do this,” Sierra replies.
As all this commission has been going on, The Bulldogs have entered the club. After finding Jenny, Bradley had Chef knock out Toby, before he escaped.
Bradley has been whispering to Heather and Chef, who still has Toby knocked out. They stop and he turns around to his teammates.
“All right,” Bradley whispers. “Now is our chance to win the challenge. The plane is here by now. We can go snatch Jenny and make it to the plane and send both teams to elimination.”
“But what about all these people man?” Cosmic River asks. “We can’t leave everybody to die.”
“We won’t,” Bradley replies. “We’ll tell Chris and Rhonda what is going on so they can wait or go back and help everyone. But it looks like Julie has this covered.”
“I don’t know man…” Cosmic River replies.
“Sorry Cosmic River the majority of the team is for it,” Bradley states.
“I’m not for it,” Barbie states.
“You’re not the majority,” Bradley replies. Before anyone says anything else, Chef has already snuck over to Jenny, where he knocks her out and carries her off. The Bulldogs make an entrance for the door.
Cosmic River stops and turns around.
“What are you doing?” Bradley whispers.
“I’m going to stay with these people,” Cosmic River states. “I’m not going to leave them, I just feel like I need to man. You go tell Chris and Rhonda.”
“No you are not,” Bradley replies. “We may need all of our members to win.”
“Let him do it,” Barbie states. “I think he is doing the right thing.”
“You’re just saying that so he’ll vote with you,” Bradley replies.
“No, I’m saying that because I would want to be rescued if I was trapped here,” Barbie replies. “And if he feels like staying here would be better than I would trust him.
“Are you done yet?” Mr. Mackenzie asks. “I don’t think I have the patience for waiting on to stretch.”
“No we’ve missed our chance,” Bradley murmurs.
“I’m ready!” Julie says as she strikes a pose.
“Good,” The crazed club owner says with a smirk…
BANG!
“Ah!” Julie screams as she clutches her foot and falls to the ground. Paul Vito Mackenzie blows on his rifle.
“How did you get another rifle?” Julie asks as she winces in pain.
“I kept one in my pocket,” Paul replies. “And now I have a hostage for the go. But just to be safe…”
Mr. Mackenzie fires another shot from his gun…and shoots Bridgette in the foot! She falls to the floor in pain.
“Bridgette!” Geoff screams as he rushes to her side.
“Geoff!” Bridgette yells as she winces in agony.
One of the thugs come forward and shoves Geoff away, then proceeds to grab Bridgette. He takes out a small gun and puts it to her neck, where he shoots a dart into it.
The other thug does the same to Julie.
“Julie!” SG, Sierra, Mikey and Nellie shout.
“What are you doing!” an enraged Geoff yells as he gets up off the floor.
“Since it seems my plans have been revealed,” Paul replies. “I’m going to need to make an escape. I’ve injected tranquilizers into these two, which will knock them out for a bit. I’m taking them and the bombs, in my car.”
At that moment, one of the thugs pulls up in a red car. He opens the driver door for Mr. Mackenzie as the other loads up Bridgette, Julie and the bomb.
“If you or the military try to follow me, then I’ll kill them both,” The crazed man states. “I’ll return them later at a ransom, along with the bomb after I figure out how to make more. Maybe let my boys rough up your friends a bit…maybe in a carnal kind of way, if you catch my drift. Maybe I’ll let them in my private chambers…”
“SHUT UP!” a distraught SG yells.
Geoff tries to charge forward, but again the hopeless party boy is knocked down.
Paul chuckles and says, “Did you morons honestly think you had a chance at stopping me? That’s not only a hopeless thinking, but it’s pretty pathetic too. You’re a bunch of rash, self-centered, hormone-driven brats and I’m a wealthy, genius, mastermind. You should be embarrassed if you even thought you kids could do anything useful. You think being on a reality show would give you a sense of reality. But I guess not. Now if you excuse me, I have an escape make…along with two…very pretty girls. And don’t worry you might see them again, …just not as fine and well as before I had them.”
Paul drove away, laughing and smiling, leaving a cloud of dust behind and the contestants in a dismal situation and depressed state as well.
SG bends down and picks up Julie’s mozzarella sticks.
“If only they could have saved her,” SG whispers.
Geoff begins to sob and Courtney, Trent and Nate pats him in sympathy.
“What are we going to do?” Rosamond asks.
No one replied.
“Well?” Rosamond asks. “We haven’t given up yet have we?”
There wasn’t a reply. The room grew quiet, with the only sounds being those of a few cries and sighs of hopelessness, for everything seemed bleak…
…
…
…The End?
Psh, not really. This story couldn’t end on a sad note like that. It could a note that breaks the fourth wall though.
“…The helicopter,” Jovi states.
Everyone turned to the leader.
“When he told me his plan,” Jovi explains. “He said to give the cast a thank you for letting him keep a nice helicopter in his club’s garage. If we’re lucky, we can get the helicopter and fly after before they get away, and take back Bridgette, Julie and the bombs!”
“You think that will work?” Noah asks.
“I didn’t hear anyone else give any ideas in that moment of silence,” Jovi replies.
“What about the people who were the guy’s hostages?” Rosamond asks casting a glance at Linda and her family.
“They can come with us man,” Cosmic River states. “We can take them out of here in the plane and tell Chris what is going on in this not groovy situation.”
“All right good,” Jovi says. “Everyone please fellow the Bulldogs to the plane!”
The people didn’t need another second to think and followed Cosmic River, who spoke to the people as he directed them out. The rest of The Bulldogs followed as well.
“Good luck cats!” Cosmic River shouted as they left and gave them a thumbs up. The two other teams responded with a thumbs up and some with mildly hopeful smiles.
“We can’t leave Rosamond!” Linda’s daughter shouts in protest before her family could leave. She stopped as the group went ahead and rushed to Rosamond, wrapping her arms around Rosamond’s legs. Linda and her husband ran after her.
“It’s fine Candace,” Rosamond replies patting her head. “I’ll be fine, everyone will be rescued, we are the good guys and the good guys always win don’t they?”
“Yes, but this different,” Candace states.
“Trust me Candace,” The teenage cat lady replies bending down to her. “Everyone will be fine, including me. We’ll see each other soon.”
“You promise?” Candace asks.
“I promise,” Rosamond replies.
“Ok,” Candace replies.
As Candace’s daddy picked her up, Linda hugged Rosamond and whispered, “Thank you so much for reuniting me. I’m so thankful for meeting you Please be careful.”
“I will,” Rosamond replies. “Now hurry and catch up before you’re left.”
The family waved once last goodbye, and rushed after the group of survivors.
At same time, Geoff and Jovi rushed in, having left earlier unknown to Rosamond.
“…There is a helicopter,” Jovi states. “It is in there and so are the keys. Geoff knows how to fly it. Come on, let’s go!”
No one had a second thought about as they raced off to the helicopter…
A little while later, the rescuers were flying in a helicopter. Geoff was piloting the vehicle.
“Anyone see them?” Rosamond asks.
“There!” Jovi yells pointing.
Everyone looked to see Mr. Mackenzie driving away in a red sports car, with the bomb in front seat and the two unconscious girls in the back, between two of Mr. Mackenzie’s men.
With a sharp turn, Geoff stirs the plane towards the direction. He flies a little to the side of them.
“Those monsters,” Geoff says glaring.
“Geoff!” Rosamond yells.
Geoff looks forward to see an oncoming building. Quickly, he turns by it, barley missing it.
“Ok,” Jovi says. “You keep your eyes forward Geoff or else we’ll crash.”
“But how will I see them if I’m not looking there direction?” Geoff asks.
“I’ll give you directions,” Jovi replies buckling herself into the passenger seat. “We can’t fly over them or they could get to good a shot, say stay to the side. Courtney, you think you can lead everyone rescues plan while I’m preoccupied?”
Courtney seems shocked but quickly smiles and says, “Sure thing.”
Looking around, Courtney notices a rope ladder and holds it in her hands.
“All right,” The C.I.T. says. “Someone will deploy this rope ladder up here. Then each of us will climb down it and then form a human ladder. Will be long enough to reach them and keep the helicopter at safe distant, though the helicopter will have to be lowered some. The person at the end just needs to quickly grab the two. Then the person holding the rope ladder will pull us the ladder than help us in, but we have to be as quick as possible.”
“You want to form a human ladder out of a helicopter?” Noah asks skeptically.
“You got a better idea?” Courtney asks.
Noah quickly shuts up.
“Who will be at the bottom?” Nate asks.
“I will,” SG volunteers.
“No,” Courtney states. “It’s my plan, I’ll be at the bottom to grab them. Nate you lower the rope ladder and be prepared to pull us all in.”
Nate nods.
“All right,” Courtney says taking a deep breath. “Let’s go.”
In a few moments, Nate has deployed the rope ladder. Trent climbs down first, and hangs down from the last step of the wooden ladder. Sierra comes climbing down afterwards and hangs her legs from Trent’s shoulders. Trent grabs her legs to keep them on his shoulders. Soon everyone follows, until they almost reach the ground. Courtney goes last, climbing down the people and resting her legs on Nellie’s shoulders.
“Get in closer and go lower!” Courtney yells. The human ladder passes the message back up to the top. In a second, the helicopter sweeps in lower and closer… ...
“Those fools,” Mr. Mackenzie laughs, driving like a maniac. “They have no way of catching us! Ha ha ha!”
“Eyes on the road boss!” One of the henchmen yells. “You’re driving like crazy!”
“CRAZY?” The madman asks. “I’ll show you crazy! HA HA HA!”
The madman drives even crazier, switching from the road to the sidewalk on a whim, and jerking the car in every direction.
The two guards look at each other and nod. They open the doors and roll out. Mr. Mackenzie doesn’t even notice.
At the same time, Courtney swoops in for the kill. The mad boss hasn’t noticed her, too busy driving like a maniac.
Courtney tries to grab the backseat passengers but misses.
“Hurry Courtney,” Noah complains from up above.
“Sorry if this driver got his license from a monkey on drugs,” The stressed C.I.T. hisses.
As sweat drips from her forehead Courtney once again reaches down and manages to grab something…
…One of the bombs.
“…Ha…” The driver wheezes as he turns around and grabs Courtney’s wrists. His sunglasses fall off.
Seeing the man without his sunglasses, Courtney screams and drops the bomb.
“Five minutes to self destruct,” The bomb announces.
“Looks like you’re smarter than I thought you were,” The creep states. “But are you smart enough not to get shout!!!”
“PULL UP!” Courtney screams as Mr. Mackenzie pulls out his pistol.
The plane flies a safe distance and tries to avoid Mr. Mackenzie’s bullets.
“Ah!” Courtney yells as she barely avoids a bullet.
“Nice try girly,” the madman says. “But you failed again! It was a pleasure doing business with you but I have somewhere to be.”
Mr. Mackenzie fires one final shot and starts to drive away.
“That creep!” Rosamond says. “He is a low down, shady, slimy, extremely lactose intolerant, underhanded…”
“THAT’S IT!” SG yells, who is holding Rosamond on his shoulders. “You’re a genius Rosamond!”
“What did I do?” Rosamond asks.
SG reaches into his pockets and pulls out…Julie’s mozzarella sticks.
“Julie knew these would help us here,” SG says. “And she was right! Quick pass this down the ladder to Courtney. If she can get this into his throat, we have a chance!”
“Brilliant!” Rosamond says. She passes them down the ladder and tells to spread the plane.
“Courtney,” Nellie says. “These are for you.”
“What?” Courtney asks as she takes the cheese sticks.
“He’s lactose intolerant,” Nellie states. “Very lactose intolerant apparently. If you can get this down his throat…we may be able to save them.”
“I don’t think I can,” Courtney says. “And that bomb is going to blow in three minutes!”
“Courtney,” Nellie states deadpan. “Try, you are a C.I.T.”
“What does that have to do with anything?” Courtney asks.
“I don’t know,” Nellie says. “I’m not good with encouraging, and you being a C.I.T. is always mentioned. We’re going to die anyway, like someone with Cysticercosis.”
Courtney takes a deep breath and yells, “Bring the helicopter in closer!”
The helicopter flies in closer.
“Hey Mackenzie!” Courtney yells.
“Well look who is back,” The madman says pulling out his gun. “You really…”
The madman is silenced by mozzarella sticks thrown in his mouth. He accidently swallows them. Soon he starts puffing up and developing rashes.
“It was a pleasure doing business with you,” Courtney says as she grabs Julie and Bridgette. “But I have somewhere to be.”
The helicopter pulls away and the ladder is quickly being pulled back in.
Mr. Mackenzie’s car crashes into a lamppost.
“One minute to self destruct…” The bomb announces…
…As the helicopter flies away from the Jersey Shore, the contestants see their plane.
The Jersey Shore
“We did it!” Jovi cheers.
BOOM!
A massive explosion happens, and Jersey Shore is wiped out (expect for that windmill in the picture, which I know doesn't make sense...but does anything in this story?)
“Yeah,” Nellie says. “We did it, we blew up all of Jersey Shore.”
“When you put it like that it sounds depressing,” Rosamond says.
“Put it like what?” Nellie asks. “Realistically?”
Separate Ways (World's Apart)
Later, outside of the former Jersey Shore, the plane is the back in the air.
“Well,” Chris says closing his cell phone. “The network says it seems nobody was hurt in the blast. Mr. Mackenzie’s body wasn’t found, or any trace of him really, but they are looking to arrest him. And all of his minions were found and captured, which means that no one seems to have died in the explosion you kind of caused, which means we most likely won’t be sued. And a lot of our camera equipment went all over Jersey and filmed everything! The military were able to scavenge it so, we may have a two parter!”
“And we were able to get all the hostages safely away off the plane,” Rosamond says. “And they are all safe!”
“And Bridgette and Jovi were given medical attention,” Rhonda says. “Julie seems to have not been hurt as bad as Bridgette, and will need to wear a cast and walk on crutches for a few days. Bridgette is ok though, she just needs to wear a cast and walk on crutches for a bit longer. Both will need to stay in the infirmary for a little while though.”
“The good news is that the girl scouts are ok,” Julie says. “They and their underground base weren’t affected because it was underground.”
“Why is everyone saying stuff we already now and went over?” Nellie asks. “It’s kind of pointless.”
“We’re tying up loose ends!” Julie replies.
“Well I’m just glad Jenny and Toby are back,” Rhonda says.
“I’m not,” Jenny says glaring at Toby.
“You rather die in the explosion?” Toby asks.
“YOUR MOM!” Jenny yells.
“Hey guys,” Rhonda says. “Stop fighting. Whatever you guys are arguing about doesn’t matter. Your friendship is what’s important. Like the My Little Ponies say, friendship is magic!”
“Rhonda’s right,” Jenny says. “For once. It doesn’t matter; Rhonda is just as ugly as she is stupid.”
“That’s right,” Rhonda says. “It…wait what?”
“We were arguing about whether you are more stupid or ugly,” Jenny explains. “I said you were more ugly than stupid, but now it’s clear to us, you are infinitely stupid as you are ugly.”
“I should have left you to die,” Rhonda states.
“But you didn’t,” Toby states. “All because you’re so stupid.”
“And you’re still so ugly!” Jenny points out.
“While that maybe true,” Chris says. “We still have an elimination to due. Since The Bulldogs brought back both Jenny and Toby, so they win, which means they get an advantage next challenge. It also means that The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice, and Team Indestructible have to vote someone off tonight!”
“We saved a bunch people and we still have to have an elimination ceremony?” Bridgette asks.
“Yup,” Chris replies. “Team with the really long name, you vote off someone first, then Team Indestructible can. Elimination starts in fifteen minutes.”
A little bit later, Geoff and Bridgette are alone.
“Bridgette are you ok,” Geoff says. “Are you sure we should be walking out here with your injury.”
“I’m fine,” Bridgette replies. “I just want to tell you something in private.”
Bridgette pulls out a pamphlet from her jacket pocket.
“Here,” Bridgette says. “Before we left I did some research, and I found that there is another summer school program starting at your school soon. You can still pass and not get held back! We can drop out together and I can help you study and…”
“No,” Geoff states. “First off, I won’t let you drop out of the plane in crutches. And more importantly, you’re enjoying yourself here, making new friends, having fun in the competition. I can’t take that away from you. You aren’t dropping out.”
“Then what…what we do?” Bridgette asks.
“…I don’t know,” Geoff replies. “But…I’ll think of something...”
Geoff is shown in the confessional. “Out there, it made me realize how much damage I’ve done to Bridgette. She handled herself well and I know that she is capable. I just love her and want to be with her. But I have to admit to myself Bridgette is her own person and has her own life and I can’t hold her back from her potential.”
Bridgette is shown in the confessional. “After seeing and hearing how Geoff was so caring, it made me realize…how special Geoff is. He was willing to do a lot when I thought the relationship was in trouble and he thought it was fine. That shows how he cares for me and wants to make me happy and make things work. And that’s why I fell for him, he is a caring, fun guy who loves; loves the world, loves new experiences, …and loves me. But I changed him, I put pressure on him because I didn’t have faith in him and he did change because he loved me. I got so blinded in us as an item and a relationship that I forgot why I loved him. But I won’t forget ever again. And I won’t lose him.”
The scene changes to the elimination room, where an elimination is taking place.
“Well it’s been a hectic day huh?” Chris asks.
The (enter long team name here) reply with bitter stares.
“Ok, so you almost died…or worse,” Chris replies. “But we’re far away from it and barely anything bad happened.”
“Yeah, just the destruction of Jersey Shore,” Nellie states.
“Well you guys still lost,” Chris states. “So let’s just get to the part people really care about; elimination! Since this shouldn’t be new to any of you lets get this thing started. Rhonda has the barf bags of airline issue peanuts and is ready to pass them out.”
“Why did we run out of those in World Tour anyway?” Sierra asks.
“I always thought Ezekiel ate them while he was hiding,” Julie says.
“That’s why they went missing!” Chris says coming to the realization.
“And explains why is skin tone become sickly green,” Rhonda says.
“Well let’s start already,” Chris says. “The first barf bag goes to…Cody.”
Cody catches his barf bag.
“Sierra, Julie and…Mikey are also safe.”
The three catch their barf bags, as Julie and Sierra nervously look at Nellie.
“The four of you here each have a reason for elimination,” Chris states. “SG, you betrayed the Fun Bunch. Noah, you’re not really liked and helped send Julie home. Same goes for you Gwen. And maybe some enemies of yours have sent you here Nellie. In whatever case, one of you didn’t get votes and isn’t in our bottom three, who each received a vote. And that is…
…SG.”
A little surprised, SG catches his barf bag.
“That leaves just you three,” Chris says turning to the bottom three with an evil grin. “Each of you received a vote, but two you are safe. The next person safe is…
…Gwen.”
Shocked, Gwen catches her barf bag.
“Nellie, Noah,” Chris says. “The final barf bag goes to…
…N
…ellie. Noah, go home.”
“Whatever,” Noah replies. He grabs his parachute and jumps off.
“Well that was anti-climatic,” Rhonda says.
“Very,” Chris says disappointed. “Oh well, let’s get ready for the next elimination.”
Noah is shown in the confessional, probably before his elimination. “I know I’m going home tonight. But I’m voting for Nellie, just because she irks me.”
Gwen is shown in the confessional. “I can’t believe I’m safe. Truth is, I voted for myself. I had hurt so many people here and I didn’t deserve to stay as much as they did. I really thought they would all vote for me. Why didn’t they?”
Cody is shown in the confessional. “I really want Gwen to stay. I talked with the Fun Bunch and Sierra said they were voting for Noah. After I made sure Gwen was safe I tried to talk them into keeping Noah but they wouldn’t budge. Noah said he was voting for that creepy depressed girl…so I did too. I thought some of the others might too, but it didn’t happen. I know she’s Sierra’s friend…but if she went then Gwen might have a better chance of staying.
Sierra is shown in the confessional. “Just as planned, Noah went home. We thought about Gwen, but we decided to wait so we could mess with her more. We also wanted Mikey and SG to sweat it out more. Mikey…why did he save me? I mean maybe he was just doing it because it was right…but then he left me as soon as possible, just because he thought I would be too offended with him. After he saved me! …I feel bad for the way he has been treated, for the way I treated him.” Sierra sighs.
The scene changes to show Team Indestructible at elimination.
“Since we have a new timer to the show,” Chris states pointing to Nate. “I should explain how elimination works.”
“It’s ok Chris,” Nate replies. “Rosamond informed me.”
“Oh good,” Chris says. “Then I’m prepared for an exciting elimination. A team that has been through so much and are almost all good friends. Sounds like this elimination will be extra juicy. So let’s get voting!”
“…No.”
“What?” Chris asks.
“No,” Geoff states again. “I’m quitting the show. I need to pass school, and that’s more important then this show. I have to go to summer school so I can’t stay here.”
“We understand,” Rhonda replies. “We’ll make arrangements for you to return home to finish your school studies.”
“We will?” Chris asks.
“Yes,” Rhonda replies annoyed.
“See ya dudes,” Geoff says to his teammates.
“Geoff!” Bridgette cries as she hugs her boyfriend. “Don’t go! Let me go too!”
“I’m sorry Bridge,” Geoff replies. “But I can’t let you miss the opportunity for five million dollars and to have new friends. Please stay.”
“But I’ll miss you!” Bridgette yells.
“Bridgette we both know I have to do this,” Geoff replies. “And I realize now we need time apart. I’ve been holding you back to be who you are. You’re a sweet but capable girl who is a lot more tough than I gave credit for.”
“Oh Geoff,” Bridgette states almost crying. “You know sometimes on the Island when you tried flirting with me I thought you were a brainless party guy. But I know you’re not now. You live life happily and bring happiness to everyone you meet, especially me. You’re not complex because your smart enough to know how to be happy. And you care about people and just try to make them happy. And you’ve made me happy by treating with such importance and care throughout our whole relationship.”
“That makes what I have to say harder,” Geoff replies with a sigh. “…I think we should break up. We’re very different and I hold you back, and…”
“No,” Bridgette replies with tears falling out of her eyes. “I know we’ve had a lot of trouble recently and have let our relationship overshadow everything. But every relationship has trouble and needs work. And our problem was that we love each other too much, which most couples don’t! And we now know how to fix our mistakes. We’re both at fault but we both care and that’s what matters! Let’s continue our relationship after the show, please!”
“Anything for you Bridge,” Geoff replies. “…But I guess have to go.”
“I’ll try my hardest to win,” Bridgette states.
“I know you will,” Geoff replies. “Because now you can focus and use the potential you have.”
“And you will pass school for the same reason,” Bridgette replies crying but smiling.
“Wait,” Rosamond says. “Before you go…how about some pictures?”
Geoff gives a small smile and nods. As a group everyone takes a picture, before Bridgette and Geoff take one together, their final moments competing together.
“I love you Bridgette,” Geoff states casting a final glance at Bridgette.
“I love you too,” Bridgette replies sobbing uncontrollably.
…Then Geoff jumped, parachute and all. Team indestructible was down a member, a beloved member, but the team still felt a small bit of happy, because they had gotten to know him and enjoy his company. And they would have the memories of the good times…
Chapter 11 The Bermuda Love Triangle
Chris and Rhonda are shown in the front of the plane. Chris is drinking an energy drink called Killer.
“Last time on Total Drama What The Heck?” Chris narrates. “Are contestants went into Jersey Shore after a factory exploded and made it the sight of a tragedy. They went looking for Jenny and Toby, and ended up finding mobsters, survivors, sheep and foiled an insane bad guy’s scheme while at the same time exploding a prototype nuclear bomb, destroying Jersey Shore.”
“Seriously, so match happened in the last three episodes, that we can’t even explain what all went down,” Rhonda states. “I mean Julie returned, Cody and Nate debuted, Barbie talked and revealed stuff, Rosamond got separated, Bridgette and Julie got shot…”
…And it ended with anti climatic eliminations,” Chris states bitterly. “Noah, who we all know would go. But even with the promise of a second dramatic elimination between close-knit Team Indestructible, it was ruined by Geoff quitting.”
“Yeah quitting is always boring,” Rhonda states. “During Survivor two people quit and it was so lame. One was such an interesting villain who even had an idol and was everyone’s choice to take to the final 3. It was really boring and anti climatic. After that they enforced harder rules about quitting.”
Well hopefully we won’t have to do that,” Chris states. “I mean Geoff quit to help his education, which was important.”
“Yeah,” Rhonda says. “But you did change some of the rules regarding the interns after their drinking problems, so they wouldn’t die anymore right?”
“Yup,” Chris lies. “So, what crazy stuff will happen next? Who will hook up; Julie and SG, Bradley and Heather, Rosamond and Nate? Or will new love interests reveal themselves to the shippers? Who will defeat the other; Barbie vs. Heather and Bradley, The Fun Bunch vs. Gwen, Rhonda vs. Reality?”
“What?” The stalker fan asks.
“And who will get the boot? Find out on Total Drama What The Heck?” Chris narrates. He chugs the rest of the Killer.
“Be careful, that energy drink looks really unhealthy,” Rhonda states.
“I’ll be fine, my trainer says it is fine,” Chris replies. He opens another.
(Theme song plays)
It was the day of the next challenge, during the wee hours of the morning, when the sun was just coming up. Heather was having a hard time sleeping, despite the fact she was in first class. She was wide-awake after having an odd dream, a very odd dream…
It started out as a nightmare…
Heather was witnessing a speech on the new plane, being given to a crowd by Barbie.
“She thinks she is all that,” Barbie stated to a crowd on the plane. “She thinks she is better than us. But she is a fraud. She use to be ugly, she use to be uncool, she use to be like the people she picked on! What kind of person goes through that and torments others? A beast with no soul! She clearly she only cares for herself. I say no more! Let’s punish her!
Hunt her like the witch she is!”
A loud cheer rang out amongst the crowd. They all suddenly had pitchforks and torches and were screaming battle cries.
But to make matters worse, Barbie was leading an army of her worse enemies; Blandley, C.I.T., That sheep Lindsay, Ugly Beth, Loudmouth LeShawna, Eval, The Uber Losers (Sierra and Rhonda) and even Weird Goth Girl. They charged at her, and she ran as fast as she could.
Heather felt upset thinking back to this. Was it all her enemies against her? Or was it that maybe Barbie was right about her in the speech?
“Ew no!” Heather thought. “Like Miss Piggy could ever be right!”
Running from the crowd, Heather ran into the elimination room and accidently fell out of the door. The crowd cheered as Heather seemingly fell to her death.
This is where things seemed to get weird…
Falling, she closed her eyes as she was about to splat all over the ground.
But instead she was caught in someone’s arms, someone’s strong arms…
“Don’t worry I got you beautiful,” The voice stated.
Heather opened her eyes to see she was in the arms of a familiar man, and was being held close to his bare chest. Bight sunlight was shining in her eyes, mostly blinding her. She could tell she was in a field of flowers, a field she wasn’t familiar with.
A laugh came from the suitor holding her. She looked up, and at first the sunlight gave the allusion it was Alejandro. But the smile, the smile wasn’t Alejandro’s smug snake grin. It was more genuine, happy to be around her.
The sunlight faded to reveal he was…Bradley! And he was looking at Heather…like she was beautiful. Not looking with lust like she was hot, but like she was beautiful.
It was then that Heather snapped awake.
Now sitting at the bar while most of her teammates slept, Heather tried to figure out what that meant.
“You don’t like him do you?” Heather thought to herself. “Of course not! But that look he gave you, why did you see that? Has he given you that look before? Of course not, we are just partners in crime!”
As Heather tried to assure herself, she noticed something. Bradley wasn’t even in the room…
Getting up and leaving first class, Heather went out to room to see Bradley walking at a quick pace. He looked suspicious and his hand was stuffed in his pocket.
Quietly following him, he stopped at the confessional, and quickly turned around to see if anybody was nearby. His eyes almost shot out of his head when he saw Heather crossing her arms behind him.
“Heather!” The jock says startled. “What…what are you doing here?”
“Just hoping to use the confessional,” Heather replies. “What are you doing?”
“Uh…had to go to the bathroom,” Bradley replies. “I might be awhile…”
“What is in your pocket?” Heather asks.
“Nothing,” Bradley replies cocking an eyebrow.
“Don’t lie to me,” Heather replies. “You can fool the others, but not me.”
“I’m not lying,” Bradley replies confidently. “Can I go to the bathroom now?”
“I’ll admit you can lie very well,” Heather states. “You’re as good as lying as a politician. But you still haven’t taken your hand out of your pocket. And you were so nervous coming down this hallway. Now you may have gotten time to gain your composure, but you didn’t have it to begin with. You don’t have to go to the bathroom. What secret are you hiding?”
“Nothing,” Bradley replies. “And I have got to go.” Quickly rushing to the bathroom, Bradley slams and locks the door before Heather can say another word.
Heather waits for a while and finally Bradley comes out of the confessional.
“Here you go,” Bradley replies as he motions to the door.
He walks away as Heather glares and slams the confessional.
Heather is shown in the confessional. “He is hiding something. What did he do that took so long in here? It doesn’t smell like he did…you know. I don’t know what he is keeping as a secret, but I will find out. Unfortunately, if I try to find out what it is, I may lose ties with the alliance, since Bradley is the only one keeping me in. So…I’ll need someone to find out for me. …And I think I know the exact person...
Later, Gwen is shown in the economy section. Suddenly she starts scratching her back like crazy.
From afar, Sierra looks on and laughs to herself.
Suddenly Cody walks up to Gwen.
“You okay Gwen?” The tech geek asks.
“My back is itching like wild,” Gwen replies, “and I can’t even reach all of it.”
“Here let me help you,” Cody replies scratching Gwen’s back.
The goth sighs and replies, “Thanks Cody.”
“Anything for you Gwen,” Cody replies.
Sierra snarls at this and crosses her arms.
Sierra is shown in the confessional. “Okay I admit, I’m super jelly of Cody being attracted to Gwen. I’m so jealous, you might as well call me Jelly Clarkson. Why can’t Cody like me? What is so great about Gwen? She has dated two other guys, shown no interest in him and even sent home one of my BFFs! But he is still attracted to her. …I just don’t know what to do.”
Sierra turns away from the scene and curls up into a ball. She sighs and states, “Why can’t Cody love me? …Am I not good enough?”
Mikey, hearing this from afar rushes forward. “Don’t say that. “You are great Sierra! You’re a nice person who cares about your friends and you have tons of creativity and ambition! That’s what made me such a big fan of you when I saw you last season! Don’t think because one guy is completely blind to how incredible you are, that you’re nothing! That only hurts yourself, and a girl like you shouldn’t ever be hurt.”
Sierra looks up at Mikey confused.
Mikey blushes and starts to walk away saying, “Sorry, I know you are mad. I’ll leave now…”
“Wait,” the uber fan says, “In Jersey, after you saved me, why did you walk away? I mean after you saved me, then you apologized and walked away, not wanting to upset me. But you just saved me life. I don’t get it?”
“I thought that would make you happy,” The short guy replies.
“Didn’t you think you had a right to be treated better after saving me?” Sierra asks.
“Well, I just wanted you to be happy like I said, so I thought I did what you would want,” Mikey replies.
“But that isn’t fair to you,” Sierra states. “Why are you wanting to make me happy? Why try so hard even after I’ve shunned you and punished you? Why still be nice to me?”
…Isn’t it an obvious?” Mikey asks blushing as red as a tomato.
In a flash, Mikey walks away quickly, leaving Sierra only more perplexed…
A little bit later, Rosamond was walking down the economy section with her cats.
“Wasn’t breakfast great today?” Rosamond asks her kitties.
They purr happily in response.
“Those homemade biscuits were so good,” Rosamond replies. “I’m so full, I don’t think I could eat anymore. I wonder where Jovi and Nate are? Have any of you seen them?”
Her cats shake their head no in response.
“They seem to be spending a lot of time together lately huh?” the cat girl asks. “That’s good right? I mean, my best friends should get along.”
The kitties nod.
Rosamond hears laughter coming from around the corner and stops.
“You’re a brony?” Jovi says teasingly.
“Yeah, I enjoy My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic,” Nate replies teasingly. “Sue me if it has good writing. Rosamond and I watch it together, she got me hooked. And now I love it.”
“My Little Pony isn’t the only thing you love huh?” The redhead asks teasingly.
The kid detective blushes a deep red, and says, “Shush, you promised to keep it a secret! Remember?”
“I know,” Jovi replies. “But you’re so funny when you get embarrassed. Plus I think the way you feel is so sweet.”
“Really?” Nate asks blushing.
“Really, and I’m glad you told me,” the leader says smiling. “You’re an awesome guy Nate.”
Nate smiles and grabs Jovi in a bear hug, replying, “Thanks, you’re awesome too.”
Rosamond quickly and quietly darts away from the corner.
She rushes off until she is far from her friends’ location.
Her kitties run off after her. They give her odd looks.
“I can’t believe it,” Rosamond states. “Jovi and Nate…are secretly dating? …Well that…that is great! Good for them right? I mean as their best friend I’m going to be supportive of their relationship. Even if they don’t know I know they’re in love. Let’s give them some space and wait for them at breakfast. I’m really hungry…”
A little while later, Barbie makes her way to the infirmary. Walking in she sees Julie and Bridgette, who are seated in hospital beds. She doesn’t pay them much attention, because she is too distracted in her own thoughts.
Flashback To Yesterday, Late At Night
Barbie is sitting in a shady section of the economy class. Near her feet is luggage.
So you showed up,” Barbie states.
Cosmic River turns the corner and replies, “Yeah. How did you know I was here?”
“I heard your footsteps when you started walking down the hall,” Barbie answers. “And you just walked on the loose board that squeaks, which means you were turning the corner.” “Groovy hearing,” Cosmic River replies gloomily. “But how did you know that it was me and not someone else?”
“I just assumed it was,” Barbie replies. “Not many people know of this section of the economy section. ...I am guessing that you have talked to our teammates about future elimination?”
Cosmic River sighs. “Yeah. I should have done it earlier man. DJ had been avoiding since Washington. I tried talking to him but he was beating around the bush. I asked who would go after you…he said nothing. I asked if he was in alliance with out me and he got all hacked. Saying that was none of my business and that he cared to win. I said I did too and he told me I didn’t show it. He said he is doing this for his mama and that I didn’t care about how important that was to him…”
Cosmic River sits down next to Barbie and looks down to the floor. “Before I could say anything DJ beat feet. I tried to find him. Then I ran into Bradley. I tried talking with him about who would go after you. He said it wouldn’t be me after you. Maybe Heather or Chef. But I know he talks to Heather a lot and Chef as well. I asked if he knew about DJ’s bunny and he told me how he saved it from almost being poisoned by you.
I asked if he framed you for it and did the same about Duncan’s carving. He claimed you had been messing with my head and that you were just trying to get revenge on him for being upset about the luggage. I asked if he and DJ were an alliance without me. He said of course not… But then I told him about how defensive DJ was. He said he would talk to DJ. Said he was under a lot of stress and I may have hurt his feelings being suspicious. Then he left, saying he would go and look for DJ. I continued looking. But a little later I came across Bradley again. He was talking to Heather again. They were smirking, evil like.”
“They tend to do that often,” Barbie states.
Cosmic River looks under Barbie’s feet and sees the luggage. “Doesn’t look like it is made of fur at all,” The hippie states. “Not even fake fur. Just plastic. …I was a dipstick for believing him. I was a dipstick for being so oblivious to how bad he was, and all his allies. Why didn’t I see this?”
“Because you’re a good person,” Barbie replies. “ Nothing to be ashamed of. It may not be the best advantage in a game designed to cause conflict and drama, but it counts for more outside of this stupid show. Besides, all the other Bulldogs have fallen for Bradley’s lies as well.”
“I just wish I would have realized all this earlier,” Cosmic River replies. “Maybe I wouldn’t have lost my friend.”
A long stretch of silence follows.
“…I’m sorry,” Barbie finally replies. “I wish I knew what to say, but I’m not too good at being comforting.”
“You have done a pretty groovy job actually,” The hippie replies.
“But why didn’t you speak out earlier and talk to DJ and I?”
Barbie sighs. “I guess it didn’t seem like my place to meddle… This was a game you all wanted to win and I didn’t want to be a part of. I know that isn’t too nice. But I’m not a out to hurt people, I don’t use people like Bradley or Heather.”
“It’s all right,” Cosmic River replies. “I mean you called them out on their evil actions. And I know you want them to stop. But why get involved now? And is this about revenge or doing the right thing?”
“I’m getting involved because Bradley and Heather brought me into this,” The Goth replies. “I was fine being voted off and in fact wanted to be voted off. I thought me not talking and even throwing the basketball challenge stated that. But they still tormented me and even started lying about me. So I guess maybe this is about me getting revenge. But I’m about doing it with good intentions. And this alliance is kind of my way of apologizing to you…for not doing anything earlier.”
“Man, I think I understand,” Cosmic River replies. “But why are you here on this show anyway? Why didn’t you just quit like Geoff apparently did?”
"My contract forbid me from quitting," Barbie replies. "My parents had it added."
"Why?" Cosmic River asks.
"I'd rather not say," Barbie replies.
“Oh,” Cosmic River replies. “I understand cat. It’s groovy. …So what is our plan now? You mentioned trying to get DJ and Lindsay on our side earlier. Do you still think that will work man?”
“I’m not sure,” Barbie replies honestly. “I think I will have to talk to DJ now, and you can talk to Lindsay, but we can wait till later for that. The best thing for you do is to not talk to the other Bulldogs. That way you can avoid offending them and making you next on the chopping block.”
“All right,” Cosmic River replies. “…Do you think we have a chance against them? Five against 2 isn’t gnarly odds.”
Barbie turns to the hippie and replies, “…It’s like what I said to Heather. I have tons of knowledge. And I have a few other game changing surprises that might sway your opinion…”
End Of Flashback
Barbie sits on another hospital bed still in thought. Cosmic River was curious by what she had in mind but she told him not to worry and stick to the plan. Honestly, she doubted that Lindsay or DJ could be swayed. But that wasn’t her real plan. THE TRUE PLAN, would insure Heather’s demise, but Barbie couldn’t tell Cosmic River the plan. It was better to keep it secret…
Now walking in the infirmary was a redheaded intern. “Hi girls, I’ll be with you in just a minute,” The intern says soft spoken. “I have some paper work to do.”
The three girls nodded, but they weren’t really paying attention.
Like Barbie, Bridgette was deep in her own thoughts. She was thinking of Geoff, and how much she missed him and asking herself how would she do this without him to comfort her. But she couldn’t think of a satisfying answer.
And like Barbie, Julie was having her own flashback. It was of an encounter with someone, like Barbie’s. But it was much more unpleasant…
Flashback To Last Night, At The Pool
It was around eleven at night, maybe even midnight. Julie was still in her cast, but she decided to visit the pool anyway. Even though their teams hadn’t won, Bridgette and Julie were given access to the pool while they were recovering.
They had actually received a lot of special treatment after their injury. They received breakfast in bed, had TV and internet access like they were in first class, and that recurring redheaded intern was there to take care of them and assist them if they needed anything.
The redheaded intern was very nice, though she was quite weird. She was sometimes talkative and rambled, which Julie liked. Then sometimes she was quiet and very afraid to be social, often muttering. It was probably just nothing…
This special treatment was probably to avoid legal problems, even though their wavers and contracts would probably prevent them from really doing any damage. But after Courtney’s lawsuit in Action, Chris probably wanted to be on the safe side. Got to keep his massage budget.
Julie lay to the side of the pool and splashed her hands in the water. She was alone at the moment.
Julie had asked Bridgette if she wanted to come, but the surfer was too tired. Bridgette and Julie had bonded the last few days in the infirmary and had enjoyed the other’s company along with the redheaded intern. The redheaded intern wasn’t allowed in the pool, so Julie just decided to go alone.
Looking into the water, Julie saw her reflection. She frowned and splashed the water in front of her. When the water become clear, it revealed SG was behind her.
“What do you want?” Julie asks.
“Julie…I’m sorry,” SG replies. “I’m honestly so, so, very sorry.”
“Just because you say sorry doesn’t mean it doesn’t still hurt,” Julie replies.
“I know,” SG replies. “I just want you to know that I mean that. I didn’t want to hurt you, I didn’t want anything to end up like this.”
“How did you want it?” Julie asks. “Hmm? What was the point of backstabbing me and hurting me? Why?”
“I don’t know,” SG admits. “I was just confused. You were so open and flirty. And Julie you’re crazy. And…”
Julie turned around to face SG and states, “You know SG, people have been telling me that my whole life. Julie you’re crazy. You act like a fool. Your ideas are doomed to fail. You ramble on. You look ridiculous. You’re messed up. Julie you have no social skills. Julie you have to change. Julie you will be alone. And I’ve had enough of being told what is wrong with me.
Yes I like adding comic relief. Yes I have the tendency to cause some destruction. I like to make a huge hole in the fourth wall, till the fourth wall is gone! I prefer my past to be multiple choice. I like to have wacky adventures. I like running around and feeling free. I like being surrounded by friends. I want love, and I look for love and I fall hopelessly in love. I want someone who cares for me and make me feel special and confident and whom I do the same for. So maybe I am crazy for thinking I can have that. But I’m still a person.”
“Julie…” SG tries to say.
“You didn’t have the right to treat me like that!” Julie shouts enraged. “If I was too crazy or too clingy, just say something. I get it. If you didn’t like me, tell me. I told you in Mexico that I am who I am and it hurts to be judged and I hate being seen as a freak. And you said I was fine. You lied to my face. I trusted you…”
Julie looks away from SG. “I guess you are just another guy who has hurt me…”
“…I’ll leave,” SG states. He leaves, as Julie looks down in the pool. She begins to cry.
End of Flashback
Enter The Spice Girls... or Interns
“Whelp,” The redheaded intern says. “Your wrist looks fine Barbie. You won’t need to comeback for check ups anymore. I think it's totally healed.”
Bridgette and Julie snap out of their depressing thoughts and sit up right.
“Thanks,” Barbie replies. Barbie whispers in the intern’s ear, who then whispers back.
“So this is one of your sources,” Bridgette playful states. “Has Pepper here been telling you some secrets?”
Barbie doesn’t reply.
“Wait… you don’t drink excessively do you Pepper?” Bridgette asks.
“No,” the redheaded intern (Pepper) replies shyly. “But…that is only because I...I was part of the Alcoholics Anonymous before joining the show. …Still am. Anyway, let’s check on your legs. Barbie, you are free to go.”
Barbie nods and leaves.
“Hey Pepper,” Julie says. “Where did you learn all this medical stuff?”
Um…I took medical classes in college,” Pepper replies. “But…um…I never got to finish. So I…um joined this show as an intern.”
A phone rings off the distance. “I…um…should get that,” Pepper softly states. “I’ll…I’ll be back.”
Pepper leaves the two girls. An silence follows till Julie turns over to Bridgette and asks, “Hey Bridgette what is it like to fall in love?”
"Why?” Bridgette asks.
“I’m just curious and thought you might have experience on it,” Julie replies.
“Ok,” The surfer replies. “Well, I think love maybe different for everyone. What being in love feels like and what you need from it maybe different for others. Maybe not, I’m not entirely sure. But it is something really special. Geoff is really special to me and I wouldn’t trade him for anyone.”
“But what about Alejandro?” Julie asks. “You went gaga for him.”
“I don’t really think I was in love with him,” Bridgette replies. “I guess it was doing this show again, for a third time. This show has taken its toll on a lot of us, and it seems hopeless because no one ever seems to really win. Without Geoff there, I wasn’t sure how I was going to go through with it. I wanted to win, but I needed some support. I guess Alejandro showed interest and being interested in him gave me some sort of comfort to get through it. But it was more false comfort. Am I making sense?”
“Kind of,” Julie replies.
“I’m not the best at explaining these things,” Bridgette replies. “Why are you so interested about finding out about love?”
“I’ve had a lot of trouble with romance and love,” Julie replies. “I was hoping maybe someone who was in love could give me some better insight. I know it is silly, but I guess I just really want to find someone.”
“It isn’t silly,” Bridgette replies. “Tons of people want love. But I don’t think you should make it such a big focus. I think love is important, but you can’t let it overwhelm you. Although, I have only learned that recently.”
Pepper danes back in and excitedly exclaims, “Woo! Ok Julie, let’s get that cast off your leg! Then you can start running and probably kicking people and other foot stuff!”
“What was the phone call about?” Bridgette asks.
Pepper claps her hands and says, “My best friend Cinnamon, who I met at my AA meetings, is getting to do her first interning job today! Then we can start working, and make minimum wage and retire when we are elderly if we live that long and do foot stuff!”
A little bit later, Julie is shown walking, without her cast, to Nellie and Sierra.
“Julie you got your cast off!” Sierra cheers.
“Yup,” Julie replies. “Now I can walk, kick and do other foot stuff!”
“What is foot stuff?” Nellie asks.
“A running gag,” Julie replies.
Suddenly, a squirrel rushes out of the air vents, followed by a crazy fox.
The fox bites the squirrel’s tale, as the squirrel prays for mercy.
“Quit that!” Julie yells kicking the fox. The fox drops the squirrel and flees.
“Why did you do that?” Nellie asks. “The fox was just doing what is natural. Not that it matters, since the fox will likely die in this unnatural environment.”
“Why are all these animals living on this plane?” Sierra asks. “I mean what kind of creatures could be living on this thing?”
Julie picks up the squirrel in her arms and says, “Sorry if I couldn’t watch a poor animal murdered Nellie. This poor guy needs some help in staying safe.”
Julie puts the squirrel down and bends over some purple luggage, presumably hers, and pulls out a shotgun.
"Here you go Bucky,” Julie states, giving the shotgun to the squirrel.
“Did you just give a squirrel a loaded gun?” Nellie asks.
“Julie are you crazy?” Sierra asks. “What if things end up like When You Give a Mouse a Cookie!”
Julie only playfully rolls her eyes at her friends. She then gives instructions to the squirrel, “Pull the trigger to fire. Aim it at predators hurting you only ok? And please down kill any people with it ok Bucky?”
“Bucky?” Sierra asks.
“He looks like a Bucky,” Julie replies. “Now Bucky, you’ll have to find a way to get more bullets once you run out. Be careful. And when you get the chance, get out of this plane. It is cra, cra.”
Bucky nods and runs off happily with his new shotgun.
“Aw that was really sweet,” Sierra says.
“And completely illogical,” Nellie states unemotionally.
>“Oh what is the worse that could happen?” Julie asks.
“Well, you could have just upset the balance of nature,” Nellie replies.
“I’ve already done that a few times,” Julie replies. “Besides Bucky needs protection from all the scary things out there. Like those nuns or Betty Crocker!”
“Of course,” Nellie replies dryly. “We should all have shotguns to protect ourselves from nuns and Betty Crocker. Who knows what they’ll do to us, those monsters.”
“Exactly!” Julie replies.
“Whatever,” Nellie replies. “I need to go do something.”
“Oh, ok,” Julie replies. “I need to go back to the infirmary for some things. I just wanted to make sure you guys are ok. You are ok right?”
“I’m fine,” Sierra replies.
“Me too,” Nellie replies.
“Good,” Julie replies smiling. “Bye Sierra, bye Nellie!”
Julie cartwheels off as her friends wave goodbye.
Nellie sighs and states, “Where can she get off like that? A squirrel needs a shotgun to protect itself against Betty Crocker and nuns? That is so crazy.”
“Well Julie is occasionally right,” Sierra replies. “She actually has an army of girl scouts. And she predicted all that stuff might be in Jersey, and it was all in that crate the bombs were in. She even predicted that there would be weapons of mass destruction and there were! I think Julie is right about a lot of things. Specifically illogical stuff.”
“That is what is depressing and upsetting me,” Nellie replies.
“Do you wanna talk about?” Sierra asks.
“I don’t know,” Nellie replies.
“I can talk like Doctor Phil if it will help,” Sierra replies.
“How what that help?” Nellie asks.
“It helps my mom,” Sierra replies. “But my mom is pretty kooky. Just tell me what is upsetting you.”
Nellie sighs and states, “It’s Julie. She talks about the craziest things that make nonsense. But she was technically right about there being weapons of mass destruction in Jersey.”
“I think that was a coincidence,” Sierra states.
“Sierra, she literally that everything in that crate might be in New Jersey,” Nellie replies. “And maybe I should let that slide. But then she turns out to have a secret organization that trains little girls to be assassins but fronts as simply being girl scouts. And she has secret underground lairs over the world to do that with. …I honestly feel dumber for having just said those things they're so outrageous.”
“I’ll admit I didn’t see that one coming,” Sierra replies. “And I would be worried about that if it wasn’t for the fact Julie is a good guy and I trust her.”
“I agree,” Nellie replies. “But what if everything she says is actually true.”
“…Then things might be really cool,” Sierra replies. “Why does it upset you?”
“I guess she is just challenging my logic of the world,” Nellie replies. “I know the world is nothing but depressing things after depressing things, but she says things that shouldn’t be real and aren’t possible.”
“I think I get you,” Sierra states. “It is like she when someone says to try and break your faith in your religion. She is breaking your faith in everything you know.”
“It’s kind of like that,” the depressed dame replies. “But not exactly. It is more like making mountains out of molehills and then magically making them mountains all along.”
“I can see that,” the uber fan replies. “How does this make you feel?”
Nellie sighs and replies, “It makes me feel like…I’m always wrong and Julie is always right. Like she is always suppose to win and I am always supposed to lose.”
“Aw Nellie,” Sierra states. “I don’t think Julie means to make you feel this way.”
“I know,” Nellie replies. “Which makes me feel a little guilty for feeling that way at all.”
“It’s understandable,” the string bean girl replies. “It’s nothing to be ashamed. My dad says sometimes we feel things that we don’t want to feel but know it’s small compared to other things. But it’s natural, and realizing that it doesn’t matter or change how we like people means we aren’t selfish people.”
“Your dad sounds really smart,” Nellie replies.
“Thanks,” Sierra replies. “What about your parents?”
“My parents remind me of Julie a little bit,” Nellie states. “They can be upbeat, especially my mother.”
Sierra chuckles, saying, “Sorry, but I didn’t think your parents would be so positive. How come you never mention them?”
“There’s nothing to say about them,” the depressed dame replies.
“Does it bother you that Julie reminds you of your parents?” the purple haired teen asks.
"Not really,” Nellie replies. “I hate to say it but one problem I kind of have with Julie is…she’s kind of secretive. I mean Julie’s still my friend but I feel like she doesn’t tell us everything which isn’t something a friend should do.”
“Maybe she has her reasons,” Sierra replies. “You trust her don’t her?”
“Of course,” Nellie replies. “I’ve gotten to know her and even if she does throw me in a sack occasionally I’d trust her with my life.”
“I feel the same way about her and you,” Sierra replies.
“Thanks,” Nellie states. “…Are you ok Sierra? You seem kind of down recently.”
“It’s nothing,” Sierra replies. “You probably don’t want to hear it.”
“You were there for me and I’m here for you,” Nellie replies.
“Well…it’s Cody,” the tall teen replies. “He still doesn’t like me, in the way I want him too. I’m beginning to think he never will. Do you think…I obsess over Cody?”
“You had a thermos of him in your bra,” Nellie replies. “I don’t get love but you talk about him a lot, even though he never really hangs out with us but with Gwen instead. Why?”
“I guess I’m just realizing how crazy I was for him,” Sierra replies. “Especially last season. I’ve started realizing how much I missed just hopelessly following Cody. And I wonder…was I really that crazy? Am I as crazy as the Total Drama fandom makes me out to be?”
“What’s fandom?” the depressed girl asks. “And how do they portray you?”
“The community of fans of the show,” Sierra replies. “And some of the fandom makes me seem like all I do is stalk Cody and that makes me really annoying. I don’t know I really liked Cody but I had fun with other stuff. The negative reaction to just doing my own thing on the show has made me kind of steer away from the fandom.”
“Well people will say all kinds of things to upset you,” Nellie replies. “It doesn’t matter what they think as long as you had fun. Though, I’m sorry they hurt you.”
It’s ok,” Sierra replies. “However I didn’t have to much fun last season as I have so far. It’s been a different experience.”
“Well this season is different from last time,” the depressed dame states. “New contestants, new format, new network; it’s different.”
“Yeah I guess the new cast mostly have made this season better,” Sierra replies. “The old contestants they didn’t really like me. I mean I wasn’t on the best team for socializing but I respected and adored a lot of them and they just didn’t care for me. The new contestants seem to be a little more social, in my opinion.”
“Well it kind of makes sense,” the depressed dame replies. “I mean the former were on there third season. Three seasons of this is bound to make anyone less social and energized. Most of the new people came here with enthusiasm the tortured here can’t muster.”
“True,” Sierra replies. “This game is pretty sadistic. After so long I can kind of see why a lot of them seem different from the first season. Like why Heather seems so quick to lash out. Four seasons of this, especially after being so close but getting gipped is kind of understandable. I mean no one really got to keep their money…except Duncan.”
“He still ended up losing it,” the depressed dame replies. “I think Duncan keeping it for how long he did just seemed to create false hope that the show could’ve been won. Like they weren’t just fighting to entertain a fickle short attention spanned audience in a first world country.”
“I don’t think fandom reaction may have always helped either,” the uber fan replies. “Still I guess we each have at least some fans. Mikey said he was a fan of mine.”
“Really?” Nellie asks. “When?”
“Earlier today,” Sierra replies. “It was weird…I was upset about Cody and I guess he saw me and he said these really sweet things to me. I asked why he was being so nice when I’ve done nothing but shun him and he asked wasn’t obvious. Then…he left.”
Nellie sighs and looks down to the ground. “I think we should stop.”
“Stop what?” Sierra asks.
“Stop shunning and sabotaging them,” Nellie replies. “They’ve been hurting for far too long and it really isn’t fair. They clearly feel guilty.”
“They should for lying and betraying us,” Sierra states.
“They made a mistake and want to move pass it,” Nellie expresses. “It’s a pretty human thing. We’re acting like them by going this far.”
“Maybe to get forgiveness they must endure punishment,” Sierra affirms.
“Forgiveness is not a reward to be earned, but a gift to be given,” Nellie replies.
Sierra scowls and turns away, resting her
“I don’t mean to upset you,” Nellie says. “But if Cody didn’t like Gwen, would you still want to hurt her? Even after Duncan broke up with her? And after seeing how that horrible vandalism made her cry? Would you want SG to be shunned after seeing him all alone during our first supper? Could you relate to feeling isolated? Do you want to keep hurting and making Mikey feel guilty after he has saved your life and still speaks good of you?”
The fangirl raises her head slowly and looks at Nellie. A tear rolls down her cheek.
“Sierra, I’m sorry,” Nellie states. “I’m not trying to make you feel bad. I’m sorry I shouldn’t be so harsh or forceful…”
“You were getting your point across,” Sierra replies. “And maybe you’re right. …I think we should talk about later with Julie. But thank you, for listening to me Nellie. It means a lot to me.”
“Of course,” Nellie replies. “Thanks for helping me too.”
During this time, Chris gives Pepper’s new friend work.
“Okay new intern,” Chris says. “Wait, what was your name?”
The intern shrugs.
“It doesn’t matter,” Chris replies. “I won’t remember it. Now I must inform being an intern is a difficult job. It is a painful, agonizing job that will break you. You will be worked like a dog!”
“Woof,” The intern replies emotionlessly.
“Yeah,” Chris states. “We have a lot of heavy lifting that needs to be done, got some new supplies coming in, so I hope you are prepared to work up a sweat.”
“If you take a man’s underarm sweat and rob it on a woman’s lips, it will put her in a better mood…” The intern replies.
“Ok,” Chris replies. “But since I am a benevolent host, along with intelligent, charismatic, good looking and modest, I’ll go easy on your first assignment. I need you to write a sign that says Challenge in 1 hour. Can you do that?”
“…You can do anything if you believe,” The intern replies meekly.
“Great,” Chris says handing the intern a piece of large paper and a marker. “We need that sign in two hours so they can get ready. I’ll be back in a bit. Then prepare to work your fingers to the bone!”
“Phalanges,” The intern replies creepily moving her fingers.
“I’m going to leave and take awhile to come back,” Chris states.
15 Minutes Later
“So how did you do?” Chris asks. The intern flips her sign, which reads 1-hour challenge.
“That isn’t right,” Chris states. “It is suppose to say Challenge in 1 hour. Why did you not write that?”
“I write with my left hand,” The intern replies.
“Just write Challenge in 1 hour. Okay?”
“…Maybe,” the intern replies meekly.
“If you want a job you will,” Chris replies. “Do you want this job?”
“…I don’t know,” the intern replies.
“I’ll be back to check on you,” Chris says. “Don’t screw up.”
13 Minutes Later
“Is it done?” Chris asks.
The intern flips her sign, which reads Change the challenge every hour.
“Do you think that’s right?” Chris asks.
“…I don’t know,” the intern replies.
“What is wrong with you?” Chris asks.
“Many things,” The intern says.
“Agreed,” Chris replies. “Now how can I work you like a dog if you don’t even do anything!”
"There are about 493 dog breeds in the world,” The intern replies.
“You more annoying than Rhonda,” Chris murmurs. “Write Challenge in 1 hour. Do that okay?”
“Okay…” The intern says.
“I’ll be back,” Chris says.
“Terminator,” The intern replies.
Chris sulks away in anger.
12 Minutes Later
“I’m here,” Chris states. “Show me the sign.”
The intern flips the sign, which reads, Rhonda here in 1 hour.
Chris facepalms and asks, “Are you completely brain dead?”
“…Murph,” the intern replies.
“I’m going to kill you,” Chris says. “The sign has nothing to do with Rhonda, she has no purpose relating to the sign. The sign should say, Challenge in 1 hour. I’ll be back in twenty-five minutes. With this much time you can do it.
>“Is time merely an abstract concept invented by humans to monitor their own going decay?” the intern asks.
“I’m not paying you to care,” Chris replies. “I’m paying you to finish a sign! Got that?”
“Yes,” The intern replies.
“I doubt it,” Chris states leaving.
25 Minutes Later
“Enough chit-chat,” Chris says. “Show me the sign.”
The intern flips her sign, which reads No Rhonda in one hour. We killed her.
“What do you think of this sign?” Chris asks.
“Ding-dong the witch is dead?” the intern replies meekly.
“It’s wrong,” Chris says. “It should say Challenge in 1 hour.”
“Oh,” the intern replies.
“Yeah,” Chris says. “I need the sign soon. Get it done.”
“…Okay,” the intern replies.
10 Minutes Later
“The sign!” Chris yells.
The intern flips the sign, which says "We didn’t kill Rhonda. Wink. ;)"
“I’m this close to throwing you off the plane,” Chris states. “You have fifteen minutes to write Challenge in one hour. Not that it matters, since the sign is useless now. But I’m willing to give you the chance. Okay?”
“…Okay,” the intern replies.
“I’ll have your head if it isn’t done,” Chris states.
“King Henry the eighth only beheaded two of wives,” The intern states. “But he is remembered for killing his wives often.”
15 Minutes Later
Chris walks in and angrily motions for the sign.
The intern flips the sign, which says This one is also wrong.
“It’s amazing I haven’t fired you isn’t it?” Chris asks.
“Yes,” the intern replies.
“Listen,” Chris states. “The challenge is on in oh…four minutes! You’ve spent all this time being an idiot and made us late! Now meet me in the mess hall, with the correct sign or you’re FIRED!”
“The song 4 Minutes by Madonna features Justin Timberlake and Timberland,” The intern states.
The host talks a calming breath. “It’s ok because I’m about to humiliate you on live TV. You’ll be sorry…”
Four minutes later the contestants are all meeting in the mess hall. Chris stands there impatiently tapping his foot with Jenny, Toby and Rhonda. The odd intern stands alone, holding the sign to her chest.
After the last contestant enters, Chris begins to talk. “Welcome contestants. Before we start today’s challenge I’d like to introduce you to our new intern.” “Oh so that’s Pepper’s new friend?” Julie asks.
“Who?” Chris asks.
“The intern who works in the medical field, with the curly red hair,” Bridgette (whose now on crutches) explains.
“Whatever,” Chris replies. “Anyway, I set this intern up with a task, simply write Challenge in 1 hour on a sign. Yet she thought to be a wiseguy instead.”
“But she’s a girl not a guy,” Lindsay says confused.
“The point is she didn’t write the message,” the host states agitated. “And now her job hangs in the balance, so let’s see if she got the sign right. Would you flip over the sign?”
“…Okay,” the intern replies slowly.
“Do you hear that?” Barbie asks. “It sounds like…music.”
Suddenly a lighted platform springs up from underneath intern. Then humming can be heard along with the music.
“Uh oh,” Julie states. “I have a bad feeling a musical is going to happen. Stupid author, she promised no more musicals…”
A quartet of gospel singers pop up from behind the intern as the music reaches full volume.
'Challenge In 1 Hour'
(Note this is written in script format for ease. Quotations mean there's talking)
Singers: Ooh Ooh Ooh! Ooh Ooh Ooh!
Lead Singer: Now come around and listen well. Cause this intern has somethin to tell!
Singers: Ooh Ooh Ooh! Ooh Ooh Ooh!
Lead Singer: Now Chrissie the devil sent a message from heck. So get it or he’ll snap this girl’s neck!
Singers: Ooh! Ooh Ooh! Ooh Ooh Ooh!
Singers: A challenge in one hour. Come and bring the power! No time to cower. Cause there’s a challenge in an hour! Yeah!
Lead Singer: Where will you go? I wish I could know!
Singers: Ooh Ooh Ooh! Ooh Ooh Ooh!
Lead Singer: England, Russia, maybe Japan. Nebraska, Timbuktu or Pakistan?
Singers: Ooh Ooh Ooh!
Nate: (singing to himself) Ooh ooh ooh.
Rosamond: (Giggles)
Nate: (Blushes) “Sorry, it’s catchy.”
Singers: A challenge in one hour! Don’t be a flower! A challenge in one hour! One and you’re closer to a cash shower!
Rhonda: “Um…where did the budget for this come from?”
Lead Singer: Now all eyes be on this sign. You’ll find everything is fine!
Singers: Ooh Ooh Ooh! Ooh Ooh Ooh!
Lead Singer: The intern survives another day! But she still don’t get no pay!
Rhonda: “Seriously, how did a stage even get here?
[Music speeds up]
Lead Singer: Who put the glad in gladiators?
Rhonda: “Ok now you’re just stealing from Disney’s Her…
Lead Singer: What you gotta chew that makes ya poo?
Heather: “Chef’s cooking?”
Chef: (Growls)
Lead Singer: Who has nothing in their head and should be dead?
Many People: Rhonda!
Rhonda: “…Hurtful.”
Jenny: “The truth hurts.”
Lead Singer: What fic is your number one pick?
Toby: “Any but this one.”
Lead Singer: Who was the 27th president of the USA?
Jovi: "Um…William Taft."
Courtney: "What does this have to do-"
Lead Singer: Whose gonna die cold and old?
Singers: All of you!
Lead Singer: So remember…
Singers: Challenge in one hour! Challenge in one hour! Challenge in one hour! Challenge in one hour! Challenge in hour! Toupee. Challenge in one hour! Challenge in one hour! CHALLENGE IN ONE HOUR!
(A burst of fireworks happens, spelling out challenge in one hour)
Nellie: “I’m not going to get an explanation on how fireworks were lit in the inside of moving plane and no one got hurt am I?”
Singers: Challenge in one hour! No time to shower! Challenge in one hour! Chris is really sour!
Lead Singer: (Licks Chris)
Chris: "Ack! What are you doing?"
Lead Singer: "Whatever I want!"
Singers: So to reiterate…
(The singers hold out the note as they direct towards the top of the platform, which is decorated with all sorts of animals like ostriches and white tigers and a circus act)
Intern: (Flips sign) “Challenge in one hour…”
Singers: Yeah, yeah, yeah!
[The song is over. Available on ITunes now ;) ]
“…Did I do it right?” The creepy intern asks unemotionally.
“Oh…you did it,” Rhonda states as Chris’ eye twitches.
The next sounds that can be heard are the gospel singers screaming as Chris throws them out of the plane, along with the raised platform, the circus performers and the various animals.
Chris carries the intern over his head and flings her off the edge. As she falls she only has one thing to say. “…Challenge in one hour.”
“Well…that song moved the plot along nowhere and made this chapter even more long,” Rhonda states.
“Eh,” Jenny replies. “The last two chapters were too dramatic, with all the life threatening situations, cliffhangers and such. Plus the plot probably had some loopholes last chapter.”
“I would say you meant holes, but I know you’re dumb enough to make that mistake,” Toby replies.
“YOUR MOM!” Jenny shouts.
“I feel better now,” Chris says. “So let’s get on to that challenge!”
The Cap'n and The Scientist
Later the contestants find themselves on a large cruise somewhere in the ocean.
“Welcome to the S.S. Princewood or the S.S. Total Drama for you,” Chris states. “A five star luxury ocean liner, with a buffet, hot-tub, and other crap you want.”
“I want crap!” Sierra shouts.
“Thanks for sharing,” Chris replies. “Anyway, we are meeting on this ship for three reasons. The first is to show you this ship, because the winners of the challenge will get to spend a night here as a reward!”
Several contestants gasp.
“When did this show become so generous?” Heather asks suspiciously.
“Thank our new network,” Chris replies. “They’ve been very generous to our show. It is a good think the head of the network is such a fan.”
“Wait,” Lindsay says. “What are the other two reasons we are meeting here?”
“Good question Lindsay,” Chris replies. “You see today’s challenge takes place on…The Bermuda Triangle!”
Lightning suddenly flashes, even though the sky is clear.
“The Bermuda Triangle!” Julie exclaims as lightning flashes again.
“Yes,” Chris says grinning from ear to ear. “An island claimed to be haunted, full of mysterious unexplained phenomenon. Many ships and aircrafts have disappeared and no one knows why. Perhaps, this place is just a mysterious island where anything can happen…”
“That isn’t true,” Toby states. “The Bermuda Triangle isn’t ‘a mysterious island where anything can happen…’ It is just an area where sloppily researched reports stated disappearances, which eventually become associated with the paranormal. Proportionally speaking, the number of missing ships and aircrafts in the area wasn’t any greater than any other part of the ocean, and the area is frequented by tropic storms.” “It sounds like someone wrote Chris’ earlier line just so they could have a bunch of weird stuff happen and write off saying ‘it happened cause they’re at the Bermuda Triangle’ ” Jenny states.
“I thought it was believable,” Rhonda states.
“That is because you’re obviously an idiot,” Jenny replies.
“I second that,” Toby states.
“And the final reason we’re here?” Courtney asks.
“Simple,” Chis replies. “While you possibly die I’m gonna enjoy this free stuff on the ship!”
“How do we get to the island?” Sierra asks.
“We’ll no ship is too crazy to go to the Bermuda Triangle,” Chirs states as lightning strikes. “So we found a sea captain crazy…I mean willing to take you. Wait no…I mean crazy. Oh Captain Sally!”
Suddenly a woman in a large yellow raincoat walks out. She has a hunched back but a pair of large shoulders. Her face had odd wrinkles and her hair was white like snow, as was the beard on her chinny chin chin. She wore a white and blue cap with an anchor on it and an eye patch covered her left eye and her right arm a hook.
“Ahoy ye land-lovers!” The captain states. “I be Cap’n Sally, fiercest sailor to sail these seven seas since Cap’n Crunch!”
“Wait…the cereal captain?” Jovi asks.
“Argh, the one and the same lassie,” Cap’n Sally states. “I be droppin ye scallywags off to an unhabituated island in…the Bermuda Triangle!”
Lightning flashes again.
“Hmm…odd weather we’re having huh?” Rosamond asks.
“Cap’n Sally will escort you to the island where you’ll receive further instructions on the challenge,” Rhonda states, laying in lawn chairs with the other hosts and drinking coconuts.
“Excuse me but what about our reward for winning last challenge?” Bradley asks.
“It will be delivered when you get there,” Chris states while holding a tanning mirror. “Now have fun and remember be careful!”
“We will,” Sierra replies.
“I was talkin to Cap’n Sally,” Chris states.
Later the contestants have all piled on to Cap’n Sally’s fishing boat and are headed off to the Bermuda Triangle. Lighting strikes again even though only the narration said Bermuda Triangle. Man this is a lame running gag…
“So Cap’n Sally,” Jovi asks. “Have you ever sailed in these areas before…or sailed ever?”
“Of course!” Cap’n Sally replies. “Why ye ask such a addled question?”
“Well your sailing is pretty shaky,” Jovi states.
Jovi is shown in the confessional. “Well it is more than a little shaky. She wrecked some rocks, took out a few dolphins and even hit an old lady crossing the street. And please don’t ask me how she did that in the middle of the ocean…she just did.”
“This challenge is so lame,” Heather states to Bradley. “This area isn’t supernatural, it is just a myth.”
Suddenly the boat slams to a stop.
“Belay that talk!” Cap’n Sally screeches. “These waters be more dangerous than looking at an ugly for too long in the sun. I was once like ye swabs, believed these waters were safe. I was a cocky lass then, still had me eye and a hand. But I met the creatures in these parts…”
“Like what?” Heather asks in disbelief.
“Like the dreaded Manatee 12!” Cap’n Sally exclaims.
“Manatee 12! ” Sierra asks shocked. “I saw a report about that on a TV, before the Jersey Shore challenge. They say it is fastest Manatee in the world!”
“Not just the fastest but the most bloodthirsty,” Captain Sally replies. “It gets its name from the fact it ate twelve people! It ate twelve sea dogs, of my own crew. But I captured the creature, it is in captivity right now.”
“So a manatee ate your hand and made you lose your eye?” Sierra asks.
Cap’n Sally chuckles and replies, “No, Manatee 12 was only the cheese biscuits to the lobster dinner. I ate my hand thanks to that bilge-sucking blaggard…OHF!”
“Who?” Jovi asks.
“OHF,” Cap’n Sally replies bitterly. “A ginormous whale, yet one who keeps disappearing. She’s called the Troll of The Sea but I call her…Blaineley.”
“Wait like Blaineley the former contestant from this show?” Jovi asks.
“Ay,” Cap’n Sally replies. “Because they’re both divas. Even after losing me crew to Manatee 1 I still hadn’t learned to stay away. OHF had a bounty and I was trying to cash in, but when hunting the troll it did something horrible…”
“Ate your hand?” Sierra asks.
“Yes,” Cap’n Sally replies. “But she did something far worse…she tricked me into…investing in a time share!”
Sierra and Julie gasp, holding each other in fear.
“That’s awful!” Sierra states.
“So wait, did the whale eat your hand?” Courtney asks.
“Yup,” Cap’n Sally replies nonchalantly. “It was a clear day in Fiji seas and I saw this one hundred dollar bill poking in the water. So I went down to reach for that booty but it be a trap! Blaineley plum bit me hand off, so I got a hook that same day.”
“Fiji?” Courtney asks. “Weren’t you hunting this whale in these waters?”
“Ay,” Cap’n Sally replies. “But the whale migrates. Tracked her to Fiji I did, but since she ate me hand I can’t find the scallywag!”
“So how did you lose your eye?” Jovi asks.
“Well,” the pirate lass replies. “It was a clear day in Fiji seas and I saw this one hundred dollar bill poking in the water. I went down to reach for that booty but…”
“I asked about your eye not your hand,” Jovi replies.
“I know,” Cap’n Sally states. “But I lost me eye after the whale took it. See I got this here hook that same day. And well then this bird pooped in me eye and I went to clean it out…but I forget I had a hook for a hand so I took out me eye.”
The contestants all give Cap’n Sally a weird look.
“Well if you excuse me,” Cap’n Sally states. “I’m gonna go check something down in the boat’s interior for a wee bit. Be right back.”
Cap’n Sally slowly enters down a hatchet of the boat leaving the contestants to their own business. After five minutes of this, Cap’n Sally still hasn’t returned.
“Anyone else worried that our crazy captain isn’t back yet?” Courtney asks.
“I’m sure everything’s fine,” Nate replies. “I mean, what’s the worst that could happen?”
Suddenly the boat speeds up at a vast pace. The contestants grab on to the boat for their dear lives.
“Hold on to your butts!” Rosamond states.
And then suddenly, a siren goes off.
“Can someone explain what is going on here?” Heather asks.
“Self destruct sequence initiated,” A computer voice states.
“WHAT?” The contestants scream.
“At least you were answered,” Bradley states.
“Could this get any worse?” The queen bee asks angrily.
“Yup,” Chef replies. “DEAD AHEAD, POINTY ROCKS!”
Everyone turns to see Chef’s right, ahead are a collection of pointy rocks.
“What should we do?” Rosamond asks.
“PANIC!” Chef screams.
“Okay,” Rosamond replies. “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”
The contestants scream as they make contact with the rocks and…
KABOOM!
The Boat...
...The teens groan as they wake up on the beach. A helicopter appears overhead and drops of a radio and a crate.
“Is everyone okay?” Bridgette asks as Courtney helps her up.
“Just peachy,” Heather replies as she tries to tear a crab off her rear.
“The boat’s completely destroyed!” Cody exclaims.
“Yeah, but that windmill in the background made it!” Julie exclaims. “At least…I think that stock footage image has a windmill in it…”
“So…did everyone enjoy the boat ride?” Chris asks over the radio.
“When I get my hands on you…” Heather states.
“Well now that you’re there we can began the challenge,” Chris states. “Your goal is simple, make it off the island and back to the cruise ship.”
A honk is heard as the cruise ship pulls up somewhat closer to the island.
“As you can see the cruise ship isn’t too far,” Chris replies. “But you won’t be able to swim there. You’ll have to build a boat or find someone off the island. First to make it back wins, last to make it back will vote off another teammate.”
“And our advantage?” Heather asks.
“Inside this crate are construction tools and a guide to make a raft on a stranded island,” Chris states. “It’ll make constructing a boat an easy task. I’ve also sent interns out there on the island to set up ways to escape so if you find them then please use them! Good luck! …This radio will now explode.”
Boom!
The radio...
“Why must everything explode now?” Rosamond asks.
A minute or so later the teams proceeded to get to work. Julie thought her team could handle anything in the mysterious forest so she led them into its depths. The Bulldogs had the advantage for building a boat so they decided to take it and got to work. Team Indestructible had a bit harder time figuring out what to do. Courtney was worried on how her gimpy surfer friend would fare so she proposed they team up with Bulldogs.
“Do you really think they will work with us?” Jovi asks.
“They maybe bullies but they aren’t heartless nor should they be stupid enough to pass up the offer,” Courtney replies.
“Fine, go see if you can convince them,” the redheaded leader states.
Courtney marches off to Bradley, who is giving his team orders.
“We need to collect wood,” Bradley states. “DJ and Chef take the big axes and cut some trees down southward to form some boats. Lindsay and Heather, you look for grass material down towards that side of the shore. Barbie you check further in the forest. Cosmic River you can come with me, we’ll cut down trees farther north.”
“I think it’d be fab if I go…”
“Stay on his good side,” Barbie whispers, interrupting the hippie before she headed off.
“…on ahead, it looks like a cool cat has come to visit,” Cosmic River states as he points to Courtney behind the jock, and makes his way on.
“May I help you?” Bradley asks the C.I.T.
“You actually might,” the brunette replies. “My team and I were wondering if we could assist you in crafting your boats in return for helping us get off as well. My friend Bridgette is injured and I don’t want her to stay on this island knowing there’s crazy things that can injure her further.”
“This reward is for the Bulldogs, if you want it win it next time,” Bradley replies.
“I understand that,” Courtney replies slightly annoyed. “But if we help you we can all get off faster. And our friend is hurt!”
“Listen naggy,” Bradley states. “I’m sorry she got shot. But she’s on your team, either put up with her or vote her off.”
“So you’d just leave someone injured here?” Courtney asks.
"Don’t get your panties in a twist,” the jock replies. “This is a competition; it’s cut throat and if you can’t deal with it, too bad. Get real or go home.”
With that, Bradley leaves to begin construction.
Courtney walks back to her team bitterly.
“Come on,” Jovi states. “We better travel to the forest and find a way off…”
“This isn’t over,” Courtney states to herself glaring at the Bulldogs’ leader.
Bradley is shown in the confessional. “Help Team Indestructible? Heck no. Maybe we could build the boats faster but it means they’ll be safe from elimination. Team Indestructible is the real threat here. They’re all strong for their own reasons and those goody two shoes won’t ever work as a longtime ally, so there is no reason to keep them. But I have bigger stuff to worry about…such as stopping Barbie from swaying Cosmic River from my side.”
Meanwhile The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice search the island for a way out.
“This island gives me the heebie jeebies,” Sierra states. “And not in a good way…”
Nellie thought about asking what that meant but decided she probably didn’t want to know.
“We’ll be fine,” Julie states. “It isn’t like the author is going to kill the main characters. That only happens in Gideon's stories.”
“But Cap’n Sally’s stories are creepy,” Sierra states. “What do you think happened to her?”
“Who knows,” Julie states. “She’ll probably turn up alive again later in a chapter and have a bigger significance. Her character seems like she would.”
“What is this a work of fiction?” Nellie asks.
“Now you’re getting it!” The purple leader replies.
“…I suppose that would explain a lot of things,” the depressed dame states.
“Yeah like those sasquatches,” Sierra states pointing.
The after mentioned sasquatches growl in rage.
SG is shown in the confessional. “The sasquatches were kind of unexpected…but I figured we’d see them sometime because at least one appears every season. I mean it was scary because they wanted to kill us…but kind of felt old. I mean couldn’t something new kill us? I mean why not just bring in the bear that always appears while you’re at.”
The team with the long name I don’t feel like typing, run from the sasquatches. And also the bear that always appears. THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR BEING SASSY!
Sierra trips and falls into the bushes escaping the Bigfoots.
“Well that was lucky,” the uber fan states. “At least I’m out of danger.” Ping! A tranquilizer dart hits Sierra in the neck and knocks her out cold. A mysterious man in a lab coat takes her and drags her into danger…
At about the same time, Team Indestructible continues to search. Bridgette tags along slowly.
“Do you want to rest?” Courtney asks. “Because…”
“I appreciate the concern,” the surfer heaves tiredly. “But I can handle this. You don’t need to worry too much ok Courts?”
“Ok,” the worried friend replies.
“So Jovi what is our plan?” Nate asks.
“Well we have to find one of the ways the interns supposedly set up,” the redhead replies. “We just have to keep looking. It’s best we stay in a group, that way we don’t get separated.”
“At least nothing crazy has happened,” Rosamond states.
But then a strange noise emits and bright green lights hover above the air. The contestants look up to see in their astonishment, UFOs!
“It’s aliens,” Rosamond states. “…Cool!”
Three little green men beam down to earth and appear in front of the mystified team.
“Take us to your leader,” one of the alien states.
Jovi steps forward. “I’m the leader.”
“Really?” one of the aliens asks. “I thought the brunette girl would be?”
"What?” Jovi asks.
“Ha!” Courtney says laughing. “Finally, someone sees it. Step down Jovi, I’ve dealt with aliens before.”
“Oh right,” the redhead replies with an eye roll. “I think it be best if we just forget the Area 51 episode. I’m doing this.”
“They clearly want to talk to me,” The C.I.T states.
“No they wanna talk to the leader,” Jovi replies. “Me.”
The two proceed to argue.
“Do they always do this?” an aliens whispers to Rosamond.
“Pretty much,” Rosamond replies.
“So are they friends or what?” the little green man asks.
“…It’s complicated,” the cat girl replies.
As the two continue to argue, Julie’s team regroups, having escaped the sasquatches (and bear).
“Is everyone okay?” Julie asks.
Her teammates nod.
“Thank goodness we escaped those sasquatches,” the fourth wall fanatic states.
“Forget the sasquatches,” Cody says. “I’m just glad I wasn’t mauled by a bear again! Where did it even come from?”
>“The same place all of this is coming from,” Julie replies. “A hideous fanfic author! But we’re glad to the accident didn’t repeat. Right Sierra?”
Sierra doesn’t answer.
“Sierra?” her friend calls out. “Sierra? Sierra? Sierra? SIERRA!”
“Calm down,” Nellie states. “I’m sure she’s ok.”
“Oh no!” Mikey exclaims looking in the bushes. “Look!”
He holds up a purple, heart shaped wallet.
“It’s Sierra’s wallet!” the short boy states.
“Are you sure?” Cody asks.
Mikey drops down a pamphlet of pictures of Cody and the Fun Bunch.
“It even has her last name on it,” Mikey states. “Mist!”
“Wait so her name is… Sierra Mist?” Gwen asks.
"We can lament on the irony of her being named after soda later,” Mikey states. “But we have to find her before…
“AHHH!”
Sierra screams, echoing in the jungle.
“SIERRA!” Mikey and Julie scream in unison.
“Look,” SG states. “In the mud near the bush. There’s a trail of footprints along with something that looks like it’s been dragged!”
“Well let’s follow them already and find Sierra,” Nellie states.
The team rushes off…
...Simultaneously, the Bulldogs have almost completed construction of their boats.
“Great work everyone,” Bradley says. “Lindsay and Heather should be coming back any moment with the last bit of grass to construct our raft…”
Suddenly Lindsay comes running in screaming.
“Lindsay?” Bradley says confused. “…Where’s Heather?”
“We were chased off by a tiger,” the blond states.
“Tigers don’t live in this area,” Barbie states.
“Well one chased us,” the bombshell replies. “I must have lost Heather, I’m not sure where she went.”
“Come on guys,” Bradley states. “We have to find her. This can wait.”
The team gets up and goes off in searching of Heather…
…In a mysterious building in the forest, Sierra is strapped on to a table in a laboratory.
“Who are you?” Sierra asks to a man pouring bottles.
“Just a scientist,” the man replies grinning from ear to ear.
“Why have you kidnapped me?” the uber fan asks.
“I was told I could find some ‘test subjects’ here on this time,” the scientist replies. “And I was told right! You’ll do perfectly!”
“What’s your experiment?” Sierra queries nervously, gulping.
“To test out a new weapon,” the scientist replies. “A spray that would cause someone to lose control of their muscles and distort them! It could be used to end wars and stop crime! But the scientific community said I was crazy! Said it was unethical to test on humans and was a violent experiment!”
“Well…it kind of is,” Sierra replies.
“Oh it most certainly is,” the mad scientist replies. “But I didn’t like hearing it. So now my new employer has given me this lab here and provided me you, a test subject for hopefully my final batch!”
“But why me?” Sierra asks. “And who is your employer?”
“It seems I’ve said too much,” the madman states. “Sorry, it’s lonely in a secret lab. But I will tell you that you’re perfect for my test. I need a pretty face like yours to see if my toxin can distort!”
“I’d be so scared,” Sierra says. “If I wasn’t flattered at being told I have a pretty face. Thank you.”
“No problem,” the evil inventor replies. “But would you give a scream please, for me? It helps.”
“Oh sure,” Sierra states sweetly, as proceeds to clear her throat. “…AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! HELP ME, HELP ME, HELP ME! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”
“That was good scream,” the scientist replies. He proceeds to inject her with a serum that knocks her out. “But now no one can help you now! The only question is; will you die slowly or quickly?”
BANG!
The scientist turns to see his door busted down and a team of teams rushing through.
“The door was unlocked,” the doctor states.
“Let go of Sierra,” Julie states. “Now.”
“Hmm what’s the word I’m looking for?” the scientist asks. “…Heck no!”
He slams his fist against the wall and two doors open, proceeding to let out a swarm of robots made of scarp. The army rushed forward to escape with the doctor took Sierra into another room.
“Sierra!” Julie screams rushing forward as her team follows her into battle.
What followed next was a blood bath…or an oil bath. The robots were unmerciful slaughtered.
Julie pounces on a robot, ripping it’s head off. Another tries to swing at her, but she grabs its arm with her bare teeth, and rips it out of its socket. Another tries to sneak up on her, but she simply punches through its torso and rips out its processor, like pulling out its heart.
Mikey was killing these robots as well. Moving fast, he kicks their heads off. A robot charges at him, but Mikey flips over them and then karate chops their back, splitting it allowing him to pull out the wires and kill the bot.
The rest of the team tried their best to fight the bots. Though they weren’t slaughtering them like their leader or the short boy, they were defeating them in a few blows.
Many robots fall, but they kept coming and coming with no end in sight. While the others are distracted fighting, Nellie notices this.
Stepping back from the fight Nellie looks at the scene.
“These robots are weak,” Nellie thinks to herself. “Cheaply manufactured out old materials. They’re almost too easy to take down. But cheap manufacturing means timesaving building and which means making large quantities easily. He has a whole room of these robots…we are going to eventually get worn down. Or take too long fighting and by then…
…No. There has to be a way to defeat them. …They’re poorly made, probably faulty…”
Nellie looks around for something. She looks up and rushes off to the wall.
“There are too many,” Cody states as robot chokes him.
“No…” Julie says as a robot punches her.
WAH! WAH! WAH!
The contestants look up to see a fire sprinkler system going off. Water falls down, quickly shorting out the robots.
“Huh?” Julie asks. She sees Nellie near a fire alarm on the wall. She pulls the switch up, turning off the alarm.
Julie smiles and rushes to hug her friend, saying, “Great thinking Nellie!”
“Thanks,” the depressed dame replies. “Now…lets rescue Sierra.”
BANG!
The team knocks down the door into the scientist’s room.
“That door was also unlocked,” the scientist states.
“Guys!” Sierra says, now awake. “You’re here!”
“We’d never leave you when you’re in danger!” Julie shouts. “Now listen you freak, give me my friend or this gets uglier than you.”
“Ouch,” the scientist says. “That hurts, just like you will be!”
The scientist presses a button and a dome appears around him and Sierra. Speakers then pop up and blast Sierra’s team with a high pierced sound.
“No!” Sierra shouts. “…YOLO!”
Sierra breaks free of her binds and breaks the doctor’s control pad.
“…How did you escape?” the mad scientist asks.
“With…THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP!” Sierra shouts as breaks the dome and begins pummeling on the doctor.
“FRIENDSHIP!” Julie shouts as she joins the beating.
Jenny and Toby are shown in the confessional. “Hi, I’m fan favorite and underrated character Jenny,” the redhead states. “And this is my sidekick, stunt double and resident ugly person Toby.”
“Great introduction,” Toby states.
“Really?” Jenny asks.
“NO,” the blonde boy replies.
“YOUR MOM!” Jenny shouts. “Now as I was saying, we are hear to talk to you about a very serious topic that has likely come up in this previous scene. The power of friendship.”
“The power of friendship isn’t something to be taken lightly,” Toby says. “It’s a very powerful thing and isn’t even legal in some states and parts of Canada.”
Jenny nods adding, “It can cause an increase in strength or energy, as you saw. But it’s very dangerous. The power of friendship is highly addictive and causes various side affects, such as Harlem Shaking, Shauhsuahsauhshua Laugh, and the runs.”
“And remember” Toby says. “And you should never take it just because someone says ‘it’s cool.’
“It’s not cool,” Jenny states. “It’s deadly.”
The More You Know sign appears on screen.
Back to the actual plot (which barely makes more sense) Sierra and Julie deliver the final blow to the mad scientist, each punching him on one side of the face. Clutching his stomach, he goes down muttering something. “…ROTI…”
The Saboteur's Gambit Begins As Someone's Journey Ends...
The two purple haired girls, panting and gasping, look at each other and smile.
“Are you all right?” Julie asks her taller friend.
“Fine,” Sierra replies smiling. “I’m so glad you guys found me!”
“Of course,” Nellie replies. “Sorry we weren’t fast enough.”
“You're fine,” the uber fan replies hugging Nellie. “So how did you find me?”
“Mikey found your wallet and realized you were in danger,” the depressed dame replies.
“Really?” Sierra asks. “Wow…thanks for saving me Mikey…again.”
“…No problem,” Mikey replies blushing and returning her wallet.
“We should probably leave before something bad happens,” Cody states.
“You are so right!” Sierra says hugging Cody.
“What could possibly go wrong after all this?” SG asks.
“Unconnected signal with control pad for extended amount of time,” a computer voice states. “Self destruct initiated. One minute to explosion.”
“…Crap,” Julie states.
She slings the unconscious bad guy over her shoulder. “Whelp, time to escape before we die! Sierra, would you like first scream as we run away?”
“Sure,” Sierra replies. “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”
>The team runs like madmen out of the door as the lab explodes behind them.
Are you tried of this stock footage explosion gag yet :P
Meanwhile, Bradley finds himself walking alone in the forest.
“How did those idiots all manage to get spilt up from me?” Bradley asks. “Is the forest that big?”
“Bradley?” a voice calls.
“Huh?” the jock asks. “…Heather? Is that you? Where are you?”
“Up here,” Heather states from up in a tree. “I got chased up here by a tiger. And yes, I know that doesn’t make any sense.”
“Jump down,” Bradley states. “I’ll catch you.”
“Ok,” the mean girl states. “But don’t drop me.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” the jock states.
He catches Heather in his arms and lets her down to stand.
“Thanks,” Heather states.
“I’m just glad you’re ok,” Bradley replies.
“Afraid you lost your only competent alliance member?” Heather asks brushing herself off.
“More than that,” Bradley states. “I was afraid you were hurt or injured. It meant you might have to leave or you couldn’t walk or run or do other foot stuff.”
Heather looked at Bradley. He was smiling, a happy genuine smile.
“Bradley,” she states. “…Wait what is foot stuff?”
Suddenly a sasquatch jumps out. The two run as the Bigfoot chases them.
“Heather make sure to stay with me,” Bradley states. “It’s really easy to get lost around here. Okay? Heather? Heather?”
He turns around to see she is not behind him.
“Dang it!” Bradley shouts. “I wonder if anyone else has this problem.”
Meanwhile Courtney and Jovi continue arguing.
“Oh yeah,” Courtney states. “Well let’s have the aliens decide. Where are they?”
“They left,” Rosamond states. “…Ten minutes ago.”
“Oh,” Jovi and Courtney state.
“Maybe we should get back to the challenge,” Bridgette states. “If it isn’t already won.”
“Agreed,” Jovi states as she and her team move on out. “But make sure to stick together, it seems like it’s really easy to get separated and just be one of us. Okay guys? Guys?”
She turns around to see no one is behind her.
“Dang it!” Jovi shouts. “I wonder if anyone else has this problem.”
Julie’s team, tired and worn, continues on from the remains of the lab. Julie carries the unconscious scientist on her shoulder.
“Hey look!” Cody states. “A boat!”
The team rushes forward to see a speedboat, with Total Drama written on the side.
Julie and Sierra hop into the boat and begin searching.
“It must be one of the ways to escape set up by the interns!” Sierra cheers. “It even has a full tank of gas!”
Julie opens the glove compartment and pulls out a note and the keys to the boat.
“Congratulations,” Julie reads. “Teams, here is a way to win, so get all your teammates and hop in! These keys make the boat go and will help you win the show! So sail away to earn a fun day!”
“Wait…what if it’s some kind of trap?” Sierra asks.
“I recognize this handwriting,” Julie says pointing to the letter. “It’s by Pepper, the friendly intern that helped me when I was injured! This is really convenient! …This is the part where you complain Nellie.”
Julie turns to see Nellie isn’t with them.
“Oh no,” Julie states. “Nellie must have gotten separated and is in the forest! We have to rescue her!”
“What about the boat?” Cody asks.
“Finding Nellie is our top priority,” the purple leader states. “I’ll take the keys with me so no one can take the speedboat. Now let us hurry!”
Julie charges forward and her team follows, going deep into the tropical forest.
“Now be careful,” Julie says. “Nellie shows how easy it is to get lost so let’s all stick together. Right? Team?”
Julie turns around to see no one is behind her.
“Dang it!” the psycho shouts. “Another stupid overused running gag…”
A little later, amidst all the chaos a lone person stumbled upon a speedboat, a sea worthy vessel with a few strands of familiar purple hair upon it. Creeping cautiously to the boat, the mysterious person smiles at the lone vehicle.
The figure thinks to themself, “Ha, ha, ha. How dense. Leaving this boat unguarded. You should be so much more careful. I guess it’ll take a genius like me to teach them!”
The mysterious one didn’t drive off though; the keys weren’t here, being with someone else. The lone soul had no way of moving it, they weren’t familiar with boats and though they thought about hotwiring it they had never hotwired a vehicle before, so the idea wasn’t taken very seriously.
“That was smart, I’ll give them that,” the unknown thinks. “But someone with my smarts won’t be stopped by something like this.”
Thinking, the schemer came up with a wicked idea. The fiend set their plan into motion. Then after quickly completing their work, the person made sure to leave no trace. None…except for a letter in the glove compartment.
…And so the saboteur began their gambit.
The scene changes to Mikey running through the forest. Turning to look back, he trips on a stick. Looking up, to see a hand reaching out to him…
“You okay?” Nellie asks as she helps Mikey help.
“Yeah,” Mikey replies. “We were just looking for you…are you okay?”
Nellie nods. “I got lost. Though I suppose I was found unlike the average 900,000 people reported missing every year in America.”
“Yeah,” the short boy states. “The team was looking for you when I got separated, and I assume they did as well. We should find them…”
The two move forward, looking down at the ground. Mikey separates himself, giving the two a large amount of space. An awkward silence follows for awhile.
…I’m sorry,” Nellie states. “I’m very sorry. You don’t deserve the treatment you’ve gotten.”
“No,” Mikey replies. “I do. I hurt you guys after you had taken me in and trusted me. You were my friends and I betrayed you…”
“So that means you should be shunned?” Nellie asks. “Be berated and excluded for so long? I mean you should’ve at least gotten a chance to explain yourself. …But we didn’t even give you that.”
Another awkward silence follows. The two exit from a row of trees.
“…We found a boat,” Mikey states. “I think it’s this way. It has gas and we can get off.”
Again, quiet seeps in.
“…Can I ask you something?” the depressed dame says. “Why did you vote for Julie? I mean I believe SG did because of love, but I don’t get love…”
“…Then you won’t understand why I did this,” Mikey mutters.
Nellie stops and looks at Mikey. “What do you mean?”
“…I’m in love…with Sierra,” Mikey states.
Nellie reacts with wide eyes.
“I know,” Mikey replies. “How could I be such a horrible friend as to have a crush on her? But I can’t help it. When I first saw her on the show I developed a crush on her. And being her with her, I just fall in love with her more!”
“So why did you vote off Julie?” the depressed girl asks.
“Well,” the blonde boy replies. “Gwen tricked me I guess. She said Julie was evil and she was planning on hurting Sierra. She has had experience dealing with villains on this show and she had convinced SG so it seemed kind of plausible. And I was so smitten with Sierra that I got blinded by love…and I failed you guys.”
“It’s ok Mikey,” Nellie reassures. “You were trying to do what’s best. …Maybe you should talk to Sierra about your feelings.”
Mikey sighs. “She hates me for what I’ve done. What’s the point?”
“…I don’t know,” Nellie replies. “Like I said, I don’t get love. But you’re a nice guy; hanging with you didn’t make me more depressed. And I think if you told Sierra maybe she would like you…or at least understand.”
The two continue walking, not saying much, and soon reach the boat, finding their team waiting.
“Nellie you’re safe!” Julie and Sierra proclaim glomping the girl.
“I’m fine,” Nellie states as the two girls crush her. “Mikey found me.”
“Yeah,” Mikey replies. “Um…we should go before we lose.”
“All right everyone in!” Julie says. “We have a challenge to win!”
They quickly hop into the speedboat and drive off, not noticing something very different…
Meanwhile, Barbie walks out of the forest to find her team except for Bradley and Cosmic River.
“Crap!” Heather shouts. “It’s just the teletubby.”
“I guess the tiger didn’t eat you,” Barbie states dryly. “Although I guess I wouldn’t eat a piece of s*** either. …Where’s Cosmic River?”
“I saw Rapunzel get chased off by a Sasquatch and a bear while I was getting chased,” Chef Hatchet states.
Barbie looks down quietly. She then notices something out of the corner of her.
“Where are the boats?” the morbid goth asks. “They were down at that end of the beach.”
The others turn to see their work gone and raise their eyebrows at one another.
“Really?” Barbie asks. “Everyone was too busy waiting for Narcissus to notice they’re gone?”
Bradley then runs in. “There you guys are.”
“Speak of the devil,” Barbie mutters.
“Bradley!” Lindsay exclaims happily hugging her boyfriend. “I’m glad you’re okay!”
“Of course,” Bradley replies. “I wouldn’t leave you babe.”
He turns to Heather asking, “Where did you go? You were right behind me and then not.”
“I know,” Heather replies. “I got lost from you but made my way back. …Thanks for rescuing me.”
“No problem,” Bradley replies smiling and looking deeply at Heather.
“I hate to ruin the moment here between the taken man and his woman on the side,” Barbie sardonically states. “But we have the problem of having a missing teammate and no boats.”
“What?” Bradley asks.
He hurries down to the shoreline and notices the missing boats.
“But…” Bradley says seeing only their tools.
“Yoo-hoo!” A voice calls out from sea.
Bradley looks out to see Team Indestructible in their rafts paddling off to the cruise. Courtney is standing up, waving towards the jock.
“What The Heck?” Bradley asks.
“I hope you don’t mind us borrowing these,” Courtney calls. “We’ll return them after the challenge.”
“You stole our boats!” Bradley shouts.
“Stole?” Courtney repeats, mockingly scoffing. “We improved your unfinished work. Heck, maybe they’re ours now."
“You’d really take our boats and leave us here?” the angry jock calls.
Courtney’s face then becomes a smirk bigger than the Cheshire Cat’s grin, replying mockingly, “Don’t get your panties in a twist. This is a competition; it’s cut throat and if you can’t deal with it, too bad. Get real or go home.”
With that, the C.I.T. sits down leaving Bradley’s mouth hanging open.
“You really love using someone’s words against them huh?” Jovi asks.
“So much,” Courtney replies.
“Great we’re doomed,” Bradley replies.
“Not yet cool cats,” A voice states.
Cosmic River walks out of the forest.
“Glad to see you’re safe,” Barbie states.
“Wait did you find a way off?” Heather asks.
“No,” the hippie replies. “But I made some a groovy friend. Hey Cameron, would you give us a hand.”
A Sasquatch walks out of the forest smiling at Cosmic River...
Soon…The Bulldogs are out onto the ocean, riding on the back of Cameron, who paddles quickly.
“Ha!” Heather laughs. “Eat it Courtney!”
“Eat what?” Courtney asks.
The Bulldogs, now in sight of the cruise ship, see Team Indestructible standing on the cruise ship.
“Eat a five star meal here while I have a massage?” Courtney asks. “Well, I will do that Heather, thanks for the suggestion!” Heather curses under her breath.
“At least we beat the Screaming Who Knows What Avengers or Something,” Chef states.
“It’s pronounced The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice!” Julie shouts.
The Bulldogs gasp as Julie and her team speed by the Bulldogs, too fast for them to catch up.
“Can’t he go any faster?” the queen bee asks.
“Actually Cameron is a chick,” the hippie replies.
“Woo!” Julie cheers. “Nothing can stop us now!”
Suddenly the boat slows down and halts to a stop.
“Except an empty gas tank,” Nellie replies looking at the meter.
“Sucks to suck!” Bradley shouts as Cameron swims by and reaches the cruise ship.
“Crap!” Sierra states, hitting the boat. The slam opens up the glove compartment, making a letter fall out and onto the floor.
Later, all the teams are back on the ship standing around the hosts. Cameron waves goodbye to Cosmic River (who waves back) and leaves.
“So looks like you’re the big losers today,” Chris says pointing at Julie’s team. “So now…why do you have an unconscious man in a lab coat with you?”
The team explains the story of the evil scientist and the attempt on Sierra’s life but nothing would be gained by repeating it here.
“Whoa,” Rhonda says after they’ve finished their tale.
“I can’t believe another crazy person attempted to take someone on the show’s life again,” Rosamond states.
“And did you say he said his employers told him he would test subjects on the island soon?” Jovi asks.
“Yup,” Sierra replies.
“Does he mean whoever his employers are they knew we we’re coming and wanted him to experiment on a contestant?” the worried redhead asks.
“Calm down everyone,” Chris states. “We’ll hand him over to custody and see if he can explain more.”
Pepper and her friend come and take the criminal away. Pepper also whispers into Chris’ ear and hands him a letter.
“Wait didn’t you fire her?” Courtney points out.
“We need the help,” Chris replies. “Now if you would excuse for a moment…”
Chris and the other hosts leave for a short while but return.
“Some interesting news has been brought to my attention,” Chris states. “Now long named team you apparently lost due to running out of gas, correct?”
“Yes, but I don’t know why,” Sierra states. “We had a full tank before we left.”
“You did,” Chris states. “But someone emptied it. Allow me to read this letter.”
Clearing his throat Chris reads;
To the team who failed,
I hope you weren’t planning on winning. Because you see, your fun is over for today Neanderthals. You may find yourselves clever but you have been outsmarted. I have stricken you and now you lay toiling in the fields of defeat. And though you won’t see me laughing, on the inside my sides are splitting. You simpletons are but the first to feel my genius.
--Signed the saboteur
Chris flips the paper to reveal the letter, with magazine letters cut and pasted on it. Some of the contestants gasp or widen their eyes, but they are all very quiet.
“It seems this saboteur had taken your fuel,” McLean states. “And has cost you your chances of winning today’s challenge. Reviewing confessionals and footage, we know the identity of this ‘saboteur’.”
Some of the contestants sigh in relief.
“But we’re keeping it a secret,” Chris adds smirking. “This will definitely boost the ratings! So be warned contestants, one of you maybe this saboteur, and you are going to strike again… Enjoy your reward Team Indestructible; we’ll pick you sometime tomorrow night. And long named team, I’ll you see at elimination tonight.”
Later, Julie, Sierra and Nellie are alone in third class, deep in discussion about elimination.
“Excuse me,” A voice says.
“What do you want?” Julie says to SG behind her.
“I just wanted to say that it seems Cody is targeting Mikey,” the shy boy states. “I know you hate me and it doesn’t seem that will ever change. But Mikey deserves forgiveness and to stay. We’re voting for Cody at his request, but I’m begging you, don’t send him home. Vote Gwen, Cody, heck vote me. Just not Mikey.”
“Why should we?” Julie asks. “Please,” SG asks. We made mistakes…but we are human.”
With that SG leaves quickly. Julie frowns angrily at him using her words from the pool.
“So with that I think we should vote off Mikey,” Julie states. “Cody is a potential ally and Sierra’s friend, and he hasn’t lied to us, so he should stay.”
Nellie sighs and states, “I don’t think what we’re doing is right. Do they really deserve this treatment.”
“They hurt us!” Julie replies.
“They messed up and has gotten more than needed karma; with the guilt they feel, the pranks, the shunning.” Nellie replies. “They made mistakes, but they are human.”
“Don’t quote SG,” Julie says. “He and Mikey backstabbed us.”
“He brought up a point I was already thinking,” Nellie says. “I already talked with Sierra about this… I don’t think what we’re doing is right.”
“What?” Julie asks. “You aren’t making any sense!”
“That’s a first,” Nellie murmurs to herself.
“What?” Julie asks.
“Sorry,” Nellie states. “It’s just you’re the one who usually doesn’t make sense.”
“How do I not make sense?” Julie asks.
“Are you kidding?” the depressed dame asks. “You say and do crazy things all the time.”
“Yeah I’m crazy when I’m being funny,” the psycho replies. “But I’m trying to be serious.”
“Glad to know logic isn’t serious,” the depressed girl mumbles.
“Stop,” the uber fan states. “Please stop fighting. We shouldn’t fight!”
Julie looks at Nellie and asks, “Are you mad at me Nellie?”
“No, not really,” Nellie replies. “It’s just…back in Jersey you were right about what was in the crate and you say all this crazy stuff that turns out to be true…and it makes me feel that everything I know is wrong and that I’m stupid.”
“How could you think that?” Julie asks flabbergasted. “You’re the smartest person I know! You know a lot of facts. And how you cleverly defeated those robots? Brilliant! The truth is, I’m really jealous of you two…”
“What?” her two friends ask shocked. “Why?”
“Well you’re both clearly awesome,” the purple wacko replies. “And you confident enough to be yourselves around others.”
“And you aren't,” Sierra asks. “I mean, you have an awesome personality!”
“Yeah,” Julie replies glumly. “The kind that scares people away. No one likes a person who looks and is so…different. I wish I could be like you guys, you seem more confident than me.”
“You don’t seem to be unconfident,” Nellie replies.
”I'm not with like fighting or dares," Julie replies. “But...I have no confidence when it comes to people."
"Why not?" Sierra asks. "You seem fine?"
"I try but I'm really afraid," Julie states. "When I try to make friends, people have avoided me or distanced themselves from me. This is really the first time I've had true friends who haven't left me. And I still hurt your feelings Nellie and... scared away SG."
“I wasn’t hurt because you were crazy,” the depressed dame states. “It was more that I wasn’t sure about myself. But actually, talking to you actually makes me feel less depressed. And SG was manipulated into believing that. Don't take it too hard.”
“Because I’m a freak,” Julie states. “...He actually tried talking to me the other day, sneaking into the pool area while I was injured.”
"What did he say?" Sierra asks.
So Julie retells the previous events to her friends.
"Oh Julie," Sierra says sympathetically. "I'm sorry."
"It's ok," Julie replies. "I got to emotional. I just thought...I thought SG wouldn't do this to me. I thought he was different. But he abused me, just like the others...
“Abused?!?” Sierra states worriedly.
“Not like that,” Julie replies misty eyed. “Not physically or sexually…but... well when you think no one can like you it’s really easy for someone to play with your feelings. ..I’ve been in abusive relationships before… Sometimes I just feel like no one can like a freak and so guy comes around and makes me feel special and I fall so hard and then...
...And then he has me. All he has to do is make me feel like I'm not special. Tell me how only he can love me, how no one else could love a girl with unnatural eye and hair color. And how no one can love a girl with an odd sense of humor.
You try to confront him about how he hurts you and he makes you feel like the bad guy, like how SG is making me feel. And then he makes you feel guilty and now your also a horrible person that no one could love but him. And...and he says it enough that you...you can't help but to believe it. If you leave who would you want? It's better to stay than to find yourself alone again..."
Julie wipes away her tears and says, "I know I don’t talk about my past a lot and it’s because it’s just something I’m often not comfortable talking about.”
Sierra wraps her arms around Julie and Nellie, crying.
“I love you guys,” Sierra states. “You’re the first real friends I’ve ever had! I love you guys even if you are nutty. I prefer my chocolate with nuts anyway. And I’m so sorry for everything that’s happened to you.”
“It’s ok Sierra,” Julie replies, half-heartedly chuckling. “Thank you guys for putting up with me.”
“Thanks for putting up with us,” Nellie replies.
The two leave their hug and collect their thoughts for a few moments. But wiping her eyes, Sierra asks an important question.
“So…who are we voting for?”
“I still don’t like what they did but I’m ready to forgive,” Nellie states. And tonight, I’m voting Cody.”
“I respect your decision,” Julie replies. “And maybe you’re right about the pranks. But I’m still kind of hurt and I’m not ready to forgive SG or Mikey yet. Maybe after this show but not now. I’m voting for Mikey.”
The two look towards Sierra.
“…I don’t know,” the uber fan replies. “Cody’s my friend but Mikey…I just don’t get why he did it.”
“What do you think about Mikey?” Nellie asks.
“Well I thought he was very sweet,” Sierra replies. “I still kind of do. And he’s helpful and funny…”
“Do you think you could ever see him…in a romantic sense?” Nellie asks.
Julie and Sierra widen their eyes.
Nellie sighs and explains, “When Mikey found me I asked him why he did this and he said he had feelings for you Sierra. He’s had a crush on you since he saw you on TV. And Gwen manipulated his feelings, saying to protect you he needed to vote off Julie.”
Sierra is speechless at this.
“I just thought you should know,” Nellie replies.
“I guess…I can understand that,” Julie replies. “Love makes you crazy.”
“I think I need to be alone for a moment,” Sierra states. “I’ll meet you at elimination ceremony.”
Her friends are reluctant and try to protest but at Sierra’s urging, they leave.
Sierra sits alone for a moment in the economy section…and then starts crying. Unbeknownst to her, a person sees her and comes towards her.
>“Sally, are you ok?”
Sierra looks up to see Lindsay, who looks generally considered.
“It’s…it’s nothing,” Sierra replies.
“Doesn’t look like it,” Lindsay says back. “Would please tell me what’s the matter? Maybe I can help!”
Sierra is reluctant but her emotions get the better of her, and it all comes pouring out of her.
“I’m the deciding vote,” Sierra sobs. “Between someone who loves me. But they hurt me…but only to protect me. I’ve never had someone like me before…and maybe I like him. But the other person is Cody, who I’ve always loved but doesn’t love me back.”
“Cody doesn’t love you back?” Lindsay asks. “But I heard him admit his feelings for you!”
“What?” Sierra asks.
Lindsay nods. “The other day, I was looking for Bradley and I saw the short kid admitting to himself he had fallen in love with you!”
“Cody?” Sierra asks. “The techno wizard, the one who was on your previous season, on the Screaming Gophers with you?”
“I know who Cody is,” Lindsay replies. “And I know I heard him say he loves you. I promise.”
"…I don’t know if that made my decision any easier…” Sierra says looking at the clock. “But I have to go now. …Thank you Lindsay.”
“Of course,” the blonde replies. “Anytime!”
Later, the team is at the elimination ceremony and all is silent. Sierra arrives a little late. Cody waves to her, and she waves back. She looks torwards Mikey, who blushes and turns away.
“Well we’re all here,” Chris states. “So let’s vote and end this episode all ready!”
Gwen is shown in the confessional. “It should be me going tonight. …But I can’t leave Cody when he’s on the chopping block, after he has stuck by me. I promised I’d vote with him tonight. I just hope he stays.”
She stamps a passport.
SG is shown in the confessional. “Mikey…you deserve to stay. I’m sorry I failed…I’m so sorry.”
He stamps a passport.
Nellie is shown in the confessional. “You’re a good friend Mikey and you don’t deserve any punishment. Hopefully we’ll all hang out again sometime. As for you Cody, I don’t think you like me or Julie and you aren’t what is best for Sierra.”
She stamps a passport.
Julie is shown in the confessional. “After knowing why you did what you did Mikey…I think I’ll be able to forgive you. You deserve it. But I just have to vote you off tonight. …I’m sorry.”
She stamps a passport.
The scene returns to the elimination ceremony.
“Well tonight’s votes look tough,” Chris states. “But we have some obvious people who are safe. The first barf bags go to…Sierra and Nellie.”
After tossing them their bags, Rhonda says, “The next barf bag goes to…Julie.”
“And the next barf bags go to,” Chris states. “…. SG and Gwen.”
The two look shocked for a moment but then very sad.
“Mikey, Cody,” Chris states. “There is only one barf bag left. It goes to…
“…Cody. I’m sorry Mikey, it’s time for you to go.”
Mikey stands up and sighs. “I’m ready…but can I say some things?”
“Shoot,” Chris states.
“SG, you’re a good guy,” the triceratops boy states.
“Mikey…” SG tries to say.
“No it’s cool,” Mikey replies. “I deserve this. I’m not mad at you for this. You’ll always be my bro. Please, forgive this guy. Nellie, thank you for what you did today. Julie, lead this team to victory. And Sierra…remember you’re…wonderful.”
With that Mikey takes his parachute and jumps.
Later, the team returns to third class. Cody pulls Sierra away to talk to her.
“Sierra,” Cody says. “Thank you for not voting me off. I am sorry Mikey had to go. But you’re such a good friend.”
“Thanks Cody,” Sierra replies half smiling. “Listen…someone told me something and…I just wanted to make sure it isn’t true. You didn’t admit to having on a crush on me did you?”
“What?” Cody asks shocked.
“Crazy, I know,” Sierra replies. “Probably just mindless gossip.”
“Yeah,” Cody replies. “Don’t take this the wrong way Sierra…but we work better as friends. I can’t see us in a romantic relationship.”
“Yeah,” Sierra replies. “I hear you.”
Cody and Sierra make small talk but soon leave. Alone, Sierra is once again on the verge of tears when Lindsay runs up to her.
“How did it go?” Lindsay asks hopefully.
“Cody doesn’t like me,” Sierra replies bitterly.
“But…I heard the dinosaur boy say he likes you,” Lindsay replies.
“Dinosaur boy?” Sierra asks angrily. “Dinosaur boy! DINOSAUR BOY! That was Mikey! And thanks to your advice…I voted him off!”
“But…” Lindsay tries to say.
Sierra breaks down crying again. “Just go away! You…you idiot!”
Lindsay begins to tear up as well and runs off crying.
Meanwhile Bradley is alone in the economy section when Lindsay rushes up to him and grabs him, sobbing.
“Lindsay?” Bradley asks. “Are you okay?”
Lindsay sniffles. “I ruined things Bradley. Ruined them. I’m such a horrible person. So horrible!”
Bradley seems taken back by this. “No, no you aren’t. Calm down, Lindsay. Let’s go and we can talk about this, just ourselves. But please stop crying. It’s breaking my heart.”
Lindsay looks at him and smiles a little bit.
“At least I have you,” she says tiredly. Bradley carries her off genuinely concerned.
…Later, much later, a lone contestant travels off from his team.
“Hello Nate,” a voice greets from behind him.
“Heather?” Nate asks. “You contacted me in need of my services?”
“Yup,” Heather replies. “I have a mystery concerning my teammate Bradley and I know you can solve it.”
“Why should I?” the boy detective asks.
“Because if you do I promise not to vote for your friend Rosamond,” Heather states.
“And you’d keep that promise?” Nate asks.
“Of course,” Heather replies.
The camera pans to behind her back…where her fingers are crossed…
Chapter 12 Elephant In The Room
Chris and Rhonda are shown in front of the plan.
"Last time on Total Drama," Chris recaps. "Problems arose for the cast, as SG failed to apologize to Julie, Rosamond interrupted Jovi and Nate wrong, believing they were dating, and Barbie planned revenge with Cosmic River as her ally."
"We also met some new interns," Rhonda states.
"Yeah," Chris replies. "Anyway, the contestants competed at The Bermuda Triangle, where crazy stuff happened. Specifically, a mad scientist tried to kill Julie's team. Even worse for them, someone called 'the saboteur' sabotaged the team, sending them to elimination.
"Mikey's feelings for Sierra were found out, but she reacted badly, and on poor advice from Lindsay, she sent home Mikey. Which caused her to blow her top at Lindsay. And Heather struck a deal with Nate. What will happen next on...Total Drama What The Heck?"
(Theme song plays)
Odd. That's how Bradley was feeling, or as best as he could describe it. Odd. And yet nice. Bradley, here in third class was cuddling with Lindsay, who was asleep on his chest. They were alone, no alliance members, no teammates...no one.
This was the third night they had done this. They would go their private way, alone to a section of the economy class. And just...talk. Not about strategy, just...life.
It was after the elimination of the odd team, when Lindsay came to Bradley in tears. She seemed so innocent, and yet so hurt. And Bradley just felt like comforting her.
So Bradley comforted her. He reassured her it was an honest mistake and that Sierra would forgive her. And he assured her she still had him, and he wouldn't hate her. And then...they started talking about other stuff, and listening.
And he did listen. And he learned a lot about her. He learned about how she and Beth had volunteered at camps after TDWT, from band camps, acting camps and even space camps. He learned about her sisters. He learned about how she took gymnastics as a kid and even won a medal.
And then he opened up about himself. Talking about his sports game, his workout regimen and school. He talked about his favorite band, The Eagles, and about other reality shows, which he was surprised to find Lindsay liked as well. It felt so odd to be so open with someone, so human. Odd...but nice.
Bradley was thinking this early in the morning. Lindsay is laying on him, but rolls off in her sleep. Bradley looks up at a clock. He then, slowly, creeps around Lindsay to his duffle bag. Watching Lindsay to see if she wakes, Bradley swiftly stuff a black bag up his shirt.
Slowly he tiptoes off to the exit, and down the hallway. He goes into the confessional. He exits a few minutes later. He slowly returns to Lindsay, only to find her not there. He quickly puts away the black bag and looks for Lindsay.
"Lindsay?" Bradley calls.
"Here," Lindsay replies walking in and holding two plates of food. "I thought we could go ahead and have breakfast while we talk."
"Sounds good," Bradley replies. "You were telling me about your friends from acting camp."
Lindsay smiles and begins recalling the story...
Nate is shown in the confessional, searching. "Heather thinks Bradley is keeping a secret and wants me to investigate in exchange for not voting off Rosamond. I don't know if she'll keep her end of the deal, but knowing the Bulldog's ringleader's dark secret? That could help us.
"...Except I haven't found anything. Not really. I have noticed a pattern of him waking up early and going to the confessional. But I haven't found any clues. But I will solve this mystery!"
Later the day progressed and more contestants awoke, One such was Cosmic River. The hippie had woke up and is now meditating. He is taking deep breaths, trying to calm his nervousness.
...But faling. Sighing, he got up and began to stroll. He walks to Barbie, meeting her in her secret section of the economy class.
"Hey Barbie can we talk?" Cosmic River asks.
"Sure," Barbie replies. "What's wrong?"
"I'm worried," the hippie admits. "You're very nice but you seem very angry. Not that you shouldn't be, people were puttin you down, and no one really came to your defense..."
"It's fine," the goth interrupts.
"I just," Cosmic River states. "I just don't want to be used again. People scorned can be blinded and I just wanna make sure you're honest with me."
"I understand, but why would you doubt me?" Barbie asks.
"You're a bit crpytic," the hippie replies. "You want me to trust in you, and I want to, but I just need a little more to go on. You dig?"
"Such as?" Barbie asks.
"Well," Cosmic River replies. "What kind of tricks do you have up your sleeve?"
"Lots of things," Barbie replies. "For example...from the interns I've heard about everyone's past, or at least what's know about them."
"So you know my past?" Cosmic River asks.
Barbie nods.
"Well, then I think it is fair I know yours," Cosmic River states.
Barbie sighs. "Do you know who the Mattlels are?"
"No clue," Cosmic River replies. "Why?"
"The Mattels are a family of celebrities," Barbie explains. "They're known for their attractiveness and their love of media. And sadly...their my family."
Cosmic River nearly falls out of his seat. "Are you pulling my leg?"
"No," the goth replies. "Saying I'm the black sheep in the family is an understatement. ...My family is physically attractive; blond hair, blue eyes, skinny. When I was born I was so different they..."
"...Shunned you?" Cosmic River guesses.
"That came later," Barbie answers. "They made me the star of my own reality show. They spoiled me...until they couldn't get anymore fame from me. Then I became the mistake. They signed me up for this show. That's why I'm not allowed to quit."
"Oh," the hippie quietly says. "...That's pretty heavy stuff cat."
"I don't like to talk about my past," Barbie simply states.
"Well," the hippie says. "Then... why tell me so much?"
"Like I said," the goth replies. "I know your past. I know you're a good guy. I know I can trust you."
Cosmic River smiles. His nervousness was calmed.
Barbie is shown in the confessional. "Cosmic River is a nice guy and I wanna trust him...but I can't so easily. I feel silly admitting so much about my past...but I've never been able to vent before. Still, I can't trust him so quickly, I don't want to give him the chance to backstab me."
Meanwhile, the two A-Types, Courtney and Jovi, were talking amongst themselves, alone in First Class. While the two considered each other ‘friendly’ rivals, the two were friends and after Taylor’s elimination, had agreed to decide whom to vote for together and play strategically as a team.
Their current subject matter had shifted to the recent, possibly game changing, appearance of the saboteur.
“So what do you think are course of action should be when dealing with the saboteur?” Courtney asks.
“Be careful,” Jovi replies somewhat devilishly.
The C.I.T. rolls her eyes at this remark. “I meant how are we going to be careful regarding this saboteur? What protective measures should we have and what if the saboteur sabotages us? As team captain you should have some ideas about this.”
“Oh, what do you suggest?” the captain retorts. “I set up a trap Scooby Doo style and unmask this bad guy?”
“Well we should have something,” Courtney replies, though keeping her voice calm to prevent fight.
“Any ideas on who the saboteur is?” Jovi asks.
“Well my first thought is it’s one of those Bulldogs,” Courtney replies.
“Which, Bradley, Chef or Heather?” Jovi asks.
“Any, or heck even all of them,” Courtney replies. “From what seems to be going around, Bradley carved the rumor. They seem like they would do something like that…”
“…But it feels to obvious to be them.” Jovi states.
Courtney nods. “Of course it could always be they’re so obvious we wouldn’t suspect them when they are the culprit. They’re so obvious they’re unobvious, for lack of a better term. What are your opinions on the matter?”
“This may sound odd,” the redhead replies. “But what if was one of the members of the team with the long name.”
“You think so?” the brunette asks.
“Mmm hmm,” Jovi replies. “It sounds dumb to sabotage themselves but if you do you would seem very unsuspecting.”
“Good point,” Courtney states. “But if you’d do that then you’d have to hope you wouldn’t been eliminated or have enough faith that you’re in the majority. I think that eliminates Gwen. Really, that leaves only The Fun Bunch.”
“Well they’re pretty ticked off at Julie’s elimination so maybe they did it to get revenge,” Jovi suggests. “Cody could have too, Sierra might be his ally. You think it’s a coincidence that the first real challenge Julie and Cody come back in is sabotaged?”
“Maybe,” Courtney says. “Cody didn’t seem like the type back on Team Amazon, but too long in this game does do things. Nate showed up at the same time as them, and no one knows him. It makes him a suspect.”
“I doubt Nate would do that,” Jovi replies chuckling.
“I agree but I’m just following your logic,” Courtney replies. “By the way, you don’t have a crush on Nate do you?”
Jovi gave a laugh at this. “Of course not. We both know Rosamond obviously has feelings for him.”
Courtney laughs and nods. “And I’d say he’s pretty smitten with his ‘kitten’ as well. It just seems like you’re alone with him a lot.”
“He’s friendly,” Jovi replies. “But I’m trying to set him up with Rosamond. I know some childhood romances don’t work, but they are perfect for each other. One of them just has to work up the nerve.”
“Agreed,” Courtney replies. “Back to the point, anyone else on the team who you think could’ve done it? I wasn’t with her for a bit, but I doubt Bridgette did especially with her injury. And no way it was Rosamond …or us.”
“Of course,” Jovi replies. “That just leaves…Trent. And, I don’t think he likes me.”
“Think?” Courtney responds. “You haven’t noticed the occasional glares of death in your direction from Elvis?”
Jovi shakes her head and sighs. “This is to be expected I suppose. I don’t want to think he would do it…but like you said too long in this game does things. That could even apply to the gentler souls like DJ or Lindsay.”
“Of course it could all be a twist by Chris,” Courtney states. “I think there was a show were that was the premise…”
“The Mole,” Jovi replies. “Someone was the mole or sabotaged everyone, and they had to guess who. The same idea has been done in Big Brother, though not Survivor.”
“You know your reality TV I guess,” Courtney replies.
“Yeah,” Jovi replies awkwardly laughing. “I guess I’m kind of a reality show junkie. After Total Drama, Survivor is my favorite, followed by The Amazing Race, though mostly the Brazilian editions.”
When Courtney raises an eyebrow, Jovi replies, “I have some Brazilian heritage from my mother’s side, it’s also where I get my red hair. My father’s side is very Italian, which is why I have my undertones.”
“Ah,” Courtney says. “So…did you start with Total Drama or did you watch other reality shows before that?”
“Well,” Jovi states feeling embarrassed. “I watched other shows before it, but I heard about it premiering… when someone said you were on it.”
“Me?” Courtney asks.
Jovi stands up and walks to her luggage. She pulls out something and throws it to Courtney.
Courtney catches it and stares. “Is this…my book?”
“Yup,” Jovi replies. “Total Triumph For Teens. This book has actually really helped me, with a lot of things.”
“Of course,” Courtney teases. “I’m guessing your whole leadership strategy is based on my advice. If you win, I think you owe me some of your earnings in return.”
“Ha, ha, ha,” Jovi replies snatching her book away.
“Really though, that’s actually really touching,” Courtney states. “I’m a little honored. ...What do you say we go to the Mess Hall and get some breakfast.”
“Fine,” Jovi states still a little peeved. “I’ll lead the way.”
“Thanks to my book,” Courtney states jokingly as the two girls leave.
“You know,” Jovi states as they continue walking. “We’re kind of in an alliance huh?”
“I guess so,” Courtney replies. “Most friendships work like alliances.”
Should we refer to ourselves as an alliance?” Jovi asks.
“Nah,” Courtney replies. “On this show alliances are often seen as negative, though they aren’t always. Not to mention alliances kind of seem like deals to meet an end, and I don’t see our friendship as that.”
“Well that makes one of us,” Jovi teases. “Still if we had one, ‘The A-Type Alliance’ has a nice ring to it.”
The two girls enter the cafeteria and see Bridgette sitting at a table reading a magazine.
The two semi-rivals walk over to the surfer and sit next to her. The girls greet each other and proceed to talk.
"What are you reading?" Courtney asks.
"A fashion magazine," Bridgette replies. "I was given it along with a bunch of others in the infirmary."
"I bet you're going to miss this special treatment," Courtney states. "You'll be better in two days right?"
"Yup," Bridgette replies. "I'm just glad I'll be able to pull my own weight soon."
"You're fine," Jovi says.
The three girls look at the magazine as Rosamond and her cats, approach the three.
"Hey everyone," Rosamond says. "What's up?"
"Just looking at this magazine," Bridgette states. "Here come look at this model, she's gorgeous."
Rosamond sits down and looks at the magazine. Her face sours immediately after she does.
"How old is she?" Jovi asks. "She looks twenty."
"Is looks like these even obtainable?" Courtney asks.
Rosamond abruptly stands up. "I'm going to go, I need fresh air."
She walks off somewhat briskly, her cats chasing after her. Nate enters the mess hall however, and approaches her.
"Hey Rosamond," Nate says. "I'm glad I caught you. I was wondering if you might wanna go to the pool? You know, just you, me and the cats."
"Oh," Rosamond states. "I'm sorry, I need to be alone right now. But I'm sure Jovi would. Sorry."
Rosamond is shown in the confessional. "I hate turning down Nate, but it would just feel too awkward knowing he's secretly dating Jovi. I'm sure he'd rather spend time with her anyway."
Nate sulks over to the other Team Indestructible girls.
"What's wrong?" Jovi asks.
"I took your advice," Nate replies. "Try and spend some time alone with her, to work up the nerve. But she wanted to be alone. She said she thought you would want to."
"She's been acting weird lately," Jovi states. "We were looking at this magazine and she suddenly leaves after just getting here."
"Odd," Nate replies. "Can I see the magazine?"
Jovi nods and shows Nate the section they were looking at. As Nate flips through the pages, his eyes grow wide like dinner plates.
"What?" Jovi asks. "What is it?"
"Nothing," the detective replies. "Nothing at all."
"Oh please," Courtney states. "You obviously saw something, just tell us."
"Okay, there is something," Nate replies. "But...it's a sensitive subject. If you wanna be respectful to Rosamond you should drop it. If you excuse me, I'm going to go sleuth."
Nate walks away before the girls can say another word.
"So Nate wants to hold out a mystrey huh?" Jovi asks. "Looks like it's up to me to fix this."
"Are you sure you should?" Bridgette asks.
"Don't worry," Jovi replies. "I know what I'm doing."
Meanwhile Sierra, Julie and Nellie are in the economy section, eating breakfast in there.
Sierra is picking at her food, making a face out of her two eggs and a piece of bacon. The face smiles, before she flips the bacon with her fork.
“Sierra we have a challenge today,” Julie states. “You need to eat.”
“I’m not hungry,” Sierra replies.
“We know you’re upset Sierra,” Julie replies. “But you need to perk up. I’m sorry, I would change what I did if I could.”
“I’m not mad at you,” Sierra says. “I’m mad at myself, for being so stupid…”
“Mikey might not be here,” Nellie interrupts. “But if he was he’d tell you you’re better than this and you shouldn’t act this way.”
“I guess you’re right,” Sierra replies as she begins eating her food.
Julie is shown in the confessional. “Seeing how upset Sierra is over losing Mikey…it’s a pain that’s so hard to describe. Before I was voted off I did kind of think Mikey and Sierra would make a cute couple. And seeing how tragic and misunderstand this ended up being…was it really all worth it? Did I lose sight of something important when I became obsessed with revenge? I didn’t break the bond of the Fun Bunch, but I didn’t work to mend it. I really feel guilty about this…and shouldn’t I?”
As the Fun Bunch continues to eat, the PA system turns on. “Attention contestants, we’ll meeting in the elimination room for an important discussion before the challenge today. You have ten minutes to get ready and get there. McLean out!”
A little bit later, all the contestants gathered in the elimination room and sat in the bleachers, as the hosts faces them.
“As you know today we have a challenge,” Chris begins. “But we have some matters to discuss before we land. As you know, last challenge at the Bermuda Triangle, there was a minor incident of an evil scientist who almost experimented on a kidnapped Sierra.”
“He was there, saying his new employers said their would people there he could test on. The scientist is in custody and is being interrogated on what he was doing and how he knew we would be there. We want to remind you there is no reason to be alarmed by this incident.”
“Even though it seems a pattern is being formed with crazy people trying to kill you guys,” Jenny states.
“Thank you Jenny,” Chris replies. “As I was saying there is no reason to panic. …However, the scientist isn’t really cooperating well, so we’re here to see if any of you have any information that can help us find out more about this guy.”
The contestants shake their heads and give blanks looks. A few say they know or saw nothing, or recap the encounter.
“So no one has anything useful to this investigation?” Rhonda asks.
The contestants remain silent for a moment before Nellie speaks up. “I’m just remembering this, when the scientist was beaten, right before he fell and became unconscious, I think I heard him murmur something. I’m not sure but I believe it was…R,O,T,I.”
“Hmm, why does that sound familiar?” the charismatic host asks out loud.
“Wait, wasn’t R.O.TI. the working title of the original fourth season,” SG states. “Before it got cancelled, and then later picked up by the new network for this season?”
“BS is right!” Chef exclaims. “R.O.T.I. was the original fourth season before the plug was pulled and I was replaced by the plump frump.”
“I never remember a season called R.O.T.I.?” Heather states.
“You weren’t in that season,” Chef replies. “R.O.T.I. had thirteen all new contestants competing. The title was ‘Total Drama Revenge Of The Island’ or R.O.T.I. for short. It was called that because we went back to the island from the first season. ‘Cept it was filled with a bunch of mutated critters.”
“Mutated?” Jovi asks.
“During World Tour I rented the island out to a company who disposed of a bunch of radioactive waste on the island,” Chris replies. “It kind of mutated all the wildlife, changed the landscape and climate, and may have caused one or two people to turn into giant monsters…”
“That’s awful man,” Cosmic River states.
“Yeah some other hippie from the failed season thought so too,” Chris replies. “She petitioned a cleanup act for the island which has almost fixed it, removing the material, reintroducing species along with giving homes for new species, other hippie junk. The clean up act was called 'Beasts of Wawanakwa'. Our new network owns the rights to the island and help pay to clean it.”
“Wait what happened with the fourth season?” Jovi asks.
“We got through the first episode,” Chef states. “Formed teams, had our first elimination, everything went smoothly. But the next day some incident with one of the squirrels that shot lightning happened and someone claimed they got disfigured… It was a big think. Then not too long afterwards the network cancelled us, saying we were too expensive and didn’t test well. So we stopped filming, and sent everyone home.”
“What happened to the contestants from that season?” Jovi asks.
“Who cares?” Chef asks.
“Well I mean there was that controversy about the squirrel,” Jovi states. “And the show ended before a winner was crowned, how did that go over?”
“It’s actually hilarious,” Chris replies. “After the show was cancelled we thought they might try and pull something so before we said it was cancelled, we tricked them into signing some contracts, saying it was part of the next challenge! They bought it and thanks to it, couldn’t sue for anything!”
Courtney is shown in the confessional. “Those former contestants should’ve followed the golden rule; always read a contract first. I do that, even when just updating my iTunes.”
“Hoo, that was pretty funny,” Chef states. “But the scientist saying that is probably just a coincidence.”
“Wait, what?” Jovi asks. “You think it’s a coincidence that the title of Total Drama’s failed fourth season that ended bitterly is said by a mysterious scientist who is attacking the cast of Total Drama’s new fourth season that replaced it?”
“That’s what I said dummy!” Chef shouts.
“Well hopefully this mess will work itself out,” Chris replies. “But for now we have places to be and things to see! First we’ll be showing you the sweet reward to the team who wins. Following that we’ll begin the first part of our challenge…in India!”
Jovi is shown in the confessional. “I’ve noticed that we seen to be showing off the challenge rewards for a bit now, usually some fabulous expensive thing. I’m guessing this is some form of product placement courtesy of our higher ups.”
The scene changes to contestants and two main hosts driving in a bus. The bus pulls up by a somewhat large building.
"Welcome to the Princewood Relaxing Sauna Spa,” Chris states. “This is one of the many locations of a luxurious and talented spa center. Based on the title, can anyone tell me what their specialty is here?”
“Um…is it massages?” Lindsay asks.
“…Close,” Chris states. “It’s their saunas. Allow me to show you all a closer look.”
A little later, the contestants enter the spa, which is a buzz with people. They make their way to a hall with wooden walls and big metal doors, with buttons on the outside. Chris opens a door and hurries the contestants in.
Inside is a small wooden room with a few benches.
“This is very state of the art,” Chris explains pointing to a vent. “These doors have automatic locks and the steam can be activated from right outside the door. The winners will get to enjoy these wonderful saunas and other spa treatments…”
Suddenly, a short Indian woman barges in and begins screaming at them in a foreign language.
“Um miss?” Chris says. “Miss I was just…”
The little woman shouts more and starts swatting Chris on the head with a broom repeatedly.
“All right we’re leaving!” Chris shouts. “Sheesh…”
Chris and Rhonda rush out the contestants as the Indian woman chases them out. The reality show stars run out of the building as the little woman slams the door of the sauna they were just in.
She presses a few buttons, locking the room and activating the steam in the room, prepping it for a future client.
What she didn’t notice was that two people were left, trapped in the sauna.
A Steamy Afternoon
Meanwhile, the remaining contestants and the hosts reloaded up into the bus.
“Drive,” Chris states to Rhonda.
Rhonda begins speeding off.
“Wait, did you take a headcount?” Rhonda asks, still driving.
“Of course,” Chris states filing his nails. “We’re all here.”
“Ahhh! One of us isn’t here!” Sierra shouts.
“Actually,” Rosamond states. “I think it’s two people. I don’t see SG or Julie.”
“…This is not my fault,” Chris replies.
“Of course,” Rhonda says rolling her eyes.
“Everyone calm down,” Chris states. “They must have gotten separated on the streets. We’ll send a squad of interns from the plane to search for them. …Rhonda, send out a squad of interns to find them.”
Rhonda sighs.
Later, bus is parked outside of some theather. The contestants enter the theather to find a big stage, a runway. Chris stands on the runway.
“Now onto the challenge,” Chris states. “Today’s challenge will be themed around the Taj Mahal! The Taj Mahal is a beautiful work of art, and was built by an emperor in remembrance of his wife.”<
“Wait if the challenge is themed around the Taj Mahal,” Courtney says. “Why aren’t we at the Taj Mahal!”
“That comes in the second part of the challenge,” Chris replies. “The first part will get you an advantage for the second part. Now, since the Taj Mahal was dedicated to the emperor’s wife, your first challenge relates to wives. You will be making a wedding dress, in the style of a dress called a sari, worn by many women.”
Chris snaps his fingers and the two recurring interns wheel out baskets of cloth.
“You’ll have a few hours to design and sew your outfit, which one of your teammates must model, then three judges will pick the best outfit that was modeled best, which will be included in a fashion show here. There is a catch…”
“Surprise, surprise,” Courtney mumbles.
“…We’ve already picked the designers and models,” the master of ceremonies continues. “You can help the designers, but if they didn’t have a large creative input you automatically lose. And we have the camera footage, so we can tell.”
“Now then,” Rhonda says. “The designers are Cody, Bridgette and Lindsay.”
“Isn’t Lindsay really good at fashion,” Nate whispers.
“She wasn’t in the Paris last season,” Courtney whispers back. “But that was boy’s clothing, and she may have been experimenting with art styles.”
“As for the models,” the co-host goes on. “Gwen, Courtney, and…Chef.”
Chef is shown in the confessional. “Of course that fathead made me the model. It’s the cleverest thing she can thing to do. But unlike the dipstick I’m not ashamed of my body. Heck, I look better in a dress than she does.”
The contestants began to get to work. Each team was given a somewhat spacious room to design and sew a sari, all on the same hallway, while a room with many colored cloths was at the end of the hallway.
Cody wasn’t a master of dress design, and though he did have a few ideas of outfits he’d like to see Gwen in, he wanted something respectful of Gwen, and decided to go with a gray and teal, long sleeved, modest sari.
Contrary to her World Tour appearance, Lindsay did have a great sense of fashion. Lindsay had never designed or worn a sari, but she made a mental note to herself to buy one after the show. Lindsay decided to go with a girly route, and hot pink was chosen as the central color.
Lindsay thought black would complement it rather well, and proposed a black pashmina go with the dress. Lindsay began crafting away, while Bradley did his best to help.
Barbie and Cosmic River, the outcasts of the team, brought supplies, while Heather and DJ slightly, helped prepare Chef to model.
Bridgette thought it was an odd coincidence that she had received these fashion magazines and was then being a fashion designer. According to one of her magazines, Eggplant [a dark purple hue] was a universally flattering color. The magazine detailed that it falls into the middle of the color spectrum, not being too warm or too cool a color.
It said, that ‘jewel tones’, such as an emerald green would compliment eggplant. Bridgette decided to take the advice, and craft a dress like that for Courtney.
Meanwhile, SG and Julie have found themselves trapped in the sauna. Currently SG is slamming his body against the door.
“Stop,” Julie states. “The locks are too strong.”
“Well excuse me if I don’t wanna die in here,” SG replies.
“No one is going to die,” Julie states.
With the heat and steam of the sauna turned on, Julie and SG found themselves burning up, and it became clear to them that they could overheat in here, and possibly die.
They had tried knocking for help, but no one had heard them.
SG sighs, giving up, and sitting down on the ground. He lifts up his left arm and begins pulling off his sweatshirt, and then his undershirt.
“What are you doing?” Julie asks.
“I’m trying to stay cool,” SG replies. “This will help.”
“Just don’t take anything else off,” Julie states.
“Fine,” SG replies.
“This couldn’t get any more awkward,” Julie thinks.
A little bit later at the challenge, the outfits were completed and left in the designing rooms.
…Everyone was on their for some reason, going to the bathroom, practicing alone, or another reason…
Only one person was on the designing hallway at one point. The doors were all unlocked, and they decided to see the progress of how everyone was doing. But while this certain someone snuck about, they caused an accident. But this certain someone, thought him or herself rather clever, and quickly came up with a plan.
It wasn't hard for them after all, they were the saboteur. After their work had been done, slowly they left the hallway for a bit, no one the wiser…
A little later, everyone had slowly returned to the hallway, getting to grab their dresses, for the challenge that only started in a minute.
Suddenly a high-pitched scream filled the air. Everyone leaves their respective stations and ran to the source of the screams. Even the hosts and the staff at hand ran to the where the cry came from.
Lindsay is shown blubbering in the Bulldog’s designing room, being held in Bradley’s arms.
“What’s going on?” Bridgette asks wobbling in.
Lindsay replied with some more crying.
“What’s she going on about?” Heather asks.
“The dress,” Bradley replies. He points over to the mannequin where the remains of The Bulldog’s gorgeous sari are. Instead of the stunning dress, only its singed remains are left. On the floor is an iron.
“Did Lindsay light it on fire with the iron?” Heather asks.
“No,” Lindsay replies angrily. “I came in here and found it this way.”
“Look at the mirror,” Barbie states.
On the mirror, a note is attached. Heather walks over and picks it up. Clearing her throat she reads,
To the designers of this dress,
I must admit your dress was absolutely sumptuous and resplendent, a very smart choice. But leaving your door unlocked and your dress unguarded was not a smart choice. I found this iron in the supply room; I ask that if you could please return it, I didn’t have time to do it myself after using it to burn your dress.
--Signed the saboteur
As Heather drops the note, typed liking with one of the computers in the designing room, Lindsay begins bawling again.
“It was so gorgeous,” Lindsay cries softly. “He even Chef Tomahawk would’ve looked nice in it.”
“It was beautiful, you out did yourself,” Bradley replies, holding her closer.
“Well this is interesting,” Chris replies. “Especially knowing what I know. But you should’ve been more careful Bulldogs. Remember that, now that you have last place in this part of the challenge.”
A few of the bulldogs groan.
“Everyone else get your dresses on,” the host states. “We have a fashion show to put on. Interns, if you’d clean the rooms up.”
Everyone left the room in a mass, distracted in their thoughts. No one seemed to notice the smirk someone wore for a few seconds.
Later, the teams, minus Gwen and Courtney, were seated in front of the stage, with Chris and Rhonda standing on the stage.
“Allow me to introduce you to our judges,” Chris states. “You all know Jenny, Toby and so of you may recognize our guest judge, American teen celebrity…Texas Alexis!”
Sitting at a judge’s table is Jenny, Toby and a teen girl with long, sparkly blonde hair and a white cowgirl’s hat.
“Howdy Y’all!” the cowgirl greets.
“Who is that poorly dressed woman?” Heather asks.
“I’m teen pop sensation Texas Alexis,” the cowgirl replies. “And I’m a huge fan of this show. I’ve been watching since the first season when was a nobdy in Texas, which is how I got my name.”
“Really?” Cody asks.
“Yup,” Texas Alexis replies. “See, my name is Alexis and I’m from Texas, so…”
“I meant about watching the first season,” Cody interrupts.
“Oh, yes sir,” Texas Alexis says. “I haven’t seen this new season here yet. Tell me, where’s Izzy? She’s my favorite!”
“She um…she’s passed on,” Rhonda replies.
“Oh dear,” the pop star replies. “Well shoot…”
“Texas Alexis is hosting a fashion show in India soon,” Chris states, trying to change the subject. “The winner of this part of the challenge will have their outfit be in that fashion show!”
Lindsay begins to erupt in tears again.
“Uh, so Texas Alexis,” Rhonda says. “Anything you wanna say to your fans?”
“Sure thing,” Texas Alexis replies. “Howdy to all my fans! Keep rockin!”
“Well,” Chris says. “That was very…”
“Also,” Texas Alexis interrupts. “To buy official Texas Alexis merchandise, including our Texas Alexis toilet seat, Texas Alexis spacesuit and Texas Alexis guide to Windows 8! And tune in this Wednesday to my Texas Alexis Live Reading of Batman: The Long Halloween at eight/seven central!”
“Okay…” Jenny says.
“And let me add,” Texas Alexis continues. “That those kinda sexy and explicit photos of me on the Internet are fakes! But they do model my new Texas Alexis Pajamas, at Wal-Mart now!”
“Are you done?” Toby asks.
“Nope,” Texas Alexis replies. “Buy tickets for European Concert tour this summer!”
“Gosh this show is a sellout,” Jenny states. “All right bring out one of the cows!”
First out on the runway, is Gwen, who does her best to strut like a model.
“Eh, kinda bland,” Texas Alexis states. “I wanted something in my fashion show that was pink. If I see a pink dress it will win for sure! I give this…a two.”
Lindsay’s cries from the background grow.
“Six,” Toby states.
“I’m not mainstream, so… I give it a nine!” Jenny shouts. “Next!”
Courtney then walks out of the runway, strutting and giving a well impression of a model.
“Oh, eggplant,” Texas Alexis. “It’s such a flattering color, and the green goes with it. I give it a ten!”
“Six,” Toby states.
“Why do you keep giving sixes?” Rhonda asks.
“When we had all three options I was gonna give three sixes,” Toby replies. “I’m too lazy to change my mind now.”
“Well I’m not mainstream, so…I give it a two!” Jenny shouts. “Team Indestructible wins!”
“Does it worry anyone else the crazy pop star is the only serious judge we can have?” Jovi asks.
“I think she called you crazy,” Texas Alexis whispers to Toby.
The scene changes to a parking lot, where the bus pulls up and the contestants exit.
“Now this next challenge is a race to the Taj Mahal,” Chris explains. “See, we were going to the Taj Mahal prissy pants.”
“Okay,” Courtney replies, surprisingly calm. “I’m just glad you knew the Taj Mahal was in India. I thought your ‘pwetty wittle head’ might’ve hurt itself trying to remember.”
“Anyway,” Rhonda continues. “Two preselected people from both teams, will each take a different pathway, all the same distance from the Taj Mahal. The catch is that the winners of the past challenge get to pick their team’s mode of transportation.”
Rhonda whistles, and the redheaded intern, drags out an elephant and a cart pulled by a mule. The awkward intern pulls up in a taxi.
“We’ll take the taxi,” Jovi states.
“All right,” Chris replies. “And Sierra, what will your team take?”
“The mule and the cart,” Sierra states.
“Nice,” Rhonda replies. “And Bulldogs you get the elephant. Now competing in this challenge is Nate and Rosamond, Bradley and Heather, and Nellie and Sierra. Any questions before we begin?”
“Have you found Julie and SG yet?” Sierra asks.
“Not yet,” Chris replies. “But we’re working on it. Now everyone get ready and the race can begin.”
Later, after the race began, Nellie and Sierra ride down their pathway in their mule drawn wagon.
“Do you think Julie’s okay?” Sierra asks.
“Probably,” Nellie replies. “She can handle herself. I’m starting to feel like we bring her up too much in conversation. …Sierra, can I ask you a question?”
“As long as it’s not about geometry,” the uber fan replies. “Geometry is awful.”
“Why would I…never mind that,” the depressed dame says. “I was wondering…do you think you could have feelings for Mikey?”
“I don’t know,” Sierra replies. “I mean I’ve never thought about dating another guy than Cody, but Mikey seems like a nice guy…and he was kind of cute.” Sierra replies. “And he was even short.”
“What does his height have to do with anything?” Nellie asks.
“Well I have a thing for short boys,” Sierra replies. “Not really sure why. I did have dreams about a taller guy along time ago. But that was when I going through puberty and my teen hormones were kicking in. And he was a hunky man made out of a brownie who you could eat and his body would grow back, delicious and chocolaty as ever.”
“I don’t how to react to that,” Nellie replies.
“It was a really weird dream,” Sierra continues. “We would be spending some romantic time together, going shopping, eating a romantic dinner, which was weird because he was made of food but eating food. Then we were making out in a hot fudge hot tub. I was biting him a lot before we left to go to my room. I can’t remember why we went to my room, but the last thing I remember is that I muttered ‘I like my brownies with nuts.’ Whatever that means.”
"Thanks for sharing,” Nellie replies emotionlessly.
“It kind of reminds me of this other dream I had,” the uber fan states. “I was a milk maid but was in a French maid costume, and had finished milking some cows. A cat boy Cody came up wanting milk, but I didn’t have anymore from the cows, so I had to give him milk from my…”
“Please stop,” Nellie states. “Your stories are creeping me out. And we are on TV for the world to hear.”
“What?” Sierra asks. “I just got milk from some goats.”
Suddenly the mule brays and the carriage halts to a stop.
“What’s wrong Princess Tinfoil,” Sierra states.
“Princess Tinfoil?” Nellie asks.
“I have a condition where all animals I make a good contact with I have to nickname,” Sierra replies. “It’s from playing too many Pokémon games.”
“It looks like we’re at a cow crossing,” Nellie states.
Nellie is shown to be correct as a mother cow, and a seemingly never-ending row of calves cross the road.
“Oh, how cute,” Sierra states. “Well know we have to stop. Can’t injure the cuties.”
“Who cares,” Nellie says. “Cows live for only about fifteen years. And that’s being generous. Most are sent to slaughterhouses when they can’t produce milk, which is usually run up by the farmers due to excessive milking. Or if a cow simply injures itself, they’ll likely be sent to a slaughterhouse.
"After being killed for meat, most cows will be made into burgers with processed chemicals in the back of a fast food joint. Some cows of course grow up in slaughterhouses, having their toes grow into the wires. Which we digest, adding pounds that can cause heart attacks or feel fat about eating and gain eating disorders.”
“And my stories are creepy?” Sierra retorts.
"My stories aren’t about eating a giant brownie man’s almonds,” Nellie replies.
“Touché,” the uber fan admits.
Meanwhile, Julie and SG were still trapped in the sauna. The heat had become unbearable, and SG lay in the floor, dripping with sweat. Still, the two didn’t speak for along time…
“Since we might die,” SG states, finally ending the silence. “Would you let me do one thing before I kick the bucket?”
“We aren’t going to die,” Julie replies. “And…what?”
“That apology,” SG replies. “The one I tried to tell you at the pool. That why, I can die knowing you had a proper apology.”
“We aren’t going to die,” Julie restates. “And I guess so…not like I have plans.”
“Thank you,” the feverish lad states. “Well…I am deeply sorry for the pain I caused over something so stupid. You were a good friend, and a friend when I really needed one. Gwen was my idol when I first watched the show, but idol worship is blinding.
“Last time I said you were crazy, but I didn’t mean it in a bad way. You’re unpredictable, but that’s what’s great about you. You’re fun and you really live, that’s more than I can say about myself. I guess that’s why I thought it was weird you liked me.
“I voted you off, not because I didn’t like you, but because I couldn’t get how someone like you, could have feelings for me. I guess believing you were using me was more believable than you liking me. I have some low self-esteem issues I guess. Comes with being a nerd.
The worst part is how I saw you, hurting and I realized…I had feelings for you I think. And now I only remember about when you did love me. …I’m also sorry you had to listen to me say those stupid things before I die.”
“We aren’t going to die,” Julie replies. “And…thank you, that was nice and pretty mature for you to admit how wrong you were. And…I…I still kind of, maybe, love you…”
Julie glances at SG, and sees SG limp in the floor, with his eyes closed.
“SG?” Julie asks. “SG? SG, answer me please!”
Jumping on the boy, she puts her head down to his chest. …There’s no heartbeat. Julie pumps on his chest repeatedly, trying not to freak out, and failing.
Not thinking, Julie bends down and proceeds to give the kiss of life, hoping to get air flowing. Julie tries another attempt at mouth to mouth, and pumps his chest repeatedly.
“SG!” Julie yells, pressing upon his chest. “Hang in there SG, don’t give up on me you here! Don’t you give up on me! It’s not your time yet. You have the spirit of fighter somewhere, no fight, fight!”
Laying her head down again, Julie hears heartbeats, and sighs. “Thank goodness.”
Soon she hears muttered breaths from the technopath, but he still remains unconscious. Still worried, Julie tries to think of ways to help.
“It might be awkward,” Julie thought. “But I’m sure he’d preferred to be stripped than dead.”
Reluctantly, Julie undoes SG’s belt. Just as she holds up the belt, the sauna shuts off.
“Huh?” the loony says.
Suddenly, the door opens and the little Indian women enters the sauna. Seeing Julie bent over SG’s body and holding his belt, she begins swearing in Indian vigorously.
"Thank goodness you’re here,” Julie says. “He’s injured, and almost dead.”
“What?” the Indian woman says panicking. “What are you doing then, granting him his last wish?”
“What?” Julie asks. “Oh, oh. No, he had a heat stroke. And you speak English?”
“Of course,” the woman replies. “I work in a sauna built by an American business. I even grew up in Portland. I just speak in a foreign language so I can swear without people understanding. Now hurry, let’s revive the boy before I can get sued.”
A little bit later, Bradley and Heather are riding the elephant somewhat slowly down the road.
“Can this thing go any faster?” Bradley asks.
“Well looks like a boring, predictable challenge,” Heather states. “Courtesy of Chris and what’s her face. We might as well figure out whom we’re going to vote off, like it’s any contest.”
“I’m not so sure,” Bradley states.
“What?” the mean queen asks.
“I know you want Barbie gone,” the jock replies. “And I want her gone too. But I’m not sure if we should. She’s planning something, and I...”
“So what?” Heather asks. “She can’t do anything, no matter what she claims.”
“I’d like to believe that,” Bradley replies. “But I want to make sure she’s powerless. We need to weaken her before we finish her off. I fear if we go straight for her, we might be falling for a trap. We might still vote for her, but we need to play it safe here.
“Besides, Barbie’s so revenge crazy, she’s actually participating in challenges. If we get rid of her, the shaggy dog won’t try in challenges, no having no hope. William Taft still might. And the more elimination ceremonies we can avoid till merge the stronger will be.”
“You know I remember when we ran the alliance,” Heather states. “But now you make all the choices.”
“Heather, you’re almost as obsessed with revenge as Barbie,” Bradley replies. “You’re blinded by it, you’re not looking at it from all the angles. But you need to.”
“Thanks mom,” Heather retorts. She turns away from her partner.
“Maybe I wouldn’t have to reprimand you if you’d act mature,” Bradley states growing angry.
Heather turns around to yell at the quarterback, but before she can speak, something flies up on her nose.
“Ack,” the queen bee states. “What is this?”
“Remain calm,” Bradley says.
“Is it poisonous?” Heather asks softly.
Bradley looks closer at her nose and then laughs, sticking his finger out and letting the insect climb up on his finger.
“Relax,” Bradley replies. “It’s a harmless beetle. A golden tortoise beetle, to be precious.”
Heather looks at the little bug on the athlete’s finger, which looks like a tiny little jewel.
“They just like to be high up,” Bradley states.
“What’s it doing now?” Heather asks.
The beetle’s outer layers begin changing clear, revealing a red and black pattern on it’s back, like a ladybug.
“Its just changing colors,” Bradley replies. “It can do that.”
Bradley holds up his finger over a tree leaf, and the beetle scatters off onto it.
“Since when did you know so much about bugs?” Heather asks.
Bradley, turns around startled, and blushes. “Well, I use to know about them a lot, when I was younger…”
Instead of giving him a look like Bradley expected, Heather chuckles. “You’ve got a soft side huh?”
“I guess,” Bradley states. “Why’s that funny?”
“I don’t know,” Heather replies. “I guess, sometimes you act like a lot of guys on this show have been, Duncan, Justin, Alejandro; big macho men, probably compensating for something. But that’s not you. You have a much smarter side, and a much more genuine side. You can still be intimidating and strategic, but you don’t feel like a seducer. I guess I like that.”
“Well you know there’s more to you than an angry, popular girl,” Bradley states. “You’re smart, and can be pretty funny too.”
“I’m glad I humor you,” Heather replies dryly. “…What’s going on with you and Lindsay? You’ve been spending an awful lot amount of time with her.”
“Nothing,” Bradley replies somewhat hesitant. “She was upset, and I’ve been comforting her. Why, you aren’t jealous are you?”
“Of course not,” Heather thought. But instead she said, “Maybe, a little bit.”
“Don’t be,” Bradley replies grabbing her hand.
The two, both somewhat blushing, stare in each others eyes, and slowly, lean a bit closer. And then closer, and then closer and then…
The elephant stands and it’s back legs trumpeting, and drops the two off its back and into a puddle of mud. The elephant storms off at a rather fast pace.
“Now it goes fast,” Bradley grumbles, standing up.
“I hate this show so much,” Heather says as Bradley helps her up.
Meanwhile, Nellie and Sierra are still waiting at the cow crossing, Sierra writing in a journal.
“What are you doing?” Nellie asks.
“Writing my will in case we never make it out of here,” Sierra replies. “I’ve gotten pretty far. Wanna hear an excerpt?”
“I guess,” Nellie replies.
Clearing her throat Sierra reads, “Thank you all for gather to my will reading. I cannot be here in person as I have died.
To my dearest mother I leave my entire collection of Boy’s Love manga. I know you’ll enjoy more than I did. I’m also sorry I couldn’t finish that submission you paid for on Devintart, though I’m kinda glad I didn’t finish it, because your NoCo obsession is really creepy.
To my father I leave all of my collectable My Little Pony figurines and my One Rejection albums. I know you liked the Backalley Boys as a boy band better, but I think you’ll appreciate these.”
“I don’t even understand what half of that means,” Nellie replies.
“Yeah, it’s not really you,” Sierra states. “I haven’t gotten to you yet, but I’m not sure what of mine you’ll want.”
“I don’t care,” Nellie replies. “Just give me something you don’t know what to do with.”
“No way!” Sierra replies. “I have to give you something meaningful, from the bottom of my heart. I’ll have to come back to that part…”
“Look,” Nellie says. “The cows have finally finished moving.”
“Hooray!” Sierra cheers. She shakes the reins and the donkey trots on.
Later, Rosamond and Nate are traveling in their taxi driven by the awkward intern, Cinnamon. The two had been chatting for a while.
“So Nate do you like Jovi?” Rosamond asks in the middle of their conversation.
Yeah she’s great,” Nate replies. “I wouldn’t date her or anything though.”
“Yeah,” Rosamond says, half-heartily laughing.
“Rosamond,” Nate says, suddenly nervous. “…I saw the magazine Bridgette has, and I…”
“I don’t wanna talk about it,” Rosamond replies curtly.
“Well,” Nate goes on. “Jovi’s your friend and it’s not that big a deal…”
“Drop it,” Rosamond states coldly. “Please.”
“…Okay,” Nate replies quietly.
“…Okay originates from the abbreviation of orl korrect,” Cinnamon states. “A humorous form of all correct, popularized as a slogan of President Van Buren’s reelection campaign of 1840.”
“…Um, thanks for sharing that interesting fact,” Rosamond replies.
“Do you know how many more minutes till we get there?” Nate asks.
“…None,” Cinnamon replies emotionlessly, stopping the car. “We’re here.”
The two look out the window and see the Taj Mahal in front of them. They exit the taxi.
“Oh,” Rosamond says. “Thank you very much.”
"Of course,” Cinnamon replies, driving off.
Rosamond and Nate walk up to the Taj Mahal and find the hosts and non competing contestants. Julie and SG are back, and Chris has a black eye.
“Oh thank goodness you two are okay,” Rosamond says to Julie and SG. “What happened?”
“We got trapped in the sauna,” SG replies. “We almost died of a heat stroke. I can’t honestly remember what happened in there.”
“At least you’re okay now,” Rosamond states.
“Well with Rosamond and Nate here, it means Team Indestructible wins!” Chris narrates.
Team Indestructible cheers.
“Oh Chris,” Rosamond says. “What’s happened to your eye?”
“I punched him in the face for getting us trapped and almost letting us die,” Julie says. “Don’t underestimate my right hook.”
The contestants wait for a bit before, and Sierra and Nellie pull up in their cart.
“Looks like The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice are safe from elimination! Man that team name never gets easy to say.”
“Where’s Bradley?” Lindsay asks.
“Don’t know,” Chris replies. “But till he and Heather show up we’re waiting here.”
Sierra and Nellie run up and excitedly reunite with their missing teammates. Julie separated them from the group, and informed the two of what happened to her and SG, though she failed to mention the detail of admitting she may still like SG. And stripping him.
“Talk about intense,” Sierra states.
“Enough about me,” Julie says. “How are you?”
“I think that trip in the challenge was just what I needed,” Sierra states. “I feel better.”
“I’m glad to hear it,” Julie replies. “And with this whole Mikey thing, I can understand being shocked when someone finds you desirable, that happens to me, but don’t think that it’s wrong that someone does find you desirable, because you can’t love if you can’t believe you can be loved. …Am I making sense?”
“Absolutely,” Sierra replies. “And remember the same thing, okay?”
“Okay,” Julie replies chuckling a little.
Soon, Pepper, the redheaded intern shows up with the elephant but not their riders. Not long after, Cinnamon, in her taxi drops off the mud covered pair of Bradley and Heather.
“What happened?” DJ asks.
“That stupid elephant threw us off it’s back and into the mud,” Heather states.
The elephant laughs at the two through it’s trunk.
“I wouldn’t mind making that thing into a handbag,” Heather complains.
Bradley laughs slighty. “I’ll help you, maybe put it’s head over my mantle.”
“Well the Bulldogs are the big losers today and will vote off one of their own,” Chris states.
“This was a really anti-climatic challenge,” Rhonda says.
“I don’t think the chapter’s focus was on the challenge,” Toby states.
“Duh!” Jenny shouts.
Later, Team Indestructible enjoyed their reward, while The Bulldogs would soon face elimination. Barbie and Cosmic River are shown talking alone.
“I was thinking we should both talk to Lindsay,” Cosmic River says. “Might give us a better chance.”
“Do you wanna talk to DJ with me?” Barbie asks.
Cosmic River shakes his head. “I don’t that’d be groovy, he’s probably…”
“Wait,” Barbie shushes.
In the silence they hear big footsteps.
“Cosmic River?” a voice calls out. “Buddy?”
“DJ!” Cosmic River shouts. “Back here man!”
DJ runs forward into the room and scoops of the longhaired hippie into a ginormous bear hug.
“Cosmic River,” DJ cries, shedding tears. “I’m so sorry! I was a fool! Can you ever forgive me? Please, speak to me!”
“You’re crushing me man,” Cosmic River replies.
“Oh, sorry,” DJ says letting go of Cosmic River.
“Of course I forgive you,” Cosmic River says.
“And allow me to apologize to you Barbie as well,” DJ says.
"Thank you,” Barbie replies. “But what made you change your mind?”
“I know it sounds silly,” DJ replies. “But it was Bradley and Heater joking about killing that elephant. Bradley pretended to be an animal lover, but he wasn’t. It could be a joke I guess, but it was just an eye opener to how evil he was. I wanna win this show for my mama, but I wanna make her proud to. And I can’t imagine she is with this kind of behavior.”
“I’m sure she would be now man,” Cosmic River states. “…So now what?”
“Now we need to get one more vote,” Barbie states.
“It’s hard to like right at you baby,” Lindsay sings, brushing her alone in the economy. “But here’s my number, so call me…MAYBE!”
Lindsay puts away the brush and her bag and turns around to go to elimination, but sees DJ, Cosmic River and Barbie standing there.
“Oh, hi Babs, hi PJ, hi Cameron,” Lindsay greets the three.
“Lindsay, can we talk?” DJ asks.
“Yes, you’re doing it right now,” Lindsay replies, turning her head in confusion.
“He’s means can we talk about something specific with you,” Barbie replies.
“Oh, sure,” Lindsay replies sitting down. “But after that we need to go to the elimination room, it’s almost time for elimination…”
“That’s what we wanted to talk about,” Barbie says. “We know you’re voting with Bradley, Heather and Chef. But we want you to vote with us, and vote off Bradley.”
“…I can’t,” Lindsay replies.
“Lindsay, she just said you’re voting with Heather and Chef,” DJ says. “Don’t you see how wrong this is?”
“Bradley’s my boyfriend,” Lindsay replies firmly.
“I don’t wanna sound rude,” Barbie states. “But don’t you see what he’s doing? He’s using you.”
“Lindsay you and me were teammates in World Tour,” DJ says. “The last of our team, so please listen to me. You remember how Heather used you in Total Drama Island by pretending to be your friend?”
“Well…yes, but I…”
“Bradley is doing the same by pretending to be your boyfriend,” DJ interrupts.
“I’m sorry cat,” Cosmic River says. “Bradley’s tricked all of us, so don’t feel bad.”
“He’s not tricking me,” Linsday states unsure.
“He doesn’t care for you,” Barbie states. “He’s using you, you’re a pawn to him and you mean nothing to him. Your relationship means nothing to him. It seems like he likes Heather. Try and understand, Bradley doesn’t love you.”
Lindsay looks down at the floor, and begins to shed a few tears.
“…I’m sorry,” Barbie states. “But do you understand…”
“Of course I do!” Lindsay suddenly shouts angrily. “I can see he’s using me. It’s obvious! He doesn’t love me…but, but he pretends to…and I need that. I need someone who pretends to like me for me.”
“Lindsay,” DJ tries to say.
“You don’t understand!” Lindsay shouts. “Just go!”
Lindsay runs off in tears.
“Now what do we do?” DJ asks.
“Hope,” Barbie replies. “And pray. Hope and pray Lindsay understands...
And they did. But it was to no avail.
“And the final barfbag goes to,” Chris narrates at the elimination ceremony. “...Bradley. Sorry, but it looks like you’re eliminated…
…DJ.”
DJ sighs and stands up.
“Nice try Barbie,” Bradley says. “But your plan to trick Lindsay failed, and she told us all about your little plan, and how DJ jumping ship.
“I’m not the one trying to trick Lindsay,” Barbie replies. “I was trying to help her.”
Ignoring the comment, Bradley turns his attention to DJ. “And you, you should’ve known better than try to betray us. You might’ve helped her get back home.”
“Now you’ve only brought her shame,” Chef says.
“That’s not true!” Cosmic River shouts.
“No one asked you dropout,” Heather replies curtly.
“Good luck Cosmic River,” DJ says, and then jumps out of the plane.
“I don’t understand,” Barbie says. “Why eliminate DJ and not me?”
“DJ needed to be face consciences for jumping ship,” Heather replies. “Besides, you didn’t expect us to vote off, and you need the element of surprise. And it’s a good thing too, or else we might have reunited the Bohemian beatnik brothers. Looks like you lose.”
“So you won a battle,” Barbie replies. “But you haven’t won the war.”
“And what makes you think you can?” Chef asks.
“That’s my secret,” Barbie replies.
“Let’s leave these losers,” Bradley states.
The four alliance members leave, with Lindsay avoiding eye contact with Cosmic River and Barbie.
“I feel like this is all building up to something,” Rhonda says.
“It is,” Chris replies. “How will this battle of alliances go in the Bulldogs? Will Julie and SG work out their feelings? What’s Rosamond hiding, and are her friendships going to get out of rocky water? Who is this saboteur? And what is the connection with R.O.T.I and the attack on us? These questions will be answered on another installment of…Total Drama What The Heck?”
Chapter 13 Melt The Ice
Chris and Rhonda are shown in the cockpit of the plate.
“Last time on Total Drama,” Chris narrates. “Tensions increased for the Bulldogs as Bradley spent more time with Lindsay, make Heather crazy jealous. Rosamond continued to feel isolated from Nate and Jovi while believing they had a secret relationship, and acted weird regarding a fashion magazine her friends were looking at.”
“Before we began are challenge,” Rhonda continues. “We had a talk about the recent attack on the show, by an evil mad scientist. The mad scientist was quoted as saying ‘R.O.T.I’, the name of the original failed fourth season that ended badly. No idea what that means though."
“Who does?” Chris asks. “Anyway, our challenge took us to India, where the team participated in a fashion show for teen pop star Texas Alexis. But troubled stirred as Julie and SG became separated in the hot springs, and the saboteur sabotaged Lindsay and her team’s dress.”
“This ultimately cost the Bulldogs the challenge,” Rhonda explains. “They lost the second part of the challenge. DJ realized the error of his ways and teamed up with Barbie and Cosmic River to boot out Bradley. But they couldn’t get Lindsay’s vote, and DJ got the boot.”
“What issues will arise for our contestants now?” Chris narrates. “Who will hook up and who will be the biggest loser today? Find out on Total Drama What The Heck?”
Rhonda suddenly stands up. “If you’ll excuse me, I have to go.”
“Why?” Chris asks.
“I’ve had with Chef constantly putting me down,” Rhonda replies. “He challenged me to a cook-off and I’m going to put that geriatric cook in his place by beating him today!”
“K, didn’t ask for your life story,” Chris replies. “Please, leave.”
[theme song plays]
Later in the day, around lunchtime, the cook-off commenced. Both Chef Hatchet and Rhonda made the same dishes, lasagna. The contestants were given both lasagnas, but to keep things fair, no one knew which lasagna was whose. Both had worked in separate spaces, and with the interns Pepper and Cinnamon watching, made sure there was no tampering with.
The contestants were eating the lasagna, and found both were good.
Cosmic River and Barbie sat at a table alone, both picking at their food.
“…I’m sorry,” Barbie speaks up.
“Huh?” Cosmic River asks. “…It’s not your fault.”
“I could have changed that,” Barbie replies. “Maybe I could’ve convinced Lindsay to betray Heather, and weaken him.”
“We already discussed this before talking to Lindsay man,” the hippie replies. “We thought we’d try to help Lindsay and get to see past all this bologna. And she’s so wrapped around Bradley’s finger she would go to him about Heather and he’d whisper more sweet nothings into her ear.
If we were going to do something, we had to go big or go home. You said so yourself.”
“Yes,” Barbie replies. “But I thought I’d be going home. If it was I could…I mean I guess I could’ve still...I mean…”
The hippie gives a slightly forced chuckle. “I’m really okay cool cat, he’s not gone forever and we made up. And people leave ya, that’s a fact of life. I’ve learned that before and dealt with it. It’s nothing new.”
“…Doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt,” Barbie states. She cautiously, almost alien like in way, places her hand on his shoulder.
The hippie looks up and gives a soft smile.
Meanwhile at a table at the other end of the room, the other Bulldogs sat. With Chef busy, that left Bradley alone with his Betty and Veronica, Lindsay on the left of him and Heather on the right.
“…And so that’s what happened at theater camp,” Lindsay recounts.
“Sounds crazy,” Bradley replies.
“That’s a nice way of saying boring,” Heather mumbles. “If you excuse us the grown ups have to go talk strategy.”
"Oh good,” Lindsay replies. “Me and Bradley wanted to talk alone. If you wouldn’t mind leaving Heather, there are exits to your right and left. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out, okay?”
“Haha, oh you were cute for once Lindsay,” Heather chuckles. “Guess there is a first time for everything.”
“Oh by the way Heather,” Lindsay asks. “I was trying to do something new with my hair, and I thought I’d try one of your looks. Now, how high do I have to kick the razor to be horribly disfigured on national TV?”
“If you wanted to do something new with your hair you could try hiding your roots for a change,” Heather replies. “Maybe your boyfriend would like it, what’s him name? Oh Tyler, right, I heard you guys broke up. Something about him wanting a smarter girl…”
“I’m about to rip out those ugly hair extensions,” Lindsay states standing up.
Bring it twit, maybe one of your boob jobs will rupture,” Heather replies.
“Woah, let’s calm down,” Bradley replies. “I’m still eating this lasagna actually. I’m going to go get some more…”
“Oh, have some of mine Bradley,” Lindsay offers.
“Be careful, you might catch her stupid,” Heather states.
“Maybe he’ll catch your pointy chin and poor fashion sense if he keeps being around you,” Lindsay states.
Bradley is shown in the confessional. “Wow, those girls are really going at it. I’ve never had two girls fight over me before…I mean well of course I’ve had tons of girls fawn over me naturally. It’s just never been this catty or with women quite so…pretty…I mean no...of course pretty girls fight over me, I just meant..."
At Team Indestructible’s table, it was rather quiet.
Courtney is shown in the confessional. “Since the saboteur has sabotaged both other teams, everyone’s starting to suspect it’s us. And it’s dropped our team moral. Jovi’s already made a speech about it, and how she doesn’t suspect anyone on this team is the saboteur. But I don’t think the others feel the same way.”
Jovi is shown using one of the laptops the show offers the winners, searching frantically.
“Hmm,” Jovi says to herself.
“What are you doing?” Bridgette asks. Her leg is shown to be in fine, working condition, the cast having been removed.
“Huh?” Jovi asks looking up. “…Nothing.”
Bridgette raises an eyebrow.
“Okay,” Jovi whispers. “You remember how that magazine made Rosamond flip out? I’m investigating it.”
“I remember that,” Bridgette replies. “But I also remember Nate saying not to, and if we wanted to respect Rosamond we should leave it alone.”
Jovi shakes her head. “Nate may think he’s right, but I believe he’s mistaken. Once I know what the issue is I can try to resolve it.”
“What makes you so sure you can resolve it?” Bridgette asks.
“I’m pretty astute if I say so myself,” Jovi replies. “I mean, have I ever led this team wrong Bridgette?”
“What about with Taylor,” the surfer replies.
“That was different,” Jovi states. “That was challenge related, this is not. And in the end didn’t I make a decision that worked for everyone?”
“What are you going to do?” Bridgette asks.
“Well once I figure out what it is I’ll have a clearer idea,” Jovi replies. “But I’ll converse about it with Rosamond rationally. We’re best friends, she’ll heed what I say.”
“I hope you’re right,” Bridgette replies. “…Where is Rosamond?”
“She’s chatting with SG,” Jovi replies.
“She’s been doing that a lot,” the surfer recalls.
“Because she has been avoiding us,” the captain states. “She’s feeling uncomfortable here and I think it has to do with that magazine for whatever reason. And to resolve a problem you need to know what it is. And I’m concerned if we don’t resolve the problem…she’ll become more distant.”
“I know you’re doing this because you care,” Bridgette replies. “I just want you to be careful. You need companionship to survive in general. Especially here. Friendship is something I needed to get me through the first season and didn’t really have my last two, and look how that turned out.”
“If you know you need it why didn’t you try and have it?” Jovi asks.
“I didn’t know then,” Bridgette replies. “…But being here, I’ve learned now.”
“Former players often use their past experiences to fashion new strategies to last longer on reality shows,” Jovi states.
“I’m usually trying to forget my past experiences with this show,” Bridgette states. “Jovi remember this, reality shows like this are designed to bring the worst out of people. Don’t let it.”
At the same time, Rosamond and SG are sitting and talking together.
“How are you enjoying the lasagna?” Rosamond asks.
“…It’s great,” SG replies. He picks at and moves his food around.
“Still upset over how thinks are on your team?” Rosamond inquires.
“Yeah,” SG replies.
“At least you tried,” Rosamond replies. “You apologized and admitted you did wrong, that’s the mature thing to do. I do wish Julie would have heard your full apology.”
SG sighs. “Well…”
“Wait…she did?” the goth asks.
“Kind of,” SG replies. “…Do you remember how she and I were trapped in the sauna together? …I said I couldn’t remember anything, but I could.
“What happened?” Rosamond whispers.
SG recaps the events of the sauna. But I don’t have to restate them cause you already read them, right?
“…And that is what happened,” SG finishes.
“So she admitted her feelings for you?” Rosamond asks. “So…why aren’t you two together?”
“Even if she has feelings I don’t think she would accept me,” SG states. “Not that I blame her.”
"You’re never going to be happy if you don’t believe in yourself SG,” Rosamond states. “If you want Julie to accept you, you have to show her you won’t make the same mistake twice. You need to show her you’ve changed not only for her, but also for yourself. …I have something that might help!”
Rosamond reaches into her pocket and pulls out one of her troll dolls dressed like SG.
“Here,” Rosamond says giving SG the doll. “I make these little troll dolls and I thought you should have one!”
“Oh,” SG says. “It’s really uh…”
“It’s a little ugly,” Rosamond replies. “But cute too. Cugly, I like to say. But it will help you! I’ve been making these things since I was little, as far back as I can remember. It’s said they’ll protect you and care for you when you need it most. Even when you’re all alone. …Maybe it can help you.”
SG smiles. “Thanks Rosamond, you always know what to say. I’ll try…”
Meanwhile, Julie, Sierra and Nellie are sitting alone at a table. Julie has just finished recapping the events of the steam room.
“Wow,” Sierra states. “So just to be clear, you and SG didn’t…”
“No!” Julie quickly interrupts.
“So do you love him?” Nellie asks.
"Well, I want to,” Julie says. “I think. But I don’t want to get hurt again. How can I trust he won’t?”
“Well you can’t know he won’t hurt you for one hundred percent,” Nellie states.
"That’s not the thing to say,” Sierra states.
“It’s the honest thing,” Nellie says. “But isn’t that what trust means?”
Julie shrugs heavily.
“Do you still want revenge?” Nellie asks.
“I don’t know what I want,” Julie replies.
“I think you need to figure that out,” Nellie replies.
Julie looks down at her lasagna. “Hmm…my cousin Dolph makes good lasagna. HE rides a magic, flying, poptart rainbow cat, the Nyan Cat. Lasagna making runs in my family actually, from my great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather Mario, according to my twice removed cousin’s sister’s cousin’s uncle’s niece Staci, a professional family historian… ”
“Julie, you’re trying to change the subject,” Nellie interrupts.
Julie sighs."You're right."
Pepper walks up the Fun Bunch. “Um… Hi Julie.”
“Hi Pepper,” Julie replies. “How’s it going?”
“Fine,” Pepper replies. “Do you or your friends want anymore lasagna?”
“No, we’re good,” Sierra replies. “Both lasagnas are pretty good.”
“Well if you need anything let me know,” Pepper replies.
“What I need is a psychic,” Julie says glumly.
Pepper faces squint, her eyes spazzing out. She begins taking deep breaths.
“Are you okay?” Sierra asks.
“The lasagna,” Pepper states, talking like an old lady. Having calmed down, the redheaded intern picks up Julie’s plate.
“What?” Nellie asks.
“I see something in the lasagna,” Pepper states.
“I think that one has oregano…” Sierra replies.
“No lamb,” Pepper says. “I see…the future I do. Your future.”
“Whose?” Sierra asks.
“Everyone’s futures at the moment,” Pepper states, circling her hand around the entire room.
“What do you see?” Julie asks.
“Hmm…” Pepper says. “I see a liar. Someone claiming to be something they aren’t.”
“Is it the saboteur?” Julie asks.
“Very foolish,” Pepper replies. “Some of you trust the liar, let your guard down you do. The results of this aren’t clear, but I see…tears. And…reunions.”
“Reunions?” Nellie asks.
“Yes, unhappy reunions on your part,” Pepper states. “Like the reunion you will have today Julie!”
“Huh?” Julie asks. “Wait, go back to the liar. Who is the liar?”
“The vision has changed,” Pepper replies sternly. “But the trouble doesn’t look like it has. You may have two reunions today. One that is rather unpleasant. And one that’s been foreshadowed poorly. One is bad, and the other…It has changed.”
“What has?” Julie asks.
“The vision!” Pepper replies, her face becoming pale. “Oh dear, oh no, no, no.”
“What?” Sierra asks. “What is…”
“Beware!” Pepper interrupts. “Beware the beaver limo! BEWARE!”
“The what?” Nellie asks.
“THE BEAVER LIMO!” Pepper replies.
“Has she lost it or is she always like this?” Nellie asks.
“Depends,” Julie replies.
“Heed my words Julie,” Pepper prophesies. “If you do not find assurance and melt the ice at the center, you…will…DIE TODAY! ALL OF YOU WILL DIE!”
The contestants are turn to see Pepper spazzing out, who shouts, “There is the apparition lost at sea! She is at the center of this all. The loony bat!”
“Whose lost at sea?” Sierra asks. “Are you trying to be vague?” “But most importantly,” Pepper says. “Beware her!”
“Who are you talking about?” Julie asks.
“Her,” Pepper says. “Duck when you say adios because she may be there. For you see, she is actually…”
Cinnamon snaps her fingers in front of Pepper’s face. Pepper blinks, and looks at everyone staring at her, as Cinnamon whispers in her ears.
“-Oh,” Pepper says meekly. “It seems there’s other business I must attend to. Sorry to bother you.”
“Wait,” Julie says. “Who is…”
“Goodbye,” Pepper replies, rushing away.
“Does she always act like that?” Courtney asks.
“Depends,” Bridgette replies.
Sometime after that, things eventually went back to the way there were. Eventually lunch was over, and the votes on the best lasagna were totaled. Jenny and Toby, reading the results, gathered everyone around the two chefs.
“Well,” Jenny says. “We’ve tallied the votes, and the consensus is lasagna number two. And lasagna number two was cooked by…
“Stop pausing for dramatic effect,” Toby states. “It’s not like it’s an elimination.”
“YOUR MOM!” Jenny shouts. “Now, lasagna number two was cooked by…Chef Hatchet!”
“What?” Rhonda asks.
“Hahahaha!” Chef laughs. “In your face fathead! You suck! Hahahahahahahaha!”
Rhonda looks down at the floor in shame.
Suddenly a phone beeps. Jenny pulls her cell out of her pocket, and opens a text.
“Oh crap,” Jenny says.
“What?” Toby says.
“Oh just a giant emergency,” Jenny yells. “We’ve got to tell Chris. The show is in danger…”
Later, the contestants are gathered in the elimination room. Facing them is Chris, Jenny and Toby.
“What’s going on?” Heather asks.
“Well an issue has been brought to are attention,” Chris replies.
“Where’s Rhonda?” Sierra asks.
“She’s flying the plane,” Chris replies.
“Probably crying like a baby that I beat her,” Chef brags.
“No she isn’t,” Toby says.
“Yes she is,” Jenny replies. “She got snot all over your shoulder and was blubbering more than a whale and it’s blubber.”
“Can we get on with this?” Heather says.
“Well Jenny has received a text revealing that someone gave us a bad review,” Chris states. “That someone being Dustine Believer.”
“Who?” Chef asks.
“A teen singer,” SG explains. “He’s got a really squeaky voice and his songs are all about getting girls and stuff. He’s pretty lame, no one really likes him.”
“Well girls in our age demographic like him,” Chris replies. “Apparently, Dustine Believer had an interview before he left for a reality show being filmed in Antarctica.”
“Antarctica?” Jovi asks. “Why there? And what is this show?”
“No idea on why,” Toby says. “It’s a pretty weird show, no one has really heard about it till recently, no idea who is producing it either. But all the people behind say “it’s the best teen reality show ever,” and that “it puts Total Drama to shame.”
“Dustine Believer criticized our show, particularly this season,” Jenny states. “And word is it’s causing our ratings to drop. Fast.”
“Why are you telling us this?” Courtney asks.
“Simple,” Chris replies. “If they want to start a fight with Total Drama then we’ll give them a fight. We’re going to Antarctica right now, where the challenge will be to ambush their show. We’ll humiliate them on our show before they even air, ruining them. Heh, heh, heh…”
“And we’ll get that false idol to change his mind about our show on TV for everyone to see,” Jenny says gleefully.
“Great another challenge in the freezing cold,” Courtney whines.
“Well for once we have good news,” Chris states. “Remember those jackets from the Yukon I mentioned in World Tour? We’ll they finally arrived yesterday!”
Chris whistles, and Pepper and Cinnamon push out a crate of winter clothing, along with snowmobiles.
“And as you can see,” Chris says. “We have snow mobiles. Since the jackets arrived even later than the six-to-eight weeks they were suppose to, we got fifteen, free snowmobiles in return!”
“Talk about convenient,” Courtney says.
“Now everyone suit up!” Chris states.
A little bit later, everyone has suited up.
“Wow these are comfy,” Julie says. “It’s like a polar bear’s bosom up in here!”
“How long till we get to Antarctica?” Cody asks.
“We should actually be flying over it right now,” Chris replies. “Now when we get there we…”
“Wait,” Barbie interrupts. “Does anyone else here that noise?”
“It’s probably a whale trying to use a mating call on you,” Heather replies.
“It sounds like a boom,” Barbie says. “Is there…”
BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
“Isn’t that the alarm for when the plane is about to crash into another flying object?” Lindsay asks nervously.
“Yeah,” Chris replies. “But Rhonda’s flying so…”
BOOM!
“That sounds like it came from the back of the plane,” Barbie says.
Rosamond looks out the window close to her. Outside she sees a black plane. On the side of it is four bold, red letters; R, O, T, I.
“Someone out there is firing on us!” Rosamond screams.
BOOM!
Another explosion happens and the plane starts to sharply decrease in altitude. The contestants grab on to anything near them as they are jerked forward.
As the dying jet sinks out of the sky, Rosamond sees the front of the black plane.
Rosamond violently shakes, as her eyes grow wide. “Is that…no it can’t be…”
Before she can get another look, a drift of snow obscures the plane, and it disappears.
“I suggest we all go to the economy section,” Courtney says. “It’s far from the head and the back of the plane, and has seat belts."
The contestants and staff rush to the economy section, and buckle up into the seats.
Chris pulls out a walky talky. “Rhonda, what is going on?”
“I don’t know,” Rhonda replies. “Something, I think it was a missile, hit us in the tail of the plane. We’re going down, but don’t worry I’m going toland this thing. But I warn you know, it will be rocking…”
Nate turns to Rosamond.
“Rosamond, we might die now,” Nate says. “So before we go I want to tell you something. I just want you to know…Rosamond look at me.”
Rosamond has her faced tucked into her cats, buckled up alongside her. She refuses to look up.
Nate sighs. “Rosamond, you’re so important to me and I…”
Keeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee….
The contestants grab their ears as the plane screeches, sliding across the icy surface of the continent. It halts to a stop in a mound of snow. The contestants cheer and sigh breathes of relief.
Never Say Never...
Not long after, the staff and the contestants meet again back in the elimination room.
“So the bad news is some plane fired missiles at us and escaped,” Chris states. “The good news is we are near people, and Rhonda, Jenny, Toby and I will go there via snowmobile to get help. And even more good news, we’re near the area where Dustine Believer is.”
“So you’re going to send us there as part of a challenge?” Courtney guesses.
“Isn’t it great when you know someone so well,” Chris replies. “Each team will take three snowmobiles and race off to the camp where the rival reality show is. You should be able to see before you arrive, just head west.
“We’ve already sent cameramen to set up cameras all over to record you, and we’ll review the recorded footage and decide which team did a better job at humiliating the show and Dustine. Pepper and Cinnamon will tell you when to go.”
Chris, Rhonda and Jenny and Toby took off on three snowmobiles [Jenny and Toby shared one] and went east.
The contestants paired themselves off; Jovi and Rosamond, Julie and Sierra, Bradley and Chef, Lindsay and Heather, Nate and Trent, SG and Nellie, Gwen and Cody, Barbie and Cosmic River, and Bridgette and Courtney.
“Uh…g…go,” Pepper said meekly.
The contestants sped off, the team leaders driving their snowmobiles in front and their teammates following behind. Though they all headed west, a fierce snowstorm was waging, and the three teams soon went their separate ways.
Pepper and Cinnamon stand there and watch, until the contestants can’t be seen anymore.
“Do…you think they’ll be okay?” Pepper asks.
“Yes,” Cinnamon replies.
“I hope so,” Pepper replies, sighing in relief. “But I guess we’ve got to worry about taking care of things here. I guess we’re in charge though huh now that Chris and them are off? I wonder who’d fire missiles at us anyway?”
“Probably R.O.T.I.,” Cinnamon replies. “Hehehehehehehehehehehe…”
“Was that you Cinnamon?” Pepper asks.
“No,” Cinnamon replies.
“HeHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHeHe…”
“Okay who is laughing dementedly?” Pepper asks. “Oh no…I told you this place was haunted. What if it’s former interns? What if they upset because resting place has been disturbed?”
“No,” Cinnamon coldly states. “It sounds like it’s a little gir…”
“HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE!”
Suddenly a small, shadowy figure jumps out of the air vents and scurries forward like a mad hyena. It charges towards the interns, approaching quickly.
Pepper jumps into Cinnamon’s arms, screaming. “Ah! Ah! Ah! WHAT IS THAT! Ah! Ah! WE’RE GOING TO DIE! DIE AND GO DOWN BELOW! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!”
The thing leaps forward to the interns, cackling and rolling it’s eyes into the back of it’s head...
…Cinnamon emotionlessly kicks it in its fat head.
The thing lands on the floor. It coils its head at the interns and laughs. Then suddenly stops. It looks towards the open door, out into the cold. The beast jumps onto a snowmobile, and starts it up.
“What’s it doing?” Pepper asks.
The thing turns abruptly turns it’s head around, and then smiles. It turns around and begins singing…
“Grab your backpacks let’s go! Jump in! Vamanos! You can lead the way!”
It then rushes out of the open door into the snow.
“Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! A…”
Cinnamon repeatedly slaps Pepper.
“Thanks,” Pepper replies. “But what was that?”
“A monster,” Cinnamon states.
“Wait, I remember,” Pepper recalls. “It’s going after the contestants. It’s going to kill them! Julie…Bridgette…Barbie…we have to save them. C…can we do that? I…I…Of course we can!”
“Let’s go,” Cinnamon states. She sits down and starts a snowmobile.
“Right,” Pepper states confidently. “We’ve watched everyone episode of Jackie Chan Adventures, we can face…that. It’s time for an adventure Cinnamon.” Pepper revs up the last snowmobile.
“I just hope they are all okay,” Pepper states.
Meanwhile, Team Indestructible continued on through the snow, though the weather seems to be getting worse.
“Are we still going west?” Courtney shouts.
“Yes, this is west,” Jovi replies.
“Are you positive?” The C.I.T. asks.
“As positive I’m the leader of this team,” Jovi boastfully teases. “And would you look at that, I am the leader.”
“You could’ve fooled me,” Courtney snarks.
“Here’s the game plan,” Jovi announces. “So we’ll go with mine. We’ll ambush from different sides, Rosamond and I will…”
“Does anyone else see that?” Nate asks, pointing backwards.
In the far off distance, the silhouette of a snowmobile can be seen.No other snowmobiles seem to be following it however.
Team Indestructible slows down slightly, but aren’t sure what they should do, asking each other, including their two alpha females, how aren’t sure what to do, but decide to keep moving.
The driver from the snowmobile is as silent as night. The only sound that they can hear is the snowmobile increasing it’s speeds, trying faster and faster to reach them.
Jovi calls out to the driver, but no reply is sent. Nervously, everyone tries calling out. The only answer is the echo of the lone snowmobile’s speed increasing.
“We should just go quicker,” Jovi states. “If they aren’t answering us, then we shouldn’-“
BANG! Everyone is silent. Bridgette, recalling it vividly, is the first to speak. She yells in a muffled whisper, “It’s a gun! Someone’s firing at us…”
Instinctively, all of Team Indestructible speeds up. But they’re too late.
A wicked laugh chimes out as bullets continue to drop onto the snow. The lone snowmobile has caught up, and it’s rider waves a shotgun aimlessly.
Luckily for Team Indestructible, their assailant is an awful shot. But they feel as though they could die of just fear. They look forward, not afraid to stare into it’s eyes.
Cautiously, Courtney has the strength to look into her mirror. She does a double take, and glances again.
“We’re being shot at…” Courtney tries to say. “By a little girl. No, I’m not joking. Or crazy.”
Her team, almost angrily stares back at her, but see she is correct.
On the snowmobile sits a little girl, maybe five or six. Her hair is choppily on her rather large head. She wears a pink shirt that has become faded and purple shorts. She appears to be of Hispanic origin. A torn, purple backpack is on her shoulders, a strap seeming to be missing.
Her brown eyes are wide, full of bloodlust. Underneath them like dark circles of sleep deprival. Her grin is like that of the Joker’s. Her fingernails are long and dirty. In fact, the whole child is dirty and slightly green. Yet her belly seems fat, like a satisfied pig. She wears red boots on her feet that seem a little redder in parts than others.
“Wait,” Jovi recalls. “That’s the girl SG and Julie met in the challenge in Mexico…”
“Hola! Soy Dora. Dora la Exploradora. Y te voy a matar! HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA!”
BANG!
The spawn fires it’s last bullet and shoots Jovi and Rosamond’s snowmobile. The snowmobile spins rapidly, as Jovi loses all control of it. It rams it’s snowmobile into theirs repeatedly. They begin to spiral out of control away from the others, trying to fight off the psychotic creature, who tries biting them. Their snowmobile begins sparking, as they drive onto thin ice.
“Rosamond!” Nate shouts.
“Jovi!” Courtney screams.
“Go on,” Jovi replies. “Get away! I’ll protect Rosamond, you go to the camp ahead, and find help!”
The team stops, but doesn’t make any sudden movements.
“GO!” Jovi shouts.
Reluctantly, the team goes, speeding off to find help.
“How valiant,” It states. “I’ll send them your body bag after I murder you! Teeheee. DIE B*****!”
Jovi tries to wrestle it away, but the thing shakes violently, slobbering on her. It bites Jovi’s hand, drawing blood. Rosamond pounces forward and digs her nails into the thing’s face, forcing it to recoil in pain. Rosamond grabs the wheel of the thing’s snowmobile and backs it out of their snowmobile.
Rosamond and Jovi crash into a snow bank, and are propelled out of their snowmobile and on to the hard ground. They try to stand up, but the creature drives in front of them and rams them back onto the thin ice.
“Looks like you’re trapped,” it states, turning its head like a curious puppy. “I don’t have any real reason to kill you, but I might as well. She wants you all dead anyway. Besides…it might be fun.”
“Stay back!” Jovi shouts hopelessly. She and Rosamond try to stand, but can’t stop slipping on the ice.
"Backpack, backpack, loaded up with things and knick knacks too!” the terror sings. “Anything you might need I’ve gotten inside for you! Like…a chainsaw!”
Out of her backpack she lifts a rusty chainsaw. Despite it’s wear, it was quite capable of doing a good job. Despite it’s small size, it towered over the girls, like Chernabog.
“Prepare to say goodbye.”
“Goodbye!”
Suddenly Pepper crash into the fiend, sending her and her snowmobile flying. Cinnamon pulls up in her snowmobile shortly after. It turns around and hisses at the saviors. But instead of flinching, Pepper replies with a cocky stare. She spits in the general direction of it.
“Hand me the shotgun Cinnamon,” Pepper states, glaring at it. “I’m about to put this animal out of it’s and our misery.”
The thing did not reply. In one quick movement it drove off into the distance.
“Run you little namby-pamby!” Pepper shouts.
The two interns rush to help Jovi and Rosamond up.
“What’s going on?” Rosamond asks.
“Apparently the child that helped SG and Julie in the challenge in Mexico is a deranged monster from heck,” Cinnamon replies. “And has been hiding in the plane’s air vents since we left.”
“The vents,” Jovi recalls. “That explains the words written in Spanish in there, and the cloth found in there.”
“And the occasional low whisper or death threat I hear in the vents,” the redhead states.
“You hear death threats and you weren’t worried?” Jovi asks.
“I just thought…maybe that…it was just something in my head maybe,” Pepper replies meekly.
“Jovi, your hand!” Rosamond replies. “It’s still bleeding out of your glove.”
“Tis merely a scratch,” Jovi replies.
Rosamond rolls her eyes.
“It looks pretty bad,” Pepper murmurs. “I mean the bleeding…it’s bloody…and blood. …You should take my snowmobile and go back to the plane for medical help; I’m not that good of a driver anyways, I mean I did just hit someone…I’ll hop onto Cinnamon’s and we’ll find her…hopefully.”
“I’m fine, really,” Jovi replies. “Besides, we can’t leave our team out there.”
“They’ll be fine,” Cinnamon states. “We’ll make sure.”
“Besides,” Rosamond adds. “They are capable people. Who rescued us in Jersey?”
“Yeah, I guess they did do that,” Jovi recalls. “But…”
“Jovi, um…I think I need to go back too,” Rosamond states. “I think I hurt myself after that fall. Please, can we go back?”
“Okay Rosamond,” Jovi replies. “We’ll go back. Cinnamon, Pepper, please hurry.”
Rosamond is shown in the confessional. “Truth is, physically I was feeling fine. But Jovi needed medical attention, whether she’ll admit it or not. So of course, she’ll gladly return if she isn’t the weak one…”
Meanwhile, The Bulldogs were having a perchance of good luck compared to last time. Barbie heard construction, and following the noise led them exactly to the camp. Lindsay was the first to spot it, off in the distance.
Now, they were almost at the gate of the camp. The Bulldogs park their snowmobiles behind some snow banks, and gaze at the entrance. It’s guarded by burly, buff, bitter bodyguards.
“You think you could handle those guys Chef?” Bradley whispers.
“Uh…shoo of course I can,” Chef states. “Those pansies don’t stand a chance against me, even if my hand was tied behind my back.”
“Or if he was in his favorite dress,” Barbie comments.
“He dresses better than you,” Heather states.
“At least I don’t dress up like I’m going to work the streets,” the chubby goth replies.
“Wait,” Lindsay whispers. “Look at that flag.”
The blonde points to a flag hanging high above the camp. It reads Remain On Television Indefinitely.
“What about the dang flag?” Chef asks.
“The initials…” Barbie realizes.
Lindsay nods. “Remain. On. Television. Indefinitely. R.O.T.I.”
“That’s not the only funky thing,” Cosmic River points out. “Look, at those people.”
Sitting all around the camp were actors reading scripts, drinking coffee and getting make-up done; to look like young teenagers.
“It’s all a fake,” Bradley states in shock.
“What do you think it means man?” the hippie asks.
“It means this show is connected to all the peculiar stuff that has happened,” Barbie states. “This was clearly made to hurt Total Drama, relating somehow to its failed fourth season.”
“Well it also works as a great trap,” a whiny voice states.
The Bulldogs turn around, only to be on the receiving end of knockout gas…
As this is going on, Julie’s team is trekking through the snow.
“Julie?” Sierra asks. “Julie? You okay, you seem lost in thought.”
“I was just thinking,” Julie replies. “Do you remember Pepper’s prophecy she made at lunch? What exactly did she say?”
“She said she saw we all trusted someone,” Sierra says. “But that person would lead to unhappy reunions.”
“Like one I would have today,” Julie recalls. “I would have two reunions. One bad, the other foreshadowed poorly.”
“And wasn’t there something about beavers driving a limo?” Sierra asks.
“I think,” Julie replies. “And then I have to melt the ice at the center or else…we all die.”
“But you have to find assurance to do that,” Sierra adds. “What ever that means. And wasn’t there something about the sea?”
“Yeah, something about something in the center of the sea or something like that,” Julie states. “And there was another part…but I can’t remember what.”
“It probably wasn’t important,” Sierra says. “Or extremely important.”
From the back, Cody calls out, “Do you see it yet?”
Julie and Sierra lean forward, squinting.
“I think so!” Julie shouts back as the team cheers. “Sierra, is everyone accounted for?”
Sierra turns around. “Yeah. Whoever is on the fourth snowmobile is lagging but they seem to be speeding up.”
“Wait…weren’t we only given three snowmobiles?” the odd duck recalls.
“Yeah,” Sierra replies. “Well…then who is gaining on us?”
SG, having noticed the same occurrence, was staring at the gaining snowmobile with Nellie.
“Who is it?” Nellie asks.
“…A little girl,” SG replies. “…with a machine gun?”
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Hahahaha!” Dora laughs as she waves the gun and rains lead down. The sound of the bullets cuts the air.
“What The Heck?” Julie asks turning around.
“Isn’t that the little girl who helped you in Mexico?” Sierra asks.
“I wouldn’t say she helped me as much contributed to my elimination,” Julie replies. “But yes. And she’s a pretty terrible shot.”
“You don’t seem too surprised,” Sierra points out.
“Eh,” Julie replies. “She’s not the first person to try to kill me after we run into each other later. And she didn’t come off as sane exactly. Not like me. Now take the wheel Sierra, I’m about to beat up a small child! And it’s probably not illegal!”
Sierra takes the wheel as Julie cartwheels to the back of their snowmobile; she then backflips on top of SG’s and Nellie’s snowmobile.
“Julie,” SG states. “That’s…”
“Yup,” Julie replies. “You surprised?”
“Well she didn’t seem that stable,” SG admits. “But I wasn’t expecting her to pull a machine gun on us. You aren’t planning to fight her…”
“Well I’m not planning on her killing us,” Julie states. “Besides, I haven’t forgotten how annoying she was. She must pay.”
“Julie,” Nellie begins. “You…”
“She. Must. Pay,” Julie states glaring at the little girl. “You all keep driving. I’ll catch up and we’ll win the challenge.”
“You aren’t going out there on your own!” SG shouts.
“Do you not think I can handle myself?” the purple powerhouse asks.
“Well, I think you…”
“You think right,” Julie states. Before anyone can say anything else, she flips over onto Cody and Gwen’s snowmobile.
“Hola Julie,” Dora greets.
The tiny terror holds up her gun, but in a quick movement Julie flips onto the front of Dora’s snowmobile and kicks the gun out of Dora’s hands.
“Hey Dora,” Julie welcomes. “Where’s your monkey Boots? I see you’re wearing his boots.”
“Boots is in my backpack,” Dora answers. “As new fur trimming. But I'd like you to say hello to my new friend… my motosierra!”
Dora suddenly pulls out a chainsaw and slams it on the top of her snowmobile. Julie leaps into the air as she does, and lands on the tip of the vehicle, casually balancing on one foot.
“So were you always this crazy or is this something that has happened recently?” Julie inquires as she dances and does other foot stuff onto top the motor vehicle, avoiding the monster’s swings.
“My parents left me to play in the jungle unsupervised,” Dora states. “I became crazy as I tried not to die in there! Once I finally found my way out I dealt with my parents, using the lessons the jungle had taught me. But some people didn’t like my lessons and tried to have me locked up. And that would have been the end of me if…”
Suddenly, Julie slams her knee into the back of Dora’s forehead. “That was for asking where obvious things were…”
Julie then bounces onto the chainsaw handle and kicks the creature right in its nose. “That was for singing “Where Are We Going?” every two minutes...”
As Dora grips her head in pain, Julie kicks the chainsaw out of her hands and punches Dora square in the gut! “And that was for ruining my moment with SG!”
Dora only chuckles. “Oh yes. I still see you and my other hated enemy haven’t hooked up. Who could blame him for not wanting a freak…”
Julie slams her face into the wheel of the snowmobile. “How would you know about SG and me?”
“I’ve been hiding on the plane,” the killer replies. “Watching and waiting for my master to give the signal to begin to kill you. And he has given it. And you and all your friends will die.”
Suddenly, the thing lunges forward with a knife and stabs it into Julie’s leg, promoting a cry from the purple girl.
“Farewell Julie,” Dora replies. “It was great catching up, teehee. Heehee…”
Like a shot, SG drives his snowmobile into Dora’s, startling the fiend.
“Julie, hop on!” SG states.
“I’m fine,” Julie replies.
“Stabbed by a knife into your leg is not fine,” SG replies.
“Well if it isn’t my other enemy,” Dora states. “Come to die with your ex SG?”
“Why do you want to kill us so bad?” SG asks.
“Because I was suppose to kill you back in the jungle!” Dora shouts. “But you got away alive!”
“Why didn’t you kill us?” the technophile asks.
“I forgot!” Dora angrily replies.
“You are the suckist villain ever,” SG replies. “You’re worse than the Condiment King. And he invented a gun just to fire honey mustard at people.”
Dora screams and jumps forward at SG. He spins his snowmobile and slams her back into the seat of her snowmobile.
“Wow, you really do suck,” Julie states.
The monster growls and swings her knife forward to stab Julie. Julie rolls off onto the back of SG’s snowmobile. The knife enters the inside of Dora’s snowmobile. The engine starts to spark and bursts into flames.
“Thanks for easily defeating yourself with your lack of self control,” Julie states.
“Like a sucky villain would!” SG adds. He speeds their snowmobile up intensely, and splashes snow onto Dora.
Dora tries to follow, but her snowmobile rapidly spins out of control as she does. She disappears into the distance.
“Thanks,” Julie states. “Where is Nellie?”
"With Sierra,” SG replies. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” the wacko says. “The bleeding’s stopped. I told you not to stay behind. I would have been fine.”
“You probably would have,” SG replies. “But back in Jersey you were really in danger. I just wanted to make sure you weren’t lost again.”
“Thanks,” Julie says again. “I guess we should focus on getting to Dustine Believer’s reality show.”
“Hopefully soon,” SG states. “Though we should proceed with extreme caution.”
“Why?” Julie asks.
“I overheard what Dora said to you as I was approaching you,” SG explains. “She said her master was waiting to send her, but did now. Why now though?”
“You don’t think…”
SG nods. “Something about this reality show is connected to Dora and whoever her ‘master’ is. And I have a suspicion that her boss is connected to the mad scientist and maybe R.O.T.I…”
Later, The Bulldogs were waking up. As they open their eyes they realize they’re chained up.
“Who was stupid enough to try to chain me up?” Chef shouts struggling.
“I’ve never hated a challenge more than now,” Bradley groans still waking up.
“Never say never,” a mysterious voice squeaks.
Out of the shadows appears the wanted pop star. He’s a short man, with the face like a weasel and a voice to match.
“It’ a pleasure to meet some of the infamous cast of Total Drama’s newest season,” Dustine greets.
“The pleasure is all yours,” Barbie replies.
“What is going on man?” Cosmic River asks. “Why are you faking this reality show?”
“Simple,” Dustine replies. “My superiors have paid me to make Total Drama look bad. Though based on your looks, you seem to be doing a fine job of that on your own.”
“And I suppose your superiors are related to R.O.T.I. and our mad scientist friend?” Bradley asks.
“Maybe,” Believer sheepishly replies.
“Why are you working for people connected to R.O.T.I.?” Barbie asks.
“I’m afraid you already know too much,” Dustine replies angrily. He snaps his fingers and his bodyguards pull out machine guns. They hold up the guns in the air and fire them off, showing they’re fully loaded.
“How cliché,” Barbie states. “You want to pet a cat while you do this?”
“Kill her first,” the celebrity states. “Heh, heh. Time to shoot the dog…”
“Julie Noforthwal, Julie Noforthwal. Who are you? What have you sacrificed?”
“Who just sang that?” Barbie asks.
“Don’t try to postpone the inevitable,” Dustine states.
“Julie Noforthwal, Julie Noforthwal. Who are you? What have you sacrificed?”
“I hear it too,” Cosmic River states.
“JULIE NOFORTHWAL SUPERSTAR! DO YOU THINK YOU’RE WHAT THEY SAY YOU ARE?”
Suddenly Julie and her team ram their snowmobiles into the tent, and crash into Dustine’s big guards.
”Baby, baby…what…how did you…” Dustine asks.
“KICK IN THE NUTS!” Julie shouts, kicking the celebrity in the nuts. He shrieks and falls over in pain.
“Look it’s Sharissa’s team!” Lindsay shouts.
“Close enough,” Julie states.
She and her team begin freeing the Bulldogs, who recap the events that lead them here.
“So Dustine and the scientist are connected?” Sierra asks. “Creepy.”
“Well at least now we can take this washed up hack to jail and maybe get some answers,” Bradley states.
“And we win the challenge!” Cody states.
“And since Team Indestructible is nowhere to be seen,” Chef states. “We get second place! Ha!”
“How did you know to find us anyway Juliet?” Lindsay asks.
“Oh, we were already close by when we heard gunshots,” Julie replies. “Fearing the worst we dashed off to catch up to you!”
“How did you get by the rest of Dustine’s security?” Lindsay asks.
“Uh…we just sped away from them,” SG says. “You don’t think they’ll be a problem do you?”
“Could be,” a voice states.
The two teams turn around to see a squad of Dustine’s security guards. They spray knockout gas into the room.
“Of course,” Barbie states.
“Today is just not our day man,” Cosmic River comments as his knees buckle.
Slowly all of the contestants fall into a deep sleep…and begin a new nightmare.
On Thin Ice
Meanwhile in the plane, Jovi is sitting in first class, reading the magazine and using a laptop.
Jovi is shown in the confessional. “I’ve tried to find any leads as to why this would make Rosamond upset. The fashion is fine, no furs, the designer is a good-hearted man…maybe she just felt bad compared to the model. I can understand why, she is insanely gorgeous.”
Jovi flips the magazine around to the camera to show a picture of the model. She was a tall, resplendent woman, draped in exotic clothes that seem to highlight her beauty. Or perhaps she highlighted the worth of the clothes. She was a natural blond, her hair light and pale but saintly. Her brown eyes were warm and inviting. She was so awe-inspiring it can break the fourth wall, and we had to write a whole paragraph about how prepossessing she was.
“Wait a minute…” Jovi says to herself. “Duh! I got to search this.”
A little later, Jovi is reading intently the computer. Rosamond marches in smiling with her cats.
“Hi Jovi!” Rosamond greets.
Slamming the computer suddenly, Jovi looks up. “Hey Rosamond. You seem rather blithe.”
“I was actually a little sad and mad early,” Rosamond admits. “But I’ve calmed down a little. And I found that fall gave me this really cool scab! It’s even a little oozy!”
“That’s superb,” Jovi replies. “The happiness. I actually have something serious I want to discuss. Please sit. ”
“Oh,” Rosamond says sitting. “Sure thing. What’s the matter?”
Well,” Jovi says. “Rosamond you’re one of my best friends. And lately I feel like you’ve been trying to avoid me. Particularly after we read that magazine of Bridgette’s.”
“There was nothing involving that magazine,” Rosamond says, shifting her eyes.
“Don’t be coy,” Jovi replies. “I was worried about what was amiss, so I did some digging and I understand. The supermodel we gushed over and was featured in the issue…was your mom.”
“You…you found out who my mother was?” Rosamond asks.
“It’s not that big a deal,” Jovi replies. “I was just trying to make sure you-“
SLAP!
Jovi holds her hand up to her cheek.
“Rosamond…” Jovi asks confused.
“Oh my gosh…” Rosamond gasps. She immediately bursts into tears and grabs Jovi in a hug.
“Are you okay?” Rosamond asks sobbing. “Do you need more medical attention?”
Jovi laughs a little bit. “I’m fine. It was just a slap. You alright?”
"I’m so sorry Jovi,” Rosamond goes on. “I overreacted. You were just trying to be a good friend and I hurt you. Are you sure you’re fine?”
“Yes,” Jovi states. “Are you? You’re acting kind of crazy.”
“I’m sorry,” Rosamond replies, stopping her crying. “But…please don’t bring up my mother. I’m not really comfortable talking about…her.”
“I was just trying to help,” Jovi replies.
“I know,” Rosamond replies. “But I think…you went about the wrong way. Some issues you shouldn’t meddle in, mostly because they can’t be fixed. I feel like…like you’re treating me like a child who needs your guidance. But I’m not, I’m your friend.”
“Oh Rosamond,” Jovi replies. “You are my friend. I didn’t realize I was distressing you.”
“That’s all the more reason you have to be upset at me for slapping you,” Rosamond states.
“I can’t be mad at you,” Jovi replies. “You’re right, it wasn’t right of me to meddle. I was…wrong.”
“It’s okay,” Rosamond replies. “I’m just glad you’re okay, and you’re here with me.”
The two hug for a bit longer before pulling apart and sitting down. After a moment of catching their breath, Rosamond speaks up.
“Jovi,” the catgirl says. “You know earlier…when we were attacked with the missiles, and I saw the plane.”
“Yeah,” Jovi replies.
“Well on the plane was that phrase, R.O.T.I.,” Rosamond explains.
“Oh god,” Jovi sighs. “I know it wasn’t coincidence that scientist said that. But this is getting out of hand.”
“It’s not just that,” Rosamond replies. "I saw the front of the plane. And I don’t want to believe it…but I could’ve sworn…”
Rosamond takes deeper breathes.
“It’s okay Rosamond,” Jovi replies. “You can tell me, I’ve got your back.”
“Thank you...I could’ve sworn that the pilot of the plane…was Mr. Mackenzie.”
"Wake up!”
Julie bursts her eyes open to see she, her teammates and The Bulldogs tied up. They’re sitting in the snow, helpless in the slimy hands of Dustine Believer and two burly bodyguards.
"Glad you cared to join me,” Dustine greets smugly.
“We couldn’t say no to those sweet invitations,” Barbie replies.
Glaring, the popstar continues. “You’ve proven to be more formidable than I thought. But you still aren’t a match for me I’m afraid.”
“I’d say we all are height wise,” the ironic goth chimes in.
“It seems I need to break you and deliver a message to the rest of Total Drama,” Dustine replies. “As you can see in front of you, there’s a frozen lake in front of us.”
“I actually can’t see,” Julie states. “Your big head is blocking the whole thing!”
Ignoring the comment, Dustine sticks his toe on the ice with some force. It begins to crack.
“The ice is very thin,” Dustine states. “One wrong move and it will break under your feet. After about thirty seconds of being submerged in this water, you die. If you make it across the ice, your life will be spared…”
“I doubt that…” Barbie mumbles.
“If not, well everyone will be looking forward to see your new show,” Dustine laughs. “Total Drama Frozen! Hahaha!”
“Did you just rip off this idea from the Batman movie?” SG asks.
“No!” Dustine shouts. “Any last words?”
“Go kiss the backside of donkey you little twerp,” Julie states.
“Throw her first,” Dustine commands. “Then start with the fat one and the nerd.”
The guards pick up Julie, untie her and throw her onto the ice. Dustine and his men turn to watch, failing to notice SG squatting…
Weakly, Julie picks her self up cautiously. Gulping, she moves forward. Slowing inching herself forward, ignoring the crunching of ice under her feet.
“Stop struggling for life,” Dustine states. “You might not leave enough ice for your friends, haha.”
“You won’t get away with any of this!” Sierra shouts.
“Ha, no one can you save you now,” the wannabe celebrity states.
“Wait…whose that vague shadow in the distance?” Chef asks.
Off in the distance there is vague shadow that is vague and shadowy. Everyone squints to make out the unknown figure. They see it vaguely speed forward on a snowmobile. Hopeful light sees to be rising from behind it. The figure raises it’s fist in triumph…
The kidnapped contestants cheer as their unknown hero approaches.
“Ha!” Sierra laughs. “You were wrong and suck! A lot!”
“Impossible,” Dustine shireks.
The figure gets closer, approaching at high speed. Though still in the distance it’s comes closer to reveal itself from the shadows as a figure of justice, a champion, a-
“Buenos dies!” the figure cackles, waving a hatchet.
“Really?” SG asks.
“Isn’t that…” Lindsay starts to say.
“Yup,” Nellie interrupts. “She’s that little girl from then, and she’s actually an assassin trying to kill us. Don’t try to comprehend it.”
“Dora?” Dustine asks. “What is that freak doing here? These are my kill! Hey twit, you already screwed up once, why don’t you go back before you mess this up again!”
Dora flips him off.
“Wait…if Dustine knows Dora…that means they’re connected!” Lindsay exclaims.
“So what?” Dustine asks ticked off. “She only wants to kill you! You still have no one to save you…”
“Do you see a dead man?” Dora asks, preparing to throw the hatchet. “That’s right! Julie’s a dead man. Hope she doesn’t lose her head over it! Ha ha ha!”
And they all died. The End.
But that would be a sucky way to end this. So, let’s pretend something else happened.
“Do you see a dead man?” Dora asks, preparing to throw the hatchet. “That’s right! Julie’s a dead man. Hope she doesn’t lose her head over it! Ha ha ha!”
“OH MY GOD THAT IS AN AWFUL PUN!”
Suddenly, Pepper and Cinnamon come ramming their snowmobile into Dora’s. They send Dora flying off her snowmobile.
“No one tosses a dwarf!” Dora shouts, throwing her hatchet.
“Fail,” Cinnamon states emotionlessly as she catches the hatchet.
“Prepare to kiss my bumper fathead!” Pepper yelps as she runs over Dora with their snowmobile.
“Kill them!” Dustine shouts to his bodyguards. “You have guns, shoot them before something else…
“Goes wrong?” SG shouts freeing himself from the ropes. He throws a pocketknife in the knee of one of the bodyguards before punching Dustine in the face.
“Gahhhh!” Dustine screams falling over in pain.
In the moment of surprise, Pepper rams her snowmobile into the remaining bodyguards.
“WOO!” Pepper cheers.
SG begins untying Sierra’s ropes.
“Yay! Nothing can go wrong now!” Sierra cheers.
Crack. The ice breaks under Julie and she begins sinking into it.
“Help!” Julie cries as she desperately throws her upper body on the ice, slowly slipping into death.
“I was wrong!” Sierra cries. “HORRIBLY, HORRIBLY WRONG!”
Without a word, SG springs forward jumping from ice float to ice float. He reaches Julie.
“Grab my hand!” SG shouts.
“I…I can’t reach it!” Julie screams as she slips and falls into the suffocating water.
Panicking, SG grabs one of Julie’s braids and tries to pull her up, but is being pulled into the water instead.
In a flash, Cinnamon drives her snowmobile up to the ice and jumps on top of it, grabbing Julie’s other braid. Pepper gets behind her and helps her pull. The contestants they two interns had freed in the meantime join in.
Luckily for Julie, Chef and Bradley were whom they freed first. With enough heaving they manage to yank Julie and SG out of the ice, and pull them up on the snowmobile.
“Thank goodness…” SG sighs as he passes out on the ice float.
“We have to hurry,” Pepper states timidly. “We need to get her, and SG, heat or otherwise…they’ll freeze to death…”
“How are we going to save them?” Lindsay asks, on the verge of tears.
“In style,” Cinnamon states coldly.
Everyone turns to the awkward intern. She points forward, at Dustine’s stretch limo…
“APPLE BOTTOM JEANS! BOOTS WITH THE FUR!”
SG tries to open his eyes.
“Sierra you’re going to wake him up…to garbage no less.”
“Sorry, I wanted to see if it worked.”
SG suddenly remembers what’s happened and springs forward. “JULIE!”
“Hi,” Julie says simpering and waving from the side.
He sees that both his team and the Bulldogs are sitting in leather seats in a fancy limo, complete with a disco ball.
“What…”
“You tried to rescue Julie,” Barbie explains. “Cinnamon got up and with help saved you and her. You passed out. We stole Dustine’s limo, and threw him, Dora and his bodyguards in the trunk unconscious. We threw you and Julie in here to save your lives, and now we’re going back to the plane.”
“Ooh,” SG states. “Good. So…everything’s fine?”
“Yup!” Cosmic River cheers.
“I have a question though,” Lindsay says. “Where did that knife come from?” The others nod in agreement.
“Well,” SG says. “After all the crap that’s happened to us I decided it maybe a good idea to carry a weapon on me. I asked Rhonda for a couple of pocket knifes, she gave them to me, and decided to hide them on me. That’s how I was able to cut through the ropes.”
“Clever,” Barbie states.
SG blushes. “Where are the interns?”
“Driving the limo,” Barbie replies.
“Man now we can finally relax,” Cosmic River states, slipping on the back of his seats. “We got some sodas or waters in the cooler if you want some.”
“Thanks,” SG replies walking over to the cooler. He notices Julie glancing at him. She motions him to go towards the back of the limo. He nods and they exit into the other room.
“I just wanted to say thanks,” Julie replies. “You saved me, twice today.”
“No problem,” SG replies.
“Why?” Julie asks.
“Your life was in…"
“I know,” Julie interrupts. “But it was more than that.”
"It’s because I care about you,” SG states. “The truth is…I remember what happened in the sauna, right before I passed out. What I said…what you said.”
“I don’t want to sound ungrateful,” Julie replies. “But just because you save my life doesn’t mean I’m going to love you again.”
“I know,” SG replies. “I just…I wanted to prove to you that I’m sorry, that I can and I am here for you. I was an idiot before, but I’m not going to be again.”
"Wait so to prove you’re not an idiot you’re going to do life threatening things?” Julie asks.
“Yes,” SG replies. “I was trying to prove I’ve changed, that I’m not the same guy. I’m not too shy or scared to be there for you, to try. I admit I’m scared to put myself out here right now, but to make amends I’m going to.”
“I’m sorry I just, I just don’t know,” Julie replies. “I just want…want to be happy.”
“Happiness starts with self assurance,” SG replies. “I know that now.”
“Assurance?” Julie questions. “Pepper’s prophecy said that I needed to find assurance. She also said I would have two reunions today. One unpleasant, …like meeting with Dora again! But, what else did her prophecy say?”
“Julie,” SG states. “Before you go, I just…”
“EJECTION SEQUENCE ACTIVATED!”
“Huh?” Julie asks.
As the limo’s top comes down the contestants are shot out of the limo like a cannonball. They land with a thud in the snow. “Pepper, Cinnamon, what just happened?” Sierra asks the two interns.
The two interns shrug.
“Do you think it might have something to do with those limos parked over there?” Chef asks.
Dustine’s minions leave the nearby limos.
“Hmm could be,” Sierra replies.
“We really need to remember to deal with his minions,” Cody states.
Suddenly, Dustine and Dora are ejected from the trunk. Dustine’s minions catch the two.
“Hahaha!” Dustine laughs. “It’s game over losers! You were a bigger challenge than I expected, but you’ve lost now!”
“We can take you!” Julie shouts, jumping up. Dustine snaps and a minion pulls out a switch. Dustine pulls it. Suddenly, the limos drive together and begin circling around Dustine and his entourage. Suddenly they motion themselves up straight and form a tent. In a flash the limos fuse together, expanding and closing until…
“GRRRRRRRRRRRR!”
“Holy Toledo surprise!” Julie exclaims.
“CRAP.” Sierra shouts.
“Whoa man,” Cosmic River sighs.
“I didn’t think that was technologically possible,” SG blurbs.
“Somehow it is,” Nellie groans.
“…,” Barbie replies speechless.
“What The Heck?” the contestants scream.
Standing in front of them is a giant robot beaver, formed out of limos. I…I…yeah.
“My employers were generous enough to buy me these modifications,” Dustine states through a speaker, projecting outside of the beaver. “And I’ll put them to good use. Now…who to finish first. Eenie…meanie…miney…YOU!”
The giant beaver grabs Julie and SG and throws them over onto a mountain like snow drift.
Dazed, Julie stands up. “SG…”
“Help!”
Julie turns around and sees SG dangling from the ledge of the snowdrift. Over him is chasm hanging over icy spikes. The wind whips in their faces.
“SG!” Julie shouts. “Let go, I’ll grab your hand, I promise!”
“I trust you,” SG replies. He lets go and Julie grabs, and begins trying to pull him up.
“I forgive you,” Julie says, grunting as she pulls. “I admit I was hurt by what you done, but I understand. I feel the same way about myself…that’s why I thought you couldn’t have ever loved me. I was so weird, so ugly…so crazy.”
“You’re crazy,” SG replies. “But I like you because of it. You do things I’d be too afraid to do. Even simple things like being yourself, you’re just so yourself I can’t help but admire you. I was too scared to be open and to be myself. But I’m not now, because…I love you.”
“I love you too!” Julie yells, crying.
With the burst of her strength she pulls SG’s waist up onto the ledge. But before he can pull himself up fully, it breaks, and the two embrace each other as they plummet to their deaths.
The last sound they hear is the echo of their screams.
“NOOOOO!” Sierra screams as she falls to her knees. Nellie holds her.
“Classic!” Dustine laughs. “Huh, What’s that? Oh gosh, that’s a great idea Dora!”
Suddenly the robot comes forward and eats Sierra and Nellie. The robot unloads a cannon from his chest, and fires out his bodyguards into the snow.
“Surround them!” Dustine demands. “We’ll use them as bait for the other contestants and their little host too!”
“You’ll never get away with this!” Sierra screams from inside the robot. She and Nellie are in a cage suspended above the floor.
“Who’s going to stop me?” Dustine asks. “Hahaha! No one can save you now!”
Beep! Beep!
“What’s that noise?” Dustine squeals.
“It’s our radar,” a bodyguard states. “It picks up other vehicles and non sense making things. It has picked up something, and it’s coming our way fast.”
“Someone get a visual!” Dustine whines.
“Uh, sir, I think you might want to see this,” a bodyguard states.
A screen lowers down in front of Dustine and Dora who gasp.
“It can’t be!” Dustine exclaims. “How...no seriously how, this makes even less since than this robot!”
“OMG!” Sierra screams. “It’s Julie and SG! They’re alive!”
True to word, Julie and SG are on the screen, embracing each other in a hug. They open their eyes and cheer at their safety.
They’re with two other mysterious but familiar strangers…riding a strange, majestic creature; a chimera in a sense. It has the head, limbs and tail of a predatory cat with sleek gray fur. But its body is that like a sort of breakfast pastry, freshly popped out a toaster. It leaves behind a trail or double rainbows, a symbol of miracles. It’s Nyan Cat. They’re riding a Nyan Cat.
“We’re alive!” SG cheers. “We’re alive! But wait…how are we alive?”
“We were saved by two of my cousins,” Julie replies. “Just like Pepper predicted! I would have a reunion that was foreshadowed poorly! And my two cousins were only first mentioned at the beginning of the chapter!”
“Actually I’ve appeared in an aftermath previously,” a bearded man replies.
“Oh yeah,” Julie states. “SG, this is Dolph; Dolph this is SG. That explains the Nyan Cat-
“Not really,” SG interrupts.
But, how did you know I would be in trouble Dolph?” Julie asks.
“She knew,” Dolph replies, pointing towards a beautiful woman at the head of the cat.
Standing at the mast, an enigmatic figure. She is an obese woman dressed in pink, but still a vision; few know that Aphrodite was originally worshipped as curvier woman like she is. With her brown hair breezing through the wind, she is an angel. Yet her stance is that of a Valkyrie, ruling the skies with triumph. But her facial expression is that of a thinker; like a pupil…no, the teacher of Athena. To describe this unfathomably deep woman you would have to say, “she is a goddess among men.” She goes by many names; you may call her Staci.
“Who is she?” SG asks.
“My twice removed cousin’s sister’s cousin’s uncle’s niece,” Julie replies. “Her name is Staci. We aren’t exactly sure who named her that; her parents, the gods or likely she named herself.”
“Staci,” SG says aloud. “A variation of Stacy, short for Anastasia, meaning resurrection. It fits.”
Staci walks over to Julie and SG, and Julie and Staci hug.
“Staci, it’s so good to see you!” Julie exclaims. “But how did you know?”
“I had a hunch,” Staci replies. “After all our great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great-“
“I’m so sorry to interrupt,” SG states. “But uh…what are we going do about you know, the giant robot?”
“Hmm…” Julie ponders. “Wait, there was a part of Pepper’s prophecy; something about melting ice. Maybe, we can melt the ice around the robot and cause it to sink to the sea and short circuit!”
“Incoming!” Dolph shouts.
Missiles veer towards the cat but he destroys them by shooting rainbows out of his mouth.
“Dolph, get us in close to the robot,” Julie says. “We’ll sneak aboard while you distract it. Then will blow it up from the inside; it likely has a self-destruct button. But first, go down and drop off SG.”
“What?” SG asks. “No, I’m coming with you, I’m not going to let you go alone.”
“No offense SG,” Julie replies. “But you’re not exactly a fighter.”
“I fought pretty well today,” SG retorts. “Trust me, I can be of help.”
Julie sighs. "Okay."
Meanwhile in the robot, Dustine is in the middle of a diva meltdown, his mascara running. “No fair! No fair! No fair! No fair! No fair! No-“
“Ha!” Sierra laughs. “Julie and SG will rescue us and your stupid plan will be foiled! You guys are the most ineffective villains ever!”
“Oh yeah,” Dustine pouts. “Well would an ineffective villain do this?”
Dustine snaps and the floor opens up underneath Nellie and Sierra, revealing a hot tub…full of acid! Slowly, the cage descends.
“Maybe,” the uber fan replies. “A cliché villain would.”
“Sierra, don’t mock the murderers,” Nellie states. “It’s not going to keep us alive.”
“Even if you friends make it inside,” Dustine says. “All they will find is your bones floating in acid! While the tub is in jaccuzzi mode! Mawhahaha!”
“You fiend!” Sierra shouts. “Wait... couldn’t this acid melt our bones? Then they wouldn’t find anything when they get inside.”
“They won’t get inside,” Dora interrupts, holding a katana. “I’ll make sure of that.”
Suddenly the robot shakes.
“Sir we’ve been hit!” a bodyguard announces. “They’re firing rainbow lasers at us!”
“Well shoot them moron!” Dustine shouts. “Blow that cat sky high!”
The Nyan Cat swoops overhead the robot, as Staci, Julie, and SG parachute on it.
“We made it!” SG states. “Now if we can sneak aboard without being-“
“Hola!” Dora greets, unsheathing a katana.
“Crap.” Staci states, pulling out a katana from her backpack. “I’ll take care of her.”
“No,” Julie states glaring ahead. “She’s mine. Staci, you go ahead and watch over SG. I’ll take out the trash.”
Staci nods majestically and hands Julie the katana. Staci and SG move to the side.
Dora charges forward screaming. As she approaches, Julie flips over her and lands behind Dora. Julie attempts to kick her, but Dora blocks her with her hand. Dora slashes forward, but Julie deflects with her own blade.
“I targeted you and SG from the first moment,” Dora states as they swing their. “I admit I get a satisfaction of killing freaks and losers.”
“Isn’t that the pot calling the kettle black,” Julie replies. Julie jumps up in the air and twirls, slashing her blade and chopping away Dora’s other backpack strap. It falls off Dora's back and slides off the robot.
Dora charges in rage, and the sword dueling continues.
Meanwhile, Staci and SG have successfully infiltrated the robot.
“Alright,” Staci states. “We’re going to try to apprehend these crooks, but if worse comes to worse, we’ll hit the big red button and cause it to self destruct, yeah.”
“Why do you think it will be a big red button?” SG asks.
“My great, great, great, great, grandfather’s uncle invented self destruct sequences,” Staci replies. “Uh-huh, yeah before than villains were a lot less easy to foil.”
As the two sneak around, they see Dustine standing guard over his prisoners.
“Crap, he’s captured Nellie and Sierra and is slowly dunking them in acid!” SG exclaims in a whisper. “Really slowly.”
“I don’t know whether to be scared or bored,” Sierra admits to Nellie. The cage has descended about an inch from where it was.
“I’ll create a distraction and lure them away,” Staci states. “You free your friends and hit the self destruct, don’t worry about me.”
Staci jumps up, waving her arms and hollering, “I’m not a distraction! And you can’t catch me before I touch your things!”
“Don’t touch my stuff,” Dustine whines.
“I’m not touching it, I’m not touching it,” Staci comments, hovering her hands around Dustine’s albums. “I’m not touching it…”
“Everyone get her before she does touch it!” Dustine shouts.
He and all his bodyguards chase Staci down a corridor.
SG quickly scurries over to Sierra and Nellie.
“SG!” Sierra exclaims as he opens the cage. The two hop out and Sierra glomps them all in a group hug.
“But how?’ Nellie asks.
“No time to explain now,” the technophile replies. “And I’m not sure if I even could it explain it all. We need to find a big red button and set the self destruct.”
“How cliché,” Sierra states.
“I know right?” SG replies.
The three maneuver around the large control panel. SG comes up to a large computer.
“Huh,” he mumbles to himself and begins typing at the keys.
Suddenly, a TV screen pulls down, revealing Dolph and the Nyan cat and the beaver robot still fighting. Suddenly, a missile ejects from the robot and hits the Nyan cat.
“Even though nobody is here they’re still fighting,” SG whispers. “Let’s change that…”
Suddenly the robot freezes.
“What did you do?” Sierra asks.
“Turned off auto pilot,” SG replies. “They’re piloting this robot by giving it a set of instructions from this computer in a very basic source code. I think that I can successfully hack into this thing.”
The robot turns itself around to face the remaining contestants fighting off Dustine’s bodyguards. The robot suddenly shoots out nets, tying them all up.
“Nice,” SG replies. “Now, I think I can manually activate the self destruct from here and increase the length. I can even lock them out of it, so they can’t stop this monstrosity from blowing up. …There, done. Ten minutes till this whole thing goes up in smoke. ”
“Woo!” Sierra cheers. “That was pretty impressive SG.”
"Very impressive,” someone states.
The three turn around to see Dustine holding a gun to them.
At the same time, Dora and Julie continue to duel about the robot. They both swing their blades, clinging together. They both try and push the other’s blade exerting as much force as they can. Julie manages to force Dora towards the edge.
“Give up,” Julie states. “Your whole plan is falling apart as we speak, and I’ve got you on the edge.”
“Oh really?” Dora replies smirking. Suddenly, Dora pulls her blade away and summersaults into the air, causing Julie to fall forward. Dora swipes her blade, knocking Julie’s out of her hand. As Julie turns around, Dora swings again and makes a direct hit…
“Ah!” Julie cries in pain. Jule puts her hand up to her face, and feels herself bleeding.
Dora pokes Julie with her blade.
“Hold on,” Dora states. “I want to see your face when you die.”
Julie closes her eyes and extends out her arms in defeat.
Dora charges her blade forward.
Julie opens her eyes and whips her braids with precision, tangling her left one in Dora’s blade. Julie swings her hair and tosses Dora over her shoulder. Dora slashes Julie’s braid, tearing it off.
“Ha!” Dora laughs.
Dora stops laughing when she realizes she’s now falling off the edge of the robot.
“Curse you!” Dora screams, falling into the dark crevice below.
At the same time, Dustine continues cornering the remaining members of the Fun Bunch.
“Such hard work, but I’m afraid it was for not,” Dustine states. “You may have foiled all of my plans, but I can still appease my employers by offing you three! Any last words?”
SG gulps and reaches into his pockets, feeling for his pocket knife. He finds something and throws it...but it's the troll doll Rosamond gave him.
Dustine fires his gun...but the troll doll has gotten lodged in it, causing it to recoil and propel Dustine backwards…halfway submerging his face into the acid hot tub.
"Ahhhhh!” he screams as he pulls his face out and lies on the ground. “My face, my gorgeous face!”
“Five minutes till self-destruct,” a computer voice narrates.
“We should go,” SG states.
“Shouldn’t we help him,” Nellie states.
“Die!” Dustine screams, as he fires his gun.
“Beep beep!” Sierra screams as she and the Fun Bunch run away down a corridor.
“Where do we go?” Nellie asks.
“Up here!” A familiar voice states, from inside a hatch.
“One minute to self destruct.”
Exiting through the hatch, they find Julie and Staci up top.
Sierra pounces on her friend. “Julie!”
“Sierra! Nellie!”
“Dolph!” Julie’s cousin yells.
“Thirty seconds till self destruct.”
Staci starts throwing the Fun Bunch on Dolph’s Nyan Cat, before hopping on herself and dashing away.
Self destruct commencing...
“Self destruct commencing, have a nice day.”
BBBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMM!
Here Comes The Sun
The robot bursts into a fury of flames, before the ice melts from under it and it slowly falls down into the dark crevice below.
The Fun Bunch look on, while standing on a snowy peak.
“We did it! We did it!” Sierra cheers.
“We actually didn’t do anything besides get kidnapped Sierra,” Nellie adds.
“You guys were our morale support,” Julie jokes.
“Adios…” SG remarks as the robot finally sinks away.
“Wait…adios,” Julie recalls. “When you say adios…DUCK!”
Julie grabs her friends in pulls them down as a ‘BANG’ noise rings through the air.
They turn around to see a figure in a full body spy suit, colored bright pink. They wear a mask that looks like that of a plague doctor. They’re holding a recently fired shotgun.
Julie grabs SG’s pocket knife and flings it, knocking the gun out of the specter’s hands.
“Who are you?” Julie shouts.
“You got lucky this time,” the specter replies, in a deep computerized voice. “But next time, I’ll make sure you’re dead.”
The figure dives down into the crevice, until it can no longer be seen in the darkness. No sound is heard.
Later, the two teams, and two interns have driven to the plane. Team Indestructible is there, having recently arrived. The hosts have also returned.
“Where were you guys?” Julie asks.
“We got separated after being attacked by that girl from Mexico,” Bridgette recaps. “Then we got lost in the snow, and ended up heading east... What happened to you guys?”
Julie recaps the recent events. The others backed her up on the more crazy parts.
“So what was that cat thing anyway?” Bradley asks.
“I’m telling myself it’s either some kinda robot, mutated animal or came from Boney Island,” Heather replies. “That’s where most illogical creatures from this show come from.”
“So they all fell into the ocean?” Nate asks.
“Something tells me we haven’t seen the last of them,” SG states.
“I’d be inclined to agree with you,” Rosamond adds. “I saw him...I saw Mr. Mackenzie.”
She recounts the details of what she saw, including the black plane labeled ‘R.O.T.I.’.
“So he’s alive too,” Julie worries.
“Well, we’ll alert the authorities,” Chris states. “For now let’s be thankful we are alright, and we were able to repair the plane. More importantly, we have an elimination to do.”
“After all that’s happened?” Courtney questions.
“It’s the best way to end the show,” Chris remarks. “Since the challenge was to stop this other reality show and get that creep, Julie’s team wins and gets to be in first class and win some hot chocolate! And since Team Indestructible failed to even show up, you guys get to boot someone. See in you a half-hour!”
As the Fun Bunch make their way to first class, SG stops Julie.
SG clears his throat. "S...so, now what..."
Julie smiles. "Let's put all this mess behind us...And contiune being close..."
"Like, like dating?" SG asks. "Cause I'm cool with that. But if you aren't than that..."
Julie plants a kiss on SG's cheek.
"Oh," SG replies, blushing.
Later, Courtney, Jovi and Bridgette are alone in a section of the economy class.
“I guess Nate is with Rosamond in the infirmary,” Bridgette states. “So…whom should we vote out?”
“We only really have one option,” Courtney states. “Trent.”
“I guess so,” Jovi sighs.
“It’s not like we’d be weak without him,” the C.I.T. explains. “Besides, he hardly talks to us…or talks period.”
“Not since Taylor was eliminated,” Jovi adds.
“I hate to think this,” Bridgette whispers. “But…do you think Trent could be the saboteur?”
“After today the least I want to think about is the saboteur,” Courtney states, slouching and grabbing her temple. “But he has a lot of repressed anger, and no one is really around. It’s a strong possibility. But just because our team hasn’t been sabotaged, doesn’t mean our team is harboring the creep.”
“But it would make sense,” the surfer states. “He doesn’t have a lot of allies, so to keep his team safe he hurts the other teams. He couldn’t get the chance today. What do you think Jovi?”
Jovi shrugs.
“You’ve hardly said a word since we’ve come back,” Courtney states. “It’s worrying me.”
“Did something happen?” Bridgette asks.
“I talked to Rosamond and I…I was wrong,” Jovi states. “And now I was wrong at this challenge. The direction I told you to go in was the wrong way…”
“We couldn’t see in that snow,” Bridgette interrupts. “We could have been going the wrong way. It’s alright.”
“I guess,” Jovi states.
Jovi is shown in the confessional. “I’ve always been the girl who was always right. But since being on this show I’ve been wrong so many times now. Am I not who I thought I was? Maybe I’m not as smart as I believed…”
Later, Team Indestructible is shown at the elimination ceremony.
“Rather disappointing performance from the supposedly indestructible team,” Chris states. “We have five barf bags here but only…”
Trent stands up and grabs a parachute. “I quit.”
“Wait…what?” Chris asks. “You can’t just-“
“Why bother?” Trent asks. “I mean they all voted for me didn’t they. All because I’m not that in their little clique.”
“Because you never talk to us or seem to want to be a part of this team,” Courtney remarks.
Trent rolls his eyes and glares at Jovi. “I’m not the one who failed this team, and continues to fail to lead this team. I I voted for you tonight anyway, because it should’ve been you going home.”
“Well just go if you’re going,” Chris pouts. “You were going to anyone.”
Trent takes the drop of shame without another word.
Rosamond hugs Jovi, but Jovi sighs.
Later at night, Chris and Rhonda are shown to be in the cockpit of the plane.
“Well there goes all the tension out of this nutty episode,” Chris complains. “What will happen with Jovi and Rosamond? Are SG and Julie now a couple? And what are Barbie and Cosmic River going to do to survive till the merge? Find out next time, on Total Drama What The Heck?”
In an airport at midnight, a mysterious trenched figure approaches a bench. The figure takes a seat next to another person.
“Well agent?” the figure asks, in a kind of…familiar voice.
The person turns their head to reveal they are…Staci.
“I made it in the nick of time,” Staci replies. “Our Intel from Bermuda was right. I intercepted an attack of D.U.M.P.’s. They failed, but unfortunately their big agents got away.”
“What about the minions?”
“They don’t know nothing,” Staci replies.
“What about the cast of Total Drama?”
“They have their suspicions about who is attacking them,” Staci answers. “And they are on the right track. But for D.U.M.P.’s involvement, or ours for that matter, they haven’t a clue.”
“No one questioned you sudden appearance?”
“I told you my relative would let me appear without a trace,” Staci remarks. “She’s so crazy, they thought my appearance was just a random joke. Helps I brought another crazy family member.”
“Hmm…” the cloaked figure ponders. “Some info seems to indicate that there maybe another chance for you to get close again. I’m sending you and your friend agent Dawn to find out more.”
“Understood,” Staci replies.
“I’m also going to send agent Double 7 O,” the figure adds.
Staci groans. “But he’s no fun yeah. Nobody has been so not fun since when my great, great, great aunt’s sister’s son’s childhood friend he married, invented Tupperware parties.”
“He could prove valuable,” the figure replies. “I don’t want to put all are eggs in one basket, but I’m not going to put only one.”
Staci nods. “But…never mind.”
“What?”
“It’s just…” Staci stammers. “We aren’t hurting them by not telling them the whole truth are we? Shouldn’t we just inform them?”
The figure shakes their head. “Maybe later, but not now. I’m worried if we make it know, we’ll only be putting them in more danger. But rest assured I swear that will stop D.U.M.P. or my name isn’t…
Well, you know what is agent Staci.”
Chapter 14 True Beauty
Location: Milan
Elimination Chart
| # | Contestant | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 8 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Cody | Debuts | WIN | IN | LOW | SAFE | WIN | ||||||
| Gwen | IN | IN | IN | WIN | LOW | SAFE | WIN | LOW | IN | SAFE | WIN | |
| 24.5/ | Julie | IN | WIN | LOW | WIN | OUT | Returns | WIN | IN | IN | SAFE | WIN |
| Nellie | IN | IN | IN | WIN | IN | SAFE | WIN | LOW | IN | SAFE | WIN | |
| SG | IN | IN | IN | WIN | IN | SAFE | WIN | IN | IN | SAFE | WIN | |
| Sierra | IN | IN | IN | WIN | IN | SAFE | WIN | IN | IN | SAFE | WIN | |
| Barbie | IN | IN | SAFE | SAFE | SAFE | WIN | LOW | WIN | SAFE | IN | SAFE | |
| Bradley | IN | WIN | SAFE | SAFE | SAFE | WIN | IN | WIN | SAFE | LOW | SAFE | |
| Chef Hatchet | IN | IN | SAFE | SAFE | SAFE | WIN | IN | WIN | SAFE | IN | SAFE | |
| Cosmic River | IN | IN | SAFE | SAFE | SAFE | WIN | IN | WIN | SAFE | IN | SAFE | |
| Heather | IN | IN | SAFE | SAFE | SAFE | WIN | LOW | WIN | SAFE | IN | SAFE | |
| Lindsay | IN | IN | SAFE | SAFE | SAFE | WIN | IN | WIN | SAFE | IN | SAFE | |
| Bridgette | IN | IN | WIN | IN | WIN | IN | SAFE | IN | WIN | WIN | IN | |
| Courtney | IN | IN | WIN | IN | WIN | IN | SAFE | IN | WIN | WIN | IN | |
| Nate | Debuts | SAFE | IN | WIN | WIN | IN | ||||||
| Rosamond | IN | IN | WIN | IN | WIN | IN | SAFE | IN | WIN | WIN | IN | |
| Jovi | IN | WIN | WIN | IN | WIN | IN | SAFE | IN | WIN | WIN | LOW | |
| 18th | Trent | IN | IN | WIN | IN | WIN | LOW | SAFE | IN | WIN | WIN | QUIT |
| 19th | DJ | IN | IN | SAFE | SAFE | SAFE | WIN | IN | WIN | SAFE | OUT | |
| 20th | Mikey | IN | IN | IN | WIN | IN | SAFE | WIN | IN | OUT | ||
| 21st | Geoff | IN | IN | WIN | IN | WIN | IN | SAFE | QUIT | |||
| 22nd | Noah | IN | IN | IN | WIN | IN | SAFE | WIN | OUT | |||
| 23rd | Duncan | IN | IN | SAFE | SAFE | SAFE | WIN | OUT | ||||
| 24th | Taylor | IN | IN | WIN | LOW | WIN | OUT | |||||
| 25th | Justin | IN | IN | WIN | OUT | |||||||
| 26th | LeShawna | IN | IN | OUT | ||||||||
| 27th | Collin | IN | OUT | |||||||||
Trivia
Thank You
- Thanks to Gideon for coming up with great idea of Chef Hatchet becoming a contestant. He also also given grammar help and many great suggestions.
- Thanks to Reddy for making the elimination chart and for designing the characters' images!
- Thanks to Jay for checking spelling and grammar. It was really bad before Jay edited it.
- Thanks to everyone who reads, gives ideas and supports this fanfic! I love you!
Prologue
- The idea is its pretty much TDWT but with a new jet, new characters, new places and roughly about one song.
- This takes place after TDWT and TDROTI never happened.
- In every episode someone says "What The Heck?" besides in the title. They may say it alone or in a sentience with or without all capital letters .
- All debuting contestants (unless otherwise mentioned) are seventeen years old, the same as the returning contestants.
- TDWT was supposedly taking place during winter-spring due to Cody celebrating his birthday, which was said to be in spring earlier. While I believe it was an error on the writers/creator part, this is true in the story. Therefore, the competition takes place during the summer of that year. The contestants will start their last year of high-school next year.
- Though the plane is mostly a replica of the original, it is a little larger which makes it's economy section longer with more hallways and first class a little bigger. It also shows and mentions extra rooms never seen, such as the kitchen and shower rooms.
- The challenges take place every three days (the actual challenge on the third day) like I assume TDI does though the challenges may not be on the third day and that fact seems over looked on the show.
- Since the show is under a new network, some changes including to budget and set up have been made.
Chapter 1 Prepare for Take-Off!
- When Rhonda and Chris were debating who won last season, Chris said it "depends on where you live." This was referring to the two alternate endings of TDWT and who really won. I think Heather did win even if Al won in Canada but that is just me.
- Before the revamp, the returning contestants had no introductions. I added introductions as I felt it made them seem less important, and to foreshadow future events.
- Rhonda calls Duncan every ravioli pixie's dream. This is a reference to Sunshine the Ravioli Pixie, a character and avatar frm a user on this wiki.
- Leshawna was introduced as the last of the returning contestants, as a bit of a joke she'd be the one to get last place of them.
- When Julie attacks him Chris says "What The Heck?" This makes Rhonda think the show is called Total Drama What The Heck? which it is called from than on.
- Julie says 'Delicioso'. This is an allusion to Dora The Explorer. Delicioso is what her backpack always says. This is kind of ironic, considering a character based on Dora shows up later.
- When Julie references Noah Puckerman, a Glee character who shares his name with Noah, but is the complete opposite in personality.
- Julie says "wave our hair back and forth" which is an allusion to the Willow Smith song, Whip My Hair.
- Julie asks how does Lemmie, do all the rhyming. She is alluding to Lemmie, the Total Drama Culture contestant.
- Julie references to 'Toady' is a reference to Toad. It was originally 'Mody' before the revamp, in reference to another character, but that character was less relevant, so I changed it.
Chapter 2 Jungle Fever
- This chapter was originally titled Made In China. It was to take place at the Yangtze River in China. I didn't think there was a forest there so I changed to the Amazon Rainforest because it has both the forest and the Amazon River. I couldn't think of a catchy title so I named the chapter that as a joke originally. During the revamp, I changed it to 'Jungle Fever' as the old title seemed less funny and more lazy.
- Chris says "What The Heck?" this episode when Rhonda hits him.
- Since Chef uses an inflatable as an auto-pilot I decided Rhonda should use something as well. I decided upon a monkey, because monkeys [in fictional media anyway] are portrayed as being pilots of spaceships.
- Bobobo name comes from an anime named Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. The main character was very goofy and named Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo but was usually called Bobobo for short.
- Bobobo previously being a smoker was inspired by a scene in the cancelled Total Drama College.
- Chris saying "good grief" is a reference to Charlie Brown.
- When Julie says "So yeah your face is pretty soft" is based on what a marshmallow said in a video called Marshmallow People by FlimCow, the makers of Charlie The Unicorn.
- Julie throwing up wasn't meant to be a bulemic joke, and is a bit harsher in hindsight
- Izzy's disappearance was suppose to be mentioned in the first chapter but I forgot, so I included it here.
- The bridge Izzy died on was the Golden Gate Bridge. Izzy's watery death is an allusion to Legacy. Izzy's death was going to be the same as her death in Legacy but I changed it for some reason.
- I had trouble writing for the American Idol judges because I have never seen American Idol. I decided to do the old judges because I had seen more parodies of them than the new ones. I'm not really sure why I decided to parody American Idol in the first place.
- Natalie Orki was a sweet little girl who was on another show Simon was a judge for. Simon was very rude in judging her final song and didn't treat her like a child, being to harsh for someone her age.
- Rhonda says will get Ellen to be a new judge after flinging the judges out of the plane. This is an allusion to Ellen quitting American Idol which was a big deal in the media at the time.
- During the revamp, I added the joke about the jokes never becoming dated. Since in my opinion, the jokes became very dated.
- The reason the contestants can play the idol before or after the votes, or after the barf bags are passed out, is incase I need to do one of those options for the plot.
- The things Julie says in the confessional are allusions to many things.
- When she says eat that "Eat that Gwen, Lindsay and LeShawana" she is talking about them being the first to use the confessional each season (in that order).
- When she says thanks Toad she is alluding to Toadgamer80, who voted for her in the winning guessing contest.
- The cake is a lie is a quote that Glados from Portal says.
- Vote Pedro is a reference to Napoleon Dynamite.
- The Na Na Na Batman thing is a reference to the 1960s Batman.
- I'm a bad kid and I will survive is a line from Lady Gaga's song Bad Kids.
- And her telling you to read fanfictions from this wiki is cause this wiki is awesome!
- Julie and Sierra sing a line from the "We Did It" Song from Dora the Explorer. Again kind of ironic and weird considering Dora did show up.
- Courtney joins Bridgette because she is the only friend Courtney has. Courtney says the more the merrier because she doesn't wanna get kicked out of the group.
- Trent and Justin are members of the Total Drama Brothers Band so thats why they joined forces.
- Mikey was not originally gonna join forces with Sierra, Julie and Nellie but I didn't know who to partner him with and they seemed good together.
- Cosmic River and Taylor being partners is because I didn't know who else they would work with and I didn't want them alone, and I thought it fit Cosmic River's character for him to try and cheer Taylor up.
- SG had to be alone because he was always planned to join Julie's group later.
- Jovi saying "I knew we shoulda taken that left toin at Albukoikee" is allusion to Bugs Bunny.
- Julie sings "Poll la la Polly". This is a reference to Polly Pocket.
- The joke about the dark side and the cookies is based on a joke my friend told me, which she read from an app.
- The name for the Fun Bunch is what my former teacher called groups of students who got together and chat at inappropriate times. It sounded like a name that would be easy enough to remember and fit thme.
- The narration saying., 'Meanwhile at the Legion of' is a reference to Superfriends.
- Pugil sticks are sticks with foam ends like those used in duels on that show Gladiators.
- The winners of the race were going to have helmets, but I forgot about wanting that at the time of writing.
- Rhonda says yes, yes you are. That line is a reference to Phineas and Ferb.
- Since the rules for picking people were established as they were, a male would have been eliminated, even if Collin was chosen.
- Jovi and Bradley's confessionals were used to explain why Gwen was last. Truthfully she was last because I didn't want Gwen on the same team as Courtney and more importantly I wanted Barbie on Bradley's team for plot reasons.
- The teams weren't named in this chapter because I forgot about that till I started to post it, and decided to leave it for next chapter.
- In a very early draft, the teams were going to be very different;
- Jovi's team: Jovi, Courtney, Mikey, Rosamond, Geoff, Bridgette, Cosmic River, Lindsay
- Bradley's team: Bradley, Duncan, Gwen, DJ, Heather, Chef, Barbie, Justin
- Julie's team: Julie, Nellie, SG, LeShawna, Noah, Sierra, Trent, Taylor
Chapter 3 Drama Is Served
- I made this chapter when I was waiting on lunch so thats why there is a lot of food and food references.
- Jovi's team was originally called Team Indestructible, because I couldn't think of anything better. During the reboot, I changed it to Team Adamnatine, as it sounded more confusing, which fit Jovi's character a lot better.
- Julie's team is actually an allusion to several other team names in this list (list originally made by Reddy):
- The Killer (Canon reference)
- Kleptomaniacal (A reference to a previous story, Total Drama Outback)
- Top Banana Bottom Feeding (A reference to a previous story, Total Drama: The All Stars)
- Perci (TD:PB reference)
- OVER 9000 (TDS reference)
- Muskies (LTDI reference)
- Goth (My love of goth characters and TDT)
- Magical Whatnot (TDC reference)
- Globetrotting Locusts (TDL reference)
- Studded (TDStardom reference)
- Jumping (Another reference to Total Drama Outback)
- Lemmings (A reference to a previous story, Total Drama Re-docked)
- MEH BUKKIT (TDL/TDA reference)
- League Of Super Justice (not really a reference)
- Noah says "What The Heck?" this chapter after hearing the new team name.
- Julie says That 70's Show which is an allusion to That's 70's Show.
- The Killer Kleptomaniacal Top Banana Bottom Feeding Perci OVER 9000 Muskies of Goth Magical Whatnot Globetrotting Locusts Studded Jumping Lemmings MEH BUKKIT League Of Super Justice! was called the Fun Bunch after what the group calls themselves in Chapter 2. I ended up changing this in later chapters, as I wanted the Fun Bunch to refer to the specific group.
- The dinner was based on a meal I had on a five day long field trip.
- Sierra mentioning Cody was also to bring up him and his relationship to Sierra, establishing him for when he was brought back.
- Julie's mention of a giant lamprey is a reference to The Legend of Total Drama Island. It was a joke added during the reboot.
- Rosamond and Jovi talking about boys, was to introduce the idea that Rosamond had a crush. This was to establish Nate.
- Rosamond cites both SG and Bradley as cute. I mentioned so crushes characters had on them would make sense because they are thought of as attractive.
- When Julie is talking about Cow Pie, she means cow poop, which is big enough to be a pie.
- Julie's nickname for SG, Puddin, is based on Harley Quinn's (from Batman) nickname for the Joker, which is also, "Puddin."
- Rosamond's troll dolls are based on a troll doll the Rosamond from Nate The Great got while on a trip. She had Nate solve the mystery of where it had gone.
- A winning featured quote (my first featured quote) came from this chapter.
- Originally, Rhonda was more strict about following the recipe, as it was what I was taught in school. However as Frank pointed how, variation can make recipes better. In the reboot, I lessened her strictness on it, and had her not want them to stray due to how complicated the recipes were.
- Also in the reboot, I mentioned the redheaded intern earlier to establish her sooner.
- Noah referring to Julie as 'the great and powerful' is a Wizard of Oz reference.
- Sierra's mentioning of a rat cooking for them is a reference to Ratatoullie.
- Julie's mention of her creation is a reference to Sunny D Pasti.
- Julie's reference to 'first door to the right, and straight on 'til morning' is a Peter Pan reference.
- Courtney's confessional about Jovi was also added in the revamp. It was meant to be misleading about their conflict, which would resolve this chapter.
- In Bradley's confessional, he says Barbie won't give him any trouble. This was foreshadowing of Barbie's future events.
- Also in Bradley's confessional, he describes Duncan as the most obnxious contestant ever. I imagine Bradley wasn't a fan of all the screentime he's gotten over the past seasons, which is probably a small factor in his reasoning.
- Noah's confessional was added in the reboot to give him more character.
- During the reboot, I changed some of Leshawna's lines to make her sound more like a team player. It was part of her strategy to get liked by her team so she'd have a better chance of staying.
- If the Bulldogs lost, Rhonda would likely have reviewed the footage of the team, and made Barbie and Cosmic River immune for their kindness (if Chris let her). Duncan would likely have been voted off if they were immune.
- In the reboot, I changed it to Noah talking to Sierra. I thought Noah being kind of closer with Sierra would have made a better choice to talk with her, along with trying to make it seem not to be Leshawna's planning. Ultimately, Sierra was closer with the newbies were because they accepted her (in my opinion that's why she didn't vote with them despite being offered).
- Similar to Sierra, in my opinion Nellie never would've sided with Noah because despite how their friendship formed (with a sack), Nellie was liked and accepted amongst the Fun Bunch, despite her weirdness.
- Also in the reboot, I changed it so that SG still showed loyalty to the Fun Bunch and cited out Leshawna. This was to show he wasn't so easily convinced to betray his friends, which I felt he was (very quickly) in the original.
- I did feel Leshawna's elimination was a bit cliche, costing the challenge and people voting her out for it, but I did try and add the extra reasoning of LeShawna being seen as the ringleader.
- Leshawna was always planned as the second to go. On retrospective, I felt I could've done more with her, but she just felt expendable.
Chapter 4 Denial Ain't Just A River In Egypt
- Julie makes a reference to the Friday song, by Rebecca Black. When this chapter was written, a lot of fanfictions referenced this song, which made Julie's joke about it more accurate. If you don't remember the phenomenon, it was basically about a song everyone hated.
- As part of the revamp, I reworked SG's confessional, to better show how SG's feelings about the matter, and as part of exploring Julie's character. The confessional is a bit of realistic take on a Manic Pixie Dream Girl, and how in reality it'd be suspicious.
- Before the revamp, Julie's grammar correction speech was longer, but I shortened because I feared the joke was going on too long. The grammar corrections are actually Gideon's words as well, about corrections to this very story. Her referencing tropes was also shortened, because I felt the joke was going on too long.
- It was changed so Rhonda chased Julie off, where originally Rhonda tricked Julie into leaving. Looking at the story again, Rhonda's craziness was played down over chapters, so I worked on keeping Rhonda the straight man at times, but still crazy.
- Another part of the revamp was shortening Rosamond, Courtney and Jovi's talk, since I felt I didn't need that much space to convey everything. I did add the horror movie joke.
- Trent remarking that Bridgette and Geoff are the perfect couple and don't have any problems, was foreshadowing that they would eventually have problems.
- Trent's confessional and Bradley's confessional both stating they 'have the worst luck', was intentional.
- Before the revamp, Cosmic River’s backstory was in chapter six. I changed that to this chapter, since I had more room and wanted DJ and Cosmic River to get better focus early on. Chapter six also felt cluttered to me.
- I changed the game Rhonda plays from Angry Birds to Flight Simulator, as a joke about her being a pilot, and to have less pop-culture references.
- In the revamp, I changed it so that Sierra was wearing the mermaid bathing suit, and didn't go into as much detail on it. I didn't want it to seem like Julie was that important to get so much focus, but wanted to establish her chest of costumes.
- Julie's reference to Paradise, is a reference to Total Drama: Paradise Beach. SG being there is a reference to the fact the user SG wrote the story.
- Julie saying 'Kthxbai' is a reference to Cammy.
- Rhonda's story about pyramids is just a joke about how the pyramids are the only really focused on things when Egypt is used as a location in fiction, despite being a pretty big place.
- I did completely steal this challenge idea from Survivor, as Mikey makes a joke about it.
- Julie’s songs are parodies of both Nicki Minjai’s Super Bass and the dub opening of Sailor Moon. There was a third song, a parody of Werid Al’s Perform This Way, but I cut it in the revamp, because it was too long and didn’t hold up as well.
- The challenge is probably the best example of me not using the exotic location in the story as best I could. In the revamp, I had Heather lampshade this.
- The idea for Jeopardy came from games of Jeopardy we'd play in science in middle school.
- While this wasn't the intention when I wrote it, Rosamond saying I get a sinister vibe from him...and not the good kind. I take as meaning she's saying he's evil, unlike some characters who are gothic, strange and or odd but are kind hearted (such as Rosamond for example). It was written with just the intention of being a joke however.
- Gwen’s comment for Heather ‘not to get her hair wet’ was a reference to the first episode, where Heather said she didn’t want to get her hair wet.
- Julie’s comment about Heather would name her kid after Gwen, is a reference to Legacy.
- Bridgette’s answer originally was her science teacher, but a history teacher would make more sense so I changed it to that. Her knowing the answer was meant to seem incredibly luck only for it to still end up wrong. Stupidly, before the reboot Bridgette did answer in the form of a question but still wasn’t counted as such.
- In the revamp, I changed Taylor and Jovi’s ending dialogue to better show character development between the two.
- Originally Taylor was going to be eliminated third, but her storyline was fleshed out a tiny bit, becoming involved with Trent, and Justin felt pretty expendable.
- As noted above, in an early draft Justin was on the Bulldogs. I don't remember what I was originally planning, but perhaps he worked with the Bradley and his alliance. He was going to be eliminated short of the merge, so perhaps he was backstabbed.
Chapter 5 Julie The Explorer
- During the revamp, I changed certain characters or events in the dream because some were of characters no longer on the wiki. I also tried to make it's humor rely less on references.
- The monsters Oweguy's characters transform into were all from Total Drama Sci-Fi Action, and a few of the transformations chosen were because those monsters were related to those specific characters.
- Anamaria's inclusion wasn't in the original, but was added as she felt like she'd fit right into this story, along with being one of my favorite comic relief characters ever.
- The lion in Rhonda's dream is a reference to Lion King.
- The place named Paradise in Rhonda's dream is the same place mentioned by Julie and SG last chapter and is another reference to Total Drama: Paradise Beach.
- Originally, the stock footage explosion first appeared in Jersey Shore. But in the revamp I introduced it here to make it a better running gag and it felt it fit here. Plus, it gave me a place to better explain the joke.
- Cammy originally appeared in the dream, but in the revamp I cut her out because I wasn't a fan of her character anymore.
- Vincent's description of his costume is lifted directly from Total Drama Revolution. The whole scene featuring them is based on my favorite chapter from that story.
- Jovi, Courtney and Rosamond’s scene wasn’t originally there before the revamp, instead having an apology from Jovi, but I felt that her saying sorry was a bit overdone and added the scene for a few reasons:
- I wanted a scene not focused on them talking about Nate, and instead show off their own characters. Particularly to highlight one of the biggest differences between Jovi and Courtney; Courtney is more cynical while Jovi is more optimistic.
- I was inspired to give Rosamond ‘powers’ from a scene in The Legend of Total Drama Island with Dawn, which I loved. I felt Rosamond’s peculiar nature was being lost, so this scene helped add to it.
- I also wanted to include foreshadowing for future events, which will be specified later, when they happen.
- Finally, I wanted to have some friendship moments early on between them, to better establish their friendship and because it was fun and cute <3
- Originally, Julie referenced FI and FC runs that were going on at the time of writing. This was to both say thanks and joke about them while making them work in the story. I dropped it in the reboot, as it felt too dated and odd.
- During the revamp, I changed the Bulldogs alliance scene. It originally discussed who they would vote off, but I felt that was established. I wanted to set up the Heather-Bradley-Lindsay love triangle and make it more clear that Bradley and Heather were partners, and realized I hadn't established them offically forming that, so I added it.
- Heather saying Bradley's nose "...is a little brown..." is her saying he's being a 'brown nose'.
- Chef saying that Lindsay didn't want to mix up sugar and salt is an allusion to The Legend of Total Drama Island.
- Heather's comment about Barbie's chocolate eating in the confessional was meant to be taken as mean in more than one way; Heather just arrived and was only there for a short while; she couldn't have known how much Barbie was eating.
- These are all the translations for the spanish statements in this chapter, whose definitions weren't given (according to Google Translate):
- Hablo español mal: I speak spanish badly.
- las vaquillas: heifers.
- Por favor, no me odian como los demás tienen: Please do not hate me as others have. (By others, Julie means her past loves, who are know to be abusive).
- Bueno: Good.
- SG's comment on the challenge was added in the revamp, lampshading how lame an idea that is in hindsight.
- The paths were kind of random, though in the revamp I added Jovi's logic on which path to take. This logic is based on a similar idea with paths in The Legend of Total Drama Island.
- This chapter features a featured quote of mine, Nellie Vs. Puma.
- The character of Dora, is an obvious parody of Dora The Explorer.
- During the revamp, I rewrote Julie and SG's discussion, making it longer. I felt the original was a little bit too personal for people who didn't know each other that long, and I wanted it to be more serious and slow. I researched signs of someone whose been emotional abused and tried to incorporate that slightly into Julie's dialogue.
- I added two scenes between Team Adamantine and The Bulldogs. I felt there was room and wanted to add wanted to give more focus and development to characters.
- I originally wanted Rosamond to have a bigger focus in the Team Adamantine scene, but I couldn't come up with something I liked.
- I hadn't originally planned for Joe to be so controling of Taylor, but given he was such a jerk I felt it him.
- Cosmic River's love interest (Rosy Moonbeam) was always planned to be mentioned, but later after DJ was eliminated. I wanted a bigger friend scene between Cosmic River and DJ and it'd make sense for Cosmic River to mention her to his biggest bud, so I added it in.
- Rosy Moonbeam originally had a different name, but I can't remain what it was so I made up her new one on the spot.
- Dora's crazy rant about wanting to kill Julie and SG was just thought of on whim, seeming like it'd be unexpected. The way Dora talked, while working on her show, seemed crazy, so I thought it'd be funny if she was actually crazy.
- Julie's ending speech upon leaving was edited a bit to try and show her feeling different emotions. I really wanted readers to be able to see Julie was a person and even crazy people feel things.
Chapter 6 Down Under
- The idea for most of these challenges came from an episode of one of my favorite old cartoons, Laff-a-Lympics.
Chapter 7 Jenny and Toby's Bogus Aftermath
- The original preview for this chapter was: It's the aftermath! Jenny and Toby host and do stuff. Former Total Drama contestants reveal what they've done, the eliminated contestants talk and answer fan questions, Rhonda is asked why she is such a creeper and some celebrities make guest appearances!
- Thanks to all the users who contributed suggestions, questions, ideas and other things for this chapter!
- Jenny and Toby originally came from a skit I wrote, though their personalities were slightly different.
- I wanted to do an aftermath because the aftermaths are a good idea when done right, which TDA didn't do well in my opinion. I also had some plot points that I needed an aftermath for, specifically plot points in this chapter.
- I didn't really want to mention Julie's recents wins as much and cut out several parts. This is because I didn't want to seem conceited. At the same time I was very excited for this to happen, and to wrote it to both celebrate and thank everyone who supported me.
- The various things yelled from the audience after Julie is announced are based on many different things;
- Derp was yelled because...I've heard that word alot.
- the thing about Direct to DVD Disney Sequels is because they are never good. EVER.
- Bloop Pork is Kavren's catchphrase from Total Drama Revolution.
- SNOOKI! is Elle's catchphrase, who is also from Total Drama Revolution.
- Doyce! is Doyce's catchphrase from a previous story here, called Total Drama Athletcis.
- I have no idea where I got the idea for “What Talking Obese Animal Would…”
- Girl Scout Troop 909 was added as some comedy relief, but I ended up liking them so much I gave them an expanded role in the series.
- I let the readers ask questions to give of sense of interaction and involvement. The idea was based on a former user here, Sprinklemist, letting the readers ask questions for his reunions.
- Eileen was originally going to die after crashing into the engine last chapter, but came back because a few people wanted to know what happened to her and Jenny and Toby. Since I didn't state she died, I decided to have her become a recurring character.
- The jokes about why the author takes forever to write aren’t real obviously.
- I had the old, non-returnees introduced to give some of them some closure and to have them referenced because they likely will serve some role in the future.
- The Purple Cupcake slogan was meant to be a hint to the contestants to pick the purple cupcake.
- Sadie originally receiving the purple cupcake, was a nod to who I would've chosen if not for the plot.
- I decided to use the purple cupcake idea to be something the readers could figure out would be important if they noticed the hints. I also wanted to have a way the characters returned while not directly stating it, but having it be established.
- The returns are probably the plot reasons I decided to have the Aftermaths.
Chapter 8 The New Three's Company
- The original preview for this chapter was: As conflicts arise and people are still grieving a certain elimination the contestants land in (I haven't thought of a place :/) With the promise of a double prize for the winners and a secondary prize for the second place team, the contestants try their hardest to the challenge. But an unexpected twist (well it might be expected) happens that proves to be a game changer.
- The name of this chapter is based on the twist that happens (three contestants returning/debuting). I came up with this chapter title after seeing it be said in an SNL with a woman (Lady Gaga), and two men (Justin Timberlake and Andy Samburg). I decided to name it this because it made laugh.
- I decided to open with Barbie's dream because I wanted to show Barbie's world, especially since she hasn't talked yet.
- Jenny hints at the purple cupcakes true meaning by calling them Chekhov's guns .
- Whitney Houston was originally going to jump out after Jenny but I didn't write for time constraints. This was for the best since Whitney died a bit after the chapter.
- Gideon asked a question to Nellie for the aftermath, but since Nellie wasn't being interviewed during the aftermath he suggested I could ask it on the aftermath anyway or during the competition. I choose competition because I didn't want to have Julie and Nellie see each other yet.
- I wasn't really sure how to answer Gideon's question, so I tried my best.
- Lindsay wasn't in first class just because I didn't want her ruining any interactions. I was going to have her show up in the cafeteria saying she was applying makeup but forgot to mention it.
- The tomato worm scene was thought of by Jay and many of the facts Cosmic River said Jay said, with a bit of hippy lingo added in. I extremely appreciate the great idea Jay :D!
- I had a different idea about how DJ would join but I couldn't find the notes for it. I decided almost poisoning the bunny and using DJ's mom as a big reason to join would be helpful, though it seems similar to an earlier scene.
- I think I was originally going to have Barbie give a reason that plan was fake, but forgot the reasoning, so it was changed.
- Chef says What The Heck when he sees Bradley poisoning the carrots.
- The Bridgette and Geoff problems story-line was planned to start with this chapter.
- I wasn't sure how to separate the two and decided the cooking would work, since it matched Geoff's cooking skills.
- Bridgette and Geoff not knowing much about each other is based on my opinion that the two's relationship is nothing more than making out.
- Courtney's former pen-pal (first mentioned in chapter 4) is mentioned for the second time.
- Rosamond screamed Hearken, a quote from Tell-Tale Heart by Edgar Allan Poe. This is to show some of her darker interests, which make her goth. I feel these are often forgotten so I tried to bring it up.
- The carvings on the table are never shown on camera or described in detail because they are extremely offensive. They say extremely hurtful things of Gwen, likely using cuss words and other inappropriate words, all not being appropriate for this show.
- When Sierra and Nellie look at Gwen eating and Sierra says it's too late late to stop the plan, this is because the two messed with the sandwich to make Gwen throw up which she later did. I forgot for Sierra to state this and I'll mention it next chapter.
- Raoul's pregnancy mentioned in the Inappropriate Movie 2 is based off something a kid said at my school.
- Heather's question about the curtains is why that I thought I might be asked so I had Chris not really give an answer. The real reason was so Team Indestructible would pick Nate instead of receive him. Also according to Sierra's logic, she wouldn't pick first cause first is the worst.
- I did costume solely so Chef could be Hilary Clinton and Nellie could be Sarah Palin.
- Heather's question about offended viewers was to show that I wasn't trying to be political or offensive in case any felt I was, though I doubt people do. This show isn't political :P
- Since Chris is likely from Canada, I portrayed him as not really caring and knowing much about American history.
- Geoff wasn't present to cause strain on Bridgette and Geoff's relationship for their storyline.
- I had Sierra mentioning be a third generation log roller because she would mention being a generation something in TDWT. Her confessional also hinted at Julie's return.
- Barbie and Duncan were paired together because they had no one else.
- Cosmic River quit because it was against his peaceful ways. Plot-wise, it was to make DJ see Cosmic River as a liability.
- Chris described the challenge as anti-climatic because it was anti-climatic. This was on purpose, so the challenge and chapter would be shorter.
- Sparkle Pony is a recurring character introduced this chapter. She is based off something I saw on Portlandia.
- The purple curtains were previously mentioned purposely for the comeback, though they didn't need to be. But it did add continuity.
- The order of who sits behind the curtains are the same as the three got their cupcakes.
- I had hinted about Julie returning in several comments and on blogs. On certain blogs I said something around the lines Julie might return with new company. This was to hint she would return this chapter, though it could have been taken that she would return with someone else, which is true.
- Julie wasn't always meant to comeback, or at least this soon. But due to her popularity and my enjoyment of writing her, I brought her back. It also brought her back because it seemed like the easy way to contiune her storyline.
- Cody was chosen to return for plot reasons. Nate was chosen for the same reason.
- Nate was mentioned so much to hint he would play an important role in the future.
- I debated about including Nate as I'm not sure how much he would be liked. I developed the character and made a stronger plot so I decided too.
- Julie saying she is bringing sexy back is an allusion to the song sexy back.
- Julie mentioned her outburst referencing her spanish was because I didn't want that fact to be ignored and be just convenient for that moment. I feel Total Drama (and other shows) do this with details sometimes.
- The reason the elimination didn't give any time to discuss was for plot. If we had time Duncan would prove his innocence and wouldn't have a reason to be targeted. And if the Bulldogs had time to talk, Cosmic River would have been convinced to vote for someone else than Heather.
- I had Bradley and Lindsay make-out to build drama between him, her and Heather.
- Rhonda mumbled about the two votes (plot-wise) so Heather would react. Rhonda was chosen to do it because with her conflict and knowledge it makes sense.
- Heather's reaction was an over reaction due to several factors. Her hatred of Barbie was one but the stress of doing fourth season (and losing two, and when she did win, get nothing) fueled it along with Heather's just angrier personality. It was also being in the final two and the pressure of elimination.
Chapter 9 The Situation Part 1
- The original preview for this chapter was: While some people try to be matchmakers, others have relationship problems. Things get worse when all of Jersey Shore has lost power and hallucinating chemicals are in the air. Jersey Shore is blocked away and the guidos and guidettes have gone crazy thanks to paranoia and the hallucinating chemicals of course. Worse Jenny and Toby are trapped in Jersey Shore! Now the contestants must enter and rescue the two. With Jenny and Toby each worth immunity (which means if you find both of them you win first-class and immunity for two challenges and the other teams each vote someone off) everyone races off. But things get crazy with the truth is revealed about a certain elimination, leadership debates and Nellie possibly being sucked into to a guidette's bottomless bottom forever! O-o
- Chapter 10 The Situation Part 2
- The original preview for this chapter was: Read the last episode preview. If you can't guess this is a second part of the last episode then you make me look smart. Thanks :D That was really mean, and I apologize for it.
- Originally the Fun Bunch were planned to get help from Anne Maria and another character in a collab I'm in, Gia. This was changed as I had other plans for canon season 4 characters and gave the girls scouts a bigger role.
Chapter 11 Bermuda Love Triangle
- This chapter was originally titled The Not So Wonderful Wizard Of Oz, but I changed it because the challenge no longer took place at Kanas where it was originally going to. So I changed it.
- When in Kanas, Sierra was suppose to be knocked out and dream were her teammates were in the Wizard Of Oz, and she would kind of realize how she was hurting Gwen, Mikey, SG and that Cody didn't love her. I changed the plot because the Wizard of Oz parody had been done, and nothing fun or exciting seemed to come in mind for a challenge in Kanas.
- Another title for this chapter was Waking Up In Vegas. The challenge was originally going to be about everyone be strapped to a big roulette wheel, and whoever was landed on had to compete. The idea was changed as it would take to long and I couldn't find a good way to introduce the saboteur in that challenge.
- Cap'n Sally is probably my favorite minor character so far. I just had a joy writing her dialogue, and it made me get into writing when I was having a really rough patch.
- the giant mantee called Manatee 12 is based on Manatee12. It was called Manatee9 but I changed it to Manatee 12, because I thought it'd funny to just do the full reference.
- The Whale, OHF, is based on an old joke that said user Owenandheatherfan was a whale. He was also described as Blaineley, which is why the whale is as well.
- The R.O.T.I. plot could be seen as beginning here. The idea for it was to reference the new fourth season that came, based on how this ended up being the fourth season.
- Sierra eliminating Mikey was to have her make what she would consider a mistake, as Mikey, SG and Gwen did.
Chapter 12 Elephant In The Room
- This chapter was originally titled The Last Straw...Oh Wait I Found Another. :O This Straw Is Bent! But I changed it because the chapter was named such for an event that happened but I changed when the event happened.
- Another title for this chapter was Jailhouse Rock, because the challenge related to escaping from jail. It was originally going to have a double elimination, but that plan was changed, so I had room for another chapter. I used this chapter to develop plot points and introduce important things. Its lampshaded a few times things have been building up.
- Texas Alexis is a clear parody of Disney Channel character Hannah Montana. Texas Alexis' product placement is based on a scene in the parody movie, Disater Movie.
- There was going to be another scene of Sierra and Nellie waiting, which would have featured Sierra performing a rap, that would have been awful. I dropped it at the last minute in favor of more time in other areas, and the scene didn't work like I wanted.
- Julie's speech while trying to revitalize SG is meant to be kind of serious, but is almost word for word this speech in the following scene of the Drawn Together Movie [warning extremely graphic ]
- DJ was originally going to make it slightly farther, though still be a merge out. He was bumped up because he was expendable, and his plot was more realizing his mistake, and how wanting to win for his mother, he was ignoring her lessons.
- DJ was originally going to be betrayed by Bradley and then discover how bad he was. DJ wasn't going to participate in a challenge because it involved hurting an animal.
- In an early, undeveloped draft, DJ made it farther, being out of the merge early on. I not sure why I thought this back then.