Total Drama Action is still dominating the ratings, after the first season showed off how awesome and dramatic the show can get, all ending with Webby's exciting win. Now, sixteen campers are returning to compete in the new season, taking on movie challenges to win a million bucks!


  • Chris McLean is the host.
  • Chef Hatchet is the chef.
  • Beth, Cody, Courtney, DJ, Duncan, Ezekiel, Heather, Gwen, Izzy, Justin, Lindsay, Owen, Sadie, Trent, Tyler and Webby are the contestants.


Chapter 1: Monster Cash

“Last time on Total Drama Island” said Chris, driving a bus. “Webby and Harold were in the final two and Courtney hurt her self. This old woman is rolling down a hill. Anyways, Webby somehow heard what I said and won the hundred grand. Anyways, this season now is about movie genres are fourteen of our fan favorites, excluding Harold, since nobody cares about him are returning now, for the million. Now, join us for the first episode of Total Drama Action!” said Chris, running over a stop sign. “Whoops” he winked.

(theme song plays)

“But then, Bitsy said that she didn’t want to watch that movie. So, we watched the space one with the cute little bananas eating monkeys, or was it monkeys eating bananas" said Lindsay.
“Hey, Lindsay. Let’s take this valuable time, by talking about another alliance” said Heather, smiling.
“Yaaay!” said Lindsay out loud.
“Quiet” said Heather. “The others are listening to every word we say” said Heather, whispering to Lindsay.
“Are you sure, silly?!” said Lindsay.

Lindsay walked to Tyler.
“Come back” whispered Heather.
“Did you hear what Hannah said to me?!” said Lindsay.
“No” said Tyler, admiring Lindsay’s looks.
“Uhhhh…” said Lindsay, turning.
“Wait!” said Tyler.
“Yes?” said Lindsay, turning around.
“I want to--I want to confess that” said Tyler. However, before he could finish the sentence, Chris honked the bus.

“About time” said Duncan. Gwen nodded.
“Come on the bus everyone!” said Chris. Everyone walked in.
“This place is sooo awesome! What are we doing first?! Horror, drama, romance?!” said Izzy.
“Slow down Izzy. You are spoiling all our fans” said Chris.
“Fans?! Is that the paparazzi?!” said Lindsay, clapping.
“Well, this place is abandoned, so there are no fans right now” said Chris.
Lindsay gasped.

“Right now, let’s talk about the bus rules! SAFETY!” said Chef, acting as tour guide.
“Chef, I told you. I don’t think we need safety. These kids are sixteen” said Chris.
“I am seventeen” said Duncan.
“Chip, remember when you said I was cue?!” said Lindsay.
“Cute?!” said Tyler.
“Tyson, I was asking Chris” said Lindsay.
“So, if there is a problem, I will yell stop this bus” said Chef.

“Let me test him” said Duncan, whispering to Coutney.
“Chef, we have a problem!” said Duncan.
“STOP THIS BUS!” yelled Chef.
Chris stopped the bus and everyone bumped on to the seats in front of them.
“Owie” said Lindsay
Tyler, who was across from Lindsay said, “It doesn’t look that bad”.
“Awww, thanks Tyson!” said Lindsay.
“Umm… it’s Tyler” said Tyler.
“Thanks Tyler!” said Lindsay.

“Aren’t you supposed to be in the craft services tent?!” asked Chris.
“Wait, that means there’s no more Mess Hall?!” said Gwen.
“Nope!” said Chris.
“Awww, I liked the pancake smell before I got eliminated” said Owen.
“Well, Chef finally learned how to cook, so now he is cooking… eggs and… other stuff” said Chris.
Everyone gasped and begun to talk to each other.

“Now, hush my children. Time for the tour!” said Chris, speeding.
A bird begun to fly above the bus. Chris closed the window on his bus, as everyone else got hit by it’s markings.
“Ewww” said Heather. Duncan laughed at Heather.
“Shut up, your mohawk looks worse than Chef’s food right now” said Heather, grinning.
“Did someone barf?!” ask Lindsay.
“AHEM!” said Chris, opening the windows again.

Chris passed the wild west set. “This is the awesome wild west set. We got it for less than New York in the 1600s or something!” said Chris.
“Good to know” said Gwen, rolling her eyes.
“Fine, ruin the good cheap moments!” said Chris.
Chris then passed the war set.
“And this is when--“ said Chris, before Izzy took over.

“I’ll go boom boom on Tyler and he’ll freak out and go near Lindsay and she’ll tell Heather that Tyler likes her and Tyler will hide, as Heather will try to beat him up and--“ said Izzy.
“Uhhh, not reeeeeeally” said Chris.

Chris drove past the Gilded Chris Ceremony.
“This is where I will be handing out Gilded Chris awards, replacing the good ol’ marshmallows” said Chris.
In the confessional, Gwen said: “Gilded Chris’, how lame. Don’t get me wrong. I still want one”.

“Put these sets and more together and you get, TOTAL DRAMA ACTION!” said Chris.
Chris stopped the bus at a stop.
“Now, before anything. Let’s just remember all the good times we had with good ol’ Camp Wawanakwa!” said Chris.
Everyone begun to laugh.
“Fine, ruin the moments!” said Chris.

In the new confessional, Justin said: “Woah, this place is better than I thought”.
Hands went by Justin. “Not the face” he said.
The hands powdered something on him. “Ohhhhhh, that’s the stuff!!” said Justin.
Trent looked around and saw big bites on buildings. “Uhh, was this like that when you got here?!” said Trent.
“Yes” Chris winked.

“Do you know what happened?!” said Trent.
“Yes” said Chris.
“Oooh, it’s story time!” said Sadie.
“There was a monster and--“ said Chris.
“Wow, I am out” said Duncan, walking away.
“And it ate the buildings after a movie. It went out of control and ate… Chef’s lunch!” said Chris, sniffling.
Sadie begun to cry. “Poor Chef” she said. Lindsay nodded.

“Stop crying. What good has Chef done to us in the past?!” asked Heather.
“Some things” said Sadie.
“Like?” said Heather.
“Cook… crappy food. You know what, I still feel bad for him though. That monster should get arrested for robbing food!” said Sadie, who stopped crying.
“Anyways, just get away from it, because it is still out there today!” said Chris, running off into a control panel.

“Wait, so he is making us stay here for dead?!” asked Tyler.
“No, he is making us stay here to run off!” said Heather, running away.
Lindsay ran next to her.
“This is a good moment for… Tyler!” said Tyler, running after Lindsay and Heather.

Trent and Gwen walked together.
In the confessional, Trent said: “Sometimes a dream girl needs someone to protect them!”
“Gwen, I’ll sacrifice myself if the monster goes near you” said Trent.
In the confessional, Gwen said: “Awww, how sweet?!” and blushed.

Chef controlled the monster.
Sadie went into the craft services tent and the monster put its hand in and went into the fridge. Terrified, Sadie held the fridge.
“Don’t take food!” she said, scared.
The monster closed the fridge and ate the food.
It reached down for Sadie and Chef walked the monster into a bounce house. Sadie bounced for a few minutes.
“That was almost as much fun as that tea party that we had nine years ago! EEEEEEEE!” said Sadie.

“Fangirl!” said Chef, rolling his eyes.
The monster walked around.
Justin was sitting in the beach, relaxing.
“The monster won’t dare to get me. I am just so hot, and I will look A+ for that new Tan magazine!” said Justin.
The monster saw Justin and Chef fainted.
Justin ran to the monster and stepped on it. “I, Brave Justin has saved everyone from that scary monster and there is no doubt on how I am not a hero!” said Justin.
The monster however got up and grabbed Justin.
Justin posed on the monster’s hand and the monster blushed. The monster let him go.
“Thank you” said Justin, walking away.
“DANG IT!” said Chef.

“Must need water” said Owen, panting.
“Come on Owen! I want to see all the studios!” said Izzy, running off.
The monster walked by and Izzy grabbed its leg.
“Izzy, come down! I thought we were going to see the studios!” said Owen.
“I know, but I am doing it faster and in a much cooler way!” said Izzy.
“Oh, can I join?!” asked Owen. “Sure!” said Izzy.
“Just make it on its leg before it’s too late!” said Izzy.
The monster walked away and Izzy said, “Don’t worry Owen, just follow us!”
Owen walked behind the monster.

The monster grabbed Webby and threw him in the bounce house.
“Woah, that was a close one!” said Owen.
The monster suddenly turned around and looked on the ground. It saw Owen.
“Didn’t see that coming!” said Owen.
The monster tried to get Owen.
“Argh. Boy’s too heavy!” said Chef, controlling the monster.

Over the loudspeaker, Chris said: “Owen, you’re out”.
“Awwww” said Owen.
Izzy then jumped off the monster. “Hai Owen!” she said.
The monster walked to Duncan, who then ran off. “Can’t catch me!” he said.
He bumped into Trent. “Move” he said.
Trent moved to the side and Duncan still ran off.
The monster grabbed Trent and threw him straight down into the bounce house.

Izzy then bit the monster. “OW!” yelled Chef.
“This challenge is going out of hand!” said Chris. Chef nodded.
Over the loudspeaker, Chris said: “Sadie, Trent, Webby and Owen have been caught”.

The monster stomped after Duncan and then finally got him in reach. The monster took Duncan and threw him hardly into the bounce house.
Courtney was walking around, taking off her band-aids. “Ouch!” she kept saying.
The monster listened for her and found her in the confessional.
In the confessional, Courtney said: “Ow! Ouch!”
The monster then reached for her and got her. Then, the monster walked to the bounce house and threw Courtney in.
“Ouch!” she said.

“Bounce houses are bouncy, genius” said Webby.
“Shut up! Nobody asked you” said Courtney, still pealing off her band-aids.
The monster walked away and reached for Beth.
The monster got her, hiding behind a lamppost.
The monster put Beth in the bounce house and she bounced.
“Hey! I actually wasn’t first!” she said.
Over the loudspeaker, Chris said: “Courtney, Duncan, Beth, Sadie, Trent, Webby and Owen are all caught. There’s only a few more people left, so the game is not over yet!”

The monster then saw Izzy running off. “Hahaha!” she said laughing.
She stopped running to catch her breath.
“What a workout?!” she said.
The monster then grabbed her and threw her in the bounce house. Izzy kept bouncing.
“Can you stop?!” asked Courtney, getting bounced near the wall and ground.
“But this is fun!” said Izzy.

In the confessional, Heather said: “I don’t need Lindsay right now, but I can get her, Tyler, Beth and Sadie in an alliance, of course if we are on the same team”.
Gwen continued to navigate her way around the set without Trent.
“I wish the monster didn’t catch Trent” she said.
The monster snuck up on Gwen and took her.
The monster dropped her in the bounce house.
She saw Trent and blushed.
In the confessional, Gwen said: “For the record, me and him are just friends. But he is kinda cute and nice”.

In the confessional, Trent played his guitar.
A freaked out DJ thought the challenge was over and came out of the trailer.
“It’s big boy DJ now. I can’t just hide under tables, I need to face my fears!” said DJ in the confessional.
The monster stomped its foot once.
“Mhm” said Chef, moving the monster to a cabin and stomping it.
“Woah” said Chris.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” screamed DJ, running in circles around the monster.

The monster tried to get DJ several times and finally got him.
“I got my luck still” said Chef.
The monster took DJ to the bounce house with DJ’s eyes closed and dropped him in there.
DJ screamed again.
“Stop with the screaming you teddy bear!” said Courtney, still removing a few band-aids from her knees.

“So, Lindsay, back there I was trying to say that I love you” said Tyler.
In the confessional, Heather said: “I love you?! Seriously?! Soon, they’ll break into their own alliance and eliminate me and everyone else one by one. I will not let that happen”.
“Awwwwww” said Lindsay.
“Oh, joy” said Heather.
“Heather, do you have a crush on anyone?!” said Tyler.
“None of your business, jock” said Heather.
“I bet she doesn’t want to admit it” winked Tyler.
"I said none of your business you jock!" said Heather.
"Jock?" said Tyler. "Yes" said Heather.

The monster took the bickering Heather and Tyler.
“Look what you did to us now!” said Heather, complaining.
“I? It’s also your fault, you know!” said Tyler.
“No, I didn’t start that relationship thing!” said Heather.
Tyler got dropped first and then, Heather got dropped.
“A bit easier next time, can’t you?!” said Heather.

“JUSTIN AND LINDSAY WIN THE CHALLENGE!” said Chris, over the loudspeaker.
“And that monster, you were scared of, DJ, Chef was controlling it!” said Chris, laughing.
“Don’t ever do that again, that freaked me out!” said DJ.

“Justin and Lindsay are going to pick teams in two days!” said Chris, out loud.
“Good!” said Justin, smiling and taking off his shirt.
“So hot” said Sadie. Beth nodded.
In the confessional, Heather said: “Perfect! I can get her to pick the people I want. It can be me, her, Beth and no loons like Tyler. Forget him”.

“Before we wrap this episode up” said Chris. “We are going to pick heads or tails! Guys and girls will pick either one and if it lands on your side, you get the regular trailer! If it doesn’t, you will get the smooshed one!” said Chris.
“Pick in ten seconds!” said Chris.
“Heads!” said Owen, for the guys.
“Tails!” said Lindsay, for the girls.
In the confessional, Izzy said: “Awww, I like heads, like head-butting. Haha!”
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “Do we wear tails, since I said that? I am so confused!”

The coin landed on tails.
“Girls get the regular trailer, as the guys will get the smooshed one. Haha! Good night!” said Chris, walking off.
Chef was busy building a new cabin for the guys.
“I hate this job!” he said.
In a few hours, the cabin was finished and the guys walked in. Everyone, soonly went to bed.
The monster roared and Chris woke up. “Can someone please put a wrap to that monster?!” said Chris, angrily.

Chapter 2: Alien Ressur-eggtion

“Last time on Total Drama Action” said Chris. “We announced the new season and a few challenges, including a monster one. In the end, Justin and Lindsay got to pick teams and they’ll pick in a few minutes on Total Drama ACTION!” Chris continued.

(theme song plays)

Everyone woke up and reported outside.
“Okay guys. Lindsay and Justin are going to pick the teams!” said Chris.
“Lindsay is going first, since she’s a girl and we are picking boy girl school yard fashion or girl boy” said Chris.
“I pick…” said Lindsay. “ME!” said Lindsay, smiling.
“EEEEEEEEEEEE”! said Sadie.
“Thank you, thank you!” said Lindsay.

“Ummm… are you a boy?!” asked Chris.
“Well, don’t tell anybody, but I somehow went into the boys bathroom one day, so I am technically a boy. Hi Blob!” said Lindsay.
“Ummm… she said Owen!” said Chris. Owen walked over to Lindsay’s side.

“Justin, you may pick a girl!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Justin said: “So many girls, so little pretty!”
“I pick… Gwen, I guess” said Justin. Gwen walked over to Justin’s side.
In the confessional, Gwen said: “I feel honored to be with Justin! Now, let’s just hope he picks Trent”.

“Lindsay, you may pick a girl!” said Chris.
Heather pointed at herself. “I want… Hannah on my team!” said Lindsay.
“Heather, you may go on Lindsay’s team” said Chris.
In the confessional, Heather said: “Now, she better pick Beth and Sadie, because I need an alliance!”
“Justin, pick a guy!” said Chris.
“I pick Duncan” said Justin.
In the confessional, Justin said: “Time to mix up the drama. After I left the first season, I learned how you can’t just smile and be nice anymore. You need to be serious and backstab people, start rumors and alliances. Maybe even… break up relationships. I will use my looks on the way to victory. I am here for the money and for the looks. There’s not a single girl here that’s pretty though”.

“Lindsay, pick a guy!” said Chris.
“Webby!” said Lindsay. “Bu-“ said Heather.
In the confessional, Heather said: “I don’t want that web kid on my team. I don’t care if he wins. If he screws up, my alliance will come into action!”
“Moving on” said Chris, as Webby passed him.
“Justin, pick a girl on your team” said Chris.
In the confessional, Justin said: “Almost all the remaining girls are loons!” “Uhh… Sadie” said Justin, sighing.

In the confessional, Sadie said: “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”
“EEE! EEE! EEEK!” she kept yelling.
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” she rolled on the ground.
“Ummm…” said Chris.
In the confessional, Sadie said: “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I am with my true love now, Justin! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”

In the confessional, Justin said: “I take picking Sadie back”.
“You may pick a girl!” said Chris to Lindsay. “PJ!” she said. “DJ is not a girl!” said Heather.
“Corny!” said Lindsay. “NO!” said Heather.
“Ummm… she said Beth!” said Heather. Beth walked over to Lindsay’s side.
“Be ready for a massive squeal!” said Heather.
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” said Lindsay and Beth.
“Hey, me and Katie make that noise also. That is soooo cool!” said Sadie.
“Yeah!” said Lindsay.
“Focus!” said Heather to Lindsay.

“Justin, pick a guy!” said Chris.
“I pick… Tyler!” said Justin.
In the confessional, Justin said: “We have a jock, a teddy bear and a person who plays a guitar. What do you pick?! The jock. It’s not a music competition, nor Halloween!”
Tyler sighed and walked to Justin’s side.
“Okay Lindsay. You can pick: Trent or DJ. Who will it be?!” said Chris.
“PJ!” said Lindsay, smiling.
In the confessional, Heather said: “Well, maybe I can get DJ in my alliance!”
In the confessional, Webby said: “Yes! Me and my two good pals, DJ and Owen are on the same team! This season is turning out better than I thought!”

“That means Trent is on Justin’s team!” said Chris
Trent walked to Justin’s team, as DJ walked to Lindsay’s team. Lindsay hugged DJ.
“Now, win these challenges!” she smiled.
In the confessional, Tyler said: “Do you think Lindsay is cheating on me? She just hugged DJ and I was right there watching. I thought she liked me”.
In the confessional, Gwen said: “Now, me and Trent are together on the same team. This is just great! Now, let’s hope they don’t eliminate him so early”.

“Now, Justin. This is your choice. You can pick psycho or ranter for your team” said Chris.
“I pick Courtney” said Justin.
In the confessional, Justin said: “Courtney actually listens to us and doesn’t go crazy. Also, I hate Izzy. Why do I always get stuck with the weirdest two?”

Courtney walked to Justin’s team, as Izzy ran to Lindsay’s team.
“OH MY GOD! We have the best people in our team. We are going to dominate in challenges! I cannot believe this! I am just so happy!” said Izzy, speed-talking.
“Save that if we are having a talking contest” said Heather.
“Yaaay! I got everyone I wanted!” said Lindsay.
“I got… nobody but you and Beth I wanted” said Heather, unhappy.
“I am so sorry Hannah! I will try harder next time” said Lindsay.
“Next time?! THERE WILL BE NO NEXT TIME!” yelled Heather
“Umm… Heather, don’t spazz out. It makes people die 5% inside” said Webby.
“Coming from an idiot like you” mumbled Heather.
“What?!” said Webby.
“Nothing” said Heather, smiling.

“Now, everyone follow me!” said Chris. Chris took everyone to studio two.
“Okay, you all are going to be hiding from Mama Alien, Chef. If he shots you with his paintball gun, you are OUT!” said Chris.
“But I have so much to earn for!” said Lindsay.
“Of the challenge” said Chris.
“What happens if you win?!” said Heather.
“If you win, your team gets immunity and the other team votes off one of their very own!” said Chris.
“Hmmm…” said Heather.

“Well, everyone has a minute to hide. GO!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Webby said: “Hide and seek, again?! How lame. The first time is fun. Because of the water. Now, there is no Harold, meaning no fun! Because I loved it when he got out and he complained”.
Chris pressed the alarm.
“That means one minute!” he said.

Owen walked around with Izzy and Webby.
“Don’t worry Big-O. Once Chef comes, I am going to take him down!” said Izzy.
Mama Alien suddenly appeared.
In the confessional, Webby said: “A wild Mama Alien has appeared”.
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “Awww… Chef is a mama! And I thought he was a Papa. I am not as dumb as you think”.
Mama Alien shot a paintball at Webby.
Webby dodged. “Ha!” said Webby.

Chef violently was about to shoot his paintball gun.
“Wait” said Chef. “Let’s set up a few rules. No face hitting, no fishie out of water, no godplaying and…” said Chef.
“No, paintball gun stealing?” asked Webby. Chef nodded.
“Okay, time in!” said Chef.
Chef shot paintballs at Owen. One hit him and Owen fell down.
“Big-O!” said Izzy. Izzy growled and ran to Chef.
She pulled a giant paintball gun from her pocket.
“Mhm. And that is some thing you have not seen!” said Izzy, shooting one at Chef.
“What did I say about face shooting?!” said Chef, on the ground.
“RUN!” said Izzy. Izzy and Webby ran in the boiler room.

Justin walked with his team.
“Let’s split up, so we won’t be caught all at once!” said Justin.
“Okay!” said Tyler. “I’ll go with Gwen” said Trent, smiling.
In the confessional, Justin said: “Those two have been doing a lot together. Something is up”.
“Okay” said Gwen.
Gwen and Trent walked up a ladder one by one to a different floor.

“Tyler, you can just wander off” said Justin.
In the confessional, Justin said: “No way Tyler is going to walk with someone. He’ll definitely lose for us!”
“Duncan and Courtney, go together!” said Justin.
In the confessional, Duncan said: “WHAT did he say? I am not going to do this challenge with a psycho!”
In the confessional, Courtney said: “Time to take this valuable time with Duncan on how to improve our relationship, by starting one big thing, an alliance!”

“I’ll go with Sadie” said Justin.
“EE-“ said Sadie, before Justin said, “Shush. Its listening”.
In the control panel, Chris said: “Chef, an it? Haha! Wait until he watches this! But not before Survivor”.
Justin and Sadie walked to a quiet place. Mama Alien got up and walked around.
“Okay Sadie. I am using this time to invite you to an…” said Justin.
In the confessional, Justin said: “I’ll regret doing this”.
“Alliance” said Justin, holding his ears and sighing.

In the confessional, Sadie said: “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”
“EEE! EEE! EEEK!” she kept yelling.
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” she rolled on the ground, until Mama Chef shot a paintball at her stomach.
“Ow!” cried Sadie.

“Umm… I’ll get you later!” said Justin, running off.
“Come back here pretty!” said Chef, chasing Justin.
Justin ran up the ladder and saw Trent and Gwen.
“This is not turning out good!” said Justin.
Chef shot three paintballs at Gwen, Trent and Justin, all getting them.
“Nooooooooooooooooo!” said Justin.
In the confessional, Justin asked: “Does green match me?! Either way, Duncan better win this challenge, because he’s my last hope. I can get four out of seven to just eliminate him!”

Chef walked into the boiler room and changed a few settings.
“Have a green day!” Chef winked, holding up an umbrella.
Soon, green slime came from the air.
In the confessional, Heather said: “My hair is… GREEN! I am not doing this. I need to wash off!”
“Woah!” said Chris in the control panel. Izzy, Webby and Duncan were left in the game.

Chef looked around in the boiler room for Webby and Izzy.
Izzy whispered to Webby, “Leave and look for Duncan”.
Webby nodded and left.
“AHA!” said Chef, opening the door and seeing Webby.
He shot at Webby and hit him. Webby fell down
“Ow. That really hurt. Why do you do things like that? Ow. It is so dangerous and… ow. This was even worse than that time when I… ow!” said Webby.
“Hey Webby” said Owen on the ground.
“How was your day?” said Webby.

Chef looked for Duncan. He looked up on each floor.
“Okay. So, he must be in the boiler room with crazy!” said Chef, jumping down off all of those flights.
He ran into the boiler room and shot Duncan, who tried to use Izzy to defend him.
“You’re out!” said Chef.
Over the loudspeaker, Chris said: “I finally thought of names for your teams. Lindsay’s team is called the Screaming Gaffers and Justin’s team is called the Killer Grips. Now, the winner is Izzy and the Screaming Gaffers. The Grips have eliminate someone now. You have fifty minutes for your vote”!

Justin found Sadie and took her into the craft services tent.
In the confessional, Sadie said: “Does he want to have dinner with me?! That will be so awesome. I hope he does!"
“Come here Tyler” said Justin, taking off his shirt.
In the confessional, Justin said: “Duncan may be good, but he just lost a valuable challenge for us and he hates almost everyone in the team, so he’ll do no good”.
Trent and Gwen then joined the discussion.
“I need everyone one of you to eliminate Duncan” said Justin.

“Why?” asked Gwen. “Isn’t he a cool guy?” said Trent. Gwen nodded.
“He lost the challenge for us and hates almost everyone of us in our team!” said Justin.
“He does?” asked Gwen. “Yes” said Justin.
“And he also made it far in season one. None of us, but Duncan and Courtney made it far!” Justin continued.
“You have a point there” said Trent.
“I guess I can vote for him!” said Gwen. “Same” said Trent.
“You got my vote” said Tyler.
“Of course you have myyyy vote” said Sadie.
“Good!” said Justin.

In the Gilded Chris location, Chris said: “These are the voting devices you will be using for the rest of the season, as long as you are playing. Pick a face here to eliminate, okay?! I’ll record all the votes!”
A few minutes later, the votes were in.
“Well, all but two votes were toward someone!” said Chris, reading the results list from the new gadgets.

“The first Gilded Chris of season two goes to… Gwen!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Gwen said: “First Gilded Chris. I am happy I got one, well, not really. Well, I am actually. But that is so awesome!”
Gwen got her Gilded Chris and sat down.
“The next two goes to… Sadie and… Tyler!” said Chris, handing them each a Gilded Chris.
“Trent, you are safe too!” said Chris, giving him a Gilded Chris also.

“Three people left. Two Gilded Chris’!” said Chris.
“The next Gilded Chris goes to Courtney!” said Chris, handing Courtney a Chris.
In the confessional, Courtney said: “Duncan better not go or else the voting is rigged!”
“Duncan, Justin, this is the final Gilded Chris. It will go to…” said Chris, starting all the drama.

“JUSTIN!” said Chris, handing Justin the final Gilded Chris.
Justin smiled.
“Good bye Duncan” sighed Gwen.
Duncan muttered some bad words and went in the Lame-o-Sine.
“That is not good sportsmanship!” said Chris.
Justin grinned in the confessional.
The lame-o-sine took off.

In the confessional, Courtney opened a package, which had a PDA in it.
“Be ready for a lawsuit. You are going to return Duncan. Even if it kills me!” said Courtney.

Chapter 3: Riot on Set

“Last time on Total Drama Action” said Chris. “We picked the awesome teams and we did an alien challenge. Chef went so hard on everyone. Even Heather got soaked. In the end, Izzy won the challenge for the Gaffers, as Duncan got sent home in Total Drama ACTION!” Chris continued.

(theme song plays)

Lindsay and Courtney woke up.
“Good morning Corny” said Lindsay.
Courtney mumbled, “Good morning”.
“Why so sad?” said Lindsay. “I am not sad!” said Courtney.
“Why are you unhappy?!” said Lindsay.
“Dumb team voted Duncan off” said Courtney.
“PUNKIN?!” Lindsay gasped.
“No, Duncan!” said Courtney.
“I don’t know him…” said Lindsay.

Everyone woke up and reported outside.
“Good morning everybodah!” said Chris.
“Stop with that Simpsons accent” said Webby. DJ nodded.
“Fine, because today is an acting challenge!” said Chris.
Webby gasped. In the confessional, Webby said: “I don’t act”.
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “YES! A fact challenge, I am going to win this challenge!”

“First, you have to take these trailers up a giant hill. Then, you need to make a scene. Best scene wins!” said Chris.
Chris showed everyone the two trailers.
“Owen, take us on top of that hill!” said Izzy. Owen nodded and took down his pants.
“Time to strap on!” said Owen.
“Couldn’t you have done that when we were looking away?!” said Heather.
“Didn’t think of it before!” said Owen, strapping the trailer and running up the hill.

“Okay, we need someone… not me, who needs to carry the trailer up the hill… not me. Okay?!” said Justin.
“I am busy with my PDA. Get someone else” said Courtney.
Justin stared at Sadie.

Sadie begun to carry the trailer up the hill, slowly.
“Can’t you pull faster?!” said Justin.
“I am trying!” said the sweaty Sadie.
“Ewww, sweat. Can’t go near you for about twenty-six minutes-three hours” said Justin, walking up the hill. Tyler begun to pay attention to the Gaffers.
“Owen is half way up!” said Chris. “But he is losing control of his pants…” said Chris.
“OWEN!” said Heather.
“I can’t stop” said Owen.
“Oh yes you can. That is really gross” said Heather, looking away.
“Well, can someone help me?!” said Owen, stopping.
A cricket chirped.
“The faster you get up the hill, the faster you can pull your pants up and win the challenge!” said Heather. Webby nodded.

“No Hannah. I think he should do it here. I don’t like what I am seeing!” said Lindsay.
“No” said Heather. “Pleeeeeeaaaaaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!” said Lindsay.
“Fine” said Heather.
Owen stopped and pulled his pants up, as the trailer went down the hill.
Beth began to run away from it.
“HELP ME!” said Beth.
In the confessional, Beth had a cast on. “I thought someone… was going to save the… day. Someone like… Justin” she said.

“We have an advantage! Hurry up Sadie!” said Courtney.
“You try… moving this trailer” said Sadie.
“Fine” said Courtney, putting her PDA in her pocket and taking it up the hill.
Before you know it, Courtney and the Grips’ trailer was up the hill.
“The Grips have an advantage for this part of the challenge, find an actor and read the script!” said Chris.
Owen begun to go up the hill again with the Gaffers’ trailer. Owen’s pants fell down again.
“Hannah, ignore it” said Lindsay.
“But it’s just gross. Owen, stop and pull your pants up” said Heather.
“NO! We are going to lose the challenge!” said Lindsay.
“Tough luck for you Lindsay. I am here to win the challenge” said Heather.
“Heather has a point” said Owen.

The Grips put down chairs. “Okay, now, let’s get cozy and begin the challenge” said Courtney.
“I nominate… Tyler to do the challenge” she continued.
“I actually want you to do it” said Justin.
In the confessional, Justin said: “Has she read the script? She’ll be perfect!”
“I am not a bossy person!” said Courtney, reading the script.
“Yes, you are” said Justin.
“How rude?!” complained Courtney.
“I am not bossy either” said Tyler.
“You know what?! Let’s vote on this. If you want Tyler to do the script, raise your hand!” said Courtney.

She was the only one to raise her hand. She growled.
“I TOLD YOU ALL TO VOTE TYLER!” said Courtney.
“Bossy, much?!” said Tyler.
Courtney blushed. “Fine, I’ll do the dumb role, but you all better not vote me off tonight if we lose” said Courtney.
“Fine” said Justin.
In the confessional, Justin said: “I have a good alliance right now, so I can pick off whoever I want, whenever I want”.

Owen finally got the trailer up and pulled up his pants.
Heather read the script and laughed.
“We need two people, I say Lindsay and Beth” said Heather.
“What is it about?!” said Beth.
“A farmer… raising a cow!” said Heather laughing her head off.
“I know how to do crops! There’s a lot of weeds in my garden!” said Lindsay.
“Uhhhh… okay” said Heather.

“Along with Courtney, we need a guy that is friends with everyone” said Justin.
Trent raised his hand.
“Okay, so it’ll be Courtney and Trent for us!” said Justin.
In the confessional, Trent said: “I should just give Courtney her PDA”.
“If you want to win, give me the PDA” said Trent.
“Why? You may just mess it up!” said Courtney.
“Trust me” said Trent. “I am friends to everyone, remember?!” Trent continued.
Courtney sighed and gave Trent her PDA.
“If it breaks, I won’t buy a new one with my own money” said Courtney.
In the confessional, Trent said: “I’ll be extra perfect with this. Ooh, a song manager. This looks cool”.
Trent adjusted and played around with the PDA.

Lindsay wore an old red shirt that was torn.
Beth however, wore a black and white shirt with a nose shaped like a pig’s.
Courtney wore her regular clothing. “Okay” said Chris. “Read the scripts!” he continued.
“First… the Grips!” said Chris.

Courtney reached for her pocket.
“Who took my PDA?!” she said.
“The scripts! The scripts!” Tyler whispered.
“Shut up” whispered Courtney. Trent walked around.
“Hey, is that MY PDA?!” asked Courtney.
“No, duh! I found this on the floor” said Trent.
“Give me that!” said Courtney.
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “Oh my goodness! Trent took Corny’s DAP! What’s a DAP anyways? Does it stand for Dramatic Apple Player?!”.
Courtney looked around the PDA.
“Aha!” said Courtney pointed to her name.
In the confessional, Trent said: “Courtney Buckert. Weird name”.

She snatched the PDA away from Trent.
“Now, excuse me. I need to… what happened to my contacts, lists and everything?” said Courtney.
In the confessional, Courtney said: “I knew I couldn’t have trust Trent. He doesn’t know how to work these things. Now, I lost EVERYTHING!”
Music then turned out.
“Baby, by Justin Bieber? Who listens to this?!” said Courtney, listening to the song.
In the confessional, Tyler complained: “Why don’t they just read the scripts?!”

Trent pointed at Sadie, who blushed.
Chris begun to chuckle.
“Now, how do you delete this?” said Courtney.
In the confessional, Courtney asked: “Did he just remove the delete button?!” She stopped Baby and suddenly, another Justin Beiber song turned on, Love Me.
In the confessional, Justin said: “That Justin is a girl. He isn’t as pretty as me. I even have better songs!”

“Done” said Courtney, unhappy as can be.
“I’ll give you the rating after the Gaffers” said Chris, still chuckling.
In the confessional, Courtney said: “I finally undeleted everything, but now Baby is stuck in my head!”
In the confessional, Justin sung: “I cry like a baby, crybaby, crybaby, OH!”
Lindsay then said, “What do I do?!” Webby facepalmed.

“What a long day?!” said Lindsay, milking the crops.
“No Lindsay. Water!” whispered Heather.
“I CAN’T HEAR YOU HANNAH!” said Lindsay. Heather facepalmed.
“Now, let me milk my cow friend” said Lindsay.
“Milk the what?!” said Webby, fainting.
“Beth, the cow over there!” said Lindsay, pointing at Beth. Beth gasped.
Lindsay walked closer to Beth.
“Time to milk the cow” said Lindsay.
In the confessional, Owen said: “My eyes are sizzling as bacon! Yum… bacon!”
In the confessional, Izzy said: “That was gross, but actually kinda funny if you keep watching that over and over again. No, just kidding. My bear joke beat that by so much!”
Beth passed out. “And now, time to bury the cow!” said Lindsay.

In the confessional, DJ said: “Bury the cow?! But it did nothing but get… well, grossed out!”
Lindsay dug a hole by the other plants.
“You are seriously going to bury her?!” whispered Heather.
Lindsay nodded.
“Rest in peace, Beth” said Heather.
Lindsay pushed Beth.
“You know this is pretend, you know?!” said Beth.
“OH MY STARS! THE COW IS ALIVE!” said Lindsay.
“Moo” said Beth.
“Wait, it’s an zombie! Hide from the cow!” said Lindsay, running down the hill and into the girls trailer.
“Well, that went better than expected” said Beth.
Heather said, “I think you just costed us this challenge”.
“Heather, you are right” said Chris.

“I am going to rate the Gaffers a solid one, because that was a really gross experience that almost made me barf my guts up!” said Chris.
“The Grips get an eight, because their performance was weird, but also really funny. It made me have a few epic win moments inside” Chris continued.
“I deem the Grips the winners of immunity for the challenge!” said Chris.
“YES” said the Grips.
Gwen and Trent high-fived each other.
The Grips, then walked down the hill.

“Gaffers, what can I say?! You guys lost brutally. Now, you got to eliminate someone. I’ll see you tonight in the Gilded Chris ceremony!” said Chris.
“This is what happens if someone… Beth and Lindsay… screws up!” said Heather.
“Don’t just blame us. You should’ve stopped us from doing these roles!” said Beth.
“Get real” said Heather, walking away down the hill with the rest of the team, leaving Beth alone, by herself.

A few hours later, all the votes were cast.
“If you do not receive a Gilded Chris, you’ll be eliminated” said Chris in the Gilded Chris ceremony.
“The first Gilded Chris goes to… Izzy!” said Chris, passing Izzy a Gilded Chris.
Izzy stuffed it in her face.
“So good! This was even better than that special chocolate I stole from that school fair a few years ago. I still have them in my old pants! Want some anyone?!” said Izzy.
“I may want some” said Owen.
“Cool, the school security guard is still looking for me though, so watch out!” said Izzy.
The security guard, who was watching the show made an evil and angry face.

“Okay… the next Gilded Chris goes to Owen, who will probably stuff it down his face also!” said Chris.
Owen got his Gilded Chris and nodded. Then, he stuffed it down.
“Izzy, you are right. Can you give one to me for breakfast?!” asked Owen.
“Sorry Owen, but no” said Chris.
“Awwww” said Owen.
“The next Gilded Chris goes to Heather!” said Chris, handing Heather one.
“Thank you” said Heather, waving at Beth and Lindsay.
In the confessional, Heather said: “For the record, I am giving Beth one more chance in my alliance. If she screws up this time however, she is out!”

“Our next Gilded Chris goes to DJ!” said Chris.
DJ received it and walked back to his seat.
“Three people left, two Gilded Chris left” said Chris.
“Our second to last Gilded Chris goes to Lindsay!” said Chris.
Lindsay walked over and got her Chris. Then, he ate it.
“Okay, now Beth and Webby. One of you won’t get this final Gilded Chris to keep you in the game. Webby, you will still get the money from last season if you get the elimination. Before anything, both of you racked up a lot of votes, but one of you got one more than the other” said Chris.
Webby sighed.
“The final Gilded Chris goes to…” said Chris, starting the drama.

“Webby!” said Chris, ending the drama. Webby walked up and got his Gilded Chris.
“Beth, you have been eliminated” said Heather.
In the confessional, Heather said: “Now, we have to play the hard way. It’s now only two people in this alliance and we need more”.
“Good bye guys. I guess I didn’t do well in the acting challenge” said Beth.
In the confessional, Webby said: “Beth didn’t do bad. However, Lindsay did. The bubbly ways of Lindsay has to stay to get control of her as captain on the team, as Beth will try to defend her”.

In the confessional, DJ said: “I feel bad voting Beth off, but everyone on this team is my friend. I don’t see anything wrong with Heather though. She may be a bit mean, but I don’t think she really is”.
“Good bye Total Drama Action” said Beth, in the lame-o-sine.
The lame-o-sine took off. Lindsay begun to cry.
"Good bye Beth. I am sorry that I screwed up on you" said Lindsay.
In the confessional, Owen said: "I feel a bit bad inside now. Before, I thought it was a get it over with vote, but now I feel like this will effect the team".

Lindsay cried, as Heather walked away.
In the confessional, Heather said: "She can cry all she wants. If she does that, I'll just make a new alliance with someone more smarter than her".
“Join us next time for more Total Drama ACTION!” said Chris, ending the episode.

Chapter 4: Beach Blanket Bogus

“Last time on Total Drama Action” said Chris.
“Both teams acted a scene. One was pretty funny, but had two weird songs, as the other one was just plan gross. Anyways, it came down to Beth and Webby. Webby got the final Gilded Chris of the night, as Beth took the trip to… the Aftermath studio. Now, it is the final twelve here on Total Drama ACTION!” said Chris.

(theme song plays)

Outside, it was hot. Chris woke up and turned on the air conditioner.
“So good!” he said.
In the boys trailer, Owen farted.
In the confessional, Owen said: “Okay, I fart when its hot outside”.
Tyler woke up and said, “What was that horrible smell?”
Owen pointed at his butt.
“Disgusting” he said. Justin woke up and said, “What is that smell? It better go away fast or else my special face cream that keeps my face so smooth will melt”.
Owen reached to touch Justin’s face.
Justin pushed away Owen’s hand. “You are not touching my face” said Justin, smoothing his face.

Chris walked outside and blew a horn.
Everyone woke up and walked outside.
“It’s so hot” said Chris, holding up a fan by his face.
”Mhm” said Sadie, winking at Justin.
“Not that kind of hot” said Chris to Sadie.
“Oh” said Sadie.
“Yesterday, we spend some money and got an extra studio” said Chris.
“Well, how is that important?” said Gwen.
“It’s important, because we knew today was going to be a hot day” said Chris.
“You did?!” said DJ.
“Not really, it’s for today’s challenge” said Chris.

“Follow me” said Chris, walking into the studio.
“Today’s challenge is a beach movie” said Chris.
“If today is a beach movie, why is it frozen in here?” said Gwen.
Webby nodded.
“Wait, so are you saying that we are going to spend the day in the cold almost like my Aunt Arctica?” said Lindsay.
“Antarctica” said Chris, rolling his eyes.
“Just change into your swimsuits and come back!” said Chris.

Minutes later, everyone returned with their swimsuits.
“Okay” said Chris.
“Today, we are going to be surfing! Whoever stays in the surfboard the longest wins!” Chris continued.
“Well, that’s easy” said Gwen.
“Owen, my man! You can go first” said Chris, sitting back and relaxing by the fan.
Owen got on the surfboard and fell in the water.
“A second” said Chris.
In the confessional, Owen said: “I am probably going home, because I lasted a second on the surfboard. Maybe my team will understand how my I like cake and stuff that I forgot to do surfing lessons”.
In the confessional, Heather said: “I don’t understand how it only took him a second to just fall in. Chubby McFartface is going home if we lose”.

“Next is Trent!” said Chris.
“Go Trent!” cheered Lindsay.
“He’s not in our team” said Webby.
“He’s not?!” “No, he’s not”.
Lindsay threw tomatoes at Trent.
“What are you doing?” said Gwen.
“He’s not in my team!” said Lindsay.
Gwen sighed.
“Okay, Trent. Get on the surfboard and begin!” said Chris.
“Okay” said Trent, getting on.
Lindsay pelted tomatoes at Trent still.
Trent slipped and fell off.
“Yay!” said Lindsay.
“Four seconds, you guys suck” said Chris.

“Next is… Webby!” said Chris.
Webby got on the surfboard and stay on for a few seconds.
“This is just too easy!” said Webby.
A shark appeared and Webby jumped off the surfboard.
“Did I mention sharks?” winked Chris.
Webby nodded no. “Well, now you do” Chris winked again.
“This was even scarier than that time when Fred Fred Burger came to my house” said Webby, before a flashback.
“Your name is Webby? My name is Fred Fred Burger and this is how you spell it… F. R. E. D. F. R. E. D. B. U. R… G. E… R! FRED FRED BURGER YES! Now, I have to go bathroom. Where is the bathroom?” said Fred Fred Burger.

“Uhh… okay. Either way, that was twenty nine seconds!” said Chris.
“Awesome!” said Webby.
“Next is Justin” said Chris.
“I am sorry team. But I cannot do this challenge. I have a contract and if I surf and get hurt, no magazines will have interviews or reports on me. I may lose everything I have” said Justin.
“Well, no seconds for Justin, because he won’t get on” said Chris.
“Next… Lindsay!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Webby said: “We are so losing this challenge”.

“What do we do?” asked Lindsay.
“You get on the surfboard” said Chris.
Lindsay got on the surfboard.
“Now, do people sign my arms?” said Lindsay.
“Ummm… you got to survive the fish!” said Chris, throwing fish at the surfboard.
“That’ll be my hair look awful and make me smell awful too” said Lindsay.
Lindsay jumped off the surfboard and said, “Where is the shampoo?”
“You should’ve brought some over the summer” winked Chris.
“Do you have some?” asked Lindsay.
“Yes, but I won’t share. It’s mine for my special hair” said Chris.
“Okay, but no more fish, okay?!” said Lindsay.

Ignoring that, Chris said: “Sadie, you are up!”
Sadie got on the surfboard and begun to jump.
Then, she began to squeal “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”
The sharks stayed down, since they were scared.
“EEEEEEE! YAY! EEE! EEE!” said Sadie.
Chris threw a fish at Sadie and she fell in the water.
“I am alive!” she said, once she got back up and out of the water.
“Fifty nine seconds, that is a keeper right now!” said Chris.

In the confessional, Sadie said: “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”
“EEE! EEE! EEEK!” she kept yelling.
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” she rolled on the hot ground.
“Ow, my back hurts” said Sadie.
“Your mouth should hurt too” said Heather, rolling her eyes.
In the confessional, Sadie said: “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I have the record right now! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”

“Izzy, you are up!” said Chris.
“Oh my goodness. I couldn’t have wait for this much longer. I am so excited. I am going to win Screaming Gaffers!” said Izzy.
“Yay Izzy!” said Lindsay, smiling.
Izzy ran to the surfboard and Chris said, “Go!”
Izzy moved to the left and moved to the right.
Then, she did a few flips. “This is not a gymnastic contest, Izzy” said Chris.
In the confessional, Chris said: “I am not going to do any lawsuits if she gets injured or hurt”.
“I know, but this is fun and AWESOME!” said Izzy.
Chris sighed. “Alright” he said, throwing eggs at Izzy.
Izzy stepped on one. “Ooh! Not a chick egg! A food egg!” said Izzy, gobbling one down.
“Umm…” said Lindsay.
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “I might not be the smartest one here, but I know you shouldn’t eat raw eggs”.

Izzy jumped about some more and passed out.
“Izzy is still in, because she is still on the surfboard!” said Chris.
“But, she is clearly passed out” said Courtney.
“But I don’t care!” said Chris.
“You know what?!” said Courtney, lifting Izzy up and taking her out of the water.
“Now, she’s not on the surfboard!” said Courtney. “Who knows how to do CPR?!” said Trent, concerned.
“I do” winked Owen.

Owen kneeled down to Izzy’s lips.
In the confessional, Owen said: “Hubba hubba”!
Owen kissed Izzy.
Izzy woke up and said, “Oh my god! That is so awesome! I got a kiss, jumped on the surfboard, ate eggs and I lost my cramp. How can this day get any better?!”
“You are on American Idol!” smiled Chris.
“I AM?!” said Izzy.
“No, just kidding. But you have the lead with two minutes and eight seconds!” said Chris.

In the confessional, Tyler said: “I think I am Lindsay’s idol”.
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “I love immunity idols and failure idols and guess who is my idol?! That person from Skylight, who turned into a bat or something!”
“Next is… the jock himself, Tyler!” said Chris.
Tyler got on the surfboard.
A shark bit the surfboard in half.
“Six seconds” sighed Chris.
Chef replaced the surfboard.
“Tea break!” said Chris.
“Awesome!” said Owen.
“For the sharks and Chef” winked Chris, drinking some coffee.
“Next is… DJ” said Chris.
“I can’t do it” cried DJ.
“Scared?” said Chris.
“Mhm. Scared of sharks” said DJ.
“Okay” said Chris.
“My lawyers have told me that it is unsafe to do this challenge, so I will not die while doing this” said Courtney.
“Fine with me” said Chris.

“We have Heather and Gwen left. This is going to be a big brawl” said Chris.
The two rivals looked at each other.
“I’ll go first” said Gwen.
“Go!” said Chris, shooting turtles at Gwen.
Gwen dodged a few and got in the face by one.
“Ow” she said, trying to take the turtle off.
Another one was shot at her leg.
“Ow” said Gwen, hopping around.
“Fall off already” said Chris.
Owen farted loudly, making the surfboard fall.
“Well, unless Heather wins, which will be unlikely, Gwen has the time to win! Two minutes and thirty six seconds!”
said Chris. “Nice!” said Gwen, high-fiving Trent.
In the confessional, Justin said: “There’s that alliance thing I see again”.

Heather got on the surfboard and Chris threw stuff at her hair.
“EW! I am out of there!” said Heather.
“You are kidding me, right?” said Webby.
“No” said Heather, walking off the surfboard.
“The Grips win part one of the challenge!” said Chris.
“YES!” they said.
“Change and come back to the studio in fifty!” said Chris.
Fifty minutes later, Chris said: “Let’s go outside and have a good ol’ sandcastle building contest. You may use anything you see in the beach!”

Everyone followed Chris.
“Okay! Let’s begin!” said Chris.
The Grips begun to make a good sandcastle, led by Heather.
“There, no, there. Stop touching me! There, fly there birdie! Take that bottle, crab’s shell. Seashells!” said Heather.
“Patty pick sheashells on the shore of the sea, kisslmnop!” said Lindsay.
“That made no sense” said Webby.
“No, it does. Patty picked sheashells on the shore of the sea and kissed in a tree!” said Lindsay.
“Look at their sandcastle!” said Courtney.
“It’s better than our’s!” she said.
“It is. Should we distract them and destroy it?!” asked Justin.
“I like that idea” said Courtney, walking over. “You guys finish, okay?!” said Courtney.

“Twenty minutes down, ten minutes to go!” said Chris.
“Hello Grips!” said Courtney.
“CORNY!” said Lindsay.
“Hannah, Hannah. Look! It’s Corny!” said Lindsay.
“What are you doing here?” said Heather.
“Just checking on you guys” said Courtney.
“What a nice sandcastle!” she said.
“Thanks Corny!” said Lindsay.
“You’re welcome!” said Courtney.
“Can I have a small tour?!” said Courtney.
“No” said Heather.
“Yes!” said Lindsay. “This is the bottle place thing!” said Lindsay,
walking around the sandcastle. Courtney purposely tripped on the bottle and fell into the sandcastle.
“Whoops” she said. “CORNY!” said Lindsay.
“Courtney!” growled Heather.
Owen, eating sand said, “What happened?”

“Five minutes!” said Chris.
“We need to rebuild it fast!” said Heather.
“No more tours. The Big Castle is closed!” said Lindsay.
“Okay” said Courtney, walking back to her team.
“I wrecked their sand castle!” said Courtney.
“Birds wrecked ours!” said Sadie.
“If that something wrecks the sandcastle again, I am going to bring the dinner to the table and then I am going to… wash my hands, eat, thank the cook for the meal, brush my teeth, sing something and go to bed, but not before…” said Tyler.
“Shut your piehole!” said Courtney.
“No, you shut your piehole!” said Tyler.
Chef, walking by said: “Both of you shut your dirty pieholes, before I make you clean my dishes after a slug fest!”
Courtney and Tyler shut up.

“Time is up!” said Chris.
“That was fast” said Courtney.
“Because you were busy talking and telling Tyler to shut up. Oohh, look at the Gaffers’ sandcastle. It looks fantastic!” said Chris.
“Thank you” smiled Heather. “I love the Big Lindsay 2!” said Lindsay.
Chris walked to the Grips’ sandcastle and said, “This is the worst sandcastle I have seen.
It’s like you all did nothing.
It looked like the same thing when we got here!”.
“I deem a tiebreaker, since the Gaffers won this challenge!” announced Chris.

“Let’s have a Dorky, Nerdy, Cool, Fun, Butt Shaking, LeShawna-Filled, Awesome Dance Contest. Pick your best dancer and shake your booty!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Chris said: “It’s something that LeShawna would probably say”.
“I can try!” said Trent.
“I’ll go!” said Izzy.
“Okay, so it’s Trent for the Killer Grips and Izzy for the Screaming Gaffers!” said Chris.
Chris put on some funky music.

Trent begun to shimmy and do the moonwalk.
“OOOH! Neil Armweak did that in the moon!” said Lindsay.
“Armstrong” said Courtney, correcting Lindsay.
Izzy begun to do flips and curls and spun around.
“Trent wins. Izzy, this is not gymnastic class, again” said Chris
. “YES!” said Trent, high-fiving Gwen.
In the confessional, Justin said: “There’s that high-five again!”

“Awww…” said Izzy.
“It’s okay!” said Owen.
“You’re right. I got a kiss, almost got a record and almost got into American Idol. That’s all I need… except a million bucks!” said Izzy.
“Gaffers, send your votes in. I’ll meet you in the Gilded Chris ceremony” said Chris.
“Okay” said Lindsay, playing around with her cellphone. “I never knew you had a cellphone!” said Tyler, to Lindsay.
“I didn’t either. I forgot about it. I have Bitsy’s phone number, Paula’s phone number, Kathy’s phone number, Sammi’s phone number, Terry’s phone number, Cody’s phone number…” said Lindsay.
In the confessional, Trent said: “Cody?! What does he have that I don’t!”

In the Gilded Chris ceremony, Chris said: “Second loss, huh? Well, the first two Chris’ go to: Owen and DJ!”.
DJ walked up and got his Chris.
Owen gobbled his Chris down, as soon as he got it.
“Owen, you are just like Cookie Monster. Except how you don’t gobble plastic cookies down that fast” said Izzy.
In the confessional, Owen said: “I might have gobbled one or two plastic cookies down before”…

“Webby, Lindsay. You get these Gilded Chris’ too!” said Chris, passing Webby and Lindsay both a Gilded Chris.
“Heather, Izzy, this is the final Gilded Chris and it goes to…” said Chris, starting the drama.
However, the drama stopped, because Lindsay’s cellphone rung.
“Hello?” said Lindsay.
“Hi Coby!” “Wait, what’s your name again?”
“Oh, Cody!"
"Do I know you from somewhere?”
“What show?”
“On the island?"
"What island?”
“Crybabynawka, sounds so familiar!”
“Where are you calling from?”
“What’s that place?”
“Why did you do that Coby?”
“Your name is not Coby?"
"Then, what is it?”
“OH! I know that name!”

Lindsay continued to talk and Chris said, “Screw this. You may go to bed. I am not listening to this dumb conversation that’ll go nowhere. Join us next time when I throw out Lindsay’s cellphone in Total Drama ACTION!” said Chris.

Chapter 5: 3:10 to the Wild West!

“Last time on Total Drama Action” said Chris. “We went to the beach in the hot weather. Sadie almost had a heart attack, as Gwen just beat Izzy’s record. Courtney almost sabotaged the Gaffers’ castle, but it backfired when birds attacked their own. In the tiebreaker, Trent dominated against Izzy. Someone was about to get eliminated when Lindsay’s phone rang and she didn’t shut up. Join us today for our second reward challenge in Total Drama ACTION!”

(theme song plays)

In the confessional, Lindsay cried.
In the girls trailer, Lindsay said: “Must keep talking!”
In the confessional, Courtney said: “I was up all night because Lindsay kept yapping on her cellphone. Even I don’t use cellphones that much!”
On the cellphone, Lindsay said: “The Hair Style store I like closed, Ariel?”
“Who ran that again?”
“Wasn’t she Canadian Idol?”
“American?” “Like the cheese? American Cheese?”
Lindsay stopped talking and said, “Good morning everyone”.
“It barely feels like morning, because SOMEONE didn’t shut up!” said Courtney.
“Corny, why are you so moody? Wake up on the wrong side of the lawsuit this morning?” said Lindsay.
Courtney growled.

“Lindsay, I have come to think that we should kick you out of this trailer” said Courtney.
“Why?!” said a sad Lindsay.
“Because, you won’t shut up” said Courtney.
“I can change” said Lindsay.
“Change is too late” said Courtney.
“In favor of keeping Lindsay in the trailer!” said Courtney.
Heather, Sadie, Gwen, Izzy and Lindsay raised their hands.
“You got to be KIDDING me?!” said Courtney.
“Hey, Lindsay. Come outside!” said Courtney. Lindsay walked out.
Courtney ran in and grabbed Lindsay’s bags. Then, she threw it outside.
“You have been kicking out” smiled Courtney, closing the door.

Lindsay knocked on the boys trailer door.
Webby walked to see who it is and opened the door. Lindsay still knocked.
“Umm… what Lindsay?!” said Webby.
“I got kicked out of the girls cabin” said Lindsay. Webby gasped.
In the confessional, Webby said: “Not a big shocker”.
“Well, this is a guys cabin” said Webby.
“Who is at the door?” asked Justin.
“Lindsay!” said Webby.
“Did she get mixed up again?!”
“No, she got kicked out of the girls trailer”.
“Shouldn’t she be in the hospital if that happened?”
“Not really, the girls just said ‘Lindsay, you are kicked out of our trailer’ or something” said Webby. Lindsay nodded.

“A guy in a girls cabin?! Is it Gwen?!” said Trent.
“No, it’s your best friend! LINDSAY!” said Lindsay.
In the confessional, Justin said: “There’s that hint again”.
“This is going to be messed up” said Owen.
“Lindsay in the guys cabin?! YES! YES! YES!” said Tyler.
Everyone looked surprised at him.
“Uhhh… haha?” said Tyler.
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “Awww… he likes me!”

“Okay all, come to the craft services tent” said Chris.
“Finally, we haven’t gone in there ever, in the first four challenges” said Webby.
Everyone walked to the Craft Services Tent.
“Today’s breakfast… plum pie” said Chef.
“Oooh!” said Owen.
“Nawt. Today’s breakfast… Rice Crapsies!” said Chef.
“Awww” said Owen, getting a bowl.

Chef gave food to everyone.
“Eat up, today’s challenge is the good ol’ wild west movie!” said Chris.
“Awesome!” said Owen.
“Wait, that means we are going to the west and going to be wild?!” asked Lindsay.
In the confessional, Tyler said:
“Lindsay is right, but we are going to do that in the guys cabin later. Me and her”.
In the confessional, Chris said: “Tyler, he is a jock, sucks at sports and likes to make out”. Chris made a confused face.

Chef collected everyone’s bowls and pointed at Chris.
“Follow me to studio five!” said Chris. Everyone followed Chris to studio five.
“Remember that sick cliff dive we had last summer?!” said Chris.
Lindsay nodded no, Gwen nodded yes and Sadie sniffled.
“Well, this fall, we are jumping off a plank onto a… donkey!” smiled Chris.
“A donkey? How wild west?!” said Gwen.
“Why couldn’t you renew the camel’s contract” said Owen.
“After Beth and Lindsay’s ugly performance, the camel didn’t want that to happen to it, so it just slowly walked away. Well, not really, because it is still in this studio. But you have to jump onto the donkey, not the camel. First team to win two challenges wins a reward!” said Chris.

“Justin, you may go first” said Chris.
“I cannot afford to do this. I may get sand by the neck, the donkey may fart or move away. Also, I am getting a new contract” said Justin.
In the confessional, Courtney said: “All of these ‘I may get sand here’ or ‘I have a modeling carrer’ or ‘I used to work at McDonalds and now I am a model’ excuses are getting old. I want to vote him off with the rest of the team. Why not bug him? I don’t care if he’s our captain or not. We need an actual captain who does great and does every challenge. Not a lame excuse of a captain who can’t do this or that!”

“You are seriously not doing this challenge?!” asked Courtney. Justin nodded no.
“Well, I thought you wanted to win. Where the heck are you in the world Justin? If you won the money, you can get…” said Courtney, beginning to rant.
In the confessional, Justin said: “I am not getting married with Sadie, I should’ve picked Izzy on my team instead of the girl who rants in her sleep, I should get more people in my alliance”.
Justin, then took off his shirt.
“The hard way” he continued.

“Courtney, if you seem involved in this challenge, you should jump!” said Chris, smiling.
“No thanks” said Courtney.
In the confessional, Tyler said: “Look at those lame-os not doing this challenge!”
In the confessional, Courtney said: “Team captains have to make the right decision. And that was mine. I won’t die. I will win”.

“Lindsay, you are up first for the Gaffers” said Chris.
“Wish me luck” said Lindsay, walking the opposite way to the ladder.
“Wrong way” said Chris.
Lindsay turned and walked the other way, up the ladder.
“I want Beth!” cried Lindsay, jumping off the plank.
In the confessional, Tyler said: “Look at that girl in midair. Lindsay is so cute!”
Lindsay landed on the donkey.
“Score one for the Gaffers!” said Chris.
“Yes!” said Izzy, high-fiving Webby.
“Next is Owen!” said Chris.
Owen was about to climb up the ladder, when Izzy said…

“Hey Chris. I want to do it. These seems so much fun. This will be my talent in America’s Got Talent. Jumping off planks, while fire twirling and gymnastics. That will be sooo cool. Then, landing on a donkey and putting the flames out!” said Izzy speed-talking. “Actually, I want to juggle puppies instead of twirling fire. What about landing on a giraffe, eating grass, ready to stampeed!” said Izzy.
“Just jump already!” said Chris.
“Okay” said Izzy, climbing up the ladder fast.

“Here we go!” said Izzy, flipping backward down onto the donkey.
She laughed the whole way down.
“This is so much fun!” said Izzy.
“Okay!” said Chris, looking to see if Izzy was safe.
“Two for the Gaffers” said Chris.
“Can I do it again, but with my eyes closed?!” said Izzy.
“Nope” said Chris.
“Awww…” said Izzy.
In the confessional, Courtney said: “We are losing. We need to win this challenge! We have four more people left. Same for them. We can win, I can just feel it!”

“Sadie, you are up!” said Chris.
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” said Sadie. She ran to the ladder and climbed up. She then jumped off the plank and landed on the donkey.
“Score one for the Grips, finally!” said Chris.
Sadie squealed “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” again and got off the donkey.
“Next is Tyler!” said Chris.
“We can do this!” said Tyler, before climbing the ladder.
“No, I can’t do this!” he said, turning around.
Courtney begun to say, “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!”
“No, just kidding, Courtney” said Tyler jumping off the plank.
The camera zoomed in on the donkey.
However, Tyler landed on the donkey but fell down.
“I’ll take that as a two, because he made contact on the donkey for a few seconds” said Chris.
“Awesome!” said Tyler.

In the confessional, Tyler said: “Time to make my big move”.
“Heather, you are up!” said Chris.
“Hey, Lindsay. Want to go to the guys trailer?!” said Tyler.
Lindsay nodded and they walked away.
In the confessional, Webby said: “The words I heard were guys trailer and then they walked off”.
“What are they doing?” asked Heather.
“I don’t know” said Chris.
Tyler opened the door and said, “Ladies first!” Lindsay walked in and Tyler closed the door.
“Okaaay” said Chris.
“Now, let’s go Heather!” said Chris.
Heather then said, “No way I am screwing up and getting my hair tangled up while I do this” said Heather.
“Okay, so its still tied. Webby, you’re up!” said Chris.

Webby then said, “I didn’t do the jumping for the cliff, I won’t do it this time either”.
“Wow, it’s still tied two to two” said Chris.
“Next is Trent!” said Chris. Trent went up the ladder and jumped off the plank.
The cameraman again focused close on the donkey. However, Trent landed on the fence.
“Ooooh” said Chris.
“That’s gotta hurt in the morning” said Webby. Owen nodded.
“That won’t count as a point” said Chris, as Trent slowly fell down.

In the guys trailer, Lindsay and Trent were kissing.
Chef was walking by the trailer when he saw this and in the confessional, he said: “They were like… bam bam? And it was gross. You can take it from here, Bam Bam”.
Bam Bam then said, “BAM BAM! BAM BAM!” and hit Chef with his stick.

“Okay, Gwen is up!” said Chris.
Gwen sighed and walked up the ladder.
“Faster” complained Chris. Gwen ran up the ladder and jumped off the plank.
She landed on the donkey.
“YES!” she yelled.
“Three to two! Grips have the lead by one!” said Chris.
“Next up is DJ!” said Chris. DJ sniffled and said, “I can’t do this. I am sorry if I let you down team”.
In the confessional, Heather said: “He did let me down real bad. We need everyone… but me to jump and make it on that donkey”.

“Okay, then… Owen, if you tie this… the next challenge will count as the one for immunity and not this one” said Chris.
Owen nodded and ran up the ladder.
He crashed on the ground and chased the donkey until he got on.
“That’s a tiebreaker!” said Chris.
The Gaffers complained. “I did that to Tyler” said Chris. The Gaffers stopped complaining.

“Well, now this next challenge will count for the awesome prize!” said Chris.
“The Wild Showdown!” Chris continued.
“Wait, we need everyone. Can someone go to the guys trailer and get Lindsay and Tyler?” said Chris.
“I will” said Heather. Everyone gasped.
“You’re not a guy” said Webby.
“Shut up!” said Heather.
In the confessional, Heather said: “I need to end whatever they are doing and yell at Lindsay”.

Heather walked toward the guys trailer and slammed the door opened.
She saw Lindsay and Tyler making out.
“What are you two doing?!” said Heather.
“Ummm… I forgot my marbles!” said Tyler, looking for them on the bed. Lindsay nodded.
“What a lame excuse?” said Heather, grabbing Tyler and walking with him outside.
Heather tied him up with his own Yo-Yo and Tyler hopped off.
Heather’s fierce eyes turned to Lindsay.
Lindsay begun to cry.
“I am soo so so so so so sorry Hannah!” said Lindsay.
“Spill the beans!” said Heather.
“I don’t see any beans though” said Lindsay.
“What just happened?!” said Heather.
“I kinda… made out with Tyler” said Lindsay.
In the confessional, Heather said: “Two people on different teams, have a relationship? That’s not good. I am breaking this love fest out. One person in my alliance and the person that I do not trust at all, have a relationship? Still not good. Time to break them apart”.

“Well, stop doing that or else you won’t go to the final two with me and you’ll get eliminated instead” said Heather.
Lindsay gasped.
“But we sleep in the same cabin” said Lindsay.
“Cabin? It’s called a trailer!” said Heather.
“But can’t I go to the girls trailer? Then, we won’t have to see each other, causing less problems!” said Lindsay.
“Good. You are now allowed in the girls trailer” said Heather.
“I AM?!” said Lindsay.
“Uhh… sure!” smiled Heather.
“Let’s go now!” said Lindsay.
“No, go back and do this next challenge!” said Heather.
“Then, go in, k?!” said Heather.
“OKAY!” said Lindsay.

Lindsay and Heather walked out.
“No, why did you drink that water?!” said Chris to Owen.
“I am so sorry. I was just thirsty!” said Owen.
“What happened now?” said Heather.
“We need a new tiebreaker challenge!” said Chris.
Chris looked around for Chef and found him.
“Do we have those animal hats from that school movie we tried to plan?” said Chris.
“Wait, school movie? Animal hats?! Is that kindergarten or something?” said Heather.
“No, that’s what tenth graders do, right?” said Lindsay.
“So you’ll expect some fifteen year old to walk around with an animal hat on?” said Heather.
Lindsay nodded yes.
In the confessional, Heather said: “Lindsay’s probably in the Official Put a Kazoo In Your Mouth While Eating Jam club”.

“Okay, the Grips will get to wear… a cow’s head as a hat while they run away from the Gaffers, wearing cool cowboy… and cowgirl hats, as well as using a rope to get the Grips. If the Gaffers outrun the Grips within the five minutes of the challenge, they’ll win. If the Grips get all of them within in the five minutes, they win!” said Chris.
“Sounds simple!” said Courtney.
“It is!” said Chris.
“Now, run like mania!” said Chris.
Everyone ran off.
Lindsay twirled herself.
“Lindsay!” said Heather.
“Hey, did you see Tyler?!” said Chris to Chef.
Chef nodded.
“Where?” asked Chris.
Chef pointed to the tied-up Tyler.
Chris giggled.
“Tyler’s out!” laughed Chris.

Courtney gasped.
“No fair, he wasn’t tied up by these ropes!” said Courtney.
Webby, sneaked up on Courtney and got her.
“Argh! Get off! I wasn’t paying attention!” said Courtney.
“Two down, four to go!” said Chris.
Sadie hid behind Justin.
“What are we doing now, captain?!” said Sadie.
“We are… not going to let me get tied up!” smiled Justin.
“Okay!” said Sadie.
“So, get yourself out, while you save me!” said Justin.
“But don’t you want to win the challenge?!” said Sadie.
Justin took off his shirt.
“Yes Justin!” said Sadie.
In the confessional, Justin said: “You know, I should start a gameshow called ‘Yes Justin’ and you have to say yes to everything I say!”

Sadie walked to Owen and Owen said, “Come on. You can run off. I don’t want to get you out”.
Sadie nodded no.
“Are you sure?!” said Owen.
Sadie nodded yes.
“Well, I’ll be here if you want to capture me with the rope” said Owen.
Owen dropped the rope and Sadie took it.
“You are playing the trick way, huh?” asked Owen.
Sadie nodded no and tied herself.
“Okay” said Owen.
“Three more for the Grips. Two more minutes left!” said Chris.
Heather threw the rope at Gwen and missed.
“Argh! How do you work these things?!” said Heather, tying herself up.
“Can someone help me?!” said Heather.
“We are like best friends!” said Lindsay.
In the confessional, Heather said: “We are like not best friends”.

Izzy tangled up Trent and Gwen together.
“How did you do that?!” asked Heather.
“I don’t know. I just learned that through the years of my life. Wait, that can be my talent. I am coming America!” said Izzy.
Webby walked to Justin and Justin said,
“Please don’t get my face, neck, chin, feet, hands, knees, chest or other important parts of my body that I need for modeling!” said Justin.
Webby put the rope on Justin.
“WE WIN!” said Webby.
“With fifty nine seconds to spare! Good job Grips!” said Chris.

“It’s so hot out here!” said Owen.
“Before, your reward. Let me tell you all a joke to make you hotter” said Chris.
“Yes!” said Lindsay and Izzy.
“No” said Heather.
“Okay. There was this fridge and it was hurt. So, I am wondering, how can fridges get hurt? Want to hear why?” said Chris.
“No” said Heather.
“Yes” said the rest of the team.
“It had a COLD CUT!” said Chris.
Everyone but Heather laughed.
“I don’t get it” said Heather.
“True, true!” said Lindsay, laughing.
In the confessional, Heather said: “Cold cut, fridge?!”

“Your reward?! Tea and… ice cream!” said Chris.
“AWESOME!” said Owen.
“Mhm” said Webby.
Owen had half of the ice cream before anyone could say the word and Izzy had a whole cup fast.
“Yum, yum, yum. AAHHHAHAHAHAH! BRAIN FREEZE. Yum, yum, yum. AAHHHAHAHAHAH! BRAIN FREEZE. Yum, yum, yum. AAHHHAHAHAHAH! BRAIN FREEZE!” said Izzy, over and over again.

Chapter 6: The Aftermath: 1

The Total Drama Action Aftermath intro played.
“Hey everyone. This is Chris McLean skipping his day off” said Chris.
”And I am bringing you the first Total Drama Action Aftermath!” said Chris.
“Can you introduce me?! I want my lady fans to say hi to the Codster!” said Cody.
“Shut up Cody” said Chris.
“Let’s have a five episode recap before we begin!” said Chris.

“In the first episode, I introduced everyone to the film set and they got chased around by a monster, controlled by Chef. Lindsay and Justin won the challenge and picked the teams in the following episode. Izzy beat Duncan in the alien challenge and Duncan was the one sent home. Next, Beth gets eliminated by a gross… acting scene!” said Chris.
Harold signaled for a bag.
An intern ran with a bag and Harold barfed in it.
“It was really that bad?!” said Beth, on the camera.
“Shut up Beth” said Chris.

“In eppy four, we had a relaxing beach challenge and the Gaffers lost. Lindsay’s phone made me say ‘screw this’ and that’s why we had no elimination. Before we move on, let’s see the Chris’ Mood Machine to see how angry I was!” said Chris.
The mood machine turned orange.
“That means I am pretty angry” said Chris.
“Can we turn it red, eh?!” said Ezekiel.
“No” said Chris.
“Shut up Ezekiel” Chris continued.

“We left off after the wild west challenge as the Gaffers won! You know, you should buy these episodes on iTunes, because there is a bonus clip in the end of each episode of me smiling!” said Chris.
“What about my rainbow monkeys?!” said Katie.
“Moving on” said Chris.
“Let’s show some never before seen clips of That’s Going To Leave a Mark!” said Chris.
“What’s that?!” said LeShawna.
“Some painful moments never seen!” said Chris.
“Excellent!” smiled Noah.

“Want some painful moments?!” said Eva, walking to Chris.
Three interns pushed Eva back.
“That girl has anger management issues” said one.
“What did you say?!” said Eva in a loud voice.
“Nothing” said the intern.
“I doubt it” said Eva.
“We’ll be right back!” said Chris, when a fight begun.

A few minutes later, Chris said: “We are back!”
Chris looked around. “Why are you showing images of my house?!” said Chris.
The cameraman went back live to the Aftermath Studio.
Chris showed a few clips, including Courtney making a hole in the bounce house.
Harold laughed. “That gurl deserved that!” said LeShawna. Noah nodded.
Another clip showed that Heather tied herself up, as did Lindsay.
LeShawna cracked up.
“It’s like your butt is going to explode” said Ezekiel.
The studio grew quiet.
“Umm…” said Chris, turning the clips on again.
The next clip shown was Lindsay’s bags getting thrown at her by Courtney.
“Ouch” said Chris.
“Final clip” he continued.
The final clip showed Fred Fred Burger taking over a frozen yogurt store.

“How did that get in the mix?!” said Chris.
“Who removed that clip with Chef and Bam Bam?!” complained Chris.
Chef ran out of the Aftermath studio and the audience laughed.

“Those were painful moments?!” said Chris.
“Now, let’s introduce the non-season two returnees!” Chris continued.
“This is our friend of Sadie” said Chris, before Katie said: “Best friend of Sadie. Sadie has other friends, like Sassy, Sissy and Samantha, but I am her best friend. We almost lived in the same house together for a month!”
“Well, that was Katie!” said Chris.

“And this is Ezekiel!” said Chris.
Ezekiel picked his nose and said, “That was a joke. Your eyes are probably playing with you, eh. It once happened with me when I played Twister, eh. One second I was in the kitchen table, the next second, I am drinking toilet water, eh” said Ezekiel.
“TMI” said Cody.
“Cody, if you would like to say something, please use proper words. TMI is not a word, but instead it is a movie company. If you do not mean a movie company, please explain what TMI means or what it stands for it, it stands for” said Noah.
“That was a long speech or rant…” said Cody.
“Shut up Cody, it’s not your turn yet!” said Chris.

“But…” said Cody.
“No butts. Now this is our barely known, Cody!” said Chris.
“Hey ladies!” said Cody.
“Move the camera back to me. That was your three seconds of fame you wanted Cody” said Chris.
Cody sighed.
“Now is our smarty pants, Noah!” said Chris.
“May I say a speech I prepared for my school?!” said Noah.
“Sure… not in this episode” said Chris.
“Thanks” said Noah, sarcastically.
“Just doing my job!” said Chris.

“Next is our geek nobody cares about” said Chris, before the audience booed him.
“No, I am JUST KIDDING!” smiled Chris.
The audience stopped booing him.
Some person in the front row said, “Harold should be in season two! Boo! Boo!”
“We don’t have people who don’t shut up here for nothing!” said Chris, pressing a button. Then, the person flew in midair.
“That’s a piece of my mind!” said Chris.
“Chris, that was a fan of mine. You can’t just do that!” said Harold.
“I am the host, so I can do whatever I want!” said Chris.
“So, can you help Steve think of more Steve camps. He made 5,193 camps and needs to make more” said Harold.
“That Steve must have a busy life” said LeShawna.

“He does, he has 12 brothers named Steve, his dad is named Steve, he has 43 friends named Steve and three sons named Steve, so that covers a lot of the camps” said Harold.
“I really… don’t care” said Chris.
“And this is LeShawna!” said Chris.
“What’s up y’all!” she said.
“LeShawnaz in da house!” said the a lot audience.
“Hey, that was my line!” she said.
“Let’s skip Bridgette and Geoff, the lovebirds” said Chris, sighing.
Bridgette and Geoff were kissing on the lips next to each other.
“Awww” said Katie.

“He made it into the merge last season, had to play a mercy game with turtles and this season, got eliminated first by Justin. Let’s bring out Duncan!” said Chris.
Duncan walked out and most of the audience clapped.
“Duncan, what’s up dude?!” said Chris.
“That lawsuit Courtney is trying to do… probably not working” said Duncan.
“It is actually” said Chris.
“That’s… good to know!” said Duncan.
“Let’s play a few games and have a few segments once we return!” said Chris.

A few minutes later, Chris said: “We are back again!”
Duncan was sitting on a couch.
“Today’s first game is… Truth or Hammer!” said Chris.
“We know if you are lying or not on these questions Duncan, please tell the truth or else a giant hammer will try to hurt you” said Chris.
“I am almost ready!” said Duncan, walking to Harold.
Duncan took Harold and said, “Now I am ready!”
“Hey, what are you doing?!” said Harold.
“You’ll see” said Duncan.

“First question; When Justin told you that you were on his team, what did you think?!” said Chris.
“I thought that the team will be awesome!” said Duncan.
Chris pressed the button for the hammer.
Duncan jumped and Harold got hurt.
“Ow” he said.
The audience booed Duncan.
“Harold, your mommy is waiting in the other room” Chris smiled.
“She is?!” smiled Harold, running out.

“Now, that we got rid of him, let’s move to question two” said Chris.
“In the alien challenge, what did you expect at the end?!” said Chris.
“I would win, but no!” said Duncan.
“Want to see what happened?!” said Chris.
“No!” said Duncan.
“Alright” said Chris.

“Third question. At the elimination, what were you thinking?!” said Chris.
“Justin will be toast, but he wasn’t and I was. I saw the next episode and he looked like toast” said Duncan.
The girls in the audience booed him, as most of the guys in the audience clapped.

“Final question. Who do you think will get eliminated next?!” said Chris.
“I still think its Justin. He has a bulls-eye on the back of his back still. If it’s not Justin, I am guessing it’ll be Trent” said Duncan.
“Interesting thoughts” said Chris.

“Now, we are going to have a final segment with Duncan. The video guest segment!” said Chris.
“I wonder who my guest will be… Courtney?!” said Duncan.
“No, she’ll rant on and on. Why not… your patrol officer?!” said Chris, putting on the television.

The patrol officer was eating chips and watching ‘Bad Girls’ on television.
The phone rang and the patrol officer said, “someone else get it. This is a good episode”.
Chris whistled.
“Hello?!” he said. “Who’s doing that?!” said the officer, still watching.
“Your pal, Chris McLean!” said Chris.
“Chris McLean?” said officer.
Chris said, “Yes”.
The officer looked like he knew the name for a second, but then said, “Don’t know it”.

“Is that your patrol officer?!” said Chris.
Duncan nodded.
“He doesn’t do a good job” said Chris.
“I know, that’s how I snuck on the show” said Duncan.
“Okay” said Chris, shutting off the television.
“Time for Beth… as soon as we return!” said Chris.

A few minutes later, Chris said: “We are back with Beth! She is sitting in the same spot Duncan did Truth or Hammer. She will be also answering four questions. Answer them incorrectly, you are out!”
“Okay!” said Beth.
“When people call you a cow, what do you think?” said Chris.
“Skip” said Beth.
“You skip?” said Chris.
“No, skip the question” said Beth.
Chris pressed the button for the hammer.
A hammer came out toward Beth. Beth didn’t notice it and fell down.
“Ouch!” she said.
“I guess that is it for Beth” said Chris.
“Aren’t you going to do something?!” said LeShawna.
“Like make SOMEONE” said Eva, pointing at herself, “Return to the show”.

“Nope!” said Chris.
In the other room of the studio, Harold said, “Where’s my mom and where’s the doctor?!”
Harold looked for band-aids and started a mess.
He broke a machine and tripped on a wire by the desk.
“Ow”! said Harold, on the floor.

“Well, before we wrap up this dumb episode, let’s have someone video guest Beth!” said Chris.
“Can we have Chris Allen?” said Beth.
“Did someone say Chris McLean?!” smiled Chris.
“No” said Beth, watching Chris’ smile disappear.
“Fine” said Chris, rolling his eyes and putting on the television.

“Chris Allen?” said Beth.
“It looks like nobody is home” said Chris.
“Maybe he is at his concert!” said Beth.
“And how do you know where it is?!” said Chris.
“I like him… it’s at Bart Boulevard” said Beth.
“Okay!” said Chris, putting on the television again.

This time, Chris Allen was singing a song.
“Stop!” said Chris.
“Who are you?!” said Chris Allen, stopping.
“Chris McLean” said Chris McLean.
“Cool, another Chris?!” said Chris Allen.
“Remember, to put on subtitles on your sets, because these next few minutes will be confusing!” said Chris McLean.
“Now, ask Beth some questions” Chris McLean continued.
“Do I know you?!” said Chris Allen.
“Yes” said Beth.
“How do I know you?!” said Chris Allen.
“From now” said Beth.
“Other than now” said Chris Allen.
“I was that girl who sent you sixty-nine letters asking you to take me with you to a concert” said Beth. “
With the braces?!” said Chris Allen.
“Not anymore!” said Beth.
“Oh you…” said Chris Allen, shutting off the television.
“HEY! Only I have control of that!” said Chris McLean.

Beth sighed. “It’ll be alright gurl!” said LeShawna.
“Join us next time for more Total Drama Action!” said Chris.
The audience clapped.
"Hello? Hello?! Can someone get me out of here?!" said Harold.

Chapter 7: The Chefshank Redemption

“Wake up in the morning feeling like Chris McLean!” said Chris, waking up. “Got no glasses, out the door. When I leave for the campers, I am coming back. I am talking torturing the campers with turtles, bugs and no parties. Stop, make it pop, like the dramatic prop! Tik Tok, when’s the theme song already?!” Chris continued.

(theme song plays)

Chef, said over the loudspeaker: “Free breakfast! Pasta, beans, everything!”
Owen woke up and broke into a wall, running off to the craft services tent, farting.
In the confessional, Owen said: “I kinda fart when I run, dance and just when I want to… like now”. Owen then farted and giggled.

“Just kidding chubby” said Chef.
Everyone soon ran in the Mess Hall.
Lindsay charged at Chef’s stomach.
“Ow!” said Chef, barfing on the floor.
“Ew!” said Lindsay, running by the door.
Chef barfed out a piece of paper, with words.
“Can someone read it?!” said Courtney.
“Not me, my hands do need grossness” said Heather.
“My looks can’t make me do that” said Justin.
Everyone talked about who will do it, until Chris said: “You know, I am right next to you with a new copy!”
Everyone turned to Chris.
“Great timing Chip. Chef barfed papers and we want to read it. Can you help?” said Lindsay.

Chris pointed to the papers that he had.
“How did you do that?!” said Lindsay. “You must be like Harry Spotter!” said Lindsay.
Chris read the paper, which had a code.
“Go to studio seven and you’ll see how to survive a prison. Interesting” said Chris.
Everyone rushed to studio seven.
“Your first challenge is to pick one person per team to each gross food by the other team in a cage. Whoever doesn’t barf the food out or holds it in the longest wins the first challenge for the team!” Chris continued, once everyone was in.

“Grips, pick me!” said Owen.
“No way, you’ll beat us for sure!” said Courtney.
“I say we pick Lindsay, she barfed shampoo and had it in the girls trailer before” whispered Courtney.
“No!” said Tyler.
“I agree” said Justin.
“Why?!” asked Courtney.
“Well, she may be dumb but don’t you think she can hold it in?” said Tyler.
“I don’t care” said Courtney.
“I am captain, so I’ll pick” said Justin.
“The Grips pick Lindsay” said Courtney out loud, before Justin could state his decision.
“Did I win?!” said Lindsay.
“No” said Courtney.
In the confessional, Justin said: “I really am thinking about quitting. Nobody listens to the CAPTAIN of the team. It’s always Courtney, Courtney, Courtney. That reminds me. Did my science teacher record that episode of 6teen?”

The Gaffers huddled.
“Let’s say Justin. He won’t do the challenge” said Heather.
“But he’s hot…” said Owen.
A cricket chirped.
“Hot for girls. That’ll ruin his modeling career” said Owen.
“This is not job day at school, this is a reality show!” said Heather.
Lindsay nodded.
“Okay, so the Gaffers pick… Justin!” said Heather.
In the confessional, Justin said: “The Gaffers picked ME?! I am not doing this challenge”.
“Lindsay, Justin, get into two cages, as both of the opposing teams add some pizzaz to each meal of grub!” said Chris.
“And also, you get to watch!” said Chris.
Lindsay walked in her cage.
“Come on John!” smiled Lindsay.
“Chris, can you make the Gaffers pick… Courtney?!” said Justin, taking off his shirt.
Chris, in his police costume said, “We have no time for this!” and threw Justin in the cage.

“Hey, Grips. I am not doing this and barfing. I am too cute to barf!” said Justin.
“No, you ARE doing this” said Courtney.
“I am the team captain and I say that I am not!” said Justin.
“Yes, you are!” said Courtney.
“Make me” said Justin.
Courtney begun to pester Justin.
“Shut up! I think we get it now. You have lawyers. You want to win! I want you to just shut up!” said Justin.
Courtney shut up. “Rude” she said, typing away on her PDA.
“If I had a way to show my awesome fans of me away, I would so step on it and insult you” said Justin.
“I don’t think you know the defenition of standing up for yourself” said Courtney, looking up from her PDA.
In the confessional, Justin said: “She’s tempted to make me quit, but I am going to do this to her. Make Chris change her team”.

“Chris, can we give a team member to the Screaming Gaffers?!” said Justin.
“I don’t see why not, unless it’s you or Sadie. Sadie is just a girl who eats McNuggets and you are the team captain” said Chris.
“Fantastic!” said Justin.
“And Lindsay has to agree to it also!” said Chris.
“Okay. Well, I would like to give them Courtney!” said Justin.
Courtney gasped.
“Lindsay, do you want Courtney on your team?!” asked Chris.
Lindsay nodded yes.
“NO!” said Heather, across the studio. “What are you thinking?!” she said.
“Maybe for that thing that we are in together” said Lindsay.
“Don’t talk about that here” whispered Heather.
“I love happy endings” said Lindsay.

“Wait, that is no fair. I was chosen to be on Justin’s team!” complained Courtney.
“Justin wanted you out, and Lindsay agreed, so you are now a Gaffer!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Courtney said: “Remember what Heather said? It’s a frog with rabies. I am not a frog with rabies! I am a grip, I play dirty and hard. I even threw an intern in jail!”
“I am on Justin’s team” said Courtney.
“No” said Chris.
“Justin, make me return to your team” said Courtney.
“No” said Justin.
“Pleeeeeeeeeaaase!” said Courtney.
“No” said Justin.
“Please please please?!” said Courtney.
“What about no don’t you understand?!” said Justin.
“I don’t understand the o” said Lindsay.

The Grips put an apple, pom-pom strings, hard strings and old shampoo on the grub.
The Gaffers put metal, ear wax, dry patch of hair, a sticker, an old piece of gum in a pocket and three dollars.
“Hey, who put my money in there?!” said Chef.
Webby whistled away from Chef and the grub.
“There!” said Gwen, giving Lindsay her meal.
Owen gave Justin his meal. “Just ignore the ear wax and the dry hair patch” whispered Owen.
Justin tried to hold his barf in.
“GO!” said Chris.
Justin threw the meal down.
“Lindsay wins!” said Chris.
“But I didn’t take a bite” said Lindsay.
Courtney smiled.

In the confessional, Courtney said: “That’s what you get for trading me on the other team!”
Chris opened the cages.
“We’re free!” said Lindsay.
“You may go to your teams!” said Chris.
“Corny, go to Justin’s team” said Lindsay.
“You put me on your team” said Courtney.
“I did?!” said Lindsay. “
No, duh” said Courtney.
“But I don’t like you” said Lindsay.
“I don’t like you either” said Courtney.
“Well, that’s a problem” said Heather.

“I want to trade Courtney back!” said Lindsay.
“Okay” said Chris.
“Courtney, you are back on the Grips!” said Chris. Courtney walked to the Grips.
“Glad to be back!” said Courtney.
“Don’t I have to agree with it?!” said Justin.
“No, Lindsay can trade her back with no agreement, but she needed your’s the first time” said Chris.
Justin sighed.
Chris took everyone outside.
“If the Gophers win this challenge, they’ll get immunity!” said Chris.
“Now, you got to escape away from this jail in an obstacle course!” said Chris.
“Pick someone on your team to do the carts. Whoever makes it to the finish line the fastest wins!” said Chris.

“I think Sadie should do it” said Justin, taking off his shirt.
“No” said Courtney.
“Okay!” said Sadie.
Before Courtney said something, Justin said: “We pick Sadie!”
“Darn” said Courtney.
The Gaffers had a harder time picking someone.
“My leg has been hurt since now” said Owen. Heather rolled her eyes.
“Lindsay, why not you do it?!” said Heather.
“Sure!” said Lindsay.
“We pick Lindsay!” said Heather.

Everyone but Sadie and Lindsay sat in the small carts.
“Couldn’t you make these bigger?!” said Heather, squished.
“Thank Courtney for using metal in the last challenge!” said Chris.
The castmates complained.
“Nobody is perfect” Courtney said.
“Let’s just do the challenge already!” said Webby.
“Fine” said Chris.
“On your marks, get set GO!” said Chris.
Lindsay tried to push the cart, as Sadie took an easy early lead.

“Let’s go Sadie!” said Justin.
Sadie pushed harder. She made it to the halfway mark, as Lindsay moved an inch.
"Can't you do it better?" said Heather.
"I am trying Hannah" said Lindsay.

Sadie then made it to the finish line.
“Let’s go!” said Justin.
“WE WIN!” yelled Courtney.
Justin clapped.
“You did good!” said Trent.
“This is the tiebreaking challenge!” said Chris.
Soon, the Grips cart returned, with nobody but Owen in it.
“I don’t get how he couldn’t do it” said Heather, rolling her eyes.
“Well, this challenge you need to do for the limit!” said Chris.
“You are going to dig underground and get out of the studio” Chris continued.
“Why can’t we just make the wall fall down?!” said Courtney.
“Well, you can’t knock down prop walls at jail” said Chris.

“Duncan has” said Courtney.
A flashback of Duncan taking a few bricks out of a wall was shown and how he made it through. Then, he made it fall down.
“He could’ve just knocked it down in the first place” said Lindsay.
Heather nodded.

“Well, a mole already begun to dig a hole for you guys, so you have to continue!” said Chris.
“Why can’t Harold do it? Isn’t he good at that stuff? He’s a nerd, can wear buck teeth and probably kissed a mole” said Courtney.
Everyone jumped in the holes with shovels.
Lindsay opened her eyes and said, “Is this the mall?!”
“No” said Heather, digging.
DJ digged in his pocket.
“Woah! Mama Spice!” he said.
“What the heck is that?!” said Heather.
“Mama Spice!” said DJ.
“Is that spice made out of mamas?!” said Lindsay.
“How can you say that Lindsay?!” said DJ.
“I said it from my mouth. It also says some things about how the time I won negative twenty nine dollars in the lottery!” said Lindsay.

Heather giggled.
“Maybe we can eat our way out. It’s good!” said DJ.
Owen nodded yes, as Lindsay, Webby, Izzy, Lindsay and Heather nodded no.
“Never mind” said DJ, putting the spice back in his pocket.
Webby, Owen and DJ continued to dig.
“We can use some help here!” said Webby, sweatily.
Owen nodded.
Izzy ran with her shovel and dug as fast as she could.

The scene went to the Grips.
“I can’t get my hair to get messy. Look at this hair flip!” said Justin, flipping his hair toward Sadie.
In the confessional, Sadie said: “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”
In the confessional, Justin said: “Here we go again, she must not have a doctor to control her squeal attacks”.
“EEE! EEE! EEEK!” Sadie kept yelling.
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” said Sadie, moving her head by the dirt, getting some of the team dirty.
“There’s dirt on my pants” said Sadie.

“My pants are dirty! What now lardo?! WHAT NOW?!” said Courtney.
“Was that insult toward me?” said Justin.
“I am not big, am I?” said Justin.
Courtney sighed.
In the confessional, Sadie said: “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Justin did a hair flip! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”
In the confessional, Courtney said: “I don’t see anything big in a hair flip”.

Izzy digged to the top for the Gaffers.
“The Gaffers win!” said Chris.
“YES!” said Webby.
Owen high-fived Izzy.
In the confessional, Owen said: “Wild girl for the win!”
“Well, now someone has to get the Grips” said Chris.
Interns jumped in and grabbed the Grips and dug out.
“Well, the Gaffers won again!” said Chris.
“Take that LOSERS!” said Heather.
Tyler sighed.
“It’s okay Tyson, just call me if you want to lose again” said Lindsay.
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “Maybe those were not the best words to say, but he should call me… if you need a hand. I love that song. Lean on Lindsay!”

“Thanks everyone!” said Courtney at the Craft Services Tent.
“Whaaaaat?!” said Tyler.
“Thanks for everything. We lost a challenge… AGAIN!” said Courtney.
In the confessional, Justin said: “I had it with this team of loons!”
“Don’t just blame us, you are apart of this team too!” said Trent.
“Yeah!” said Gwen.
In the confessional, Justin said: “That is what I mean by how they agree together. Isn’t that so weird?!”

Owen and Izzy were talking to each other on the other table.
“If you were food, you'd be dessert! Chocolate covered chocolate with chocolate sauce and sprinkles” said Owen.
“That is so nice Owen. If you were food, you’d be a banana split with about thirty bananas and a whole lot a split. Haha, I am so funny” said Izzy.
“You are one of the funniest people I know. You crack my egg up!” said Owen.
“Good one” said Izzy.

In the elimination ceremony, Chris said: “Same drill all. The first two Gilded Chris’ go to Gwen and Trent”.
Gwen and Trent both got their Gilded Chris’ and walked to their seats.
“The next Chris goes to Tyler!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Tyler said: “One more week of me and Lindsay!”
“Three more peeps, two more Chris’” said Chris.
“The next Chris goes to Courtney!” said Chris, passing Courtney a Chris.
“The final Chris goes to…” said Chris.

“Stop” said Justin.
“No” said Chris.
“Stop it already” said Justin.
“I am quitting the game because almost everyone on this team is a loon” said Justin.
Gwen, Tyler, Trent and Courtney growled.
“No, just Courtney!” said Justin.
Courtney growled.
In the confessional, Courtney said: “Me, a LOON?! No way”. Courtney’s voice got changed to a loon’s voice.

In the confessional, Heather said: “Justin, fail antagonist. Hello?!”
Justin’s ride took off in the lame-o-sine.
“Well, he was going to get eliminated anyways” said Chris.
Sadie cried.
“Join us next time for more Total Drama Action!” said Chris.

Chapter 8: One Flu Over the Cuckoos

“Last time on Total Drama Action, we had a prison movie challenge and the Gaffers won, after Courtney switched teams twice. The Grips eliminated Justin, who also quit. Today’s challenge?” said Chris, as fast as he can before barfing off-screen.

(theme song plays)

All the remaining campers walked back to the trailers after the prison movie.
“Today’s challenge was so dumb” said Courtney.
“I didn’t think so. It’s like school, but it’s not. Now, I know to smash into a wall in jail on the first day” said Lindsay.
“You know Lindsay, if you want to get plastic surgery like that ugly Megan Fox, I am fine” said Heather.
“Wait, that means I will be plastic, like Barbie?!” smiled Lindsay.
Heather sighed.

Sadie cried.
“What’s with her?” said Heather.
“She’s upset because her idol got eliminated” said Courtney, sighing.
“Ooooh! You got an idol?! Can you give me one next time, Sarah?!” said Lindsay.
“No, Justin got eliminated” cried Sadie.
“Justin, is that just a tin?” said Lindsay.
“The person” said Courtney.
“A person called Just Tin?” said Lindsay.
“Yes” said Courtney.
“Ooooh, who’s that?” said Lindsay.
“Argh!” said Courtney, walking away from Lindsay.

“You are better than ice cream with pancakes and tons of fruit and pancakes!” said Owen.
“You are better than that Barbie doll I ate for a project!” said Izzy.
“You ate a Barbie doll?” said Owen.
“Kinda” said Izzy.

Sirens begun to go off somewhere.
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “That’s the yellow submarine. We all live in the yellow submarine! The yellow submarine! The yellow submarine! We all live in the yellow submarine and we all eat pizza pockets!”

An ambulance rushed to the film set.
Izzy hid behind a bush.
In the confessional, Izzy said: “I started to set bombs in a summer camp with cooking and this guy named Steve was in charge. The kitchen went on fire and ever since then, police have been chasing me!”
“Izzy” said Lindsay, “Are you scared, because someone died in our cabin?”
“Someone died in the cabin?!” said DJ, fainting.
A body was covered in a big bag.
“Oh no!” said DJ.
Izzy ran out of the bush.
“Let me see if this person is dead or not!” said Izzy.
Izzy poked the person.

“Not the face” said Chris, taking off the big bag.
“Sorry” said Izzy.
The ambulance rushed off again.
“Start studying, because tomorrow, we are playing doctor!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Owen was eating a carrot and said, “What’s up, doc?!”
Chris passed everyone a few books.
“That’s where you’ll study from!” said Chris.
“We are having a math or social study test. I am confused” said Lindsay.
“A medical test” said Chris.
“But, I don’t want to be a doctor. I want to be the first female President of the United States of America” said Courtney.

“Well, do you want to win the challenge for your team?” said Chris.
“My team?! I am in charge?!” said Courtney.
“I guess” said Chris.
In the confessional, Courtney said: “YES! Now I can boss all of these loons around!”
“Well, I am tired, so I won’t study” said Webby, yawning and walking in the guys cabin.
Heather knocked on the door.
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “When Heather’s knocking on your door, you are wondering what live decisions made you get there”.

Webby opened the door.
“Do we have a problem?” said Webby.
“Yes, I have a problem. We need to win this challenge and as much as you need a nap, I need to win this challenge” said Heather.
“I don’t really care, because I am exhausted” said Webby, closing the door.
In the confessional, Heather said: “It’s called glue. I am gluing his lips, when he sleeps”.

“Well, for studying, you get PIZZA!” said Chef, handing everyone pizza.
“Good luck” he winked, as he headed out of the craft services tent.
“Is he kidding me? I don’t think this pizza is good or anything” said Courtney.
Lindsay smelled it.
“Smells good!” said Lindsay.
Lindsay looked at the pizza.
“Looks good!” said Lindsay.
Lindsay put a bit of the pizza in her mouth.
“Tastes like pizza, but my tongue is red” said Lindsay.
“No, duh? All our tongues are red” said Heather.
“But mine hurts” said Lindsay.
“You probably bit it or something” said Heather, reading the book and eating the pizza.

Gwen and Trent each took a slice of the pizza and ate it.
“Wow, this is good actually” said Trent.
Gwen nodded.
“Lindsay, can you watch the team while I am gone for a minute? I need to take care of something!” said Heather.
“Of the pizza?! Yeah, I should get you to take care of my pizza too!” said Lindsay, giving Heather her pizza.
“No” said Heather, putting it down.
“Eat it or save it, you slacker” said Heather.
Lindsay ate the pizza, as Heather left.
Heather snuck into the girls trailer in the dark and found some glue.
In the confessional, Heather said: “Feel free to do this at home. I really would care less if your brother or sister or family member gets seriously hurt from this!”

Heather went in the guys trailer and said, “This will be just plain gross, but worth it”.
Heather opened the cap of the glue and glued Webby’s mouth.
She put the cap of the glue on, returned to the girls trailer, put the glue back and ran to the craft services tent.
“Back” said Heather.
Everyone was complaining at Owen.
“Why did you eat all the slices?!” asked Lindsay.
“I was hungry and they were good!” said Owen, farting.
“Omar, have you ever farted that much before?” said Lindsay.
“No, but I don’t think my butt has an issue… right now” said Owen, farting again.

“I’m done!” said Lindsay, walking out of the Craft Services Tent.
“You what?!” said Heather.
“I am done. I need to sleep” said Lindsay.
In the confessional, Courtney said: “This is just great. Nobody in my team is leaving or quitting for sleep or anything else, as for the other team. They have two people leaving or quitting for something else!”
Lindsay and Heather had a conversation, ending in which Lindsay walked back in the Craft Services Tent.
“Hi everyone!” said Lindsay.
Everyone was studying and said: “Shhhh!”
“Are you about to say the sh swear?” said Lindsay.
“Shhh!” said everyone.
“I guess you are” said Lindsay.

The next morning, Webby woke up and tried to say something.
He looked around the guys cabin and tried to open his lips to say something.
He walked to the craft services tent.
Chris then announced: “Hey campers. Come to studio eight for your next challenge!” Everyone woke up and walked to studio eight.
“Today’s challenge is the first team to win two. Anyways, the first part of today’s challenge is the results from your studying!” said Chris.
“What if some people” said Heather, staring at Webby, “didn’t study”.
“Then, they flunked the test” said Chris.

In the confessional, Courtney said: “That was just great. Now, we have a chance to get more points!”
In the confessional, Heather said: “And also, Webby can’t talk. What good is he anyways?”
“Courtney, what is the disease of nose picking?” asked Chris.
“Ezekiel” said Courtney.
A bell rung.
“You are moving to round two!” said Chris.
“Yes!” said Courtney.
“Lindsay, what is the disease on talking?” asked Chris.
“Mouth?” said Lindsay.
“Eh, I’ll count it! Lindsay is moving on!” said Chris.
“I am?! YAY!” said Lindsay.
In the confessional, Courtney said: "I know those books had a cut out cereal cover in the back and front and all of those pages were from old textbooks, but I don't care. I am smarter than everyone and I am going to win this challenge!"

“Tyler, who created the un-athletic disease?” asked Chris.
“Ummm… Sean Wrench?!” said Tyler.
“No. He was the first athletic person” said Chris.
“Oh” said Tyler.
“The correct answer was… you” said Chris.
Tyler sighed.
In the confessional, Heather said: "I know that there's noun-athletic disease. Chris probably wrote that in".
“You are not moving on to round two, Tyler” said Chris.
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “I feel bad. I want to give him my spot, but Hannah is going to be a dog and bark at me”.

“Owen, who created the fail disease?” asked Chris.
“Icky Pants McGee!” said Owen.
Chris nodded, as Owen walked over with Courtney and Lindsay.
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “My science teacher was Mrs. McGee! Haha. Maybe Icky and Wanda are husband and wife!”
“Gwen, who was the first doctor to be in charge of the filmset?!” said Chris.
“Hinton Babe Bastra” said Gwen.
“Ding!” said Chris.

“Izzy, who made the tounge-i-tis disease?” said Chris.
“Me! I made it yesterday morning after drinking three gallons of Hawaiian Punch!” said Izzy, punching Tyler as a joke.
“Ow” said Tyler.
“That was a play punch!” said Izzy.
“Izzy, you are moving on!” said Chris.
After a ton of questions, it was down to two.

“Lindsay and Courtney, you made it to round eight!” said Chris.
“Isn’t it twelveteen?” said Lindsay.
“Whoever gets this question right wins this first challenge!” said Chris.
“For the electronic disease, what electronics do you need?!” said Chris.
“Please give me three electronics!” Chris continued.

“Flute, cellphone and banana!” said Lindsay.
“PDA, computer and video games!” said Courtney.
“Yes!” said Courtney.
“For challenge two, you need to get a Franken-Chris body from the goo. However, there are eels in there, so it may electrocute you. Just put it together and put it up, so then I can declare a winner!” said Chris.
“Simple!” said Courtney.
“Pick one person to start off for your team, then, someone else goes” Chris continued.

“Izzy will go first” said Heather.
“Sadie will go first” said Courtney.
“Okay” said Chris.
Izzy went in and found a head.
She threw it to Owen.
“That is so much fun! Can I do it again?!” said Izzy.
“Nope, it’s someone else’s turn!” said Chris.
"Aww" said Izzy, tripping.
"I think you have Tripitios!" said Lindsay.
"I think I do too! Hahaha! That must be so cool!" said Izzy.
In the confessional, Heather said: "Loons!"
Sadie went in the goo and found an eel. “AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” she screamed in the goo. She spit out some goo, as she went under it again.
In the confessional, Sadie said: "If only Justin was here. He probably would've liked the goo".
Owen went in and got bit by an eel.
“Ow” said Owen, sinking slowly.

In the confessional, Courtney said: “We so are not winning this challenge” and sighed.
Sadie suddenly came up holding to feet and around her head was a hand.
In the confessional, Courtney said: “Or maybe not. Especially because my PDA has a webcam, which can spot each of the pieces!”
Sadie threw the hand to Courtney and the feet to Gwen and Trent.
They put it on the body holder.
Sadie got out of the goo and screamed “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”.
In the confessional, Sadie said: “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”
“EEE! EEE! EEEK!” she kept yelling.
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” she rolled on the goo, that was drying on the ground.
Tyler slowly walked away.
In the confessional, Sadie said: “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I gave my team three pieces and met an eel and EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”

“Me next!” said Courtney, jumping in and searching with her PDA for more pieces.
Owen got back up and out with the chest and the main part of the body.
“Yes!” said Owen.
Lindsay and DJ took the pieces and put it on the Chris.
Courtney found another foot and the chest.
“YES!” said Courtney, throwing the foot at Sadie, who was still rolling on the floor, squealing.
“SADIE!” said Courtney.
“What?!” said Sadie, looking at the foot.
In the confessional, Courtney said: “Don’t what me”.
“Oh!” said Sadie, picking it up and putting it in on the Chris.

Courtney ran out and threw the chest on the Chris too.
“The Grips are just two pieces away from the win!” said Chris.
After Owen got out, Heather said: “I am not going in there”.
“I’ll go!” said Lindsay. “Good!” said Heather.
Lindsay searched in the goo and found a foot.
“No, that’s not lipstick” said Lindsay, throwing the foot back in.
“LINDSAY!” yelled Heather.
In the confessional, Heather said: “Why the” said Heather, before a bleep “did she throw that foot back in?! Now we lost for sure!”
“Grab that foot and bring it back!” said Heather.
“But don’t we have to find lipstick?” said Lindsay.
“Just do what I said” said Heather.
Lindsay grabbed the foot and got out.
“Webby, you are next!” said Heather.

The Grips found all of their pieces and begun to bring the Chris up. "The Grips are about to win!" said Chris, as the Grips found another piece.
"Hurry guys!" said Heather.
Int hte confessional, Heather said: "I was right. This team is full of loons. Just because Lindsay picked nobody good, of course except me".
“Hurry up, they are close!” said Courtney, paying some attention to the Gaffers.
“Can we chill? They are far away from winning. They need like three more pieces!” said Trent.
Courtney pushed harder, as the Chris reached the top.
“YES!” said Courtney.
“WE WON! WE WON! WE WON!” she continued.
“Fantastic job. Well, today. I am being nice to the Grips and going to give one of them an awesome prize. Vote on it!” said Chris.

“I think Sadie should get it!” said Tyler.
“I agree” said Gwen.
“Sure” said Trent.
“I think I here should get it” said Courtney.
“Well, I guess Sadie gets the reward, because three is the majority of the team!” said Chris.
Someone suddenly knocked on the door.
“Someone is dying!” said Lindsay.
“I think you got the wrong hospital” said Chris to the stranger wearing pink, standing perfectly.

“No” said the stranger.
“Is that…” said Sadie.
“Don’t start!” said Heather.
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” said the stranger, which turned out to be Katie.
“Wait, are you telling me that she is returning and I had to go nuts over these challenges for nothing?!” said Courtney.
“No, but they are both going back home for the next two days!” said Chris, smiling.
“WHAT?!” said Courtney.
“You heard me. They are going back home for the next two days!” said Chris again.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" squealed Katie and Sadie, again running out of the studio.
“Anyways” said Chris, looking at the Gaffers.
“One of you will be heading outta here. We’ll see in a few hours at the Gilded Chris Ceremony. See you there!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Heather said: “I know who I am going to vote”.
In the confessional, DJ said: “I don’t know who to vote out. I guess I’ll vote for myself, because everyone is my friend and they kinda do deserve the money more than me!”

A few hours later in the Gilded Chris ceremony, everyone voted and Chris said: “Everyone but DJ and Heather worked hard, so they all get Chris’!” said Chris, handing Owen, Webby, Izzy and Lindsay each a Chris.
“The final Chris goes to…” said Chris.

“Heather” said Chris.
“YES!” said Heather, getting the Gilded Chris.
“How?!” said Owen.
“The secrets of a ballot box!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Lindsay said: "Maybe I can talk the ballet box into giving me the votes!
DJ then said, “Don’t worry guys. I’ll be cheering for everyone back wherever I am going”.
“One more surprise before we head off” said Chris.

The lame-o-sine doors opened and sitting down was DJ’s momma.
“MOMMA!” said DJ, running in.
“I saved the spice you told me to keep!” said DJ.
“Good job Poopydoo. You did a g-“ said DJ’s momma.
“DJ, clean off your shoes. This is a fancy car!” said DJ’s momma.
DJ cleaned off his shoes and got in the car.
“You did a good job!” said DJ’s momma.
“Thanks momma!” said DJ.

“Bitter sweet moments of your life, but next time we’ll scare them all down your pants in Total Drama ACTION!” said Chris.

Chapter 9: The Sand Witch Project

“Last time on Total Drama Action, we played doctor and Courtney went beastie on everyone. Sadie won the reward and is now home with her BFFFL or whatever, Sadie. I mean, Katie. Those two girls are so confusing. In the end, DJ got eliminated and wiped off his shoes. Is there a doctor in the house for that? Anyways, tonight, don’t wet your pants after watching the Boogey Man, nor have Chicken-i-tos, because this challenge is the scariest yet on Total Drama Action!” said Chris.

(theme song plays)

It is dark and Chris blows a horn at midnight.
“I have been waiting for this for… six hours!” said Chris.
A lame-o-sine returns with a girl with pink in it.
Lindsay woke up and walked outside. “THE PAPARAZZI IS FINALLY HERE!” she yelled.
“No silly. It’s me!” said Sadie.
“Katie?!” said Lindsay.
“Sadie” said Sadie.
“Oohhh, are you the paparazzi?!” said Lindsay.
“I dunno” said Sadie.
“I dunno either” said Lindsay.
“Haha, I dunno that you dunno if I am paparazzi” said Sadie.
“Can we shut up? Some people can use sleeping time!” said Gwen, in the girls trailer.
Sleepily, Trent said: “Yeah yeah, listen to Gwen” and fell back to sleep, in the guys trailer.

The castmates slept in for most of the morning.
In the girls trailer, Heather woke up. “When is the challenge already?!” said Heather.
Lindsay woke up a few seconds later. “Maybe we get a day off” said Lindsay.
“Maybe some people want to win” said Heather.
In the confessional, Heather said: “I am in this game to win this game and of course to be more popular!”

Everyone soon woke up.
In the confessional, Webby said: “Heather put glue on my mouth?! Oh, someone is getting payback for that”, showing everyone a shaver.
In the guys trailer, Webby said: “When will Chris begin our tri-daily torture?!”
“Maybe we have none today” said Tyler, on the brighter side.
In the confessional, Tyler said: “I could use this day to spend some more time with Lindsay. Let’s just hope Heather doesn’t get in my love life though this time”.

Chef served everyone breakfast.
Heather was waiting for an announcement.
“Where is Chris?!” said Heather.
Chef ignored Heather and served Owen some breakfast.
Everyone ate their breakfast and went outside.

“Do you think Chris is just messing with us again like last season?!” asked Webby.
“I don’t know, he does that with us a lot” said Owen.
“Maybe he needed some down time” said Trent.
Owen and Webby laughed.
“Isn’t he the host of this show?” said Webby.

Trent then said, “I don’t know where he is, but I am still going to take that as a thought. Want to play Go Fish?”
“Sure” said Owen.
“Where’s the fish?” Owen continued.
“The card game” said Trent, showing the cards.
"Oohhhhhh!" said Owen.
In the confessional, Owen said: "I was looking forward for eating fish".
Trent, Owen, Tyler and Webby played go fish for a while until Chris announced the new challenge.

Over the loudspeaker, Chris said “Today’s challenge is a horror movie. Come to studio nine for details!”
“Finally!” said Heather.
Everyone walked to studio nine and immediately, bats begun to attack Heather.
“Get off!” said Heather. Gwen laughed, as a bat swooped above her.
Lindsay screamed and ran to studio eight.
“It’s empty. Nobody is dead!” said Lindsay, in relief.
A fly crashed into a door.
“Never mind” sighed Lindsay, walking back to studio nine.

“Chris, can you explain that bats in here?!” said Heather.
“This is a horror movie, Heather. We had one last season and I felt like we can have another one this season” said Chris.
In the confessional, Webby said: “I am thinking of DJ. I feel glad that he is not here, because he would’ve been freaked out and scared. At least he is with his mother… wherever…”
“Pick a cereal killer for today’s challenge and I’ll explain!” said Chris.
The teams broke off.
In the confessional, Owen said: "I hope we don't run around the island again, because that was so scary and not fun".

The Gaffers discussed: “I say Hannah should do it, she’s scary!” said Lindsay.
Heather glared at Lindsay.
“In a good way!” said Lindsay.
“I should be the killer. I have chased ducks, geese, preschoolers, twilight fans, a PDA and people out of jail before” said Izzy.
“I think Heather should. She glued my lips for a day, so maybe she can… you know. Scare us? And look at her face, it looks like she didn’t get enough sleep” said Webby.
Heather growled and said, “At least I was not stupid enough to sleep and not study a few days ago”.
“Shut up, I needed the rest” said Webby.

“But I think I should be the killer. Look at my scary face!” said Izzy, sticking out her tongue in a more happier face.
“That’s not scary” said Owen, admiring Izzy.
Izzy begun to growl and her face got angrier.
“Now that’s a scary face!” said Owen.
In the confessional, Webby said: “That first face isn’t scary, but reminded me of the face of that fan of Courtney and Duncan, who took me as Duncan once and liked this season. Courtney~Duncan-TDA or something. I don’t know. Either way, I recently heard they crashed a golf cart into an Owen and Izzy fan. Freaks these days”.

“I guess… Heather!” said Webby.
“Same!” said Lindsay.
“You are as cute as a bug in a rug!” said Owen.
Izzy turned angry again.
In the confessional, Owen said: “How knew Izzy had mood flares?!”
“I guess I have the role!” smiled Heather.
Lindsay smiled.
“We pick Hannah!” said Lindsay.
In the confessional, Izzy said: “This challenge will be even better than the time I begun to narrate my life!”

In a flashback, Izzy said: “Izzy walked slowly to the kitchen table and saw dinner. Good ol’ dinner she said. Izzy took a bite of the dinner and saw a bomb. Izzy ran off as fast as she can into the living room, as the kitchen got set on fire. Her mother also survived out of the fire. Izzy thought that her mom should not put bombs in their meals”.
Izzy’s mom smacked Izzy.
“That’s dessert!” said her mom.

The Grips discussed: “I think I should do it!” said Courtney.
“I agree” said the team.
“You really are scary!” said Sadie.

“Okay, so my team picks me as the killer!” said Courtney.
“Okay, so it is both Courtney and Heather!” said Chris, handing them masks.
In the confessional, Chris said: “Both ladies, both evil. This I got to see!”
“Whoever screams the loudest, judging on our scream-o-meter will win the challenge for the team” said Chris.
“Okay” said Heather.

“Can Owen and Izzy walk to one side and Gwen and Trent to the other side?!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Chris said: “Reviewing Gwen and Trent’s actions, they like each other. Not like, but like like”.
In the confessional, Gwen said: “What are we doing with each other?”
In the confessional, Trent said: “This feels great and awesome!”

“Both couples must kiss and the loudest screamers win for their team!” said Chris.
“Okay!” said Owen, leaning toward Izzy.
“GO!” said Chris.
Slowly, Trent kissed Gwen.
In the confessional, Chris said: "I KNEW IT! I KNEW THEY LIKED EACH OTHER! I called it first episode on Chef. Ha! Who owes me n-argh. That was just a season one bet. I hate you". Chris then texted something to Chef.

Courtney jumped up behind them and both of them screamed: “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”
The Scream-o-Meter showed eighty out of one hundred.
“Let’s see if the Gaffers can beat that!” said Chris.
Owen and Izzy made out with each other.
Heather snuck on them and found a small chainsaw.
She roared it, but Owen and Izzy were still busy making out.
“HELLO?!” said Heather.
“Oh yeah, AH!” they said, still making out.
“ARGH!” said Heather, waking off.
The Scream-o-Meter showed twenty out of one hundred.
"The Grips win part one!" said Chris, returning to everyone else.

“The Grips win part one of the challenge. Now can Lindsay and Katie come to the outhouse?” said Chris.
“Katie?!” said Lindsay and Sadie.
“I mean Sadie!” said Chris, facepalming. Sadie and Lindsay both came into separate outhouses.
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “I won’t wet my pants!”
Heather roared and Lindsay screamed “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”.
She suddenly wet her pants and screamed again “AHHHHH!”.
“Finally. Something going like I want it to go!” said Heather.
The Scream-o-Meter showed ninety out of one hundred.
“Wow, just wow” said Chris.

Courtney knocked on the door and Sadie said, “Come in!”
Courtney opened the door and Sadie welcomed her by saying, “Welcome to Sadie’s Playhouse!”
“Playhouse?! 1. This is an outhouse. 2. We aren’t playing or having fun. 3. This is a challenge we need to win!” said Courtney.
“Courtney, just because you think it is not a playhouse doesn’t mean that it is not altogether!” said Sadie.
“Argh! I had it with these dumb playhouses and the twerps. We need to win a challenge!” said Courtney.

“Courtney, we won the last one, you don’t need to just get angry when we lose one part of the challenge” said Sadie.
“But if we won this part, I would have to work less and we can just win already!” said Courtney.
Chris then announced, "The Gaffers win part two. It is now tied one per team! This is the tiebreaker right now! The reward is on the line!"
Lindsay said: "On what line? I don't see much lines?"
Chris then said: "It's just a saying".
In the confessional, Chris said: "It is so difficult doing this with her, because she doesn't understand anything".

“Webby, Tyler. Please report to the forest. Challenge three is getting underway!” said Chris.
Webby and Tyler followed Chris into a forest-like zone of the studio.
In the confessional, Heather said: “This better work!”
Heather snuck up near Webby. She roared her chainsaw and threw rocks at him.
“Ow” he said. "That really hurts" Webby continued.
In the confessional, Webby said: "Someone is getting revenge at the end of the season".
She put on a mask and showed her face to Webby.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” screamed Webby, running out of the studio nine to studio one.

In the confessional, Courtney said: “That wasn’t as bad as Sadie’s squeal attacks”.
In the confessional, Webby said: “Heather needs to get new cream, she looks like a monster!”
In the confessional, Heather said: “What?!”
“Webby scored a perfect one hundred!” said Chris.
“YES!” said Webby.
In the confessional, Tyler said: “Why I am scared of Courtney? I know she’s coming…”
Courtney snuck up and Tyler and poked him.
Tyler pretended to scream: “AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH”.
“That’s fifty out of one hundred. THE GAFFERS WIN!” said Chris.
The Gaffers cheered.

In the confessional, Heather said: “YES!”
In the confessional, Courtney said: “NO!”
“Now, today is a reward challenge!” said Chris.
“Is that the money?!” said Lindsay.
“No, the Gaffers are going to SIX FLAGS!” said Chris.
“Six flags? What’s that?! Waving six flags around? That sounds… boring!” said Lindsay.
“Yes!” said Izzy.
“Roller coasters and everything!” said Izzy.
“Pack your barfbags, this is going to be one heck of a ride on the Horror Rides!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Webby said: “I again feel happy that DJ isn’t here, I wish I wasn’t here also. I hate big roller coasters”.

In the confessional, Tyler said: “There goes spending the next few days with Lindsay”.
“Join us next time for another exciting episode of Total Drama Action!” said Chris.

Chapter 10: Masters of Disasters

“Last time on Total Drama Action, Heather and Courtney were the killers in the horror challenge and the Gaffers won the challenge, so now they went to SixFlags for a few days. Let’s see if Courtney will go nuts in this episode of Total Drama Action!” said Chris.

(theme song plays)

Chris said over the loudspeaker: “Good morning castmates. Today’s challenge is a disastrous challenge and maybe a few of you will get into a big disaster. Anyways, get dressed and come to studio ten for your first challenge”.
Everyone got dressed and walked to studio ten.
“I’ll throw bombs if you don’t come sooner!” said Chris, over the loudspeaker.
In the confessional, Izzy said: "Did someone say boms?!" and then, she laughed.
Everyone ran to studio ten.
“Much better” said Chris.
“So, what are we doing today?!” asked Courtney.
In the confessional, Heather said: “I need the teams to get merged today. My alliance has grown weak. I need Sadie and Tyler! But not weird goth girl and shaggy kid with a guitar”.

“Are we merging the teams?” said Heather.
“No” smiled Chris.
“But we will soon!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Heather said: “I have no time for soon. I want it now, I sound like Courtney”.
“Today’s challenge is a disaster movie challenge if you did not hear over the loudspeaker” said Chris.
“I didn’t. Sorry” said Lindsay.
“Both teams must run on this obstacle course full of… snakes, monkey bars, bombs, walls and a few more things we added” winked Chris.
“Monkey bars?!” said Lindsay. “I don’t see any monkeys” Lindsay continued.
“No, duh. The monkey part is just a saying” said Courtney.

“Now, can everyone move to the white line?” said Chris.
Everyone walked to the white line, as Chris went into his golf cart.
“Why do you need that” said Owen, a bit nervous.
“You’ll see” said Chris.
“Alrighty!” said Owen.
“GO!” Chris then said.
Everyone ran.
Lindsay swung on the monkey bars and fell down into a hole.
She jumped back up and tried again.
“Hurry up!” said Heather.
Lindsay fell.
“Do it like this!” said Heather, walking around it.
Lindsay walked around it, along with the Gaffers.
“Cheaters!” yelled Courtney.
In the confessional, Courtney dialed on her PDA.
A snake slowly crept up to Owen.
“YIKE!” said Owen, running toward a wall.
“SNIPE?!” yelled Izzy.
“Where? Where?! Where?!” said Izzy, taking out her paintbal gun.
“A pipe?! I like to play the pipe!” said Lindsay.
“I said YIKE!” said Owen, climbing up a wall, which fell to the front.

In the confessional, Chris said: “They are screwing this obstacle course up!”
Chris begun to shoot golf balls.
“Throw here! THROW HERE!” said Tyler.
Chris shot a golfball at Tyler’s foot.
“Ow” said Tyler. “I meant by my hands” he said.
Chris threw something that almost got his head.
“I am a bad shot” said Chris to himself.
Chris continued to shoot golfballs.
One was shot at Courtney’s PDA! “MY PDA!” said Courtney, rushing to it.
She growled at Chris.
In the confessional, Chris said: “I am so not getting a new contract”.
Lindsay ran to Courtney with a band-aid.
Lindsay put it on the PDA.
“LINDSAY!” yelled Heather.
“What are you doing?!” said Courtney.
“What are you doing?!” said Heather.
“What am I doing what?!” said Lindsay.
“You are…” said both Courtney and Heather before they both begun to not say the same things together.

“AHHHHHHHHH!” said Lindsay, running straight to the finish line.
“WE WIN!” said Heather.
“Is your whole team there yet?!” said Chris.
“No” said Lindsay.
“Well, you don’t win” said Chris.
Lindsay gasped.
Chris shot golfballs at the Gaffers. “
Hurry guys! Get in the tunnel!” said Owen.
Chris ran out of golfballs.
“Give me whatever you have!” said Chris to Chef. C
hef threw eggs at Owen, who ate them.
"Yeah, eggs. That'll help. He loves food!" said Chris.
"I am trying, dude" said Chef.
“What about your novel?!” said Chris.
“You kidding me, right?!” said Chef.
“Just give me it!” said Chris.
Chef gave Chris his unfinished novel and Chris threw it at Owen.
It hit his teeth and Owen got knocked out.
The Grips then, dashed to the finish line together.
“WE WIN!” said Courtney.

“I had no idea about my strength! I am sorry!” said Chris.
Sirens went off.
“THE RCMP! AHH! AH! AH! BE PREPARED!” said Izzy, running in circles.
“She’s nuts” said Webby.
An ambulance came.
“Is this another doctor movie?! Can I join the doctor club?!” asked Lindsay.
“No, this is serious!” said Chris.
Lindsay ran to a paramedic.
“Hi! Can I be important like you?!” said Lindsay.
The paramedic said: “M’am, I suggest you keep silent. I have a job right now”.
“But, can’t you just answer my question?”
“M’am, I have to take this heavy person into the hospital”.
“I am a man? Aren’t I a women?!”
“M’am, I just said m’am. Now, shut up!”
“Shut up!”
“You are not my mom!” said Lindsay.
"WHY CAN'T YOU JUST SHUT UP?!" said the paramedic.
Another paramedic came out of the ambulance, which was a guy and at first look, he looks like Justin.

“IS THAT JUSTIN?!” said Sadie.
“Here we go again” sighed Courtney.
In the confessional, Sadie said: “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”
In the confessional, the paramedic said: “Why is that freak freaking out?”
“EEE! EEE! EEEK!” Sadie kept yelling.
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” said Sadie, running into the stretcher.
“Look what you did m’am!” said the first paramedic that was talking to Lindsay before.
“Oww” said Owen.
“I am SO sorry. I am SO sorry” said Sadie, walking away.
In the confessional, Sadie said: “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! That’s Justin!”
“You just look like Justin” said Sadie to the second paramedic.
“I am Justin”.
“You are?!”
“How did you get this job so fast?”
In the confessional, the second paramedic said: "Is she a stalker or something?"
“From school and all” said the paramedic.
“Aren’t you still in college?”
“No, I graduated last summer”.
“Well, congratulations!”
“Thank you”.
“No, thank you. Join us next time on… the Sadie Show”.
“The what?!”

Owen fell down when he was in the stretcher.
“Well, I think you should all move on to a different scene. This won’t be that pretty” said the second paramedic.
“Bye!” said Sadie.
“Wait, I can’t tell my mom that?!” said Lindsay.
The first paramedic said “no”.
“Okay, bye mailman!” said Lindsay.
In the confessional, the first paramedic said: "For crying out loud, I am not a mailman!"
In the confessional, Lindsay said: “He told me that my mom kissed a camel on her first date. I know that’s a lie, because she hates camels like that guy”.

Chris and Chef went in the control room.
“What happened to the lava that you allowed me to shoot out?!” said Chef.
“I didn’t want to do it, because of Owen and everything” said Chris.
Over the loudspeaker, Chris said: “Because Owen got injured, the Gaffers win part one. We need no more lawsuits”.
“But we were there first!” said Courtney.
“Safety first!” said Chris.
Chef snatched the loudspeaker from Chris.
“That’s why we had that bus ride, which only Chris paid attention to!” said Chef, giving Chris a cookie.
Chris ate the cookie over the loudspeaker.
“Where are we?!” said Heather.

“Rafts!” said Chris.
“Because you won the challenge, you get a code advantage to help you out!” said Chris.
“The code is in Lindsay’s pocket. I am sure she’ll do a perfect job protecting it!” said Chris.
“Yeaaaaaah!” said Heather. “Give me that!” said Heather, snatching it from Lindsay.
“It’s just shapes!” said Heather, looking at it.
“That’s what it is supposed to be, it’s a code! Just solve it!” said Chris.
An intern threw two knives at the rafts, which sunk into a submarine!
The scene zoomed out to the Gaffers’ yellow submarine.
“Not again” said Heather.
“Webby, can you say ‘OH’!” said Lindsay.
“No!” said Heather.
“OHHHHH!” said Webby, in a deep voice.

“We all live in a yellow submarine! A yellow submarine! A YELLOW SUBMARINE! We all live in a yellow submarine! With a red alarm flashing! Come on guys!” said Lindsay.
“This isn’t preschool” said Heather, rolling her eyes.
Water begun to rise.
“This seem so much fun!” said Izzy. Meanwhile, in the control room “UNO!” yelled Chris.
“I said no stacks!” said Chef.
“Noooo, I called it in the beginning of the game!” said Chris.

Back in the Gaffers' submarine, Heather threw the code in the rising water.
Back in the control room, “I think the water is rising a bit… fast” said Chris, watching closely at both submarines.
“Chris, don’t worry about it. Nothing bad is going to happen” said Chef.
“This is a reality show. I didn’t think something was going to happen when Owen hurt his jaw or whatever and now this is happening. I bet one of them is going to drown and die” said Chris.
In the confessional, Chef said: “Love it!”
In the confessional, Chris said: “Hate it!”
“What if we stop the water?”
In the confessional, Chris said: “Love it!”
In the confessional, Chef said: “Hate it!”

Izzy begun to kick the water and jump.
In the confessional, Webby had water on his hair. “Why do I have to be stuck with crazy, dumb and evil?!”
Meanwhile, the water rised toward Courtney.
“My PDA won’t take this! STOP THE WATER! STOP IT!” said Courtney.
“Ignore it!” said Chef.
“I can’t. This is my career we are talking about!” said Chris.
“I have one too! So just ignore it!” said Chef, breaking the water machine.
“Uh oh” said Chef.
“CHEF!” said Chris.
Water rose up fast.
“Woah, something bad must have happened” said Webby.
“Shut up, we need to get to the bottom and open the vault!” said Heather.
“I can’t do it, I hate water in my eyes” said Webby.
“I can’t do it, I can’t risk getting my hair wet” said Heather.
“I can’t do it, because I want to talk to Heather” said Lindsay.
In the confessional, Heather said: “Joy”.
“I CAN! I LOVE THIS! I once tried to be a lifeguard and someone begun to drown. I jumped in with a superwoman costume and I saved the day. I then jumped on their stomach and took their lunch money!” said Izzy.

“Interesting…” said Heather.
“Can you just go underwater and save us?!” said Webby.
“Sure, but first I need a bomb!” said Izzy.
“IZZY!” yelled the team.
Meanwhile, Tyler said: “Maybe I can go under and kick the vault. Then, all the water can come out!”
“That’s a great idea, but you are a jock” said Courtney.
Ignoring Courtney's comment, Tyler said: “For my father!”, going underwater.
“Yes! Yes! Tyler is saving my career. I never thought he’ll do it!” said Chris.
Over the loudspeaker, Chris said: “Whoever opens the vault wins immunity, no matter what!”

“Izzy, do you REALLY need a bomb to open a vault?!” asked Heather.
Izzy ignored Heather and begun to swim underwater.
A fish bit her.
Izzy came back up with it.
“Aren’t you supposed to be down there opening the vault?!” said Heather.
“But this fish bit me!” said Izzy.
“Awww!” said Lindsay.
“How the heck can a fish get in here?!” said Webby.
“Oh no. Did you put my dinner in there?!” said Chris.
Chef nodded, slowly.
“DUDE! I can’t be eating pickles for dinner!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Chef said: “That’s what happens if you skip the food challenge and instead do a disaster movie, which is turning out to be a disaster”.

Tyler kicked the vault hard.
“Ow!” he said, underwater.
The water stopped flowing and begun to drown.
Tyler hopped out of the water, along with everyone.
“We win!” said Tyler, getting ut of the water.
“YES! My career is saved!” said Chris.
Over the loudspeaker, Chris said: “The Grips win immunity!”
“YES!” they said.
Sadie high-fived Tyler.
“Nice job Tyson!” said Lindsay.
“Thanks!” said Tyler.
In the confessional, Tyler said: "I needed that moment. Now my team and Lindsay likes me again! Maybe tomorrow, I can show them my duel skills!"

Chris walked out to the Grips.
“You also get a choice to a volcano that is about to erupt or chips and pop. Which will it be?!” said Chris.
Everyone said, “Chips and pop”.
“Can I have some too?” asked Lindsay.
“You lost” said Chris.
“The game?!” said Lindsay.
“Can someone shoot me?!” said Chris.

“The Gaffers will discuss who to eliminate!” said Chris.
In the confessional, Heather said: “Izzy has to go home today, because she could’ve won the challenge for us, if the bombs didn’t distract her!” Courtney talked with the Grips.
“We need to keep this up! I hope they eliminate Owen tonight. He is seriously injured and he’ll get beat up more and I can tell he has a crush with Izzy. So, of course that means the word ALLIANCE”.
Everyone nodded.

In the Gilded Chris ceremony, Chris said: “We have you all back again. The first two Chris’ go to Webby and Lindsay!”
Owen drank a milkshake and farted on his wheelchair.
“He’s alright!” said Chris.
Izzy relaxed again.
“The next Chris goes to Heather” said Chris.
Owen and Izzy stared at each other.
“Didn’t think it’ll come to this, huh?” said Chris.
“Anyways, the final Chris goes to…” said Chris.

“We have a tie” said Chris.
“Instead of letting Webby revote, I’ll call the Killer Grips over and they’ll vote who should go home, just for dramatic reasons!” said Chris.
Chef told them to come and they all ran to the Gilded Chris ceremony.
In the confessional, Courtney said: “Well, I guess that was a good time to say that about Owen earlier”.
Chris gave them all a voting device.
“Vote Izzy or Owen to get eliminated” said Chris.
Soon, the final votes were cast and Chris said: “The final Chris goes to…”

“It’s another tie!” said Chris.
“Impossible!” said Heather.
“Just kidding, Owen, bud. You have been eliminated” said Chris.
Owen sighed.
In the confessional, Webby sighed and said: “I’ll miss the big guy”.
In the confessional, Heather said: “The votes were unfair. Izzy deserved to go home. Owen might have screwed up, but Izzy screwed up with something called immunity on the line!”
Izzy took Owen to the walk of shame.
“Wait” said Owen.
Chris walked over, “Yes?” he said.
“Can I have soda and chips?” said Owen.
“Sure” said Chris, signaling for Chef. “Don’t sue though” said Chris.
“I know” said Owen.
Chef returned with a blender, chips and pop.
Owen blended the pop and chips together.
"Gross" said Heather.
Lindsay nodded.
“Hey! You dropped your chips in my pop! Hey! You spilled your pop in my chips” said Owen.

“Probably the pain meds” said Chris.
Izzy took Owen to the lame-o-sine.
She pushed too hard and Owen was in the middle of the road, helpless.
“Who will save him?” said Lindsay.
“Don’t worry, he’s perfectly fine” said Chris.
The cameraman pointed the camera toward Owen and the cars in the middle of the street.
“Well, not really. Someone will save him soon next time on Total Drama ACTION!” said Chris.

Chapter 11: Cody of the Film Set

“Last time on Total Drama Action, we put the aster in disaster. Owen got hurt and the contestants almost drowned. Blame Chef, not me. Either way, Chef is in jail… nawt. He’s chillaxing. In the end, Tyler saved my career and Owen got eliminated in Total Drama Action!” said Chris. Chris’ phone rang. “No. Shut up” said Chris said Chris on the phone.

(theme song plays)

Chris blew a horn and said on the loudspeaker, “Good morning castmates”. “Why are we outside?” said Courtney, on the grass. “My back” complained Heather. “Watch it!” said Lindsay. “Today’s ch-“ said Chris, before his phone rang, yet again. Chris answered it and said, “Your ride is coming in a few. No, Harold’s agent said there’s no agents. I have no time for this, shut up”. “Today’s challenge is the jungle movie. You know, fans online have been bugging me to let Cody return to the game with a jungle challenge. One girl, Sierra or something even tried to take my photograph books and stalk me” said Chris.

“So, that’s why you were sleeping outside and was woken up this early. Now, Chef is… chillaxing right now and…” said Chris. “Chillaxing?!” said Heather. “Yes. To find out the answer for that, come back next week” said Chris. “I won’t get eliminated tonight, so I’ll be here for the answer” said Heather. “So, you all need to get food. That’s your first challenge and--“ said Chris, before his phone rang again. “This kid gotta stop bugging me!” said Chris, answering his phone. “You’re at Camp Wawanakwa?! Didn’t we sell it to Jeff Mehget To? Just take the Boat of Losers”.

“What’s going on?” said Webby. “Oh, nothing!” said Chris, smiling. In the confessional, Chris said: “Read the title. It’s a giveaway! Cody of the Filmlot”! The lame-o-sine honked and Cody jumped out, as the ‘George of the Jungle’ theme music played. Cody walked next to Chris and rung his cellphone: “What?!” said Chris. “I am here!” said Cody, next to Chris. “You know you could’ve just told me dude” said Chris, hanging up the phone. “And also, returning to the competition is Cody” said Chris. “No fair. I needed to file three lawsuits and Cody just had to return out of default?!” said Courtney. “You need to chillax like Chef, gurl” said Chris. In the confessional, Chris said: “I sound like LeShanwa”.

“Chillax?!” said Courtney. “Okay. Your first challenge is to get food and return here. They must be edible. The team with the most food wins the first challenge. GO!” said Chris. Everyone ran, except Chris and Cody. “The word GO means go” said Chris. “I know that” said Cody. “So, go” said Chris. “I don’t know what team I am on” said Cody. “Just go to the… Grips!” said Chris. “But I won’t be with Lindsay” said Cody. In the confessional, Chris said: “What is with all of these dudes and Lindsay?!”

“Do you want to win or lose? I can easily call LeShawna back” said Chris. Cody ran off to his team. “Here’s the gameplan, now that Owen is gone, we need someone to eat food and smell food. Anybody?” said Izzy. In the confessional, Heather said: “Why are we looking for an Owen replacement?” “I guess I will!” said Izzy. “Are you going to eat my lipstick?” said Lindsay. “YES!” said Izzy. In the confessional, Heather said: “A scary Owen replacement”. “No!” said Lindsay. “Team. Here’s the gameplan. Chris said nothing about going in the craft services tent and stealing some food. So, just sneak it and take some food and bring it back, okay all?!” said Heather. “Okay” said Izzy. “And then I am going to eat them all up!” said Izzy, running in. “No” said Heather. The rest of the team went in and took some food.

“Ribs!” said Izzy. “Don’t think about it” said Heather. “Sooo good!” said Izzy. “Stop” said Heather. “They are just looking at me and smiling. They want me to eat them. Oh Izzy will my friends, oh Izzy will” said Izzy. In the confessional, Webby said: “Why are we acting like Owen died? Just because Izzy pushed him into the street and how he has a cast and sling on doesn’t mean he’s dead”.

Cody caught up with the Grips. “What do you want, geek?” said Courtney. In the confessional, Cody said: “She talked to me!” “Want? I am on your team” said Cody. In the confessional, Courtney said: “No way”. “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE” screamed Sadie, giving Cody a bear hug.

“This is our gameplan. We are going to split up in teams of two. Trent and Gwen, you can be one team” said Courtney. In the confessional, Trent said: “This is great. I made up a song for Gwen yesterday night”. In the confessional, Gwen said: “Do they purposely pair me and Trent together? Well, it can get worse like working with Heather. That cow’s nose is ten inches”.

“Actually, Sadie, Tyler and Cody can all go together. I would like to do something myself for a minute or two” said Courtney. In the confessional, Tyler said: “What’s up with her?” In the confessional, Courtney dialed up her lawyers and said, “So episode fifteen? Thanks. No vacations”. “Good, he better be placed on our team again” said Courtney, hanging up her PDA. Trent and Gwen found some water on the ground and collected some chips. “We found some water and chips” said Trent. Gwen nodded. “Bring it back” said Courtney, dialing her PDA. In the confessional, Gwen said: “She’s crazed with that thing”.

Over the loudspeaker, Chris said: “You have thirteen minutes”. “What?!” said Courtney. “Time flies when you are in the jungle” said Chris. “That’s not a funny joke” said Courtney. Tyler tried to hold his laughing in. “Stop blabbering and search for food. The Gaffers have a lot of food and they are done” said Chris. “What?!” said Courtney. “Twelve minutes” said Chris. “Argh. This is not going as I planned!” said Courtney. “We have no time, they are done, I have no idea where my team is or what they are doing and--“ said Courtney, walking into a coconut tree.

Coconuts fell off, even one that was Mr. Coconut. “Not you again” said Courtney. In the Aftermath studio, Owen said: “I told you I would never let go”. Noah then commented, “Coconuts don’t talk or do anything, get that in your mind already”.

“Anyways, let’s move on to challenge two!” said Chris, handing everyone out costumes made out of grass. “What’s this for?” said Webby. “For your next challenge” said Chris. “Wait, so we are taking off our clothes and wearing this?!” asked Courtney. Chris handed her a bra. “There” said Chris. “You happy?” he continued. “No” said Courtney. “What now?” said Chris. “I demand to wear clothes” said Courtney. “Then, you will lose the challenge for your team and do you want that to happen?” said Chris. “I have my lawyers on my PDA. I can call and they can begin to sue you!” said Courtney. “What happened to the friendly Courtney with manners?!” said Chris.

“What happened to the election and who lost?! Tell me smart guy!” said Courtney. “You are about to make me kick you off the show” said Chris. “Fine, just give me the grass” said Courtney. Chris handed her the costumes. Everyone changed. “This next challenge is a vine swinging one. Whoever stops at the stop signs and follows the safety laws wins the challenge for their team. Please note how the Grips have to sit at least one person out for the challenge. Who will it be?” said Chris.

In the confessional, Courtney said: “Who should sit out? Sadie is large and Cody will just fall off paying attention to the ladies but Tyler sucks at these challenges. I am going to pick…” “Sadie!” said Courtney. “We didn’t even vote” said Trent. “We didn’t have to!” said Courtney. “But I want to help!” said Sadie. “But you are helping by sitting out” said Courtney. “I want to help win for the team” said Sadie. “Tough luck, this is helping” said Courtney. “I’ll sit out for the lady” winked Cody, sitting. In the confessional, Sadie said: “That was so nice of Cody, but what happens if we lose?”

In the confessional, Cody said: “I am confident that I am doing a good thing for the team!” “No” said Courtney. “Sadie is sitting out and that is it!” said Courtney. “Let’s have Cody sit out” said Tyler. “Fine, but if we lose. You four better vote with me” said Courtney, talking to Tyler, Gwen and Trent. “Deal!” they said. In the confessional, Courtney said: “I better get ranked number one this episode in Mike’s Power Ranking Site!”

“Can I go first, because tomorrow is my birthday?!” asked Lindsay. “That is so cool! Tomorrow is a Friday and it’s the thirteenth of October. Haha, so spooky. Maybe that’s how you got so dumb, no offense. My birthday is May 2. Haha, it felt like yesterday when I was born” said Izzy, speed-talking. Everyone stared at Izzy. “You didn’t know I remembered when I was born? My dad cut his ear and he was in the hospital right next to my mom!” said Izzy. Everyone still stared at Izzy. “Never happened to you? Okay!” said Izzy.

“Lindsay and Sadie! Round one. Fastest around the course wins a point for their team. Remember to follow the laws” said Chris. “Liars?!” said Lindsay. “The LAWS” said Chris. “Okay” said Lindsay. “And GO!” said Chris. Lindsay stopped right away at the stop sign, as Sadie speeded around the course. In the confessional, Courtney said: “This is what I meant. Lindsay is so loony, she can win and Sadie does whatever her heart desires!”

“Lindsay automatically gets a point for her team. Sadie went on and didn’t see the stop sign!” said Chris. “What do we do?” asked Lindsay. Lindsay walked away, as her team high-fived her. In the confessional, Tyler said: “Lindsay looks so hot in that grass costume!” “Two more points and the Gaffers win immunity!” said Chris. “Who’s up next? Courtney, Webby, Izzy, Tyler, G-“ said Chris. “I will” said Gwen, sighing. “Me!” said Webby. In the confessional, Webby had dirt and grass on his face. “Who knew the vines were spaghetti?” he said.

Webby and Gwen got on the vines. “Be ready to lose!” said Webby. “Yeah right” said Gwen. “GO!” said Chris. Webby fell right away on to the ground. “I never knew we were so up here!” said Sadie. Heather facepalmed. In the confessional, Heather said: “What use is Webby?!” In the confessional, Webby said: “I guess I can move into stand up comedy”.

“It’s now tied one to one!” said Chris. “Whover makes it to three wins first gets immunity!” said Chris. In the confessional, Courtney said: “I am throwing this challenge. The person I am convincing the team to vote for doesn’t last a chance”.

“Who’s up now?” said Chris. “I am!” said Izzy. In the confessional, Heather said: “Joy”. I can go I guess” said Trent. “Cool with me!” said Courtney. In the confessional, Courtney said: “Because Trent is not an athlete! And he’ll lose and then I’ll face Heather and I’ll lose, unless she spazzes out with her hair again”.

“And GO!” said Chris. Izzy stopped for a second and begun to zoom around. She paused and slowed down again. Trent begun to move around and take some action. However, he fell like Webby. “Ow” said Webby. “No fair. Can I do it again?!” said Izzy. “No” said Chris. In the confessional, Courtney said: “All as planned”. In the confessional, Heather said: “Does she want us to lose?” In the confessional, Trent wiped off his shirt and found a napkin. He wiped off the dirt from his face. In the confessional, a worried Gwen said: “Poor Trent”.

“Okay, the Gaffers are winning with two, but its not over for the Grips with one” said Chris. In the confessional, Courtney said: “Chris is wrong. It is over!” “So, Courtney and Heather. Will you get on the vines?” said Chris. In the confessional, Chris said: “Time for another female evil person drama moment”.

“GO!” said Chris. Courtney went ahead and Chris said, “The Gaffers win immunity! I’ll see the Grips in the Gilded Chris Ceremony after they change and decide who they are voting for in the next two hours!” The Gaffers smiled and cheered, as the Grips went into the craft services tent. “So, we are voting for…” said Courtney, whispering someone’s name to Tyler, Trent and Gwen. “Fine” they said. In the confessional, Courtney said: “I have this planned! I am so evil!”

In the Gilded Chris Ceremony, Chris said: “The four people who are safe are Courtney, Trent, Gwen and Tyler!” They all went up and got their Gilded Chris’. In the confessional, Courtney said: “I can see this as a perfect time to make an alliance!”

“Cody, Sadie, this is the final Gilded Chris and it goes to…” said Chris.

“CODY!” said Chris. Cody got his Gilded Chris and in the confessional, said: “I feel bad for Sadie, but it’s better her than me! I always miss the ladies!” “Bye you Gilded Chris eating freaks!” cried Sadie. “I love happy endings!” said Chris. “You call this happy dude. How sad?” said Trent.

Sadie walked into the lame-o-sine and there was Sadie. “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” they squealed. “SHUT UP!” yelled Heather. The lame-o-sine drove away and everyone remained silent. “Join us next time for more of the dumb Aftermath” whispered Chris.

Chapter 12: The Aftermath: 2

The Total Drama Action Aftermath intro played.
“Poopydoo, relax. Remember to make the audience some cookies after you are finished speaking!” said DJ’s mother backstage.
“Yes mama!” said DJ, in the Aftermath studio’s kitchen.
“Now, how do I find the host table?” said DJ’s mother.
An intern guided her to the host table.
"Welcome to Total Drama something Aftermath!" said DJ's mother.

“Chris said I can host!” said Beth.
DJ’s mother sat down and said, “I guess there was a change of plans”.
Beth sighed.
“If you clean the bathroom, maybe next time” said DJ’s mother.
“Chores? I thought this was summer vacation!” said Beth.
DJ’s mother walked up to Beth and slapped her.
"It’s fall break. This is what happens when you skip school. You need to remember stuff like that and how to wipe your shoes” said DJ’s mother.
Beth said, “Sorry”.

DJ’s mother walked back to the gold host table.
“I wonder how they afforded for this” she said.
“DJ’s mother, can you introduce us?” asked LeShawna.
“You think DJ’s momma is ready?”
“Kinda, gurl”.
“Well, I don’t know what to do now” said DJ’s mother.
Beth facepalmed herself.
“That is not nice” said DJ’s mother.
An intern walked to DJ’s mother and whispered something to her.
“Okay, so: Last time on Total Drama… Action!” said DJ’s mother.

“It rained and nobody dried their shoes. I afford for a bus and people don’t wipe their shoes. That makes me mad. But I don’t get why they don’t get mad and they don’t clean it up. There’s germs and it’s dirtier!” said DJ’s mother.
An intern whispered something else to DJ’s mother.

“Justin quit, everyone went on a scary ride without appropriate costumes, there was no safety and someone got hurt and some freak who tries to stalk girls returned. That is not safe to the girls in the game. Oh yeah, girl who squeals left and also, my own Poopydoo left on a very unfair vote!” said DJ’s mother.

“Introduce me you… Ms. Safety!” said Noah.
“I need some soap!” said DJ’s mother.
An intern ran over with a bar of soap.
DJ’s mother walked up to Noah and said: “Meet Ms. Bar… of Soup”.
“What is she going to do? Join the competition like that coconut of Owen’s?” said Noah.
DJ’s mother suddenly put it in his mouth.
“We’ll be right back” she winked.

A few minutes later, DJ’s mother removed the soap in Noah’s mouth and said: “We’re back”.
Noah fainted.
“Probably the germ buds” said DJ’s mother.
“Now, let’s introduce my husband… Justin” said DJ’s mother.
DJ, baking cookies and listening to this said: “Justin is not your husband. Remember how he was the great great great great GREAT great cousin of George Washington?”
“My bad son” said DJ’s mother.

The oven begun to smoke up. “Manuals! MAUNALS!” yelled DJ, running around for cookbooks.

Justin walked out and said, “Hey all”.
“You are acting like that? I mean, can’t you have more personality” said DJ’s mother.
Justin took off his shirt.
“Like that?” said Justin.
DJ’s mother nodded, looking closely at Justin.
Someone in the audience threw a pan at her.
“Hey. I warned everyone by email about the rules of the pan” said DJ’s mother, pressing a button.
The person who threw the pan flew up in the air again.

“Let’s play Truth or Hug!” said DJ’s mother.
“Umm… hug?” said Justin.
“You know that game, do you?” said DJ’s mother.
“No, but I know truth or dare” said Justin.
“Don’t say that d word in here, it is very unsafe!” said DJ’s mother, angrily.
“Sorry” said Justin, rolling his eyes.
"Your eyes are having communication problems, huh? That is not a nice way to move them around” said DJ’s mother.

“First question; should Courtney be a crossing guard?” said DJ’s mother.
“Screw this” said Justin, sitting down.
“Someone wants a hug?” said DJ’s mother.
“A huggie wuggie?” said Harold.
“That is not what I said” said DJ’s mother.
DJ’s mother walked near Justin and an intern ran to DJ’s mother and whispered something else to her.
“A guest has to ask a question!” she said.
“OOH! ME! ME! MEE!” said a girl with purple hair in the front row.

“Did your mother tell you that purple hair is an insult to people who barfed in the car in the summer of ’07?” said DJ’s mother.
“I am a fan of 2007. The year of… bugs and birds and births and deaths and Michael Jackson and…” said the girl.
“Just ask the question already” said Noah.
"Can I introduce myself?” she asked. “No” said DJ’s mother and Justin.
“Okay, my name is Sierra and I am a giant fan of Justin. I have 27 blogs on his face, butt, nose, hands, feet and how hawt he looks!” said Sierra.

Justin ran away into the Aftermath studio.
Sierra said: “I didn’t even explain how I had one more blog than Ezekiel that LeShawna’s butt”. LeShawna growled to Ezekiel.
Ezekiel pat LeShawna and said: “Very well LeShawna!”
LeShawna moved near Harold and whispered, “That guy is freaky”.
Harold nodded, as Ezekiel picked his nose.

“Take that finger outta there!” said DJ’s mother.
“Sorry, just digging for gold, eh” said Ezekiel.
A fire continued to burn down the kitchen
. “I am sorry I let you down mama!” said DJ.
“Next is our very own Poopydoo!” said DJ’s mom.
“Poopydoo?” said LeShawna.
“Poop in my shoe?” said Ezekiel.
“Poopydoo?” said DJ’s mother.
DJ put mama spice on the fire, which went out.
“Gotta always have your momma spice!” said DJ.
DJ opened the oven and found his cookies.
He took it and closed it.
The fire continued.

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” said DJ, running to the stage and jumping off.
He ran outside. “Wonder what got into him” said DJ’s mother.
“Probably a germ attacked his mama spice” she continued.
"Let’s move on to that kid who ate too much food and then… got hurt because of an unsafe dangerous challenge!” said DJ’s mother.

Owen didn’t come out.
“Where is he?” she said.
Owen said, “can use some help”.
“Ew, I am not wiping your behind. Didn’t your mother teach you how to do that? When Poopydoo was three years old, I taught him how to do it. When Poopydoo was five years old, he got ahold of my husband’s boxers!” said DJ’s mother.
“I mean, with the wheelchair” said Owen.
“Okay” said an intern, pushing Owen into DJ’s mother.

“That was unsafe” said DJ’s mother on the ground.
“Let’s take a break, before DJ’s mother finds out I didn’t wipe my shoes!” said Owen.
“WHAT?!” she yelled.

A few minutes later, DJ’s mother said: “We are back!”
“And my shoes are cleaned!” said Chris.
“Yay!” said Ezekiel.
“Let’s ask some questions to Owen. This is called Truth or Hug. If you lie—“ said DJ’s mother.

“Okay. It was ME! ALL ME! I was the one who ate the last cookie when I was four, even though the teacher said I was going to get gas! And I sat on my mom’s purse once and everything was squished! And I clogged all the bathrooms in the hotel. I stole one video game and I didn’t know it until now! I am sorry! But the worst thing was that I… killed… THE SHOW! I killed the That’s So Not Raven show!” said Owen.

“Well, no hugs for you this time. You admitted a lot of things” said DJ’s mother.
“I was aiming toward the hug. I didn’t really sit on my mom’s purse once. I did twice” said Owen.
DJ’s mother hugged Owen. “Ew, if you need to fart, please not toot in here” she said, smacking Owen.
“Hehe, sorry” said Owen.

Owen walked out. “Okay, next is Sadie!” said DJ’s mother.
Sadie walked out of the waiting room and saw Justin.
“OH EM GEE!” she yelled.
DJ’s mother signaled for a pan.
“EEE! EEE! EEEK!” Sadie kept yelling.
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” said Sadie, hugging Justin.
An intern ran over with a pan.
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” said Sadie, before getting hit by a pan.

“Use an inside voice!” said DJ’s mother.
Katie and Sadie hugged.
Sadie waved to the audience and walked to DJ’s mom, who smashed a pan in her face.

“Time for a few questions!” said DJ’s mother.
“Who are you again?” asked Sadie.
“Poopydoo’s mother” said DJ’s mother.
Ezekiel laughed to himself. “Poo” he said.
Harold giggled.
“Wait, there’s a Mrs. Poopydoo?” said Sadie.
"That’s his mom, right?” said DJ’s mother.
“I guess” said Sadie.
“That’s me!” said DJ’s mother.
Sadie and Katie glared at each other.

Katie pulled out a lightsaber and ran to DJ’s mom.
DJ’s mom took the lightsaber and threw it out.
"Those are really unsafe for kids. Your parents allow you to watch HORRIBLE movies like that?” asked DJ’s mom.
Sadie nodded.
“They should be ashamed. Poopydoo watches Funky Monkey, Spending Time, The Great Outdoors, Artz, Tips For Tests and BunnieLand!” said DJ’s mom.

“Those are dumb movies” said Sadie.
“But they are educational and open minded!” said DJ’s mom.
An intern pointed at his watch. “Good, I need to find Poopydoo. Join us next time for Total Drama… something” said DJ’s mother.
She then ran off the stage and passed someone.
She then said, “Why did you not wipe your shoes?”
She continued to run for DJ, as the studio burned down.

“Not again!” said Chris, later on.

Chapter 13: Ocean’s Eight – Not Nine

“Last time on Total Drama Action, Cody returned to the game and we went wild, well… Sadie did. In the end, the Grips lost yet again and Sadie got eliminated. Man, does Courtney know how to play the game? Anyways, now we are moving on to episode thirteen on Total Drama ACTION!” said Chris.

The scene suddenly moved to Courtney, on her PDA. She said, “He better come back. Fifteen thousand bucks, right? Yes, good. Now, give me the code combination. WHAT?! I AM PAYING YOU HALF OF THE MILLION IF I WIN!” She hung up her PDA and walked to the confessional.

“She has issues, more anger management issues than Eva and Rich Nixardon combined!” said Chris. In the confessional, Courtney said: “They aren’t giving me ways to win or helping me out! ARGH!”

(theme song plays)

Everyone woke up and went to the craft services tent. An intern snuck into the girls trailer and found Heather’s wallet on her bunk bed. The intern picked up seventy dollars and ran off. In the confessional, the intern said: “Seventy bucks! Boo-yah!”

Another intern snuck into the craft services tent and hit Cody with a pan, when nobody was looking. Cody fell to the ground and an intern dragged him away. Suddenly, Lindsay said: “I have to use the bathroom!” “You can at least go without saying it” said Heather.

Lindsay walked out and an intern hit her with a pan and dragged her away. Ten minutes passed. “Where’s Lindsay?” said Izzy. “She probably used the bathroom in the confessional again” said Heather. “I remember when I used the bathroom in the pool last summer! Haha!” said Izzy. “That was gross” said Heather.

Chris dropped in on the cast. “Sweet entrance” said Trent. “Today’s challenge is the classic bank heist challenge and—“ said Chris. “I knew we shouldn’t have voted Duncan off you loons! I knew he could’ve been useful! You people don’t know how to make decisions. Let’s see a challenge the Sadie would be good at… oh yeah, NOTHING!” said Courtney. “Chill out” said Chris. “I am not ‘chilling’ out. I am chilled out already!” said Courtney.

“Doesn’t seem that way” said Tyler. “Shut up” said Courtney. “Both of you shut up, before I will boot both of you off the show, myself” said Chris. “I have lawyers, I can easily return to the show” said Courtney. “What happened if I used a few of them as interns and they got eaten by the sharks?” said Chris. “YOU WHAT?!” said Courtney. “Chill” said Chris.

“Can you just announce the challenge, Queenie over there can have her ten seconds of fame next year” said Heather. “Okay, so today’s movie theme is the bank heist challenge and both teams must do three things to win immunity, the fastest team wins! They must unlock try to get the missing competitor on their respectful team out, try to get some money from the little intern and—“ said Chris. “Money? Oh please, this show is broke” said Heather. In the confessional, Gwen said: “Her mom is probably broke”.

“Can I get through this?” said Chris. “Yes!” said Trent. “Okay, and run off. Make a go-cart and race to the finish. Immunity is on the line!” said Chris. “I don’t see any missing competitor” said Courtney. “What about Cody?” said Trent, looking around. “He’s probably looking for Lindsay” said Courtney. “Lindsay was in the bathroom about twenty minutes ago and isn’t back” said Heather.

In the confessional, Tyler said: “NOOOOO! This is it! NOOOOO! She made out with Cody!” “Well, go to studio thirteen and we’ll begin!” said Chris.

Everyone walked to studio thirteen and Chris said: “GO!” “There’s twenty bank heists, where is Lindsay?” said Izzy, looking around. In the bank heist, Lindsay said: “Is this the basement of the mall? I still don’t see rats or anything, but I think they cleaned it out and put me in it!” In the bank heist, Cody said: “My team is probably all worried about me, especially Courtney. She’s probably freaking out because I am gone!”

Izzy, hearing Lindsay ran to the Gaffers and said: “I THINK I FOUND HER!” Izzy and the Gaffers ran to the correct bank heist. “Is this Sally Shoelace?” said Lindsay. “It’s your team” said Heather. “HANNAH! I never knew you liked to hang out in the mall!” said Lindsay. “This is not a mall, you fool” said Heather. “It’s full? I don’t think the mall is full, I think me and you are the only ones here” said Lindsay.

“I SAID FOOL!” said Heather. “The mall isn’t a fool, that’s also mean Heather. I can hear it crying, can you say sorry?” said Lindsay. “Maybe I can say SHUT UP!” said Heather. Heather and her voice opened the heist’s door. “EEEEEEEEEE! LET’S GO SHOPPING!” said Lindsay. “No” said Heather. Lindsay skipped her way and crashed into Cody’s bank heist. “Courtney, is that you?” said Cody.

“I don’t eat corn, sorry” said Lindsay, walking away with her team. “Hello, anybody?” said Cody. The Grips ran to each heist and knocked on the door. “We have no time for this” said Courtney. “We need to find Cody” said Trent. “Chris said try and we tried, now let’s move on. Either way, the Gaffers are ahead of us!” said Courtney.

The Gaffers ran to the intern and Heather said, “Where did you get that money?” “Somewhere” said the intern. “I think he is lying. Lindsay, bite him!” said Heather. “But I am not a dog” said Lindsay. “BITE HIM!” said Heather. “Okay” said Lindsay. “Fine, here’s the money!” said the intern, throwing Heather the money. Heather looked at the money closely. “You stole that money from me!” said Heather. The intern got sweaty. “No I didn’t” he said.

“BITE HIM!” yelled Heather. “Can I lick my tail now that I am your dog?” said Lindsay. “JUST BITE HIM!” yelled Heather. Lindsay barked at the intern. “How do you know that money is your’s?” said the intern. “My money isn’t dirty at all. Not one percent of it is dirty. And no money in the world is like that except mine!” said Heather. “Well, I see a dark spot” said the intern. “Your dreaming fool. Lindsay, bite him” said Heather.

“My dreams are never full Heather!” said Lindsay. “I was talking to him” said Heather, pointing at the intern. “Ooooh!” said Lindsay. “Dogs don’t talk, now bite him!” said Heather. “I so must try this on my seventy nine year old sister” said Izzy. Meanwhile, Courtney and the Grips (excluding Cody) came to the area. “Well, it’s time to go” said Lindsay. “Dogs don’t talk” said Heather. “But Heather” said Lindsay. “Lick your butt and don’t talk” said Heather.

Heather dragged Lindsay to the go-karts. In the vault, Cody said: "They will be here any minute now... any minute". “AFTER THEM!” yelled Courtney. “My arm hurts” said Trent. “My stomach hurts” said Gwen. “My body hurts” said Tyler. “You guys are so weak, we are going to lose this challenge if we don’t go after them!” said Courtney. “We can all send you home Ms. Princess” said Gwen. Trent nodded.

“Let’s just work as a team and win the challenge” said Courtney. “For Duncan!” said Courtney. “What? No, why not for LeShawna!” said Gwen. “Yeah, for LeShawna!” said Trent. Tyler nodded. “But she didn’t play the game” said Courtney. “Are you in this or not?” said Gwen. “Fine” said Courtney. “For LeShawna!” she continued. In the vault, Cody said: "Maybe Courtney has to tie her shoes, I like her shoes. They are as cute as her".

Heather threw a stick in front of Lindsay, who was tied up in the go-kart. “Go fetch the stick!” said Heather. “But I don’t eat sticks” said Lindsay. “Get used to it” said Heather. Lindsay ran with the go-kart and fetched the stick. “Now give me the stick” said Heather. “This is going to take forever” said Webby. Izzy nodded. “Can we use the wheel?” said Webby. “Can we use the shut up?!” said Heather.

The Grips put black ink under their eyes. “It’s showtime!” said Courtney, charging toward the go-karts. “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” yelled Tyler, running toward the go-karts. “Can we shut up?” said Courtney. “Sorry, I was in the… mood” said Tyler. Gwen and Trent ran to the go-kart. “Now, who’s driving?” said Courtney. “I know how to drive” said Tyler.

“I saw your audition last week and you crashed your car in the local mall” said Courtney. “NOOOOOOOO! That’s how Molly’s Shirt Shop closed?” said Lindsay. "I am sorry Lindsay" said Tyler. Lindsay cried. “Lick your butt and shut up” said Heather to Lindsay. Lindsay ran to the Grips and their go-kart. “No, no, no, no, no, NO!” yelled Heather, as the kart crashed into the Grips. “What now?” she said. “BUILD!” said Izzy. "They still amy be looking for me" said Cody, in the vault. “The car isn’t that bad” said Gwen to Courtney.

“The bottom is all gone!” said Courtney. “We can act like the Flinstones and run!” said Tyler. Everyone laughed. “No, seriously” said Tyler. “You’re in charge, if we lose, you go home!” said Courtney. “Now, sing the Flinstones theme song” said Tyler, beginning to run.

“Here comes Courtney!” said Gwen, Trent and Courtney. “No, no, no! It’s the rock song. I WANNA ROCK AND ROLL, YEAH!” said Tyler. “I don’t do ‘rock’, I don’t do ‘roll’, I sing” said Courtney. “And I won’t run and win!” said Tyler. “Fine” said Courtney. The team ran and sung the Flinstones theme, as Izzy went nuts building a new go-kart.

“Heather, I have a problem” said Lindsay. Heather stared at her. “What if I have to use the bathroom?” asked Lindsay. “Do it on Chris’ lawn or something” said Heather. “Do you know where he lives?” said Lindsay. “I have an old paper bag you can use” said Heather. “I won’t use the bathroom on that” said Lindsay. “Well, I guess we can wait in the car” said Heather, eating some chocolate. Lindsay tried to take a piece.

“Dogs can have chocolate” said Heather. Lindsay wept. “Go home” said Heather. “This is my home” said Lindsay, looking at the far away trailers. Heather pointed at the local doghouse. “I don’t have to live in there, do I?” said Lindsay. “Yes, you do” said Heather. “Can I live in the mall?” said Lindsay. “Of course—“ said Heather. “YAY!” said Lindsay, running off. “Not” said Heather, rolling her eyes. “See you in five million years!” said Lindsay, running off. In the confessional, Heather said: “She is so loony, that she can have her own show called Loony Lindsay Toons!”

In the vault, Cody said: "Do they have a problem with the Code-ster? I doubt it. They may think I am too good for them. I am much better than Harold and Tyler in sports and I don't fart as much as Owen. I am perfect!" The Grips soon, were halfway. “YES!” said Courtney. However, the Grips kart begun to broke down. “HURRY GUYS! I DON’T THINK IT CAN LAST LONGER” yelled Courtney. Tyler, next to Courtney said: “Ow, my ears hurt. Can’t you say this normally?” “Can you stop talking and start winning?!” said Courtney.

“Done!” said Izzy. “Great” said Heather. “Let me drive” said Webby. “Fine” said Heather. Lindsay ran back to the spot where the Gaffers built the kart and they took off. Lindsay barked and chased after the car. “I think we may hit her” said Izzy, a bit concerned. “Don’t worry, I have this!” said Webby, crashing onto a tree.

Everyone got out of the kart and Lindsay ate a leaf. In the vault, Cody begun to freak out. "GET ME OUTTA HERE!" he yelled. In the confessional, Heather said: “Maybe Lindsay can take us to the finish line”. Heather lifted the tree trunk up and Webby asked her: “What are you doing?” “Making us win!” said Heather. “GO FETCH!” said Heather, throwing the tree trunk toward the finish line. “That’s too heavy” said Lindsay. “I don’t care” said Heather. “The GRIPS WIN IMMUNITY!” Chris yelled suddenly.

“What?!” said Heather. “You heard me, the Grips win immunity! Isn’t that GREAT?!” said Chris. “Yes!” said the Grips. “No” said Heather. “Cast your votes by sundown!” said Chris. "Why is everyone cheering?" said Cody, in the vault.

In the Gilded Chris Ceremony, Chris said: “You only have four people on your team, soon to be three and the other team has five. You really need to win, but you are losers. What can I say?” “You can say a lot, like how did the intern steal my money?” said Heather. In the confessional, the intern said: “MOM! MOM!”

“Moving on, the first Chris goes to Izzy!” said Chris. Izzy walked to Chris and got her Gilded Chris. “Three people left, two Chris’ left” said Chris. “The next Chris goes to Heather!” said Chris. Lindsay shaked her butt.

“Calm down thing” said Heather, petting Lindsay. Lindsay begun to lick Heather. “GET OFF!” said Heather, throwing Lindsay to the ground. “Ow” said Lindsay. “Whoopsies” said Heather, rolling her eyes. In the confessional, Heather said: “If she ever does that to me again, we are so not having an alliance together”.

“The final Gilded Chris goes to…” said Chris.

Lindsay howled. “Lindsay” said Chris. Lindsay shaked her butt again and ran over to Chris, taking the Gilded Chris mouth first. Heather ran to Lindsay and gave the Gilded Chris back to Chris. “Dogs can’t have chocolate” smiled Heather. Lindsay howled again.

“Whatever, Webby. You are eliminated, but you get your one hundred thousand dollars from last season” said Chris. “Bye all!” said Webby, walking off to the lame-o-sine with a smile.

“Now, I need to go to jury duty and see Duncan tomorrow before the new Total Drama Action!” said Chris. Lindsay used the bathroom. “NOT ON MY SHOES!” yelled Heather. Chris chuckled.

Chef walked to Chris. "You know, I feel like we are forgetting something" said Chris. Chef thought of Cody and said, "We aren't". In the vault, Cody said: "I AM SCARED OF THE DARK! Courtney, if this is you, cut it out! You are freaking me out, what did I ever do to you?"

Chapter 14: Castmate War l

“Last time on Total Drama Action, we had an epic bank heist challenge and I loved it when Heather insulted that intern” said Chris. The angry intern said, “I quit the” and a bleep was used “show”. The intern walked away to the lame-o-sine. “Okay, weirdo… in the end, Heather and Lindsay played with bones and whatever and failed to win the challenge. Webby got eliminated, but not before he got his money from last season. Now, what was Courtney hiding? What will I tell the producers? WHAT AM I FORGETTING?! Join us now for Total Drama Action!” said Chris.

(theme song plays)

Heather woke up and walked next to the girls trailer. She slapped Lindsay in the face. “Ow!” said Lindsay, waking up. “Now, go fetch me your shampoo” said Heather. “But I am a dog on a mission. I type to my friend Stockwood or was it Stoodwock, what about Wacka Wacka Stood?” said Lindsay, taking out a typewriter.

“Just fetch me your shampoo” said Heather. “Fine” said Lindsay, walking to the girls trailer. Lindsay reached for her shampoo. Izzy, who was sleeping and next to it hugged it. Lindsay tried to take it, but Izzy was hugging too hard. “Hurry up!” complained Heather. “I’m trying” said Lindsay. Lindsay snatched it from Izzy and Izzy woke up.

Lindsay ran to Heather with the shampoo and Heather slapped Lindsay. “I said the orange shampoo, not the blue one that makes me look like some freak in Avatar” said Heather. Lindsay pouted. “It’s that time of week again” said Izzy, rolling her eyes.

Courtney woke up and called someone in her PDA. “So, when his he coming?” she said. “AN HOUR?! I can’t wait an HOUR! My chances of winning is going downhill without him. My team has loons!” said Courtney. Gwen grunted and mumbled a bad word, as she walked out of the girls trailer. “Someone’s moody today” said Heather. “Shut up, you look like some freak from Avatar” said Gwen, walking to the craft services tent.

In the guys trailer, Trent says: “It feels so empty in here”. Tyler nodded, walking behind Trent into the bathroom. Someone breathed over Trent. “Tyler, is that you?” said Trent, a bit nervous. “It’s your bestie!” said the stranger. “Gwen?” said Trent, turning around. “It’s Duncan, you idiot” said Duncan, rolling his eyes. In the confessional, Trent said: “Since when did Gwen turn into a Duncan?”

“Why are you here? Are you Izzy?” said Trent. “Little Miss CIT, in the other trailer made a lawsuit to allow me back in the game and I am through with it here. Dorks, nerds, freaks, CITs, did I mention dogs?” said Duncan. “Dogs? Is this a circus movie challenge or something?” said Trent. “No” said Duncan, walking to the craft services tent.

Once everyone arrived there, Courtney hugged Duncan. Chris in an army costume suddenly appeared. “Did Chris go down last week and is ready to die? I am ready to host this lame-o show!” said Heather. “No, Chris did not go down last week and I won’t die anytime soon. My hotness proves it, right Sar-Sierra?” said Chris. Sierra, stalking the cast nodded and ran off to stalk the cameraman. “Stalker” Chris whispered, looking around.

“So, are you saying you lost the war to her?” giggled Heather. “No. Today’s challenge is a war movie and that’s why I have this hot costume on” said Chris. In the confessional, Duncan said: “I love wars. It’s another word for fights!” In the confessional, Chef said: “And for you space nerd, it’s not Star Wars”.

“When are we doing some kind of a sporty challenge?” said Tyler. In the confessional, Tyler said: “I’ll rock at a sport movie! I even have rocks in my pocket to throw at the other team”.

“Why is he here?” said Heather, looking at Duncan. “For your information, I sued this show in order for him to return” said Courtney. In the confessional, Duncan said: “Freaky”. “Oh yeah, Duncan returned and is on the…” said Chris, pulling a sheet out of his pocket. “Screaming Gaffers!” Chris read.

“I sued the show to make him return and he is on the other team?! HOW UNFAIR IS THAT?!” said Courtney, sneezing. “Why is it so cold?” she said. “Today’s challenge is a war one like I said before. The first part of the challenge is a snowball fight! No godplaying” said Chris, staring at Duncan. In the confessional, Duncan said: “Why would I godplay?”

“Now, before I explain the challenge, are there any questions?” said Chris. “ME! ME!” said Lindsay. “Whatever, Lindsay” said Chris. “Can I eat the snow, because I am a dog?” said Lindsay. “Umm… that’ll mean you’re out” said Chris.

“Follow me” said Chris, walking outside. In the confessional, Chris said: “I know I am forgetting something”. Inside the vault in studio thirteen, Cody said: “THE GIRLS DON’T CARE! THE BOYS DON’T CARE… well, they may think I am too awesome for girls and NOBODY CARES! HELP ME SOMEBODY!” Chef kicked the door of studio thirteen and released Cody, who passed out.

Chef dragged Cody to Lindsay’s doghouse. “Nighty night” said Chef, laughing hardly.

Back in studio fourteen, Chris said: “Today’s challenge is a snowball fight and best out of three wins this first challenge. If you knock someone out, they are out and we have these awesome needles you use once you get knocked out! K? Good!”

“Let the throwing begin!” said Chris. In the confessional, Izzy said: “And if Big-O was here, he would’ve been like WOMP! WOMP! WOMP! And sit on people and be like WOMP! WOMP! WOMP! And win the challenge and then be like WOMP! WOMP! WOMP! again…”

Izzy threw one at Courtney, knocking her out. Heather washed Courtney’s face with snowballs. “No fair!” said Courtney, spitting out the snow. “Come on losers, there’s three of you left and you all fail!” said Heather.

“I am awesome any day of the week, right Lindsay?” said Tyler. “Each day, except Toolsday, Wednesday, Thursday, Fryday, Saturday and Sonday!” said Lindsay. “Since when is there a day cool Toolsday?” said Trent. “It’s the second day of the week, silly” said Lindsay, before Gwen threw a snowball at her.

“ARGH! DUMB DOG!” said Heather, kicking Lindsay away. In the confessional, Izzy said: “And I thought I was the only one here allowed to do animal abuse! Haha!”

Duncan threw a snowball at Trent and Tyler. “Down to just her” said Duncan, snickering. “WAIT A SECOND! CODY!” said Chris. Chris ran to the vault in studio thirteen. “Who’s in charge?” said Courtney. “I am! I am the best host there is!” said Heather. “Oh please, there’s more spotlight for me than all the parts of your blue skin combined” said Gwen. “I am not an Avatar freak, you goth girl!” said Heather, throwing a snowball directly at Gwen’s face. “We win!” said Izzy, running in circles.

Chris opened the vault and Cody wasn’t there. “He somehow got out” said Chris, walking around the set and noticing a doghouse next to the girls trailer. Chris looked at it and it read, “This Is My Doghouse, Because Hannah Thinks I Am A Dog, But I Am A Human Person, Love Lindsay!”

Chris looked inside the doghouse and found Cody, sleeping. “What the heck are you doing in there?” said Chris. Cody woke up, noticing he was kissing a picture of Lindsay. “For the record, I don’t like her. It was like that time in the special when someone found me cuddling Noah, when I was sleeping” said Cody, in the confessional. “Your team is probably failing, they need you!” said Chris. “MY TEAM!” said Cody, running to studio fourteen.

“Round two” said Chef, blowing his whistle. Lindsay rolled on the snow to the other side of the line, rolling toward Courtney. Courtney fell down. “Out again?!” said Courtney. “That is SO unfair. She crossed the other line!” said Courtney. “Both of you are out” said Chef. In the confessional, Duncan said: “Such a war, huh?”

Izzy threw snowballs at Gwen and Trent. Heather caught one by Tyler and threw one by his stomach. Tyler spit something out and fell to the ground. “I DEEM THE GAFFERS WINNERS OF THIS CHALLENGE!” said Chris. Cody somehow got lost and returned afterward. “Are you kidding me? Where were you?” said Courtney. “Maybe he was at the mall” said Lindsay, brightly. “You idiot, there’s no mall here” said Heather. “Back off from my babe!” said Tyler.

“Babe?” said Heather giggling. In the confessional, Lindsay had an angry face. “Nobody who calls me an idiot passes me about that. That was mean, especially after I cleaned out her blue underwars!” said Lindsay.

“This is the challenge that may lead the Gaffers to victory!” said Chris. Lindsay got up and smiled. “Get back down!” said Heather. A crane suddenly moved toward the girls trailer. “What’s happening?” said Gwen. The crane lifted up the girls trailer. “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! MY PDA! NOOOOOOOOOO!” said Courtney, running toward the crane.

In the confessional, Courtney had a cast on and was crying.

“COME BACK HERE!” said Courtney. The crane threw the girls trailer down toward the doghouse for Lindsay. “MY DOGHOUSE I GOT WEBBY TO WORK SO HARD FOR ME!” said Heather, running. “My typewriter!” said Lindsay, running toward the doghouse. “My notebook!” said Gwen, running. “The girls clear out fast” said Chris. Duncan nodded. “GWEN!” cried Trent, running after Gwen. “The girls!” said Cody, running after the girls. “LINDSAY!” said Tyler, running after the girls.

“And I thought the girls cleared out fast” said Chris. “I am still here” said Duncan.

In the confessional, Courtney said: “My PDA is gone… forever!” and she begun to cry.

In the confessional, Heather said: “Now, I need a litter box, and I know the person to make it”, looking out the window at Tyler.

In the confessional, Lindsay said: “I guess I don’t have to act like dogs anymore, but I do want another squeaky!”

In the confessional, Gwen said: “Not like I had any sketches of Trent in there”.

A few minutes later, everyone returned and Chris said, “Well, ummm… I guess everyone is moving in with the guys!” “NO!” said Heather. In the confessional, Heather said: “Guys are gross, farty, smelly, stinky, but I have more chances to make fun of them than the girls”.

In the confessional, Cody said: “Me and the girls! Awesome!” “This is the final challenge, jump off this plane that I will take you in…” said Chris, before a cut to the confessional: “Not like we are using it for something else”.

“And you’ll jump off it one million feet high, more than the cliff last season. And don’t worry, there’s a 300% percent chance you’ll die and a 459.9993345% you’ll get injured. Harold’s data was off by 459%” said Chris. “Nerds” said Duncan. Chris nodded.

In the plane, Chris showed everyone parachute shoots. “Is that another squeaky?!” said Lindsay. “No” said Chris. “Too bad” said Lindsay. “It’s the only way to survive!” said Heather. “Well, we are not using ‘em” said Chris, throwing them out the window.

Everyone gasped. “MY SQUEAKY!” said Lindsay. “It’s not a squeaky, idiot!” said Heather to Lindsay. In the confessional, Heather said: “I am using her and I can win this game without her”. In the confessional, Lindsay said: “Heather is really starting to become mean, I might not want to be her friend anymore and share lipstuff with her either”.

“Who’s first?” said Chris. “ME!” said Izzy, jumping out of the plane. “I AM QUEEN OF THE IRON MAN WORLD!” said Izzy, hitting the ground faster. In the confessional, Tyler said: “It’s time to impress Lindsay!” “Lindsay, watch this!” said Tyler, showing his muscles. “Oooh, I like watches!” said Lindsay, taking off Tyler’s watch. In the confessional, Tyler said: “She touched me! SHE TOUCHED ME!”

Tyler was about to jump off the plane, when Lindsay said: “You have another watch?!” Tyler nodded. Lindsay ran over and accidentally pushed Tyler off the plane. Lindsay fell off also. In the confessional, Tyler had a cast on and said: “Ow, she hurt me there, but her looks are still awesome!” Courtney walked up to Chris. “She’s heereee…” said Chris, whispering to himself.

“I refuse to do this” said Courtney. Lindsay landed and took Tyler’s other watch. “I love the pictures of you” said Lindsay. “Thanks” said Tyler, with a cast on. “Want me to sign?” said Lindsay. “Sure” said Tyler, finding a pen and grabbing it with his other arm and giving it to Lindsay.

Lindsay opened the marker and said: “Blue?! Heather hates blue, is there red? Heather likes red!” Tyler looked around and said: “No”. “Awww” said Lindsay, signing her name hard, making Tyler fall. In the confessional, Tyler said, with casts on both arms: “I don’t care if she did that to me, she’s still cute”. “Want me to sign your other cast?” said Lindsay. “One’s enough” smiled Tyler.

“Just jump you giant chicken” said Gwen. “Chicken? You shouldn’t be talking” said Courtney. “Watch this, I am jumping to make you shut the…” said Gwen. In the confessional, Cody said: “Never knew you could say that word on television”. “UP!” said Gwen, jumping off the plane.

“I won’t jump” said Courtney. “We need to win!” said Tyler. “And I need things MY way!” said Courtney. Heather was by the edge of the plane, when she got blown away to the ground. “That wasn’t bad” said Heather. In the confessional, Heather said: “That was awful. My nails lost its paint, Lindsay likes Jockhead and I need a new doghouse!”

Duncan jumped out and landed safe on the ground and did a rock on sign. “THE GAFFERS WIN IMMUNITY!” yelled Chris. “Wait, I can jump!” said Courtney, falling off the plane and getting hit on the side. In the confessional, Courtney had a wheelchair and a translator (Chef) next to her. Courtney said something and Chef said: “Not true”. “That’s not what I said!” said Courtney, kicking Chef. “Dumb translator”.

“Cast your votes now you chickens. And the total distance was not the billions of feet I told you, instead it was one foot. Haha, suckers!” said Chris.

In the Gilded Chris ceremony, Chris said: “Both Courtney and Trent racked up two votes, but someone racked up one more than the other!” Chris handed Gwen, Cody and Tyler Gilded Chris’.

“And Courtney is safe!” said Chris, handing Courtney an award. “THANK YOU!” said Courtney, as Chris put the Gilded Chris on her lap. In the confessional, Gwen got teary. In the confessional, Tyler said: “She was lucky I didn’t vote her out”.

“Right when I thought I was making friends with everybody” said Trent. “It’s called blindsiding” said Heather, walking to the ceremony, after listening in the guys trailer. “Without your boyfriend, you will easily lose and guess who’ll be the big winner? ME!” said Heather. “You should be talking Avatar-like hot dog princess” said Gwen.

“Bye Gwen” said Trent, leaning in for a kiss. Trent and Gwen were about to kiss when Heather slapped Gwen. “OW!” said Gwen. In the confessional, Trent said: “She can never have enough” and then sighed.

Gwen slapped Heather and Chef ran to the scene and threw Heather in the craft services tent. In the confessional, Chef said: “Well, I kinda like drama and kissing and… don’t judge me, foos!”

Gwen and Trent were about to lean in for a kiss, when Chris said: “Trent, you have to take the lame-o-sine outta here!” Trent sighed and said: “I will never forget you and will be rooting for you wherever the others were”. Trent entered the lame-o-sine, which took off. Gwen begun to cry. “It’s alright, Gwen” said Cody, smiling. Angrily, Gwen punched Cody in the face and walked off. In the confessional, Cody said: “I get locked in a vault for five days and now get punched in the face, I guess my number one ticket to Dateville has someone, maybe one day…”

In the confessional, Heather took out a banana peel from her mouth and said: “Chef is so going to pay, but not before I eliminate Gwen. She is going down, especially not with her date”. In the confessional, Cody said: “Maybe I can break Gwen and Trent up somehow, not trying to be mean and dirty. It’s just, Gwen wants me. I saw her face in day one, she was scared when I got hurt in day two and I helped her when she was upset this season, or at least I will!”

In the control room, Chris said: “Ooh, I want to see this! Join us next time for more Total Drama Action, make sure you put Drama in bold font and extra big, because it’ll be big next time”.

Chapter 15: Million Dollar Babies

"Last time on Total Drama Action" said Chris. "Duncan returned to the show and who knew that Cody was locked in a vault. We had an epic war movie... well, not really, but I did get to show off my war costume and comment on and say how hot I was. In the end, the Gaffers won again and the Grips sent Trent to the walk of shame and to... somewhere. And also, please note how everyone is enjoying their sleep together in the guys trailer. Kthanksbye!" said Chris.

(theme song plays)

Chris blew a whistle. Heather hit the bunk above her. "Stupid Chris" she said, walking to Chris. Lindsay ran to Chris like a dog. "Lindsay, that is soooo 1986" said Heather. "But you told me to do it" said Lindsay. "It's 2010 already, you... dog!" said Heather. In the confessional, Lindsay said: "I like it how everyone is named after an animal! Beth is a cow, I am a dog and Owen is a... pig".

Chris blew his whistle again. "Can you stop doing that?!" said Heather. Everyone walked out of the trailer. "Hussle! Hussle MOVE!" said Chris. "It's only..." said Courtney, looking at her watch. "Seven in the morning" said Courtney. "All athletes wake up early!" said Chris. Tyler nodded. "Athletes including Tyler" said Chris. Tyler said: "Not true". Lindsay nodded. "Are you siding with him?" said Heather. "No, but he's kinda cute" said Lindsay.

In the confessional, Lindsay said: "That was an accidential sleep with Tyler last night, I won't do it again!" Chef handed out everyone pasta in a ball. "Ewww!" said Courtney. "Pasta for breaky?!" said Lindsay. Chris nodded. "What happened to Frosted Flakes?" said Lindsay. "We shot the tiger" said Chris. Lindsay gasped.

"PAPARAZZI?"! "No, before they run to the gym!" said Chris. "Where's the gym in this broken down place?" said Courtney. "Follow me" said Chris. Everyone followed Chris into studio fifteen. Studio fifteen featured a dummy (Chef) and a field with wires leftover from the war challenge. Everyone gasped. "What, I am saving the world" said Chris.

"So, anyways: Today's challenge is a sport movie, but before that Mr. Chef Is... A Crappy Guy Whatever Hatchet is going to teach you on sports, by watching the best movie of all time... well, one of them!" said Chris. In a classroom, by the field, Chef said: "Ignore him, now: let's win this stupid challange and do the trash!" "Seriously?" said Heather. "Oh please" said Courtney.

"Anybody like Badmintion?" said Chef. "Is that the movie with the blue people?" said Lindsay. "That's Avatar, right Heather?" said Gwen. Heather took a small mirror from Chef's pocket and looked at herself. "Yes" said Heather, throwing the mirror down. Chef put on the movie and everyone watched it. In the confessional, Heather said: "That was the dumbest". In the confessional, Courtney said: "Stupidest". In the confessional, Lindsay said: "Awesomest movie I have ever saw!"

Everyone walked out and Chris said: "Was your favorite part when I kicked butt on the interns?" In the confessional, Chef cried: "Why did he have to retire when the intern took over in the front office?" "Anyways, time to workout. Run three laps in the previous two studios and this one!" said Chris. Everyone ran around the three studios within one hour three times. Everyone was sweaty. "LeShawna wouldn't have stood a chance. She'd be on the floor sweaty and crying for noodle" said Heather.

"That was some nice words there Heather" said Gwen, rolling her eyes. "Your mom probably misses you and is saying a lot of nice things back at home" said Heather. "Your first mother probably left you in a dumpster and some lady who was a garbage lady found you in the garbage center and took you home. No wonder why you have blue skin" said Gwen, snickering. "You little--" said Heather.

Chris walked over. "Girls, girls. No need to fight right now. Why not when we return in Total Drama Action!" said Chris.

A few minutes later, Chris said: "We are back!" In the confessional, Heather said: "I could've played it Homer Simpson style, but I wouldn't want her cheap family to cry. However, I should've stole their money. They'll be looking for a new son in the streets again. Like I was in a smelly, gross garbage truck and was in the garbage dump. But they do have good exchanges, like an old crappy flip flop for two hundred bucks. It's shopping time!"

"Okay, so now that you watched that awesome movie, we can move on to the sport movie challenges!" said Chris, pressing a button. A screen behind Chris showed the remaining campers paired up with someone on a different team, next to a sport. "You see the box above my hot head, huh?" said Chris. "Your head is hot?!" said Lindsay, poking at Chris. "Ummm... sexy hot" said Chris. "Ohhhhh!" said Lindsay. "So anyways, that is who you are against and the sport you'll play! Isn't that fun?!" said Chris. "No" said everyone.

"This won't count or anything, but since the producers needed more time and found these challenges short.... you have to push dumbies!!!" said Chris. "WHAT?!" said Heather. In the confessional, Heather said: "I don't push dumbies". "Do it or else you lose the challenge" said Chris. "Whatever" said Heather. "That's not dumb!" said Lindsay. "It's a dumbie, idiot" said Heather. Lindsay gasped.

In the confessional, Lindsay said: "Heather has been pretty mean, she even locked me in the bathroom the other day when I had to take a shower"! "Where's the dumbie?" asked Gwen. Chris pointed to Chef. "Chef is not a dumbie!" said Lindsay. "I know!" said Chef, angrily. "Yes, you are. Okay?" said Chris. "Eat it McLean" said Chef, throwing his sweaty shirt at Chris. "Whoever pushes Chef the farthest in ten seconds gets... nothing, but the losing team gets this sweaty shirt!" said Chris, taking off Chef's sweaty shirt.

"And the Grips go first, GO!" said Chris. The Grips pushed Chef fifteen feet. "Good job!" said Chris. "Let's see if the Gaffers can beat that!" said Chris. Duncan cracked his knuckles. "GO!" yelled Chris. Duncan pushed Chef all the way to twenty-nine feet and Chef fell down. "Awesome job Duncan!" said Chris. "Simple" said Duncan. "That is barely a dumbie, it fell down" said Heather. "NOT A DUMBIE!" yelled Chef.

"There you go!" said Chris, giving the Grips the sweaty shirt. In the confessional, Duncan said: "I really didn't care if we lost, because I'd give it to Lindsay, but I showed my fans how to be Duncan and get the ladies. Not like I am over with Courtney... well, maybe". In the control panel, Chris said: "Shocking!" Back in the studio, Chris said: "Okay guys, so first is... Gwen and Heather! We are going to watch you box in the boxing ring!"

"I like boxing! I boxed gifts last winter for Santa!" said Lindsay. "The sport boxing" said Chris. "Oohhhh!" said Lindsay. In the confessional, Chris said: "I picked these two against each other because they always fight. This is for the win!" Heather and Gwen walked in the boxing ring as the teams sat down in seperate bleachers. "When you beat the person down three times and they don't come up within ten seconds, you win the first challenge for your team!" said Chris.

Heather grinned. "Now, are we going to use our hands or do we get something?" said Heather. "You get giant marshmallows!" said Chris. In the confessional, Chris said: "Farted on by Owen last season!" Chris snickered. "What's a big deal about a marshmallow?" said Heather. "Oh... no-thing" Chris laughed. Heather and Gwen put the marshmallows on and Chris said, "One... two... three... GO!" Heather kicked Gwen in the face. Gwen's lip begun to bleed.

"And the moody girl goes wild! Woo, woo, WOO!" said Izzy. "What?!" said Heather, exchanging Izzy an angry face. In the confessional, Heather said: "If we lose this movie challenge, Izzy is going home. I still have my alliance and even though it looks like Lindsay is not in it anymore, she still is my friend and wouldn't want me to get eliminated and Duncan would just care less".

Gwen wiped the blood off with her hands and went to the ground near Heather's shoes. "What are you doing?!" said Heather. Gwen put the blood on Heather's shoes. She then got up and ran a few steps away from Heather. Heather then said, "Gross! You are so going to pay!" In the confessional, Gwen said: "I sometimes play bloody". Heather went to the ground and tried to clean off her shoes.

Gwen ran toward Heather and she fell flat on the ground. "One... two..." said Chris, slowly. "Can you hurry it up?" said Gwen, as Heather tried to get up. "Three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten!" said Chris. Heather got up after ten and fell down again. "I think someone had a chicken flu" said Gwen. Heather growled and got up. "Much better" said Chris.

"Second round! GO!" said Chris. Heather pushed Gwen down and put her foot on her. "One, two, three, four..." said Chris. Gwen tried to remove the shoe, as blood slowly got on her. "Gah! Oh my boxers! That's gross!" said Chris. "Speed up the counting or else I can get Chef to do it!" said Heather. "Where is Chef?" said Izzy. Chef ran to the boxing ring in studio fifteen with a bra on and a dress.

"Don't ask" said Chef, rolling his eyes and sitting with the Gophers. "Five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten!" said Chris. "Take that weird goth girl" said Heather. "Round three, it's tied one per person and don't look at Chef" said Chris. Gwen looked at Chef. She then barfed on Heather. In the confessional, Duncan laughed. Chris tried to hold himself back from barfing.

Heather fell to the ground, as Gwen barfed some more. "Gwen wins round..." said Chris, barfing behind him. "What?" said Chef, looking at everyone. Lindsay looked at Chef. "This is even worse than when Old Bub Nelson lived under the bridge!" said Lindsay. "Okay..." said Chris. "One more round and I win!" said Gwen. "You are hopeless!" said Heather. "And... go!" said Chris. In the confessional, Chris said: "This is for the win!"

Gwen said, "Just lose, you have no chance!" "Never" said Heather. "Heather, you forgot to think inside the box!" said Lindsay. "WHAT?!" said Heather. Gwen kicked Heather hard and Heather fell down. "One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten and the winner is GWEN!" said Chris. "YES!" said Gwen. "Sorry Hannah!" said Lindsay. Chef walked over to Heather and did some CPR.

Heather woke up and barfed on Chef. "I'll get a mop" said Chef. "I need a shower" said Heather, walking off. "All sports players watch until the team wins; they may be needed" said Chris. "Guess what, I am not a sports player, I hate sports and I hate you!" said Heather, walking off. "I wuv woo too!" said Chris. "SHUT UP!" yelled Heather. "Follow me all!" said Chris, walking to a section with pom-poms.

In the confessional, Chris laughed. Chris laughed. "What is with you and laughing?!" said Courtney. "Lindsay and Tyler are going to cheer together!" said Chris. "That's not as sport!" complained Courtney. "But you do that at sports and I want a cheer!" said Chris. In the confessional, Courtney said: "And I wish I had my PDA still!" "Think of a cheer; best cheer wins!" said Chris.

A few minutes later, Lindsay and Tyler had their cheers in their mind already. In the confessional, Tyler said: "I think I should throw this challenge, Lindsay should win and I hate cheering!" "Okay, Tyler is first!" said Chris. "Okay!" said Tyler. In the confessional, Courtney said: "We better win this challenge".

"I like sports, sports sports sports. Sp-" cheered Tyler. "I hate it already. Next!" said Chris. In the confessional, Tyler said: "I think I did well, let's just hope I don't get eliminated this week". "Let's go Lindsay!" said Izzy. "Okay!" said Lindsay. In the confessional, Lindsay said: "I think I can win with this cheer!"

"Chip is awesome! He is cool! Best host ever, woot, woot, woot! Chip is better than Cheffiepoo and better than some of you and some of the people are so fair, but he is not that scared of bugs and rats and stuff and I was a dog and I ate dinner and this cheer is fun and then I went to the mall and went shopping and singing and all of all and he is cool!" said Lindsay. Chris clapped. "Best cheer ever!" he said.

"So, Lindsay wins the challenge!" said Chris. In the confessional, Courtney said: "If we lose, Tyler is so going home!" "Our next challenge involves Cody and Izzy!" said Chris. In the confessional, Cody said: "Me and Izzy, awesome. Maybe she can have a crush on me. Come on mad skills! Come to me!" "Follow me!" said Chris, leading everybody to a badmintion court.

Heather returned from her shower. "Did we win anything?!" said Heather. "I won the cheering contest!" said Lindsay. In the confessional, Heather said: "Chris picks me for boxing and Lindsay gets to sing and dance? That is just cheap right there!" "Anybody want to guess what we are doing?" said Chris. A cricket chirped. "Badmintion!" said Chris.

In the confessional, Chris said: "It's not badmintion or goodmintion, it's greatmintion". "Cody and Izzy are going to play badmintion against each other. First person to score three points wins!" said Chris. "Okay" said Izzy. Chris tossed the rackets and ball out. Izzy scored the first point. "Izzy has one point!" said Chris.

The Gaffers cheered. However, Cody scored the next point. "It's tied one per person!" said Chris. The Grips cheered. Izzy went nuts and scored the next two points. "IZZY WINS THE CHALLENGE!" said Chris. The Gaffers cheered and Izzy said, speedtalking: "That movie was so awesome that I learned so much about the game! And I know how to be wild. Haha. Look out Cody, here comes Izzy!"

Cody gulped. Lindsay and Heather, both had confused faces and stared at Izzy. "Woo, woo, WOO! Woo!" said Izzy. In the confessional, Cody said: "Why was I thinking that Izzy wouldn't be wild and wouldn't be nuts enough to date her. She's nice, but she's not... my fit". "Okay, so now is the final two in the challenge. Duncan and Courtney have to do... basketball!" said Chris.

In the confessional, Chris said: "I put them together on purpose, because they like each other and not like. When I say like, I mean like like. Mhm". In the confessional, Courtney said: "I barely know the rules, can't I do cheering or something?" In the confessional, Duncan said: "Easy win!" "Anyways, if the Gaffers win, they get immunity, but if the Grips win, we need to do a tiebreaker!" said Chris.

"Ladies first" said Duncan. Chris passed the ball to Courtney. "First person to get three points wins and... GO!" said Chris, blowing his whistle. Courtney dribbled the ball and Duncan snatched it from her. Duncan dribbled it to the other side of the court and shot it. It was in the hoop. "One point for Duncan!" said Chris. Courtney then said: "I thought you liked me".

"I need to win this challenge" said Duncan. "But without me, you wouldn't be back in the game" said Courtney. "Can we worry about that later? You'll probably win the next challenge or whatever" said Duncan. In the confessional, Courtney said: "That little... cow!" Courtney's face turned into anger. She snatched the ball from Duncan and shot it. The ball was in! "A point for Courtney!" said Chris.

"Come on tough guy, show me the best you can do!" said Courtney. "Fine!" said Duncan, shooting a ball from the three-pointer line. Courtney growled. In the confessional, Duncan said: "She did it to herself. Now, here comes the hulk!" "One more point and the Gaffers win immunity!" Courtney dribbled the ball toward the hoop and Duncan fouled her. "Foul! Foul! I call foul!" said Courtney.

"Not really, I mean. We aren't playing three pointers, fouls or anything like that..." said Chris. "WHAT?!" said Courtney. Duncan shot the ball in the hoop. "And that's how the GAFFERS WIN IMMUNITY!" said Chris. Courtney growled and mumbled: "Unfair" over and over again. "She has issues" said Chris. Duncan nodded. "So, cast your votes in later in the Gilded Chris ceremony" said Chris. The Grips walked away.

At the Gilded Chris ceremony, Chris said: "Tonight is a big night, none of you did something to save the team, except Gwen". Chris gave Gwen a Gilded Chris. "The night Gilded Chris goes to.... CODY!" said Chris. In the confessional, Cody said: "While the challenge, Courtney was mad, right? I found that kinda cute, too bad I forgot my camera at home".

"This is the final Gilded Chris and it goes to..." said Chris.

"Courtney, somehow!" said Chris. "What?!" said Tyler. "Tyler, you have been eliminated" smiled Courtney. In the confessional, Courtney said: "At least something is going right for me". Tyler walked on the carpet of shame and said: "I'll miss you Lindsay! Good luck!" He went in the lame-o-sine, which drived away. "What an elimination?!" said Chris, smiling. "Oh please" said Courtney, walking away.

In the confessional, Lindsay said: "Good bye Tyson!" Ending the episode, Chris said: "What will happen to Lindsay? What do I have in store for next week? Who likes cheese? Find out next week in Total Drama Action!"

Chapter 16: Dial M For Merger

"Last time on Total Drama Action" said Chris. "We had a fun sports movie and what did you think of Tyler throwing the challenge or Duncan getting over Courtney? Don't you just love the drama? In the end, Tyler got eliminated and got the heck outta here!"

The background got black and Chris' suit suddenly turned into a spy suit. "And I did see Chef stalking Lady Gaga yesterday night. Join us today for more Total Drama Action!" said Chris, throwing a tomato at the viewers.

(theme song plays)

Everyone walked back to the trailers. "No Chris and no Chef!" said Cody. "This is probably the 150th horror movie this year" said Heather, rolling her eyes. "Why so sure?" said Duncan. "I am the smartest one here!" said Heather. "WHAT?!" said Courtney.

"Take a chill pill Courtney, you ran into a crane a few weeks ago just for a PDA" said Heather. Lindsay nodded. "Without that, I won't get whatever I want!" said Courtney. "Want this?!" said Chris, off-screen throwing a hat at Courtney. Courtney fell in a trap.

"How the heck did that get there?" said Duncan. A dart hit the back of his neck and Duncan fell in the hole too. "This is getting freaky" said Cody. In the confessional, Cody said: "At least I am the only guy here!" "Ladies, ladies, ladies! I can save you!" said Cody.

In the confessional, Heather said: "How convincing? He sounds like Justin". Lindsay tried to go in the trailer and someone said: "Intruder alert!" Lindsay fell down the trailer's stairs into the hole.

"I think we should RUN!" yelled Cody. "Haha!" said Izzy, jumping into the hole. "Weirdo" said Heather to herself. Heather looked at Gwen and Cody. "I am stuck with you two?" she said. "This has to do" said Gwen. "RUN!" yelled Cody. Heather and Gwen ran to the trailer.

Gwen shut the door, before Cody can get in. "Hello?!" said Cody. In the confessional, Cody said: "The ladies have been ig-". Someone hit Cody with a pan and Cody fell to the ground. Heather and Gwen begun to fight, as someone threw a smoke ball into the trailer.

In the hole, a hologram went off and Chris said in a bad Russian accent: "Velcome to the Cloak and Dagger. Home of Spy movies, mon and womon!" "That is a bad French accent" said Heather.

"You mean, Jamaican!" said Duncan. "No, Japanese!" said Courtney. "Dedrek!" said Lindsay. "What?!" said Heather. "Dedrek..." said Lindsay. Everyone looked confused. "I read a story in Spring and he sounded like that!" said Lindsay.

"This is a Russian accent. I can't believe you didn't know" said Chris. "It was awful, go back to Russian language class and actually say it in a clearer and much better way" said Heather. "Whatever, so today's challenge is a spy movie and there will be three challenges" said Chris.

"The first challenge is to find a bag through the lazers. If you get the bag, it will give you an advantage in the last challenge". "I'll explain more once you finish the first challenge. Good luck kiddies" said Chris.

"Oh yeah! Just to mix up some stuff, the teams are merged. Bye!" said Chris, as the hologram dissapeared. "Teams are merged, after everything we have been through?!" said Courtney. The 6teen theme song was shown in a format like the actual Dial M For Merger, but it was a full version.

The castmates arrived in the second floor of the studio. "How can we get through this?" said Cody. Izzy jumped over the lazers and ran toward the bag. Duncan went under each lazer, but hit one and fell into a trap. Duncan got tied up into a giant rope.

Courtney, dodging lazers and sneaking under lazers soon went by Duncan. "Can you get me out of this mess?" said Duncan. "Remember last challenge?" said Courtney, walking past Duncan. "Can you just get me out of this giant mess?!" said Duncan.

"After all the work I did for you to get back in the game and last challenge you wouldn't dare to let me win and now it's every man for themselves. Sorry Dunky" said Courtney, running toward the wire. Izzy jumped on Courtney and both of them begun to beat up each other.

Izzy bit the bag and kicked Courtney away. Izzy opened the bag and found a wire. "Ooooh!" said Lindsay, as the lazers went away. Lindsay ran to Izzy. "Can I keep them, because I can make some TVs and some computers and--" said Lindsay.

"This is a wire and no you can not have it. It's mine!" said Izzy. In the confessional, Heather said: "Right now, the only chance I have to win this game is to get more people in my alliance. Cody is annoying, Gwen is just gross, Duncan is useless, Courtney is just annoying and that leaves Izzy".

Heather ran to Izzy. "Can we talk to each other for a minute?" said Heather, when Cody tried to sneak up. Cody stayed still. "Want to be in my alliance?!" whispered Heather. In the confessional, Izzy said: "In one chance, I can be alone and be awesome, in another chance, I am bossed around".

"Fine" whispered Izzy. "Good, now, as alliance leader. I order you to give me that wire" whispered Heather. Izzy kicked Heather in the stomach. Heather barfed on the floor. "Gross" said Duncan. Gwen laughed. "It's not the first time you saw someone barf, you barfed yourself" said Heather to Gwen.

In the confessional, Heather said: "Crazy girl is going down". In the confessional, Izzy said: "Some people just can't have enough. More bacon please". The hologram showed up again: "Now, in the next thirty seconds, you need to escpae out of this building or else... die" said Chris.

"Why?" said Courtney. "Because this bomb will explode in thirty seconds!" said Chris. "Twenty nine, twenty eight, twenty seven" said Chris. "We need to get outta here!" said Courtney. "ME FIRST!" yelled Izzy, jumping off the building. "Ummm... weirdo" said Heather.

"Twenty one, twenty, nineteen" said Chris. "We need to find a big wire" said Courtney. Courtney looked around for a wire. "This will do!" said Courtney, taking off Cody's belt. In the confessional, Cody said: "I felt like I exploded. You never see that everyday!"

"Thirteen, twelve, eleven" said Chris. Courtney attached it to a wire outside of the studio. "Why can't we just get out?" said Cody. "Cody, why couldn't you have thought of that thirty seconds ago" said Courtney, facepalming herself.

"Six, five" said Chris. Courtney hid under Duncan. In the confessional, Duncan said: "She so loves me". In the confessional, Courtney said: "Without me, Duncan would have probably wet his pants". "Two, one!" said Chris. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" yelled Courtney.

Chris looked at his watch. "I guess my timing was off" said Chris. "We didn't explode?!" said Heather. "YAY!" said Lindsay. "That was a false one. Now comes the real countdown!" said Chris. In a more dramatic style, Chris said: "Thirty, twenty-nine, twenty-eight".

"RUN!" said Courtney. Everyone ran down the stairs and Lindsay looked out the window and waved at Izzy. "There was no explosion?!" said Izzy. "No" said Lindsay, sadly. "Can I borrow your highlights once you die?" said Izzy. "Hurry up!" said Heather, dragging Lindsay down the stairs.

"Six, five, four, three" said Chris. "We are just in the cafe in the middle of both floors!" complained Gwen. "ONE!" said Chris. Everyone was freaked out. "Haha! SUCKERS!" said Chris. "But your actual countdown is now" said Chris, in a more serious voice. "Thirty, nineteen, eighteen" he said.

"How do we know if he is actually lying this time" said Courtney. Izzy came in the studio and said: "There is a bomb attached the building. Get the heck out!" she said. "I like bombs. Me, Manny and Claiear were once--" said Lindsay. "STUF LINDSAY!" yelled Heather. "Stuff?" said Lindsay.

In the confessional, Heather said: "She's a total idiot!" "Sixteen, fifteen, ten, nine..." said Chris. "You skipped like three numbers!" said Courtney. "You do the math outta here!" said Duncan to Courtney. "You probably flunked twice you... juvy freak!" said Courtney. "Juvy freak?" said Duncan.

In the confessional, Cody said: "I love watching those two fights. It shows me how much Courtney needs me". "Four, three" said Chris, as everyone left the studio. "We are out! YES!" said Cody. Lindsay dropped her lipstick, as she got out however.

"MY LIPSTICK!" said Lindsay, gasping and running back in the studio. "LINDSAY!" yelled Cody, chasing after Lindsay. The bomb went off. "Rest in peace my fellow friends" said Gwen. Lindsay and Cody got out of the building alive. Cody, however had lipstick on.

"Sorry" said Lindsay. "It's okay" said Cody, sighing. Duncan cracked up. "That was fun! I wish I jumped off the stairs!" said Izzy. The hologram appeared again. "You all need to do this final challenge not anywhere near here" said Chris.

"Walk straight and then to your left after about two hundred steps. You'll find me and my c-" said Chris, as the cat attacked him. Everyone walked to the location. "You have two minutes to set off these bombs, before a surprise happens!" said Chris.

Chris walked away. "And where are you going?" said Courtney. "Somewhere" said Chris. The bombs begun to tick. Courtney kicked it over and over again. Soon, all the bombs had one minute and five seconds left. "COURTNEY!" they all yelled.

"What?! I thought kicking would've helped!" said Courtney. Izzy cut the wire. Her bomb stopped ticking. "Oooh!" said Lindsay. "Maybe if we all do that, the bombs will stop!" said Courtney. "Pass it over!" said Heather. "No" said Izzy, passing it to Lindsay.

"Lindsay, pass it to me!" said Heather. "But, it's Izzy's!" said Lindsay, cutting the wire. "Just give it to the rest of us fast!" said Courtney. Lindsay passed it to Izzy, who put it in her pocket. Heather used her mirror and the wire broke also.

Duncan snapped it and Courtney pulled it. Cody bit it and Gwen soon broke it, with ten seconds left. "If we uncut every wire, why do I still hear clicking?" said Gwen. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!" yelled Courtney, as the bomb went off.

Stink went everywhere. "Worst challenge ever" said Heather. "This was even worse than skunks!" said Lindsay. In his beach chair, Chris smelled the explosion and said: "Using the same operations would've been easy. More fun for me!"

In a tomato juice pool, everyone was in and trying to get the stink off. Chef passed straws and said: "That's dinner!" In the confessional, Chef said: "That's what we were using like eight episodes ago with the disaster challenge".

"Cody and Izzy though get a reward!" said Chris. "No elimination?" said Cody. "Nope!" said Chris. In the confessional, Cody said: "I am giving this reward to one of the ladies". "I am giving this reward to Lindsay" said Cody. "You sure dude? You can't change your mind" said Chris.

"I am positive" said Cody. "It's some place you'll like" said Chris. Cody sighed. In the confessional, Chris said: "Not!" "Okay, so Lindsay and Izzy are going to..." said Chris. "My uncle's house?" said Izzy. "The mall?" said Lindsay. Izzy stared at Lindsay.

"What? It's the place where magical things happen!" said Lindsay. "The local cheese factory!" said Chris. Lindsay clapped. "There, you will eat blue cheese, green cheese and red cheese. Don't forget yellow cheese and you will meet the one and only... ANNOYING CHEESE!" said Chris.

Lindsay and Izzy took off to the cheese factory. "Yay! We get to cut the cheese together!" said Lindsay, as they took off. "Join us next time to see the cheese in the cheese factory and what will happen with a bunch of relationships and more on Total Drama Action!" said Chris.

Chapter 17: Super Hero-Id

“Last time on Total Drama Action, we had an epic spy movie, well not really. Anyways, in the end Lindsay and Izzy went to the cheese factory and let’s see the castmates’ reactions in Total Drama Action” said Chris.

(theme song plays)

Lindsay and Izzy got out of the lame-o-sine and ran into the trailer with bags of cheese. Lindsay put her cheese on the table, as Courtney woke up, because of the cheese. “What is that terrible smell?” said Courtney. “Oh, that’s me. Sorry” said Cody, waking up. “Ewww” said Courtney. “No, that’s me. With the cheese” said Izzy.

“Ewwww!” said Courtney, watching Izzy eat blue and green cheese. “There was a lot of cheese!” said Lindsay, smiling. Lindsay took off her cheese cap. “Want some?” said Izzy. “NO!” said Courtney. Everyone woke up. “What’s her problem?” said Duncan to Gwen. Courtney growled. In the confessional, Courtney said: “It’s like everyone wants to be my enemy. And isn’t Duncan my boyfriend? He is probably telling Gwen his secrets and more”.

Lindsay looked in her suitcase and found no underwear. “I am wearing none either!” said Lindsay. “Ewww” said Courtney, walking away. “That’s cool! So am I!” said Izzy. “Ewww” said Courtney. In the confessional, Cody said: “I never knew that a bunch of girls don’t wear underwear and I always sleep near them…”

“I think I know who took them!” said Izzy. “Who?” said Lindsay. “That girl Sierra” said Izzy. “Sarah?” said Lindsay. “That purple girl” said Izzy. “Purple?” said Gwen and Heather at the same time. “Your skin is--“ said Gwen and Heather at the same time to each other. “Purple hair I mean” said Izzy.

“Oh yeah!” said Lindsay. “Stalker-licious” said Heather. “Yummy!” said Lindsay. “And I thought Courtney was weird” said Izzy, laughing nuts. Courtney stared at Izzy, before saying “Why would she stalk a girl, when she is a girl?”. “It’s like that girl who robbed the Twilight Bank and she was a fan of them and she wanted to buy more Twilight stuff and I threw her to the moon with her friend. I hope they are happy there!” said Izzy.

In the confessional, Heather said: “I believe they are talking about that girl who hacked onto my Loser Gwen blog before the new season. She is such a stalker. Even worse than that girl with the blue skin. You know who I am talking about”.

“Have some. Ignore the camel smell!” said Izzy, bringing the blue cheese closer to Courtney. “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” yelled Courtney, running out of the trailer. “Ooh! A war!” said Izzy. In the confessional, Izzy said: “I have been working for this for a while, watching Capital One Bank commercials!”

Izzy grabbed a giant log and charged to Courtney. Chris swooped in with a Batman costume, suddenly. “Nice entrance” said Cody. “Thanks” said Chris. “It’s not Halloweenie!” said Lindsay. “Halloween” said Heather, rolling her eyes. “No need to be rude” said Lindsay. “Girls, girls, no need to fight” said Chris.

“Since when did Batman try to hit on girls?” said Duncan to Chris. Chris ignored Duncan. “Are you Buttman?” said Lindsay. “BATMAN!” said everybody, but Lindsay. “Sorryy….” said Lindsay. In the confessional, Lindsay said: “Sheesh, tough crowd”.

“AHHHHHHHHHHH!” yelled Courtney, running in the cave, as Izzy chased her. A bear begun to follow Izzy.

“Today’s challenge is a superhero challenge and you are going to studio seventeen to begin to make your superhero costumes. More on this after fifty minutes once you are done. Anyways, walk to it!” said Chris, flying off. “Woah, how could he do that?” said Gwen. Chris crashed into a mailbox.

“OW!” said Chris. People ran over to him with makeup. “Err…” said Cody. “He deserved it. What kind of a lame-o host is he?” said Heather. Lindsay walked into studio one and Heather said, “Wrong way idiot. Learn your counting!”

In the confessional, Lindsay said: “I am getting more angry with Heather each day. She called me Cheddar Face on a text message and ate all of my pink lemonade when I was gone!”

“Heather, you are a” said Lindsay, before a bleep. Heather stared at Lindsay in shock. Everyone laughed. “OWNED!” said Cody. In the confessional, Cody said: “And that’s for that little blue dude that goes into chatrooms! And not that guy from Avatar”.

“Well, at least… at least I am not a guy!” said Heather. In the confessional, Heather said: “I could’ve played it better, but I didn’t want to waste my time talking to a little… dumb idiot like Lindsay”. “You should be talking. You probably have a stalker that stalks you and on facebook, keeps asking you to come out of the house with your blue undies, because you have blue skin and you need blue undies to match the blue skin so nobody can know you have blue skin” said Lindsay.

“Say what?” said Heather. “You lost me at blue skin” said Cody. Gwen nodded. “I win the own contest!” said Heather. “Own contest?” said Gwen. “You got served” said Duncan, laughing. Everyone but Heather laughed. “ARGH! Just die in a monster” said Heather, walking to studio seventeen. Everyone arrived to studio seventeen and Chris said, “Welcome everyone. You heard me back in the trailer, so begin the challenge”.

An intern walked over to Chris and whispered something to him. “Oh yeaaah… Beyonce has a crush on…” said Chris, before Cody said in the confessional: “Me”. Since Cody said that, we did not know what Chris said. “And wants to give s a free CD of…” said Chris, looking at the CD. “Telephone Remix” said Chris, smiling. In the confessional, Heather said: “That song is the”. In the confessional, Gwen said: “Worst”. In the confessional, Duncan said: “Stupidest”. In the confessional, Cody said: “AWESOME SONG EVER!”

“And GO!” said Chris. Everyone made costumes and Cody begun to sing, as Chris put on the music. “I guess Beyonce has a fan!” said Chris. Cody nodded as he sung. In the confessional, Chris said: “I wonder if he’ll actually do the work or not”. Izzy and Courtney got chased around by a bear back into studio seventeen. The bear ran away after he saw Chef. In the confessional, Heather laughed and said, “Are they related?”

Chris explained to Izzy and Courtney, “Today’s challenge is a superhero challenge and since you didn’t listen to me and ran off being nuts and--“. Izzy stuffed the blue cheese in Courtney’s mouth. Courtney barfed it out on Chris’ shoes. “NOT. MY. SHOES.” said Chris, angrily. In the confessional, Courtney said: “Izzy is so going to pay!”

“Anyways, do what they have to do!” said Chris, signaling for a napkin. In the confessional, Courtney said: “Now I don’t know what we have to do. Duncan will ignore me, Heather is a (bleep) who will do nothing and Gwen is a goner who will also ignore me and she is after Duncan. I can tell it”.

“Hey Lindsay” said Courtney. “Hey Cornhead!” said Lindsay. “I am not a cornhead” said Courtney, trying to keep her yelling in. “Combhead?” said Lindsay. “What’s the challenge?” said Courtney. “Make superhero costumes!” said Courtney. Izzy listened to this fifteen feet away and ran to her section and begun to make a costume.

After fifty minutes, Chris said: “Time is up!” and threw smokebombs at the tables. “None shall take of it!” said Chris, smiling. Lindsay touched an item. “None shall take of it!” said Chris. Lindsay continued to touch the item. “None shall take of it!” said Chris. Lindsay touched the item again. “None shall take of it!” said Chris. “What part of none shall take of it don’t you understand?” said Chris. “The shall” said Lindsay.

“Now, immunity will be decided right here. Whoever gets the highest score, based on superpower, costume and name will get immunity!” said Chris. “Ooh! Me! I want to go first!” said Lindsay. “Did I hear Heather?” said Chris. “NO! It’s your BFFF! Lindsay!” said Lindsay. “Fine” said Chris, rolling his eyes.

Lindsay walked on the catwalk. “I have this costume on and it has a bunny on the top of my head, because…” said Lindsay. “You like bunnies?” said Chris, rolling his eyes. In the confessional, Heather said: “She is so stupid”. “No, I was thinking of them when I made my bandana thingie, but good guess. I like bunnies too!” said Lindsay. Chris sighed. “Anything else?” said Chris. Lindsay nodded. “I am wearing red, white and green, because those are the colors of the American flag!” said Lindsay.

“Isn’t it red, white and blue?” said Duncan. “Oh yeah” said Lindsay. “Chris, if it is not obvious, Lindsay knows nothing and should get no work for her very little effort toward this dumb challenge” said Heather. “We’ll give our results after she’s done” said Chris. “Name?” said Chris to Lindsay.

“Umm… I am wondering…” said Lindsay. “Wonder Woman” said Chris. Lindsay nodded. “I am a fan of Wonder Woman” said Chris. Lindsay smiled. “What are your super powers?” said Chris. “Ummm… I am wondering…” said Lindsay. “Okay, wondering” said Chris. “I rate it… 24 out of 30!” Chris continued. “What?! The design sucked, the name sucked, the everything sucked!” said Heather.

“Let’s see what you got to beat her!” said Chris, smiling. In the confessional, Heather grabbed Courtney’s PDA from her pocket. “If you did not know, I stole her PDA before she left the trailer a few days ago. It’s all worth doing, because with the latest sound effects, I can fire her lawyers and get my own! I am so crafty that I will win this season!” said Heather. Heather then ripped up the Courtney name on the PDA and said, “It’s mine!”

Back in studio seventeen, Chris said: “Heather, you are up!” “You better rate my high” said Heather. “I probably won’t” said Chris. Heather pulled out the PDA. “Hey! Give me that!” said Courtney. “No touching my PDA!” said Heather, smiling. Heather walked up to the stage and said, “I am the Sexy Devil”. Cody whistled.

“See what I mean?” said Heather. “He might be whistling each time he breaths, just like how Owen whistles the National Anthem!” said Izzy. “No, she IS sexy” said Cody, whistling again. “I thought so psycho” said Heather. “Uhmmm… okaaaaay…” said Chris. “What’s your costume” said Chris. “No need for costumes. My sexiness is my costume!” said Heather, winking. “Err…” said Chris.

“And I believe your superpower is being sexy and letting guys do your homework” said Chris. “Cha ching” said Heather. “Meh… twenty one out of thirty points” said Chris. Heather reached her PDA. Chris had a … look on his face. In the confessional, Lindsay said: “I got less than Hannah! How did that happen?” In the confessional, Heather deleted Courtney’s contacts and added her own. “I love messing up her stuff. I even messed up her hair in the first episode when she didn’t notice me in the bouncehouse. Anyways, the reason I came in here was why the heck did Lindsay get more points than me. I am an idol to Cody, that is worth something, isn’t it?”

Heather shook her butt, which said “POW!” while walking off the stage. Chris laughed. “Cody, you are up!” said Chris. Cody walked up to the stage. Chris laughed. “Costume?” said Chris. “I have a telephone part on my head because I--“ said Cody. The telephone rung and Cody begun to sing something.

“Err… is that it for costumes?” said Chris. Cody, ignored Chris and continued to sing. “Please hang up!” said Chris. The song stopped two minutes later and Cody hung up. “And why did you sing?” said Chris. In the confessional, Chris said: “It’s not even season three yet, when we sing!” “What’s your name?” said Chris. “Telecody!” said Cody. “Nice name” said Chris. “Now, what’s you--“ said Cody, before the telephone begun to ring again.

Cody begun to sing the song again for the next three and a half minutes. Chris grew inpatient and bored. “What song is that?” said Chris. “The Telephone remix!” said Cody. “Eleven out of thirty” said Chris. “That’s not bad!” said Cody. “Let me shave off an extra six for boring me” said Chris. “Six out of thirty?” said Cody. Courtney, Gwen and Heather begun to laugh. “What? I don’t get it” said Lindsay, staring at them confused. In the confessional, Lindsay said: “Are they laughing at Tyler?!”

“Izzy, you are up!” said Chris. Izzy ran up to the stage and begun to speedtalk, “I am Iron Woman and I have iron all over me. I didn’t iron my costume though, so that’s bad. I am so sorry about that. My supermove is saving people because I am Iron Woman and Iron Woman is awesome and Owen eats iron so he may eat me, well; maybe even eat me up, because you know. Me and him have something going, but will he like the iron or me? Oh no. I think I should change this costume fast, before he likes the iron instead of me. Can I change? Can I? Can I? Holy crap, I sound like Katie and Sadie. Too puppish and crazy. Well, I am crazy. Haha. A lot of people tell me that and my uncle even agrees. That uncle that cut off his ear by accident in a barbeque. He is also crazy. So, let’s say me and my family are crazy. I ate chicken that day. Do you like chicken? Chris, what’s my score?” said Izzy.

“I did not get most of it, but I will give you a fifteen out of thirteen for effort!” said Chris. “YAY!” said Izzy, jumping off the stage. In the confessional, Cody said: “I had effort too and I got a six. Oh pooy”.

“Courtney is up!” said Chris. In the confessional, Courtney said: “If only I had my PDA to allow me to get scored higher. Grrr…” Courtney walked up to the stage and said, “I am Courtney. My superpower is being awesome and this is just my regular clothes with an awesome hat!” “Very original and not creative at all. Ten points out of thirty!” said Chris. “May I use your PDA, Heather?” said Courtney. “No!” said Heather. “What if I win and I’ll split the money fifty-fifty” said Courtney.

“Sure!” smiled Heather. “Now, give me!” said Courtney. “I am not finished. Sure… in a million years” said Heather. “Airhead” said Courtney. “It’s guaranteed that I will win. Who does not know that I will win!” said Heather. “All of us know that you won’t win!” said Duncan. “As if, I play the game the best out of all of you!” said Heather. Gwen laughed.

“For a blue airhead, you are owning yourself. You use everyone you know. We all know this, because the way Lindsay used to do stuff with you and be your friend and now she hates you” said Gwen. “It’s true” said Lindsay, sighing. “Go die because of my hotness” said Heather. “Hot? You are probably burning up, because of your ugly blue skin” said Gwen. “Ugly? Blue? Skin? You are joking, aren’t you?” said Heather.

An intern walked over to Chris and whispered something to him. “This is overtime?” said Chris. The intern nodded and walked away. “Let’s speed things up. We have part two of the challenge and oh crap… this show is so dead…” said Chris. “We killed the show?” said Lindsay. Chris nodded slowly. “Duncan, real quick! Supermove?” said Chris, rushing. “Beating nerds up” said Duncan, beating a Harold dumbie up.

“Wait, he didn’t say hi to me!” said Lindsay. “It’s a dumbie” said Duncan. “Dumbie” said Heather, quietly. “Supername?” said Chris, continuing to rush. “The Hulk That B-“ said Duncan. “Ummm… twelve out of thirty” said Chris, not letting Duncan finish his sentence. “That’ll do” said Duncan. “He didn’t even say his costume!” said Lindsay.

“YOU THINK I HAVE TIME FOR THIS?!” said Chris, yelling at Lindsay. Lindsay nodded yes. Chris sighed. “Okay, fine. We can take some more time” said Chris, growling. “Lindsay is in line to get immunity, because Duncan can’t catch up to Lindsay, even with a ten” said Chris. “Yay!” said Lindsay, clapping.

In the confessional, Heather said: “How did Lindsay beat all of us?” In the confessional, Courtney said: “One word: Unreal”.

“Gwen, you are up. What’s your costume?” said Chris. “I am the Environment Saver!” said Gwen. “Mhm, what do you do?” said Chris. “Clean the world” said Gwen. “How do you do that?” said Chris. “It’s easy and you need to go to for details” said Gwen. “You rely on computers?” said Chris. “Yes” said Gwen. “That’s not going green!” said Chris.

“GWEN’S A FAKE!” laughed Heather. “How is Gwen fake when she’s alive and it looks like her?” said Lindsay, looking at Gwen. Lindsay walked up to Gwen and smelled her. “Gross” said Courtney. “It smells like her” said Lindsay. “Er… thanks Lindsay” said Gwen.

In the confessional, Chris said: “Does she need to use her senses for everything? We are already overtime and I am going to go nuts if Chef doesn’t come in with the unbroken pan I ordered from that man who knows how to break pans!”

“You are a fake already and you get only ten points out of thirty. LINDSAY WINS IMMUNITY!” said Chris. “You mean Hannah, right?” said Lindsay. “You want to give your immunity to Hannah?” said Chris. “Well, she won the challenge, so yes” said Lindsay. In the confessional, Heather said: “And that’s how she is so smart! I am safe for another week. I hope you like it!” “So, Heather has immunity and not Lindsay. I’ll see you all at the Gilded Chris ceremony!” said Chris.

In the confessional, Gwen said: “Now the person I was going to vote off is safe. What now?! WHAT NOW?!”

At the Gilded Chris ceremony, Chris said: “Heather is safe, since Lindsay gave her immunity”. Heather got her Gilded Chris and sat back down and had an evil grin. “The next Gilded Chris’ are for Gwen, Cody and Duncan” said Chris. Gwen, Duncan and Cody all received their Chris’ and sat back down.

“Courtney, Lindsay, Izzy, one of you will go home and that person is not Courtney and not Lindsay!” said Chris, handing Lindsay and Courtney Chris’. Izzy had blue cheese, as Chris said: “Now, Izzy. Time to head outta here!” Izzy somehow flew off to the Aftermath studio, over the lame-o-sine.

“Well, that ended so long that we need to shorten the Aftermath. Join us next time for some more Total Drama Action… and Beth… the cow!” said Chris.

Chapter 18: The Aftermath: 3

The Total Drama Action Aftermath intro played. “Over the time when we left off in Total Drama Action, many things have changes, including the eliminations of Webby, Tyler, Trent and Izzy, who should be dropping in shortly!” said Beth. Izzy fell from the top of the studio and landed perfectly safe. She ran into the backroom. “See what I mean?” said Beth.

In the backroom, Webby said: “I hate speaking to crowds”. “I love speaking to crowds. Even swearing to crowds” said Izzy. “Err… okaaay” said Trent, walking away.

Back in the studio, Beth said: “About time I host. Anyways, Duncan also returned to the show and let’s introduce the cast!” “We have Harold!” said Beth. Harold said, “About time I was first!” “And we also have Sadie and Katie!” said Beth. “EEEEEEEEEEEE!” they squealed, after looking at Justin. “We also have Justin, Ezekiel and…” said Beth. “I am in this to win this. I am returning in episode nineteen. I just know it. Even my bull told me” said Ezekiel.

“Are you talking about my butt?” said LeShawna. “Maybe” said Ezekiel. LeShawna slapped Ezekiel in the face. Ezekiel slapped LeShawna in the face. “Oh no you didn’t!” said LeShawna. “Oh yes he did” said Noah. “Shut up you scrawny skinny kid” said LeShawna.

“And the others!” said Beth. “Okay, moving on…” said Beth. “Did you hear about that soda machine?” said Sadie. “Oh my gosh! I love soda!” said Katie. “I do too!” said Sadie. “Where is it?” said Katie. “Each time you say a swear word, you get a good chance to get it!” said Sadie. “I don’t swear!” said Katie. “I don’t either!” said Sadie. “I know what!” said Katie.

Someone swore in the crowd. “Please leave if you said that” said Beth. “Naw” said the person. “Oh poo, what do we do now?” said Beth. “DOESN’T COUNT!” said Sadie and Katie.

“Now, before we interview the eliminated contestants, let’s see some never before seen clips over the last few episodes!” said Beth. The screen turned on and the footage begun. “Shush!” said Cody, sneaking into the girls trailer, while episode fourteen. Nobody was in the girls trailer and Cody snuck inside. Cody opened Courtney’s underwear drawer and took her pink underwear out.

“This is a keeper” whispered Cody. Heather walked past the girls trailer for a shower. Heather ran back and saw Cody in the girls trailer. “Is there a reason why you are in here?” said Heather. “Er… is this the guys cabin?” said Cody. “Ooooohh… stalker-licious!” said Heather, walking away. “Thank goodness” said Cody. Heather walked back. “Who’s underwear drawer is that?” said Heather. “Courtney’s” said Cody. “Mhm” said Courtney.

“Stalker-licious, huh?” said Beth. “Does Courtney even know that Cody did that?” said Bridgette. “Probably, or she may think it’s that Sarah stalker girl or whatever” said Beth. “Freaky girl” said Geoff. “I hope we don’t get stalked” said Bridgette. “Our relationship is a keeper” said Geoff. “You know what I want” said Bridgette. Bridgette and Geoff begun to make out. “This is not good for the TV screens!” said Beth.

“People make out all the time, dude” said Ezekiel. “I am a girl for your information. Let’s just move on” said Beth. The footage changed to Heather slipping on the ground. Heather got up and snuck into the girls trailer. She went near Courtney’s bunkbed and found Courtney’s PDA. Heather put it in the guys cabin under a bed. She would later put it in her pocket and grin. “Woah!” said LeShawna. “Gurl’s crazy” she continued.

“Let’s move onto our guests!” said Beth. Webby walked out and said, “Ello”. “Hello Webby!” said Beth. “Eww… the cow. Can I move on?” said Webby. “Look at the script” whispered Beth. “Err… pass!” said Webby, sitting next to Owen. “Dude said pass… let’s move on to Izzzzyyyy!” said Owen. “Err… next is Tyler” said Beth. Tyler walked out of the waiting room and kicked Beth in the face by accident, while trying to do a split. Tyler failed. “Ow!” they both said.

Beth begun to bleed. “We need a new host” said Ezekiel. “This show is totally like Adventure Time” said Harold. “That show is totally over-rated” said Noah. “Your mom’s uncle is underrated that I don’t even know her, eh” said Ezekiel. “Worst comeback ever” said Noah. “Thanks!” said Ezekiel.

“I hate that show, because they hurt pandas!” said DJ. A panda suddenly stared at DJ in its cage and growled. “Er… nice panda?” said Beth. The panda bit Beth’s finger. Beth’s finger begun to bleed. A few nurses took Beth out. “What now?” said Harold. “I’m baaaaack!” said DJ’s mother, sitting down. “Now sugah” said DJ’s mother to Webby. “Sugar?” said Webby. “NOT SUGAR!” said DJ’s mother, slapping Webby in the face. “SUGAH!” said DJ’s mother, walking back to her comfy seat.

Owen farted. “Someone open a window” said DJ’s mother. “NAW” said the intern. DJ’s mother got up to slap the intern. “Let’s just take a break” said Harold. “I SAY THAT!” said DJ’s mother. “Mom, relax” said DJ. “Okay Poopydoo!” said DJ’s mother, relaxing and sitting down. “Let’s call in Trent kid” said DJ’s mother, as Webby and Tyler sat down.

Trent came out and DJ’s mother said, “How does it feel to be eliminated?” “I am happy for Gwen, but I am upset for myself. But there’s always a chance for me to return” said Trent. “Return? When yo’ out, yo’ out!” said DJ’s mother. “You did not read the Code of Conduct, did you Mrs. DJ?” said LeShawna. “I have a name you know!” said DJ’s mother.

“Er… let me do this in song fashion” said LeShawna, dragging an old piano out. “Who knows how to play piano?” said LeShawan. “Poopydoo does, right?” said DJ’s mother. “Mhm” said DJ. “Now, I think it’s a good time to show the world how good you play” said DJ’s mother. “But I am… scared of playing in front of people” said DJ. “DO IT!” said DJ’s mother. “Sharp lady” whispered Ezekiel to Harold. Harold nodded.

“What did you say about me?” said DJ’s mother. “Err… nothing” said Ezekiel. “I bet it was nothing” said DJ’s mother, rolling her eyes. “Sounds like Chef’s sister” whispered Harold to Ezekiel. Ezekiel nodded. “And you continue to say nothing, foos!” said DJ’s mother.

DJ sat down and DJ begun to play the piano. LeShawna sung, “Let me sing a little tune, how your mother should (whisper: NOT) be like her. Her name is grrag and she is DJ’s mother and this tune is ending, so let’s go to a commercial”. The commercial didn’t turn on and LeShawna told DJ, “play something FAST!” DJ played "Galloping Gertie" by Sam Fonteyn.

DJ’s mother slapped LeShawna and dragged her into the waiting room. "OK. She’s not talking. All right? We're not going to be seeing her again for this epsode” said DJ’s mother. Uncomfortably, DJ said: “Momma?” “Yes Poopydoo” said DJ’s mother. “You are-- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” screamed DJ, putting his hands over his head and running off in fear.

“Not again” said DJ’s mother. “Let’s bring in the unsafe girl that I will bring into shape” said DJ’s mother. Izzy ran in the Aftermath studio. “Tell us about you” said DJ’s mother, trying to calm everyone down. “Okay. My name is Izzy and I am happy to be here. I think you all know me. For example, I see Sierra in the back row. I spilled the beans, silly beans. Haha. She’s probably confused on what I am talking about. I would be confused too, but I am speaking, so I am not. I like it how I speak fast sometimes. Owen doesn’t speak fast either though and same for Sierra. Sierra stalked Lindsay and took her underwear. Reminds me about what happened with Courtney’s underwear and the way she spazzed out about that. It wasn’t me who did that though. I was just watching what happened. Cody did it though, according to the clip. Can you make someone else do it. Maybe Lindsay. I would think the reaction by Courtney will be fun, especially when Lindsay calls her Corny or Cornhead or something like that. I find that funny, but I think I am the funniest and I don’t always try to be funny or target to be funny. Without funny moments, this show sucks, but I don’t know what will happen though, because I haven’t seen a show with funny bits. Haha. Wait, wasn’t I supposed to be talking about myself and not about the results from yesterday’s firework festival?” said Izzy, speed-talking.

Everyone looked at Izzy, very confused. “Can you repeat that again?” said Ezekiel. “I got lost after underwear” said Ezekiel. “Okay then. I just there was a rewind button to rewind what I said. Maybe you filmed this and we can watch live on what I did before. Maybe in slow motion. Wait, fast motion. That’ll be so funny. I will be laughing on the floor and--“ said Izzy, speed-talking. “Aren’t you supposed to repeat after underwear?” said Ezekiel. “What underwear are you talking about? The first, second, or Harold’s dirty underwear I found in the bathroom?” said Izzy. Everyone, but Harold laughed. “Didn’t your mom tell you to not make your underwear dirty? You teens are so confusing” said DJ’s mother. “So, can you repeat what you said?” said Ezekiel.

“Did I hear ‘where are the fireworks’, because here they are!” said Izzy, pressing a button and the firecracker went over the screen, glowing it. “Oooohhh, aaaahhhhh!” said the audience over and over again. “This won’t be pretty” said DJ’s mother.

The firecracker, however got out of the hand and the Aftermath studio got set on fire. “EVERY MAN FOR THEMSELVES!” said Izzy, trying to get out from the emergency exit. Everyone screamed. Izzy ran out and Owen got stuck in the door, as the firefighters came and Owen fell flat on the ground. Everyone walked on top of Owen and got out of the Aftermath studio.

“Join us next time for more Total Drama Action!” sad Izzy.

Chapter 19: The Princess Pride

“Last time on Total Dra-never mind, it was an aftermath, but I loved the ending, when Izzy burned down the studio. I need to pay more money though for ANOTHER one. Join us now for Mr. Chris in Total Drama Action!” said Chris.

(theme song plays in a fairy tail fashion)

“Once upon a time, there were six contestants remaining in the fairy tale, Total Drama Action and tho-“ said Chris, starting off the episode in studio nineteen. “Ooh! Me! Me! I love tails!” said Lindsay. “SILENT!” said Chris. “Sorry” said Lindsay. “And those contestants were Duncan, err… Little Green Riding Hood” said Chris.

“Little GREEN Riding Hood? I may take red for blood and black for hulk and stuff, but green? That’s like a… baby character” said Duncan. “Shush” said Chris, passing Duncan a costume. “And we also have… Bigfoot” said Chris. “Who is that?” said Heather. “You” said Gwen. “No, it’s Lindsay” said Chris.

“I don’t have big feet!” said Lindsay. “Your stalker” said Chris, staring at Cody. “Gave me proof of it” said Chris. Heather laughed. “Your mom’s foot is probably bigger than Noah” said Lindsay. “That twerp weighs like five pounds” said Heather, laughing. “Your dad is probably a sumo wrestler” said Lindsay. In the confessional, Heather said: “I hate. HATE. HATE! Sumo wrestlers”.

“Silent girls” said Chris. The girls shut up. “Good! Okay and next we have the eight dwarf, Izzy!” said Chris. “Izzy got eliminated, remember?” said Gwen. “Oh yeah, so then, you get the role!” said Chris, giving the costume to Gwen.

“Heather gets a… fork!” said Chris, giving Heather a fork. “Don’t hurt anybody with it” said Chris. In the confessional, Heather said: “I won’t hurt anybody, but I will hurt one of their costumes and my first victim… Gwen!” “Fine with me” said Heather. “Great” said Chris.

“Our final costume goes to Cody, who is… the frog prince!” said Chris. “Do I kiss Gwen now?” said Cody. “No” said Chris, giving Cody frog eyes. “What happened to Courtney?” said Duncan. Everyone stared at Duncan. “Like I care or anything” said Duncan.

“She is the princess. Whoever saves her from the flying penguin wins immunity!” said Chris. “Flying penguin?” said Gwen. “Penguins don’t fly” said Heather. “Yes they do. Because they are birds!” said Lindsay. “I see a bird, eh” said someone. “Eskimo!” said Lindsay. “It’s Ezekiel, idiot” said Heather.

“Ezekiel! I told you to shut up about birds!” said Chris. “Sorry, eh. I just saw one and it was really important!” said Ezekiel. In the confessional, Chris said: “Well, I guess now that Ezekiel is here, he can join the competition!” “Why is Eskimo here?” said Lindsay. “There was a fire, eh” said Ezekiel. “Was my paramedic friend there?” said Lindsay. “Yes” said Ezekiel.

“Oh my goodness!” said Lindsay, running off toward the burning aftermath studio. “What the heck is she doing?” said Chris. “She’s… being… STUPID” said Heather.

Tyler saw Lindsay running toward the fire. “Why is she running toward a fire?” said Noah, unamused. “Maybe she misses me!” said Tyler. Tyler ran to Lindsay, thinking she’ll hug him. Lindsay, however ran past Tyler toward the paramedic.

“Lindsay!” cried Tyler. “Don’t worry. She probably forgot who you are” said Noah. Lindsay ran to the paramedic and said, “Hi bestie”. “M’am. I suggest you get away. These flames are very dangerous!” said the paramedic. “That’s rude” said Lindsay. “Just doing my job” said the paramedic. “Maybe you should do it with your eyes closed” said Lindsay. The paramedic grunted. Someone screamed the paramedic opened their eyes.

“Remember me now bestie?” said Lindsay. “M’am, you are going to burn and die here” said the paramedic. “I am not a man” said Lindsay. “I didn’t say man, m’am” said the paramedic. “You did so!” said Lindsay. “I don’t recall that” said the paramedic. “What kind of a bestie are you? Even Heather’s a better friend than you!” said Lindsay, upset. “M’am, please stop crying” said the paramedic. “I AM NOT A MAN! I AM NOT A MAN!” Lindsay cried.

Lindsay ran toward Tyler again and Tyler ran toward Lindsay, but Lindsay ran past Tyler crying. “That’s what I mean on bad luck” said Noah, sighing. Lindsay soon returned and there was a fight going on between Chris and Duncan.

“So, you may need to kiss each other while the challenge, the girls need to kiss Cody the frog!” said Chris. “No way we need to kiss Courtney while the challenge” said Duncan. “You need to do the challenge or get eliminated” said Chris. “Eat it McLean! I QUIT!” said Duncan. Ezekiel gasped. “That is shocking, eh” said Ezekiel.

Courtney walked to Chris. “I demand more ice cream. It all melted!” said Courtney. “Shut up, your boyfriend quit!” said Chris. “You sure?” said Chris to Duncan. “I’ll be in the lame-o-sine outta here if you need me” said Duncan. Courtney and Gwen gasped.

“You can’t gasp over my boyfriend!” said Courtney. “I wasn’t err… gasping over your boyfriend. I was just shocked that he err… quit!” said Gwen. “Err… mhm. I know that’s who you are after for, but Duncan loves me and this love is in the books” said Courtney.

In the confessional, Courtney said: “When I had my PDA, I went nuts to make Duncan return and after all this hard work I did, the challenges, the vine swinging, the trailers, he QUITS?! If I want to marry him, he at least has to give me some rights. And when I become President, I am going to be the first female President ever. Even earlier than Megan Kline!”

In the confessional, Gwen said: “Don’t take any of this serious, Trent. I still like you and Duncan is my friend. I hope if you are watching this, that Duncan is just my friend and you are a bit more than my friend”. In the confessional, Courtney said: “Just you wait. Gwen is soon going to be going to be side by side by Duncan, wanting to make out”.

“Duncan is none of your boyfriends” said Lindsay. “He is mine!” said Courtney. “The love rules say that you need to write your name on him for him to be your boyfriend and he needs to write his name on you to be your girlfriend!” said Lindsay. “And I’ll believe the girl who thinks penguins fly!” said Courtney, rolling her eyes.

“Well, because Duncan quit and nobody seems like they want to do the princess challenge, I guess we can see who followed the rules I announced in the challenge and if everyone did, who will get voted off” said Chris.

At the Gilded Chris ceremony, Chris said: “Today, we have no Chris’!” “No fair!” said Courtney. “That means we all get eliminated?” said Lindsay. “Not really also Lindsay” said Chris. “Whoever’s costume is popped or is ripped once I get up here is automatically eliminated. If nobody’s costume is ripped, we need to have a voteout!” said Chris.

“By the way, Zeke is returning to the game!” said Chris. “But he wins the challenge, since he has no costume!” said Chris. “Awesome, eh. I am in it to win it!” said Ezekiel. “No fair! I am the Princess! I should get an extra chance!” said Courtney. “But the Princess has a costume, Princess. You are first!” said Chris.

In the confessional, Cody said: “This totally feels like a ball”. Heather grabbed her fork and went next to Cody, when he wasn’t looking. In the confessional, Heather said: “Courtney and Gwen may be on to me and Lindsay’s costume is just her foot which is so precious I can’t hurt it. That’s a joke by the way. The only person I can sabotage is Cody”.

Chris looked at Courtney’s princess costume and said: “You are safe tonight, Courtney!” “Lindsay, you are up” giggled Chris. Courtney walked to her seat, as Lindsay walked to Chris. “If I take off my shoe, will your promise that you won’t laugh at my foot?” said Lindsay. “Sure” said Chris, trying to hold his laughing in.

Lindsay took off her shoe and Chris fainted. “Who knows CQR?!” said Lindsay. “What?” said Courtney. “CQR!” said Lindsay. “Camels Quack Rabies?” said Ezekiel. “Ooh, I never knew that before” said Lindsay. Chris got up, laughing. “I thought you said you won’t laugh at my foot!” said Lindsay, sadly.

“I wasn’t laughing at your foot. I was laughing at how you thought CPR was CQR, but you were right. I was laughing at your foot” said Chris. “That is perfectly fi-Whaaaaaaaaaaat?” said Lindsay. “NEXT!” said Chris. In the confessional, Heather said: “Time to make my sharp move!” “Heather!” said Chris, as Heather was about to make a hole in Cody’s costume with her fork.

Heather walked up and showed Chris her fork, which was perfectly fine. “You may sit back down. You are safe also!” said Chris. Heather sat back down, next to Cody. Heather stabbed the fork on Cody’s frog eyes and a hole ripped. Cody did not notice this. “Next is Gwen!” said Chris. Gwen walked up perfectly fine with the dwarf hoodie.

“That’s exactly the same way it was when I gave it to you. Freaky…” said Chris. In the confessional, Chris said: “When will someone fail and get eliminated? I want this night off!” “Can I keep this?” said Gwen. In the confessional, Gwen said: “It is so comfy. Much better than the 1950 classic headphones”. “Naw, we need it” said Chris.

“Our last person up is Cody. If your costume is perfectly fine and no ‘flying penguin’ ate it, we need to have a vote” said Chris. Cody walked up and his frog eyes flopped and fell to the ground. The wind blew the green away, as all that was remaining was the fluff. “Heha… how did that happen?” said Cody. In the confessional, Heather said: “That was just perfect. I am really going to win this season. I have a fork, PDA and a way to get immunity each time its up for grabs!”

“Cody, I can’t believe I am saying this, but you are out!” said Chris. “But how did this happen? I thought I was friends with everyone and all the ladies?” said Cody. “Maybe you thought too much” said Heather, showing her fork. “You didn’t” said Gwen in shock. “I did” said Heather. “Didn’t you tell Heather that she can’t use a fork or anything?” said Gwen.

“To hurt someone, she didn’t hurt someone” said Chris. “But that’s unfair!” said Gwen. “Just playing the game” said Heather. “Grr…” said Chris. In the confessional, Chris said: “Who knew that both of our returnees will get eliminated? I did not see that coming!”

Cody waved to Gwen and walked in the lame-o-sine. “Join us next time for the spacetastic adventures of Rubert the Bear… no, wrong show. The spacetastic adventures of Total Drama ACTION!”

Chapter 20: 2010: A Space Heather

“Yo, it’s Chris McLean and last time on Total Drama Action, Duncan quit, because he didn’t want to kiss his GIRLFRIEND and Cody got eliminated, because of how dirty Heather played the game. Ezekiel did return though, but we should skip the safety rules and blast off into Total Drama ACTION!” said Chris.

(theme song plays)

Lindsay woke up and tugged on Gwen’s hair. Gwen woke up and said, “What?” “Want to star in a TV show?” said Lindsay. Gwen went back to bed. Lindsay pulled Gwen’s hair harder and Gwen fell out of the bed. “Ow Lindsay” said Gwen. In the confessional, Ezekiel said: “I am sleep spying, eh. Girls are annoying right now, eh”.

Heather woke up and laughed at Gwen. “Heather, want to star in my TV show?” said Lindsay. Courtney then woke up. “No” said Heather. “Gwen, want to be my BFF?” said Lindsay. “Err… will you stop annoying me if I become your BFF?” said Gwen. “Sure!” said Lindsay. “Err… fine” said Gwen.

“Haha! Gwen’s a snotbutt!” said Heather. “Gwen, please come with me to the bathroom” said Lindsay. “What are you going to do in there with me?” said Gwen. Lindsay snuck up behind Gwen randomly and whispered: “Whisper”. “Why are you there?” whispered Gwen. Lindsay walked in front of Gwen. Then, Gwen and Lindsay walked to the bathroom.

Gwen and Lindsay whispered several things for at least five minutes and they walked out. The trailer begun to shake. “EARTHQUAKE!” screamed Courtney. “MILKSHAKE?! Where’s the milkshake?!” said Lindsay. “I don’t see the problem about that, eh” said Ezekiel. “We may die!” said Courtney. Chris, over the loudspeaker said: “Chillax. Your trailer is going to blast off into space. We have attached it to the space-o-coaster!”

Ezekiel picked his nose and looked both ways for nobody who was looking at him. Ezekiel was about to eat his booger, when Lindsay turned around and said: “Silly Zeke, boogers are not for kids!” “Your only challenges are to survive the morning in this space-o-coaster and I’ll explain the other in… four hours!” said Chris, over the loudspeaker. “Four hours?!” said Gwen. “It’s okay bestie!” said Lindsay, hugging Gwen. In the confessional, Gwen said: “I think I am taking this bestie thing back”.

Right away, Heather said: “This is going to be perfect”, sarcastically. “Yes, eh. I have never been with four snotty girls before, especially on an coaster that rolls sorta-thing and on a reality television show” said Ezekiel. “Take that back” said Lindsay. In the confessional, Heather said: “I am not snotty. The rest of the girls are and Ezekiel probably ate a hula-hoop a few years ago and now eats hammer nails for breakfast”.

“Let’s all ignore each other for the next four hours, so they can go by fast” said Gwen. “Except me and you Gwen” said Lindsay. Gwen sighed. “Can I talk to you too?” said Ezekiel. “No” said Lindsay and Gwen. “Sure” said Heather. “Can you excuse us?” said Lindsay. Lindsay took Gwen’s hair and walked her to the bathroom. Gwen and Lindsay whispered several things for at least five minutes again and they walked out.

There was a silence, before Heather said: “Lindsay”. “Heather” said Lindsay. “Ezekiel” said Courtney. “Gwen” said Ezekiel. “Heather” said Gwen. “Lindsay” said Courtney. “Ezekiel” said Heather. Courtney coughed. “Courtney” said Ezekiel. “Tyler” said Lindsay. “Tyler isn’t here, eh” said Ezekiel. “I miss him with his cute green shirt like Ken” said Lindsay.

“Ken?” said Heather. “You know from Baby!” said Lindsay. Everyone stared at Lindsay. “I’m a Baby girl? In my baby world? The boots are plastic. And these words are fantastic” sung Lindsay. “I think you meant--“ said Ezekiel. “SHUT. UP” said Courtney, angrily. “For once, I agree with her, you little dirtbag!” said Heather.

“LITTLE?!” said Ezekiel, angrily. “You probably stand smaller than that man who is as small as a two foot hydrant” said Heather. “Oooh!” said Lindsay. “Like your dad” said Gwen. “Oooh!” said Lindsay. “At least I don’t cry at myself, because there’s a small pimple on the top of your head where your boyfriend can’t see that” said Heather. “Oo-wait, that was me. Sorry, I had the chicken polka dots that day” said Lindsay.

Heather growled. “Why are we acting like immature eight year olds?” said Courtney. “Why are your pants nearly up to your waste?” said Ezekiel. “Oooh!” said Lindsay. “You both probably don’t know the definition of fashion” said Courtney, rolling her eyes. “Do so!” said Lindsay. “What is it, eh?” said Ezekiel. “Anything but Heather!” said Lindsay. “You said BUTT!” said Ezekiel. “Stalker, much?” said Gwen. “Can me and you talk again” said Lindsay to Gwen. “Err… no tha--“ said Gwen.

“I take that as a yes!” said Lindsay, dragging Gwen to the bathroom. Gwen sighed. Gwen and Lindsay whispered several things for at least five minutes again and then, Lindsay peeked out. “Heather, we do not need your assistance anymore” said Lindsay. Lindsay walked back in and whispered some more with Gwen and then they both walked out.

“Assistance for…?” said Heather. “What?” said Lindsay. “You said assistance” said Heather. “I didn’t say that” said Lindsay. “Yes, you did” said Heather. “I know what I said” said Lindsay. “It’s like how Owen’s butt says how its full after fifteen pizza pies” said Ezekiel. Everyone stared at him. “Heather” said Lindsay. “Ezekiel, eh” said Ezekiel. “No, no, no. We are not doing this again” said Heather, getting ticked off with Lindsay and Ezekiel. “Gwen, we need to talk” said Lindsay.

Gwen stared at Lindsay. “Nooowwww…” said Lindsay. “Do we really need to go to the bathroom every ten minutes to talk about Heather?” said Gwen. Lindsay coughed and Heather said, “As snoopy and snotty as you are… I am really not surprised on how you made a friend with an dimwit, Gwen”. “Dimwit?!” said Lindsay, gasping. “Is this true? Is this what you call me?” said Lindsay.

“Errr… who wants… to paint Heather’s skin?” said Gwen. “What color?” said Heather. “Blue?” she continued, laughing. Gwen sighed and nodded. “I wonder why you got that. Oh yeah! Because you need to cover up your pimples on the top of your head. They look awful Gwen. Just like your parents. I do not want to see your mom’s ears at all” said Heather. “Gwen, can we talk in the bathroom now?” said Lindsay. “No” said Gwen. “But we are BFFs! We have to agree on everything in order to be that!” said Lindsay. “Well, let’s be friends and no BFFs!” said Gwen. Lindsay gasped. Soon, the ride when faster and Courtney puked. “Ewww” said Lindsay.

The ride slowed down, before it made a complete stop. Over the loudspeaker, Chris said: “Okay, okay, I am stopping this ride. You guys did awesome with the interaction part of the challenge. But you guys got a bit annoying and we weren’t even one hour in the challenge. I even liked the insults Gwen”. “What about me? I had great insults” said Heather. “Those were just terrible, Heather. I knew I should’ve got a stalker character in the cast instead of you” said Chris, over the loudspeaker. Gwen laughed.

“Everyone get out of the ride and report to studio” said Chris, before he begun to count. “Twenty” he continued. Ezekiel opened the door and walked out, but begun to fall down. Lindsay and Gwen followed, as Heather and Courtney watched. “BFFs! EEEEEEEEEEE!” squealed Lindsay. “SHUT. UP!” yelled Gwen. “I thought we were friends, not like HEATHER” said Lindsay. “We are friends and I appriacte it, but not at a time when we can die!” said Gwen. Lindsay and Gwen landed in a bush in studio twenty, as Ezekiel landed in a comet. “Get out, Zeke” said Chris. “Woah, you can afford for that?” said Gwen. “Mhm” smiled Chris.

“Can you get me down from here?” said Heather, still on the space-o-coaster with Courtney. “Hey! What about me?” said Courtney. “We’ll worry about you when the winner gets off” said Heather. “And I will be the winner” said Courtney. “No, you won’t” said Heather. “Prove it” said Courtney. Heather reached for her pocket and grabbed for her PDA. “Will you excuse me for a minute” said Heather. “No fair” said Courtney, chasing after Heather.

Heather locked the bathroom door and called for her lawyers. “Can you come over and get me down from this coaster thing” said Heather. Right away, Heather closed the PDA and her lawyers ran out of the airplane to the space-o-coaster. A few put a trampoline down, as the others went in and told Heather, “it’s ready”. Heather jumped off onto the trampoline.

“Me next!” said Courtney, jumping. At this time, the lawyers packed up the trampoline and went in the airplane, flying back to wherever they came. In the confessional, Heather said: “That is the way I am winning. I am the best out of these rest!” Courtney fell to the ground. “This final challenge will prove who will win immunity” said Chris, once everyone came. “What is the challenge?” said Heather. “However can survive the longest on the Vomit Comet!” said Chris. “Vomit Comet? Why is it called that?” said Lindsay. “You’ll see” said Chris.

“Whoever answers this trivia question correct gets a five second advantage in this challenge” said Chris. “That’s bad, right?” said Lindsay. “No Lindsay, it’s good” said Chris. “What movie genre is this?” said Chris. “Sleep!” said Lindsay. “Wild Weirdo Cowboy Movie?” said Ezekiel. Heather facepalmed. In the confessional, Heather said: “Those idiots can be in an alliance with me. With them, I can easily boot Ms. Uptight Custardbutt off and Ms. I Have Blue Skin But I Can Not Admit That Boo Hoo and then, I can get Zeke to eliminate Lindsay and that’s the game. We are down to the final two and I’ll easily beat him, because he’s stupid”. “This is a science fiction movie” said Heather. “Nope” said Chris. “What?” said Heather.

“It’s not a science fiction movie” Chris continued. “It’s a space movie” said Gwen. “Ding! Gwen gets a five second advantage for the challenge” said Chris. “No fair. That is exactly the same” said Heather. “Not exactly” said Chris. “ARGH!” said Heather, walking away. “And Gwen can pick the order. I’ll go first, Lindsay can go second, Courtney can go third, Zeke can go fourth and Heather goes last” said Gwen. “Grrr…” said Heather.

Gwen walked in the vomit comet. “GO!” she said, getting buckled. The vomit comet shaked around for a while and Gwen said: “STOP!” Chris stopped the Vomit Comet and said: “Eight seconds. Pathetic”. “What about my extra five?” said Gwen. “Oh yeah, thirteen. Still kinda pathetic” said Chris.

“Lindsay’s up!” said Chris. “Up. Up. Up. WHERE?!” sung Lindsay. Chris facepalmed and Gwen threw Lindsay into the vomit comet. “Is this my new car and--“ said Lindsay, as Chris shaked the vomit comet around. Lindsay barfed. “Do you want to stop?” said Chris, watching Lindsay. “But this is my new car, right?” said Lindsay. “No” said Chris. “Oh, then STOP!” said Lindsay. “You managed to stay on for twenty nine seconds, but subtract five for the barfing, equaling twenty four seconds!” said Chris. “YAY!” said Lindsay.

Courtney said: “I refuse to do this challenge, because I am not allowed to sit or touch this really gross barf and I believe you wouldn’t do it either”. “Fine, no points for Courtney” said Chris. In the confessional, Courtney said: “I won’t get eliminated, I won’t get eliminated”. Courtney then looked in her bag for a snack and found a Mac laptop. “Where is this from?” she said.

A flashback was shown after episode three of Total Drama Action, when Courtney called up her lawyers. “We got you a new laptop, boss” said a lawyer. “A MAC?!” said Courtney. “We use them and it’s a lot better than all the other systems, boss” said the lawyer. “Screw you” said Courtney, hanging up, angrily.

“Well, I am guessing now is a good time to use this” said Courtney, smiling and opening it up. It said “Loading…” for a few minutes. “ARGH!” said Courtney, angrily.

Ezekiel walked in the vomit comet and sat down. After three minutes of shaking, Ezekiel yelled: “STOP!” “About time” said Heather. “Three minutes and fifteen seconds!” said Chris. “Heather, you may beat this score and win immunity. Are you up to it?” said Chris. “No” smiled Heather.

In the confessional, Heather said: “I can easily convince Ezekiel to eliminate Gwen if I do something completely stupid and I need to blindside Lindsay into thinking that Gwen’s not her friend”.

“Ezekiel wins immunity! Time to vote kiddies!” said Chris. “So, who are we voting for?” said Gwen. “It’s quite obvious that Heather we will pick Heather to go” said Courtney. “Ezekiel, can you follow me away from these loons?” said Heather. “Sure, eh” said Ezekiel, following Heather. “I think we should vote Heather too” said Lindsay. “Fine, let’s all vote Heather off” said Gwen.

“I need you to vote Gwen off with me and I need you to do me a giant favor” said Heather. “What is it?” said Ezekiel. “I need you to give me immunity” said Heather. “But, what if you are lying and they vote me off, eh?” said Ezekiel. “We can worry about that if it happens” said Heather. Ezekiel and Heather looked at each other. “Fine, but you owe me, eh” said Ezekiel.

In the confessional, Heather said: “Thank you, homeschool!”

At the Gilded Chris ceremony, Chris said: “And the Chris’ go to: Ezekiel, Lindsay and Courtney”. Ezekiel, Courtney and Lindsay walked up to get their Gilded Chris’. Gwen and Heather looked confident. “The final Gilded Chris goes to…” said Chris.

“GWEN!” said Chris, handing Gwen a Gilded Chris. “Oh boo hoo, I go home” said Heather. “YAY!” said Lindsay. In the confessional, Gwen said: “Finally”. “Wait, maybe I can give her my immunity idol, eh” said Ezekiel. “Can he do that?” said Heather. “Sure” said Chris. “Then, I give my immunity idol thingie to Heather, eh” said Ezekiel.

“That means Heather is safe for elimination!” said Chris. Heather walked over and slapped Gwen. “Goodbye Gwennie” said Heather, pushing her into the lame-o-sine. “But…” said Gwen, as the lame-o-sine drove away.

“Harsh moves by Heather, harsh moves by someone like Zeke, harsh flashback by Courtney. Join us next time for more harshness on Total Drama Action!” said Chris.

Chapter 21: One Million Bucks, B.C.

“One step for mankind was to watch last time on Total Drama Action. We had a space-tastic space ride and in the end, Heather convinced Zeke to give her his immunity and when Heather was in the final two, Zeke used it and Heather was safe, leaving Gwen to blast outta here. Now, we are going to have a prehi-“ said Chris, before a bird soared above him. “WATCH OUT!” said Chris.

(theme song plays)

A flashback was shown that Lindsay snuck into Chris’ trailer and took a television into the trailer. In the confessional, Lindsay said: “I wanted to watch new episodes of Milkshakes: The Dog Alien!” Lindsay watched an episode when everyone was sleeping and rewatched it over and over again. “Can you put a stop to that?” said Heather, waking up because of the light.

“Okay” said Lindsay. Heather went back to bed and Lindsay watched it again. “Why does the aliens keep dying over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again and keep coming back to life over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again!” complained Lindsay. The television suddenly exploded. “No more Milkshakes” sighed Lindsay. Everyone woke up.

“What happened now?” said Heather, angrily. Over the loudspeaker, Chris said: “What happened was that the television that I set out purposely for someone to take, Lindsay… exploded and as you probably can’t see, we are in a… prehistoric studio!”

“Didn’t we do a jungle movie or whatever ten episodes ago?” said Heather. “Correct Heather, but this is a prehistoric movie. Prehistoric movies are a lot different than jungle movies” said Chris. “No they aren’t. They both have grass and me in them!” said Lindsay. “I am going to ignore that last comment and come to the studio to announce your challenge. McLean out” said Chris. Ten minutes later, Heather said: “Where is he?”

“Maybe he wanted to give a midnight snack to Dino Claus!” said Lindsay. “Who is that?” said Heather. “It was on the Milkshakes: The Dog Alien show with special guest Mike D. Sam-U-Clawz” said Lindsay. “Interesting…” said Heather. “I demand to sleep in beds and not on the floor of a studio that has plastic everywhere” said Courtney. “We can’t always get what we want, can we?” said Heather, calling someone on the PDA. “Shut up” said Courtney.

“Beds, yes. One, yes. One min, thanks!” said Heather. An airplane flew down to the studio and threw a bed down. Immediately, Lindsay ran toward the bed. “NO LINDSAY!” yelled Heather and Courtney. Lindsay fell asleep a foot away from the bed, as the plane took off. Heather and Courtney exchanged looks and both of them ran to the bed.

Courtney ran to the bed first and pushed Heather away. “Back off. This is my bed!” said Courtney. Heather reached for her PDA and tried to call someone again, but the connection was off. “Disconnected?! This sucks” said Heather. Ezekiel and Heather soon fell to sleep and nearly ten minutes later, footsteps bounced the final four around.

“LINDSAY! What did I tell you about watching TV?!” said Heather. “I didn’t watch TV this time, I was sleeping” said Lindsay. “I think this was one of the big toots by LeShawna I was dreaming of for a while ago” said Ezekiel. “Are you like obsessed with her?” said Courtney. “No, eh. The reason why I think about her and talk about her is because she looks exactly like my bull” said Ezekiel. In the confessional, Heather said: “Homeschool really has no taste in the real world and today, does he?”

Chris then blew a horn, straddling everyone. “What is happening here?” said Courtney. “It is quite obvious that Owen made a giant blast and fought a LeShawnasarous in a fart contest” said Ezekiel. Everyone stared at Ezekiel. “I never heard about a LeShawnasarous dinosaur before” said Lindsay. In the confessional, Courtney said: “Dream on homeschool”.

Chris walked over to the castmates, loudly bouncing them up and down again. “Today’s challenge is--“ said Chris, over a loud horn. “Tonight’s challenge you mean, eh” said Ezekiel. “Shouldn’t you speak quiet, because it is mean to the other animals sleeping around here?” said Lindsay. “Animals like you? Ha! No, it’s not mean. I am announcing that today’s challenge is a duel. We are going to have three duels!” said Chris.

“In the dark?” said Heather. “With no light?” said Ezekiel. “And no lipgloss?” said Lindsay. Everyone stared at Lindsay. “What? I usually get some lipgloss on in the morning” said Lindsay. “You all will be on top of this… thing…” said Chris, pointing at two giant carved rocks, nearly ten feet each. “Who’s up first?” said Courtney. “You and Zeke” said Chris.

“Nice, eh. But, I can’t hit a girl with my own two hands!” said Ezekiel. “That doesn’t matter” said Chris. “It doesn’t?!” said Ezekiel. In the confessional, Ezekiel sung a few lines of “Never Gonna Give You Up”. “Because, we have giant… bone things!!” said Chris, handing Ezekiel and Courtney each a bone.

The camerman turned off the camera, as Courtney and Ezekiel mysteriously got up on the giant carved rocks. The cameraman turned the camera on. “How did that happen?” said Ezekiel. “The rules are to not fall down and… that just about it” said Chris. “Let’s go homeschool. BRING IT ON!” said Courtney. Ezekiel immediately lost his balance and fell in the tar, located below the giant carved rocks. In the confessional, Courtney said: “I didn’t even had to tie him up on the giant carved rock to make him fall. I have an easy ticket to winning immunity!”

In the confessional, Ezekiel barfed out the tar. “Okay, Courtney is moving to the final round” said Chris. “Without a hit by me or homeschool down there” said Courtney, smiling. “Oh please… watch the master make Lindsay fall” said Heather. “Lindsay and Heather, you are up!” said Chris, handing them both a bone. The camerman turned off the camera once again, as Lindsay and Heather mysteriously got up on the giant carved rocks. The cameraman turned the camera on again.

“And GO!” said Chris. “Eating contest?!” said Lindsay. In the confessional, Heather said: “That may be a good way to make me get a plan. She is going to try to eat the bone… like a dog and then, I can easily knock her off!” “Hey Lindsay! If you eat the bone, you get to win the challenge!” said Heather. “I DO?!” said Lindsay.

“Mhm” smiled Heather. “But I am not a dog, silly beans” said Lindsay. In the confessional, Heather said: “Silly beans?” In the confessional, Ezekiel said: “I had some funny beans for dinner yesterday night. Or were those… mighty beans!” Ezekiel barfed the beans out. “I am having a good day health-wise” said Ezekiel.

Lindsay whacked Heather on the legs with the bone. “Ow, that hurt. My legs are probably black and blue… and no, not that blue you loner goth idiot, but black and blue because of that, Lindsay” said Heather. A prehistoric bird begun to attack Heather and eat pieces of her hair. “GET OFF OF ME!” yelled Heather, hitting and kicking the bird away. The bird wouldn’t move and Heather said: “You know what?! I don’t care if I win this dumb challenge. I am going to take a shower”. “That’s the ninth one this day!” said Lindsay. “If you have problems, call my lawyers!” said Heather. “Ooh! What’s their phone number?” said Lindsay.

“ARGH!” screamed Heather, who jumped off the carved rock to the plastic grass and exited studio twenty-one. “Harsh” said Chris. “You are lucky you don’t have to sleep near her, eh” said Ezekiel. Chris walked away from Ezekiel. “I deem Lindsay the winner of duel two! This duel will tell us who will win the reward!” said Chris.

Courtney suddenly appeared on the top of the carved rock and Chris said: “This duel will tell us who will win the reward and who will cry themselves to sleep!” “And GO!” said Chris. Lindsay whacked Courtney in the feet, like Heather. “Ow. You are going to pay, Lindsay!” said Courtney, kicking Lindsay on the right arm.

Then, Courtney heard Lindsay saying “use the force”. Courtney grabbed the bone and hit Lindsay in the head, knocking her off. “’COURTNEY WINS THE REWARD!” said Chris. “Reward?” said Courtney. “I got kicked, beat up, slept with these losers and woke up this early to win a REWARD?!” said Courtney.

“Isn’t that great?! Your reward is a prehistoric bird toy, which has a string you ca--“ said Chris, showing Courtney the prehistoric bird, before she took it and ripped the bird.

“What will you do now, smart guy?” said Courtney. “I will sign this episode off, by saying: What will happen to all the prehistoric birds? And will Courtney get ranked last in Sierra’s blog? And…” said Chris.. “Who’s Sarah?” said Lindsay. “Find out these questions and more next time on Total Drama ACTION!” said Chris.

Chapter 22: Crouching Lindsay, Hidden Zeke

“Yabba Dabba” said Chris, before someone was heard in the trailers saying: “Oh poo!” “Thanks for screwing that up!” said Chris, angrily. “Last time on Total Drama Action, Lindsay stole an exploding television from my comfy trailer and it exploded, leading them into studio… twenty… one? Or whatever. I don’t keep track of the studios. Ezekiel fell off while the challenge and Heather needs a shower while the challenge, leaving Courtney and Lindsay in the final two for it. However, Courtney knocked Lindsay off and went nuts over a reward challenge. Don’t get nuts at this one though, because this is an elimination challenge… NOT! Now, join us more for the kick (bleep) Total Drama Action episode!”

(theme song plays)

The cast woke up outside. “Another prehistoric challenge? Argh. I am going to take a shower” said Heather, walking away. In the confessional, Courtney said: “Heather has got to not take a shower each time she wants it”.

Chris suddenly swooped in and kicked Heather back to everyone else. “OW!” said Heather, repeatedly. “I am calling my lawyers” said Heather, reaching for her PDA. Chris kicked the PDA. “Owwaowwwwaow!” said Chris, as Heather walked back to the castmates. “Today’s challenge is the kick (bleep) challenge” said Chris. “You can’t say that word on television” said Courtney. In the confessional, Courtney said: “The little kiddos don’t need a large vocabulary at a young age. Who saw that show last year when that boy swore at that girl, when she tried to sell lemonade? That is not a good vo--“.

“You are all seventeen, or you should be. You guys should know that word by now” said Chris. “But it’s not appropriate for our younger viewers” said Courtney. “Which young people will watch this show?” said Chris. “Dr. Drew” said Ezekiel. “Nobody” said Courtney. “Everyone” said Chris.

“Let’s just call this a kung fu challenge, just to make you happy” said Chris. “Thank you” said Courtney. In the confessional, Courtney said: “And when I get elected President, I’ll enforce rules for young boys and girls who swear, like you can’t sa--“. “Today is a two part challenge. The first part is ten minute kung fu training and then a battle. The teams for this are… Courtney and Ezekiel” said Chris. In the confessional, Courtney said: “And I won’t let homeschool people do things with smarter people who kn--“

“And Lindsay and Heather. I think we have a good challenge coming along, right Chef?” said Chris. “I had to pay the people who make these my third paycheck of the decade” said Chef, angrily, throwing Chris two giant suits.

“TRAIN!” said Chris. Heather and Lindsay walked one way, as Ezekiel and Courtney walked the other way. “I hate you and you hate me, but we need to win this challenge, so just pretend that they are me and beat them up” said Heather. “I am not doing this. I will control you and you’ll get whoever they take out” said Courtney. “But, they are girls, eh” said Ezekiel. “Who cares? You aren’t actually hitting them, the robot is and I am” said Courtney. “Oh” said Ezekiel. In the confessional, Ezekiel said: “I don’t really trust that, eh”.

Ten minutes passed and Chris said: “TIME IS UP! Who wants their--“. Chris looked at the new cameraman, who was looking away from him. “Err… hello? Mr. New Camera Guy?” said Chris. The cameraman didn’t answer. “Zeke, Zeke, hit him with a stick” said Chris. Ezekiel threw a log at the cameraman and knocked him out.

“Is he dead?” said Lindsay. “I think he is” said Chris. “Let’s just have a moment of silence to remember him” said Courtney. Everyone was silent for a few seconds, before the cameraman jumped up and ran away screaming: “YOU GUYS ARE NUTS!” “Weird-o…” said Chris. “Anyways, who wants their kung fu costume?” said Chris. “HANNAH DOES!” said Lindsay. “No, I don’t” said Heather. Chris passed Heather a kung fu costume. “There you go” he smiled. “LINDSAY!” yelled Heather.

“What the doctor ordered” said Lindsay. “You call yourself a doctor? You are brainless. Your brain moved to Owen’s stomach years ago” said Heather. “No it didn’t” said Lindsay. Heather put on the kung fu costume. In the confessional, Heather said “We are defiantly going down”. Suddenly the chair moved back and Heather fell to the floor. “Argh. Stupid costume” she said.

“For reasons by Heather’s lawyers, Heather cannot face Courtney, but can face Ezekiel!” said Chris, passing Ezekiel another suit. “That has my name on it!” said Lindsay, taking it and dragging it away. “That’s the name of the company, eh” said Ezekiel. “I have a company? EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” said Lindsay. Chris gave Ezekiel another suit. “Don’t lose it this time” said Chris. Ezekiel put it on and Chris gave Courtney and Lindsay controllers. “You know how to work these, right?” said Chris. Courtney nodded yes, but Lindsay nodded no.

“Fine, let the games begin!” said Chris. Lindsay shook the controller up and down and nothing worked. However, Courtney pushed around the levers and buttons and Ezekiel kicked Heather and jumped on her. “Ouch” said Chris. “How do you work this thing?” said Lindsay. “LINDSAY! YOU ARE A FRICKIN’ LITTLE (bleep)” said Heather, smacking Lindsay to the ground. In the confessional, Courtney said: “And you cannot speak like that in public to the en--“.

Lindsay put a thumbs up on the ground. Heather kicked Ezekiel, punched him and pushed him. “Ow, eh. I thought we were play fight--“ said Ezekiel, as Courtney pressed more buttons. “Ing” said Ezekiel, jumping and sitting on Heather’s suit. In the confessional, Courtney said: “And nobody will able to tou--“

“Say mercy to the Zekester, eh” said Ezekiel. “Never” said Heather, getting up and throwing Ezekiel to the ground and walked toward him. Ezekiel suddenly got up and jumped on Heather. “I wasn’t trying to do that. Get up you idiot” complained Courtney. Ezekiel got up and Heather begun to punch him. Courtney moved more buttons around, making Ezekiel punching him.

A part of Heather’s suit fell off and Lindsay said, “Hannah, your butt fell off!” “No, it didn’t Lindsait” said Heather, punching Ezekiel. “Yes it is” said Lindsay. “If it fell off, I would have been dead” said Heather. “You died?! YAY!” said Lindsay. “Argh, you know nothing” said Heather, kicking Ezekiel to the ground.

In the confessional, Courtney said: “And you cannot use suits that will lose pieces while--“. “This isn’t kung fu, this is more of wrestling” said Chris. In the confessional, Courtney said: “But you can’t say something and instead mean something else, because that is just--“.

Heather then sat on Ezekiel. “My final words to LeShawna. If you were a booger, I’d pick you and then eat you first. Yum, your butt can work in McDonalds” said Ezekiel. “Heather and Lindsay move on to the next level” said Chris. “I was about to kick some (bleep)” said Heather. In the confessional, Courtney said: “And they are still swearing. They can’t say a swear when I get el--“.

“Level? I should win this because I actually worked to win” said Heather. “But Lindsay helped too” said Chris. “Yeah Hannah. What now?!” said Lindsay. “Heather, Zeke, you guys are going to cook food for this challenge” said Chris. Courtney and Ezekiel walked to Chef and begun to cook something, as Heather and Lindsay watched.

Five minutes later, Chef took the food out of the bowl and said, “This stupid challenge is to chase after this little food and eat it. Person who does so gets a buffet!” “And immunity, right?” said Heather. “No, no elimination. Just a buffet” said Chef. “No way I am chasing after food just to win a buffet” said Heather. “Then, Lindsay wins the buffet” said Chef. “Can I eat that thing now?” said Lindsay. “No, you get the buffet” said Chef. “But I need to win the challenge” said Lindsay, snatching the small food from Chef and eating it.

“Fine, you get the buffet. Now, shut up” said Chef. In the confessional, Heather said: “And I still get what I want despite how I didn’t compete in the challenge. I am so winning this million and there’s no downfall for me!” In the confessional, Courtney said: “I worked hard, Zeke failed, I deserve that buffet and if I win the election one day, I’ll get all the buffets I would ever want, but I won’t get fat because--“. Heather ran to the craft services tent and begun to eat the buffet.

“Join us next time for the mysteriously awkward episode of Total Drama Action!” said Chris.

Chapter 23: Get a Clue, Lindsay

“Last time on Total Drama Action, Heather kicked some butt, not (beep) Courtney” said Chris. Courtney growled. “I didn’t say (beep)” said Chris. Courtney continued to growl. “That girl has problems” whispered Chris to the screen. Courtney grabbed a chair and threw it at Chris. Chris ducked. “So, Zeke and Courtney” said Chris, as he moved away once Courtney threw a table at him. “Girl has strength” whispered Chris. “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” screamed Courtney, jumping on top of Chris. “Man down! CALL THE POLICE! CALL THE FRICKIN’--“ said Chris, on the ground.

(theme song plays)

The cast was in the Mess Hall and Chris was wheeled in. “Courtney, you need a time out” said Chris, in his wheelchair, drinking some soda. “I won’t ‘time out’” said Courtney. “Or else you’ll be eliminated and never, ever, ever, ever, EVER, ever, ever, ever, ever, EVER, ever, ever come back” said Chris. “That’s a lot of evers” said Lindsay. “Mhm” said Chris. Courtney walked to a different side of the craft services tent.

Chef then walked into the craft services tent and said: “Here ye, here ye, here--“ “I hear you. Gosh” said Lindsay. “SHUT UP. Here ye, here ye” said Chef. Chef grabbed a bell from his shirt and begun to rung it. “Here ye, here ye…” he continued. “We get it” said Heather. “SHUT UP! FIVE MORE! Here ye, here ye, here ye, here ye, here ye” said Chef.

“What is so important that it needed fifteen here yees?” said Heather. “Twelve here yees you mean. Now let me explain you why I hear yeed twelve times before the train leaves the station” said Chef. “Train?” said Lindsay and Ezekiel at the same time. “What station? The gas station? I know where that is!” said Heather. “That’s not near the mall” said Lindsay. “It didn’t have to be near the mall. It’s Owen” said Heather.

In the confessional, the purple haired girl named Sierra said: “After reviewing and re-reviewing and re-re-reviewing the clips through the series, I noticed that each time Owen breaths at night, his butt kinda toots. I also noticed that Cody brushes his teeth with a blue toothbrush to match his favorite color”. In the confessional, Chris said: “Stalker alert”.

“That means go to studio twenty two for your stupid challenge” said Chef. “I don’t care about trains. I get trainsick” said Heather. “C’mon Heather. We get to go to the mall!” said Lindsay, running off with Courtney and Ezekiel. “I don’t care” said Heather. “If you miss the train, you get eliminated” said Chris. “Wait for me guys!” yelled Heather, chasing after Ezekiel, Courtney and Lindsay.

Over the loudspeaker on the train, Chef said: “Today’s challenge is the mystery movie. You are going to need some DNA…” “Diego Never Ate?” said Ezekiel. “Who noticed if you spell Diego a different way, it can be Go die?!” said Lindsay. “SHUT UP MAGGOTS!” yelled Chef. Lindsay and Ezekiel gulped. “We have a somewhat special guest riding wi--“ said Chef. DJ’s mother beat Chef up and tied him up to a pole. “A really special guest on the train coming to you!” said DJ’s mother, untying Chef.

In the control panel, Chris said: “I wonder how she got an internship degree in college and told us one hour ago”. “Please put on the seat belts and wear pillows due to crashes. We also have flashlights everywhere if there is a problem and please don’t put your nose picking on the seat. That’s just nasty” said DJ’s mother. Ezekiel wiped it off on his pants. DJ’s mother begun to drive the train.

The lights flickered twice. “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” screamed Lindsay. “That’s why we have the flashlights, idiot” said Courtney. “No, my shoe is gone!” said Lindsay. Everyone looked at Lindsay. “Your foot grew bigger, eh” said Ezekiel. “You should not be the judge of that” said Lindsay. “I judged many things before, including the trial of Courtney, Duncan and Gwen’s relationship triangle” said Ezekiel. “You WHAT?!” said Courtney. “Nothing, eh” said Ezekiel.

An angry Courtney tied Ezekiel to the door. “That should teach you a lesson” she said, before the lights flickered again. Something was getting cut and once the lights turned back on, Lindsay looked at her feet and said: “Both of my shoes are gone!” “What’s going on in here?” said Heather, noticing that her pants had flowers and hearts cut out. “You obviously became nicer” said Lindsay. “No I didn’t” said Heather.

“TWSS” said Ezekiel. “What does that mean?” said Heather. “That’s What She Spelled” said Ezekiel. “I didn’t spell anything” said Heather and Lindsay at the same time. “ARGH!” yelled Heather. “I need a vacation” said Lindsay. “I need a shower” said Heather, walking to the right. Lindsay followed. “If you need to walk away, do it the other way from me” said Heather. “I walked there first!” said Lindsay. “No you didn’t” said Heather. “Oh yes I did” said Lindsay. “Oh no you--“ said Heather, before the lights flickered.

When the lights were on again, Heather’s shirt was gone and she was wearing a bra only. “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” screamed Heather. “Ouch” said Ezekiel. Heather found more roped and tied it around Ezekiel’s mouth. “Have fun, twerp!” said Heather. “Now, where was I?” said Heather, walking to the right and throwing Lindsay to the left. Heather walked to the front of the train, thinking that Chef would be there.

Chef was lying on the ground and DJ’s mother stared at Heather. “What are you doing here?” said Heather. “Put on a shirt, please. Your mother should know better” said DJ’s mother. Over the loudspeaker, DJ’s mother said: “Was there a catfight in train seventeen?”

“MEOW!” yelled Lindsay. “I am coming over there right now!” said DJ’s mother. The lights flickered again, as DJ’s mother walked toward the train car door. DJ’s mother opened the door and noticed that Courtney and Lindsay were having a pillow fight. “No fighting in here!” she yelled, taking the pillows away.

Lindsay and Courtney grabbed another one and begun to fight, as the lights turned off again and Heather and Chef, still on the ground mysteriously went to the cast car door. “So, I don’t get it eh” said Ezekiel, who somehow managed to get untied. “You don’t get what?” said Courtney. “Didn’t I put a rope on your mouth?” said Heather. “Chillax, y’all. But if we are here and Chris and nobody else is on the train, WHO IS DRIVING THE TRAIN!?” said Ezekiel. “Well, nobody is, so we are all sa- HOLY CRAP! Nobody is driving the train!” said DJ’s mother.

DJ’s mother rushed to the steering wheel, which was gone. The wheel rolled into the train the cast was in. “What’s this?” said Heather. DJ’s mother took the wheel, which was trying to get away. “How did this happen?” said DJ’s mother. In the control panel, Chris said: “Strings, gotta love ‘em”. Heather’s shirt flew around the room, suddenly. “What’s going on here?!” said Lindsay. “Every sexy lady for themselves!” said Heather, jumping off the train. “That includes you Zeke” said Heather, watching Ezekiel put his head out of the window.

Heather begun to run toward the showers and begun to laugh evilly. “That girl has problems” said DJ’s mother, watching Heather run off. The plane stopped again and suddenly a boom was heard. Half of the cast’s train was stomped on by a giant monster. “Lindsay, was that your foot” said Ezekiel, who managed to walk around. “I tied you up” said Courtney. “I got untied” said Ezekiel. “I want you to stop bickering and start telling your parents to learn to teach you discipline. Poopydoo has it, so you should to” said DJ’s mother.

“Poopy stirred in the doo doo?” said Lindsay. “You sound like Owen’s mother” said Courtney. “If she was Owen’s mom, she would’ve ate you!” said Ezekiel. “Where are we anyways?” said Lindsay. “I can’t get to the front of the train!” said DJ’s mother. “We need somebody to get a way to see where are we heading!” said Lindsay. Courtney noticed a ladder. “Go up there Ezekiel” said Courtney. “No, kids aren’t supposed to go up there” said DJ’s mother.

“We are teens already. Grow up lady” said Courtney. DJ’s mother grabbed her bag and swung it at Courtney’s face. “My way or the highway” said DJ’s mother. “I like the highway” said Ezekiel. DJ’s mother threw Ezekel out of the train. “Any objections?” said DJ’s mother. Ezekiel stayed on the back of the train, as DJ’s mother looked out the window. Lindsay snuck up the ladder and said out of the train: “What a nice day? Hi nice butterfly! Butterflies want to make me sing a song. Let’s sing the butterknive song!”

“Ooo, your face, in my glands. Ooo, oo, oo, oo, oo, oo, oo, oo, it's you and meeee! And you and me makes weee. You and me-e-e-e-e-e-e-eee like butterknives we're free! We're freeeee!” sung Lindsay. DJ’s mother suddenly looked around for Lindsay. She looked out the other window and saw Ezekiel trying to go in the train. DJ’s mother gave Ezekiel a pillow and a band-aid. “Thanks!” said Ezekiel. DJ’s mother pushed him again and Ezekiel climbed up and saw Lindsay.

“Ezekiel! You need to listen to this!” said Lindsay. Lindsay begun to sing to the beat of Party in the USA, “So we are about to die and birds will cry, you know that things are cool. We should’ve went back to school, but the momma that stirred poo told us that she would have done so too. It’s a party up in the train, yeeeaaaah, it will not rain!”

Suddenly, thunder crashed and rain begun to pour. “I am scared of RAIN! Must need fiber!” said Ezekiel, running in the train. DJ’s mother looked for Lindsay and Ezekiel came down the ladder and kissed DJ’s mother once he came down, both of them not noticing each other. “Really, now? REALLY?!” said DJ’s mother, kicking Ezekiel out of the train, again.

The train went past a fire and Lindsay said: “Wait a second, someone is controlling the train. We can’t be magically flying!” The train suddenly crashed into a rock and everyone got out safely. Chris, in his wheelchair reached studio fifty-seven thousand and said: “Lindsay wins immunity. She knew… what we were doing. Now, she gets to watch BADMINTION: THE MOVIE as her reward!” “Yaaaay!” said Lindsay. “We saw that movie ninty times in episode fifteen, you would seriously want to watch it again?” said Courtney. “With you Corny!” said Lindsay. “No” said Courtney, walking away. Lindsay grabbed Courtney and dragged her to a different studio to watch the movie.

“Vote someone off once you are done” Chris yelled. In the elimination ceremony, DJ’s mother glared at the final four. “Okay, so these whatever you call thems that shouldn’t be given out, because they aren’t safe for kids” said DJ’s mother. “KIDS” said DJ’s mother again to Courtney. “We get it, we get it. We aren’t Robert Loggia who makes a sentence with his name in each time he spells it” said Courtney.

DJ’s mother passed Chris’ to Heather and Lindsay. “The final Gilded Chris belongs to…” said DJ’s mother, eyeing Lindsay. Lindsay was about to eat the Gilded Chris and DJ’s mother threw her bag at Lindsay, making her drop the Gilded Chris. “You can die from eating gold and I don’t want to see you die” said DJ’s mother. “But you keep throwing that bag, so we may die either way, eh” said Ezekiel.

DJ’s mother growled. In the control panel, Chris said: “She’s going to bark again. Don’t bug her”. DJ’s mother angrily passed Courtney the final Gilded Chris of the night. “You voted me off, eh?!” said Ezekiel. “The secrets of a ballot” said DJ’s mother. “I voted you off Eskimo!” said Lindsay, who got up. DJ’s mother threw her bag at Lindsay, who fell to the ground again. “The secrets of a ballot, like I was saying before” said DJ’s mother.

Ezekiel sighed and walked down the Walk of Shame into the lame-o-sine. “Poopydoo’s mother… your kiss was better than meeting LeShawna’s bull. I mean… face or was it fiber. I mean… something I was addicted to something in season one that I totally forgot now, eh. Who cares. Call me!” said Ezekiel, as the lame-o-sine took off.

“Stalker…” said Courtney. “We head off into the final three and--“ said Chris in the control panel. “That’s my job. I am the host this episode. We head off into the final three or whatever and we’ll find out who will rock out… or something in the next Total Drama whatever you call it, Action?” said DJ’s mother.

"Bye Eskimo!" said Lindsay, in the confessional.

Chapter 24: The Aftermath: 4

“This is the fourth aftermath all!” said Chris. “I thought you said this was an elimination episode” said Heather. “Oh, well, I lied. Now, sit back, relax and watch the Aftermath” said Chris.

The Aftermath theme song plays. The Total Drama Action Aftermath theme played.

“A lot has happened since last time we met, huh?” said Beth. “Let’s start it off with Duncan” Beth continued. “Duncan didn’t want to do the fairy tale challenge and I wouldn’t blame him. I’d rather be stuck to a pole. Anyways, if he didn’t do the challenge, he’d be outta here and that’s what he didn’t do. He got eliminated, since he quit. However, our bully, Heather did take place in some backstabbing. She ripped parts of Cody’s costume with a fork. You are supposed to keep your costume the same with no damages” said Beth.

“Any thoughts? Let’s see our viewer fanmail!” said Beth. Beth read, “Do you think Heather deserves to be in the final four?” “In my opinion, no, because she is a big fat bully that is rude and mean. Poor Lindsay. Alone with Bully and Little Miss Bossy Pants” responded Beth. “EZEKIEL! EZEKIEL!” read Beth. “Let’s see what Ezekiel has to say about this!” Beth continued. “Where is he?” said Beth, looking through the cameras. “You think I should know” said Duncan. “Well, I guess Zeke has gone AWOL” said Beth.

“Now, here to discuss things is Cody!” said Beth. Cody walked out and winked at Beth. “Wait, did I forget my blue flip flops?” said Cody, looking at his barefeet. “I believe Cody walked out barefoot, how embarrassing?” said Beth. Everyone laughed. “Now, as Cody goes to get his foot, let’s review his time of the show!” said Beth, as Cody ran off. A clip was shown with Cody getting smooshed with a foot.

The girl with the purple hair in the stands said: “Cody deserves more than a foot, he deserves a whole episode, not just a second or two or three or just him being smooshed by a foot. He has tons of fans that like to watch him hug a stuffed bear and tie his shoes and be Edward Cullen in Twilight”. “I launch those people into space. Haha!” said Izzy. “Riiiight” said Beth. “Just going with what I gotta do” she continue. “Hey, did you say new poo?” said Owen. “Cause I got to go!” said Owen, running to the bathroom. “Don’t set any fires!” said Beth.

“Awww, but those were fun. Last time was awesome” said Izzy. “Speaking of last time, Ezekiel got caught in the mist of events and joined the competition. However, like I said, he’s AWOL right now and he’s a homeschool, so he probably didn’t get riding in cars so he jumped out. Anyways… he was eliminated in the last episode!” said Beth.

“Let’s move on!” said Justin. “Still upset over your elimination? I am too Justy-Wusty” said Beth. “Justy-Wusty?” said Justin. “Last but not least, we have Gwen, who got booted by a plan with Ezekiel and Heather. Let’s see Duncan!” said Beth. Duncan walked out of the Aftermath backstage. Everyone in the audience clapped. “Let’s see our special video guest!” said Beth, who turned on the television. A fangirl was seen, squealing. “omg, i wanna see dxg rite now i lyk dxg so much” the girl said.

“G? What does G stand for?” said Beth. “gwen! dxg ftw!” said the fangirl. “Well, do we have the footage for you?!” said Beth. An intern walked to her. “Well, it’s lost. Someone took it!” said Beth. Webby was seen moving oddly. “Webby, what are you doing?” said Beth. “omg i want bxw!” said the fangirl. “BxW?!” said Beth. “beth x webster!” said the fangirl. Webby fainted to the ground. Beth took a tape and said, “That’s where it is!” Beth put it on the other DVD player.

Duncan was seen kissing Gwen in the confessional, with Cody’s head in shock peeking in and peeking out. Duncan gasped, as everyone booed him. “Someone aka, Courtney is going to be hunting for you now” said Tyler. Trent gasped. “I can’t believe she’ll do that!” said Trent. “omg, that was so awsum. even awsumer than txc!” said the fangirl. “Trent X Cody?!” said Beth. Trent then fainted. “naw, trent x courtney!” said the fangirl. Beth paused the video cam. “Let’s move on before I barf” said Beth.

“Let’s move on to That’s Gonna Leave a Mark!” said Beth. “Joy” said Duncan, rolling his eyes. “Don’t work Duncan, it won’t be that bad” said Beth, nervously. Duncan growled. Beth put on the television to show Ezekiel running into paramedics. The next video was seen to show Ezekiel getting thrown out of the train twice and one time on a woopie cushion. The next video was shown to see Ezekiel barfing everywhere. “Enough with the Ezekiel videos, home girl!” said LeShawna. “Fine. Let’s see this!” said Beth.

A picture was shown with Beth hugging Eva and Eva punching her, giving her a black eye. “Why did that get in?” said Beth. Eva snickered. “We’ll be back… soon!” said Beth.

Later, Beth said: “We are back. We so far interviewed, well, talked to Duncan! And we saw never before seen clips of people and me getting hurt. Also, I helped DJ and his mother make cookies earlier on before this episode. Let’s show a never before… seen clip!” said Beth. A clip was shown with Beth’s glasses falling into the mixer and getting mixed. “Hey! Who edited that? My special good luck necklace fell in!” said Beth. DJ nodded. “Luck isn’t true, believe in yourself” said DJ’s mother. DJ nodded slowly in agreement.

“Well, let’s say hi to Cody!” said Beth. “OMG, EEEE, EEE, EEEEEE!” said the purple haired girl in the audience. “Was that you, Sadie?” said Katie. “No Sadie” said Sadie. “But I am Katie” said Katie. “You are? That means I must be Sadie!” laughed Sadie. “Haha, but that wasn’t me” said Katie. “Same” said Sadie. Eva snickered. “Excellent!” said Noah to himself. “All we need now is name tags!” said Noah, rolling his eyes. “OMG! I can make nametags!” said Katie. “Same here!” said Sadie. “I can make your’s!” said Katie. “I can make your’s too!” said Sadie. “I know how to spell your name backwards, upside and so many other cool ways. I love being BFFs, bestie!” said Katie. “OMG, same here!” said Sadie. “Can we get back to Cody?” said Beth, nervously.

“He’s mine!” said both Katie and Sadie. “No, he’s mine!” said the purple-haired girl, who walked on the Aftermath stage. “Security!” said Beth. “MINE!” said Sierra. “No!” said Sadie and Katie. “Girls, no need to fight over me. There’s enough of me to spread!” said Justin. “Hey! You are my boyfriend!” said Beth. “We want Cody” said Katie, Sadie and Sierra. Justin sighed and said: “Some girls never fall for the eye candy”.

Cody texted Beth, who said: “It looks like Cody doesn’t want to make an appearance”. Katie, Sadie and Sierra gasped. “But, but?!” said Sierra. “Security!” yelled Beth. Chef ran to the studio and threw Sierra to the seats. Owen walked back to the stage. “You shouldn’t go back in there” he said.

“Let’s see our final guest, Gwen!” said Beth. Everyone booed Gwen when she get out. “Hey everyone, I am Gwen and I am a nice person” said Gwen. Everyone continued to boo Gwen. “Harsh” said Duncan. Cody sighed, as he watched. Cody ran to the Aftermath stage as everyone booed Gwen. “MINE!” yelled Sierra, Sadie and Katie. They rushed toward Cody.

“STOP!” yelled Cody. The Aftermath studio suddenly became quiet. “You can’t just blame Gwen for just kissing Duncan. Gwen is nice toward Trent and Duncan is err… nice toward Courtney. Gwen’s a nice girl!” said Cody. “Thanks… Cody! Now, let’s just get this over with!” said Gwen.

“Let’s see this never before seen clip of Gwen!” said Beth. Beth turned the TV back on and Gwen was seen in the confessional, saying: “Duncan is so hot. That kiss before was awesome. He is a really rad dude, but I still like Trent and don’t want to hurt his feelings”. Trent growled. “I am sorry Trent, it won’t happen” said Gwen. “I’ve been through a lot and I don’t want to go through this” said Trent, really upset. “Me and Duncan are friends” said Gwen. “As if, that kiss is for a couple” said Trent. Suddenly, Ezekiel fell through the roof of the studio onto the ground.

“Well, sometimes this happens” said Cody. “What goes on, eh!” said Ezekiel. “Can someone interview Gwen perhaps?” said Cody. “We have a caller from Florida!” said Beth. “What goes on, eh!” said Ezekiel. Beth put on the television and the person said, “Huh… huh… hi Gwen!” Gwen moved a step away from the television.

“Ask Gwen a question” smiled Beth. “Who do you prefer more? Duncan or Trent?” said the person. “Trent, of course” said Gwen. Trent rolled his eyes. “Why did you kiss Duncan then?” The television lost connection. “What goes on, eh!” said Ezekiel. “Darn, I wanted to see what Gwen would say” said Geoff. "Yeah, I think I have to use the bathroom" said Gwen, running off. Cody gasped, as the audience continued to boo Gwen. “I am bored. Don’t make me angry!” said Eva, angrily. “Let’s just sign off on Total Drama Action Aftermath!” said Beth.

Chapter 25: Rock n’ Rule

“Last time on Total Drama Action, DJ’s mother took over as host and she was brutal on everyone. Right now, she’s in court. The tennis court with Chef, so Chef better do it her way. Ezekiel had a few kick outs and even a kiss from the train and Lindsay sung a terrible song. In the end, Lindsay got eliminated for noticing that if nobody was driving the train, it was being controlled. About time the dumb girl learned something, huh? Rock out in this episode of Total Drama ACTION!” said Chris.

(theme song plays in a rock and roll style)

The final three walked to studio twenty-three. “About time Heather looked at her PDA and saw my message” said Chris, upset. “I needed five showers, relax” said Heather. “Water waster” said Chris. “What’s today’s challenge?” said Courtney.

“Today’s challenge is the awesome rock n’ roll theme!” said Chris. “How is rock n’ roll awesome?” said Heather. “Isn’t that for guys?” said Lindsay. “It is, but you all voted them out and outbeat them this season. WAIT. Waaait… last season, we had three guys in the same situation like you, so it’s plenty even” said Chris.

“Now, on the stage!” said Chris. The cast walked up on stage. “I know how to sing!” said Lindsay. “I’m your smallest fan and--“ sung Lindsay, terribly. “That was terrible already” said Chris. “I didn’t even sing about the guy who was in a car chase with that person who sung the song!” said Lindsay.

“And I didn’t explain what you were doing in this challenge” said Chris. “It’s a rock n’ roll themed challenge, we know” said Courtney. “So, what rock n’ roll thing do I have planned” said Chris. In the confessional, Chris said: “Who’s the host now?!”

“Playing the right notes on the guitars like in Guitar Villain” said Courtney. “Lucky guess” said Chris. “And if you get hit, you’ll be electrocuted. You may never play the piano again” said Chris. “I don’t care” said Lindsay. “Or call your best friend either on the phone!” said Chris. “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” said Lindsay.

“And go!” said Chris. Courtney played hard. She played with her eyes closed and behind her back and said: “This is easy”. In the confessional, Courtney said: “I played guitar in the Type A Crazies, but I am not a Type A or an Izzy. The school thought of that name”. Lindsay missed five notes and got electructed. “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” said Lindsay, crying on the ground.

“You really thought you can’t talk of the phone again?” said Chris. Lindsay nodded. “You are alive, dimwit” said Heather. “I am alive?! I AM ALIVE!” said Lindsay. “Well, no duh” said Heather, trying to play perfect. “ARGH!” said Heather, angrily throwing the guitar on the floor, because she got distracted. “You got me distracted! ARGH!” said Heather.

“Relax Heather, there’s a giant chance you’ll get eliminated” said Chris. “We had like one elimination yesterday. Isn’t that enough?” said Heather. “Hmm… nah!” said Chris. In the confessional, Heather said: “I hate him so much”. In the confessional, Lindsay said: “I like him so much… as a friend”.

“I WIN! YES!” said Courtney. “Not really” said Chris. “You are bluffing” said Courtney. “The ridiculously large ant next to you won” said Lindsay. The ant ran away with a guitar on the ground. “Really?” said Courtney, facepalming herself. “No. You tried too hard” said Chris. “But rockstars always try hard” said Courtney. “You call this easy?” said Chris, dragging a TV over to let Courtney watch what she did while the challenge.

“So, you think Lindsay can do that?” said Chris. Lindsay waved. “Well, no” said Courtney. Chris pushed Courtney down. “Well, it looks like we have a winner!” said Chris. “Me?! I would like to--“ said Lindsay. “No, Heather!” said Chris. “What?!” said Courtney and Lindsay. “She didn’t try so hard after some time and just gave up. That’s what rockstars usually do” said Chris.

“Booyah!” said Heather, shaking to the left. Heather then dropped her PDA. “Ooooh, look at this” said Chris, stepping on it. “HEY!” said Heather. “You win an advantage in challenge two” said Chris. “Challenge two?” said Heather, Lindsay and Courtney. “Yes, a challenge two. I told you twice by now, you should understand” said Chris, upset.

The scene went to a paparazzi like part of the studio. “Welcome to Total Drama Paparazzi!” said Chris. “The paparazzi! YAY! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” said Lindsay. “No, it’s just cardboard” said Chris. “Awww” said Lindsay. “You are going to run to the finish line while taking pictures, getting clothing and getting to backstage. You can reject some stuff too!” said Chris. “Heather gets a five foot advantage” said Chris. “Five foot? That’s not an advantage” said Heather. “It is to me” Chris winked. “And the rest have to run out of the lame-o-sine!” said Chris. “We get eliminated?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” said Lindsay. “Stop with the yelling, PLEASE!” said Chris, angrily.

“Heather, go first!” said Chris. Heather fell into the woman with a camera, but took three shirts from a man. She then beats up the next three people, including the man waiting backstage. “Pass the tape” said Chris. An intern passed Chris tape and Chris taped the cardboard people together so they wouldn’t fall apart.

“Who’s next?” said Chris. “Lindsay will go” said Courtney. “Okay!” said the loony Lindsay. Lindsay hugged the cardboard man and then took five hand outs and gave it to the cardboard crowd. She posed for a picture and rejected dark red lipstick. “Hurry up already” said Courtney. “Do you want me to sign your head too?!” said Lindsay. “No” said Courtney. “Okay!” said Lindsay, taking all the shirts and kissing the guy by the backstage. She ran in and waved to Heather.

“Next” said Chris. Courtney ran past everyone but took black lipstick. “Hmmm… really interesting” said Chris, as Courtney walked backstage. “I have to say by looking at these pictures, Lindsay was the only one who posed. Heather fell onto the woman and Courtney skipped her” said Chris, reviewing the pictures. “But what about the lipstick?” said Courtney. “I didn’t say if you got lipstick, you win. I picked something random and that was the photo” said Chris.

“Lindsay wins an advantage in the next challenge. Now, isn’t that great?!” said Chris. “No” said both Courtney and Heather. “Yes” said Lindsay. “Well, next challenge is the one for immunity” said Chris. “So, we ARE having an elimination episode, huh?” said Heather. “I wouldn’t say that…” said Chris.

“We had longer elimination streaks before if you did not know Heather” said Sierra. “Who the heck are you?” said Heather. Sierra ran off. “Stalker alert!” said Chris. “Anyways, come with me to the final part of this studio” said Chris.

The cast walked with Chris to a bedroom. “Movie stars and rock stars always destroy, blow up, go nuts and mess up bedrooms and that’s what you are going to do” said Chris. “Now, Lindsay will get 10 seconds to destroy stuff at the end, but for now, everyone go!” said Chris, backing away from everyone. In the one minute that was needed to destroy the whole bedroom, Heather pushed Lindsay into a lamp and kicked all walls. Courtney threw pillows to the ground and Lindsay stepped on them. Lindsay bit a mat up, as Courtney and Heather threw a bed upside down.

In the confessional, Chris said: “I am happy that Izzy wasn’t here for this. She would’ve set bombs everywhere and we would’ve needed a new studio and stuff”.

“Woah, you guys are seriously nuts” said Chris. “I have to say though that Heather wins immunity, because she threw Lindsay around, knocked down walls, broke a lamp and flipped a bed upside down” said Chris. “What about me? I flipped a bed, ripped pillows and pushed Lindsay too!” said Courtney. “But Heather did a lot more damage” said Chris. “What about my ten seconds?” said Lindsay. The time went by fast and only a clock fell down. “See, Heather wins immunity!” said Chris. “Yaay! Hannah, can you give it to me?” said Lindsay.

“In your face losers. I am going to the final two and nothing is stopping me!” said Heather. “What makes you so sure that we are eliminating someone tonight? Your reward is immunity and we are having an elimination next time on Total Drama Action!” said Chris.

Chapter 26: Top Dog

“Last time on Total Drama Action, we had a cool rock and role challenge, as Heather dominated in the last part of the challenge. Lindsay also did well in the second part of the challenge, but this was a reward challenge. This next episode will show you who will be in the final two!” said Chris.

The theme song plays.

The cast was seen in the Mess Hall. “Morning final three!” said Chris. “Hey Chris!” said Lindsay. “I know you are going to win…” said Chris. “Thanks” blushed Lindsay. “…Is what I would say if you won!” said Chris. Courtney rolled her eyes. “Let’s just get this over with!” said Courtney. “Ruin the fun, anyways, today is animal buddy day. Yay” said Chris. “That’s not even a movie” said Heather and Courtney at the same time. “Hey. I get to say what I want” said Heather. Heather and Courtney both growled. “What’s with them?” said Chris. “Same old story” said Lindsay.

“But there is no animal buddy movie!” said Courtney. “Well, then you guys are going to be the first ones to be in one” said Chris. “What about Kitty Gablore?!” said Lindsay. “I don’t care, first one in the history of the show!” said Chris. “But, PJ is always near animals!” said Lindsay. The scene shows DJ next to bunnies, rats and snakes. “Whatever, challenge!” said Chris. “What about the time we ran like nuts to hunt animals” said Courtney. “This season, let me just finish this so I won’t go nuts!” said Chris.

“Squirrels? Where?!” said Lindsay. “Did I say there were any squirrels?!” said Chris. Chef nodded and Chris angrily grinned at him. Chef slipped slowly to the ground. “Anyways, today’s challenge is the shut up… don’t want any comments about it” said Chris. “I never knew that was a movie!” said Lindsay. “I said shut up and don’t comment on that. Anyways, today’s movie is the animal buddy movie even if there is no animal buddy movie, but I am pretty sure there is. Anyways, you three get to pick an animal that you want to work with in this episode. It’s a sudden death challenge. So whoever gets the lowest rank gets eliminated” said Chris.

“Wait, so the pet will die?!” said Lindsay. “The winner’s pet will!” said Chris. “How does that have to go into buddy then?” said Courtney. “Well, you aren’t killing the animal, because Chef is probably” said Chris, staring at the Chef on the ground. “Anyways, pick one of three pets!” said Chris. Chef removed the tarf to show a bear, a dog and a shark.

“Heather, since you won yesterday’s challenge, you get to pick which animal you are going to be buddies with!” said Chris. “Buddies?! These are buddies?!” said Heather. The dog wagged its tail. “I pick… the dog!” said Heather. Chef walked the dog to Heather. “Okay, Lindsay? Who do you pick?!” said Chris. “Joy” said Courtney, rolling her eyes. “’BOTH!” said Lindsay. “You can pick one” said Chris. “The bear fits Courtney more, but I want the bear. But Courtney is mean as a bear. I mean, she uses paper towels in the bathroom like those bears” said Lindsay. “Don’t we all?” said Courtney. “Omar didn’t do it and Izzy peed in the pool!” said Lindsay. “It looks like we found ourselves a stalker” said Heather. “ME! ME!” said Lindsay. “Anyways, I pick… the bear!” said Lindsay. “D’OH!” said Courtney.

“Okay, you have an hour to train your pets and show me some tricks and stuff. Impress me!” said Chris. “I do like exploding donuts” said Chef. “Shut up, don’t tell them or else you won’t co-host this challenge with me” said Chris, facepalming himself.

Heather ran to the craft services tent and found donuts. “Now, where can I find crazy girl?!” said Heather. In the confessional, Chris said: “They better stop referencing Izzy or talk about her. This isn’t Total Drama Reference… is it?” Heather slapped her dog, which barked. “Shut up. I need you to find crazy girl!” said Heather. The dog smelled the ground. “TODAY!” said Heather. The dog begun to use the bathroom on Heather’s shoes. “ARGH! Stupid dog” said Heather, slapping the dog. The dog howled. “Shut up” said Heather. In the confessional, Heather said: “I should’ve tried the bear”.

Meanwhile, Lindsay said: “Do you want me to paint your skin pink or red?” The bear nodded his head no. “Blue?” said Lindsay. The bear growled. “Blue it is” cheered Lindsay. In the confessional, Lindsay said: “For the record, I am not a fan of that movie Signature”. The bear growled again and took the blue paint and dipped it over Lindsay’s head. “Mr. Bear” said Lindsay, walking into walls over and over again, until she fell down the stairs. “Ouch” said Chris, watching at the judge panel.

“I hate you and you hate me, we are not as tight as your stupid family. But if you win this challenge for me and I will give you tons of food” sung Courtney. The shark smiled. “Okay, so I am really nice” said Courtney. The shark nodded. “Now act like me” said Courtney. The shark bit Courtney. “OW!” said Courtney. “I am not like that” said Courtney.

The shark nodded. “Argh, I am trying to win here!” said Courtney. The scene cut back to Heather and the dog. “Okay, fetch me… my purse!” said Heather. The dog found lipgloss. “A purse!” said Heather. The dog ran off and dragged Ezekiel over. “Not him” said Heather. The dog threw Ezekiel into a garbage can. The scene then cut to Lindsay. “Okay, so now we can go shopping!” said Lindsay. Lindsay found a bag and threw the bag over the bear.

“Ten minutes!” said Chris, over the loudspeaker. “We need to win this. Okay, if you be like me, I’ll feed you… Harold’s ants!” said Courtney. The shark got onto the ground of the water and begun to mimic Courtney and what she did. “No, no, no. You got to yell louder. You need to speak and make a deal. YOU NEED TO…” said Courtney, as the shark continued to mimic her. “This is what I like” smiled Courtney.

“I don’t want Cleopatra! I don’t want the queen of England. I don’t want Lindsay’s brain. I want my purse!” said Heather. The dog bit Heather. “I am never going to the final two like that!” said Heather. The dog kicked dirt on Heather and ran away. “Perfect. I need to piss the dog off to make it like me!” said Heather.

The scene went back to Lindsay. “What mall do you want to go to?!” said Lindsay, in between a burned down studio and the super hero studio. The bear pointed at the burned down studio. “Cool!” said Lindsay. Lindsay went in and found pieces of burned cardboard. “How much money is this?” said Lindsay. The confused bear ate the cardboard. “Wait, this is the supermarket?” said Lindsay. The confused bear took off its bag and ate it.

“I hope nobody is going to be a giant fail in this judgement!” said Chris. Courtney sighed. The shark gasped. “Okay sharkie. We have like five minutes! Let’s practice!” said Courtney. The shark nodded no. “We are practicing” said Courtney. The shark nodded no once again. “Well, you’re useless” said Courtney. The shark and its water begun to roll down a hill. “COME BACK HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” screamed Courtney, running after the shark. Chris watched the shark and Courtney pass by the hill. “Haha, suckers” said Chris. “Four more minutes” smiled Chris.

The scene went back to Lindsay and the bear. “It’s Hannah’s turn!” said Lindsay. The bear, who was now in studio sixteen with Lindsay, kept bumping into walls, including one with a bomb back and forth. “Oooh, flashing lights!” said Lindsay, as the clock slowly went down to zero starting from fifty-eight. “I love clocks! Let’s buy it!” said Lindsay. The bear took the bomb from the wall that was already in forty-nine in the countdown. “So, it’s an alarm thingie?!” said Lindsay.

The bear dropped the bomb, noticing it was a bomb and not an alarm. Lindsay ran out of the studio with the bear, as the watch quickly reached ten. “Wait, did we forget to buy Silly Bands?!” said Lindsay. The bear ran with Lindsay, as the studio exploded.

Courtney was still chasing after the shark, as it went into water. The shark bit the glass container and swam away. “We had a deal. WE HAD A DEEAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLL!” screamed Courtney. “Ouch” said Chris. “Time is up all!” said Chris, with his megaphone. Lindsay and the bear walked to Chris the first with bags of stuff. “Okay…” said Chris. Heather walked with a purse and the dog nowhere to be seen. “What happened to you?!” said Chris. “The dog… is in the purse” said Heather. The dog peaked out and beat its head to Heather’s face, as Heather put the dog back to the purse, headfirst.

“Courtney, you have to come back up!” said Chris with his megaphone. Courtney, however was swimming already with all of her clothes on after the shark. Courtney swimmed into the deep and deadly parts of the water. Interns rushed down to the water and grabbed a plane. Three interns jumped out and dragged Courtney to the seashore. The seven interns remaining on the plane, landed the plane and ran to Courtney. “I DO NOT CONCIDE! I DO NOT CONCIDE!” she said, as she got dragged off the seashore by all ten interns. “I didn’t know we had that many” said Chris, staring at Chef. “And I didn’t know Courtney hides custard boxes in her butt!” said Chef. “How do you know that?” said Chris. “Wikipedia…” said Chef, slowly. “Riiight” said Chris.

Courtney tried to hold onto rocks, bushes and treestumps, heading up the hill with the interns. After twenty-nine minutes of waiting, Courtney got up to the hill by interns with no shark. The interns walked away. “Now, whoever runs down the hill again gets eliminated” said Chris, as Courtney was about to book it and run down the hill. “Can we just boot type-c off?” said Chef. Chris looked at Chef confused and Courtney glared at Chef. “Crazy” said Chef. “It’s a joke” he continued. “Riiight” Chris said again. “Anyways, to save drama for the end, Courtney will go last and Lindsay will go first” said Chris.

Lindsay walked up with her bear. “Are you Tyler?” said Lindsay at the bear. The bear patted Chris. “Hi Tyler!” said Lindsay, to Chris. The bear reached for its bag and grabbed out a pink t-shirt. “Hey! I have one too! I love that kind!” said Lindsay. The bear wagged it’s tail and smiled at Lindsay. The bear then pointed at its pink fur and Lindsay said: “I love blue too!” “Eight points” said Chris and Chef at the same time.

“YAY! Final two!” said Lindsay, giving a bear a high-five, before it growled. “Oh yeah… I need to give it a big hug!” said Lindsay, hugging a bear. “Save it for later… stupid” said Heather. “That was cold…” said Chris. “Your mom is cold” said Heather. “You don’t even know my mom” said Chris. In the confessional, Heather said: “Remember that stalker girl that everyone was talking about? That stole Lindsay’s underwear, hacked onto Gwen’s blog and looked at my blog? And liked Cody. She sent me a text message somehow and told me that Chris had a mom. I am not interested, but I’ll use it for blackmail for now on!”

“Well, here’s my dog!” said Heather. The dog perfectly awkwardly smiled at Chris. “Who knew animals had feelings?” said Chris. Heather rolled her eyes. “You stupid dog. Do something” said Heather. The dog kicked dust at Heather’s shoes. “HEY! These were three hundred dollars!” said Heather. Heather kicked dust at the dog and they continued to kick dust at each other over and over again. “Stop it!” said Heather, angrily. The dog continued. “ARGH!” said Heather. “Hmmm… 7.5!” said Chris. “How can I get ranked less than LINDSAY?!” said Heather. “Because…” said Chris. “LINDSAY” said Heather again. “Let me…” said Chris. “LINDSAY!” repeated Heather. “Nevermind, you have a seven” said Chris. “ARGH!” said Heather. “You were supposed to make me have a perfect ten!” said Heather to the dog.

Heather threw the dog to the water, next to Ezekiel and the shark. “Owned” said Chef. “I told you to stop watching late night comedies!” said Chris, angrily to Chef. “So it’s certain that Lindsay is in the final two!” said Chris. “YAY! Me and Tyler are in the final two!” said Lindsay. “Yes, your imaginary girlfriend” said Heather, rolling her eyes. “This next performance will prove if Heather will be in the final two and if Courtney will” said Chris. “I don’t have my pet” said Courtney. “Boo hoo” said Chris. “So, I am in the final two with Lindsay?” smiled Heather. In the confessional, Courtney: “Where did I screw up?”

“Lindsay, you are in the final two” said Chris. “You said that” said Heather. Courtney and Heather stared at each other, as the dog and shark high-fived each other underwater. “Courtney…” said Chris. “YES!” said Courtney. “Boo to you cow” said Heather, walking to the lame-o-sine. “You apparently lost your shark!” said Chris. Heather walked back to Chris fastly. “So, you get a ten!” said Chris. “What?!” said Heather. “Eat dust!” said Courtney. “No, in your dreams. You don’t get a ten. No pet, nothing higher than one. Courtney, you have been eliminated” said Chris. “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” screamed Courtney. Duncan fell off the stage in the Aftermath studio suddenly from that large yell.

The ten interns that dragged Courtney up the hill took Courtney to the lame-o-sine, by dragging her. “YOU CHEATED! ALL OF YOU!” said Courtney. An intern shut the door, as the lame-o-sine took off. “I feel bad for the driver” said Lindsay. In the confessional, Heather said: “Being in the final two with Lindsay is just simple for me. I am so winning. Lindsay can’t stand a chance against me. She’s so dumb that she’ll probably ask everyone who’s Tyler so much that she’ll forget the challenge and or forget what she’s doing. Stupid Lindsay. Wonder how she even got here”. In the confessional, Lindsay said: “YAY! I am in the final three with mean Hannah and Tyler! Best couple ever!” In the confessional, Chef said: “Girl has issues, a lot of them”.

“Join us next time to see what will happen to Lindsay and Heather. Who will win and take home the million dollars or whatever I promised in the beginning of the season in Total Drama ACTION!” said Chris.

Chapter 27: The Aftermath: 5

“It’s been forever. Forever. No really, it’s so long that LeShawna’s butt is almost mold” said Chris. “Anyways, it’s been a long season. And we’ve eliminated all but two in Total Drama Action” Chris continued. “Long recaps for the win” said Chef in the background. “I told you to set the trailers on fire! Not talk in the background” said Chris. “Sorry” said Chef. “Anyways, we are going to watch who is going to win Total Drama ACTION!” said Chris.

Theme song plays.

A fire alarm went off. “EEEEEEEE! Is that the alarm that Tyler has arrived?” said Lindsay. “It’s the alarm that you leave the trailers since there’s a fire on your bed!” said Heather, running out. “Oh yeah!” said Lindsay, running out with Heather. “God, why couldn’t you have died in there?” said Heather. “Well, we didn’t want you to win unfairly!” said Chris. “Both of you are going into the lame-o-sine!” said Chris. “Wait, I worked my butt off for twenty what? one episodes and I get eliminated?” said Heather. “YAY!” said Lindsay. Chef shoved Lindsay and Heather into the lame-o-sine. The driver drove the lame-o-sine perfect to studio twenty-seven. “You know we could’ve walked there?” said Heather. Heather and Lindsay walked into the studio. “OMG! TYLER!” said Lindsay, pointing to the purple haired stalker girl. “Hey Lindsay” said the girl. “Let’s make out!” said Lindsay. Heather sighed. “Bad girlfriend, huh Tyler?!” said Beth. Tyler nodded slowly. “Wait, he’s Tyler?!” said Lindsay, pointing to Webby, still on the floor from the other aftermath. “No” said everyone. “Awesome!” said Lindsay, sitting next to Beth. “Hey Beth. I can’t believe Heather took me to the final three and not you. She is so evil!” said Lindsay.

“You know that was last season, Lindsay?” said Beth. “I merged them together” said Lindsay. “Interesting, anyways, it looks like Chris and Chef are going to vacation and left me a note” said Beth. Chris read the letter as a voiceover saying: “Dear whoever takes care of the Aftermath shows, you are not a dear, unless you are an Emily, but some of us spaz out because they know she has no confirmed name. Let me confirm it to you that her name is Emily and don’t yell at me for telling you. I just old you. Anyways, it’s the final two and only Lindsay wouldn’t know that. No, seriously. Only she wouldn’t know that. Today is a jury vote and only competitors from season two can vote. And no Eva, don’t flip out and throw tables at LeShawna. And LeShawna, don’t eat the fiber in the confessional. Anyways, I am off to Sunset Beach with Chef and Billy the intern. And also don’t spaz because I told you his name is Billy. Like Emily, I was chosen to tell you to say that. Anyways, this letter is long and follow all directions. Don’t break anything. And don’t set a fire Izzy. Now, Chef has a message”. Chef took over as the voice over, saying: “Dear dogs and cats, kiss my butt!”

“Okay, that was helpful. Time for a never before seen clip of Chris!” said Beth. Beth put on the tape showing Chris starting fires in the Mess Hall while season one auditions. The next clip was seen with Chris singing Love Is My Drug in the shower. At the airport, Chris was trying to have a moment with Emily and Emily begun to laugh at these clips. “I told them to not watch any videos about rubber ducks!” said Chris, watching Chef eating a duck and DJ crying. “Well, we hope that helps you find out who Chris McLean really is. Oh yes, one more clip says the intern!” said Beth. The clip shows Chris have Bieber Fever and staring in the Key of Awesome parody in jail from the fever. Everyone laughed, but Lindsay and Eva. “I don’t get it” said Lindsay. “That kid is a girl and a sissie. I am more popular than her” said Eva.

At the airport, Chef laughed and Chris said: “This vacation is cancelled!” Chef gasped. Chris threw Chef into the lame-o-sine and said: “We are driving back to the Aftermath studio and going to take over! And my name isn’t Rod Stewart!” Suddenly, the driver speeded down to the studio, and hit a guy with red skin. “Was that Cherry?” said Chef. The lame-o-sine stopped in Camp Wawanakwa and took off, once Chris and Chef walked out. “WHAT IS THE SAME OF CAMP WAWNAKWA AND THE FILM LOT?!” said Chris, really ticked off.

“Anyways, I think its time to vote on who should win. But first, lets have the final two discuss what they’ll do with the money!” said Beth. “I’ll go first, since I am more deserving” said Heather. Gwen rolled her eyes. “You guys may know me for helping all of you to be in this game longer. For example, Webby, if it wasn’t for me, you would have lost for joining my alliance and I helped Beth get a bit farther in season one for joining my alliance. I also gave Owen food and also helped Lindsay get this far. I am really nice and don’t do anything bad. And if I win, I won’t do an RCMP report to find Tyler, unlike OTHER people” said Heather, staring at Lindsay. “I will totally do that!” said Lindsay. “Interesting…” said Beth. “I am totally voting for you Heather” said Webby, on the floor. Lindsay gasped.

“Lindsay, your turn!” said Beth. “I would like to thank Omar, Bella, Chip, Harry Potter, Shawndra, Eskimo, Dunkin, Corny, Cheffie-Poo, John, James, Todd and Tyson for helping me. Hannah is a meanie also. And I would look for Tyler when I win the money. Vote for Lindsay. I will also use my money for my pet bear!” said Lindsay. Tyler facepalmed herself as Heather laughed. “You call THAT a speech” said Heather. “Heather is SOOOO nice” said Gwen. “If you win that money, I am ripping it all in half and stuffing it down your face” said LeShawna.

“And can I say one more thing?!” said Lindsay. “Sure” said Beth. “If I win, I will try to find hunters to hunt down the people scarier than Hannah, Greta and Lebutta combined!” said Lindsay. “LeShawna” facepalmed LeShawna. “SEE! Lindsay is trying to hurt people!” said Heather. “Don’t vote for a crook!” said Heather. “I didn’t steal the cookies from the cookie jar yesterday night!” said Lindsay, angrily.

“CAT FIGHT!” screamed Harold. “You enjoy those?” said LeShawna. “Not as much as I enjoy you” winked Harold. “Why are you hitting on me right noww?” said LeShawna. “LESHAWNA’S BUTT IS MINE, EH!” said Ezekiel. “Two nerds like me, why couldn’t Chad like me?” said LeShawna.

“I think it is time to vote for the winner!” said Beth. “Where do we vote?!” said Izzy. “In the confessional over there” said Beth, pointing in a blue confessional. “Sure!” said Courtney. “Until I return from my unfair elimination” said Courtney. “Relax darling, you are working too hard on yourself. You did great” said Duncan. “And Trent tells me you kissed Gwen” said Courtney. “FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!” said Harold. Duncan punched Harold and sat down.

“Okay! I’ll go first I guess” said Beth. Beth walked in and said: “I vote for Lindsay, Heather is really mean. Also, how well did I do as a host?” Next, Justin walked in and said: “I am not giving up my money to someone who will waste it on a bear and not people like me. I’d give it to someone who actually knows what they are doing and aren’t annoying, especially with their squealing”. DJ then walked in and said: “I like both of them. But I vote for… Lindsay. She’s nicer than Heather. Sorry, Heather”. Owen followed and said: “I vote for Lindsay. Heather is mean and I heard she insulted Izzy the other day. Who would do such a thing?”

Justin whispered to Sadie, “good luck with your vote” and winked at her. “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” said Sadie. In the potty, Sadie said: “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” “EEE! EEE! EEEK!” Sadie kept yelling. “Not again” said Beth. “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” said Sadie, rolling off the stage. “SADIE!” yelled Katie, jumping ontop of Sadie. They both smiled. “Why do I bother?” sighed Justin. Webby walked in and said: “I vote for Lindsay, I lied. Teehee. I really do need more character!” Trent then walked in and said: “I vote Lindsay to win, she’s much more deserving than Heather”. Tyler walked in and said, “Lindsay of course, I am her girlfriend and Heather should have been eliminated first”.

Izzy said: “IZZY IS WINNING. BOOM BOOM! YEAH!” Duncan walked in and said: “Well, I hate both Lindsay and Heather, but at least one won’t waste the money and sing songs about pink clouds”. Next, Cody walked in and said: “Lindsay, both are ladies, but I am going with Lindsay”. Next, Gwen said: “I vote Lindsay to win, Heather is not deserving at all. And I can rant on and on about how I don’t like her”. Ezekiel then walked in and said: “Heather, eh. She’s cooler than Lindsay”. Finally, Courtney walked in and gets muted by the camera crew. She is shown to be screaming. LeShawna then walked in and ate the fiber on the table and then said: “This is a potty, AGAIN?!”

“Okay” smiled Beth. “The votes are in” she continued. Suddenly, the backstage doors opened with Chris McLean and Chef Hatchet soaked and really upset. “Hey! Chris and Chef are here!” said Beth. Everyone clapped. Chris facepalmed Beth away from the seat. “This is going to be my job for now on, alright?!” said Chris, ticked off. “Aren’t you on vacation?” said Trent. “His fault” said Chef, pointing at Chris. “Anyways… where are you guys in this episode anyways?!” said Chris. “The voting part” said both Lindsay and Ezekiel. “Okay. I guess Ezekiel can go first!” said Chris.

Ezekiel once again walked in and said: “This is really confusing, eh”. “We did that already” said LeShawna. “Okay” said Chris. “Thanks for telling me” said Chris. “No prob” said LeShawna. Harold winked at LeShawna and LeShawna sighed. “Okay guys. Time for the results!” said Chris.

“One vote for Lindsay” said Chris. “Another vote for Lindsay” Chris continued. “YAY MEEEE!” said Lindsay. “A mute…” said Chris. Courtney was about to say something else, but then was muted once again. “And a vote for Izzy” said Chris. “Beth, did you tell them that they can only vote for Lindsay and Courtney?” said Chris. “No” said Beth. “Argh” said Chris. “A vote for Heather” said Chris. Heather grinned. “Finally, you loons really need to vote better” said Heather. “A vote for Lindsay and yet another vote for Lindsay” said Chris. “YAY!!!!!” said Lindsay. “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” screamed Katie and Sadie, still on the ground. “What happened there?” said Chris. “Same old story” said Justin.

“Okay, we also have an… take it from here Sadie” said Chris. “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” said Sadie. “What can be that whole word? Elegant Elephants Eating Eggs…” said Ezekiel. “So, it’s four votes Lindsay and one vote Heather” said Chris. “Another vote Lindsay and another vote Heather” said Chris. “If Lindsay gets majority of the remaining votes, she’ll win season two!” said Chris. “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” screamed Lindsay. “Two more votes for Lindsay” said Chris. “Lindsay has seven votes and Heather has two” said Chris. “WHAT?!” growled Heather. “A point for Heather” said Chris. “YES!” said Heather. “And the winner is… LINDSAY!” said Chris. “YAY!” said Lindsay. “Fricking yes!” said LeShawna.

A group of people including Owen, Beth, LeShawna, Gwen, Webby and Tyler picked up Lindsay to celebrate her win. “And this ends a fantastic season two, as we say goodbye to our winner, Lindsay! Our runner up, who should’ve been eliminated first, Heather! And everyone else! Until my new show debuts, this is Chris McLean signing off for Total Drama Action!” said Chris.

Chapter 28: Celebrity Manhunt’s Extra-Special Total Drama Action Reunion Show

“LIMOS!” said Blaineley. “Tuxedos!” said Josh. “Celebrity Manhunt’s Extra-Special Total Drama Action Reunion Show!” said Blaineley and Josh.

The theme song plays.

“Well, well, well. Last time on Total Drama Action, Lindsay and Heather were competition to win the entire show and Lindsay won with the majority of the votes. Harshness for Heather. Working so hard and she gets to suck some lemons. She’s such a soar loser” said Blaineley. “Well, let’s see what happened with her and Gwen since the competition has ended!” said Josh. The scene turned to Heather making a vlog saying: “Gwen used to cry in the confessional when I did something bad to her, like voting off her boyfriend, Duncan”. The scene then turned to Gwen making a response vlog saying: “I didn’t make out with Owen’s butt in the sleep-a-thon”. The scene then cut back to Heather making a response vlog to the response vlog by Gwen wearing a Gwen costume: “Welcome to the weirdo Gwen show and I am Gwen. I am really weird and have blue skin. I love Duncan and he’s mine Courtney, but I can’t fight for my life”. The scene cut back to Gwen making a response vlog to the response vlog by Heather to the response vlog of her’s, saying: “I am coming after you Heather!” “I am sooooo scared” said Heather, rolling her eyes. “Celebrity Manhunt reports that Gwen did hunt Heather down, by calling Heather’s little cousin and Heather got knocked out by a pan” said Blaineley. “Harsh. CAT FIGHT!” said Josh.

“Yes, we know you love cat fights, but this episode isn’t about you, is it?” said Blaineley. “Meow” winked Josh. “Riiight, Josh had this old clip a few months ago with Gwen and Heather” said Blaineley. “Let’s watch” said Josh. Blaineley put on the clip. “And what do you think of Gwen, Heather?” said Josh. “I think Gwen is a weird goth girl that needs go to LeShawna for fashion ideas. LESHAWNA” said Heather. “She’s more cuter than you” said Gwen. “You can’t be the judge of that!” said Heather. “Yes, I can!” said Gwen. Heather smacked Gwen, as they begun a fight. “CAT FIGHT! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” said Josh. Watching this clip, Blaineley said: “You are too girly”. “Let’s move on to see what Owen has done after the show!” said Josh. “I agree” said Blaineley, putting on the clip.

The clip shows Owen making food. “First, you need to put all the dough, cheese and sauce in the oven!” said Owen. Owen put the pizza in the oven and soon to become impatient. “So, read any good movies as of late?!” said Owen. “I mean, watch any good books as of late?!” said Owen. Owen begun to grow sad. “PIZZA!” cried Owen, opening the oven and eating the pizza. “And that’s all for this week on… Owen’s Food Show” sniffled Owen. As the show grew to the black screen close, Owen said: “I missed you pizza”. “He didn’t explain when to take the pizza out of the oven” said Josh. “Maybe when you want to eat it?” said Blaineley. “But I know how to make pizza” said Josh, pointing at himself. “Now, let’s see what happened to Izzy, since the show ended!” said Blaineley.

Pictures were shown on the floor of the studio with Izzy in several moves including Queen Kong, Izzy of the Jungle, Attack of the 50 Foot Psycho, Kill Izzy and The Sound of Izzy. “Izzy has became a popular movie star since the show has ended!” said Blaineley. “Yeah, but she freaked out on set last week!” said Josh. “Let’s watch!” said Blaineley. The cameraman of Celebrity Manhunt walked on the set when Izzy was performing. Izzy suddenly went ballistic. “WHY ARE YOU HERE?! YOU AREN’T ON THIS SHOW!” said Izzy. “I am just filming for Celebrity Mahunt!” said the cameraman. “Well, tell those people this. I DON’T WANT ANYONE ON THE FRICKING STAGE WHEN I FRICKING WORK. I DON’T WANT ANYONE GIVING ME LUNCH AND GIVING IT TO ME WHEN I FRICKING WORK. DO YOU GOT THAT?!” said Izzy. “Yes, all filmed!” said the cameraman. “This is what I think of your camera!” said Izzy, taking the camera and throwing it on the floor. The cameraman ran away crying. “Haha, just kidding. Lunch on me?” said Izzy. “Yumm… lunch” said Owen, somewhere offscreen.

“And right after this, Izzy got fired” said Blaineley. “Her face was cute when she went ballistic though” said Josh. “Yes, and that would’ve made a fantastic movie!” said Blaineley. “At least we know who will star in that” winked Josh. “Oh yes, DJ’s mother. Let’s see what has happened to her since her last on-screen appearance” said Blaineley. Josh then explained: “She’s right now a bus driver and now has a bus. She drives DJ around in it and doesn’t want him to be in the public in grab for anyone, but she also cooled down and also got wild”. “Yes, she did in something we never expected. She attended a pool party and actually went nude by accident” said Blaineley. Josh then said, “That’s new”. “Mhm” said Blaineley. “Let’s move on to our season two winner!” continued Blaineley. “HEATHER!” said Josh. “No, Lindsay” said Blaineley. “I forgot to record that episode on VCR” said Josh. “It’s fine” said Blaineley.

“Well, she and Beth went to Paris for a bit and went to the museum with the Mona Lisa!” said Josh. “And is that bad? No” said Blaineley. “Until she begun to take pictures!” said Josh. “So there was Beth trying to not get cut-off in the camera, while Lindsay took pictures and Lindsay wanted Beth to move back. Beth moved back and fell ontop of the Mona Lisa. There was a huge mark” said Blaineley. “A huge one and Lindsay wanted to change the colors of it and rub it!” said Josh. “So Lindsay licked her pointer finger and rubbed it and smushed it!” said Blaineley. “A security officer then ran to Lindsay and Beth, saying: ‘Oh no, this isn’t good. Okay, out out out out out!’” said Josh. “And then Lindsay got confused thinking he was the paramedic in a few episodes this season” said Blaineley. “We have that scene on tape!” said Josh, as Blaineley put in the tape. Lindsay said: “Wait, you are that paramedic guy!” The security officer said: “Well, I graduated as one, but switched to the security officer”. Lindsay said: “You grew so old in just weeks and you don’t think I am a man!” The security officer said: “Okay weirdo girl and cow-ish girl, outta here. You learned something about my past”. “Hey! I am not a cow!” said Beth. “Moo” said Lindsay. The security officer called the police, who came to the scene and arrested Lindsay and Beth. Pictures were seen of their mugshots. Lindsay’s mugshot said: “WERESTYLER” and Beth’s mugshot said: “2948568”. Lindsay looked confused in the two pictures taken of her and her mugshot and Beth looked upset in the two pictures taken of her and her mugshot.

“However, they got bailed out of jail using half of Lindsay’s million dollars” said Blaineley. “Tough luck for all the voters for Lindsay” said Josh. “Yep, all that money, well most of it in the hands of the Paris jail” said Blaineley. “In response to this, Heather has joined us to discuss!” said Josh. Heather walked in and sat next to Blaineley. “I am not sitting next to him. He was squealing the entire time I beat Gwen up” said Heather, pointing at Josh. “Well, that’s what Heather has to say! She talks about squealing and Josh instead of Lindsay and the money! Thanks for your time Heather!” said Blaineley, pushing Heather to a camera. “Ouch” said Josh. “Moving on to a hit band!” said Josh. “I love them!” said Blaineley. “THE DRAMA BROTHERS!” said Josh. “We have their song on this iPod!” said Josh. “Because Blaineley had to download it!” said Josh, rolling his eyes. “What?! Let’s listen to… When I Fly!” said Blaineley.

Harold: When I fly…
Cody: I feel like a butterfly.
Justin: No sexier than I.
Trent: But I wonder… will we ever die if we get to fly.
Harold: OH MY!

“I just love Justin!” said Blaineley. “And they are still making more songs, like Baby and Harold Fever” said Josh. “I feel sick already” said Blaineley. “Why not we move on to LeShawna?” said Josh. “Sure!” said Blaineley. “Ever since LeShawna left, she’s been in several game shows like Square of Misfourtune, You Are In Jeopardy and Are You Smarter Than A Homeschool? Here’s a montage on what she did in shows like that!” The montage was shown, with LeShawna shaking her butt, screaming, driving a car, crasing it into a studio and throwing tables at hosts. “Well, she got a contract for her own show, Builders and Breakers, but she rejected it” said Josh. “Too bad for LeShwna” said Blaineley. “Ezekiel might have been getting rid of forever” said Josh. “But he might be a co-host or intern or cameraman or contestant” said Blaineley. “You think a homeschool kid knows where a studio is?” said Josh. “Well, he knows how to count to five” said Blaineley. “I can count to five hundred ninety-eight while juggling eggs” said Josh.

“Well, speaking of Ezekiel. He recently joined activities!” said Blaineley. “Like…?” said Josh. “Counting to one hundred” said Blaineley. “How did you know that?” said Josh. “Exclusive report after you broke up with your girlfriend and you tried to eat some cake to relax both of you!” said Blaineley. “Oh…” said Josh. “Also, he joined swimming and almost drowned yesterday in a lake. He also made out with a mermaid” said Blaineley.

“Well, let’s move onto Noah” said Blaineley. “Noah is in the hospital, since he got ran over by fans last month and he collapsed, because of his weak legs” said Blaineley. “Noah, if you are watching this EAT MEAT!” said Josh. “And be as fat as your mom” said Blaineley. “She ate two full cakes for her birthday and got bloated… k?!” said Josh. “That’s what you said. But she told me it was meat” said Blaineley. “We have these pictures of Noah” said Josh, showing pictures of Noah in the hospital, a dog and a fangirl.

“Let’s move on to some DxC drama!” said Blaineley. A clip was seen with Duncan, Courtney and fans. “Courtney, Courtney! Can I have your autograph?!” said a guy. “No” said Courtney. The guy punched Courtney. “You do not hit a girl, you do not hit a girl!” said Duncan, as he walked away. “Hey! Can’t you save me?!” said Courtney. “Sure… you don’t deserve help” said Duncan. Courtney got up and growled at Duncan. “Fine, I’ll give you dinner to make it up with you!” said Duncan. Both of them walked away. “Later” said Blaineley, “They got tangled up into spaghetti when they tried to have it, not knowing it was just one. They kissed and spun around and got tied up!” The scene showed Duncan and Courtney spinning. “Let’s not blame anyone for this. It’s not any of our faults, but the WAITER!” said Courtney. “Don’t complain…” said Duncan. “I wish I had my PDA” said Courtney.

“And Duncan was lucky he didn’t say I wish I had Gwen has a girlfriend!” said Josh. “And also, Trent gave Gwen a text message that he is breaking up with her, but they are still friends. I guess the supposed kiss between Duncan and Gwen effected Courtney, Trent and the talking birds” said Blaineley. “Talking birds?” said Josh. “You know, Owen’s when he did that fake ab commercial a few weeks ago?” said Blaineley. “Oh yeah. Let’s watch that right now!” said Josh. The scene changed to Owen wearing fake abs. “Buy these abs. Talking birds will like you and you will look like a hot dog… Justin!” said Owen.

“Let’s move on to Eva, who started a boot camp!” said Josh. The tape showed LeShawna screaming: “CHECK YOUR MESSAGES. CHECK YOUR MESSAGES. MESSAGE!” “Yeah, she screamed that when she tried to sing a song with Jay-Z. Anyways, here’s the proper footage… I hope!” said Josh. Eva was pulling buses up and down, as kids watched. “You are up kid” said Eva. The kid tried to pull up and down the buses, but the force made him fly up in the sky and away. “Wrong, next!” said Eva. The next kid tried to lift the buses up and down and fell into a window on the bus. “Wrong again, next” said Eva. “Harshness for the win!” said Josh. “Mhm” said Blaineley. “Let’s move on to our lovebirds, Bridgette and Geoff!” said Blaineley. “I couldn’t have said it better, Blaineley” said Josh.

Bridgette and Geoff were in the airport and the purple haired girl, Sierra ran over and asked Geoff to sign her back. Geoff signed, which made Bridgette upset. Bridgette hit Geoff with a surfboard and they zoomed in on Geoff’s face, who was knocked out. “Ouch” said Blaineley. “Wait, this just in. Buses are arriving in the film set and only… eighteen people are there!” said Josh. “Let’s watch LIVE!” said Blaineley. Everyone at the camp sat in the craft services tent.

“Okay, it’s been a year since we ended last season and a lot has changed… no, just kidding. But I couldn’t get a contract for any shows and…” said Chris. “Wait, you are saying CHRIS MCLEAN couldn’t get a CONTRACT for a show?” said Heather. LeShawna laughed. Chris growled. “I can easily get Duncan instead of you” said Chris. “No, I am fine” said Heather. “Anyways, it seemed like last season was fun and whatever. What do you think about one more season?” said Chris. “OMG! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! YES! YES! YES!” said Sierra, watching Cody. “Another season of running around like loons, yay. Whatever” said Noah. “Thanks guys. And to just have some more fun, I am adding Alejandro and Sierra to the crew” said Chris. “Wait, that girl in the Aftermath?!” said Eva. “That has a few Total Drama blogs, well, a lot, yes!” said Sierra. “Wait, so are you saying you are that stalker girl?!” said Heather. “Hey, what color was my underwear?!” said Lindsay.

In the confessional, Bridgette says: “There’s no Geoff anywhere. I don’t want to compete in this season without my Geoffie-Poo!” In the confessional, Lindsay said: “Yay! I have a million thousand dollars and the RCMP is looking for Tyler and now I am in season three. I am finding you Tyler, nothing can hide you from me”. In the confessional, Courtney said: “Gwen putting leave her hands off my Duncan”. In the confessional, Gwen said: “Relief, no more Trent and no more nuts and pain. I hope there is no more torture in this season for me!” Alejandro said: “One by one, they’ll all go down”. In the confessional, Owen said: “In a new season, woot!” In the confessional, Izzy said: “Izzy is winning! Boom boom!” In the confessional, Sierra said: “Me, Heather, Noah, Eva, Bridgette, Lindsay, Cody, Courtney, Gwen, Owen, Izzy, LeShawna, Harold, DJ, Ezekiel and that new guy! I can’t believe Chris got another dog yesterday though. It’s so cute! It’s yellow and it’s name in Bongo. It fits in with Bango and Samantha!”

“Well, join us next time in Total Drama World Tour!” sung Chris and Chef, ending the season.

Elimination Table

# Contestant 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28
4th Ezekiel Debuts in episode nineteen. WIN6 IN7 IN IN OUT TDWT
6th Cody Debuts in episode eleven. LOW WIN IN IN IN IN4 IN IN OUT TDWT
7th Duncan IN OUT Returns in episode fourteen. WIN WIN IN IN IN QUIT TDWT

Color Code

  •      TDWT: Moved on to Total Drama World Tour.
  •      TDWT: Didn't move on to Total Drama World Tour.
  •      WIN: Won the competition.
  •      WIN: Was on winning team.
  •      WIN: Won individual challenge or won for their team.
  •      IN: Got a a marshmallow in the marshmallow ceremony.
  •      LOW: Got the final marshmallow in the marshmallow ceremony.
  •      QUIT: Quit the competition in this episode.
  •      OUT: Voted off in this episode.


  • 1: Lindsay talked on her cellphone and she wouldn't hang up. Chris announced that there will be no elimination that night.
  • 2: Justin quit the competition, because how Courtney wouldn't shut up, despite how he would get eliminated that night.
  • 3: Chris allowed the opposing team to vote for either Owen or Izzy's elimination after a tiebreaker. Owen gets eliminated.
  • 4: Cody won the challenge, but gave the reward to go to a cheese factory to a lady, which was Lindsay, opposeed to himself.
  • 5: Lindsay won the challenge and immunity, but gave the immunity to Heather, after getting confused if she won or not.
  • 6: Ezekiel joined the competition late in episode nineteen after Chris gave out costumes and was safe, since he didn't get one and it didn't had to be judged.
  • 7: Ezekiel won the challenge and immunity, but gave the immunity to Heather, after he got convinced by her to do so, resulting Gwen to be eliminated.
  • 8: Lindsay and Heather won the first challenge, but Heather didn't want to do the second challenge, leaving Lindsay to win. However, Lindsay didn't get the buffet and Heather did.

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